The Flop House Movie Minute #25 - Remake Reuse Recycle

[0:00] It's the Flophouse movie minute

[0:09] So we're doing a movie minute here Ellie you yeah, I'm really setting up the premise

[0:24] There's a cat falling asleep off to the side a four-track mixing board

[0:30] Talking into microphones, but Ellie you really wanted to talk about this subject

[0:34] Talking about the subject of movie remakes, which most movies are these days. It feels like our remakes of other movies and

[0:43] No, but they don't have to tell them in this detail with the Sun

[0:46] But it just it bugs me because it seems like for it seems like they're taking specifically the movies

[0:52] I really like and remaking them

[0:54] So like the day the earth stood still they remade

[0:57] Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 the remake comes out soon

[0:59] And these are movies that very much are of the time that they were made like they don't make sense nowadays

[1:06] Assault on Precinct 13 when they redid that

[1:08] And I just found out the other day that apparently they're at least going to try to do a remake of Videodrome

[1:14] Which it seems insane to me because if ever there was a movie that

[1:18] Relies on it being the product of David Cronenberg's brain. It would be Videodrome

[1:23] And if ever there's a movie that fit well into the 80s when people were kind of really understanding for the first time

[1:29] How much you could like television had been around long enough that you could see the effect it was having on society

[1:35] But cable was just coming in home video was really just coming in like it seemed like you were on the edge of

[1:42] Videotape becoming more powerful than real life

[1:44] So do you think that this is the result of like some studio head like watched Videodrome and was like

[1:49] This could be a great film without all the TV fucking me. I just take that out. Nobody fucks a TV in it

[1:56] He sticks his head inside of television

[2:06] 20 million dollars, please

[2:07] I think it's literally that there's a list of movies that is

[2:11] Circulating Hollywood that have not been remade yet

[2:14] And they just check them off as they go along and in the in the thing I read about this it mentioned that they were

[2:18] Gonna try to bring in nanotechnology and also expand it

[2:22] So it's more of a site large-scale sci-fi action film and Videodrome

[2:27] Much like the original which has maybe six characters and takes place almost entirely inside of James Woods head right most part and his science

[2:35] Science fiction in in the way that maybe like I don't know like a Vonnegut book is science fiction

[2:40] but there's science fiction elements to yeah, but it's using like science fiction elements like mainly as a

[2:46] First hugely allegory. Yeah

[2:50] Lots of science fiction is but but it's it's a movie where he

[2:53] puts a slot opens up in his belly that he puts videotapes and hides a gun inside and

[2:59] You were never quite sure if he's insane or if this is actually happening

[3:04] If you introduce nano, I'm sure that someone saw that and was like wait a minute

[3:08] What if we use nanotechnology so tiny robots are building a slot in his belly?

[3:13] I

[3:15] Why didn't Cronenberg think of that?

[3:16] You know and like turn his belly into a little blu-ray play then this scene would make sense

[3:21] They like I imagine it was someone watching it and not realizing that that is not supposed to be a logical development

[3:28] I think it was somebody walked through the criterion collection of the DVD

[3:33] Section of the Virgin Megastore near where they live and yeah, they're just going through the possible remake ideas

[3:38] well

[3:38] I can either redo closely watched trains or

[3:42] Mishima a life in four chapters or

[3:45] videodrome

[3:46] Videodrome has a gun in it. I think I'll use that one

[3:50] And the other the other bit so that made me really mad because these are movies that videodrome

[3:54] Especially these are movies that I and taking Palma to three that I love like there's something very special about them

[3:59] And they feel kind of singular and to remake them even if it you know the old movie is still gonna exist

[4:06] It's not like with stagecoach where they remade it in the 60s

[4:09] And they bought up all the prints of the 30s version and tried to destroy them except for one and that's why stagecoach still

[4:15] Exists today. It was the copy in John Wayne's personal vault was the only one that they didn't destroy pretty much

[4:21] Cuz they're like we don't want the 30s one around that's competition for our shitty version of this great movie anyway

[4:26] It's it still dilutes it a little bit because every time now

[4:29] I'm gonna have to say you know in videodrome the original that da da da da da not the remake like that's just

[4:34] I don't like it

[4:35] You know that scene in the day of the earth's mouth that scene in the day when Michael Rennie in the day of the earth

[4:40] So still whoa

[4:41] Keanu Reeves is in the day the earth's still I mean the original not the remake and the other big news was that apparently I

[4:47] Guess they're making a remake of drop-dead Fred

[4:51] The Rick my all Phoebe Kate's vehicle with for many years my least favorite movie the news is apparently Russell Brand

[4:59] In the Rick my all and it's

[5:07] If ever there was a movie that it's well, it's one thing's great by the way

[5:11] Yeah, it's one thing to remake to remake a bad movie and be like I can make this into a good movie

[5:17] But there's no way to make drop-dead Fred into a good movie

[5:23] Childhood friend comes back and he causes trouble

[5:25] Yeah, it's one of these movies where

[5:28] We're supposed to laugh at the fact that someone's life is being destroyed by

[5:33] Basically by a monster. Yeah

[5:36] there's no real there's no real difference between it and like

[5:40] Poltergeist, you know, that's yeah and like

[5:43] Like do they ever address that? It could all actually be inside her head. I don't think so

[5:47] It would be interesting if the other thing would be interesting the best-case scenario is also the worst case

[5:53] It'd be great at the last

[5:55] they're interesting at the last shot of the movie was like I don't remember how it ends her hugging the romantic it lead or something and

[5:59] Then the camera pulls back and and pulls back out of the forehead of Phoebe Kate's drooling with her eyes staring off into this

[6:07] She's in a better place now, you know, we're psycho or something Brazil or Brazil. Yeah, but it's

[6:17] But it's you know, it's just sad and remind it brought back the pain of the fact that I think that's Rick

[6:23] The pain of drop-dead Fred, which I remember seeing in the theaters very clearly and and the fact that last week when it was revived

[6:31] It was part of Rick Myles

[6:32] Retrospective event and the fact that was really his only American work that I can think of and he is such a

[6:38] Talented English comic actor. Yeah. Well, I'm actually

[6:42] I'm a little excited about this whole remake thing because you know

[6:46] I figure eventually they'll get around to remaking a movie that's very dear to my heart and that's

[6:51] Patrick Dempsey's film a lover boy

[6:54] Where you know, he plays a college-age kid trying to figure out his life

[6:59] He's getting kicked out of school

[7:00] And the only way he can go to school is by raising a bunch of money so he can get with the girl

[7:05] He loves and the only way he can do that is by being a male prostitute

[7:09] to women who have

[7:13] No, no, he finds he finds a way on the no, that would be star maps. Yeah. No he does it

[7:19] He does it through the pizzeria. He works at when when does that work when women order extra anchovies?

[7:27] He knows that's a cue that he's going to be having sex with them for $200

[7:31] And of course, he's the only pizza boy who works there 24 hours a day

[7:36] They kind of address that is somehow like he fucks one chick and she tells all her friends

[7:41] And they were like there's got to be a lot of desperate women calling for extra anchovies

[7:45] Showing up and being like and then them ripping off their robe

[7:48] I don't know and then him just handing them the pizza and then being stuck with paying for a pizza

[7:53] They want to pay for us. I assume that there's some zany scene in the film where an anchovy lover

[7:59] Just you know wants a pizza. Well, there's to be like this beautiful woman in a bikini

[8:05] Yeah, I can't wait and she actually had ordered it for her her kids who are the only kids in the universe who actually want

[8:12] But what my hope is well, they're there her children are pregnant well

[8:17] What I hope

[8:21] Well, I would point out that they've already remade this movie as the web porn site Big Sausage Pizza, okay

[8:27] Well, I think it can go one step further because we all know of my love of the porn site Big Sausage Pizza

[8:33] But what I think needs to happen is this movie needs to be the whole my premise needs to be turned on its ear

[8:39] Oh, how do we do that? Yep, shake it all up. I say female lead female main lover girl

[8:45] Yeah, it'll be lover girl. She delivers pizzas still I think pizzas. That's good. It's good stuff extra anchovies

[8:52] You don't want to lose that comic gold

[8:54] And she's so she's basically the more common female prostitute

[8:59] And so she's having sex with desperate women whose husbands are cheating on them. That's not actually a bad idea

[9:06] Initially I was assuming it was going to be cuckolded men whose wives are cheating on them and

[9:12] They're a way to get rid of the cuckolds horns is by having sex with this young

[9:17] Prostitute who's having sex with them to get money so that she can go to college and be with her boyfriend

[9:23] Since the Middle Ages, no one has been more worried about

[9:28] Well, I think I think today's man I think today's movie going man is concerned about being cuckolded

[9:35] Like so it can feel good. So is this still a light-hearted comedy because it sounds a lot grimmer. There's a certain fantasy

[9:42] Aspect to a young guy having sex with a lot of beautiful older women for money

[9:46] Yet when it's a young girl having sex with older men for money, it's a lot seedier. I have to say well

[9:52] I was a Russian immigrants that we're talking about. I mean, I was I was thinking yes, it's Eastern Promises

[9:57] Yeah, well, I was thinking Cronenberg possibly or maybe Mike Lee for the the directing

[10:01] Okay, so the two least funny directors there are I think both those guys would be great like they could throw in a lot

[10:06] Of comic who directed it irreversible. Maybe we could have him

[10:12] That's right

[10:13] Get one of those guys who did funny games maybe yeah, that's some German guy. Yeah, I think any of those guys

[10:21] I think they have a firm grasp on what the subject matter is and I think they all love pizza

[10:26] You

[10:30] Walking into the into the office to the production office to pitch this movie you go one word pizza

[10:35] Have I got your attention? I know I do

[10:38] Anyway, let's tie this in with the Domino's extra anchovies lover girl

[10:44] It's not that's the right that sounds like the Gotham City pizza. It's stripped of everything but pepper

[10:49] But pepperonis and anchovies, I think that that was how a hot dog the movie got

[10:56] The delicious sausage the hot dog, let me show you one thing pulls out foil wrapped object. What is it?

[11:02] Oh, it's a hot dog. Have I got your attention?

[11:05] Great. Let's make a movie

[11:08] So, yeah, so you have some films that you're scared of

[11:15] There's nothing that scares me more than the

[11:18] Than the drop dead Fred remake plan

[11:21] There are movies that I'm unhappy that it was decided

[11:25] You know what? There are no good original scripts in Hollywood that will make us money or that we can advertise

[11:30] Let's remake movies that other people haven't seen

[11:34] I mean, there's like they could make go-bots movies or Thundercats

[11:39] the other thing about this is that a friend of mine who's a

[11:41] Silverhawks a friend of mine who's another comedy writer has told me the story of her being

[11:47] Being offered the job being offered the opportunity to pitch his version of a remake of mother jugs and speed

[11:53] so this studio wanted to remake mother jugs and speed a Bill Cosby film about competing ambulance drivers and

[12:00] Decide and decided that they had no idea how to do it

[12:03] So they would give writers the chance to pitch their versions of it and then buy the one they liked the most

[12:08] So like how creatively bankrupt do you have to be to choose such a dumb movie to remake but not even have a specific way

[12:14] To do it. There's some there's some studio ahead who's choosing movies to remake based on their titles

[12:20] Yeah, oh, I want to make remake freebie and the beam

[12:24] That sounds like a delightful romp

[12:27] Can me I was just gonna say Mac and me also

[12:30] Yeah, it's there's no my stepmother is an alien

[12:36] Yeah, so when he got blue steel that's a good title, let's remake a movie whatever that's about let's just redo that

[12:42] Honey, I blew up the kid again moral of this story is nothing

[12:48] The moral of the story is get ready for more remakes of your favorite film. We're probably gonna end up having to review them

[12:53] Oh, yeah, of course my prom night or 10,000

[12:57] 10,000 BC was not really a remake. It was it. Well, I'm not gonna ruin my prom night

[13:02] By reviewing a fucking movie with you turds. We'll talk

[13:05] We'll talk about it later

[13:11] You freebie in the beam

The Flop House Movie Minute #25 - Remake Reuse Recycle

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