Ep.#290 - Meatballs Part II

[0:00] On this episode we discuss meatballs part two

[0:05] We are reviewing a movie this week not the food not the second meatball if I assume three to four meatballs

[0:13] In your spaghetti plate we apologize for any misunderstandings

[0:30] You

[0:43] Hey everyone and welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy

[0:47] Hey, and this rascal over here is named as Stuart Wellington. Hey everybody

[0:52] It's Elliot Kalin saying is that a little bit of extra pep in my step?

[0:56] No, it's just the afterglow of having been at my brother's wedding yesterday

[0:59] For future historians, you'll know I recorded this the day after my brother's wedding the date of which has been lost to history

[1:05] And I'm currently excited that because he just got married. It's unlikely. He'll just show up on this podcast

[1:12] Not tonight. He's going on his honeymoon, but he's gonna wander in the door

[1:16] I like every other episode like

[1:21] Pop out of a toilet like a ghouli and let's talk about the opposite of ghouli's

[1:26] I

[1:37] Hope without on your anniversary card

[1:42] You'll be clear why I'm bringing up her in a moment. Yeah, I'll say the opposite of ghouli's

[1:46] Yeah on Valentine's Day

[1:48] The the ground outside my apartment is littered with candy hearts have been tossed away because it does not feature the you are not a

[1:55] goofy

[1:56] So joining us today is a special guest. That's right

[1:58] It's my wife owner of multiple bars in Brooklyn taker of multiple improv classes

[2:06] That's right. That's Charlene Wellington and flop house road manager. Oh and flop house road manager, which keeps these cats in order. Hi guys

[2:17] Thanks for having me it's been a while it has been always

[2:25] Yeah, I mean the longest while I feel like like Lucy trying to get Ricky to let me in the show finally

[2:34] Reference that I don't get cuz I am a young hip cool

[2:37] Make it about younger, please. The only show Stewart's familiar with

[2:42] And the best show. Oh see Charlene's just

[2:46] Is the backdoor pilot attempt second backdoor pilot attempt for Stewart's younger cast?

[2:53] Listen to the previous episodes of the show if you're a first-time listener to get that joke previous episodes that the Sharon Tate episode

[3:02] And also that joke it's just

[3:07] So before we get into why Charlene picked meatballs too for us to watch

[3:13] Dan, what do we do on this podcast?

[3:16] This is a podcast where you watch a bad movie and we talk about it. Usually we do something that's newer

[3:22] Let's say new to home. I used to I would I would say home video, but it's all streaming these days

[3:27] So home formats, I guess home viewing. Yeah, and

[3:31] But when we have a guest on we like to give them the option to say

[3:36] To throw the curveball or do something that they want to do

[3:38] I have a question for Charlene knowing that this is about watching a bad movie and talking about it

[3:43] Why did you what what drove you to be on the show?

[3:46] Waste your time watching some movie and then yammering with us. Well, I watched some of the movies with Stewart

[3:53] Although I had to try to be a professional and not fall asleep

[3:57] Well, then Dan is not a professional

[4:01] Because I fell asleep but I woke up and finished watching the movie but I basically just wanted to see what you guys do

[4:13] I

[4:18] Believe she thought this was just an excuse for us to go see our do Mars, but no

[4:22] They're actually doing it. No

[4:25] Yeah, not like I was

[4:28] Yeah

[4:30] An R and not a D not a D like a Lamar. Yeah, there's no D and gala mod

[4:37] What have I been putting in my mouth

[4:40] I feel like this is a question we'd ask

[4:43] Famous

[4:44] Facebook bad Italian comic strip to Joey Calabrese. It's where the answer to this

[4:56] Charlene I think all the floppers out there wondering what's it like to be married to an original peach Wow

[5:04] It's like something embarrassing

[5:08] Um, it's like turning so many

[5:11] all the time

[5:14] Stewart makes me breakfast every single morning

[5:18] What a darling. Yeah, he's he's

[5:22] Not a party animal

[5:25] Oh

[5:28] It's crumbling

[5:34] So we

[5:35] So we today we watched the movie or whatever for this episode

[5:39] We're reviewing the movie meatballs part 2 from what 1984 now, is it meatballs part 2 or just meatballs?

[5:45] It is meatballs part 2 because me specifically

[5:47] meatballs part 2 implies a direct continuation from

[5:51] An interesting multiple chapters of one greater story

[5:55] The meatballs epic and also I don't I don't know that I've ever seen the first meatballs

[5:59] So why is it called meatballs? Now if I may could I like take a moment to talk about the meatball series, please?

[6:05] That's exactly the untrue way to do that walk through it

[6:09] Or do you want to make make a ghoulies reference first and kind of sidestepped?

[6:12] Well, the original meatballs was this low-budget film about a camp of summer camp to brothers

[6:19] Who are opening an Italian restaurant?

[6:21] Big night. Oh, what's the what? Oh, this is Heath Ledger and he's like the first night

[6:30] Okay, you know what I mean, that's the night's tale

[6:36] Okay, well anyway the point is meatballs was this little movie I think it was like

[6:41] Canadian producers like Ivan Reitman directed I think and it was like that might have been his first movie

[6:46] But the point is I love that you're like, let me talk about the meatball series. Well, I don't know

[6:52] But like they like it's this this little it's like a guy who doesn't understand how say a piece of food like maybe a

[6:59] Meatball would be made. He just knows how it tastes when it hits his mouth

[7:02] It's this little 1980s summer camp comedy that would be forgotten

[7:08] if not for

[7:09] Bill Murray who would like this was his first

[7:12] major

[7:13] Hollywood comedy movie role starring role and

[7:17] He came in. He basically

[7:19] One thing just so you said it was a little kind of low-budget Canadian movie, you know

[7:23] Suddenly, this is his first big Hollywood starring role

[7:29] Maybe could understand it, but I'm gonna be both of those things

[7:37] But he came in and he like basically improvised a lot of his lines like they threw out a lot of the

[7:43] scripts when they saw like what was working about the movie was Bill Murray and his relationship to this one like sort of like

[7:51] kid that needed guidance and like that brought the humor and the heart to the meatballs movie and so it was a

[7:58] Minor success certainly like a good return on the investment now meatballs, too

[8:03] Was a unrelated summer camp script that after meatball became a success

[8:08] The

[8:10] it to the meatballs name and so they

[8:14] Made this movie now meatballs three

[8:17] Is that the one with the ghost of the porn star?

[8:19] Yes

[8:19] You know the meatball series had been a PG series up until number three when it became an R-rated series where?

[8:25] Sally Kellerman played the ghost of a porn star helping a kid get laid and then people's

[8:29] Pg in the 70s

[8:37] Back in the day a PG movie could feature a werewolf surfing on top of

[8:47] I mean there wasn't towards a period where like

[8:49] Even PG comedies in the 80s. They're like gotta throw some boobs in there. You know I've come to model

[8:54] It's part of the human body

[8:56] Late live show in Boston and there may be a presentation about it done

[9:02] Me you can write off all the stuff you've been watching

[9:05] Yeah, but just to close it out meatballs for starred Corey Feldman was also a

[9:12] Sex comedy a lot of nudity in that from what I understand. I'm not seeing it

[9:19] On the message boards you frequent my rest words

[9:22] But in my resource that research that was also not supposed to be a meatballs movie and

[9:27] Another unrelated script, they just left the meatballs name on that's kind of with the howling movies

[9:40] So why is it called meatballs because like I went to summer camp

[9:44] No, I mean these I'm sure they served us meatballs at some point, but I was never like hey

[9:48] You know what's so special at the summer camp experience the meatballs so surely

[9:53] Charlene you have a history with the meatballs franchise

[10:00] I remember loving the original Meatballs movie and kind of like I remember being a

[10:05] little kid and looking forward to my first... So you can you tell us why it's

[10:08] called Meatballs? No, but looking forward to like I'm gonna go to summer camp in

[10:14] three years I'm gonna go to sleepaway camp in two years and like using that as

[10:19] a guide for what's gonna happen when I go to camp. Oh yeah. So I was like a

[10:23] little bit afraid of all the pranks. Yeah they don't seem to have a lot of

[10:28] activities at the camp. It's mostly just pranks and like free-floating kid

[10:32] walking around. I think it's a perfect time to get into this this little plot

[10:36] here. Yeah tell us Stuart what's what happens in this movie Meatballs Part 2

[10:39] the continuing story of the Meatballs. So Meatballs Part 2 opens of course with

[10:44] the TriStar logo. It opens in media res on top of spaghetti all covered with cheese.

[10:53] Yeah yeah there's a bunch of detectives standing around being like where's that

[10:57] poor meatball? Now that I'm glad you mentioned the TriStar logo because it's

[11:02] one of my favorite logos. Every time I hear that music and it really brings me

[11:07] back to being a kid. Anything with a flying horse as long as there isn't a

[11:11] Perseus on the back of it I'm down. Okay so we then got to another production

[11:20] logo and this one's a little bit of a little dig. A space production. That's the

[11:26] first time the movie winks at the audience to let you know this movie is

[11:30] gonna be out of this world. Okay now we open in media res in a bus full of rowdy

[11:43] campers and we realize that this bus is traveling to Camp Sasquatch. Now is that

[11:47] the camp from the first Meatballs movie? I can't stop singing Waiting for the

[12:02] Summer. It is obviously a hit song. It goes a little something like this it

[12:08] isn't so that's I mean that's crazy that they would save a gem like this for the

[12:12] sequel. By the way the original sorry the original camp in Meatballs 1 was

[12:16] camp North Star. Sasquatch is better. So the song goes a little something like this

[12:22] okay. Is that your version of a pitch pipe? There's a video online of a guy doing an

[12:40] ice cream taste and he's going, sweet, bold, tangy. It's like he's trying to call a cat to him to lick the ice cream off his face. So it goes, waiting for the summer, waiting and I'm waiting, funning in a sunning, funning in a summer. They say we've been waiting for the

[13:03] summer all year long. We've been waiting for the summer to sing this song. I'm like

[13:07] did I write this song? Like the swimming and the women and the climming and the

[13:11] grimming and I don't know. You're like when are we gonna get to the summer? Is

[13:14] it like the tallest building in Philadelphia over here?

[13:19] So who's driving that rowdy bus? Of course that is future star Paul Rubens

[13:24] wearing an aviator cap so you know this guy is a little bit wacky. The kids are

[13:30] rowdy, he gets mad, they almost crash, etc. The bus is pulled over by a police car.

[13:36] You think it's for driving but no, the bus pulls them over because they are

[13:40] handing off a juvenile delinquent by the name of Flash who has been ordered by

[13:46] order of a judge to serve out a sentence as a CIT which we learned as a counselor

[13:52] in training. And he says it was either this or the military. Or maybe prison.

[13:56] Wait, who is? Flash the Bash, the hero of the film. I believe they gave a similar, I believe in the

[14:03] original script for Watchmen, they gave Rorschach the same. Herm, I guess I'll take the summer camp.

[14:09] You kids don't understand. You're not stuck here with me. I'm stuck here with

[14:13] you. Isn't that the other way around Rorschach? No, I'm not happy to be here.

[14:17] Herm, I can't float on my back so I'm a beginner. I guess I'll blow bubbles

[14:21] through my mask in the water. Now this is, this may be ridiculous. I'm sorry, I can see you want to say that.

[14:28] Rorschach's like, it's Color War Rorschach, we didn't have to murder the other

[14:33] campers. War is war. This may seem ridiculous for a movie like Meatballs 2

[14:39] to raise any objections to the logic of the film, but this is the first time I'm like, is this a

[14:44] thing that like people get sentenced to be a camp counselor as community service? We're going to put you in charge of some children. It's either go to jail or be the only person in charge of these

[14:57] children. Jail please. And this delinquent Flash is kind of like a Brooklyn-y, like cha-chi type. He's kind of like a cha-chi. Now I know why Charlene wanted to watch this movie. He's a real Danny Zuko.

[15:11] Although throughout the rest of the movie people repeatedly call him a dork, which I

[15:17] object to because he's clearly not a dork. No, he's a greaser punk. As he explains to them, I'm not a dork, I'm a town.

[15:23] I believe that was the first time the phrase dork was used in a movie. Don't look it up.

[15:29] Why should we start being accurate about anything? By the way, I confirmed that the first Meatballs is where that

[15:36] irritating summer song comes from. Oh, is it? Are you ready for the summer? Do you go to your sources? Are you ready for the good times? Exactly.

[15:44] Now what I like, what I want to mention here is, so Flash meets his friend Eddie, who was I guess already going to be in camp, and he's like, Flash, Flash the

[15:53] Bash! And then later on a character calls Flash Bash, and he's like, the name's Flash. And I kept being like, but your friend called you that earlier.

[16:01] What, is that just like, it's okay for other, like, goof, grease, goofballs? Bash, not just Bash.

[16:07] Flash and Eddie are that special type of teenage camp counselor that are played by 30-year-old men who smoke cigarettes all the time.

[16:14] We're also introduced to two young women who are going to camp. One who is kind of demure, dressing like an Amish person named Cheryl.

[16:23] And her friend, who's a little more outspoken, named Nancy. Nancy asks Cheryl, are you from outer space? But that would be crazy, because there's no way this movie set in a summer camp would feature a character from outer space.

[16:34] Oh, I'm going to chime in with a lot of details about these actors as we go along.

[16:39] This is a new thing for you. I want to say that. I like it, but it's new. I don't want Charlene to think that this usually happens.

[16:46] Now this demure...

[16:47] Cheryl, like microchip, or what's the character from the Arrow TV show with the paralyzed, oh, whatever.

[16:53] Oracle.

[16:54] Oracle, maybe.

[16:55] Is it? I don't watch Arrow, but Oracle would fulfill that role in the DC Universe. Barbara Gordon.

[17:01] Does that mean I have to break Dan's back so that he can do this role?

[17:04] Technically, Shooter in the Spine, in a comic book that probably should not have been made part of the Batman canon. It's not really appropriate for all ages.

[17:12] So this demure lady is played by Kim Richards, who was a child actress, who I saw many times as a kid in Escape to Which Mountain, which played on Disney Channel all the time.

[17:22] Wait, Escape to Which Mountain?

[17:23] Oh boy.

[17:24] It was an old time in Costello's Disney in the 1970s routine.

[17:28] She had some...

[17:29] Escape to Which Mountain. That's what I'm trying to say. That's what I want to know.

[17:33] She had some small success as an adult actress, mostly known as a child actress, but now mostly known...

[17:37] What?

[17:38] Because she's one of the real housewives.

[17:40] Really?

[17:41] Of Beverly Hills.

[17:42] Oh.

[17:44] Oh, how far the mighty have fallen.

[17:47] He falls too.

[17:48] Too being one of the most successful television franchises currently operating.

[17:52] Is she one of the ones that are in jail?

[17:55] I don't know.

[17:56] Well, Dan's research only takes us so far. He got most of that from a shoeshine boy that he paid five bucks to.

[18:03] Yeah, yeah. This is Sherlock Holmes' homeless necklace.

[18:06] He said he'd keep his ears open for more information about Cheryl.

[18:09] And what character we also introduced you in a very... in like a race, action race.

[18:13] Oh, okay. So at this point, the hit song starts back up again.

[18:18] Oh man, you knew that it was like the beat drop for a second or it was like the moment right before the slams kick in in a brutal death metal song.

[18:25] So in the... the bus is outpaced by a lone masked figure riding in a motorized wheelchair.

[18:34] A wheelchair that has a bumper sticker on the back that says,

[18:37] Wheelchairs need room to zoom.

[18:40] I don't know where that's from.

[18:42] And then we...

[18:43] Wait, I have backstory on that actor.

[18:45] Okay.

[18:46] And I don't have my phone in front of me.

[18:49] Sitting around trading tales with all those two actors.

[18:52] That's the kid that played little Earl.

[18:54] There was a little Earl and big Earl on What's Happening.

[18:57] And he was the kid that used to hit on Dee.

[19:01] And he would be like... he would like wink at her.

[19:03] Oh, you can't see that I'm like...

[19:04] No, she's nudging your elbows right now.

[19:06] He would wink at her and he would be like, you and me.

[19:09] And, you know, she would be like, scram, kid.

[19:12] And of course, later we'll meet the older brother from the Wonder Years who's just one of the kids.

[19:16] And of course, I've got an interesting Paul Rudman story as long as we're trading stories.

[19:20] It seems he decided to go out and catch a flick at a local theater.

[19:24] This was not your...

[19:25] Do a spin a tale.

[19:26] It's not an ordinary type of film.

[19:28] There he is.

[19:29] His popcorn in one hand and a probably generously sized soda in the other.

[19:33] And he decided that he would free his hands for a little bit of extracurricular activity.

[19:38] Anyway...

[19:41] Sorry, Stuart.

[19:43] Was that before they had like little spots to put your soda and popcorn on the armrest?

[19:49] Here's the interesting thing.

[19:50] So you had to put them on the ground?

[19:51] You had to put the soda around and you had to put the popcorn in his lap.

[19:54] Was there a hole in the bottom of the...

[19:56] Apparently there was and that's where the trouble begins.

[20:00] gave him a popcorn bucket with a hole in it, and apparently his pants were particularly weak

[20:06] and perhaps worn through by all of the stunts and shenanigans that he does in his playhouse.

[20:12] When he saw the menu and it offered bottomless popcorn bucket, he thought nothing of it.

[20:18] He assumed it was just going to be unlimited popcorn, but in fact...

[20:21] He said, oh, I love free refills. I do, I must say, because he loves Ed Grimley Jr.

[20:26] He was always quoting Ed Grimley Jr. in his spare time.

[20:29] Very strange, because some might say he's sort of a lower budget version of his popular character, Pee Wee Herman.

[20:36] And I think that's why he felt like a real connection to it.

[20:39] There is the funniest thing I ever saw Pee Wee Herman do, and I'm a big Pee Wee Herman fan.

[20:42] I loved his show as a kid.

[20:44] Are you going to say, fart in the face of Jeffrey Rush, Oscar winner?

[20:48] Not what I was going to say. When did he do that?

[20:52] In Mystery Men.

[20:54] It was Jeffrey Rush's follow-up role to the one that won him an Academy Award.

[20:58] Is that true, that it was right after Shine?

[21:00] Yeah.

[21:01] Oh, okay.

[21:02] When he plays Casanova, Frank, it's not in Mystery Men.

[21:05] It just shows that he has a lot of range.

[21:07] He was a quick-fire judge on Top Chef once, and he's like, I love pancakes.

[21:13] Make me some pancakes.

[21:15] And he goes to the first chef, and he's like, these are, without a doubt, the greatest pancakes I've ever had.

[21:21] And they're like, oh, thank you.

[21:22] And he goes to the next people and tries, and he goes, these are, without a doubt, the greatest pancakes I've ever had.

[21:27] And he said it to every single chef, and by the end, they were like, just say it, whatever.

[21:32] It was so shitting all over the whole concept of them competing in pancakes.

[21:38] But okay, so they get to camp, right?

[21:40] So we watch a bus try and outrace a wheelchair to no avail.

[21:45] We get to the camp.

[21:46] We get to Camp Sasquatch, and that's when Stuart got very excited because star of Empty Nest himself, Richard Mulligan, comes out.

[21:54] Yeah, he is great.

[21:55] As the head of the camp, Giddy?

[21:59] Giddy.

[22:00] Was he in the first movie?

[22:01] Since, as Dan said, this is an unrelated film.

[22:03] I think he's the Bill Murray.

[22:05] I have to assume he was named, he was in kind of a prophecy named for the catchiest but also most annoying song from Sparks' last album, Hippopotamus,

[22:16] a song called Giddy, or I think called Giddy Giddy, which I love but which drives anyone who's not me or my son insane upon listening to it.

[22:22] So his name is Giddy.

[22:23] Sure.

[22:24] So we're introduced to some more characters.

[22:25] Maybe short for Gideon.

[22:27] Gideon, yeah.

[22:28] Sounds like a comic book character.

[22:30] We're introduced to two new characters.

[22:32] They're a pair of counselors.

[22:34] We have Jamie and Fanny, and now Jamie, his character, his goal is constantly to try and get Fanny alone so that they can consummate their relationship,

[22:45] and he makes allusions to her chest quite a bit.

[22:49] Now, Jamie is played by Archie Han, who you might remember as being a character actor in several Joe Dante movies.

[22:58] Okay.

[22:59] To give us some parts.

[23:01] In Gremlins 2, he's one of the guys in the control room.

[23:03] We're making fun of him for how ridiculous.

[23:06] Oh, but he's like, so what if you're on an airplane and it's going over the time step?

[23:08] Exactly.

[23:09] And Fanny is played by Misty Rowe, who was one of the ladies in Hee Haw and later a Playboy Woman of the Month.

[23:18] Anyway.

[23:19] Playboy Woman of the Month?

[23:21] Yeah.

[23:22] This is your wheelhouse.

[23:25] Look, I find the term playmate demeaning, but I will mention that she was in Playboy.

[23:31] And you spell woman with a Y, and you say Playboy Woman of the Month.

[23:38] I also want to mention, I just saw in my notes, that the wheelchair kid is named Tommy McPhee, which never comes up again, I think.

[23:44] So they make a big stink about his name.

[23:46] We now get a little bit of a montage of different kids arriving and being dropped off at camp.

[23:52] There's a lot of bits.

[23:53] We're introduced to a couple of twins.

[23:57] And this is when I started getting a little distracted because Elaine Boosler shows up to warn her daughter about the perils of men.

[24:06] And she delivers the two good jokes in the movie to my way of thinking.

[24:11] I actually found her lines funny.

[24:13] Yeah, because she's Elaine Boosler.

[24:14] Total dreamboat.

[24:15] And then we get that scene where a pair of brace-faced teens are making out and rips the braces off of one another, which is a little early in the movie for body horror.

[24:25] But I guess you could do that.

[24:26] Yeah, Cronenberg dropped by the set one day.

[24:28] They let him direct the shot.

[24:29] Yeah, the Saska sisters stepped in for this one.

[24:32] The real horror is how much it's going to cost to fix those braces.

[24:35] I get to make that joke.

[24:36] I'm a dad.

[24:37] No?

[24:38] Okay.

[24:39] We're introduced to a kid who's super into taxidermy.

[24:41] You know, the normal thing.

[24:42] A little candy-dealing kid who has a briefcase full of candy.

[24:45] He's a black market candy dealer.

[24:47] And in general, at least I got the feeling like these were all city kids who were just out in the boonies for summer.

[24:56] Which is what summer camp is.

[24:58] There's no reason to go.

[24:59] I mean, not me.

[25:00] I grew up in Indiana, which was a fairly rural area.

[25:02] But you didn't go to camp.

[25:04] Well, I went to day camps, and I went to soccer camp.

[25:08] No, that's not the same.

[25:09] I grew up in Noteworthyville, Illinois.

[25:12] Actual name, Eureka.

[25:14] This is a place that put a cover story about Dan in the newspaper.

[25:18] Now he's fucking dragging him on our show.

[25:21] Well, I mean, the town didn't do that.

[25:24] I didn't get the key to the city.

[25:26] Okay, I guess it's not good enough for you.

[25:28] Now I get why you're mad.

[25:30] Yeah, put Eureka on notice.

[25:31] Dan demands key to city.

[25:33] I'm your favorite son, not Ronald Reagan, says Dan McCoy.

[25:37] Well, he just went to college there.

[25:39] Ben Zobrist is probably the favorite.

[25:41] Who is that?

[25:42] Ben Zobrist?

[25:43] Baseball player.

[25:44] Ben Zobrist?

[25:45] Ben Zobrist.

[25:46] We just lost a sports fan.

[25:48] He's a Cubs player.

[25:49] You mean Dave?

[25:50] My brother?

[25:51] Very, very successful player for the Cubs.

[25:54] But no, my town was tiny, and I went to church camp in the summers.

[26:00] But those are not the same things.

[26:01] It's not the same.

[26:02] Well, but it's still a camp.

[26:04] My parents were religious,

[26:06] but I think that the main reason they were sending me to camp

[26:09] was the same reason anyone gets sent to camp is,

[26:11] one, get out of the house.

[26:12] So you can do it.

[26:13] Two, you should see some of the outdoors rather than do what I did,

[26:18] which was stay inside all the time playing the Nintendo Entertainment System

[26:21] and watching movies and reading.

[26:23] If your camp had Nintendo movies, it was not a camp.

[26:27] No, but that's what he did.

[26:28] I'm saying it was not.

[26:29] Oh, okay.

[26:30] I was like the kid who in, what was that?

[26:33] Fifth or sixth?

[26:34] No, it was in fourth grade where my teacher got mad at me

[26:37] because during recess I would stay in and read about reptiles and shit,

[26:42] and she's like, I want to have my lunch without a fucking kid around.

[26:47] Charlene, you and I, I think, are on the same page on this one

[26:50] because we both, I think, had the tri-state Jewish going to summer camp.

[26:54] All summer.

[26:55] Experience where you go because it's the only time you're going to do outdoor things,

[26:59] and you try to run away, and eventually you get kicked out early

[27:03] because you threw a rock through a window.

[27:05] We both had that experience, right?

[27:06] I got not invited back because I refused to swim.

[27:10] Oh, yeah, I hated swimming too.

[27:13] We have so much in common.

[27:14] I know.

[27:15] We should spend more time together.

[27:17] I don't know about that.

[27:20] So now we're introduced with the second conflict,

[27:24] the first being the conflict of Jamie versus cruel fate keeping him from Fanny.

[27:29] Keeping his penis from Fanny's vagina over and over again.

[27:32] The second main conflict is between Camp Sasquatch,

[27:36] which we've always already been introduced to,

[27:38] and the rival across the lake, Camp Patton,

[27:42] an evil military camp run by Colonel Bat Jack Hershey,

[27:47] which Bat Jack is a name where I'm like, you can name your kid that?

[27:51] Elliot, why haven't you been naming your children Bat Jacks?

[27:53] That's a good question.

[27:54] My guess is it's – actually, I don't know.

[27:57] Do you think it's a Christian name?

[27:58] Do you think it's a Christian name for kids in Jewish?

[28:04] We were like, should we name him Bat Jack?

[28:07] I was like, too goy.

[28:10] My guess is it might be that,

[28:12] and it might be just a nod to Black Jack Pershing, the World War I general.

[28:16] So we're introduced to Hershey, the guy who leads the camp,

[28:21] and he's this tiny little, like, Patton parody

[28:25] who says a lot of terribly homophobic stuff, and I cannot endorse that.

[28:29] Patton parody, Patton pivoting.

[28:32] Patton leather.

[28:33] And he is backed up by his major domo, played by John Larrakat.

[28:41] What is it, Lieutenant Foxglove?

[28:43] Yeah, I think so.

[28:44] Who is a fairly offensive –

[28:47] He's a closeted gay man.

[28:49] He is a barely closeted gay man.

[28:51] He has a gay stereotype.

[28:53] The best that can be said about this character is it could be much worse,

[28:57] knowing the year that this was made.

[28:59] Here's what I'll say about it.

[29:00] It is on its face offensive,

[29:02] and it's only, I think, because John Larrakat makes him feel like a real character to a certain extent

[29:07] that he's able to pull it off.

[29:09] And it is one of those parts that John Larrakat should not have done,

[29:13] but he manages to – for me at least,

[29:16] every joke about Foxglove or that Foxglove makes is offensive to me,

[29:19] but he manages to give the character such a sense of dignity.

[29:22] He is always above whatever is going on that I'm like,

[29:25] okay, he's imbuing this character with more than it deserves.

[29:28] It seemed like the – what, Patton?

[29:32] What was his name, the Lieutenant?

[29:34] Batjack.

[29:35] It seemed like it was almost like he was an idiot for making those jokes,

[29:40] and John Larrakat was above it.

[29:42] And he ultimately is the villain and asshole of the movie.

[29:45] And the ultimate joke is – the big joke is supposed to be that he doesn't notice that Foxglove is so obviously gay,

[29:51] and at one point lisps, and he's like, I hate lisping, or something,

[29:55] and he's like, oh, did I do it? Oh, no.

[29:57] But it is still – the jokes themselves are still gay.

[30:00] just like days exist and also by the end of it foxglove someone has to escape

[30:04] from the military camp will get to it and steals one of foxglove's dresses

[30:07] and it's like yep in the eighties i guess

[30:09] cross-dressing and being gay same exact thing every bit drag and gayness goes

[30:13] together like

[30:14] we can talk about how the real

[30:18] element of that sequence that doesn't make any sense is that

[30:21] a dress that seems to fit flash perfectly in no way would fit a

[30:25] very tall john larrakat it's also an incredibly

[30:29] it's an incredibly dowdy cocktail dress though like

[30:32] foxglove is like has a sense of style and poise about him and you'd think he'd

[30:36] wear something that

[30:37] showed off his legs for one thing maybe show off his shoulders like really

[30:40] I think it speaks more to flash picking a dress option that is maybe a little more

[30:45] demure because deep down he is like

[30:47] a fairly conservative man I guess so but it's just I'm surprised foxglove owns that

[30:51] dress and I'm gonna chalk it up to a different gay stereotype

[30:54] that he is obsessed with his dead mother and so has her clothes and that's why he's so offended at the end

[30:58] because he's like that's my mother's dress

[31:00] cool so at this point we learn that

[31:04] that flash seems to have a crush on the nice girl Cheryl

[31:08] Giddy meets with flash and tries to convince him to

[31:11] be part of the upcoming champ of the lake competition

[31:16] this is where we know this is the crux of the movie is that we know that

[31:19] everything is going to hang in the balance on the champ of the lake

[31:22] a boxing match that will uh... between them and camp

[31:26] uh... between camp sasquatch and camp padden

[31:29] uh... flash meets with his bunk which is of course is made up with all of the uh...

[31:34] the rascals we've already been introduced with

[31:36] uh... including as Dan mentioned earlier the older brother from the wonder years

[31:40] who is now Elliot

[31:42] Elliot mentioned it

[31:44] you guys are pretty similar right? look I have so much going on in my life Dan can have a go at it

[31:48] Dan's been dropping IMDB shit all day long

[31:52] getting us in the know on all these little histories

[31:54] I did a deep dive on Meatballs 2

[31:57] yeah I've been clawing my way back out of that deep dive

[31:59] it's amazing this is the one movie that Dan has been motivated to be like I gotta get to the bottom of it

[32:03] I woke up for this one

[32:05] so

[32:06] I feel like we should do all the Meatballs movies at this point

[32:09] um

[32:10] but Stuart is there uh is there

[32:13] another member of the cabin who has to show up?

[32:16] uh we'll get to that in a second

[32:18] uh yeah the girls make friends with each other there's some more homophobic stuff

[32:21] according to my notes

[32:23] is this when they talk about pinkies?

[32:24] as night falls

[32:26] okay

[32:27] night falls on the camp

[32:29] and there's one more camper that has to arrive

[32:32] that's right

[32:33] a spaceship from outer space shows up

[32:35] piloted by aliens

[32:37] meanwhile they're interrupting Jamie and Fanny

[32:40] who are just trying to get a little bit of alone time

[32:42] the aliens arrive

[32:43] they are apparently Jewish

[32:45] the mother I'm not so sure but the father is certainly very Jewish

[32:49] uh they are uh as my notes say

[32:52] good ass special effects

[32:54] the eyes on the alien costume are much better than they should be

[32:58] when it comes to blinking

[32:59] and I have to I like

[33:00] much better than the mouths certainly

[33:02] you would think that if you were designing a body

[33:05] you would want the thing that takes in nutrients and keeps the body alive

[33:09] to function better than the eyes that blink

[33:11] we don't know how it takes in nutrients

[33:13] that's true

[33:14] could be through the butt we don't know

[33:15] the thing also that you're gonna notice the most

[33:17] because the alien is talking much more than it's winking

[33:20] you think you would design

[33:21] but the I have to admit

[33:23] so the one thing that makes me think that

[33:25] the people who made this movie knew what they were doing comedy wise

[33:28] is that the alien kids voice

[33:30] is so blandly normal

[33:33] it is the only joke that I'm like admiring

[33:37] is that the alien kids are like

[33:38] yeah hey dad

[33:39] oh hey what's going on

[33:40] like that's how the alien sounds

[33:41] it's like the robot janitor and rotor

[33:43] where I was like oh there was some genius at work here

[33:46] it would be easy if he was like

[33:47] what is canoe

[33:49] but instead he's like

[33:50] yeah I don't want to go to camp dad

[33:53] it's a good bit

[33:54] and we'll get back to him later

[33:56] he disappears into the darkness

[33:59] he's barely

[34:00] you would think he would be a larger part of the movie

[34:02] he disappears for long stretches of it

[34:05] this is jumping way ahead

[34:06] but it speaks to the design of the alien

[34:08] so I want to just say this

[34:09] there's a running gag in the movie

[34:11] where the alien can walk through things

[34:14] wow you're totally bearing the lead

[34:16] on the coolest power he has

[34:17] the only power he has

[34:18] hold on

[34:19] let's go to the second coolest power

[34:21] he's got a couple powers

[34:23] one of them is he can walk through things

[34:25] and there's a scene later on

[34:26] where the kids are like

[34:27] you can't walk through things

[34:28] you can't draw attention to yourself

[34:30] despite the fact that he looks like an alien

[34:32] so that's the first

[34:33] and he's wearing a raincoat

[34:34] a bright yellow raincoat

[34:36] and a hat

[34:38] and at the end

[34:39] as he's leaving the camp for the last time

[34:42] he starts to walk through the door

[34:44] and the kids are like

[34:46] oh meatball

[34:48] or whatever

[34:51] meatball would make sense

[34:53] they're like meathead

[34:54] oh you're at it again

[34:55] he's like sorry

[34:56] and then he goes back

[34:57] and he uses his other power

[34:58] which is to telekinetically open the door

[35:01] but before he telekinetically opened the door

[35:03] I'm like how are they going to handle this one

[35:05] because this is clearly not

[35:07] he does not have an articulated arm

[35:09] that he can open a door with

[35:11] what are they going to do

[35:12] and then he's like

[35:13] oh I'll just use my other superpower

[35:15] yeah I love that scene

[35:16] where the kids got mad at him

[35:17] for just walking through trees

[35:18] and he's like

[35:20] hey you guys go on ahead

[35:22] I'm going to practice walking around stuff

[35:25] and they're like

[35:26] okay

[35:27] what kid is like

[35:28] oh okay

[35:29] we'll leave the alien we're hanging out with

[35:32] to go to fucking lunch

[35:34] the kids seem to be constantly trying to lose the alien

[35:37] they all pull out their calendars

[35:39] they're like

[35:40] we'll meet up for drinks at the club after

[35:43] we're like

[35:44] I can't miss lunch

[35:45] they're serving eggs-aronious again apparently

[35:48] I'm from another planet

[35:49] and I have magic powers

[35:50] ooh Tuesday's not good for me

[35:52] this whole week's kind of cramped

[35:54] maybe

[35:55] I don't know

[35:56] maybe let's do Wednesday

[35:57] no let's do September

[35:58] there's also

[35:59] I just want to mention that

[36:00] the way the movie handles the alien

[36:02] I have to assume that

[36:03] they first commissioned like Jack Davis

[36:06] to do a poster

[36:07] where all the characters are chasing somebody

[36:09] and he just threw in whoever he wanted

[36:11] and they were like

[36:12] shit there's an alien

[36:13] there's like a kid on a wheelchair

[36:14] out running a bus

[36:15] like I guess this is in the movie now

[36:17] we don't have enough money to make Jack Davis

[36:19] go back and make changes

[36:21] I felt like they made the movie

[36:23] and then they saw E.T.

[36:26] we gotta make an E.T.

[36:27] and they like

[36:28] had to put

[36:29] and they like threw him in at the last minute

[36:31] yeah the movie they had made

[36:32] was only I don't know

[36:33] like a trim 24 minutes long

[36:36] fuck

[36:37] we gotta throw in an E.T.

[36:38] it was a pilot for the meatball series

[36:40] they were like

[36:41] well we gotta expand it

[36:42] for the European theatrical market

[36:43] okay so we're briefly introduced

[36:45] it's the next morning

[36:46] we're briefly introduced

[36:47] to the French cook of the camp

[36:50] who is also a drinker

[36:54] there's a weird

[36:55] they don't quite understand

[36:56] the giddy is like

[36:57] no fancy foods

[36:58] I want meatloaf

[36:59] I want burgers

[37:00] but the rest of the movie

[37:01] is Rene looking at every horse

[37:03] and just trying

[37:04] trying to make it

[37:05] trying to steal

[37:06] so he can cook it

[37:07] it's a very

[37:08] it's like what's the gag

[37:09] the gag that he's a fancy French cook

[37:10] or that he eats horses

[37:11] yeah that does not make sense

[37:12] although speaking of gags

[37:13] like that's

[37:14] again

[37:15] there are a few gags

[37:16] in this movie that work for me

[37:17] and one of them is

[37:18] like seeing Rene

[37:19] like trying to carry

[37:20] half of a

[37:21] like a full dead horse

[37:22] sitting there

[37:23] like rigor mortis

[37:24] like holding the head up

[37:26] and then like dropping it

[37:28] as he's trying to put it on a gurney

[37:31] so now the

[37:32] the kids from Flash's bunk

[37:34] get into a little scuffle

[37:36] outside of the

[37:37] what the

[37:38] the bathroom

[37:39] it's like an outhouse

[37:40] yeah the outhouse

[37:41] because somebody's been in there too long

[37:42] they need to go to the bathroom

[37:43] so our friend in the wheelchair

[37:46] hooks up a grappling hook

[37:47] or a grapnel

[37:48] to the door

[37:50] I'll pull the door open

[37:51] they pull it open of course

[37:52] hiding inside

[37:53] is the

[37:54] kid who can face through walls

[37:56] that's right

[37:57] Meathead

[37:58] our alien friend

[37:59] they meet with him

[38:00] they talk to him

[38:01] they seem kind of into it

[38:02] like they're pretty

[38:03] who wouldn't be

[38:04] he's an alien

[38:05] but they're

[38:06] and they're accepting of him

[38:07] but how did he get his name?

[38:08] so one of the characters is named Ted

[38:10] I think

[38:11] and he goes

[38:12] me Ted

[38:13] and the kid goes

[38:14] me Ted

[38:15] and they're like

[38:16] that's his name I guess

[38:17] Meathead

[38:18] and the funny thing is that like

[38:19] he's pretty adept at all other

[38:21] aspects of English language

[38:23] he just speaks English

[38:24] at one point they're like

[38:25] you wanna go do this?

[38:27] I'd rather eat a Big Mac

[38:29] and then of course at that point

[38:30] I'm sure McDonald's paid for that

[38:32] because like

[38:33] that's huge product placement

[38:35] yeah well that's a

[38:36] a friend of mine

[38:37] Kevin Mar

[38:38] he has a theory that

[38:40] Mac and Me

[38:41] that meat

[38:42] it was that

[38:43] Mac and Me I think was a rip off

[38:44] of Meatballs 2

[38:45] not of E.T.

[38:46] because Meatballs 2 introduced the idea

[38:47] of an alien eating a hamburger

[38:49] it's weird that

[38:50] and his father says at one point like

[38:51] oh I gave you those English lessons

[38:53] for

[38:54] so that you'd have a reason to use them

[38:55] so like

[38:56] why they have this like

[38:57] I don't understand

[38:58] it doesn't make sense

[38:59] I don't know

[39:00] well and I don't know why

[39:01] they're making all this effort

[39:02] to explain why he knows English

[39:04] and you're like

[39:05] it doesn't matter

[39:06] he's a fucking alien

[39:07] look

[39:08] the planet of the apes

[39:09] the apes know English

[39:10] and Charlton Heston

[39:11] never puts fucking

[39:12] two and two together

[39:13] on earth

[39:14] he takes the Statue of Liberty

[39:15] for him to realize

[39:16] oh you mean English

[39:17] didn't arise naturally

[39:18] on this ape planet

[39:19] the same way it did here

[39:20] Charlton Heston

[39:21] is a huge dumbass alien

[39:22] I mean he's an astronaut

[39:23] so he can't be that dumb

[39:24] but on the other hand

[39:25] he is an astronaut

[39:26] who doesn't seem to know

[39:27] like how to wear clothes

[39:28] well he is from

[39:29] I believe

[39:31] also this alien

[39:32] is attending the summer camp

[39:34] because his parents

[39:35] want him to go to

[39:36] summer camp on earth

[39:37] but their like thing

[39:38] is like just to like

[39:39] drop him

[39:40] like they didn't

[39:41] they didn't pay for

[39:42] they didn't register

[39:43] like they're just like

[39:44] basically being like

[39:45] it'd be like

[39:46] if you Elliot

[39:47] like as your

[39:48] as Sammy got older

[39:49] just like pushed him out

[39:50] like near a summer camp

[39:51] he's like

[39:52] figure it out kid

[39:53] hey sink or swim

[39:54] I'm sure there's a

[39:55] Dark Horse comic postulating

[39:56] that's what happened

[39:57] to the predator

[39:58] in the movie

[40:00] What would happen if a kid just showed up at camp?

[40:04] I mean, they'd probably call the parents or the police.

[40:07] Or devour him in some kind of ritual. I'll tell you what happens when a kid disappears from camp.

[40:12] They call your parents and they make you go home. Yeah, yeah. Because they don't want you to leave without permission.

[40:16] I left without permission a few times, but I came back.

[40:19] Oh, see, I left to go and I got in trouble.

[40:22] They're like, you stole a bindle from our bindle room?

[40:26] They found me around a barrel fire, tailing my tail to a bunch of other bows, and eating beans out of a can.

[40:34] You made a little fake beard out of soot?

[40:37] Yeah, well my parents were most mad that I took my new good hiking boots and I cut the toes out so that I would have hobo boots.

[40:44] Yeah, hobo boots. Hobo boots.

[40:47] Cool, so we now, you know, it's the next day.

[40:50] Flash follows Nancy and Cheryl, who he is interested in, to the gym where they are having a really cool aerobics class that devolves into madness.

[41:01] This is another question I have. There seem to be a lot of activities for the counselors at this camp.

[41:07] Yeah, not a lot for the kids.

[41:09] Are the female characters campers or counselors? I couldn't tell.

[41:12] I thought they were counselors.

[41:13] That's a pretty good question. Is Cheryl a camper? Because then if a counselor in training is hounding after her, that brings up some strange power dynamics.

[41:23] I've never seen her with kids.

[41:24] I assumed she was a counselor because I feel like there are two levels of ages of people at this camp.

[41:30] That's true.

[41:31] She's probably another C.I.G.

[41:33] It's just strange. There's a whole aerobics class just for counselor-aged people.

[41:38] Yeah.

[41:39] So at this point, Flash meets with...

[41:41] I think they're supposed to be campers.

[41:43] You think so?

[41:44] Because Fanny is the counselor over them.

[41:46] Just like Flash is the counselor over his kids.

[41:49] They're tiny little kids.

[41:50] But he could be a C.I.T. and they could be the oldest campers. That could kind of work.

[41:54] Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of ethical boundaries that we don't want to think about.

[41:58] Yeah, that happens.

[41:59] And the scene where Giddy kisses the kid in the wheelchair is not okay.

[42:02] Wait, what?

[42:03] No, that didn't happen.

[42:04] Did I fall asleep? I missed that scene.

[42:07] So Flash gets in a boxing match with Boomer, Camp Sasquatch's resident boxing champion,

[42:12] who's kind of like a dumb Rocky Balboa type.

[42:15] And I couldn't figure out if he was a camper or a counselor.

[42:17] He seems to just be the camp's boxer and resident.

[42:19] He's like 35 years old.

[42:20] Yeah, he's this older guy who's just a boxer and it's like...

[42:23] Is he like a handyman?

[42:24] Yeah, he's the handyman.

[42:26] He's the guy who drives the van.

[42:27] Because the only thing we ever see him do is box and have a canoe on his head

[42:33] and he can't see where he's going and he's going in the wrong direction.

[42:35] So after the gym, we cut to a scene in the women's bunk.

[42:38] This is an important sequence because we learn an important...

[42:41] It's similar to when you're watching or reading A Clockwork Orange

[42:44] and you're trying to understand the dialect.

[42:46] At this point, we've been introduced to the term pinkies.

[42:49] And in my head, I think of, of course...

[42:52] Baby mice.

[42:53] Baby mice that are fed to other larger animals.

[42:55] But in this case, no.

[42:57] We learn that pinkies means a man's penis.

[43:01] So they're looking at pinkies, just to use their terminology,

[43:04] in a Playgirl magazine.

[43:06] A Playgirl magazine that touts an interview with Sally Field on the cover.

[43:12] That's really why they have it.

[43:13] And we realize that Cheryl's...

[43:15] Though Cheryl has a mysterious past that hopefully will be explained

[43:19] over the course of the movie,

[43:20] she may have never seen a pinky before.

[43:23] So Nancy decides to help Cheryl

[43:26] and the rest of the bunk kind of band with her.

[43:28] Their goal is to let her see a pinky.

[43:30] So it's kind of like a gender swap

[43:31] on the traditional screwballs type sex comedy.

[43:35] I gotta say, I do enjoy that this is a movie

[43:39] where the women are the horny ones.

[43:41] They're the ones driving that plot.

[43:44] But it also gives you a hint to the tone of this movie,

[43:47] which is sex comedy with all the sex scenes edited out.

[43:52] Because you kind of keep thinking

[43:54] that this is going to be an 80s T&A comedy

[43:58] and then it never gets around to any of that.

[44:01] I didn't find any T.

[44:02] Damn, didn't see any A.

[44:04] And the ampersand in the middle?

[44:05] Well, don't even talk to me about it.

[44:08] Very mad.

[44:09] No, it's a...

[44:10] It feels like they are trying to...

[44:12] Yeah, they're trying to do a sex comedy for kids,

[44:14] which is...

[44:15] But that's like...

[44:16] No, it feels like they're like,

[44:17] oh, USA Up All Night always plays sex comedy

[44:20] with the stuff edited out.

[44:22] Let's just do their work for them.

[44:24] It's also like...

[44:25] There was no USA Up All Night yet.

[44:28] They had to write a Cassandra and stuff.

[44:34] It's one of those movies that...

[44:36] It gives a really skewed view

[44:38] of what summer camp is like.

[44:40] It seems like the kids have the run of the place

[44:42] and also that kids are just having sex with each other,

[44:45] I guess, or plotting these things.

[44:47] At some point, the counselors were certainly running off

[44:50] to have sex with each other sometimes, I guess.

[44:52] But the kids were mostly busy...

[44:55] I don't know, doing kid stuff.

[44:57] Just being kids.

[44:58] Making bracelets, playing games.

[45:00] Yeah, playing games.

[45:01] Joining the Burger King Kids Club.

[45:03] Yeah, being IQ or wheels.

[45:06] We see the kids from the bunk

[45:09] have taken Meathead, the alien kid,

[45:11] to an outhouse graveyard

[45:14] where they make the decision to have him live, I guess.

[45:18] They abandon this pretty quickly.

[45:21] They're like, go live in this toilet.

[45:23] I feel like this movie in a nutshell

[45:25] is encapsulated in this scene

[45:27] where an alien says, did somebody fart?

[45:29] And I'm like, that's this movie.

[45:31] An alien asking if somebody farted.

[45:34] Cut to across the lake

[45:36] where the leader of that camp

[45:38] is meeting with a racist caricature

[45:41] of a Native American chief

[45:43] who is offering up water rights to the lake.

[45:48] I guess for whatever reason

[45:50] he hands over the deed to the lake.

[45:52] I don't know what he's giving them in return.

[45:54] He's not really established.

[45:56] He's somehow wheedled this out of...

[45:58] Luckily that character doesn't show up at all

[46:00] until the very end for what I thought

[46:02] was a pretty good joke.

[46:04] Stay tuned.

[46:06] Starring John Ritter.

[46:08] We see the Camp Patton military guys

[46:12] riding over in boats to Camp Sasquatch.

[46:15] They start immediately laying down razor wire

[46:19] and ushering kids off of the docks.

[46:21] And the head of the camp

[46:23] meets with Giddy

[46:25] and he starts making ultimatums.

[46:27] Meanwhile we do get the good joke

[46:29] of who's the...

[46:31] Renee is taking a

[46:33] comically dead fake horse

[46:35] out of a truck

[46:37] titled Belmont Steaks.

[46:39] Which is genuinely a pretty good joke.

[46:43] It's kind of not played enough

[46:45] to be the joke that I think the movie wants to be.

[46:47] But I think that we're to believe

[46:49] that the good...

[46:51] Richard Mulligan is that his name?

[46:53] I can't believe you have to ask

[46:55] Richard Mulligan's name.

[46:57] He starred in the best spinoff of Golden Girls

[46:59] that there was.

[47:01] Empty Nest.

[47:03] He lived across the street from the Golden Girls.

[47:05] He was also in a Sleepaway Camp movie.

[47:09] The gag here is supposed to be

[47:11] that Richard Mulligan

[47:13] is running this touchy-feely

[47:15] camp.

[47:17] They don't play that up quite as much

[47:19] as they play up the military nature

[47:21] of the bad camp.

[47:23] But that's supposed to be the comic contrast.

[47:25] They needed a scene where they talk about nature

[47:27] or a scene where they talk about

[47:29] it doesn't matter if you win or lose

[47:31] you just gotta have fun.

[47:33] How does a touchy-feely camp

[47:35] if everybody is sentenced to go there

[47:37] as their jail time?

[47:39] It's a much more Scandinavian

[47:41] view of rehabilitation of prisoners.

[47:44] It's not about punishment.

[47:46] It's about reforming this person

[47:48] into a member of society, a contributor.

[47:50] That makes sense.

[47:52] I mentioned stakes earlier.

[47:54] This is where we get the stakes of the movie.

[47:56] The stakes of the movie

[47:58] is that by the end of the summer

[48:00] Camp Patton will own the rights

[48:02] to the lake

[48:04] and they're going to have to most likely

[48:06] close Camp Sasquatch

[48:08] because you can't have a camp without a lake.

[48:10] However, the tables are quickly turned

[48:12] and he surprises us by

[48:14] dressing up some of his counselors

[48:16] as Hare Krishnas

[48:18] who caper about on the shore

[48:20] which makes the head of Camp Patton come over

[48:22] worried that those Hare Krishnas

[48:24] are going to ruin his camp, I guess.

[48:26] Yeah, and Gideon is like

[48:28] what use is a camp without a lake?

[48:30] So I'm selling the camp to them

[48:32] and they can build their temple here.

[48:34] The head of Camp Patton, even though he has met

[48:36] Paul Reubens' character, doesn't seem to realize

[48:38] that Paul Reubens is the leader of these Hare Krishnas.

[48:40] He flicked him off right before he walked

[48:42] into the room.

[48:44] And it's not like you could say, well, he's used to seeing Paul Reubens with hair.

[48:46] He's not.

[48:48] He's used to seeing him with an aviator's cap on.

[48:50] So he looks almost exactly the same

[48:52] when he's wearing a bald cap pretending to be a Hare Krishna.

[48:54] Yeah, so Gideon lays down an ultimatum.

[48:56] He says, I will not

[48:58] sell the camp if

[49:00] you let us

[49:02] determine who owns the lake

[49:04] by who wins the Champ of the Lake

[49:06] boxing competition.

[49:08] Which we mentioned earlier that we're very excited about.

[49:10] Which was a really poor business negotiation.

[49:12] Because if he had him over

[49:14] a barrel like that, he should have just said

[49:16] we want use

[49:18] of the lake.

[49:20] Why put the stakes so high?

[49:24] And also considering that Camp Patton later on

[49:26] sees nothing wrong with kidnapping people.

[49:28] And throwing grenades at people.

[49:30] It's like children are walking around with grenades.

[49:32] And then like, I don't understand why this was such an issue.

[49:34] Yeah.

[49:36] Almost immediately,

[49:38] Camp Patton hires

[49:40] Sergeant Pallidate

[49:42] cool name

[49:44] to go and neutralize

[49:46] Boomer, the camp Sasquatch's

[49:48] resident boxing guy

[49:50] and dummy guy.

[49:52] We then get a dance party that is

[49:54] filled almost entirely with

[49:56] adults and a few children.

[49:58] There's many mustaches in evidence.

[50:00] The one thing that rang true to me is that at my summer camps they were always making us do dances

[50:04] nobody wanted to do. So Flash is there, he tries to impress Charlotte, Flash's friend

[50:10] Eddie, Cheryl my mistake, Flash's friend Eddie starts dancing with Nancy, you know everybody's

[50:17] hooking up. The Sgt. Paladin from Camp Patton brings a elite team of military kids. Let's

[50:27] call them kid commandos. Kid commandos, he dumps out a big bag of brass knuckles for them all to use

[50:34] they wait for Boomer to finish getting ready. Boomer who we've established is dumb and also

[50:39] apparently has a real body odor issue because he keeps putting on deodorant and then smelling

[50:44] himself and being not happy with the results. They trick him by claiming that they are him in the

[50:51] bushes. They say it's Boomer here so he goes to investigate then they beat him

[50:57] within an inch of his life with brass knuckles breaking his arm. These are kids and they hit

[51:03] him so hard his arm broke. Maybe Sgt. Paladin took care of that part.

[51:08] They must practice the Fist of the North Star over there. So Jamie and Fanny at the same time are trying

[51:13] to get alone while at the same time Nancy convinces Eddie to surprise Cheryl.

[51:21] Here's one of the weird things about it is that they set up a very kind of

[51:26] semi-elaborate prank while the camp is having a viewing of the movie Shockwaves which is a horror

[51:31] movie about Nazi zombies that come out of a lake and kill people and it is a strange choice for

[51:38] a movie night at a summer camp with kids. It is a theater that is very well lit.

[51:43] I believe I can explain that choice. I'm sure it's a movie that either

[51:48] someone who made this movie was involved with or they bought the rights.

[51:50] Yes the director of this is the director of Shockwaves.

[51:53] Okay now when I was a kid we did it in summer camp we did a thing once a summer

[51:57] where everybody had a big sleepover in the cafeteria when the kids were awake

[52:01] they watched we watched you know a kid movie then when the younger kids went to Fern Gully

[52:06] or something it was one year where it's Fern Gully then I didn't watch the movie I've talked

[52:10] about before about how I've never seen all Fern Gully then the younger kids went to sleep and

[52:14] then we watched The Great Outdoors and then when those kids went to sleep the counselors and

[52:18] whichever kids were still awake I guess watched Stripes and it was like only back now I'm like

[52:22] it wasn't like the kids were in a different room they were all just there but asleep while Stripes

[52:26] was playing but yeah 80s pg or 70 79 I think yeah that's it's kind of like when I was watching

[52:31] Chernobyl at home with my wife Charlene asleep on the couch next to me and there were episodes

[52:37] there were episodes where I'm like dear god I hope Charlene does not open her eyes for but a

[52:42] moment like a dragon from Secret of Nimb so she convinces Eddie to to uh to what streak or like

[52:50] open streak through the girl's cabin and with the implication being if you streak through the

[52:55] girl's cabin and Cheryl sees your penis I'm gonna have sex with you and and at that point her curse

[53:00] will be lifted she'll have let Cheryl see a pinky and that she her work is done now she can leave

[53:06] this earth plane yeah um and or maybe or maybe he thinks that the women will just be driven so

[53:11] crazy that he'll achieve every guy's dream of being torn to shreds like at the end of the

[53:15] block guys think that like if they can get someone to see their penis they won't be able to control

[53:21] I mean that is what many that's what many men believe I feel like most of my rides on the

[53:25] subway have proven that to be they believe that women have the same reaction to male genitals

[53:30] that men have to female genitals which is a complete loss of control or mental or mental

[53:35] problems we start saying hello to a nurse who isn't even there our eyeballs pop out of the

[53:41] sockets and you're like that's enough our tongues get lengthened and fall on the ground and we don't

[53:46] even mind that our tongues are touching the ground which is disgusting and because before we know it

[53:51] our heads turn into a steam whistle from an old factory and it's like how does our brain fit in

[53:55] there where did our eyes go I don't understand the heat involved or require that kind of a steam

[54:00] whistle to function would be certainly dangerous for a human body at the very least you'd be

[54:04] instantly dehydrated worst case scenario stroke in a moment but I think what men forget is often

[54:10] I just want to before we go I think what men forget is that the female body is beautiful

[54:14] and the male body as I forget was it was it Elaine Boosler or Rita Roderick I forget who what which

[54:18] comedian referred to it as looking like a half decorated Christmas tree so now we have the plan

[54:25] Fanny and Jamie have made plans to hook up finally finding some alone time in this whirlwind of

[54:33] campers and Eddie is going to surprise Cheryl by showing up in their bunk naked however what

[54:40] they did not count on are pranks everyone's a kill his heel right that's right those kids

[54:49] we had talked about earlier swapped the removable bunk signs the numbers of the front of those

[54:56] bunks so as you know assuming that these love crazed maniacs that would show up uh would not

[55:04] notice now here's where we switcheroo uh that would not be out of place in a midsummer night's

[55:09] dream yeah no yeah there's something about this bit that also punctures another subplot of the

[55:15] movie because they move the numbers on the bunks between the girl's cabin and Fanny's cabin ah

[55:22] here's the rub Fanny has her own cabin and what's what's what's jack what's flash no no what's the

[55:28] what's the guy who's always trying to have sex with flash no no no Jamie Jamie is constantly

[55:33] trying to find a place to have sex with Fanny why doesn't he do it in her private room well well

[55:39] part two i believe i believe we've come to the end of this case as its exhibit a meatballs i find you

[55:48] guilty of being dumb so uh so we get we get the scene of Jamie and Eddie kind of like crossing

[55:57] paths and crisscrossing not knowing where they're going and Charlene pointed out the uh the best

[56:02] part is when Jamie's about to go into the bunk and he like rubs his hands together with like a

[56:07] little yummy face uh so he goes rubbing his hands he's like i'm gonna have something great

[56:14] and so they both go into the wrong cabin finally the sweetest treat human affection

[56:22] truly he's like oh if Thornton Wilder was right in the bridge of St. Louis

[56:25] and love is the bridge then i'll be experiencing it tonight sweet effervescent euphoria

[56:32] so uh they you know they show up they uh Eddie flashes a newly awoken Fanny

[56:40] Jamie is in a camp full of uh what i can only assume are much younger women and they're terrified

[56:45] he's in his of course union suit uh underwear yeah he's wearing this like crazy it's also

[56:52] it's summer camp it's summer without the pan it's like it looks like it's a classic butt flap

[56:59] like long underwear like like a prospector would wear on the range

[57:10] i guess they ordered he called the tailor and he said get me the most comical night garments

[57:15] i mean at this point Jamie has been like he has been trying to he's been waiting for this

[57:20] moment for so long we can only assume but the thing is whenever the plan gets thwarted she

[57:25] gets so mad at him she's very mad like she she's wanting to be alone with him and that and then

[57:32] he's like okay i'll set this up and then when they get interrupted she's like how dare you and she

[57:37] like slaps his face i mean he's also not very good in the clutch because he always whenever

[57:42] he gets flustered he starts referring to her breasts he's like oh but i love them i mean you

[57:47] that kind of thing uh now of course and but he gets off easy because how does she respond to eddie

[57:53] shoving his penis oh so she grabs the double barrel shotgun which is a perch right next to

[57:58] her bed stand which seems like a strange for a camp counselor very much so we learned there's a

[58:03] bear issue i mean it's called camp sasquatch and i assume because someone shot a sasquatch

[58:10] and the head is mounted above the boxing ring and they figure that harry's family will be back to

[58:15] try to get them harry's family you might think they're called the henderson's they're not the

[58:19] henderson's are the human family that harry starts to live with the end hence the title

[58:24] harry and the henderson's not harry henderson a sasquatch who has a family

[58:33] that would be so funny in the scene where they're like there's only one thing we can do and john

[58:36] lithgow shaves harry's body and puts like a beanie cap with a big lollipop in his hand

[58:41] about his adopted son now elliot now what if harry's law instead of a kathy bates

[58:49] was harry from harry and the henderson's as a lawyer i mean it's basically unfrozen cable

[58:54] lawyer at that point yeah i challenge you to watch anything on tv and check out the

[59:00] actor's imdb page and not see that the last thing they did was harry's

[59:05] that seems to be a running game almost always the case you mean the last thing they did like and

[59:10] then they died afterwards no like if you go like three projects down it's like oh harry's law like

[59:16] where do we know this guy let's check imdb oh my god they were on an episode of harry's law

[59:24] was she harry i think she was harry bates was harry yeah okay and with the henderson's in it

[59:31] no i mean i don't know that was why it was punctually amusing for me to slam them together

[59:41] no that's harry that's a different word i think it's kind of a joke i think they call him harry

[59:46] because he's hairy maybe like meathead there's a scene he like there maybe john lithgow is reading

[59:51] a book about harry yesterday david mccullough's biography of truman and instead of saying truman

[59:55] he says harry because that's what he's thinking yeah yeah he makes that

[1:00:00] that's when the uh... exclamation when he's reading the book

[1:00:03] we have to mention that

[1:00:04] david mccullough when he saw that the truman show starring jim carrey was coming

[1:00:07] he was like well jim carrey is a strange choice to play the president i wrote a twelve hundred page book on

[1:00:12] but i can't wait to see it and he got his popped corn and a generously large soda

[1:00:16] oh no, why didn't he go to the stage?

[1:00:19] and didn't even see the movie because he was so horrified at what paul rubens was doing

[1:00:22] in the row over and he walked out and to this day david mccullough still thinks the truman show

[1:00:27] is about president harry truman and now you know the rest of the story

[1:00:31] harry's law lasted only for thirty four episodes by the way

[1:00:34] thirty four episodes of harry's law

[1:00:37] it's a better run than like uh... capital critters

[1:00:39] look you know it's two seasons i think or a season and a half maybe

[1:00:42] it's more than beloved animated show tuka and birdie dan

[1:00:45] awww

[1:00:46] tuka and birdie

[1:00:47] oh did that get cancelled?

[1:00:48] it got cancelled

[1:00:49] oh i'm sorry to hear that

[1:00:50] so the next day

[1:00:51] is birdie going to be okay?

[1:00:53] well tuka's got other projects lined up

[1:00:55] i don't know

[1:00:57] you know what i'm just glad

[1:00:58] if we get any episodes of a show about two ladybirds who live in a world where buildings have boobs

[1:01:03] then i feel like america has done its job

[1:01:05] so you know let's be thankful for what we had

[1:01:10] is that what ladybird is about?

[1:01:11] tuka and birdie?

[1:01:12] flash?

[1:01:13] because it is two friends right?

[1:01:14] oh boy

[1:01:15] flash finally has a little bit of alone time in the bunk

[1:01:18] so he whips out a little joint and starts smoking the devil's weed

[1:01:23] thinking he's all alone

[1:01:24] not so my friend

[1:01:26] he is joined by meathead the alien

[1:01:29] who phases through the wall like shadowcat

[1:01:32] and flash is only barely phased because of the aforementioned reefer

[1:01:35] he sees meathead

[1:01:37] he looks at the joint like a hobo might look at a bottle of mad dog 2020 in a paper bag

[1:01:46] and he decides to throw it away

[1:01:48] but luckily meathead shows that he has other powers

[1:01:51] he has telekinesis

[1:01:52] so he catches the joint mid-air

[1:01:54] and then being a child puts it in his mouth and starts smoking it

[1:01:58] which makes him float up to the ceiling of the cabin

[1:02:01] it was the 80's

[1:02:03] so much stuff was new in the 80's

[1:02:05] blowjobs, marijuana, they just didn't know how these things made people react

[1:02:09] so then the kids show up and are like

[1:02:11] meathead what's going on?

[1:02:12] meathead obviously he was only high in the figurative sense

[1:02:15] or the literal sense i suppose

[1:02:17] that's how aliens get high

[1:02:20] oh that makes so much more sense

[1:02:22] if only ripley had used that tactic

[1:02:24] same way like goats don't get poison ivy

[1:02:26] wait if ripley had

[1:02:28] well yeah goats don't get poison ivy that's why they have to eat them

[1:02:30] so ripley if she had gotten the alien like super high

[1:02:34] like that would have solved the problem

[1:02:36] because the problem is the alien is eating people right

[1:02:40] so if it's super high it's going to eat more people

[1:02:42] no it's going to float up to the sky

[1:02:44] we've already addressed what

[1:02:46] I mean but she kind of does that without the drugs by shooting it out of the airlock

[1:02:50] I feel like that's a lot of work

[1:02:52] like in the Nostromo I don't know what float up to the sky means

[1:02:54] it's just going to be bumping his head

[1:02:56] there's no up in space

[1:02:58] I mean that's the thing and then you've got an alien that just

[1:03:00] I guess hopefully it's a high enough ceiling that when he lunges at you

[1:03:02] you can just duck down you know

[1:03:04] and just laugh at him

[1:03:06] I mean it depends on the budget

[1:03:08] oh what the Nostromo?

[1:03:10] we've already seen that he can go up in the roof

[1:03:12] and then just drop down and kill harry dean stanton

[1:03:14] in that room that's full of wet chains for some reason

[1:03:16] Dan why does the Nostromo

[1:03:18] a spaceship have a room full of wet chains

[1:03:20] I don't understand

[1:03:22] what's in that room

[1:03:24] why are they shooting the grind in that room

[1:03:26] yeah they're shooting a prodigy video in there

[1:03:28] I assume that number one

[1:03:30] it's just their chain storage room

[1:03:32] that's where they store their chains

[1:03:34] and number two the room is so big

[1:03:36] that it has it's own condensation that creates

[1:03:38] alright that's fair

[1:03:40] that's better than how the trash compactor

[1:03:42] on the death star has both

[1:03:44] organic waste and metal waste

[1:03:46] which means does the empire recycle poop

[1:03:48] and that's like

[1:03:50] the recycling I don't understand

[1:03:52] because if so who's the real bad guy

[1:03:54] so the other camp

[1:03:56] the other young campers show up

[1:03:58] they realize that flash has already seen their friend

[1:04:00] meathead and you know

[1:04:02] they explain everything

[1:04:04] and flash realizes you know

[1:04:06] maybe he's been a bad counselor this summer

[1:04:08] well whatever

[1:04:10] he even has trouble

[1:04:12] when they introduce their alien friend

[1:04:14] as meathead

[1:04:16] he's like

[1:04:18] meat

[1:04:20] head

[1:04:22] they're words he's never heard before

[1:04:24] which is crazy because all in the family was a huge show

[1:04:26] when he was young

[1:04:28] so flash realizes the only thing he can do

[1:04:30] is volunteer to fight in the champ of the lake match

[1:04:32] sometimes it takes a meeting

[1:04:34] with an alien while you're high

[1:04:36] to get you to understand you have a responsibility

[1:04:38] to your fellow members of your community

[1:04:40] joseph campbell would call it the call

[1:04:46] he is a reluctant hero

[1:04:50] across the lake the head of camp

[1:04:52] hatton is walking around with a plate full of raw meat

[1:04:54] for some reason

[1:04:56] and then back at camp sasquatch

[1:04:58] nancy tries to trick flash into skinny dipping

[1:05:00] and boy this is where things get exciting

[1:05:02] oh you know what

[1:05:04] that's when they're watching the horror movie

[1:05:06] is when they do skinny dipping

[1:05:08] i apologize

[1:05:10] so the girls from the girls bunk trick flash

[1:05:12] into thinking he's going skinny dipping

[1:05:14] cheryl thinks she's just going to go watch look at the stars

[1:05:16] there's a lot of big dipper

[1:05:18] yeah there's a lot of big dipper innuendo

[1:05:20] she's like where can we go see the big dipper

[1:05:22] and he's like i'll show you a big dipper

[1:05:24] like i've never heard it called that before

[1:05:26] i've only heard pinky

[1:05:28] yeah i mean do i dip it in i've never done it

[1:05:30] so like is it just like a brief dip

[1:05:32] this is a nomenclature i'm previously unfamiliar with

[1:05:34] but i will assume that it refers to my penis

[1:05:36] i will never at any point say

[1:05:38] so we're skinny dipping right

[1:05:40] or otherwise assume that we might have to confirm

[1:05:42] what we're doing

[1:05:44] i'll simply take it for granted that the way nancy

[1:05:46] reported these events to me

[1:05:48] and your plans are accurate in your mind

[1:05:50] even though the things you're saying

[1:05:52] seem like they could be taken in a more innocent direction

[1:05:54] and knowing your character and personality

[1:05:56] the way you dress the way you speak

[1:05:58] how you react to me up till now

[1:06:00] it almost seems more logical

[1:06:02] you're literally talking about stars you're looking at

[1:06:04] but again i just

[1:06:06] can't even the very idea

[1:06:08] of seeing a naked female body

[1:06:10] has so suffused my brain

[1:06:12] with the inability to think logically

[1:06:14] that i'll just again believe nancy

[1:06:16] a noted liar who tricked

[1:06:18] my best friend into streaking

[1:06:20] in a way that almost got him killed

[1:06:22] and again we're tough

[1:06:24] but from the streets we've been shot at so many times

[1:06:26] before that it barely fazed him

[1:06:28] but again i should remember that my friend eddie

[1:06:30] might not exist right now

[1:06:32] because of what nancy told him

[1:06:34] and yet i am so eager to see

[1:06:36] cheryl without her clothes on that i will

[1:06:38] take it on face value

[1:06:40] do you think fanny would have lost her job

[1:06:42] if she'd shot that kicker

[1:06:44] i don't know

[1:06:46] that's a good question i mean

[1:06:48] there seems to be a different law that applies to some of the

[1:06:50] this is a standard ground state i don't know

[1:06:52] i mean it was also the 80's so men were allowed to do terrible things

[1:06:54] so women probably were too

[1:06:56] so we have a scene where there's a little bit of will they won't they

[1:06:58] and by will they won't they i mean of course

[1:07:00] go skinny dipping flash takes off

[1:07:02] goes behind a rock takes off all his clothes

[1:07:04] he jumps in the water

[1:07:06] and what do you know of course

[1:07:08] a giant bear shows up

[1:07:10] and i guess starts taking his clothes

[1:07:12] the other girls are up in a tree ready to watch

[1:07:14] the bear takes his clothes off

[1:07:16] the bear unzips and gets in

[1:07:18] and then he's like

[1:07:20] he gets water in his eyes and he can't see

[1:07:22] and he's feeling the bear's naked

[1:07:24] and grits fur skin and he's like oh

[1:07:26] sheryl you're built differently than i thought

[1:07:28] and the bear's like

[1:07:30] and he's like sheryl you're such an animal

[1:07:32] and he has sex with the bear

[1:07:34] oh no

[1:07:36] and that's how teddy ruffspin was born

[1:07:38] that's the plot of the revenant

[1:07:40] again i don't know

[1:07:42] if you watched all of the revenant

[1:07:44] it took a weird turn

[1:07:46] and by the end of it he's married

[1:07:48] to that bear

[1:07:50] on the next sound stage over jamie

[1:07:52] and fanny are trying to hook up

[1:07:54] it's clearly the same sound stage

[1:07:56] slightly redressed

[1:07:58] they move to the bush and the rock

[1:08:00] meanwhile we see

[1:08:02] camp patton's

[1:08:04] counter insurgency team sneaking into the camp

[1:08:06] i will say about that bear

[1:08:08] that happened to me once

[1:08:10] i was swimming in a creek in montana

[1:08:12] and a guy walked up

[1:08:14] and was like hey you might want to move

[1:08:16] because there's a black bear coming up this way

[1:08:18] and we were like yeah whatever

[1:08:20] and then the black bear showed up

[1:08:22] there's a bunch of women in the woods

[1:08:24] bears show up i assume to shit there

[1:08:26] okay so i guess this movie checks out

[1:08:28] yeah a plus no pinocchios

[1:08:30] delete the goop section

[1:08:32] wait that's the new

[1:08:34] standard of whether a movie is good or not

[1:08:36] weather gets pinocchios

[1:08:38] ironically pinocchio which should be a good movie

[1:08:40] does not good

[1:08:42] because it has so many pinocchios

[1:08:44] infinite pinocchios

[1:08:46] so the camp patton guys

[1:08:48] kidnap flash

[1:08:50] a naked teenager with their boat

[1:08:54] and foxglove

[1:08:56] they don't have a scene of foxglove

[1:08:58] being delighted right

[1:09:00] no that's just all in your brain

[1:09:02] so the next morning

[1:09:04] we see the sign for

[1:09:06] camp sasquatches hosting the

[1:09:08] champ of the lake competition

[1:09:10] and the sign of course reads sold out

[1:09:12] i take

[1:09:14] umbrage with that

[1:09:16] because they don't sell tickets to camp events

[1:09:18] everyone just goes

[1:09:20] there's no

[1:09:22] i guess all the people we see are campers

[1:09:24] unless they have to take money out of their

[1:09:26] their canteen

[1:09:28] you're saying that just randos

[1:09:30] in the neighborhood

[1:09:32] you don't take money out of your canteen account

[1:09:34] you punch a card

[1:09:36] but there are randos there

[1:09:38] because the native tribe is there

[1:09:40] because the chief is there

[1:09:42] and there's a bunch of weirdos

[1:09:44] that assume recruit members because they need to fill out

[1:09:46] the nature extras

[1:09:48] but maybe everyone in town has a canteen account

[1:09:50] they just punch

[1:09:52] they usually just go in and get an ice cream sandwich

[1:09:54] and punch their card

[1:09:56] but everybody's really excited for this match

[1:09:58] but for whatever reason flash hasn't

[1:10:00] I've shown up and we realize why we cut across Camp Patton where a naked Flash

[1:10:04] wakes up in Camp Patton under no guard whatsoever.

[1:10:08] They've all gone to the big game.

[1:10:10] He, uh, he slips into Fox gloves room where he finds a closet full of

[1:10:15] dresses that will matter in a moment.

[1:10:18] Oh, and now we finally find out what that raw meat is for.

[1:10:21] The raw meat is for Camp Patton's champion.

[1:10:24] That's right.

[1:10:25] A character named Ogre played by not Ogre.

[1:10:29] He's playing, uh, the character is Mad Dog played by the man who made the role

[1:10:33] Ogre from Revenge of the Nerds famous.

[1:10:35] That's Donald Gibb, my favorite member of the Beachies.

[1:10:43] So yeah, uh, yeah.

[1:10:46] I mean, I think it shows his vocal range, right?

[1:10:49] Here's the thing that I don't get about the Champ of the Lake matchup.

[1:10:52] Go on.

[1:10:52] Are we to believe that Mad Dog is a camper at Camp Patton?

[1:10:56] He's clearly not.

[1:10:58] Maybe he's a counselor.

[1:10:59] Yeah.

[1:10:59] Oh, and at one point Giddy is like, I guess I'll do it.

[1:11:01] So it's just whoever you hire or bring in to do it.

[1:11:04] Cause Mad Dog is presented to us as literally more animal than man.

[1:11:07] I mean, originally he was supposed to fight the van guy, so.

[1:11:10] Yeah.

[1:11:11] Yeah.

[1:11:12] Boomer.

[1:11:13] I assume he's the guy that drives the van to the camp.

[1:11:17] Oh yeah.

[1:11:17] Maybe he drives the Camp Patton van.

[1:11:19] Boomer talks a big game and then.

[1:11:21] It's van guy versus van guy.

[1:11:23] Boomer talks a big game and then disappoints everybody.

[1:11:25] Much like the generation that bears his name.

[1:11:28] Okay.

[1:11:28] Anyway, continue.

[1:11:29] Wow.

[1:11:30] Uh, we'll save that for another episode where we trash baby boomers.

[1:11:32] Um, so, uh, it looks like,

[1:11:36] that would be so great.

[1:11:38] This, this year's Flophouse bonus episode for the max fun.

[1:11:42] Stuart just rants about baby boomers for two hours by himself.

[1:11:46] And then he breaks out into crying, complaining about his dad.

[1:11:50] I think that's what it comes down to ultimately.

[1:11:52] This issue, the Flophouse bashes the boomers.

[1:11:55] That's what we're mad magazine rest in peace.

[1:11:57] Just like, anyway.

[1:11:58] Uh, so it looks like everything's curtains for camp Sasquatch.

[1:12:02] And then flash shows up wearing an aforementioned dress that we talked about.

[1:12:07] He gets in a boxing match with mad dog.

[1:12:10] Uh, things are going very well for me.

[1:12:15] Uh, they, and at the end of the first round, it looks like mad dogs going to win.

[1:12:19] There's a, a round card girl who walks around.

[1:12:22] Professional, like sequenced up, like grown woman with a round car.

[1:12:28] This is the joke that I had mentioned earlier where the round card girl walks by and the

[1:12:32] tribal chief whips off his sunglasses to get a better look.

[1:12:37] That's the joke you liked?

[1:12:39] Oh yeah.

[1:12:39] It's so silly and stupid because he was wearing sunglasses inside and then he whipped it like.

[1:12:44] Finally someone was looking at, why'd you show up dude?

[1:12:48] I guess to see who he's going to give the rights to the lake to.

[1:12:51] Okay.

[1:12:51] So it looks like flash is going to lose.

[1:12:54] He gets knocked to the ground and then meathead intervenes using his telekinetic

[1:12:58] powers and he overrides flashes a brain and he, and gravity and gravity and begins

[1:13:04] puppeting flashes.

[1:13:06] Overrides his brain.

[1:13:09] I thought he just lifted him up so that he could, yeah, he just kind of flies them

[1:13:14] around and nobody is like, what is going on?

[1:13:17] They're just like, I didn't know flash could fly.

[1:13:20] Cut to the nub of my very gist, which is my objection to the scene.

[1:13:25] Like, I know this is a silly movie.

[1:13:29] It's ridiculous to get angry over it.

[1:13:31] But like in movies like this, where someone like someone does something totally like

[1:13:35] against the laws of physics, no one's ever like running out in horror.

[1:13:40] No one's screaming.

[1:13:41] No one's like, like questioning their own concepts of reality.

[1:13:47] They're like, Oh, he can fly.

[1:13:48] That's weird.

[1:13:49] Or like the guy from the bad camp is being like, he's flying.

[1:13:53] That's against the rules.

[1:13:54] It's like, what is going on?

[1:13:55] And even crazier than that, do the rules of boxing not even matter?

[1:14:00] They give him a five count and he's still on the ground and they get to just pick him

[1:14:03] up and he's going to box again.

[1:14:05] They're just counting to the end of the round.

[1:14:06] The match was over.

[1:14:07] He didn't get up.

[1:14:08] I thought the bell rang before the count was done.

[1:14:11] I think the, yeah, oh no it did.

[1:14:12] Short defense meatballs.

[1:14:14] I don't know, maybe they contracted for a set number of rounds and so they just needed

[1:14:18] to get up.

[1:14:19] I don't know anything about it.

[1:14:20] So I'm going to trust you.

[1:14:21] But you're right.

[1:14:22] They count to five and then, yeah, then the bell goes, but it's not like, I don't think

[1:14:25] it does cut off the count.

[1:14:26] Anyway, we're going to have to go back to the tape, David.

[1:14:28] So Flash is flying around with very clear wires.

[1:14:31] What you're saying is the flip side of in a horror movie when a monster shows up and

[1:14:34] everyone assumes it's their friend in a costume and they're like, quit it.

[1:14:37] And it's like, that's, this must be take place in an alternate universe where

[1:14:40] Halloween costumes are amazing.

[1:14:41] Yeah.

[1:14:42] Yeah.

[1:14:43] Like sitcoms.

[1:14:43] Yeah.

[1:14:44] Yeah.

[1:14:44] Like Modern Family.

[1:14:45] Yeah.

[1:14:45] I must've shown up to a Roseanne episode, a Halloween episode.

[1:14:49] Where they all have costumes that none of them can afford.

[1:14:52] Yeah.

[1:14:52] You hired Rob Bottin to do your costume.

[1:14:55] That's what I see.

[1:14:55] In Modern Family, they'll be like, we had to throw the haunted house together at the

[1:14:59] last minute.

[1:14:59] Yeah.

[1:14:59] And it's like the most amazing professional, like it's like the Disneyland or something

[1:15:03] like that.

[1:15:04] I had to stop watching that show because the characters were too rich.

[1:15:07] Couldn't believe it anymore.

[1:15:08] Yeah.

[1:15:09] So Flash is flying around on these obvious wires and he starts to kind of win.

[1:15:13] And he's like punching Mad Dog in the head a little bit, you know, cause he's

[1:15:16] flying.

[1:15:17] Cause the most important thing is boxing.

[1:15:19] You can't punch someone in the top of the head.

[1:15:21] That is illegal.

[1:15:22] It is?

[1:15:24] Yeah.

[1:15:24] You're there.

[1:15:25] There are very defined rules where you can hit somebody.

[1:15:27] There's a part where they clinch and people start booing.

[1:15:30] And I was like, this happens in boxing all the time.

[1:15:33] Oh, yeah.

[1:15:34] They put their legs around.

[1:15:35] Oh, was he doing that?

[1:15:36] Oh, that's different.

[1:15:37] That's not okay.

[1:15:38] So.

[1:15:38] I mean, that's fine if they're doing it for fun, but as a boxing, in a boxing match,

[1:15:41] see if there's rules.

[1:15:42] So the evil head of Camp Patton notices that there's an alien in the other stands

[1:15:47] whose eyes are glowing.

[1:15:48] So he realizes that aliens, the reason why this is, they're winning.

[1:15:52] It says almost nothing.

[1:15:54] And he runs aside and he grabs a hand grenade in a room full of children.

[1:16:00] So here's again, well, like you guys are saying, he doesn't see an extraterrestrial

[1:16:03] telekinetic powers.

[1:16:04] My reaction would be, oh my God, I'm witnessing the most important moment in

[1:16:08] scientific history.

[1:16:09] Maybe my little argument over the ownership of this lake is not important.

[1:16:12] Not as if we're knowing, we know we are not alone in the universe.

[1:16:15] We know they have greater power than us and understanding our vulnerability to

[1:16:18] this.

[1:16:19] I feel like the only way I can counteract it is not through violence because I'll

[1:16:23] never defeat them.

[1:16:24] They have control over all matter, but instead through compassion and showing

[1:16:27] them that we're worth saving and worth protecting.

[1:16:29] You know what?

[1:16:30] I, Bat Jack, crazy Hershey, I'm going to turn Camp Patton into a place where people

[1:16:36] learn to love each other because in this universe, all we have is each other against

[1:16:40] these hostile forces or maybe not hostile forces, but the threat of the universe is

[1:16:44] too big for us to be divided.

[1:16:46] And then he's like, I'm going to blow me up an alien.

[1:16:52] He doesn't even go into the, into the, like, I got to capture that alien.

[1:16:55] It's just like, I'm going to kill it.

[1:16:57] I'm going to kill it.

[1:16:58] And I don't care about the collateral damage.

[1:17:02] He sneaks under the bleachers with a grenade.

[1:17:05] Of course he drops the grenade.

[1:17:07] And then the real miracle happens.

[1:17:09] What is that meat, meatball making the grenade chase him around?

[1:17:12] No.

[1:17:14] Little Earl, Tommy McPhee, wheelchair-bound Tommy McPhee can walk.

[1:17:21] What?

[1:17:21] He musters the will to walk just to save the camp.

[1:17:26] Yeah.

[1:17:26] And that's incredible.

[1:17:27] Yeah.

[1:17:28] Nobody knows he did it.

[1:17:29] He doesn't tell anybody.

[1:17:31] No, not everyone.

[1:17:32] While Meathead's getting all the puns.

[1:17:33] He realizes, he realizes that that man has a grenade and he might blow up his

[1:17:38] friend Meatloaf or whatever his name is.

[1:17:40] So he wills himself to walk, hoping that possibly in the ensuing commotion, he

[1:17:46] might blow up himself.

[1:17:48] And of course that takes away Meatball's attention for a second.

[1:17:53] Our cat Meatball?

[1:17:55] That's also true.

[1:17:55] I think that's why he chose this movie, Shirley.

[1:17:57] You're like a movie about my cat.

[1:17:59] So Meatball makes the grenade, uh, with a kind of amazing amount, uh, amazing

[1:18:05] special effect.

[1:18:06] Has this floating glowing grenade chase Hershey out of the, uh, the room.

[1:18:11] I mean, nobody notices.

[1:18:11] Subjective way to describe it.

[1:18:14] Nobody notices a floating grenade or the head of the opposing camp whose very

[1:18:18] property is on the line during all this running out after it going.

[1:18:22] It's one of these very 80s special effects though, where they're like the,

[1:18:25] the grenade is like floating around, chasing him.

[1:18:28] Tracing it in the air for the listeners.

[1:18:31] And it's also like the telecaster drawn on the screen.

[1:18:35] It's all, there's like, there was like animation on the cell.

[1:18:37] Like they've like animated, like going like red and like normal color and red

[1:18:41] and like throbbing red and like flashing red.

[1:18:44] Throbbing is also a word you can use, I guess.

[1:18:47] Never.

[1:18:48] Throbbing grenade.

[1:18:49] Ellie.

[1:18:51] So the, the grenade chased him around a corner and explodes to kill him.

[1:18:55] I can only assume.

[1:18:58] But they're only camp grenades.

[1:18:59] So he survived.

[1:19:01] It's just going to wound him.

[1:19:02] It'll blow up.

[1:19:02] It's full of whipped cream or something.

[1:19:04] Speaking of pinkies, uh, Flash wins the match.

[1:19:07] Uh, he's pronounced the winner and Mad Dog gets up for one last, uh, coup de

[1:19:13] gras.

[1:19:13] He's about to backstab his way to victory, but instead just trips and rips

[1:19:17] the dress off of Flash where the whole room sees his pinky, much to the

[1:19:22] acclaim of the lady campers.

[1:19:24] They can't control themselves.

[1:19:26] And he, he has the dress pulled off himself.

[1:19:29] He sees the reaction.

[1:19:31] Takes a couple beats before he's like, I think I'm naked.

[1:19:34] And then he slowly covers himself.

[1:19:36] But in the press conference afterwards, he was like, I didn't like that.

[1:19:39] I didn't like the way they react.

[1:19:40] I started talking pretty quick and covering myself up pretty quick.

[1:19:43] But if you look at the tape, it was at least 12 seconds.

[1:19:46] Topical.

[1:19:49] Sort of.

[1:19:50] I mean, it won't be topical when this comes out.

[1:19:52] So it looks like everybody's super happy.

[1:19:54] It cuts to the next day.

[1:19:55] Uh, me, uh, now we never find out what happens to Mad Dog.

[1:20:00] we have no idea but we we i'm assuming he is left to rock in a kennel and

[1:20:04] uh... camp and i mean it's badly shaped sasquatch so that's actually probably

[1:20:08] where the name comes out of it

[1:20:10] but uh... so it's you know it's

[1:20:13] and uh... and of camp

[1:20:15] uh... needed is about to go home

[1:20:16] his uh...

[1:20:17] is bunk buddies are all sad about the session for this camp is roughly three

[1:20:21] days yet uh... and of course the as he as he goes home to meet his jewish

[1:20:27] alien father he tells me that i have other campers

[1:20:31] do to buy moves

[1:20:34] something like that rally ideas

[1:20:36] i want to ask

[1:20:37] did did you feel proud was his movie

[1:20:40] saying that like you do you feel like well charlene as well i'm sorry

[1:20:44] judaism you're like

[1:20:45] uh... judaism must be the true religion as a spread through the galaxy i mean

[1:20:49] that's one way to read it uh... the other would be that

[1:20:52] jews can never fully be human

[1:20:54] that alien creatures that were brought here from some other place and no matter

[1:20:59] how much we try to simulate by wearing raincoats and getting excited about how

[1:21:02] this is very excited to eat

[1:21:05] hot gnup gnups

[1:21:07] gnup gnups?

[1:21:10] the game from the seventies? quite possibly

[1:21:13] they may have just used yiddish instead of jewish

[1:21:15] the implication i think the joke is supposed to be that like

[1:21:18] what would be more crazy than if this alien talked like an old jewish man

[1:21:21] but it really does feel like thanks for reinforcing that i guess we are

[1:21:25] deviant sub-humans

[1:21:27] we're literally a different species and we should go back to our home planet

[1:21:31] although this does have one of my favorite lines in the movie which is when he goes

[1:21:34] how was the vacation dad and he goes

[1:21:36] uh... he's like asteroids uh... a lot of space junk it's a real mess up there

[1:21:40] and he's like oh sorry to hear about that dad and it's like

[1:21:44] the way he dismisses space

[1:21:46] as a place to go it's a real mess up there

[1:21:49] it was genuinely the way that one of my parents would describe a trip that they

[1:21:53] take or a restaurant they eat at or anything that happens

[1:21:56] what's tough is that they had to work so hard when they're doing all that ADR work

[1:22:00] to match the slow moving to not moving at all mouth parts of this alien

[1:22:07] i don't understand how this alien flew all this way and ended up in

[1:22:11] the only not jewish camp

[1:22:13] yeah well that's another thing that is that camp sasquatch is so non-denominational

[1:22:16] most camps are jewish like send your kid to the jewish camp

[1:22:20] and there's an offensive joke in there that i'm not going to make

[1:22:23] i'm just going to leave it behind and not touch it

[1:22:25] i was not going for that

[1:22:27] but many summer camps are jewish

[1:22:29] they should have done their research i guess

[1:22:31] my guess is that it was just on the way to wherever they were going

[1:22:35] and of course at this point we realize

[1:22:37] the eighty seven minute adventure is almost up

[1:22:42] just like the summer

[1:22:45] the eighty seven minute adventure

[1:22:47] just like the summer

[1:22:49] the movie is almost over

[1:22:51] school time

[1:22:53] we

[1:22:55] to get one final thread

[1:22:57] tied up

[1:22:59] sheryl drags flash behind a bus

[1:23:01] and gives him a big old

[1:23:03] kiss

[1:23:05] i guess closing that loop forever

[1:23:07] and then the buses

[1:23:09] drive off

[1:23:11] deliberately

[1:23:13] opens up the possibility of more kissing in the future

[1:23:15] i don't know i feel like that's a closure of a loop

[1:23:17] and then it continues on

[1:23:19] in cycles forever

[1:23:21] into madness

[1:23:23] so the buses pull away

[1:23:25] and speaking of madness and cycles that never end

[1:23:27] of course it's a ska revival

[1:23:29] so madness is there

[1:23:31] boomer is wandering after those buses

[1:23:33] with a canoe on his head

[1:23:35] much to giddy's disappointment

[1:23:37] and we the

[1:23:39] to finally close out the loop

[1:23:41] we are gifted with the song

[1:23:43] waiting for the summer

[1:23:45] summer and the sun and fun

[1:23:47] and the women

[1:23:49] so you're saying stewart that much like with the star wars prequels

[1:23:51] what seems like a bad movie

[1:23:53] is in fact a brilliant movie

[1:23:55] because even though it is not entertaining

[1:23:57] it repeats things

[1:23:59] i think you're right elliot

[1:24:01] also the star wars movies have a really strong

[1:24:03] stance against sand

[1:24:05] which i kind of support

[1:24:07] fair fair

[1:24:09] it's everywhere including your butt

[1:24:11] so now is the point on the podcast

[1:24:13] where we tie this part of the show up

[1:24:15] in a little bow

[1:24:17] by making final judgements

[1:24:19] thank you charlene

[1:24:21] if it was a joke i would have laughed

[1:24:23] no i

[1:24:25] if it was a lie

[1:24:27] it would have been mean

[1:24:31] if i could go first for a minute

[1:24:33] because i have to run and do something

[1:24:35] it's a bad bad movie there is almost no movie in it

[1:24:37] ok good

[1:24:39] now that elliot is leaving

[1:24:41] we didn't say we are all actually in the same room

[1:24:43] because of david

[1:24:45] last name withheld

[1:24:47] elliot's brother

[1:24:49] his birthday

[1:24:51] his wedding

[1:24:53] what

[1:25:01] his graduation

[1:25:03] charlene

[1:25:05] it's been a while since you've seen meatballs 2

[1:25:07] it clearly left a mark on you

[1:25:09] that's why you picked it

[1:25:11] what do you think

[1:25:13] well i

[1:25:15] actually was

[1:25:17] pleasantly surprised

[1:25:19] that

[1:25:21] i was a little worried picking

[1:25:23] a summer camp movie from the 80s

[1:25:25] and while there definitely

[1:25:27] were some offensive things

[1:25:29] it was not nearly as offensive

[1:25:31] as i thought it could have been

[1:25:33] there was

[1:25:35] no rape

[1:25:37] in it at all

[1:25:39] that's true

[1:25:41] the highest recommendation

[1:25:43] and even the homophobic stuff

[1:25:45] was much lighter

[1:25:47] and it almost seemed like

[1:25:49] it was isolated to the villains

[1:25:51] and then when

[1:25:53] flash came out in the dress

[1:25:55] and it was just like whatever

[1:25:57] no one even really made fun of him

[1:25:59] it was just fine

[1:26:01] a dress that once again can i state

[1:26:03] in no way would fit john larrakat

[1:26:05] no

[1:26:07] i think it was really stupid

[1:26:09] and fun to watch

[1:26:11] i think it was a good bad movie

[1:26:13] i'm going to back you up on this

[1:26:15] i think it was a good bad movie

[1:26:17] because it is incredibly dumb

[1:26:19] and it is in that sweet spot of only

[1:26:21] 87 minutes long

[1:26:23] under 90 minutes

[1:26:25] and there's some dumb stuff

[1:26:27] there's a couple of jokes that i'm not into

[1:26:29] but you know

[1:26:31] considering the time it's not as bad as it could have been

[1:26:33] i'm going to go mild good bad

[1:26:35] the thing is for me

[1:26:37] for the age i am

[1:26:39] to watch

[1:26:41] a really really dumb

[1:26:43] 80s comedy that feels like

[1:26:45] again it could have been on USA up all night

[1:26:47] even though it wasn't a sex comedy

[1:26:49] to watch that kind of movie is like

[1:26:51] i don't know like

[1:26:53] lying in a hammock

[1:26:55] and having a coconut drink

[1:26:57] it's so comfortable

[1:26:59] it's such a pleasant

[1:27:01] feeling because of all the waves of

[1:27:03] nostalgia it brings on me even though it's

[1:27:05] such a fucking terrible thing

[1:27:07] that i kind of enjoyed it

[1:27:09] even though it was not good

[1:27:11] i don't think you have to defend yourself dan

[1:27:13] i do

[1:27:15] all the time

[1:27:17] i mean i think we all like our dumb guilty pleasures

[1:27:19] and 80s teenage comedies

[1:27:21] just happen to be yours

[1:27:23] you feel a little guilty

[1:27:25] no there's terrible stuff in some of them

[1:27:27] i recognize that

[1:27:29] there's stuff that i cannot watch

[1:27:31] like aliens

[1:27:33] and predators

[1:27:37] hi i'm joe firestone

[1:27:39] and i'm manolo moreno

[1:27:41] and we're the hosts of doctor game show

[1:27:43] which is a podcast where we play games submitted by listeners

[1:27:45] regardless of quality or content

[1:27:47] with in studio guests

[1:27:49] and callers from all over the world

[1:27:51] a custom magnet

[1:27:53] subscribe now to make sure you get our next episode

[1:27:55] what's an example of a game manolo

[1:27:57] pokemon or medication

[1:27:59] how do you play that

[1:28:01] you have to guess if something's a pokemon name or a medication

[1:28:03] first time listener

[1:28:05] if you want to listen to episode highlights

[1:28:07] and also know how to participate

[1:28:09] follow doctor game show on facebook

[1:28:11] instagram and twitter

[1:28:13] we'd love to hear from you

[1:28:15] for the whole family

[1:28:17] we'll be every other wednesday starting march 13th

[1:28:20] thanks for coming

[1:28:22] these are real podcast listeners

[1:28:24] not actors

[1:28:26] we took the identifying marks off this podcast

[1:28:28] just tell me your impressions

[1:28:30] it's really sexy

[1:28:32] my first thought is like radio lab

[1:28:34] definitely something popular

[1:28:36] yeah really popular

[1:28:38] a hit show

[1:28:40] but funny too

[1:28:42] like does tina fey have a podcast

[1:28:44] or the marks brothers

[1:28:46] yeah is this podcast radio lab

[1:28:48] but hosted by the marks brothers

[1:28:50] and sexy

[1:28:52] like sade

[1:28:54] it reminds me of sade

[1:28:56] exactly

[1:28:58] and they're all riding in a bmw

[1:29:00] close but not quite

[1:29:02] take a look behind these panels

[1:29:04] and then watch this rocket

[1:29:06] blast off into space

[1:29:08] and

[1:29:10] there's the pies we made you

[1:29:12] now

[1:29:14] let's show you the podcast

[1:29:16] oh

[1:29:18] wow it was jordan jesse go

[1:29:20] jordan jesse go

[1:29:22] hold on

[1:29:24] oh

[1:29:26] my goodness

[1:29:28] that was 514 jd power and associates

[1:29:30] podcasting awards

[1:29:32] that was really scary

[1:29:34] but compelling

[1:29:36] i guess i should definitely subscribe to jordan jesse go

[1:29:38] um yeah

[1:29:40] i'd say so

[1:29:42] jordan jesse go

[1:29:44] a real podcast

[1:30:00] Till Death Do Us Party, well he's got a new album out and it is back-to-back

[1:30:05] bangers such as It's Gonna Stink, I'm a Rock, Illegal, Glossy, My Skin Fell Off and

[1:30:29] Howl Dottie featuring Tony Robots, Trash.

[1:30:36] You can listen to this at Spotify, Bandcamp or wherever you listen to music, I don't know,

[1:30:40] check it out guys.

[1:30:52] Okay, so let's move on to ads, okay, keep the lights on, yeah, well the good thing about

[1:31:00] ads is they help pay our bills, yep, Stuart, despite us having no skills, yeah, the first

[1:31:07] sponsor tonight is Squarespace, the Flop House is sponsored in part by Squarespace, it's

[1:31:13] a service that helps you create a website to turn your cool idea into, you know, an

[1:31:19] online portal of some kind, you know, I said online portal, Al is laughing at me, it's

[1:31:26] because, I just, it was the of some kind, the copy says create a beautiful website to

[1:31:30] turn your cool idea into a new website, which seems redundant, so I was trying on the fly

[1:31:35] to use my mind thesaurus to change, the rarest of the dinosaurs, the mind thesaurus, but

[1:31:43] a terrible joke, you can also use Squarespace to blog or publish content, sell products

[1:31:48] and services of any kinds and do anything else your little heart desires on the internet,

[1:31:54] it's got beautiful customizable templates created by world-class designers, everything

[1:31:58] optimized for mobile right out of the box, a new way to buy domains and choose from over

[1:32:03] 200 extensions, free and secure hosting, hey guys, head to squarespace.com slash flop for

[1:32:12] free trial and when you're ready to launch, use the offer code flop to save 10% off your

[1:32:18] first purchase of a website or domain.

[1:32:21] Now Dan, I was wondering if Squarespace would be able to help me with an online product,

[1:32:26] let's call it.

[1:32:27] Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1:32:28] Most likely.

[1:32:29] Does it further establish your brand?

[1:32:32] Not exactly, unless my brand is giving people what they want, which in this case is pinkies.

[1:32:36] Now until I watched Meatballs Part 2, I always thought of the pinky as just the least of

[1:32:40] the fingers, the one that if I had to lose a finger, of course I'm going to choose the

[1:32:43] little guy, cute as he is, but this movie, they're just constantly talking about pinkies

[1:32:47] and I'm like, I'm giving people what they want.

[1:32:49] So on pinkielook.com, it's your place for looking at pinkies, learning about pinkies,

[1:32:54] you know, just find out what that little guy is doing on the end of your hand.

[1:32:57] Once again, we're not talking about baby mice.

[1:32:59] No, not baby mice, we're talking about the pinky finger.

[1:33:03] Now let's talk about fingers.

[1:33:05] You got your thumb, he's the workhorse of the group.

[1:33:07] He's doing the most stuff and he gets the least credit or the most sometimes.

[1:33:10] You got your pointer finger, he's good in the clutch.

[1:33:12] You want to identify something, he's the guy to go to.

[1:33:14] Middle finger, a bit of a bad boy.

[1:33:18] You know, he's rude and he's got toot.

[1:33:20] Ring finger, he's got one job, he does it mostly well.

[1:33:22] And then the pinky, who's kind of like the little kid.

[1:33:25] And so, I didn't think people wanted to see him, again, least of the fingers.

[1:33:27] Yeah, he's the like, what is that, Albert, Alfred, what's the little kid from the sitcom?

[1:33:31] Oliver?

[1:33:32] Hardy, Oliver?

[1:33:33] Wait, which sitcom?

[1:33:34] I mean, which sitcom?

[1:33:35] I don't know.

[1:33:36] It's...

[1:33:37] Uh, one of them.

[1:33:38] Little kid.

[1:33:39] Oh, the new kid from the Brady Bunch?

[1:33:40] Yeah.

[1:33:41] Oliver.

[1:33:42] Yeah.

[1:33:44] You know, all of those names have been on a child at some point.

[1:33:46] So, Pinkylook.com, for any Meatballs for Part 2 fans who are interested in looking at pinkies,

[1:33:51] Pinkylook.com.

[1:33:52] And now on Squarespace.

[1:33:53] According to Dan.

[1:33:55] Yes, and the Flophouse is also sponsored in part by Z-Man Games.

[1:34:01] Oh, yeah!

[1:34:03] The makers of Pandemic Rapid Response, it's not Rampant Response, Rapid Response.

[1:34:07] That's a different game.

[1:34:08] Stuart, you play that?

[1:34:09] I do play that, yeah.

[1:34:10] Uh, look, disasters strike, and cities around the world are in desperate need of food, water,

[1:34:17] vaccines, and other supplies.

[1:34:20] With a specially equipped cargo plane, you and your team are uniquely capable of providing

[1:34:25] life-saving aid anytime, anywhere.

[1:34:27] Dan, can I pretend it's the cargo plane from Tailspin?

[1:34:30] You can.

[1:34:31] That was a pretty unique cargo plane, right?

[1:34:34] It was.

[1:34:35] In that it was piloted by a bear?

[1:34:37] Now, how did he use a little fan to skateboard on the air?

[1:34:42] How did that happen?

[1:34:43] Well, it was one of those shows that takes place in the future and also the 40s, so,

[1:34:47] and they're all animals who talk, so I don't know, man.

[1:34:49] A tiger is a rich businessman, and a lion is a kind of absent-minded mechanic.

[1:34:53] So I think that you're asking one of many questions that I can't answer.

[1:34:57] Future in the 40s feels like another George Lucas autobiography title.

[1:35:03] But to continue, pandemic rapid response is a race against time.

[1:35:07] Roll dice to create supplies, fly the plane, and make deliveries to cities in need.

[1:35:12] As the timer counts down, you must quickly coordinate and work together to react to new

[1:35:17] disasters.

[1:35:19] Can you save humanity in time?

[1:35:22] Includes seven unique character rolls and 24 custom dice.

[1:35:28] Increase the difficulty with more city cards and add crisis cards for a new challenge.

[1:35:34] Find out more from, sorry, find out more about pandemic rapid response at ZmanGames.com and

[1:35:42] grab your copy of the game from a target near you.

[1:35:45] Stuart was shaking his head so dramatically as I bungled that last part.

[1:35:49] I feel like Dan did such a good job selling it, I can tell that Charlene is just aching

[1:35:53] to play board games with me now.

[1:35:55] What is the general area that the box takes up?

[1:36:00] Yeah, Dan, does the copy explain how much shelf space pandemic rapid response takes

[1:36:06] up?

[1:36:07] It's a pretty small box, to be honest.

[1:36:08] It's not that big of a box.

[1:36:09] It's got a lean profile.

[1:36:10] Yeah.

[1:36:11] Okay.

[1:36:12] Except that it packs a big punch in terms of fun and excitement.

[1:36:16] Yeah, it's good.

[1:36:17] It's fun.

[1:36:18] I've talked about it before, but it's for a cooperative game, I think it adds a couple

[1:36:23] of new twists, and it's great for kind of players of all different skill levels.

[1:36:28] It's really cool.

[1:36:29] And it's not a game that drags on.

[1:36:30] No.

[1:36:31] It's a timed game.

[1:36:32] It's a nice slim game.

[1:36:33] Oh.

[1:36:34] Both in size and length of time it occupies in your life.

[1:36:37] Time of game.

[1:36:38] Oh, Stuart, what's that?

[1:36:39] I think it was Jumbotron.

[1:36:40] Oh, yeah.

[1:36:41] Do you remember that?

[1:36:42] Oh, yeah.

[1:36:43] Let's talk amongst ourselves while Stuart looks up that Jumbotron.

[1:36:44] So what did you guys talk about while I was certainly not in the bathroom?

[1:36:45] I think it was mostly about how we all agreed it was a good, bad movie in defiance of your

[1:36:58] will.

[1:37:01] Maybe it is a good movie.

[1:37:02] No.

[1:37:03] I apologize.

[1:37:04] I was having trouble thinking because I needed to go do something that certainly did not

[1:37:06] involve the bathroom.

[1:37:07] J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-Jumbotron.

[1:37:08] But maybe it is a good...

[1:37:09] But the thing is the thing about Meebles Part 2 that makes it maybe a little bit bad is

[1:37:16] it made me this...

[1:37:17] What you can't see is I literally put a stick in the turbine that starts up the Jumbotron.

[1:37:22] So it's trying to start up again.

[1:37:26] It made me nostalgic for the days when a movie didn't really have to have any content.

[1:37:31] I watched the movie and I was like, that was in theaters?

[1:37:34] It was barely a thing.

[1:37:36] So let's start up that Jumbotron.

[1:37:38] Check out the hilarious You Don't Know Jackie show wherever podcasts are heard.

[1:37:43] That is the call to action.

[1:37:45] I'll say it again in a moment.

[1:37:46] First order of business.

[1:37:47] Shout outs to the very best bad movie podcast, The Flop House.

[1:37:52] Wow.

[1:37:53] Sincerely.

[1:37:54] It's weird that I'm saying that about my own podcast, but that's cool.

[1:37:58] Sincerely.

[1:37:59] Not trying to kiss ass.

[1:38:00] We really do appreciate the hundreds of entertaining hours you've provided over the years.

[1:38:05] Second order of business.

[1:38:06] Shameless promotion of our podcast, You Don't Know Jackie.

[1:38:12] We're three friends, all named Jackie, who like crime, take no prisoners, and always

[1:38:18] please that booty.

[1:38:20] We do none of those things, but you can catch us chewing the fat every Wednesday on your

[1:38:25] podcast app.

[1:38:26] So once again, call to action is check out the hilarious You Don't Know Jackie show

[1:38:33] wherever podcasts are heard.

[1:38:35] And based on the description of the show, I don't know Jackie.

[1:38:40] You may never know Jackie.

[1:38:41] But I'd like to know.

[1:38:42] I like that attitude.

[1:38:43] And I, of course, like nice words about our podcast here at The Flop House.

[1:38:46] They know how to butter us up.

[1:38:48] Dan and Elliot are playing some kind of mobile game right now on their phones.

[1:38:52] Yeah.

[1:38:53] We're texting each other.

[1:38:54] Yeah.

[1:38:55] Boy, didn't Stuart do a great job reading that?

[1:38:56] Oh, wow.

[1:38:57] It's so nice of you guys.

[1:38:58] What do we do now in this podcast?

[1:39:01] Well, next we go to letters.

[1:39:04] Sorry.

[1:39:05] We were confused about what we were each doing.

[1:39:09] No, I just want to double check that I didn't have a Jumbotron to read.

[1:39:11] Oh, no, you didn't.

[1:39:12] But why would I?

[1:39:13] Why would I ever get to read a Jumbotron?

[1:39:14] No, there was only one, and I made a call.

[1:39:16] And Stuart's...

[1:39:17] No, you made the right call.

[1:39:18] Stuart's everybody's favorite.

[1:39:19] He's the party animal.

[1:39:20] And Dan knew that I was going to kill it in the summary portion of this podcast.

[1:39:23] Yeah, that's true.

[1:39:24] And he's like, let's just keep feeding that beast.

[1:39:26] Let's keep the stew times rolling.

[1:39:28] Yeah.

[1:39:29] We should plug our shows, I suppose.

[1:39:32] That was a nice little rhyme there.

[1:39:35] Shows, I suppose.

[1:39:37] I was confused because I thought maybe that's where you were.

[1:39:38] Oh, no.

[1:39:39] On the Flophouse website looking up the old shows.

[1:39:41] Well, I'll tell you about those shows.

[1:39:43] We got live shows coming up in two different cities.

[1:39:47] You heard me.

[1:39:48] Two different cities.

[1:39:49] The first one, it's Boston.

[1:39:51] Well, technically it's not Boston.

[1:39:53] I think it's technically Brookline.

[1:39:54] But it's close enough to Boston that we are calling it Boston.

[1:39:57] And so we are going to be at...

[1:40:00] WB you are city space on was it September 28th September 28th. I am also on the website right Saturday

[1:40:06] We have two shows the 7 p.m. Show is still sold out the 945 show though still has some tickets so

[1:40:15] Come see us late night now even if you're seeing the 7 p.m.

[1:40:18] Show we will be doing two different shows talking about two different movies

[1:40:21] So if you do different presentations if you think you can stand

[1:40:25] four hours of this

[1:40:27] Then just buying you were a fool sir or madam

[1:40:32] I think or non-binary person then buy tickets to both those shows again. That's September 28th in Boston, Massachusetts area

[1:40:39] It's a Saturday 7 p.m.. And 945 p.m.. At WB you are city space and then in October

[1:40:45] Shocktober some might call it we're gonna be in Los Angeles. That's right my hometown October 12th

[1:40:50] We're gonna be at the Regent Theatre. We're returning, but this time. We're bringing something special

[1:40:54] Stewart because hopefully

[1:40:58] Hopefully his back will not keep him from traveling cross-country again. He's been doing all of his back exercises

[1:41:04] So just to remind you those on the East Coast or as I call it now the least coast

[1:41:09] Especially you mass holes out there go on September 28th to see us in Boston

[1:41:13] seven o'clock show and

[1:41:15] 945 show again seven o'clock show sold out and then in October 12th will be on the West Coast or as I now call it the

[1:41:20] West Coast at the Regent Theatre, that's October 12th in LA September 28th in Boston come see us live

[1:41:26] We're gonna be talking movies and doing presentations, and then maybe just maybe making some dreams come true

[1:41:32] Probably not that last well. Maybe if your dream is to see us watch movies

[1:41:37] Yeah

[1:41:38] So does the the prospect of us doing a bunch more out of town shows fill you with stress and dread having to hurt us?

[1:41:44] and corral us and to

[1:41:45] Make our actual showtimes. I've already booked all of the lodging so that's off my plate

[1:41:53] and

[1:41:54] Yeah, I'm wondering how late how late the Boston show is gonna

[1:41:59] Go and how tired we're gonna be at the end of that pretty late and pretty tired

[1:42:04] And will I fall asleep probably?

[1:42:06] We probably are not hanging out with people in Boston like we usually do we will probably go right back to the hotel

[1:42:12] During the Minneapolis show where afterwards Charlene was like Stewart. I didn't fall asleep at all during

[1:42:22] Yes, I was sitting next to somebody at a show not too long ago that was like

[1:42:27] Something wrong with her because I kept nodding off

[1:42:31] She was wondering if she was supposed to catch me

[1:42:34] And you're like no no

[1:42:40] Well, she's used to hearing my voice speak

[1:42:43] When I read the song of ice and fire novels out loud to her in bed, and it puts her to sleep

[1:42:49] Even though I'm doing cool character voices, which is fucking crazy, man. I want to hear some of those Sandor sound like he sounds like

[1:43:03] What about like what about Bran what about Bran

[1:43:10] Okay, what about like Daenerys

[1:43:15] What about like Varys

[1:43:21] What about like there's other characters in that

[1:43:33] Oh

[1:44:00] Right this one this first letter

[1:44:03] From listeners, this is a thing we do we we have to let some

[1:44:08] The most explanatory

[1:44:12] If I knew a listener came along

[1:44:14] They'd be like letters from listeners. What could that be? Is it like listeners to something? I don't know what he hasn't explained

[1:44:20] They send them what giant letters. I don't know why I'm assuming that they send them to him

[1:44:24] Maybe Dan's just guessing what letters have come out of losers

[1:44:27] I'm some kind of a person who has decided for some reason to listen to two hours of

[1:44:32] About meatballs part two

[1:44:35] All right

[1:44:37] Our new listeners

[1:44:41] Who has decided that they need a new meatball recipe and is waiting for us to get to it. Yeah, here's what you do

[1:44:46] It's Brian Doyle Murray hoping to hear about his brother

[1:44:49] You make turkey meatballs and you put spinach in it. All right kids love it

[1:44:56] No, it tastes delicious

[1:45:01] I hope the audience at home

[1:45:07] Maybe my father will listen to this episode

[1:45:11] That's like at my brother's wedding

[1:45:13] My sister and I made reference to something that a tour guide in Hawaii once told us when we were a kid

[1:45:18] When David turned do something was supposed to do and I looked at my wife like isn't that hilarious?

[1:45:22] It was like wait, I think you've never heard this story. I was forgetting who knows things and he doesn't I've been there

[1:45:28] This first letter is from Nick last name withheld

[1:45:32] Who writes we seem to be in a mini renaissance of monster romance movies?

[1:45:38] the shape of water one best picture and venom has found an audience interpreting the

[1:45:43] Relationship between Eddie Brock and the titular space monster as a romantic one. This is a very mini renaissance

[1:45:49] vampires and werewolves have been seen as sexy for decades and

[1:45:53] Now Gilman and alien parasites have a seat at the table, but what's your dream monster romance product project?

[1:46:01] Sorry, not product

[1:46:03] No, no, it's a blow-up Godzilla. I can have sex with

[1:46:19] Dream monster romance

[1:46:21] project

[1:46:22] What monster or monsters would play the leading role would it be a straight romance a gay or lesbian one and is the world?

[1:46:29] Finally ready for your Babadook and Pennywise on Fire Island pitch. Keep up the good work Nick last name withheld

[1:46:38] Yeah, we probably got a slap a couple of fat TMS on this next segment

[1:46:50] Because we're talking about copyright cater characters if we slap teams on it, that means they're ours

[1:46:59] Get my attorney in the line

[1:47:02] Yeah, we got one of those like stretching to mail it to ourselves stick a man's we got out of a gachapon machine that we

[1:47:08] like the TM on it, okay, so

[1:47:11] speaking of gachapon machines, I

[1:47:14] Think my fantasy monster romance

[1:47:18] said in the ye olde and fantasy times and it is a romance between

[1:47:24] Sue an animated suit of armor that maybe has you know, like somebody's spirit

[1:47:31] Stuck to it

[1:47:33] It's been animated by an evil wizard. He's trying to protect. I don't know a tower

[1:47:37] I don't know maybe is a fortune or something and that and that suit of living armor

[1:47:44] Starts a loving relationship with kind of an ooze or a jelly or a gelatinous cube

[1:47:51] But normally just devours the bodies of adventurers who sneak into this tower and are killed by the living armor

[1:47:57] but then like they realize that the two of them, you know, they kind of feel a need in the other like the

[1:48:04] The the suit of armor can't feel anything at all

[1:48:07] it's just iron and steel whereas the the giant cube is basically just like nothing but

[1:48:14] sensation and like maybe the maybe the the blob like

[1:48:19] Slips through the cracks of the armor and like the whole like fills up the armor in a way like

[1:48:25] At the same time feels protected by the armor as for your question about is it a straight or gay?

[1:48:31] I think that's unrelated and unnecessary because it can kind of be almost I don't know why you would limit yourself to gendering

[1:48:38] You sure it was so close to Calvino's the non-existent night until that gelatinous cube came in

[1:48:46] Say

[1:48:49] I mean one thing I'll say is the Gilman has always been sexy. So let's just put a pin in that. Okay

[1:48:56] Make it sexy. I mean you sound that kind of like

[1:48:59] That like constantly frowning my mouth kind of like the George Gremlin from Gremlins 2. Yeah, just

[1:49:07] Yeah

[1:49:11] Yeah, but he it was like very pouty that was like a pouty Gilman mouth, you know, yeah

[1:49:17] I don't know. I'm wondering, you know, I've always wondered about the relationship between Gamera and all those little Japanese kids Wow

[1:49:26] One of those kids grows up because of I guess legal age in this case to

[1:49:31] Romance a monster

[1:49:34] Okay, well, I literally wrote a short story once I've not found it wasn't very good

[1:49:38] I haven't found the right thing but where that's a date between

[1:49:41] basically a woman who just

[1:49:43] Experienced King Kong and a big grown-up kid from Gamera and just that they are these two characters who?

[1:49:50] They're the only ones who can really relate to each other's experiences

[1:49:53] there's the only people who've had these experiences with monsters that were both terrifying but also very strangely intimate and

[1:50:00] I could never really pull it off.

[1:50:01] James, I'm also, in a way, like defenders of children.

[1:50:04] I mean, Gamera's very much a defender of children.

[1:50:06] King Kong is just out for what King Kong wants, you know?

[1:50:09] To get as tall as possible.

[1:50:11] Yeah, to get as high as possible,

[1:50:13] which he just needs to take some marijuana, I guess,

[1:50:15] and make it, make him float if he's an alien.

[1:50:19] Well, why couldn't King Kong be an alien, huh?

[1:50:21] Hollywood, give me the job for your movie,

[1:50:23] King Kong in Space.

[1:50:25] Uh, I'm just gonna pick two monsters I like.

[1:50:30] I'm gonna say the Spider Gremlin and the Tar Man zombie

[1:50:34] from Return of the Living Dead go out on a date.

[1:50:38] You know, they find each other on Hinge.

[1:50:41] Sure, yeah.

[1:50:41] They go out.

[1:50:42] Yeah, they got friends.

[1:50:43] They got friends in common.

[1:50:44] They got mutuals.

[1:50:45] I hear that there's a good place

[1:50:46] that does like a lobster roll near us.

[1:50:49] Yeah.

[1:50:49] We'll check it out.

[1:50:50] Tar Man and Robert Picardo went to college together.

[1:50:55] So they're Facebook friends.

[1:50:55] So they met at the wedding

[1:50:57] between Robert Picardo and the Lady Gremlin, yeah.

[1:51:00] And they, you know, they,

[1:51:01] eventually they, you know, marry, get together,

[1:51:04] have really-

[1:51:05] Did they marry before they get together?

[1:51:07] They have really gooey little Spider Gremlins.

[1:51:11] Oh, yeah, like a kind of a sad,

[1:51:12] like Revolutionary Road type thing.

[1:51:15] Oh, really?

[1:51:17] So which one is DiCaprio

[1:51:19] and which one is Winslet in that scenario?

[1:51:20] I'll let you figure that one out.

[1:51:22] Charlene, I'm sure you have lots of thoughts on this.

[1:51:25] Well, so Dan sent me a part of this question ahead of time.

[1:51:30] Dan is not very good at giving us the context for questions.

[1:51:33] So I wouldn't be caught off guard.

[1:51:36] And I'm not that familiar with monsters.

[1:51:40] So I thought you just wanted us to ship two monsters.

[1:51:42] Yeah, that's basically what we're doing.

[1:51:45] Okay, so I don't know that many.

[1:51:49] And I had already picked the Lady Gremlin

[1:51:51] and you just mentioned her, so that's okay.

[1:51:54] But I was gonna ship her with, you know,

[1:51:56] the guy from the Muppet movies that like,

[1:51:59] they always leave without?

[1:52:01] They always leave, is that Sweetums?

[1:52:02] The one who's like, oh yeah, I'll go get my bag.

[1:52:04] And he comes out and he's like, guys, yeah,

[1:52:06] him and the Lady Gremlin.

[1:52:07] So the Muppets leave and Sweetums is standing there

[1:52:10] and as the Muppets bus pulls away, like what?

[1:52:13] Like, don't you forget about me?

[1:52:14] No, they don't, they don't have the bus at that point.

[1:52:17] Why they're there is because they're getting a car.

[1:52:19] Yeah, a car, that's where they buy the-

[1:52:21] No, a hot pink Angeline-style convertible drives up

[1:52:26] and the Lady Gremlin looks out at Sweetums

[1:52:29] and lowers her shades and goes, mm.

[1:52:33] And, you know, romance begins.

[1:52:35] And he jumps over the Lady Gremlin.

[1:52:37] Did I mention, Lady Gremlin and Bride of Frankenstein

[1:52:40] are also Thelma and Louising at that moment.

[1:52:42] Oh, cool.

[1:52:43] So that's-

[1:52:44] Wait, does that make Sweetums the Brad Pitt?

[1:52:47] Sweetums is very much the Brad Pitt.

[1:52:48] Oh no, he's a bad guy.

[1:52:51] That all works out for him, right?

[1:52:52] You know, he's a rogue.

[1:52:53] It works out for everyone.

[1:52:55] It works out for everybody, yeah.

[1:52:56] Happy endings all around.

[1:52:59] That's like a Sarlacc Pitt-type ending, right?

[1:53:03] I mean, in that, if someone falls into something?

[1:53:05] Yeah, but then they get, they blast their way out

[1:53:08] in the extended universe stuff, right?

[1:53:10] Yeah, sure, yeah.

[1:53:11] Thelma and Louising blast their way out of the Grand Canyon.

[1:53:13] I also like the idea that that's like a Hollywood phrase

[1:53:16] that people say.

[1:53:18] And then, you know, it's got a Sarlacc Pitt ending.

[1:53:20] It's like Jump the Shark is a Sarlacc ending.

[1:53:22] Yeah.

[1:53:23] So we get our characters to where they go.

[1:53:25] Sarlacc Pitt, Sarlacc Pitt, Sarlacc Pitt.

[1:53:27] End of the day, everybody's happy.

[1:53:28] Okay, so now we end TM.

[1:53:30] Okay, so just ending that ellipsis.

[1:53:33] This-

[1:53:34] Oh, well, I just, I had one more.

[1:53:35] I actually had one more thing,

[1:53:36] and we can reopen the TMs.

[1:53:38] The alien and the predator both have weird mouths,

[1:53:40] but they seem like they'd be able to kiss each other, so.

[1:53:43] Why are you always versusing?

[1:53:45] Why are we always pitting aliens and predators

[1:53:46] against each other when they're a true match?

[1:53:48] I've mentioned this before on the podcast, I'm sure,

[1:53:50] but there's a moment where,

[1:53:51] in the first Alien vs. Predator movie,

[1:53:53] where it seems like, destined, like our female lead

[1:53:57] and the predator are going to kiss, and they don't.

[1:54:00] And if they had, I would have loved that movie forever,

[1:54:02] but they didn't, and I hate that movie forever.

[1:54:05] And maybe, you know what,

[1:54:06] the lady centibite from Hellraiser?

[1:54:08] Which is, that's her technical name,

[1:54:10] according to the internet.

[1:54:11] Female centibite.

[1:54:12] I just matched her up with Bill Pullman

[1:54:14] from Mr. Wrong, starring Ellen DeGeneres.

[1:54:16] Is he a monster?

[1:54:18] He is a stalker, he is a monster, he's a crazy person.

[1:54:21] It's not a funny movie,

[1:54:22] because it's genuinely kind of frightening.

[1:54:25] And also, the jokes are not good.

[1:54:26] But, you know, why not match them up?

[1:54:28] So, MTM, TMTM.

[1:54:31] Mary Tyler Moore Productions.

[1:54:34] So, this next letter is from Ryan, last name withheld,

[1:54:37] who writes, I was in a gift shop in Park City,

[1:54:42] during a trip with some friends,

[1:54:44] when I spotted a gift mug that was inscribed with a quote,

[1:54:47] eat, drink, and be merry,

[1:54:49] for tomorrow you may be in Utah.

[1:54:51] I turned to my friend and said,

[1:54:52] hey, look at this cool reference

[1:54:54] to that awesome Dave Matthews band song.

[1:54:57] My friend informed me that the original quote

[1:54:59] was from the Bible.

[1:55:00] In a similar vein.

[1:55:02] I mean, DMV is kind of the Bible

[1:55:04] for a lot of bros out there.

[1:55:06] In a similar vein.

[1:55:07] The lacrosse community.

[1:55:08] I recently watched the 1942 film, To Be or Not To Be,

[1:55:11] and realized it was a clear source of inspiration

[1:55:14] for some of Tarantino's Inglourious Bastards.

[1:55:17] Can you recall any moments when you discovered

[1:55:20] that an idea or piece of culture from a movie

[1:55:23] that you thought was entirely original

[1:55:25] actually had its roots in an earlier movie or work of art?

[1:55:29] Keep on flopping in the free world,

[1:55:30] Ryan, last name withheld.

[1:55:34] You know, this doesn't exactly answer the question,

[1:55:38] but the thing that I've seen a lot

[1:55:41] is when either me or a friend

[1:55:44] has really loved a cover song,

[1:55:47] thinking it was the original,

[1:55:48] and then being sad when they found it.

[1:55:50] Like, my favorite Judas Priest song for the longest time

[1:55:54] was Diamonds and Rust,

[1:55:56] which is not a Judas Priest original,

[1:55:59] but it's great and it totally fits that band.

[1:56:01] And also, I had a friend who was talking nonstop

[1:56:07] about his favorite song off of the Crows soundtrack,

[1:56:11] the Nine Inch Nails cover of the song Dead Souls,

[1:56:13] and when I told him it was originally a Joy Division song,

[1:56:15] he was, like, visibly depressed.

[1:56:18] I don't look at me next, because I'm still thinking.

[1:56:24] Even though I had this letter

[1:56:26] longer than any of the rest of you.

[1:56:29] Didn't have a wedding to best man at.

[1:56:31] No, not at all.

[1:56:32] I have no excuse.

[1:56:34] Are you, and it's the weekend, yes?

[1:56:37] I mean, I was pretty busy yesterday, but yes.

[1:56:44] Pretty busy.

[1:56:45] Glad you threw the qualifier on there.

[1:56:47] Well, that leads me to my movie, Pretty Woman,

[1:56:51] because when I first saw it,

[1:56:54] I had no idea that it was based off of Pygmalion.

[1:57:01] I think you're right.

[1:57:01] And My Fair Lady, which we just recently saw,

[1:57:07] although the ending was different.

[1:57:08] Oh, did you see the Broadway version of it?

[1:57:10] We did.

[1:57:10] Yeah, with that Laura Benanti, oh man.

[1:57:13] It was really good.

[1:57:15] People are going bananas for Benanti.

[1:57:16] The Lincoln Center production?

[1:57:17] Yeah, it was great.

[1:57:18] Oh, that's so, so good, so good.

[1:57:20] They do a great job putting a classic musical together.

[1:57:22] And the original Aunt May from the Sam Raimi movies.

[1:57:25] Oh, she's so funny.

[1:57:26] She's so great.

[1:57:29] Well, I didn't see it, so.

[1:57:31] Oh, I'm sorry, you can't brag

[1:57:33] about seeing a theater performance for once.

[1:57:36] Once she came out, I was like, surely, no tip.

[1:57:40] And I was like, what?

[1:57:43] You see Henry Higgins with great power,

[1:57:45] comes with responsibility.

[1:57:46] Linguistic power, linguistic responsibility.

[1:57:51] I'm sure there's none that come to mind,

[1:57:53] but there are many times, it's similarly like when you see,

[1:57:57] for the longest time, things that I thought were just jokes,

[1:58:00] like, we don't need no stinking badges, I would see things.

[1:58:03] And it wasn't until years later

[1:58:04] that I saw Treasure of the Sierra Madre,

[1:58:06] I'm like, oh, this is a reference to a movie

[1:58:08] that I don't know anyone talks about when I was a kid.

[1:58:12] But I didn't expect me to know that joke.

[1:58:14] That happens all the time.

[1:58:15] Like Bugs Bunny?

[1:58:16] Yeah.

[1:58:18] I saw Spaceballs long before I ever saw

[1:58:21] the chestburster scene from Alien.

[1:58:23] Yeah, yeah.

[1:58:25] Oh, sorry.

[1:58:26] No, I was gonna say, I think that that's honestly

[1:58:28] kind of the best I can come up with, too,

[1:58:30] is that, I can't think of a specific,

[1:58:32] but growing up, I think, is a long process

[1:58:35] in some ways of realizing, like,

[1:58:36] oh, that joke was a reference.

[1:58:39] It wasn't just funny itself.

[1:58:41] It was like, there's a thread

[1:58:43] on the Flophouse Facebook group right now

[1:58:45] that's all about stuff in The Simpsons

[1:58:47] that you realize meant something different

[1:58:49] once you were an adult.

[1:58:51] And I think a large part of watching The Simpsons

[1:58:55] was that for me.

[1:58:56] I watched the Bobo episode of The Simpsons,

[1:58:59] for instance, when I was a kid,

[1:59:00] I knew, like, oh, okay, Rosebuds,

[1:59:02] it's a Susan Cain reference,

[1:59:03] because that's a famous reference,

[1:59:04] but then you, like, watch Susan Cain,

[1:59:06] you go back, and you're like,

[1:59:07] oh, like, a ton of this is from Susan Cain.

[1:59:09] Is that the episode where they do the whole song and dance?

[1:59:11] There is a man, a certain man.

[1:59:13] Exactly, that's directly.

[1:59:15] And also, I think we all have that moment in our lives

[1:59:18] that it's just universal when we're shocked

[1:59:20] to find out that Rooster's Millions is a story

[1:59:23] that goes back, like, 100 years.

[1:59:24] Mm.

[1:59:25] And they've made multiple films of it,

[1:59:27] and not just the one with John Williams on it.

[1:59:30] I've never seen Rooster's Millions.

[1:59:32] Is it the same as, that's with Richard Pryor, right?

[1:59:35] Yeah, I mean, one of them.

[1:59:36] Is it the same as The Toy?

[1:59:38] No.

[1:59:39] No, not the same as The Toy.

[1:59:41] Oh, boy.

[1:59:41] I mean, I didn't buy the fucking tickets, dude.

[1:59:43] I was a little kid.

[1:59:44] I mean, the toy that my parents hired bought the tickets.

[1:59:54] Last lemon.

[1:59:55] And even in The Toy, there's a part

[1:59:56] where there's a painting that is, there's a nude.

[2:00:00] version of it they press a button and the clothes come off of it and that I

[2:00:03] think is a is a take off of what artist is it I forget who did who did this a

[2:00:09] twin portraits of this one woman one where she has clothes on where she has

[2:00:12] clothes off and as a kid I was just like that's crazy and now I'm like they're

[2:00:16] trying to put like a fine art joke in the toy because that was wasted on the

[2:00:20] audience or maybe the people that I babysat for had one of those pens and

[2:00:23] when you click it the clothes they come off yeah yeah there's a you would turn

[2:00:29] the pen upside down the clothes would come on there was like an athletic

[2:00:38] center that they used to have in my school a rec center I'm sorry right but

[2:00:42] it was like a sports club it was like a it was like an athletic club that they

[2:00:45] would have this community event possible to bulldoze it okay there was a once a

[2:01:01] year there's like this community event that my family would force the whole

[2:01:04] family would go to my parents are forces to go to and in the men's room the

[2:01:07] light switch the light switch plate was had a drawing of a tennis player with

[2:01:12] his pants down and look on his face like oh no and the light switch was his I

[2:01:16] guess in the place of his penis in order to turn the light on or off you had to

[2:01:20] flick his penis and I remember being like this is weird you would think you

[2:01:25] would be much happier about this situation and I said to the men's room

[2:01:28] because women upon seeing this light switch would be unable to control

[2:01:31] themselves last letter this is from Aaron and Emily I hope I am pronouncing

[2:01:44] their names correctly but now Dan Aaron and Emily writes hello my fiance and I

[2:01:52] are big fans of the flop house we're getting married in October and we'd love

[2:01:57] to be regulations we'd love to be able to play the flop house theme song at our

[2:02:02] wedding immediately after our ceremony the flop house theme song has been the

[2:02:06] prelude so many hours of entertainment and happiness and it seems fitting that

[2:02:11] we use it at the opening to our new life together I think the normal flop house

[2:02:16] IP fee of seven hundred thousand dollars may be somewhat outside of our budget

[2:02:21] but if you give us permission to use the song I promise to bake you an

[2:02:25] award-winning pie thanks Aaron and Emily now I took the liberty to already

[2:02:30] give the permission for this but I will I'm here to tell you that there the pie

[2:02:43] in question is in my fridge at this moment is this the part of the portion

[2:02:48] of the show where we eat pie what will be as exciting as the time we open gifts

[2:03:07] most popular type of video anyone that was our podcast opening opening presents

[2:03:22] quit your bars I could quit doing what I love which is being a dad if the thing

[2:03:31] we're opening was like a true crime murder we would be the most popular

[2:03:34] podcast yeah they're opening boxes and there's unsolved mysteries inside number

[2:03:42] one someone out there is let's say what no I don't want to insult them a delightful

[2:03:54] person who wants to put our five our song in their wedding yeah I think it's

[2:03:57] like a harebrained scheme to me but I love it I love it I love it that it's

[2:04:02] that important to them I think it's fantastic it's wonderful I don't like

[2:04:05] the way I'm finding out about this after everything's been said and done baked

[2:04:12] and said I did not want to it seemed like it seemed like a request that I did

[2:04:17] not want to make them leave them hanging on the telephone if you will oh like in

[2:04:22] the blondie song which is actually not a blondie song it's a nerves song but a

[2:04:25] lot of people know it's a blondie cover when I found that out I was surprised

[2:04:27] yeah now is if this does uh what what flavor of pie is it Dan is a bourbon

[2:04:33] pecan pie okay at least it doesn't have fruit so Ellie it's allowed to eat it

[2:04:37] yeah I just say like do not send a fruit pie you should have just told them to

[2:04:42] make it a meat pie perhaps made out of a freshly shaved Londoner yeah yeah Dan

[2:04:50] that was that was the right call I mean you could have emailed us and said hey

[2:04:52] is this cool but you know I don't think that we're gonna get really that worried

[2:04:56] about our theme song IP I don't think I don't think Pachelbel gets called up

[2:05:00] when his cannon is used in people's weddings they're shooting off cannons at

[2:05:05] people's weddings it's the old man from Mary Poppins getting married no it's

[2:05:10] good you're right Taco Bell is not getting called

[2:05:15] you ordered Pachelbel's cannon from the DJ and they're like I got Taco Bell's

[2:05:19] cannon and it's just that it's just the bell sound and maybe like that Spanish

[2:05:23] version of the we are young song what if their walk down the aisle goes viral

[2:05:29] and they do some kind of a flash mob and then you don't get any of that flash

[2:05:33] mob internet money speaking as someone who has seen his creative work go viral

[2:05:39] and receive zero pennies for it whatever yeah no I am delighted that we have been

[2:05:47] able to contribute in any small way to this room and if it's so important that

[2:05:52] they want to make a part of the wedding that I'm really touched and I'm really

[2:05:54] happy that we were and I think I think Dan's taking his lumps and it's time to

[2:05:58] move on to the next part of the podcast Wow okay the next segment is Dan Lumps

[2:06:05] We gotta get to that pie! I assume Dan just saw the word pie and just wrote yes yes yes last

[2:06:13] segment is of course recommendations of movies that we have seen and enjoyed

[2:06:20] that you know even if we were pretty pleasant on on this silly movie maybe

[2:06:27] you should watch instead of meatballs part two and my is inspired my

[2:06:33] recommendation is inspired by meatballs part two I said earlier that one of you

[2:06:39] larger roles for one of the head counselors in this movie is a guy who's

[2:06:45] been a lot of Joe Dante movies I have not seen a lot of movies recently that I

[2:06:50] was like this is great I got a recommend on the podcast so I'm gonna go back to a

[2:06:55] Joe Dante movie that is little seen compared to some of the other ones

[2:06:59] that's matinee where John Goodman stars is basically a William Castle type I

[2:07:05] would say John Goodman is not the star of the movie well I'd say the teens are the stars

[2:07:09] there's a bunch of teens John Goodman is the big name in the movie so much of

[2:07:12] teens it's in a small town with a with a there's they're having a movie premiere

[2:07:18] there John Goodman as I said before it's a William Castle type who like is an

[2:07:23] exploitation filmmaker with a gimmick for every movie and his newest movie is

[2:07:28] Matt it's taking place during the Cuban Missile Crisis they through several

[2:07:35] shenanigans they think that the nukes are flying you know laughs and nostalgia

[2:07:40] ensue if you like old movies I was just looking at Twitter is Dan recommending

[2:07:46] matinee you know it no I didn't recommend it but I remember seeing it in

[2:07:52] the theater when I was a little shaver I really like Matt Matt Nate like look I

[2:07:57] really like Joe Dante movies in general like matinee I feel like the it starts

[2:08:02] out a little slowly but it snowballs really nicely I feel like by the end of

[2:08:07] the movie everything is firing really well and it's just very funny and

[2:08:12] enjoyable and just like is that the one where they like either put the tingler

[2:08:18] in the in the theater seats or they're like trying to one-up the tinglers yes

[2:08:24] basically that yeah firing on all cylinders you know if you've got any

[2:08:29] affection for like the idea of like exploitation filmmaking making it all

[2:08:35] now I think by exploitation filmmaking we should make sure what you mean is be

[2:08:38] movies you don't mean this is not grindhouse movie no I'm not like these

[2:08:42] are Vincent price I like blood sucking freaks or whatever no this is like this

[2:08:45] is like a movie where they're like in spook a vision and it means a scale yeah

[2:08:49] whatever 13 ghosts all that stuff well I'm gonna just make it 12 ghosts what's

[2:08:55] that 13th goes doing for you now you have an odd number of seats in the

[2:08:58] tables a baker's dozen of ghosts what bakers have sent out ghosts devil's

[2:09:03] dozen of ghosts you get to eat the one ghost on the way home and you still get

[2:09:06] to go home with it doesn't go well the lucky one is the one who has the ghost

[2:09:09] with the little toy in it and they win they're the king of Christmas well in

[2:09:20] I'm gonna have to say I was inspired by meatballs part two of course I'm gonna

[2:09:25] recommend another summer movie that's right I'm recommending Midsummer title

[2:09:31] and boy what a blast we have it's the second feature directed by Ari Aster

[2:09:37] it's about a couple of young college kids just trying to have a little bit of

[2:09:42] fun in in the Sun and so they traveled to Sweden to examine some of the

[2:09:49] cultural anthropology of some of the summer festivals there and let's just

[2:09:54] say things go a little bit off the rails the movies fun

[2:10:00] does exactly what you think it's going to do all the time in a great way. It's super

[2:10:04] fun. Watch it. Midsommar by Ari Aster. Recommended by me, Stuart.

[2:10:08] And I'm going to recommend another movie of the summer, I guess, in that it's summer right

[2:10:15] now, so if you watch it, it becomes a movie of the summer. I recently watched The Sisters

[2:10:18] Brothers starring Joaquin Phoenix and John C. Reilly and Jake Gyllenhaal and Riz Ahmed,

[2:10:25] and it is a Western, but it is a Western that vacillates wildly between comedy and

[2:10:32] not comedy, and I really liked that it was a movie where I thought I knew where it was

[2:10:37] going and I thought I knew what was happening and I did not know where it was going and

[2:10:40] what was happening, not in the sense of there's no twist that makes you rethink things, but

[2:10:45] just that the movie's tone is kind of free with where it goes, and it was one of Joaquin

[2:10:52] Phoenix's funnier performances that I've seen recently, and he's someone who can be

[2:10:55] very funny when he wants to be. Yeah, like in You Were Never Really Here. Yeah, exactly.

[2:11:00] And one of John C. Reilly's more, like, I feel like he's fallen, most things I see with

[2:11:06] him in nowadays are like Holmes and Watson type things, because he likes being a clown.

[2:11:12] He's got, like, such a soul to him. Yeah, like, we need to talk about Kevin. Yeah, exactly.

[2:11:15] We'll goof him up. Yeah, something like that. Well, not all of his movies, but lately. Anyway,

[2:11:20] I really liked it a lot, and I couldn't tell where it was going from moment to moment,

[2:11:23] and it surprised me, and it was a little bit like, I don't know, if someone gave, like,

[2:11:28] an art filmmaker enough money to get some big stars to make a Western, and I really liked it.

[2:11:33] It was the closest I've come to seeing a movie that reminded me of the book The Hawkeye Monster,

[2:11:38] so if you like the book The Hawkeye Monster, go see The Sisters Brothers. Okay, this is

[2:11:43] completely unrelated to all the movies that you guys recommended, and it has nothing to do with

[2:11:48] the summer, but I did see it recently on a plane. Okay. I recently re-watched The Devil

[2:11:56] Wears Prada, and I would like to recommend two-thirds of it. Okay, which two-thirds?

[2:12:02] The first two-thirds of it. Mainly for the scene where Emily Blunt sees your friend,

[2:12:11] your friend Anne Hathaway, sees her after she gets a makeover, and she does that slow motion,

[2:12:16] jaw drop, like, no way. You're recommending the two-thirds that don't have Adrienne Greene in them.

[2:12:26] Yes, exactly. It stars Meryl Streep. As the titular devil. As the titular devil,

[2:12:34] and she does an amazing performance, and I feel like the movie that I watched seemed to say,

[2:12:43] work really hard, and you can be as awesome as this Meryl Streep character, and it seemed like

[2:12:50] the movie took a turn at the end and was trying to say the opposite, so don't watch the end.

[2:12:56] That's stupid. Just watch it up until after she gets the makeover.

[2:13:02] Yeah, and she's on the top of her game. My friends are like, you've changed. It's like,

[2:13:09] you knew me in college, I hope I changed, because I was eating fucking ramen and sleeping on a

[2:13:15] mattress surrounded by reptiles magazines and porno mags. And her boyfriend is a chef,

[2:13:22] and he doesn't understand that she works long hours. That drives me crazy.

[2:13:27] I kind of feel like a lot of these movies that have the same arc in them, these Hollywood movies

[2:13:34] are written by people who are in Hollywood and are like, okay, I'm in a high-pressure job where

[2:13:41] there's a lot of competition. I need to discourage people from trying to excel.

[2:13:46] Yeah, maybe that's it. It's like, if you work really hard, you're never going to get a boyfriend.

[2:13:52] It's like, yeah, no one wants that boyfriend. Just work.

[2:13:56] Yeah, it's like, do you think that the person who's writing all those sitcoms where women get

[2:14:02] jobs at magazines is like, I'm dying to have a job at the Just Shoot Me magazine. There's no way

[2:14:11] if all these young women keep taking my job, I won't be able to take it. So I need to discourage

[2:14:16] them from getting that job. I mean, I think what it really comes down

[2:14:21] to is people who don't know what they're writing about, and then basing them on old story forms

[2:14:28] that we have, in many ways, sloughed off so much reptile skin. Sorry to get you hot and bothered.

[2:14:33] Yeah, I mean, that was the old Stewart. The Devil Wears Prada, that was like a

[2:14:38] Romana Clef. The woman who wrote that worked for, what's-her-face?

[2:14:41] Anna Wintour? Anna Wintour.

[2:14:43] Oh, what's her face? No, my point is she would theoretically actually

[2:14:51] know what it is to have that job. Hey, Dan, I'm going to let you in on a little

[2:14:54] secret. What?

[2:14:56] Movies are often different than the real things they're based on, and I'm willing to bet that

[2:15:02] the person who wrote the movie did not write the book, and I'm also willing to bet that

[2:15:06] the person who wrote the book made up some stuff. And so, Dan, I think when it was not

[2:15:13] released as The Devil Wears Prada, an investigative report with a Pulitzer Prize on it.

[2:15:19] Wait a minute, this isn't actually Prada? With a letter from the Times Ombudsman saying,

[2:15:23] Yes, we've checked all this. This is a script written by Mike Daisy.

[2:15:31] Wow. That's a good reference.

[2:15:33] Great, great joke. Specific audience.

[2:15:37] Yeah, when it wasn't The Devil Wears Prada Part 4, Means of Ascent by Robert Caro, that's

[2:15:42] when you should know that maybe they took some liberties in the Anna Wintour story.

[2:15:46] All right, fair enough. Hey, guys, it's been a delight, and I thank you, Charlene.

[2:15:52] Thanks for having me.

[2:15:54] Yeah, thank you for being here. Thank you for picking this movie. I agree with Elliot.

[2:15:57] I feel like we should do all of the Meatballs movies now.

[2:15:59] We might have to. The writer's right in. Should we do the other Meatballs movies?

[2:16:03] Bring back Charlene and do the whole Meatballs quadrilogy.

[2:16:08] But until next time, you know, well, quick, we'll say, do all the regular stuff.

[2:16:14] Write us a good review on iTunes if you feel so inclined. Tweet about us.

[2:16:18] Meet about us. Feed about us.

[2:16:20] And visit us at Minnie's Bar, 885 4th Avenue.

[2:16:25] In what town is that?

[2:16:27] Brooklyn, New York.

[2:16:28] Okay, so they can't just go to any 4th Avenue.

[2:16:31] So what was the address again?

[2:16:32] 885 4th Avenue.

[2:16:34] If your town has an 885 4th Avenue, just give it a shot.

[2:16:38] Maybe Minnie's is there.

[2:16:41] And if you get some tickets for the live shows, they're going fast.

[2:16:44] So get them now before they're gone.

[2:16:47] Go to MaximumFun.org, listen to the other shows.

[2:16:49] Dan will announce the winner of that t-shirt contest.

[2:16:51] I will very soon.

[2:16:53] And maybe if you get a free moment, do something nice for somebody who's not you.

[2:16:58] Just try to make the world a better place.

[2:17:00] Like and subscribe. Become a Maximum Fun donor.

[2:17:04] I think we'll have some new bonus episodes showing up soon.

[2:17:07] But now that that's all in the rear view, we can sign off.

[2:17:12] I feel like that would be your movie company would be Rear View Productions.

[2:17:17] And the animated production logo is you looking at a butt.

[2:17:21] Maybe in a rear view mirror.

[2:17:23] TM! TM! TM!

[2:17:24] And you're like pulling those shades down the bridge of your nose.

[2:17:28] You know it.

[2:17:30] Everyone is advising me against it.

[2:17:32] Like everyone of us.

[2:17:34] You sure you want some of your production logo?

[2:17:36] I want this at the beginning and end of all shows and movies that Rear View Productions puts together.

[2:17:40] With my name plastered all over it.

[2:17:42] Including Jeffrey Wright's lawyers who are like,

[2:17:44] my client has copywritten the way he wears glasses.

[2:17:48] But anyway.

[2:17:52] His glasses just can't stay up on top of that nose.

[2:17:54] Thank you all for listening.

[2:17:56] It's been a blast to all be in the same room together.

[2:17:59] And to have Charlene here.

[2:18:01] But for The Flop House, I've been Dan McCoy.

[2:18:03] Hey, I'm Stuart Wellington.

[2:18:05] Hey, Kaelin over here.

[2:18:07] Charlene Wellington.

[2:18:09] In the words of our pal Meatball.

[2:18:11] That's right.

[2:18:13] Gutta bye moolahs.

[2:18:15] Alright.

[2:18:17] And his name is Meathead.

[2:18:31] Gabriel was eating all my mashed potatoes at dinner.

[2:18:33] Oh man, were you mad at him?

[2:18:35] I was gonna be, but he's so cutie.

[2:18:37] And also, I literally have to take the mashed potatoes on a fork

[2:18:39] and put the fork in his mouth and he eats them.

[2:18:41] So I could have stopped him.

[2:18:43] You're part of the crime.

[2:18:45] Yeah, exactly. But I felt pressured.

[2:18:47] Well, I say, I say.

[2:18:49] This baby can't be convicted

[2:18:51] for the crime of stealing

[2:18:53] mashed potatoes.

[2:18:55] I'd like to hear

[2:18:57] from the defendant.

[2:18:59] Bah bah bah bah bah bah.

[2:19:02] My case rests, Your Honor.

[2:19:04] Would the court reporter read that back, please?

[2:19:06] Bah bah bah bah bah bah.

Ep.#290 - Meatballs Part II

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