FH Mini 113 - Missed That Movie! - Perfect

[0:00] Hey, this is Stuart Wellington of the Flophouse podcast.

[0:08] This is a Flophouse mini.

[0:10] So on the off weeks when we don't release a full episode, we do a mini episode and that's

[0:14] what you're listening to right now.

[0:16] I'm Stuart Wellington, one of the hosts, and I'm joined by my other hosts, Dan McCoy and

[0:20] Elliot Kalin.

[0:21] We have an extra, well cool, Elliot's just establishing that he's the cool guy of the

[0:26] podcast.

[0:27] Yeah, that goes double for me.

[0:28] Double yo.

[0:29] So we got two cool guys on this podcast.

[0:31] Yo, yo, less cool than yo.

[0:32] I hate to break it to you, Dan.

[0:34] So we got two cool guys and one baby face.

[0:36] That's me, Stuart.

[0:37] But we also have an extra guest and that's not just a regular guest.

[0:39] We have a guest host because she's going to be doing a lot of the driving on this mini

[0:43] episode.

[0:44] Let me introduce my wife, Charlene Wellington.

[0:47] Hello Charlene.

[0:48] Hello.

[0:49] Yo, yo, yo.

[0:50] Oh, wow.

[0:51] We have three cool dudes on this podcast.

[0:53] Now Charlene is here for a number of reasons, but one of the key reasons is that she is

[0:58] promoting a new business, a new business venture called Jiggle Studios, a new fitness

[1:03] studio in Sunset Park, Brooklyn.

[1:07] It'll be Park Slope soon enough.

[1:10] Just let the real estate people have their way.

[1:11] In a few years it'll be Park Slope, yeah.

[1:13] You know, this just came to me that we did an episode before where we were opening a

[1:18] joke business.

[1:19] Yes.

[1:20] And it sounded almost exactly the same.

[1:22] Oh no.

[1:23] So how will we let the people know this is actually not a joke business?

[1:26] I mean, maybe you shouldn't have given your real business such a silly name.

[1:29] I think the level of concern you have about the confusion will let people know that it's

[1:34] a real business.

[1:35] Yeah.

[1:36] No, that's actually...

[1:37] I think we need your level of concern, Dan.

[1:38] And then maybe...

[1:39] Oh my God.

[1:40] What are we going to do?

[1:41] Yeah, yeah.

[1:42] This is going to keep me up at night.

[1:46] Yeah.

[1:47] When Professor Xavier reads Dan's mind, he's like, oh, fuck, who's that guy?

[1:52] He is worried.

[1:53] Like, whoa.

[1:54] He's like, do I have to step away from Cerebro for a little bit?

[2:00] It's weird.

[2:01] His life seems pretty good, but he can't seem to calm down.

[2:04] It's a cool mutant power you got there.

[2:07] So and also...

[2:09] We'll call you low self-esteem-o.

[2:12] On that joke business episode, I kept insisting that it was not a joke over and over, right?

[2:17] Oh, Dan.

[2:18] Oh, that's horrible.

[2:19] You're going to be in jail for it.

[2:20] Shut up.

[2:21] Yeah.

[2:22] So just to know that this is not a joke, you'll have to keep talking about what a joke it is,

[2:26] I guess.

[2:27] Yeah.

[2:28] Oh, yeah.

[2:29] Yeah.

[2:30] Yeah.

[2:31] That's the full loop.

[2:32] So we'll talk more about Jiggle Studios, which I'm sure you would love to.

[2:38] It sounds so fake.

[2:40] Yeah.

[2:41] Well, no, I mean, it's like a gym, but to me, I'm like, oh, this sounds like, you know,

[2:45] like a low rent.

[2:46] Like they would do movies for Showtime.

[2:48] Jiggle Studios would do...

[2:49] Jiggle Studios would be what Jiggle Studios...

[2:50] Yeah.

[2:51] That's just Jiggle Studio.

[2:52] It's not Studios.

[2:53] Jiggle Studios.

[2:54] You guys have inherited their grandpa's gym, and they need to make it profitable, so they

[2:58] make it a nude lady gym called Jiggle Studios.

[3:01] Yeah.

[3:02] Oh, man.

[3:03] Dan, what a...

[3:04] So I've chosen the wrong name.

[3:05] Oh, God.

[3:06] Got it.

[3:07] Okay.

[3:08] Let's change this to Critique My New Business Endeavor Podcast.

[3:11] I'm just trying to offload some of my anxiety onto you, Charlotte.

[3:14] Thank you.

[3:15] Appreciate it.

[3:16] So we've talked in depth about Jiggle Studio and your upcoming crowdfunding campaign.

[3:23] Yes.

[3:24] But can you give a quick summary of what Jiggle Studio is all about?

[3:27] So Jiggle Studio is a real fitness studio in Sunset Park, Brooklyn.

[3:33] Not a joke, everybody.

[3:35] Next to Minnie's.

[3:36] I am renting the space next to Minnie's.

[3:39] And it is...

[3:40] Oh, Minnie's.

[3:41] That's that really cool bar that I've heard about.

[3:42] It's a very cool bar.

[3:44] And it's a class-based studio where we focus on movement for joy and never for weight loss.

[3:53] So we like to say, move the body you have.

[3:56] Okay.

[3:57] And that sounds great.

[3:58] So to go along with that, we are going to do a special mini episode where we normally

[4:03] on mini episodes, we just talk about whatever.

[4:05] But today we're going to do just that thing.

[4:08] We are going to talk about whatever.

[4:09] We're going to do an episode of the classic, I think the original mini format, we are going

[4:17] to do a Missed That Movie.

[4:19] Charlene and I watched the John Travolta, Jamie Lee Curtis vehicle, Perfect, which is

[4:26] based on a true article in Rolling Stone magazine.

[4:31] Yes.

[4:32] There really was an article.

[4:34] I don't know if the article was true, but it was based on an actual article.

[4:39] And this is also fun because this is going to be Charlene's time to get to do a summary.

[4:45] The thing that she would make fun of me for, and she's like, you do it so, like, Dan and

[4:49] Elliot and Stuart do such bad jobs summarizing movies.

[4:52] Now she has to try.

[4:54] I mean, I don't, I say that in my sleep, so it's not on purpose.

[5:00] Yeah.

[5:01] Okay.

[5:02] That's the secret that she keeps.

[5:03] So you let me know when to start.

[5:06] And then.

[5:07] Yeah.

[5:08] Now?

[5:09] Okay.

[5:10] All right.

[5:11] So perfect.

[5:12] We open to Jersey City.

[5:13] Here it happens.

[5:14] Jersey City, 1985, newspaper office.

[5:15] Adam, played by John Travolta.

[5:16] Oh, boy.

[5:17] He's an unhappy obituary writer.

[5:18] Yeah.

[5:19] Cut to New York City five years later.

[5:20] Uh-huh.

[5:21] I'll keep an eye on it.

[5:22] I love it.

[5:23] Yeah.

[5:24] Yeah.

[5:25] Stuart, you passed along my.

[5:26] Yeah.

[5:27] Yeah.

[5:28] Yeah.

[5:29] Yeah.

[5:30] Yeah.

[5:31] Yeah.

[5:32] Yeah.

[5:33] Yeah.

[5:34] Yeah.

[5:35] Yeah.

[5:36] Yeah.

[5:37] Stuart, you passed along my request to keep it short today.

[5:40] This was the thing that.

[5:41] Oh, I thought we were still goofing.

[5:42] I thought that was a goof, Dan.

[5:44] You put it in italics.

[5:45] I know.

[5:46] A little crying, laughing emoji.

[5:47] I just cut five years out of it.

[5:48] Okay.

[5:49] That's good.

[5:50] Guys, just to pull back the curtain.

[5:52] When we, in the Flop House group chat, Dan is the emoji king.

[5:56] He is constantly throwing emojis.

[5:57] He loves them.

[5:58] He loves them.

[5:59] Elliot's dropping gifs on everything.

[6:00] Me, I'm a sticker boy.

[6:02] I use stickers, mainly pictures of myself that I've turned into stickers.

[6:06] Yeah.

[6:07] Yeah.

[6:08] Okay.

[6:09] Go.

[6:10] Go, Charlene.

[6:11] Okay.

[6:12] So New York City, now he's working for Rolling Stone Magazine.

[6:14] We know that because there are pictures of a lot of famous celebrities.

[6:18] Stones?

[6:19] Yeah.

[6:20] Rolling Stone performers.

[6:21] They even do pictures of Mick Jagger.

[6:24] Yeah.

[6:25] They're pictures of Mick Jagger.

[6:26] And then his editor, I guess, sends him to California to cover two very important stories.

[6:34] So he's been in three different states already by the time of the movie.

[6:38] Yes.

[6:39] Yes.

[6:40] And Charlene completely, I mean, she's keeping it tight.

[6:41] She glossed over the fact that Carly Simon shows up and throws what looks like a glass

[6:44] of tomato juice that is in a coop glass into John Travolta's face.

[6:50] We didn't get up to that yet, but yeah.

[6:52] But Carly Simon was actually in it, which is really as herself.

[6:55] And he was like, oh no, it's Carly Simon.

[6:57] And yeah.

[6:58] You're so vain.

[6:59] Yeah.

[7:00] Oh.

[7:01] That song was about him.

[7:02] Yeah.

[7:03] So, yeah.

[7:04] So he has to cover these two very important stories.

[7:08] One, they never really make it clear what it's about, but it's very important.

[7:13] And somebody has to testify.

[7:14] Somebody's on trial for selling microchips to another country.

[7:18] Okay.

[7:19] Something like that.

[7:20] All right.

[7:21] It's never clear.

[7:22] And the other important story are health clubs, the new singles bars.

[7:25] Oh, okay.

[7:26] And it's kind of like a take, like it meant to be like a takedown hit piece, right?

[7:30] Yes.

[7:31] Because that's his specialty.

[7:32] He writes, he writes like hit pieces.

[7:34] That's why Carly Simon threw that tomato juice.

[7:36] You know, I was, I was, you know, I was young in the eighties, but I did, I did live through

[7:40] it.

[7:41] And I recall back then it was sort of treated as an amazing thing that people might want

[7:46] to exercise.

[7:47] Yeah.

[7:48] Yeah.

[7:49] Yeah.

[7:50] It was.

[7:52] I mean, we, we had just been through the seventies, which was the decade of self-destruction.

[7:56] It was really cool to do a lot of drugs and just be filthy and sweaty all the time.

[8:01] And the eighties was when people were like, we got to get back into shape.

[8:04] Come on America.

[8:05] This is bonkers.

[8:06] It's morning.

[8:07] I heard.

[8:08] Yeah.

[8:09] In the eighties, it's like, if you're going to do drugs, do ones that at least make you

[8:10] very energetic.

[8:11] Yeah.

[8:12] I mean, the seventies, the seventies was all about cocaine as opposed to the eighties,

[8:15] which were all about cocaine.

[8:16] I guess.

[8:18] People were so tired that in the nineties they needed heroin to just kind of get them

[8:21] some sleep, you know?

[8:22] And also cocaine.

[8:23] The seventies were quaaludes, man.

[8:24] Quaaludes.

[8:25] Don't be naive, Dan.

[8:26] Come on.

[8:27] I think you're correct.

[8:28] Yeah.

[8:29] Do they make quaaludes out of quails?

[8:30] Yes.

[8:31] That's why we don't, that's why they don't exist anymore.

[8:32] They're extinct?

[8:33] Yeah.

[8:34] No, wait, they're not extinct.

[8:35] They went, just like when people used to smoke passenger pigeons.

[8:36] That's why we don't have those anymore.

[8:37] Okay.

[8:38] So, John Travolta, uh, shows up at this giant, uh, sports and racket club and I feel like

[8:53] gyms were way bigger in the eighties and they always had racquetball and, uh, racquetball

[8:58] was huge.

[8:59] Sports Connection or something?

[9:00] Oh yeah.

[9:01] I deleted what the name was.

[9:02] I think it's called Sports Connection.

[9:03] Yeah.

[9:04] It's something like that.

[9:05] Sport, but it's a health and racket club.

[9:07] Okay.

[9:09] So tell me about this club.

[9:10] What's it like?

[9:11] Um, so we got racquetball, we got a bunch of people dressed in amazing bodysuits and

[9:16] tights, headbands, leg warmers.

[9:20] Guys, I know that, uh, I know I'm a firm believer in the concept that nobody cares about your

[9:24] boner, but like, I love eighties workout.

[9:29] I'm confused by leg warmers cause that was big in the eighties.

[9:32] You don't see them at all since the eighties.

[9:35] I was like, is it a problem?

[9:36] Like we're legs cold.

[9:38] Like I feel like from the oil crisis, there was less heat to go around and we're still

[9:45] dealing with that.

[9:46] So that people's legs, cause that's the lower part.

[9:49] Hot air rises.

[9:50] The top half of your body is going to be warm.

[9:52] Cold air settles around your tootsies and so you need leg warmers to keep those warm.

[9:55] Yeah.

[9:56] Based on the amount of sweating I do.

[10:00] at my yoga class, a relatively low impact thing.

[10:03] Also my yoga class.

[10:04] Yeah, yeah, Charlene has begun to, now we're yoga buddies.

[10:07] We go to yoga together.

[10:09] It's true, this is another true thing and not a joke.

[10:12] Real quick, who farts more?

[10:15] I mean, it's a whole class of people.

[10:17] Real quick, one more thing,

[10:18] this is Stuart from Rolling Stone Magazine.

[10:21] Just one more question, Carly Simon, how much do you fart?

[10:25] I'm just saying, I've never been like,

[10:27] oh, I wanna put like a layer of wool on my legs doing this.

[10:31] So the 80s was all about like dance culture, right?

[10:35] And all of the popular movies were about dancing

[10:37] and leg warmers. Flash dance, dance flash,

[10:40] flash flash, dance dance.

[10:41] Flash dance fucking rules,

[10:42] like that is a movie where it's like Steel Town

[10:45] has nothing else going on,

[10:47] but this like fucking kind of, kind of strip club

[10:50] that's mainly just like women dancing.

[10:53] Like it is packed all the time.

[10:55] Because they're amazing.

[10:57] Yeah.

[10:58] I mean, how long does it take to set up that,

[11:01] the water on the top of the stage?

[11:04] And then she pulls it and then they have to take a break

[11:06] and they gotta dry the stage.

[11:07] And there was that one time

[11:09] where they accidentally got buckets mixed up

[11:11] and they ended with the bucket from Carrie

[11:12] and she pulled it, she had pig's blood all over.

[11:15] That's not easy to clean.

[11:17] And she gets magic powers

[11:18] and that's how Carrie got her magic powers, right?

[11:20] Yeah, yeah, the pig's blood is the telekinetic power

[11:23] that all pigs have.

[11:24] Kind of skim the book and movie.

[11:28] So yeah, so they're wearing body suits.

[11:30] They're wearing the body suits with the belt

[11:32] that's like goes inside the body suit,

[11:35] comes out the other side.

[11:37] We get a couple of famous faces in there too, right?

[11:39] We got Mary Lou Henner.

[11:41] We got Lorraine Newman.

[11:42] What?

[11:43] What, hold on.

[11:44] Yeah, we're holding on.

[11:46] Oh, yeah.

[11:47] You wanna say something about Lorraine Newman?

[11:48] Yeah, I just needed time to process

[11:49] Lorraine Newman being there.

[11:50] Okay, I'm ready.

[11:51] Okay.

[11:52] And then we have Jamie Lee Curtis

[11:55] who is teaching the most popular aerobics class in the world.

[11:59] Less of a surprise that she's there

[12:01] because she's one of the stars of the movie.

[12:02] Yes, yes.

[12:04] Yeah, she teaches aerobics.

[12:06] It's also, I think they call it slimmer size.

[12:09] Sure, of course.

[12:10] It's mostly, if the footage I've seen is any indication,

[12:12] it's mostly a lot of hip thrusting.

[12:14] Oh my God, it is.

[12:16] Hip thrusting.

[12:17] I have never seen the movie Perfect,

[12:19] but I've seen the clip of them gyrating their hips

[12:23] at least 20 times.

[12:24] It's so much worse than you think it is.

[12:27] And so much longer.

[12:27] We're not there yet, but we could skip around.

[12:30] I'm not a stickler like this guy,

[12:32] stickler McCoy over here.

[12:36] Oh, man.

[12:39] So, maybe I am.

[12:41] All right, let's go back.

[12:42] So, I take it back, I take it back.

[12:44] So, Jersey City, 1985.

[12:46] No, Adam's writing obituaries.

[12:51] So, Jamie Lee Curtis is teaching an aerobics class,

[12:54] and this classroom is two levels

[12:57] of people taking the class.

[12:59] There's people upstairs, downstairs, they're all, anyway.

[13:04] So, he is immediately, John Travolta,

[13:07] enamored by her because she's amazing.

[13:09] And he wants to use her in his article.

[13:13] But she won't do it.

[13:15] Something in her past, something bad.

[13:17] She was hurt by an article.

[13:18] She was hurt by an article.

[13:19] She doesn't want Michael Myers to find her.

[13:21] She's in the-

[13:22] Oh, that's probably it.

[13:24] This is pre-Michael Myers, no?

[13:26] No, I think this is, it's got to be after.

[13:28] No, this is about nine years after, right?

[13:30] Really?

[13:31] Or 79, I don't know.

[13:33] Like 76.

[13:34] You're thinking of Mike Myers.

[13:36] He was on Saturday Night Live after this.

[13:39] Oh, yes, so Halloween is 1978.

[13:41] So, Halloween, the movie is 1978.

[13:43] That's Michael Myers, the killer.

[13:44] Mike Myers, the comedian, he won't be around for a while.

[13:49] You might know him as Shrek.

[13:51] I do know him.

[13:52] Dan, can you drop your famous Shrek impression?

[13:56] Hey, donkey.

[13:57] Stop, stop being a fool.

[13:59] Stop, I'm gonna laugh too much.

[14:01] Now, Dan, do your love guru impression.

[14:02] Shirlene, you should probably continue

[14:02] before I crack up.

[14:03] I'm so confused.

[14:05] Do I make you horny?

[14:05] Oh, man, you're dropping so much harder

[14:07] than I thought it was.

[14:10] Okay, now, Dan, do his Jewish mom cat in the hat

[14:13] that he does.

[14:14] Does he just do Linda Richman for the cat in the hat?

[14:17] It's pretty much Linda Richman, yeah.

[14:19] That's actually kind of, I gotta watch Cat in the Hat.

[14:23] How amazing, what an amazing piece of stunt casting

[14:25] would it be if the new Halloween movies,

[14:26] he had pulled off his mask

[14:27] and it was Mike Myers underneath?

[14:29] Oh, I mean, A plus, four stars.

[14:32] Yeah.

[14:34] Are you still doing the Linda Richman voice?

[14:37] Perfect.

[14:38] So, Adam wants Jamie Lee Curtis.

[14:40] I'm gonna go back and forth.

[14:42] Joe Travolta wants Jamie Lee Curtis for his article.

[14:44] She can't do it.

[14:45] She was once hurt by an article.

[14:46] Then we cut to Adam goes to a strip club for,

[14:50] we have no idea why.

[14:51] It turns out it has to do with the other story.

[14:53] Oh, I mean, a lot of guys don't need

[14:55] an extra reason to do that.

[14:57] No, he was there to see a specific stripper.

[15:00] Okay. Oh, I see.

[15:00] And it had to do with this other story that, again,

[15:03] I was gonna say a lot of movies from the 80s

[15:05] didn't need to have a reason to go to a strip club.

[15:07] No.

[15:08] I guess this had a thinly veiled reason.

[15:12] Then we cut back to the gym

[15:14] and he's still trying to pester Jamie Lee Curtis

[15:17] to do the article.

[15:18] And she goes to work in her bodysuit,

[15:21] which is what I noticed.

[15:22] She doesn't like change when she gets there.

[15:24] Then what else?

[15:25] LA weather, baby.

[15:26] Says something about shrimp cocktail,

[15:28] aerobics by Piper.

[15:29] You're doing a good job.

[15:32] I've got good notes.

[15:34] No, I love it.

[15:34] It makes me wonder.

[15:38] But he asks her to go to lunch with him

[15:40] and they go to lunch

[15:42] and she tells him her story

[15:45] or about how she doesn't trust reporters

[15:48] and this and that.

[15:49] And then they have sex

[15:51] and he promises that, not at lunch,

[15:53] they go back to his hotel room and have sex.

[15:55] And he promises he's not gonna use her in his article.

[15:57] It would have been unsanitary if he did it

[15:59] at the restaurant.

[16:00] It seemed to be an ethical breach at that point

[16:03] because he took her home to have sex.

[16:05] I mean, it's entirely,

[16:07] no matter what the location,

[16:08] it's an ethical breach, right?

[16:10] Well, I'm just saying that if he then used her

[16:12] in the article, it's all the more so.

[16:15] Not if it's in the bathroom of a bar.

[16:18] That's not an ethical breach.

[16:19] Yeah, but that's a bar breach

[16:21] because then they break the sink.

[16:22] Yeah, they break the sink every time.

[16:24] Don't have sex on the bar sink.

[16:26] Use the power of your own legs

[16:28] if you're gonna have sex in the bathroom.

[16:30] But there is a perfectly good sink right there.

[16:32] It would save a lot of energy.

[16:34] But the thing is, it's not perfectly good.

[16:36] It's not meant to hold that much weight.

[16:37] I think you're overestimating

[16:38] how well that sink is attached to the wall.

[16:41] Yeah, it's true.

[16:43] So what you're really saying is

[16:44] when you're having sex in a bar bathroom,

[16:46] take a moment, test the strength of the sink

[16:48] with little increments

[16:50] so you can make sure you're not overloading it.

[16:52] Yeah, slowly stacking quarters now.

[16:56] Until there's a critical failure,

[16:58] how are you gonna know, though?

[16:59] I don't understand.

[17:00] Well, no, you start seeing

[17:02] when it starts to show you failure.

[17:04] Oh, okay.

[17:05] It starts creaking.

[17:06] In the same way, they don't test

[17:07] the weight limit on a bridge

[17:08] by just putting heavier things on the bridge

[17:10] until it breaks and then rebuilding it again

[17:13] and putting up a sign that says not this much.

[17:15] Charlene, when we were watching The Gilded Age,

[17:16] you kept saying that's how they tested

[17:18] the structural integrity of the Brooklyn Bridge, right?

[17:21] I mean-

[17:22] They put elephants on it until it collapsed.

[17:24] The way they proved that there was structural integrity

[17:27] was the elephants went across.

[17:30] Because they had a couple have sex on the bridge

[17:31] and people were like, oh, it's mine.

[17:34] And they kept adding people to the couple.

[17:36] Mm-hmm.

[17:37] Oh, wow.

[17:38] Yeah, exactly.

[17:38] It was a throuple.

[17:39] All right, now I'm interested in history.

[17:41] Yeah, the great bridge orgy of 1877, yeah.

[17:45] Dan's like, they had poly people back then?

[17:47] What?

[17:49] So they have sex.

[17:51] Then she convinces him to take her class.

[17:53] And then the class is, it's like 20 minutes,

[17:58] or it felt like 24 minutes of them just thrusting

[18:02] and looking at each other.

[18:03] And eye contact and thrusting.

[18:03] And sweating.

[18:04] And I will say, I'm very impressed by the fact

[18:06] that every time she teaches a class,

[18:09] everybody knows the fucking move.

[18:10] She does not call out a single move.

[18:12] Everybody's like, yeah, I guess I have committed

[18:15] to this hour-long hip thrusting class.

[18:17] But it's totally thrusting.

[18:19] And it just goes from Jamie Lee Curtis to John Travolta

[18:23] in his tiny shorts and his floppy dick.

[18:26] And he's just like, thrust, thrust.

[18:28] A lot of balls.

[18:29] I feel like there's a lot of balls action going on.

[18:31] That was the 80s.

[18:32] People were into that in the 80s.

[18:34] And then at one point, they get on the floor

[18:35] and do more hip thrusting, but just from a different position.

[18:38] Sounds like a lot of core strength to me.

[18:40] Just that one part of the core.

[18:42] It's a total core hip thrust workout.

[18:45] Yeah.

[18:46] It goes on and on and on.

[18:47] So what Charlene's trying to say is,

[18:49] I think this is a perfect segue.

[18:52] The Jiggle Studio's gonna feature a weekly hip thrust class.

[18:56] Just hip thrust class.

[18:57] It's just an hour of hip thrusts and eye contact.

[19:00] You have to be maintaining eye contact the entire time.

[19:02] You must have the eye contact.

[19:03] That's the real work.

[19:04] That's the real exercise work.

[19:05] No sunglasses indoors, Dan McCoy.

[19:09] How will people know I'm cool?

[19:13] Is this really when we're gonna take the time

[19:15] to talk about Jiggle Studio?

[19:17] No, keep going.

[19:18] Okay.

[19:19] We didn't come up with a signal.

[19:21] So, all right, let me-

[19:22] A certain thrust is hip.

[19:23] Notes again.

[19:24] It is hip, so I'm gonna send you it, yeah.

[19:26] So, pelvic thrusts, then they go back to her house.

[19:32] Yeah, Charlene's notes has a lot of pictures

[19:34] of John Travolta hip thrusts.

[19:37] Those are called gifs.

[19:38] Yeah, they are a gif.

[19:40] Yeah, John Travolta's gif to the world, yeah.

[19:43] Yeah, they go back to her house.

[19:46] I think her mother's there.

[19:48] She tells him the real story

[19:50] of how a reporter did an expose on her

[19:54] when she was a swimmer in high school.

[19:57] She was supposed to go to the Olympics.

[19:58] She had an affair with a-

[20:00] coach, and then they go skiing, and then they're laying on a table outside, and she's wearing

[20:10] a tank top and sweatpants, but there's snow on the ground.

[20:13] Kind of getting in the weeds here, but that's okay.

[20:16] I didn't understand that part.

[20:17] Anyway.

[20:18] This is the quicker version.

[20:19] Tell us what the weather is like in all the snow scenes.

[20:23] I don't know where they were skiing.

[20:24] What people like the refreshing sort of feel of that?

[20:27] Yeah, it felt like maybe Palm Springs based on where they're driving, but you know.

[20:31] Then they're driving back, and she's telling him more of her back story, and she looks

[20:37] over and she realizes he's recording their conversation, and she threw him out of the

[20:42] car.

[20:43] But like, when you start dating somebody, you record all the conversations you have,

[20:47] right?

[20:48] Yeah.

[20:49] You have receipts.

[20:50] Yeah, you can throw things back in their face later on.

[20:51] Exactly.

[20:52] Yeah.

[20:53] I started this podcast so that I could have ammunition against Dan and Elliot.

[20:59] So now, she's mad at him.

[21:00] She's not talking to him.

[21:01] He goes back to his hotel room.

[21:03] There's a Boy George convention?

[21:04] That's true.

[21:05] That happens.

[21:06] So what's the perfect thing?

[21:08] So far, I'm confused about the title.

[21:10] Actually, we are getting there.

[21:12] We're getting there.

[21:13] We're getting there.

[21:14] This movie was two hours long.

[21:16] So there's a Boy George convention, which means there's a lot of people dressed up in

[21:20] one specific Boy George outfit.

[21:22] I see.

[21:23] Hanging around a pool, chanting Boy over and over in your life.

[21:27] Are there like academic papers being presented on Boy George, that kind of thing?

[21:33] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[21:34] They keep saying Boy a lot, and at first, I'm like, is this a phantasm convention?

[21:38] Yeah.

[21:39] You play a good record, Boy George.

[21:42] You won me right round.

[21:45] I don't think that's it.

[21:46] That's not Boy George.

[21:47] Oh, that's not Boy George.

[21:48] Karma Chameleon.

[21:49] Yes.

[21:50] Correct.

[21:51] Yeah, but it doesn't sound as much like it.

[21:52] You've made a real Karma Chameleon out of me, Boy.

[21:54] It doesn't sound as good as this.

[21:55] Do you really want to hurt me, Boy?

[21:57] Oh, there you go.

[21:58] That's fair.

[21:59] That's fair.

[22:00] So speaking of Karma Chameleon.

[22:01] Walk like an Egyptian, Boy.

[22:02] No, that's the angles.

[22:03] When I was in camp, I feel like Elliot will like this.

[22:07] When I was in camp and we would make songs up to other, you know, pop songs.

[22:13] So there was a song, Kosher Chameleon, that somebody made up and it went, kosher, kosher,

[22:18] kosher, kosher, kosher, chameleon.

[22:21] Eats food that's treif when it is safe.

[22:25] Oh, that's great.

[22:26] Only when it's safe.

[22:27] Really?

[22:28] Yeah, man, we're really softballing our fucking worst belt audience.

[22:29] I couldn't not sing kosher chameleon.

[22:30] No, it's good stuff.

[22:31] So they're mad at each other.

[22:32] He's going to do the article about everybody else.

[22:33] He goes to a party at Mary Lou Henner's house.

[22:34] She's dating a Chippendale dancer.

[22:35] Oh, yeah.

[22:36] There's a long Chippendale's dance.

[22:37] Oh, yeah.

[22:39] Oh, yeah.

[22:41] Oh, yeah.

[22:43] Oh, yeah.

[22:52] Also, big in the 80s.

[22:55] This movie is all about 80s stuff.

[22:57] He takes all these notes.

[22:58] Somebody refers to Lorraine Newman as the most used piece of equipment in the gym.

[23:07] Wow.

[23:08] Yes.

[23:09] I don't treat Lorraine Newman like that.

[23:11] No.

[23:12] Exactly.

[23:13] Not okay.

[23:14] And he's talking to them and they're all speaking kind of relaxed, almost as if it's off the

[23:20] record.

[23:21] They're all getting drunk.

[23:22] It's a party.

[23:24] But he's recording this whole conversation.

[23:26] Lorraine Newman's character reveals why she likes gyms so much, yeah?

[23:31] Which is this whole idea of she's like, there's nothing wrong wanting to be perfect.

[23:36] That's why she goes to the gym.

[23:38] That's why she wants to have plastic surgery, et cetera, et cetera.

[23:41] Yeah.

[23:42] And this is the moral of the movie.

[23:43] Yes.

[23:44] Yes.

[23:45] You should do all this stuff.

[23:46] Yeah.

[23:47] Yeah.

[23:48] Okay.

[23:49] So Adam has a change of heart.

[23:51] Yes.

[23:52] I think this change of heart, I think, also signals a brief change in the podcast where

[23:56] I will pivot to a thing called promoting Flop TV.

[23:59] Oh.

[24:00] I don't know if you know about Flop.

[24:02] Yeah.

[24:03] Everybody else got very nervous because they're like, look, is this another one of Stuart's

[24:05] wacky episodes?

[24:06] No, this is a normal episode.

[24:09] So right now we are in the middle of Flop TV season two.

[24:17] We did a season last year that was six months.

[24:20] This is an episode a month where we do a really fun live show.

[24:23] They're a little truncated, trimmed down versions of our normal live shows.

[24:29] But we get to watch some movies that we're very excited to do.

[24:32] And this time we are watching and talking about sequels.

[24:35] Number twos.

[24:36] Are they number twos or are they number ones?

[24:39] We'll find out.

[24:42] We've already done one on RoboCop 2 and it was so much fun.

[24:44] It was really cool to get to do the show with you guys.

[24:47] And it also gives us an opportunity to throw little bits of extra bits and bobs, some pre-recorded

[24:52] stuff.

[24:53] And it's a really cool thing that we get to do.

[24:56] And you can watch it at home live or you can watch it in wherever you want to watch it,

[25:02] wherever you have a internet signal.

[25:04] You do need an internet connection, but otherwise the world is your oyster.

[25:08] You know, as long as that oyster has an internet connection.

[25:11] Yes, an internet connection.

[25:12] Watch it on the toilet.

[25:13] You can.

[25:14] I mean, that's where I'm assuming most people watch it.

[25:17] You can watch it on a boat.

[25:18] You can watch it with a goat.

[25:19] You can watch it with a stoat.

[25:22] You can watch it with a fox, a stoat too, you know.

[25:25] Stoat is kind of like a fox.

[25:26] I will.

[25:27] I will watch Flop TV.

[25:28] I think.

[25:29] Yeah, it's kind of like a weasel.

[25:30] I will.

[25:31] I will watch it.

[25:32] Sam, I. B.

[25:33] So you're probably like, what's the next?

[25:34] Flop TV sounds super fun.

[25:35] I can't wait to watch it.

[25:37] What's the next one?

[25:38] Well, of course, we are watching Break Into Electric Boogaloo.

[25:41] Tonight, the night that this episode is released, we'll be watching Break Into, we'll be talking

[25:45] about Break Into Electric Boogaloo.

[25:46] About Break Into Electric Boogaloo.

[25:48] And I'm very excited because Charlene was a big fan of Breakin' and Breakin' Away, as

[25:54] well as Break Into Electric Boogaloo.

[25:56] There's going to be not as much Breakin' Away content at the end of the show.

[26:03] OK.

[26:04] And just to let you guys know, if you want to get tickets and join in on the fun, it

[26:06] is go to theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[26:11] You can get tickets to individual shows or you can get a season pass.

[26:15] And that gives you access to not only the shows that are coming up, but also every show

[26:19] that we've done so far this season.

[26:21] It's going to be a lot of fun and I like doing it.

[26:24] Also, I think this is a really good time for Charlene to explain, now that we've heard

[26:28] a little bit about what the gyms are like in the movie Perfect, what's Jiggle Studio

[26:32] all about?

[26:34] So unlike the movie Perfect, Jiggle Studio does not want you to strive to be perfect.

[26:41] OK.

[26:42] So in Jiggle Studio, you can be exactly who you are.

[26:47] It's a place where you can take all kinds of classes.

[26:50] We're going to have yoga.

[26:51] We're going to have burlesque.

[26:53] We're going to have theatrical fighting classes.

[26:58] One of my favorite ones is the Hangover Helper class.

[27:01] Yes, Hangover Helper, where it's 20 minutes of light cardio followed by 20 minutes of

[27:08] stretching in a dark room with low music, followed by a cup of warm vegetable soup.

[27:15] That is for real.

[27:17] It's always been my dream to have a fitness studio that focuses on just moving your body

[27:25] and having fun as opposed to the drudgery of trying to get thinner, trying to get bigger,

[27:31] trying to change your body.

[27:32] And the opportunity came because I have the space next to it.

[27:38] I have minis.

[27:39] It's the same landlord.

[27:41] So hopefully we'll have some cool crossover events.

[27:44] And we're going to be doing a Kickstarter to raise money to build it.

[27:47] I have to put in a new floor.

[27:49] I have to put in new bathrooms.

[27:52] We're going to have mirrors.

[27:53] Mirrors.

[27:54] But you also need curtains to cover the mirrors?

[27:56] Curtains, yes.

[27:58] So there will be merch, and you can follow our progress on Instagram at jiggle underscore

[28:05] studio BK.

[28:08] And hopefully the Kickstarter will be launched by the time this episode is up.

[28:14] But if not, just follow us.

[28:16] We're on Facebook.

[28:17] You can follow.

[28:18] We'll be putting updates in the Flophouse social media.

[28:24] Or my personal.

[28:25] Or Stuart's personal.

[28:28] So keep posted.

[28:30] This is for real.

[28:32] And jiggle studio.

[28:33] I like this episode.

[28:34] It's all not like, no, this is all for real.

[28:36] This is for real, you guys.

[28:38] This is for real.

[28:39] Also good news, guys.

[28:40] A stoat is a type of ermine.

[28:41] Oh.

[28:42] Okay.

[28:43] So that's also late breaking news.

[28:45] Okay.

[28:46] And ermine.

[28:47] Is that breaking news?

[28:48] Yeah.

[28:49] I broke it here.

[28:50] And ermine is an animal that they used to make fur coats out of?

[28:54] Yeah, yeah.

[28:55] From the Frank Sinatra song.

[28:56] Yeah.

[28:57] Oh.

[28:58] Great.

[28:59] So I guess this is how stuff works now, right now, or things you should know.

[29:04] It's a very popular podcast, if only.

[29:09] Is there like a, is there a true crime podcast called like, how stuff dies?

[29:15] Probably.

[29:16] There's at least a gardening podcast.

[29:21] Yeah.

[29:22] Hi.

[29:23] I'm Alexis.

[29:24] And I'm Ella.

[29:25] And we're the hosts of Comfort Creatures.

[29:26] We could spend the next 28 seconds telling you why you should listen.

[29:27] But instead, here's what our listeners have said about our show, because really, they

[29:28] do their best.

[29:29] The show is filled with stories, and poems, and science, and friendship, and laughter,

[29:30] and tears sometimes.

[29:31] But tears are from your heart being so filled up with love.

[29:32] A cozy show about enthusiasm for animals of all kinds, real and unreal.

[29:33] If you greet the dog before the person walking them, or wander around the party looking for

[29:34] the host's cat, this podcast is for you.

[29:35] So come for the comfort and stay for Alexis's wild story about waking up to her cat giving

[29:58] birth on top of her.

[29:59] So if that's

[30:00] like your cup of tea.

[30:01] Or coffee, although we're not all Brits.

[30:03] Then join us.

[30:03] Every Thursday at MaximumFun.org.

[30:08] Hey, this is Mike Cavallon.

[30:09] Ify Wadiwe.

[30:10] And Sierra Cotto.

[30:11] The hosts of TV Chef Fantasy League.

[30:14] Where we are currently using fantasy sports rules

[30:16] to watch Great British Bake Off.

[30:18] Or the Great British Baking Show,

[30:20] as it's known here in America.

[30:22] We've drafted the bakers onto our teams

[30:23] and now those bakers are earning us points

[30:25] based on how they're doing on the show.

[30:27] And at the end of the season,

[30:28] one of us will win the prestigious

[30:30] TV Chef Fantasy League trophy crown.

[30:34] What is the?

[30:35] Yeah, I don't know.

[30:35] I keep forgetting to order something.

[30:36] Probably just dinner.

[30:37] Anyway, subscribe to TV Chef Fantasy League

[30:39] and play along with us at home.

[30:40] Or just listen in as we cry over our bakers' soggy bombs.

[30:44] On MaximumFun.org or wherever you get your podcasts.

[30:52] We have a couple of late-breaking jumbotrons for you.

[30:56] This message is for Brendan Berber.

[31:00] And it's from Denise, your berb.

[31:04] Happy birthday, Brendan.

[31:06] I hope this message from your favorite original peaches

[31:09] makes your day.

[31:10] Rawr-rawr!

[31:12] I'm sorry for taking that from Stuart.

[31:15] I will pay you for your intellectual properties, too.

[31:18] You're amazing.

[31:19] You're an amazing double doctor

[31:21] and a more amazing spouse and double dog dad.

[31:25] There's no one I would rather make up

[31:27] stream-of-consciousness songs about.

[31:29] I love you.

[31:30] Love, Denise Cassidy and Rufio.

[31:34] A very sweet message for Brendan.

[31:38] Happy birthday.

[31:39] And one more.

[31:41] This message is for Haley.

[31:43] It is from the Dan Brown Tattoos.

[31:47] And it goes like this.

[31:48] Congrats to Haley from your fellow Dan Brown Tattoos

[31:52] on the occasion of your PhD defense.

[31:55] We are writing this before said defense,

[31:57] which we hope slash assume was successful

[32:00] due to how you've been practicing your crane kicks.

[32:03] Thanks for being our quiz time scorekeeper

[32:05] slash curator of data,

[32:07] even if you refuse to curate all of the data we clearly need.

[32:11] So congratulations on your PhD in, I guess, crane kicking.

[32:18] And that is it for the Jumbotrons.

[32:23] All right, so our main character, wow.

[32:27] Our main character, Adam, has a change of heart.

[32:31] And he does not write the scathing article

[32:33] that he took notes about.

[32:35] He writes some kind of not really good article,

[32:38] sends it in, and his editor is like,

[32:41] what the hell is this?

[32:42] This article sucks.

[32:43] And he has somebody in his office rewrite the article.

[32:48] Using the notes.

[32:49] Using the notes, making it even more scathing.

[32:53] And they put Jamie Lee Curtis's character in it.

[32:58] Named her, they referenced the former article.

[33:02] It's so much worse than it could ever be.

[33:05] And they used his byline,

[33:08] which that's got to be a crime of some kind.

[33:12] He's already moved on.

[33:13] He's in Morocco.

[33:15] And he calls-

[33:16] Reporting on the exercise scene there.

[33:20] And he calls Jamie Lee Curtis

[33:23] because he's like, hey, the article came out.

[33:24] You're going to see.

[33:25] It's going to be awesome.

[33:26] But it's not awesome.

[33:28] So he flies back to New York,

[33:32] takes a baseball bat,

[33:33] and smashes up the Rolling Stones office.

[33:36] Rolling Stone office.

[33:38] Yeah, not the office of the Rolling Stones, the band.

[33:42] Yeah.

[33:43] Got confused.

[33:44] Yeah.

[33:45] Uh-huh.

[33:46] Face Keith Richards.

[33:47] Well, he's smashing up our office, mate.

[33:49] Yeah, and they're like,

[33:50] are we the ones, we're rock stars.

[33:52] Aren't we the ones who smash stuff up?

[33:54] Yeah.

[33:57] Get some wild horses in here to drag them away.

[33:59] Yeah.

[34:00] It's funny that you say wild horses

[34:01] because we cut to Jamie Lee Curtis

[34:04] teaching an aerobics class.

[34:06] To some horses.

[34:07] To, what is it?

[34:09] Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

[34:11] Yeah, man.

[34:12] Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

[34:12] The William Tell Overture, right?

[34:13] Yeah.

[34:14] Yes.

[34:15] Yeah, yeah.

[34:16] Which is hilarious.

[34:17] More hip thrusting.

[34:18] Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

[34:19] That one.

[34:20] So, he smashes the office, he calls her

[34:25] and tells her that he didn't do it

[34:28] and then she doesn't believe him

[34:30] and then he has to, he subpoenaed for the other case

[34:35] that we don't really understand what that's about.

[34:38] Yeah, he didn't surrender the interview

[34:41] he did with this guy into,

[34:43] he didn't give it to the magazine

[34:46] and the, I don't know, like the government demands it.

[34:50] Okay, well, thank God they rested so much

[34:52] of the plot on this thing they didn't release, right?

[34:54] Yeah, and then they hold him in contempt

[34:57] and he was like, I won't give these up

[35:00] because I gave my word

[35:01] and Jamie Lee Curtis is in the courtroom audience

[35:06] and sees him say that and then I guess she realizes

[35:08] that he didn't write the article

[35:10] and then they kiss, movie over.

[35:13] So, things are finally perfect for them at the end.

[35:16] Everything is perfect.

[35:17] And that muckraking rag, Rolling Stone,

[35:20] known for taking down aerobics as a thing, I guess.

[35:24] Aerobics and General Stanley McChrystal

[35:26] are the two things Rolling Stone took down, yeah.

[35:29] Yeah, well, should we?

[35:31] Any questions?

[35:32] Well, I mean, what's your final judgment?

[35:34] We usually do final judgment.

[35:34] What's your final judgment on this, Charlene?

[35:37] So, real quick, the final judgments for Miss That Movie

[35:40] are, wait, wait, glad we missed it.

[35:46] Sad we missed it or had to not miss it.

[35:51] We're gonna go back and watch it now.

[35:53] But I didn't miss it.

[35:54] Well, I think it's for us, I guess.

[35:56] It's for the others, for the others

[35:57] who did miss that movie, yeah.

[36:00] I mean, I've always been curious about this movie.

[36:02] I guess I had to not miss it.

[36:05] Someday I'll watch Perfect, probably.

[36:07] I feel like I'm glad I missed it.

[36:09] I feel like there's enough in it that it sounds bad,

[36:11] but it's not, your description would make me be like,

[36:13] I gotta see this thing.

[36:14] This sounds nuts, you know?

[36:17] Yeah, it's-

[36:17] I've seen the hip-thrusting scene.

[36:19] That's pretty good.

[36:20] Yeah, I feel like that's all you need to see

[36:21] is the hip-thrusting scene.

[36:22] Yeah, what do you guys say about it?

[36:23] You watched it.

[36:25] Is this, by glad we missed it,

[36:28] I'm saying I'm glad we did not watch it

[36:30] for the podcast for a normal episode.

[36:32] I don't necessarily think it would have been the most fun.

[36:37] Is it as good of a John Travolta movie

[36:40] as something like Blown Away or Look Who's Talking?

[36:44] Probably not, but it's somewhere in between.

[36:49] Blown Away?

[36:50] You mean Blow Out?

[36:51] Blow Out, goddammit.

[36:53] I get confused, guys.

[36:54] I dream too much.

[36:55] You're just thinking of that Nicole Eggert movie?

[36:57] Or the one with Tommy Lee Jones,

[36:58] there's two Blown Aways.

[36:59] No, I'm thinking of the Nicole Eggert one, Ellen, of course.

[37:03] Yeah, sorry, I was trying to give you some covers, too.

[37:04] No, it's the one with the Corys and Nicole Eggert.

[37:08] I don't know that one.

[37:09] Oh, okay, well-

[37:10] You were not Ellen?

[37:11] You were not Ellen.

[37:12] You were a boy at some point with Kate.

[37:14] I was never a 12-year-old boy.

[37:17] Yeah, I think that movie was, it was way too long

[37:21] and the whole idea of these people that wanna be perfect

[37:26] and that, like, what's so wrong with trying to be perfect

[37:29] in that whole, like, 80s kinda, you know,

[37:33] you have to look a certain way or, like, you can't hold-

[37:37] Go-go 80s.

[37:38] Yeah, yeah.

[37:39] With the go-gos.

[37:40] Yeah, I'm glad that we're kinda moving away from that.

[37:44] And do you think the movie needed the extra plot lines

[37:47] involving other stories and cases?

[37:50] Yeah, I don't think it needed that.

[37:51] I don't think so either.

[37:53] I think the movie thought, didn't know they needed it

[37:55] because they didn't really flesh it out.

[37:57] But they needed a two-hour runtime.

[37:59] Why?

[38:00] Because movie theaters want tons of people

[38:02] to come and sit for longer.

[38:04] Because they've already finished their popcorn.

[38:06] This is my guess, this is my guess.

[38:08] Saturday Night Fever, huge hit based on an article.

[38:11] That article, it turned out, was not really true.

[38:14] But huge movie based on an article about a fad

[38:17] that was going on, these people getting together

[38:19] and going to these discos.

[38:20] My guess, and that is a serious movie,

[38:23] even though people mostly remember the dancing from it.

[38:25] Yeah, yeah, no, it's very serious.

[38:27] My guess is they were like,

[38:28] this is John Travolta's Saturday Night Fever for the 80s.

[38:31] We're gonna do for the 80s what that did for the 70s.

[38:33] Yeah.

[38:34] Which they tried to, like, Tom Wolfe it

[38:35] and make it like this thing that is tied

[38:37] to all sorts of other stuff going on in the 1980s.

[38:40] Yeah.

[38:41] Yeah, except the story, there was no story there.

[38:43] And Saturday Night Fever had, yeah, definitely had a story.

[38:46] Characters, you know, stuff that you need for a movie.

[38:49] Yeah, exactly.

[38:50] Yeah, he didn't wear a shirt when he ate his spaghetti.

[38:52] I mean, that's a movie.

[38:53] He's interested in how much,

[38:56] whether the shoes on display fit him.

[38:58] That's what you need for a movie.

[39:00] Carrying paint around.

[39:01] Carrying paint around.

[39:02] Well, we missed that movie.

[39:04] We missed that movie.

[39:05] Do you want to land this plane, Stuart?

[39:07] Yeah, so I want to thank our producer, Alec Smith,

[39:12] and I would love to thank Charlene for being our guest.

[39:14] Do you want to give one final plug for Jiggle Studio?

[39:17] Jiggle Studio, support us.

[39:19] Okay.

[39:20] You did it.

[39:21] Okay, nailed it.

[39:22] So for The Flop House, I am Stuart Wellington.

[39:25] I've been Dan McCoy.

[39:26] I've been Ellie Kalen.

[39:28] And I'm Charlene Wellington.

[39:29] Okay, bye.

[39:32] Bye.

[39:38] Maximum fun.

[39:40] A worker-owned network.

[39:41] Of artists-owned shows.

[39:43] Supported.

[39:44] Directly.

[39:44] By you.

FH Mini 113 - Missed That Movie! - Perfect

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