The Flop House: Episode #24 - Prom Night

Dan McCoy

[0:00] Tonight on the Flophouse, we talk about Prom Night, the stabbingest night in a young girl's life.

[0:30] Hey everybody, welcome to the Flophouse. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kalin. Yay, we're all back together at the same time. The original Peaches, except not, because I was not original. I'd cross oceans of time for you guys. Oh, wow. Thanks, buddy. That's very nice. I got that from a movie, though. What movie?

Stuart Wellington

[0:59] I think Last of the Mohicans. Hmm. Well, Stuart, where have you been? I don't know, around, away on work, vacationing in California. Hmm. I hear that that's a bright and sunny place. You've been Californicationing. Yeah, hey, that's a show and a song. Now, I went to In-N-Out Burger a couple times, that was good, but then I saw Michael Cera on the street, who looks like a turtle. Like a baby turtle.

Elliott Kalan

[1:28] Not like a turtle. Yeah, not like a different type of turtle. Explain for Dan and the audience at home why Michael Cera looks like a different kind of turtle than Fisher Stevens.

Stuart Wellington

[1:36] It's hard to explain. There's something a little more sinister about the Fisher Stevens turtle. He'd be the evil turtle uncle in the Turtle King Disney cartoon, whereas Michael Cera would be our hero, who's just a baby turtle.

Elliott Kalan

[1:49] All right.

[1:50] Turtle-o, or something like that. Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[1:51] Shelly, or something like that.

[1:52] Shelly, I think that's a good one.

[1:53] Hey.

[1:53] Sheldon.

[1:54] Hey, dudes.

[1:55] Okay, what's up?

Dan McCoy

[1:56] I got news.

[1:58] Okay, cool.

[1:59] Lay it on us.

[1:59] It's October.

[2:01] Shocktober.

[2:01] Okay.

[2:02] Shocktober here at the Flophouse.

[2:04] That means we're watching only horror movies for the whole two episodes of the Flophouse.

[2:09] Oh, no.

Elliott Kalan

[2:10] When are we starting?

[2:11] We're starting tonight.

[2:13] October is much like the first 12 episodes of the Flophouse.

[2:18] Shut up.

Dan McCoy

[2:20] Maybe we like certain types of movies better.

[2:23] Okay, but...

[2:24] I'm to blame, if anybody.

[2:25] Yeah?

Stuart Wellington

[2:26] No, there's no...

[2:26] I like horror movies.

[2:27] Even good ones.

[2:31] Well, what did we watch tonight, though?

[2:33] Was it good?

[2:34] Well, I don't want to spoil it for anybody, but it was called Prom Night, Dan.

[2:38] Hmm.

[2:38] Prom Night, Dan.

[2:39] No, it was the movie, it was called Prom Night, and I was addressing Dan.

[2:44] Oh, I see.

[2:44] Now, Prom Night is a remake of another movie called Prom Night, I think.

[2:49] Although, I think Jamie Lee Curtis was in it.

[2:51] Is that the one with the zombie guy on the motorcycle with flames and shit, or is that Prom Night 2?

[2:56] No, you didn't have Ghost Rider.

[2:57] No.

Dan McCoy

[2:58] Okay, nice.

[2:59] I am thinking of Ghost Rider, actually.

[3:01] Prom Night was a 1980 film.

[3:04] It was made in Canada, and it looks it.

[3:08] And it has Leslie Nielsen playing Jamie Lee Curtis' dad back before he only made comedy spoof.

Elliott Kalan

[3:16] Before the career-defining hits Spy Hard and 2001 A Space Travesty.

[3:20] Right.

[3:21] And Mafia, right?

Dan McCoy

[3:22] He wasn't in that, though.

[3:23] No.

[3:24] It was one of Jamie Lee Curtis' Scream Queen films, along with Halloween, Halloween 2, Terror Train.

[3:31] Trading Places.

Stuart Wellington

[3:34] True Lies.

[3:35] Carpool.

[3:35] I've seen movies with her.

Dan McCoy

[3:37] Freaky Friday.

[3:38] Terrifying Freaky Friday.

[3:39] Blue Steel.

[3:40] But the movies are nothing alike.

[3:43] I mean, the thing about, briefly, Prom Night is a movie about some...

[3:47] Wait, which one?

[3:48] The original one.

[3:49] Okay.

[3:49] I'm already confused.

[3:50] A kid dies at the beginning of the movie.

[3:52] That's weird.

[3:53] And then, when they're teenagers, all the kids sort of responsible for that kid dying get picked off one by one.

Elliott Kalan

[4:01] So it's like Friday the 13th.

[4:03] Yeah.

[4:04] Yeah.

[4:04] But at a prom instead of a summer camp.

Stuart Wellington

[4:06] And the Friday the 13th isn't like the kids who did it are going to kill.

[4:09] No, that's true.

Elliott Kalan

[4:10] It's just kids who are acting out the same ethos and lack of care.

Stuart Wellington

[4:14] Right.

[4:15] It's kind of like Final Destination.

[4:18] Yeah.

[4:18] But instead of a death trying to kill people for avoiding some crazy death thing, it's, I don't know, revenge.

Dan McCoy

[4:27] But the weird thing about the original Prom Night is it's one of these movies where, okay, at the beginning, the accidental death of this child is witnessed by her brother.

[4:35] And you're like, oh, okay, the brother's probably the killer.

[4:39] But surely there'll be a twist in this movie.

[4:42] We'll think it's the brother, but it'll be someone else.

[4:45] Maybe it'll be Leslie Nielsen, in fact.

[4:48] But at the end of the film, the killer gets unmasked and, holy shit, it's the brother, as if that was going to be a surprise to us.

[4:55] Yeah, it was pretty crappy, if I recall.

[4:57] Yeah.

[4:57] And also there was a 15-minute segment towards the end where everyone disco dances.

Elliott Kalan

[5:04] That was called Pad Night.

[5:06] Yeah.

[5:06] Well, I mean, we have to face it.

Dan McCoy

[5:08] That has nothing to do with the updated Prom.

Elliott Kalan

[5:10] I think we can all agree the best horror movie that involves a prom that can be made has been made, and that was Carrie, in my opinion.

[5:18] Yeah.

[5:19] It's such a strong movie in terms of a teen story and then also a strong movie in terms of people getting all bloody at the end.

[5:28] And John Travolta kills a pig in it.

[5:31] You're not going to top that, I don't think.

[5:33] It's challenging.

Dan McCoy

[5:34] There's also Chud 2 Bud the Chud, which ends with a zombie prom.

[5:38] It's true.

[5:39] They're prombies.

[5:40] It's pretty good.

[5:41] It's pretty good.

Elliott Kalan

[5:42] But the end, of course, Teen Wolf has.

[5:44] I don't know if it's a prom or just a dance.

Stuart Wellington

[5:45] Teen Wolf is definitely a horror movie.

Dan McCoy

[5:49] About a ravening teenage wolf.

Elliott Kalan

[5:52] It's the story about a werewolf who plays basketball.

[5:57] I don't know what the problem is.

[5:58] It's terrifying.

Dan McCoy

[5:59] I would like to see a movie that wasn't even a werewolf.

[6:01] It was just like, oh, this wolf is 13.

Elliott Kalan

[6:05] Imagine being on the basketball court with that Teen Wolf.

[6:07] Well, I mean, that's kind of Ginger Snaps a little bit.

Dan McCoy

[6:09] Yeah, I guess that's true.

Stuart Wellington

[6:11] But genuinely imagine, if you had to play basketball against a werewolf, you'd be fucking frightened.

[6:15] I know.

Elliott Kalan

[6:16] Well, we've talked about this before, I think, how it's amazing that the other teams continued

[6:21] to play against the werewolf team and that the story never got out to the press.

[6:25] Because werewolf is one story, but basketball playing werewolf is a bigger story.

[6:30] Yeah, it's pretty open.

Dan McCoy

[6:31] I would imagine that that season just looked like a series of forfeits.

[6:37] Forfeit, forfeit, forfeit.

[6:38] Yeah, another winning season.

[6:42] Anyway, but the real prom night.

[6:44] Not the real prom.

[6:44] The werewolf is graduating.

Elliott Kalan

[6:45] Our basketball team is going to go downhill fast.

[6:48] Quick, glue these carpet samples on.

[6:52] We'll tell them we have a new werewolf on the team.

[6:55] Yeah.

[6:56] Teen Wolf 3, not a wolf.

Dan McCoy

[6:58] But anyway, the prom night we watched tonight was the 2007 prom night, I guess.

[7:05] Was it released?

[7:05] Or was it released early this year?

[7:07] It might even be 2008.

[7:08] I don't know.

[7:08] It might be like a February graveyard release where they just dump everything.

Stuart Wellington

[7:12] I think it was just before the end of the year because they were probably trying to get

[7:15] it into consideration for the Oscars.

[7:17] That makes sense.

Elliott Kalan

[7:18] I would have assumed that they would release it around June or May when proms are happening.

[7:23] Or around Halloween.

Stuart Wellington

[7:25] When scary things happen.

[7:27] When death stalks the silver screen.

Elliott Kalan

[7:31] When for one glorious night people go crazy and start worshipping monsters and death.

Dan McCoy

[7:35] Yeah, but I think that they released it in March when shitty things happened.

[7:39] I think that was the theme that they were capitalizing on.

Elliott Kalan

[7:41] If it's March, shitty things.

[7:43] It's either prom night comes out or Julius Caesar gets assassinated.

[7:46] It was a crappy month.

Dan McCoy

[7:48] Oh, but God.

[7:49] This movie did not skimp on the prom, though.

[7:52] That's one thing.

Elliott Kalan

[7:52] It skimped on the plot, the character development, the gore, and the excitement.

[7:57] But there was a ton of prom.

Dan McCoy

[7:59] Yeah, this movie is slightly less than 90 minutes.

[8:03] Yeah.

[8:03] Probably 88 minutes.

Elliott Kalan

[8:06] And it's slightly less than a satisfying experience.

Dan McCoy

[8:09] And 10 minutes into the movie, they arrive at prom.

[8:12] Yep.

[8:13] And what a prom.

Elliott Kalan

[8:14] Yeah, and the prom itself is insane.

[8:16] It looks like the set of MTV's The Grind, I guess.

Dan McCoy

[8:19] But most horror movies where it's based around an event, there's a build to the event.

[8:24] The event happens like 40 minutes into the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[8:27] Well, going back to Carrie, the prom happens like an hour and a half into the film.

[8:31] It's the climax of the movie.

Dan McCoy

[8:33] Basically, what happens is at the beginning, there's one of those horror movie beginnings

[8:36] when one or two killings get out of the way right up front.

[8:40] We've got to fill a quota.

[8:42] Maybe people think that they're in the wrong film.

[8:44] Someone doesn't get killed immediately, and they're going to walk out of the theater.

[8:48] So this girl's family gets killed.

Stuart Wellington

[8:50] Including a little kid, which was pretty awesome.

[8:55] Although, altogether, very bloodless.

[8:57] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[8:59] They're stabbed to death, but it's kind of like they're stabbed to death with a knife that

[9:03] sprays out an invisible ink that covers up blood, like DD7 or something.

Dan McCoy

[9:07] Yeah, that's the thing.

[9:08] Maybe it's just like a poison ice pick.

[9:10] They're like, there's a really small entry wound, and they die, and that's it.

Stuart Wellington

[9:13] Because this entire movie labors under the belief that the human body actually doesn't

[9:18] have very much blood, and to cause a lethal wound to somebody, it doesn't actually involve

[9:22] very much blood at all.

Elliott Kalan

[9:23] The human body holds like a cup of blood, basically.

Stuart Wellington

[9:25] Yeah, in general, the people that are killed in this movie are killed from internal wounds

[9:29] that you can't really tell.

[9:30] You're like, why did that guy die?

[9:31] That's not very much blood.

Elliott Kalan

[9:32] Well, I imagine they're all hemophiliacs, and the blood is all, yeah, they're all bleeding

[9:35] internally.

Stuart Wellington

[9:35] And also, the killer is like a fucking samurai, because every time he kills somebody, there's

[9:40] not a single drop of blood on him.

[9:41] Or on the ground.

Elliott Kalan

[9:42] He can move without making a noise.

[9:44] He can travel through mirrors and shadows.

[9:47] And he's good at everything.

[9:49] It helps that, we'll get to this, I guess, but every other character in the movie is incompetent.

[9:52] You're describing a much more exciting killer than that actually was.

[9:54] I know.

[9:54] In this case, he's just kind of an emotionless guy who appears behind people and then kills

[9:59] them.

Dan McCoy

[10:00] Yeah.

[10:00] But, alright, so he's a teacher.

[10:02] He's obsessed with this girl.

[10:03] He kills her family.

Elliott Kalan

[10:04] Kills her family because he loves her, and he wants to take her away.

Dan McCoy

[10:07] She's put away.

[10:08] Then we flash forward into the future.

[10:10] Three years.

[10:11] Not like the far future.

[10:13] Yeah, she hasn't changed.

[10:14] She doesn't go to a space prom.

[10:15] Much like in the Bratz movie.

[10:16] It's not Logan's room.

[10:17] Yeah.

[10:18] And much like in the Bratz movie, she looks exactly the same.

[10:21] Yeah.

[10:21] Three years in the future.

Elliott Kalan

[10:23] She's gone from about probably the age of 14 to 17, let's say.

[10:27] No love of she is.

[10:27] And she looks exactly the same.

[10:28] Not a time when people change.

Dan McCoy

[10:30] Yeah.

[10:30] And ten minutes into the movie, we are in a limo going to prom.

[10:34] And that's all the setup you need.

[10:36] She probably likes the same rock bands as she used to.

[10:39] Yes.

[10:40] And the killer is this teacher who's obsessed with her.

[10:43] And that's one thing that this does share with the original prom night is that there is no mystery as to who's killing.

[10:50] You're like, oh, this guy's killing.

[10:53] She'll probably think that he's back later on, but it's going to turn out to be someone else.

[10:58] Like, that's just going to be a red herring.

[11:00] No, it's the same guy.

Elliott Kalan

[11:01] Although, I mean, they play it straight.

[11:02] They don't try to make it a mystery.

[11:04] He is.

[11:04] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[11:05] I know, but it's the most boring.

[11:06] Okay, this is a teacher who's obsessed with her, and thus that means he kills people.

[11:12] Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Elliott Kalan

[11:13] Wait, just because that information is thrown out to us in a conversation between two policemen who we have not seen before and can't do their jobs properly,

[11:21] and then more exposition is piled on top of it, you're saying it's not exciting or dramatically interesting?

Stuart Wellington

[11:26] Wait, wait, wait.

[11:26] Maybe I didn't follow the movie very correctly.

[11:29] The killer didn't have a beard, but the teacher had a beard.

Elliott Kalan

[11:33] Here's another problem.

[11:34] So the teacher was captured, put in a mental hospital, and then I guess they shaved his beard and his head because of the lice problems.

Dan McCoy

[11:41] Let's make it clear that the killer initially looked like Charles Manson.

[11:45] This is a high school teacher.

[11:47] Or Jim Cavizio in Cash, Mother Christ.

Stuart Wellington

[11:49] Yeah, like everybody's high school teacher.

[11:50] But he looks like a crazy bum killer.

Elliott Kalan

[11:53] Yeah, like everybody's high school gym teacher or science teacher.

[11:56] He looks like he crawled out from under the boardwalk and then got to class, taught you, and then went to a crack house.

Dan McCoy

[12:03] And then hung out with Brian Wilson and killed a bunch of people.

Elliott Kalan

[12:06] But he gets into a men's hospital.

[12:10] They shave off his crazy hair and beard, and he escapes looking like a shorn person.

[12:16] But the cops, the picture they're working off of is still his mugshot from three years ago with the hair and the beard.

[12:22] And every time they show it to people, they're like, no, haven't seen this guy.

Stuart Wellington

[12:26] Haven't seen that guy wearing the ski mask and the cowboy hat.

Dan McCoy

[12:30] Yeah, I was saying that I wanted, like there's a point at which one of the teens sees and is like, there's something about that guy that rings a bell.

[12:38] And I wanted a scene where she somehow gets like.

[12:41] Was that Columbo?

[12:42] Yeah.

[12:44] I just want more things.

[12:46] But I wanted a scene where she somehow got a hold of a photo of the guy, and then she like drew like a beard on him and a mustache.

[12:53] And I'm like, holy shit.

[12:55] Or like some like novelty, like mustache and beard sticker like got put on that.

[13:00] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[13:01] The picture actually falls into a wooly-willy magnet and metal shavings toy.

[13:06] And she arranges the beard around it.

Stuart Wellington

[13:08] Or she's standing across a crowded room from the guy.

[13:11] The guy turns toward her and somebody else hands like a phony beard and mustache to a friend across her line of vision.

[13:19] She's behind a plate glass window.

[13:22] For a moment.

Dan McCoy

[13:22] Some joker's like, look what happens when I draw.

[13:25] Looks like that guy's a mustache and a beard.

[13:27] Wait a minute.

Elliott Kalan

[13:28] He enters a Manson look-alike contest and puts on a fake beard.

[13:32] Has there ever been a joke in a TV show where there's a police sketch artist using a wooly-willy to put together sketches of criminals?

[13:40] I think so.

[13:41] It sounds like it.

[13:42] That's a funny joke.

Stuart Wellington

[13:42] It sounds like a family guy joke.

Elliott Kalan

[13:43] Yeah, you're right.

[13:44] Now I hate it.

[13:46] Burn.

[13:47] But she goes to prom.

[13:48] Killer gets there and takes his sweet time murdering about eight or nine people.

Dan McCoy

[13:51] Yeah, I bet that she has some really like unique and interesting friends, Elliot.

[13:54] I bet that there's like a-

[13:56] Well, let me tell you about these exciting friends that we meet right away.

Elliott Kalan

[13:58] There's her black friend and her white friend and each of them has a boyfriend and she has a boyfriend too.

[14:05] Huh.

Dan McCoy

[14:06] So do they have any hobbies or-

Elliott Kalan

[14:08] Well, the one couple wants to have sex and the other couple, the boyfriend's mad because the girlfriend is going to school far away from them.

Stuart Wellington

[14:16] Yeah, that seems to be one of their interests, Dan.

[14:18] They're interested in talking about what's going to happen in the future.

[14:21] And the main couple talks about how great their relationship is and how much they love each other.

[14:25] Yeah, so that's two hobbies, loving each other and being interested in the future.

Dan McCoy

[14:30] All right, to be fair, I guess that they do have some characteristics.

[14:33] One of the guys-

[14:34] Yeah, one's black.

[14:35] The other two are white.

[14:35] Drinks a lot.

[14:36] Yeah, he does.

[14:36] Yeah, the one guy drinks a lot.

[14:38] And then the black guy wants to propose to his girlfriend.

[14:42] Yeah, we found that out.

Elliott Kalan

[14:42] Although that's a throwaway moment.

Dan McCoy

[14:43] Even though they're like in high school.

Elliott Kalan

[14:46] And there's no foreshadowing for that.

[14:47] Yeah.

[14:48] They seem like they kind of got thrown together in a couple because they're the only two black students in the class.

[14:52] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[14:53] Well, and that's why he wants a merrier because he doesn't realize there's other black females.

[14:57] Outside of the town of Bridgeport in which this takes place.

[15:00] Yeah, Bridgeport, the town of one amazing hotel and nothing else.

Elliott Kalan

[15:04] One astounding hotel that's like 100,000 stories tall and every room is a suite with expensive furnishings.

[15:12] And the prom has giant searchlights outside and a huge ballroom with a giant screen and they're on a glowing platform floor.

Dan McCoy

[15:20] Well, I mean-

[15:21] They sold a lot of band candy.

Elliott Kalan

[15:23] And yet there's like five cops in the town and they're all fucking sucky at their job.

Stuart Wellington

[15:27] Well, that's all the funding in the town goes directly to the hotel.

[15:31] And the thing is, Elliot-

[15:32] This hotel gets a lot of subsidies for the town government.

Elliott Kalan

[15:35] See, there's an interesting story in there that the mayor owns the hotel.

[15:39] He's been embezzling all this money from the town to the hotel.

[15:42] The hotel is going bankrupt.

[15:44] They can't even finish construction on it.

[15:45] Remember?

[15:46] Yeah, absolutely.

[15:46] Because she runs into that part that's not finished yet.

[15:48] It's filled with doves.

[15:49] Yeah, it's filled with doves.

[15:51] And then like the story with-

[15:53] Like there were a lot of side characters that could have been more interesting.

[15:55] There was a lesbian gym teacher who was the only chaperone at the prom.

[15:59] There's this imaginary mayor we haven't gotten into.

[16:01] Sure.

Dan McCoy

[16:02] There's two policemen who are named Hicks and Stryker that only briefly appear.

Elliott Kalan

[16:07] But I wish the movie was about them.

[16:09] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[16:09] Like why Stryker decided to go into the Bridgeport police force instead of the special forces.

[16:14] Maybe he was in the special forces or the French foreign legion.

Elliott Kalan

[16:17] And for some reason he either had to leave or he chose to leave.

[16:20] Absolutely.

Stuart Wellington

[16:20] He saw one too many alien killings and like he just had to get out of that line of work.

Elliott Kalan

[16:25] And Hicks is either like a goofball or a real dedicated cop who respects the other guy's covert training.

[16:32] But at the same time he's envious of it.

[16:34] Sure.

[16:34] So he disrespects him.

[16:35] He tries to one up him.

Dan McCoy

[16:36] Yeah.

[16:37] This is a movie you could make, Elliot.

[16:38] Like the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead of Prom Knight.

[16:42] Of Prom Knight?

Elliott Kalan

[16:42] Oh, that sounds good.

[16:43] Hey.

Dan McCoy

[16:44] Hicks and Stryker.

[16:44] It's so great but there's a whole story about these two minor characters.

[16:49] What about them?

Stuart Wellington

[16:49] It's like Family Matters to Perfect Strangers.

[16:52] That sort of thing.

[16:53] Now, the whole thing about the Prom is like in the featurette, the making of featurette we just watched.

[16:57] It explains how like the Prom in this movie is like everybody else's Prom like times ten.

[17:03] It's a fantasy Prom.

[17:04] Just like how the teacher's beard was like your high school teacher's beard.

[17:09] Bigger.

[17:10] Absolutely.

[17:11] Like to the next level.

[17:12] That's how I viewed the teacher's beard and hair.

Elliott Kalan

[17:14] Okay.

[17:15] That makes sense.

[17:15] Well, it's interesting because they made it sound like it was supposed to be a very over-the-top like purposely exaggerated movie but you never get that feeling watching the movie.

[17:23] It just feels like a –

Dan McCoy

[17:24] It just feels unrealistic.

[17:25] Yeah.

[17:25] And it's just like the ages of the students.

Elliott Kalan

[17:26] It doesn't feel Fellini-esque or anything.

Dan McCoy

[17:29] It's like Moulin Rouge or something.

Stuart Wellington

[17:30] Yeah.

[17:31] It's the ages of the students.

[17:32] Like the ages of the students at your prom plus ten.

Dan McCoy

[17:36] Well, for instance, the main character's boyfriend played by Jason Street of Friday Night Lights.

[17:42] Absolutely.

[17:43] I don't know what that actor's name is but we'll call him Jason Street.

Stuart Wellington

[17:46] Did he go to that high school?

[17:47] I think you said he was like the son of a landscaper.

Elliott Kalan

[17:50] No, that was my explanation for why a guy that old was dating a high school son.

Dan McCoy

[17:54] Yeah, he's clearly like 28, 30, 32.

Stuart Wellington

[18:00] 47, 60.

[18:02] Yeah.

[18:02] 65.

[18:03] He's listening to his agent.

[18:05] He believes he can still play, what, 17, 18?

Elliott Kalan

[18:09] You know, I've been told I can play anywhere from 17 to 32.

[18:12] No, you should stick to it.

[18:13] That's a pretty good range.

Dan McCoy

[18:14] He sells it better on Friday Night Lights.

[18:15] I don't know whether it's the wheelchair or what.

[18:17] Yeah, it's because he's paralyzed.

[18:18] Paralyzed people have old faces.

[18:19] They seem younger.

[18:21] They've been through a lot.

[18:23] But, so yeah, a bunch of really sort of interchangeable characters.

[18:28] Sure.

[18:28] Go to the prom.

[18:30] And I think it's really interesting the way that they each get killed off because the

[18:33] way this movie has been constructed, there's no reason for the killer to kill anyone except

[18:38] for the girl he's obsessed with.

Stuart Wellington

[18:39] But why is he even trying to kill her?

Elliott Kalan

[18:41] I thought he loved her.

[18:42] Well, he wants her to come with him and he's going to kill her if he can't get her, I think.

[18:45] Oh, okay.

[18:46] It's a very complicated pathology.

[18:48] Oh, that makes sense.

[18:48] The ones you shouldn't hurt at all.

[18:50] That's why I've been doing that.

[18:52] That's why I've been hurting my girlfriend so much.

Dan McCoy

[18:55] That's why they're those corpses.

Elliott Kalan

[18:57] But, like, the way the movie is structured is the killer hides in their hotel room.

[19:00] Right.

[19:01] And they, one by one, go up to the room and he kills them.

[19:04] Like a Venus flytrap.

[19:05] Yeah, exactly.

[19:06] Except less exciting.

Dan McCoy

[19:07] It's like an Abbott and Costello sort of set up.

[19:10] So are you suggesting that if...

[19:11] One by one, they go into the dark room.

[19:13] Like, whoa!

[19:13] Thunk.

[19:15] Are you suggesting that...

Elliott Kalan

[19:15] Is that you, Abbott?

[19:17] You must have gone to this room.

[19:18] What?

[19:18] It's so dark in here.

Stuart Wellington

[19:19] Thunk.

[19:20] Yeah.

[19:20] So are you putting forward that video renters or people who use Netflix or whatever should,

[19:25] instead of renting this movie, just go out and buy a Venus flytrap and watch that for

[19:30] 88 minutes.

[19:30] That, I guarantee, will be more...

Elliott Kalan

[19:32] Even if you don't have flies in the area.

[19:33] Or sea monkeys.

Dan McCoy

[19:35] I mean, that doesn't...

[19:35] They don't kill anything, but they also...

[19:37] They do if you train them.

[19:40] Those are guard sea monkeys, Elliot.

[19:41] Oh, those are different, yeah.

[19:43] Yeah, so people get killed.

Elliott Kalan

[19:43] I was thinking of military-trained monkeys that wear flippers and dive with Navy SEALs

[19:48] and everything.

[19:50] Work with Navy Frogmen.

Dan McCoy

[19:51] You were thinking of the 96 Sea Monkeys unit.

Stuart Wellington

[19:55] Now, one of the things that I really loved about this movie, in addition to the complete

[19:58] lack of gore, because...

[20:00] Yeah, that was a PG-13 horror movie.

[20:02] This was like...

[20:02] Well, it was unrated.

[20:04] The DVD box said unrated.

[20:05] Said unrated.

Elliott Kalan

[20:06] But by unrated, they meant like, it wasn't gruesome enough to get a rating.

[20:09] Like, it didn't even get a G rating.

[20:11] Nice.

[20:12] But it's like a horror movie that, like, Howie Mandel directed.

[20:15] Like, he was afraid of getting his hands dirty the whole time.

[20:18] Like Little Monsters?

[20:19] We didn't even direct that.

[20:20] We didn't direct that, but he's in it.

[20:21] He should have.

Dan McCoy

[20:22] Yeah.

[20:23] All I remember about Little Monsters is the monster pees into something and pretends

[20:28] it's apple juice.

[20:28] Yeah, but it's...

[20:29] And they give it to the...

[20:30] Cat food for tuna fish.

Elliott Kalan

[20:31] Is there a scene in that where, like, something pulls Fred Savage's pants down or something

[20:35] like that?

[20:36] Probably.

[20:36] I remember as a kid seeing that in a commercial and being like, that's inappropriate.

[20:39] Yeah, no.

Dan McCoy

[20:39] That movie, I watched it growing up on HBO.

[20:42] I'm like, this is...

[20:43] Like, even as a kid, I'm like, this is a deeply perverse children's film.

[20:46] Yeah, there's a lot of...

[20:47] This is dirty feeling.

Stuart Wellington

[20:48] I watched that movie on VHS as a kid and I was like, why wasn't this released in theaters?

Dan McCoy

[20:53] It's great.

[20:55] Monsters live in your bed.

[20:56] Like the Garbage Pail Kids movie.

[20:57] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[20:58] Oh, that's it.

[20:59] That's its own horrible thing.

Stuart Wellington

[21:01] In addition to complete lack of gore, which I think I've mentioned a couple times, is the

[21:05] police work.

[21:07] Luckily, the police work is really abysmal.

[21:09] Crack police team.

[21:09] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[21:10] As they say in the making of, they combine so many different genres, as he says.

[21:15] Because genres rounds with a hard J sound, apparently.

[21:19] It's a police procedural.

[21:22] It's a killer on the loose movie.

[21:23] It's a teen movie.

[21:24] And as a police procedural, it fails on every level because the police have no procedure.

[21:30] It's just kind of like, bleh, eh, I guess, well, there's a killer on the loose.

[21:33] I guess we'll hang around a while.

Dan McCoy

[21:34] Well, they learn that the guy escaped.

[21:36] They learn that the guy escaped like three days before prom or whatever.

[21:39] Sure.

[21:39] And they don't inform anyone.

[21:40] But they were so caught up in prom madness to really worry about it.

[21:44] And then their solution is like, okay, this guy's probably going to track down this girl.

[21:48] We're going to go to prom.

[21:49] We're not going to reveal our presence at prom.

[21:51] And we're going to watch from the sidelines.

[21:53] We're going to hang around.

Elliott Kalan

[21:54] I think really what happened is that he didn't get to go to prom when he was a kid.

[21:57] So he's like, I'm going to stop this killer.

[22:00] And then he saw prom was going on.

[22:01] He was like, you know, I never had the things I had kids had.

[22:03] What a magical time.

[22:05] So this is what prom is like.

Stuart Wellington

[22:06] You know, yeah.

[22:07] I feel like a prince.

[22:10] I think part of it, though, was after they found out everybody had already left for prom.

[22:15] So he went and talked to the girl's aunt and uncle who the girl was living with.

[22:18] Donna, I believe, was the character.

[22:19] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[22:19] The aunt dropped a big plate because she was so horrified.

[22:22] Yeah.

[22:22] Who called that?

[22:23] Was that you, Dan?

[22:24] Dan called that.

[22:24] Good job.

Stuart Wellington

[22:25] And then he was like, yeah, you know, this killer's probably on the loose.

[22:27] He's probably going to go kill Donna.

[22:29] They're like, I don't know if we should interrupt prom.

[22:31] I mean, it's a big time of a girl's life.

Elliott Kalan

[22:33] Yeah, there's a conversation between the aunt and uncle later where the aunt is like, you're

[22:35] the one who didn't want her to, didn't think we should take her back home.

[22:39] And I don't remember what his rationale for it was.

[22:41] It was something like, well, it's prom night.

Dan McCoy

[22:43] Yeah.

[22:43] Also, I just want to point out.

[22:45] Memories last forever.

[22:46] The aunt played by the coach's sister on Friday Night Lights.

[22:51] And the two cops are characters from The Wire, Stringer Bell and Ziggy.

[22:56] So there's a whole Friday Night Lights, The Wire thing going on here.

[23:01] But I would recommend that you watch those two television programs rather than watching the

Elliott Kalan

[23:04] It means as bad as this movie is, the people who made it have good taste in television.

Dan McCoy

[23:08] Yeah.

[23:08] They're like, oh, these are fine actors.

[23:10] Maybe they'll elevate this.

Elliott Kalan

[23:12] The same way where even if I was making like a bikini car wash type movie, I would hire a

[23:17] lot of actors that I like, you know, from old television shows and stuff to give them work.

[23:22] I really like bikini car wash.

[23:23] Kevin O'Rourke from Remember When?

[23:26] I've got a role for you.

[23:27] Come on down, you know.

[23:29] Todd Barry?

[23:30] I'd love to have you in this.

[23:31] And he's not really a TV actor, but, you know.

Dan McCoy

[23:33] So, but the cops, Stringer Bell and Ziggy, the cops, they go to prom, they hang out, they

[23:39] lurk.

[23:40] They don't tell anyone.

[23:41] They look creepy.

Elliott Kalan

[23:42] They look creepy.

[23:43] They're two adults hanging around prom just watching.

Stuart Wellington

[23:45] Although, arguably, the one adult looks about the same age as the kids except he has a mustache.

[23:51] He has the beginnings of a mustache.

Dan McCoy

[23:53] So they keep their eye on like the main girl until one point when like Ziggy comes in.

[23:57] He's like, oh, there's something in the parking lot you got to see.

[24:00] And they go out and they look at a corpse in the trunk of a car.

[24:04] Of the killer's car, I assume.

[24:05] Yeah.

[24:06] And that's when the girl leaves.

[24:07] And I'm like, can't the guy just tell him?

[24:09] I was like, oh, I found a corpse in the car.

[24:11] Someone's definitely here.

[24:13] Now's the time to remove this girl from prom.

Stuart Wellington

[24:15] He was waiting to get a really good picture of the guy's reaction for like some kind of a

[24:19] police bloopers.

[24:21] For the holiday party.

[24:22] He was really trying to get him to do a split take or something.

[24:24] Now we got to paste this on your locker.

Dan McCoy

[24:27] He's like, I put a delicious banana split for you in the trunk.

[24:31] There am I sure.

Elliott Kalan

[24:32] If I could tell a brief story about policemen's lockers.

[24:36] I remember as a Cub Scout going on a tour of the local police station.

[24:41] And the police officer is showing us around the building and everything.

[24:44] And he takes us to the locker room and opens up his locker to show us his gear.

[24:49] And inside there's a Polaroid of him sitting in a chair and a stripper hanging her naked

[24:54] boobs over his head.

[24:56] And he was, and I just, I remember him turning to, like trying to ignore that it was there.

[25:00] And then turning to the den mother who had brought us on the store and being like, that was a

[25:03] bachelor party for one of the other policemen.

Dan McCoy

[25:06] I like that he turns to her, he explains to her, he's ignoring the fact that you're there.

[25:12] That we can all see it.

[25:14] I feel like I need to apologize to you, the adult.

[25:18] So what are you doing later?

Stuart Wellington

[25:19] I mean, yeah, that's an awesome story.

[25:22] Thank you.

Elliott Kalan

[25:23] That didn't happen in this movie, sadly.

[25:24] No, I haven't thought about that experience in probably 11 years.

[25:28] So, you know.

Dan McCoy

[25:29] Flop House brings memory back.

[25:30] It does, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[25:31] It's like, this is my remembrance of things past.

[25:35] Prom night is my, you know, whatever, is it, Madeline?

[25:38] Yeah.

[25:38] Prom night.

[25:39] Oh, but so the police are, so they stand around and look in the body in the trunk for about

[25:43] 30 minutes.

[25:44] Sure.

[25:44] And then the killer kills people and Donna gets something and then he's chasing.

Dan McCoy

[25:50] The one girl, I hate to just like keep identifying her by race.

[25:55] Lisa.

[25:55] But the thing is, like, they have identifying her characteristics.

Elliott Kalan

[25:57] You can remember her because the African-American girl in this had the same name, Lisa, as the

[26:01] African-American character in Saved by the Bell.

[26:04] Yeah.

[26:05] Played by Lark Voorhees.

[26:06] Sure.

[26:06] So Lisa, like.

[26:07] I assume her last name was Turtle, just like Lisa Turtle in Saved by the Bell.

Stuart Wellington

[26:10] Yeah, I watched a bunch of Saved by the Bell at College Years while I was on my vacation

[26:14] recently.

[26:15] Not as good.

[26:16] No.

[26:17] And that's saying something.

[26:17] Saved by the Bell is a terrible show.

[26:20] Well, we can agree to disagree.

[26:22] Let's go on.

Dan McCoy

[26:23] But Lisa runs off.

[26:25] She realizes who the guy is and she runs off and she gets attacked by him and she runs,

[26:31] as Stuart alluded to earlier, she runs into an area of the hotel that is just exposed

[26:37] wooden beams and plastic sheeting.

[26:41] And, I mean, this is like a luxury hotel.

Elliott Kalan

[26:43] Some sort of lighting that kind of fades on and off.

[26:46] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[26:47] Apparently they're not finished building it and they haven't blocked off that part of the

[26:51] hotel.

[26:51] Yeah, it's easily accessible for the patrons.

Elliott Kalan

[26:52] And there were no deleted scenes on the DVD about how the hotel was having trouble finishing

[26:56] construction.

Dan McCoy

[26:57] Yeah.

[26:58] Basically, she just, the killer just was like, I'm going to chase you into the spooky area

[27:02] of the hotel.

[27:03] That's my MO.

Elliott Kalan

[27:04] The best part of that is he chases her into the spooky area and then her boyfriend who's

[27:09] looking for her, the elevator doors open at an area of the hotel that patrons should be

[27:14] allowed in that they happen to be in and there's no reason he should know they're in there.

[27:18] And he goes, Lisa!

[27:20] Lisa?

[27:22] Yeah, she's not here.

[27:23] And the door's closed.

[27:24] And then he goes somewhere else.

[27:26] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[27:26] Stupid.

[27:27] Well, and that's for that moment where she's like, should I call out?

[27:30] But if I do, I might get stabbed by the killer.

[27:32] Like, it was that tension they were looking for.

[27:34] And frankly, they achieved it.

Elliott Kalan

[27:35] I gotta tell you, the killer, the one time that he didn't prove himself to me was when

[27:40] he's chasing her down the stairs and her shoe broke and she fell down.

[27:44] That was unfair.

[27:45] Yeah.

[27:45] He had nothing to do with that.

[27:47] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[27:47] Maybe he did have something to do with it.

Elliott Kalan

[27:49] Maybe he cut her heel a little bit.

[27:51] While she was making out with her boyfriend, he was just slicing away slightly at the heel

[27:55] with his magic knife that he uses to do everything with.

[27:58] Yep.

Dan McCoy

[27:59] So, but anyway, once they realize that people are getting killed, finally, finally the cops

[28:03] spring into action.

Stuart Wellington

[28:03] Where did he get that knife, by the way?

[28:05] He had it when he was in the insane asylum.

Elliott Kalan

[28:08] Yeah, he must have smuggled it in his rectum or something.

[28:10] Did he make it?

Stuart Wellington

[28:11] I like to think he would.

[28:12] That looked like a Leatherman professional knife.

Elliott Kalan

Stuart Wellington

[28:15] He's pretty adept at doing things.

[28:17] He was a high school teacher.

Elliott Kalan

[28:19] You're saying he did teach a knife making class.

[28:21] Yep.

[28:21] So you're saying this is like Rambo and each time he goes out on a mission, he makes a

[28:24] new knife for it.

Dan McCoy

[28:26] Yeah, but no, but finally the cops spring into action.

[28:29] They, um...

Elliott Kalan

[28:30] The cops lurch...

Dan McCoy

[28:32] Lurch slightly.

[28:33] Slightly into action.

Stuart Wellington

[28:34] They call a bunch of guys with mustaches and SWAT gear from the next town over.

[28:38] They evacuate the hotel.

Elliott Kalan

[28:39] I like to believe that they're just guys who are at a costume party dressed as SWAT guys.

Dan McCoy

[28:43] They take the girl away.

[28:46] They send one cop with her and they don't take the girl to the police precinct.

[28:51] They allow her to go home.

Elliott Kalan

[28:52] They take her home.

[28:53] And then the cop who's supposed to be keeping the house secure sits in his car while everyone

[28:59] else is in the house.

[29:00] And he just keeps rubbing his ear and like, you know, and the other cop calls him and is

[29:05] like, you got to check in on them.

[29:07] No, the area's secure.

[29:08] Check in on them.

[29:09] And you kind of get the idea that in previous cases, this guy has refused to get out of

[29:13] his car.

[29:14] Like he knows that it's a habit of his to just sit in his car and not doing anything.

Dan McCoy

[29:17] It's a nice car.

[29:18] It's got heated seats.

[29:19] He's got one of those beaded things that massage you when you drive.

[29:23] Cup holder.

[29:24] He's got a PSP.

Stuart Wellington

[29:26] In the car?

[29:27] Yeah.

[29:27] Built into the car?

[29:28] Yeah.

[29:28] Well, no.

[29:29] He brought it.

[29:29] It's in the glove box.

[29:30] And he pulls it out and plays whatever video games kids play nowadays.

[29:33] Or cops.

[29:34] A bubble bobble, I think.

[29:35] Sure.

[29:36] Yep.

[29:37] Bionic Commando.

[29:38] Yeah.

[29:39] Dig Dirt.

[29:39] River City Anthem.

[29:41] Dig Dirt.

[29:43] They're all playing a boy in his blob.

[29:47] Maniac Mansion.

[29:49] You want to get into this game?

[29:50] You want to name one of them?

[29:51] Let's name some more.

[29:52] Sure.

[29:52] Okay.

[29:53] Name.

[29:54] Kesar.

[29:56] Mega Man X2.

[29:57] Nice.

[29:58] So the thing is, like, I think the reason he stayed in his car is because...

[30:01] Marvel Man...

[30:02] Oh, you said moment.

[30:02] There were at least, like, four or five scenes where somebody's like,

[30:08] Hey.

[30:08] Hey, buddy, friend.

[30:10] And walk over to the person.

[30:11] Like, are you asleep?

[30:12] Lift up the person's head.

Dan McCoy

[30:13] Oh, my God.

[30:14] They're neck slashed.

Elliott Kalan

[30:15] I kept thinking of the trailer that Eli Roth made for Grindhouse for the Thanksgiving movie

[30:21] where, like, she's kissing the guy and it's just a head.

[30:24] And she goes down on another guy.

[30:27] And she looks up and his head falls off.

[30:29] Like, it was that kind of thing where, like, it was ridiculous.

Stuart Wellington

[30:32] There's no way that, like...

[30:33] First of all, I would imagine a neck wound would bleed a lot.

[30:37] Like, I haven't seen anybody who's had their neck slashed.

[30:40] There's a thing called arterial spray, though.

[30:41] It's one of the major arteries in your body.

[30:44] Yeah, so a lot of blood would get everywhere.

[30:47] Like, I don't think it would be, like, just artful, like, hey, let's spray a little blood here.

Dan McCoy

[30:50] It would be, like, all over the place.

[30:52] Well, he soaks his knife in liquid nitrogen before cutting people with it.

Elliott Kalan

[30:57] He soaks his knife in a coagulant so that the people clot almost instantly.

Dan McCoy

[31:02] He's...

[31:02] It's kind of like a lightsaber, though.

[31:03] He's sort of like an OCD kind of...

[31:05] Yeah, it...

[31:06] Cauterizes.

Elliott Kalan

[31:06] Cauterizes.

[31:07] Cauterizes thing.

[31:07] I couldn't remember the word.

[31:09] Nice.

[31:09] Professional writer.

[31:10] Can't remember the word cauterize.

Stuart Wellington

[31:11] Come here, Stuart.

[31:12] Cauterize.

[31:12] Yeah.

[31:13] Yeah.

[31:13] Boom.

[31:14] Daily Show sucks.

[31:15] All of our cauterization jokes.

Elliott Kalan

[31:18] I'm such a hypocrite.

[31:20] But, yeah, there are a lot of scenes where people don't realize there's a dead body.

[31:24] She's hiding under a bed at one point as the killer looks for her, and she's under the

[31:28] bed for about two minutes and then looks over and notices there's a dead body centimeters

[31:32] away from her.

[31:33] Yeah.

[31:34] Yeah.

[31:34] Like, looking at her.

Stuart Wellington

[31:35] I don't know about you guys, but every time I duck under a bed when I'm avoiding a killer,

[31:39] I check pretty clearly if there's another killer down there.

[31:41] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[31:41] Because you want room to stretch out.

Stuart Wellington

[31:42] Yeah.

[31:43] And you want to make sure that...

[31:44] You could be there for a while.

[31:44] Yeah.

[31:45] You want to make sure there isn't a killer's evil twin down there, too.

Elliott Kalan

[31:49] You want to make sure it's not like Basket Case and the killer's Siamese twin brother

[31:54] who's a tiny gremlin.

[31:55] Yeah.

[31:56] Like a little ghoulie.

Stuart Wellington

[31:57] I also want to make sure there aren't...

Elliott Kalan

[31:58] That's also why I check my toilet every time before I sit down.

[32:01] Because it'll get you in the end.

[32:02] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[32:03] The poster scarred me for life.

[32:05] I check under the skirts of women with poodle skirts and fishnet stockings to make

[32:09] sure a munchie isn't down there.

[32:12] But frankly, I also check down there to make sure there aren't a shitload of gross spiders

[32:17] and stuff.

[32:18] Because if there's a killer chasing me, the last thing I want is to be bit by a gross spider.

[32:21] Well, but you saw that hotel.

Elliott Kalan

[32:22] It was super clean.

Stuart Wellington

[32:23] Yeah.

[32:24] And when was the last time you've been in a hotel where you can actually climb under the

[32:27] bed?

[32:28] That's true.

[32:29] Not recently.

Dan McCoy

[32:31] But anyway, speaking of the hotel, while they're at home with one guy on the grill, Stringer

[32:37] Bell realizes, oh, look, there's blood up here in the air vent.

[32:42] He stuffed a body in the air vent and he switched out the hotel uniform and he escaped when everyone

[32:49] was evacuating.

[32:51] You know, I think that number one, he might have checked the people that were being evacuated.

[32:55] No, they just let everyone rush out in a big crowd.

[32:57] Yeah.

[32:58] But number two, the guy escaped from the mental institution through an air vent.

[33:03] And wearing somebody else's clothes.

Stuart Wellington

[33:05] The other thing is like, yeah, I mean, like the guy just left.

[33:09] Like, if he let the guy walk by him, what was he expecting the killer to look like?

[33:13] He thought he had a beard and a lot of crazy hair.

[33:16] And a lot of blood on a knife.

Elliott Kalan

[33:18] Well, listen, we all know what killers look like.

[33:20] They're wearing hockey masks and they've got big machetes and a ton of blood on them.

Stuart Wellington

[33:24] Or Freddy Krueger faces.

Elliott Kalan

[33:26] I like it.

[33:26] You just get rid of a beard.

[33:27] At the police academy, they're like, how do you identify a killer?

[33:30] Well, let's take a look.

[33:32] He's going to have either crazy hair or a crazy beard.

[33:34] Maybe if he's got blood all over him, that's a good clue.

[33:38] And if not, then he's not a killer.

Stuart Wellington

[33:40] I'm imagining like a Hogan's Alley type situation where like cardboard cutouts flip around.

[33:44] You're like, baby, woman with a baby, normal person, killer with a beard.

[33:49] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[33:50] And then it says, what if that's a killer without a beard?

[33:53] No such thing.

[33:54] Correct.

[33:54] You passed.

Stuart Wellington

[33:56] 100%.

[33:57] You're now an honorary sheriff.

[33:59] Now you're in hero squad.

[34:01] Yeah.

[34:02] Here's your machine gun.

Elliott Kalan

[34:03] That would be the best TV show.

[34:05] Hero squad.

[34:06] They're the cops who break the rules because they have to.

[34:09] Hero squad with striker and hicks.

[34:11] Hero squad.

[34:12] Striker and hicks.

[34:13] Hero squad.

[34:15] Not really police.

[34:16] They just do stuff.

Stuart Wellington

[34:18] And their Native American tracker, Steel Wolf.

Elliott Kalan

[34:21] Steel Wolf.

[34:21] And Hunter Darkblade.

[34:22] Dark Claw.

[34:24] Blood Iron.

[34:26] Sleek Shadow.

[34:28] Storm Striker.

[34:29] Storm Striker.

Stuart Wellington

[34:29] They have a...

[34:30] Whoa.

[34:31] Is Storm Striker related to Detective Striker?

[34:34] Yeah.

[34:34] They're brothers.

[34:35] Oh, okay.

[34:36] But like blood brothers, right?

Elliott Kalan

[34:37] Storm Striker is actually a weatherman.

[34:39] Oh, nice.

[34:39] He didn't go into the police force.

Stuart Wellington

[34:41] Nice.

[34:42] So how many of those guys were Native American trackers?

[34:45] Almost all of them.

[34:47] Nice.

[34:48] But they're bringing their expertise to like a more urban environment?

Elliott Kalan

[34:52] Well, you know, they left the reservation.

[34:54] There wasn't a lot of future for them there.

[34:56] They took construction work and now they're in the police force.

Dan McCoy

[34:59] They can read like pigeon droppings.

Elliott Kalan

[35:03] They're the only ones who can track the wolfen that are at large in the city.

[35:06] Nice.

Dan McCoy

[35:07] Oh, man.

[35:07] So many wolfen in New York.

Elliott Kalan

[35:09] Well, I mean, they went down briefly when Giuliani was mayor, but now they're back.

Dan McCoy

[35:12] Yeah, the wolfen and the chuds, man.

[35:15] Anyway.

[35:16] But at the end, there's an exciting confrontation.

[35:19] Oh, wait.

[35:20] No, there's not.

[35:21] It's incredibly anti-clinactic.

[35:23] The girl kicks him twice.

[35:25] This is another one of those things.

[35:26] And then Stricker Bell shoots him.

Elliott Kalan

[35:27] Where it's like she kicks him in the face really hard.

[35:30] Like three times.

[35:31] Yeah.

[35:32] It's, ah, where did she learn to do this?

Stuart Wellington

[35:33] And they had a really good meat slapping sound effect like a fucking Indiana Jones movie.

[35:38] Like, where'd she learn to kick?

[35:39] And second of all, have you ever kicked somebody's head with your shoe off?

[35:42] It hurts like a bitch.

[35:44] Like, even if you have a lot of adrenaline going through.

Elliott Kalan

[35:46] Well, probably, she's probably got calluses all over her feet from cheerleading practice or something.

Stuart Wellington

[35:50] That's true.

[35:50] And from running to hide under beds.

[35:52] Yeah.

[35:53] I wish they'd explored that area of her personality a little more.

[35:56] Like, they showed, like, her growing up since three years ago.

[35:58] It'd be interesting, like, you show her.

[36:00] Like, constantly hiding under beds.

Elliott Kalan

[36:01] Yeah, there's a thing, like, she goes to sleep under a bed because it's the only place she feels safe.

[36:06] Absolutely.

Stuart Wellington

[36:06] That's where she eats dinner.

[36:08] Goes to school.

[36:09] Sure goes to school.

Elliott Kalan

[36:09] She takes a bed into school with her and lies underneath it.

Stuart Wellington

[36:12] Nice.

[36:13] That'd be awkward, but I bet she could do it.

[36:15] You'd really think that she would.

[36:16] She would.

[36:16] She doesn't even go to school nowadays, but.

[36:18] You know what you'd think is that.

Dan McCoy

[36:19] Someone had her the homework assignment under the bed.

[36:21] Sure.

Elliott Kalan

[36:22] You'd think that the teacher at the school went crazy, killed her family.

[36:26] You'd think she would leave town.

[36:28] Probably.

[36:28] And go to another school system.

Stuart Wellington

[36:29] I would.

[36:30] If a teacher got really obsessed with me sexually and then killed my entire family, I'd probably go to a different town.

[36:36] Yeah.

[36:37] Yeah.

[36:37] But I would still be really excited about that.

[36:39] Maybe you'd even change the name.

[36:41] Nope.

[36:41] No?

[36:42] I would remain Stryker Steelwood.

[36:43] Okay.

[36:44] Well, let's.

[36:45] Your birth name.

[36:46] Dr. Inferno Fireburns.

Dan McCoy

[36:49] Let's wrap it up, because there's really not that much about this movie to talk about.

[36:53] We should just get on to our final.

[36:55] Magma Hot Steel.

[36:56] Final Judgments.

Stuart Wellington

[36:57] Dan's favorite, Mean Man Cruelsome.

[36:59] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[37:01] He's the villain, though.

Stuart Wellington

[37:03] Oh, wait a minute.

[37:05] What if I, oh my god, I've been making the wrong movie.

[37:07] I gotta get out of here.

[37:09] Change my name to Punch Slab Rock Fist.

[37:11] Yep.

[37:12] Okay, so wait.

[37:13] Final Judgments?

Dan McCoy

[37:14] Yeah, let's talk about it.

[37:15] Is this a good, bad movie?

[37:17] Bad, bad movie?

[37:18] Or a movie that you actually genuinely like?

Stuart Wellington

[37:21] You know, I think a lot like the movie, this, our final judgments are going to be a complete

[37:26] switcheroonie from what we've been talking about the whole time.

[37:30] No, I'm not lying.

[37:31] It's not very good.

[37:32] It's a bad movie.

[37:33] I would never watch this again.

Dan McCoy

[37:34] Yeah, I was saying during the movie, it's like one of those pictures made up of a lot

[37:40] of pictures.

[37:41] Not like those collage pictures, not like the Truman Show poster, but one of those pictures

[37:46] where it's like, we've taken 100 photographs of a person and merged them.

[37:51] I've never seen one of those.

[37:52] We've tried to create like an average photo of the features.

[37:55] And this is sort of the version of that.

[37:57] We took 100 slasher films and we've merged them.

[38:01] So only the blandest version of the slasher films.

[38:03] Only the similarities appear.

[38:05] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[38:05] Wait, where do you see these types of pictures?

Dan McCoy

[38:07] Oh, you know.

[38:08] The internet.

Elliott Kalan

[38:09] He's got a subscription to Crazy Picture Magazine.

[38:13] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[38:14] The craziest pictures every month in your mailbox.

Stuart Wellington

[38:18] I thought that was a weekly.

Elliott Kalan

[38:19] That's Goofy Photo Weekly.

Stuart Wellington

[38:20] Sure, my mistake.

[38:22] Okay, so that's two bad, bad movies.

Elliott Kalan

[38:24] I'm going to say, shockingly, as you said, it's a bad, bad movie.

[38:30] What I said while we were watching is it felt like an outline for a movie.

[38:34] First, there's the scene with the killer.

[38:36] Then there's the scene with the therapist where we explain what happened.

[38:39] Then it's prom time.

[38:40] There's a scene where they're getting ready for prom.

[38:42] Then they're on the way to prom.

[38:43] Like, there was no connective tissue and there was no fleshing out.

[38:47] It was just like the points you had to hit to tell this terrible story.

[38:50] I will say a lot of the scenes were lit well.

[38:52] I don't know if you did the lighting, but it was well lit a lot of the time.

Dan McCoy

[38:55] Yeah, and good casting of the minor characters.

[38:58] The minor characters.

[38:59] The major characters.

Elliott Kalan

[38:59] It was like, at times it felt like they were like, well, we're making this by-the-numbers slasher film.

[39:05] Maybe we'll have Robert Altman cast the side characters and create their backstories.

[39:10] Because there's, like, just that, like, lesbian gym teacher was so much more interesting, even though she has about 40 seconds on screen, than Donna.

Stuart Wellington

[39:18] You know, if this movie had just been a movie where the police are really bad at their jobs, I might have liked it.

[39:25] It would have been Armed and Dangerous.

[39:27] Or I liked Lethal Weapon 2, you know.

Elliott Kalan

[39:30] Or Loaded Weapon 1.

Stuart Wellington

[39:31] Loaded Weapon 1.

[39:34] Or Nine and a Half Ninjas.

Dan McCoy

[39:36] Or Beverly Hills Ninja.

[39:39] Any of these movies.

[39:40] Three Ninjas.

[39:41] Three Ninjas, nice.

[39:43] Kick back.

Stuart Wellington

[39:44] Sidekicks?

[39:46] Yes.

[39:46] Sidekicks.

[39:47] With Chuck Norris.

[39:48] Oh, man.

[39:48] Now we're probably going to be able to be Googled now, since we mentioned Chuck Norris.

[39:52] Yeah, that's true.

[39:53] He's pretty hilarious.

Elliott Kalan

[39:54] He's lost his cred now, now that everyone knows he's a Huckabee conservative type.

[40:00] Okay.

[40:00] But anyway, you were saying, if it was just about Incompetent Police...

Stuart Wellington

[40:03] I probably would have liked it, but it was also not very interesting or anything else.

Elliott Kalan

[40:06] It was very boring.

[40:07] It was not 10,000 B.C. boring.

Stuart Wellington

[40:09] Yeah.

[40:09] No, of course not.

[40:10] I think that would be unfair.

Dan McCoy

[40:12] I think that 10,000 B.C. has been the nadir of the...

Elliott Kalan

[40:15] That is the dullest movie...

[40:17] Of the program.

[40:17] ...we have watched.

Stuart Wellington

[40:18] Yeah, that was really bad.

Elliott Kalan

[40:20] Even One Missed Call was better than that.

[40:22] Oh, yeah.

[40:22] That's just the song.

[40:24] The song the bear plays.

[40:27] On that note, on that happy note, let's move on.

[40:30] Spear Toots.

[40:31] Mannix!

[40:32] He took down a manic all by himself.

Dan McCoy

[40:35] Before we get into our recommendations, I have a few announcements to make.

[40:39] You sound so excited.

[40:41] Yeah.

[40:42] You know me.

[40:43] I'm filled with joy.

Elliott Kalan

[40:45] What you guys don't know is that every time we do one of these, Dan is drinking out of a bottle of gin.

[40:49] And so if it sounds like his energy is flagging by the end, it's because he's just thinking about the people he's wronged.

[40:54] Their faces swimming before him.

Stuart Wellington

[40:57] Yep.

[40:57] He keeps picking up a photo of his lost love and putting it down and picking it up and putting it down.

Dan McCoy

[41:04] I think her name was Angela.

[41:05] Look, I'm sorry if you guys find that distracting.

[41:08] Anyway, I bet some of you, not all of you, but a couple of you were wondering about the Flophouse contest.

[41:15] Since we haven't mentioned anything about it since we mentioned the winner.

[41:19] Judy, the winner of the Flophouse contest.

[41:21] You may remember her as the person who put delightful temporary tattoos all over her body.

Stuart Wellington

[41:26] Wait, those were temporary?

[41:28] I think we should revoke her victory.

Dan McCoy

[41:31] She is apparently moving away.

[41:35] That's sad.

[41:35] That's too bad.

[41:36] So we probably can't have her on the show.

[41:39] However, I want to keep the option open.

[41:42] I want to keep the invite open because, honestly, she was so far ahead.

[41:46] She earned it.

[41:47] She was the best entry by far.

[41:49] But, however...

Elliott Kalan

[41:50] It was way better than my entry.

Dan McCoy

[41:52] Yeah.

[41:52] Yeah, yours was terrible.

[41:53] Yeah.

[41:54] Yeah.

[41:55] That was just a dead bird.

[41:56] You handed me a dead bird.

Elliott Kalan

[41:58] Oh, you have a cat.

[41:59] I figured it would remind you of your cat and you'd like it.

[42:02] No.

Stuart Wellington

[42:02] Okay, yeah.

[42:03] So if Judy ever wants to come and watch a movie...

[42:05] I didn't even kill that bird.

[42:06] You're invited.

[42:07] I just killed it.

Dan McCoy

[42:08] However, the other contest we have running, the Uwe Bowl contest...

[42:13] That's how you pronounce that?

[42:14] That is how...

[42:15] You weren't here for the last episode when we talked about this.

Stuart Wellington

[42:19] Wait a minute.

[42:19] You guys did one without me?

[42:21] Yeah.

[42:22] What'd you watch?

[42:25] Wild Hogs.

[42:26] Anyway, so...

[42:27] Wild Hogs?

[42:27] You know.

[42:28] Okay, well, I was an extra in that movie, so I'm not allowed to actually talk about it

[42:32] in the podcast.

[42:32] So it's okay.

[42:33] You guys did it without me.

Elliott Kalan

[42:34] Yeah.

[42:34] Were you an extra in the scene where they were at the Chili Festival or whatever?

[42:39] Or were you an extra in the scene where...

[42:41] Chili Festival.

[42:42] ...where they were skinny dipping and the family came along?

Stuart Wellington

[42:45] No.

[42:46] I just watched that scene when I watched it at home last night on LaserDisc.

Dan McCoy

[42:52] Limited edition pressing one of one of the Wild Hogs LaserDisc.

[42:56] But anyway, we have a winner for the Create and Cast an Uwe Bowl film contest.

[43:03] I just want to read it.

[43:05] Okay.

[43:05] This is for Wolfenstein 3D colon...

[43:09] That's a good choice.

[43:09] ...the movie slash 3D.

[43:13] We've got here former L.A. Raiders superstar and CBS personality Howie Long...

[43:19] Nice.

[43:19] ...as allied spy William B.J. Blaskowitz.

Elliott Kalan

[43:23] Did you guys ever read Wizard Magazine, the Guide to Comics?

[43:26] Where they were really pushing the idea of Howie Long playing Venom slash Eddie Brock in a Spider-Man movie?

[43:32] Yeah.

[43:32] And I don't know why they thought that he was so good at it.

Dan McCoy

[43:36] Well, he was so charming in those ads with Terry Hatcher.

[43:39] This was way before that.

[43:40] This was when he was making that firefighter movie.

Stuart Wellington

[43:42] It was like Fireproof or Flamestorm.

[43:45] Right.

[43:46] Or Flame...

[43:47] Axe Fire.

[43:47] Ultimate Flamestorm.

[43:48] Ultimate Flamestorm.

[43:49] The other thing was...

[43:51] Hard Fire.

[43:52] And back during...

[43:53] And Wizard still has that column, by the way.

[43:55] Not that I look at Wizard Magazine.

[43:55] I haven't read that magazine in years.

[43:57] I looked through...

[43:58] It was in my friend's car one time.

[44:00] I was looking at it.

[44:00] But like...

[44:01] And for a long time, up until pretty much the release, they were pushing for Glenn Danzig to be Wolverine.

Elliott Kalan

[44:06] Yeah, they were really big on that.

[44:08] That was weird.

[44:08] They're big on people who don't have acting careers.

Dan McCoy

[44:12] Well, I think that being comics people, first of all, I think that they may be just focused on the look.

[44:18] Maybe.

[44:18] This person can capture the look of the comic.

[44:20] Yeah.

[44:21] Yeah, but can they perform?

Stuart Wellington

[44:22] Can they actually...

[44:23] They got the goods.

Dan McCoy

[44:25] Yeah.

[44:25] The acting chops.

[44:26] Well, anyway, let me get through this winning entry, though.

[44:30] Okay, drop it on us.

[44:31] So far, it's good.

[44:32] Amanda Peet is Nazi prison commandant Isla Braunsteiner, who secretly loves the strange American spy.

[44:39] At the beginning of the movie's last act, she eats the poison sausage, the Fuhrer intended for Blazkowicz.

[44:45] We got Alec Baldwin as Cyborg Adolf Hitler.

[44:48] I don't know about that casting.

[44:50] Thora Birch as Cyborg Eva Braun.

[44:54] Who do you look at for Cyborg...

Elliott Kalan

[44:56] Cyborg Adolf Hitler?

[44:57] I mean, my go-to is Wallace Shawn, and I think he might be good at that.

[45:00] But I don't know.

[45:01] Let's see.

[45:02] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[45:04] Rango Starr...

[45:05] Cyborg Adolf...

[45:05] Oh, oh, Shia LaBeouf.

[45:06] Cyborg Adolf Hitler.

[45:07] There you go.

[45:08] Done.

[45:09] Rango Starr and Zach Galifianakis as Nazi prisoners Lieutenant Smith Smitty and Lieutenant Frenchy, respectively.

Elliott Kalan

[45:17] Just to see the two of them on screen together.

[45:20] Chemistry.

[45:21] Explosive.

Dan McCoy

[45:22] Jamie Kennedy is head prison guard Hans Gross, who BJ beats to death with a bust of Hitler.

[45:30] Later, when he and Isla jog past the body, she exclaims, Mein Gott, it's gross.

[45:36] BJ shrugs and mutters, Baby, I've seen grosser things.

[45:39] Isla rolls her eyes along with a musical sting by an accordion.

[45:44] And lastly, Christopher Lloyd as President Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Elliott Kalan

[45:48] I want this movie made for that, because Christopher Lloyd doesn't do enough work.

Dan McCoy

[45:51] Yeah.

[45:51] So that's Colin from Portland, Oregon.

[45:54] What about Suburban Commando?

Elliott Kalan

[45:55] I didn't say he made no movies ever in history.

[45:57] I said he doesn't do enough work.

[45:59] Anyway...

[46:00] When it's...

[46:00] Okay.

[46:01] Colin...

[46:02] I didn't say that actor's never been featured in a film before.

Stuart Wellington

[46:06] I don't know who that is.

[46:07] Suburban Commando's like 14 years old.

[46:11] But I just saw that in the movie theater yesterday.

Dan McCoy

[46:15] Colin, you should write with your full address to theflophousepodcast at gmail.com so you can send your award, your prize.

[46:25] Hey, what's his prize?

[46:28] It's season one of Rocky and Bullwinkle, because that's a DVD I own and am getting rid of.

Elliott Kalan

[46:34] Don't pull back the curtain too much.

Dan McCoy

[46:37] And a signed copy of Wild Hogs, signed by all of us.

[46:41] Oh, that's awesome.

[46:42] Yeah.

[46:42] The actual copy we used for the show that you didn't actually do.

Elliott Kalan

[46:45] We could have sent that to the Smithsonian, but instead you're going to get it, Colin.

Dan McCoy

[46:50] Yeah.

[46:50] You can frame that, or you can throw it out.

[46:53] Or you can watch it.

[46:54] It's yours.

Elliott Kalan

[46:55] It's now your property.

[46:57] You're responsible for it.

[46:58] Listen, you legally can do anything.

Dan McCoy

[47:00] You're actually legally required to take it.

[47:02] I don't want it anymore, so there you go.

[47:05] Also...

[47:05] You know what?

Elliott Kalan

[47:06] Maybe I'll throw something in too.

[47:08] Yeah?

[47:08] I don't know what yet, but...

[47:09] Okay.

[47:10] Expect something else along with it.

[47:12] This guy works for the Daily Show.

[47:12] Yeah, so expect some sort of crap.

[47:14] Hang on, some sort of swag.

[47:17] I threw out a lot of Daily Show promotional stuff that I should have kept from 2004 that

[47:20] Colin might have liked.

[47:22] Okay.

[47:22] Stop with the mouth.

Dan McCoy

[47:26] And...

[47:26] Hey!

[47:28] Sarah Schaefer got to plug something while she was on the show, so let me just plug something,

[47:31] because it's been a while since I've been in a live show.

[47:35] But if you live in the New York area, you can come see me in a show called Shameful Display

[47:41] Presents You, Your World, and You, which is a political sketch comedy show.

[47:46] And it's going to be October 1926.

[47:50] And those are two dates, not 1926 a year.

[47:53] I was going to say, let me get my time machine, Dan.

[47:56] And ho-hum.

[47:58] November...

Elliott Kalan

[47:59] Maybe after the show we can go down to the store club and hang out with Zelda and F. Scott.

Dan McCoy

[48:03] And November 2 and 9 at 9.30 at the Magnet Theater.

[48:08] That's at magnettheater.com if you want to look it up.

[48:12] And it's a mere $5.

Elliott Kalan

[48:13] Swing by the Magnet Theater and see the show, then over to the Cotton Club.

Dan McCoy

[48:16] Yeah.

[48:17] See the Duke Ellington Orchestra.

[48:19] I feel like, what's this douche look like in real life?

Elliott Kalan

[48:22] Dinner at Del Frisco is with Meyer Lansky.

[48:24] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[48:25] So there's that.

[48:26] Played by Patrick Dempsey in the movie Mobsters.

[48:30] Anyone else have any?

Elliott Kalan

[48:30] Played to a T, might I add.

[48:32] Then it's off to Paris with Ernest and Gertrude.

Dan McCoy

[48:35] Anyone else have any plugs before we move on?

Elliott Kalan

[48:37] I mean, I always have plenty of stuff to plug, but I won't get into it.

Dan McCoy

[48:40] All right.

[48:41] I'm not allowed to plug.

[48:42] Okay, yeah.

[48:43] Stuart doesn't understand the concept of plugging things.

[48:46] So, all right.

[48:47] Let's move on to our recommendations.

[48:49] Movies we actually like.

[48:50] Because it is Shocktober here at...

[48:52] Wach-a-chow!

Elliott Kalan

[48:55] Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh.

[48:59] Chains rattling.

Dan McCoy

[49:01] We're recommending horror films.

[49:07] Oh!

[49:09] So, uh...

Stuart Wellington

[49:11] Ring around the road.

[49:13] We are angering our fans.

Elliott Kalan

[49:17] Sound of spiders.

[49:19] Yep.

Stuart Wellington

[49:19] Let me take out my Fright Sounds Volume 4 tape from the cassette player.

[49:24] Okay, Dan, continue.

[49:26] Well, anyway, yes.

Dan McCoy

[49:27] We're doing horror movie recommendations.

[49:29] And just to stop you guys from making Fright Sounds, let me go first.

[49:33] I would like to recommend The Signal.

[49:37] It's a film...

[49:37] I believe it came out last year.

[49:40] It's about a mysterious signal that is broadcast over the radio and television.

[49:47] And it makes everyone very aggressive.

[49:50] It makes them paranoid.

[49:51] It's sort of...

[49:52] People are still, you know, rational in the sense that they think that they're making sense.

[49:56] But they...

[49:57] But their perception is altered so that they attack people in ways...

[50:02] Because they're hallucinating and such and such.

[50:04] And it's split into three sections.

[50:07] It was actually directed by three different people.

[50:09] And it has kind of an overarching story.

[50:11] But each segment has a different tone.

[50:13] Like the first one's sort of like a zombie movie.

[50:15] The second one is like a horror comedy.

[50:17] Like a black comedy.

[50:18] And the third one is kind of a psychological thriller.

[50:21] And, uh...

[50:22] It's good.

[50:22] I recommend it.

[50:24] Keep it short.

Stuart Wellington

[50:25] I am...

[50:26] I'm pretty sure I didn't recommend this last time I was on.

[50:28] But I was pretty drunk.

[50:29] So I don't remember.

[50:30] But I would like to recommend a British film called The Cottage.

[50:35] I don't know if you can see it over here in the old United States yet.

[50:40] But it stars Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

[50:44] And Rhys Shearsmith from The League of Gentlemen.

[50:47] And the premise is that a pair of kind of bumbling guys,

[50:50] a pair of bumbling brothers, end up kidnapping the daughter of a mob boss.

[50:54] And they take her to this cottage out in the woods.

[50:57] Unknown to them, they've actually stumbled into the predatory grounds

[51:00] of a hillbilly cannibal murderer guy.

[51:04] And, uh...

[51:05] Stuff gets killed.

[51:06] It's good.

[51:07] It's a horror comedy.

[51:08] I'd watch it.

[51:09] I met Andy Serkis once.

Dan McCoy

[51:11] He's a very hairy man.

[51:13] Very short.

[51:14] Very hairy.

[51:15] That's what I have to say about that.

[51:17] Hell yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[51:17] Alright.

[51:19] Well, the scary movie I'll recommend is one...

[51:23] I'm going to pick an old movie.

[51:24] Because that's what I do.

[51:25] If anyone hasn't seen the movie The Old Dark House,

[51:28] which was one that James Whale made right after Frankenstein,

[51:31] but before Bride of Frankenstein.

[51:32] I think that...

[51:33] I think.

[51:34] I think that's the timeline of it.

[51:35] And it is the classic story of a couple...

[51:38] Their car breaks down on a rainy night.

[51:40] They're near an old dark house.

[51:42] And there is a creepy family living in the house.

[51:44] And it's...

[51:45] There's nothing supernatural in the movie.

[51:46] It's just creepy stuff.

[51:48] The insane brother, insane sister.

[51:51] They're both very creepy.

[51:52] They have another brother who they've locked upstairs because he's too dangerous to let out.

[51:57] Boris Karloff is their disgruntled butler who drinks and gets violent.

[52:01] It's just very...

[52:02] Kind of insane in a way 30s movies are sometimes.

[52:06] And also I'm going to recommend, even though it's Shocktober and this is not a scary movie,

[52:10] a movie I just finished watching this morning called The Friends of Eddie Coyle

[52:14] with Robert Mitchum and Peter Boyle.

[52:17] Oh, and Alex Rocco,

[52:18] which is a really good crime thriller from the 70s

[52:21] about kind of criminals who are career criminals

[52:25] and don't like doing this anymore because it's not a great way to make a living.

[52:29] But they kind of have to live with the consequences of having this life.

[52:33] And Robert Mitchum is really good in it.

[52:35] Yeah.

[52:36] It has a very inappropriate score, though.

[52:37] It's kind of like guys hanging out in seedy bars a lot

[52:41] and kind of dealing with the unhappiness of where their life is

[52:44] now that they're not young but they're still involved in crime.

[52:46] But the soundtrack is like...

[52:47] Like very 70s.

Dan McCoy

[52:52] Like the night chord theme?

Elliott Kalan

[52:54] No, that's...

Dan McCoy

[52:57] Yeah, but this is more of a guitar sound, less of a bass guitar sound.

[53:06] You're listening to mouth instruments.

[53:10] Yeah, they were.

[53:11] Oh, Bobby McFerrin just walked in.

[53:15] Oh, man.

[53:18] Goodbye, Bobby.

Elliott Kalan

[53:22] This is like an old-time radio show.

[53:25] Oh, put your things down by the fire.

[53:27] Crinkle, crinkle, crinkle, crinkle, crinkle, crinkle.

Dan McCoy

[53:29] You think we have that Foley artist.

[53:30] You think that saying words is the same as having sound effects.

Elliott Kalan

[53:34] I'm kind of an onomatopoeia type guy.

Dan McCoy

[53:36] All right.

[53:36] Well, this has been a fun night.

[53:39] I learned it.

Elliott Kalan

[53:40] Nothing takes the fun out of a night like stating it's fun.

[53:45] Nothing deflates a room than that.

Stuart Wellington

[53:48] Yeah, so we're done, right?

[53:49] Yeah, we're done.

[53:50] Okay, cool.

[53:51] Good night, everyone.

[53:52] I'm Dan McCoy.

[53:53] I'm Stuart Wellington.

Elliott Kalan

[53:54] I'm Ellie Kalin for the foreseeable future.

[53:57] See ya.

Stuart Wellington

[53:58] Bye.

Dan McCoy

[53:58] Bats flapping.

Elliott Kalan

[54:25] Werewolf sounds.

[54:27] Welcome.

The Flop House: Episode #24 - Prom Night

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