FH Mini 4 - A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

Dan McCoy

[0:00] Broadcasting live from the heart of the tire fire we're living in, it's a Flophouse Mini,

[0:12] starring me, Dan McCoy.

[0:14] Oh, and me, Stuart Wellington.

Elliott Kalan

[0:17] And over here, in sunny Los Angeles, Elliot Kalin.

[0:21] Dan, how come you can't bring that level of energy to the regular show?

Dan McCoy

[0:25] Well, this is desperate hysteria, Elliot.

Elliott Kalan

[0:30] Or is it that you're like, I only have so much energy, and for a regular episode it's got to last an hour and a half,

[0:34] but this time it's only got to be ten minutes.

Dan McCoy

[0:37] That's possible. It's also possible that I'm just happy to see other human faces.

Stuart Wellington

[0:42] It's kind of like when we went on a cruise to Alaska, and we went on a tour of an Alaskan sled dog training facility.

Dan McCoy

[0:51] Cool.

Stuart Wellington

[0:51] The sled dog team dragged us around on a little golf cart thing that was much heavier than an Iditarod sled.

[1:00] But they only did it for a brief period of time.

[1:02] So Dan is a lot like those very friendly, happy sled dogs, who are also very muscly athletes.

[1:08] Sounds like Dan.

Dan McCoy

[1:10] I thought this was leading into a description of how this being dragged around by happy sled dogs was the happiest any of us have ever been.

Stuart Wellington

[1:20] It was one of the happiest moments of my life.

[1:23] Yeah.

[1:24] Don't worry, when this mini goes up, I will post some video of these happy doggies.

[1:29] Oh, nice.

Elliott Kalan

[1:30] There's no way it's going to match the best video from that vacation.

[1:34] Dan performing in the Voice of the Sea competition.

Stuart Wellington

[1:37] That's true.

[1:38] That was actually the happiest moment of my life, and I kept staring at the heavens.

[1:42] Please, strike me dead, for I don't want to experience anything else.

Dan McCoy

[1:46] Yeah, it was a little insulting to see the video that you took and to hear you and Charlene laughing the whole time.

Elliott Kalan

[1:52] Dan, honestly, what do you think their reaction was going to be?

[1:55] Were they going to be like, whoa, he's really doing it.

[1:58] He's amazing.

Stuart Wellington

[2:00] Yeah, like we're watching a dinosaur skateboard.

Elliott Kalan

[2:05] Call up your cousin, Chuck Berry, because this is the sound he's been looking for.

Dan McCoy

[2:10] We're out to sea, guys.

[2:12] I thought that they would be transfixed by my siren song.

Elliott Kalan

[2:15] Sure, sure.

[2:16] Well, maybe their ears were full of beeswax, you know, much like Odysseus himself.

Stuart Wellington

[2:21] Well, that was the thing.

[2:21] All of our friends' ears were filled with beeswax, but not me.

[2:24] I had them tie me to my chair so I could experience the glory of Dan's voice.

Dan McCoy

[2:30] Smart idea.

[2:31] So, guys, we don't really have a format for the Flophouse minis, but in so much as we have had one in the past,

[2:38] it's been people tweeting topics at us and us addressing them.

[2:42] But we're going to do something a little different.

[2:44] I don't think we want to get necessarily stuck in that for every Flophouse mini, but do a lot of those probably.

[2:50] But, Ellie, what's your format change?

[2:53] What are we doing this time?

Elliott Kalan

[2:54] I thought, you know, guys, I would give everybody a little peek into what's going on in the creative firmament that is my house right now.

[3:03] Because, as everyone knows, there is a lot of bad stuff going around.

[3:08] And as a result, my family has been staying inside for days, which many families are.

[3:14] And I think many families are doing what we are doing, which is going insane.

[3:19] Sure.

[3:19] And, you know, just going from that point where it's like, oh, this is family togetherness to the point where it's like the movie Cube.

[3:28] Uh-huh.

[3:28] Yeah.

[3:28] Or, you know, anything where people have to spend the night in a haunted house and only one can survive, you know, to win the money.

Stuart Wellington

[3:35] Yeah, like an existential nightmare.

Elliott Kalan

[3:37] Yes, that's the way that Gabriel, my 19-month-old, described it earlier today.

Dan McCoy

[3:42] Uh-huh.

[3:42] It is kind of extreme patience therapy, though.

[3:46] I've tried looking at it that way to make myself feel better about it.

[3:50] Because if Audrey and I feel like on the verge of an argument, it's like, okay, I'm just going to stop right now because we cannot go anywhere else.

Elliott Kalan

[4:02] And do you always do it in the movie phone voice?

Dan McCoy

[4:05] Yeah.

[4:05] You have selected lower tension.

Elliott Kalan

[4:10] Yeah.

[4:10] If you would like to continue lowering the tension, press one.

[4:13] If you would like to return to the argument and raise the tension, press two.

[4:17] You have chosen two.

[4:19] Very surprising.

[4:21] If you would like me to keep the subject of the argument around this specific minor thing, press one.

[4:27] If you would like me to extrapolate to deeper personal issues between us, press two.

[4:32] Oh, wow.

[4:33] Two.

[4:33] Wow.

[4:34] Okay.

[4:35] If you would like me to refer to a private thing you shared with me that is very hurtful to you, press one.

[4:41] If you would like me to guilt you over something you have done to me that I previously said I forgave you for but secretly was still holding on to in the back of my mind, press two.

[4:52] This is very revealing.

Stuart Wellington

[4:54] What I love is that at some point she must have selected the bitchy reaction to her responses button.

[5:04] Oh, wow.

[5:05] Are you sure?

[5:07] Oofa doofa.

Elliott Kalan

[5:08] Oh, I've been burned.

[5:11] That's more of like a soundboard or like one of those machines you get at the drugstore that just has a bunch of different sounds.

[5:16] You know the one.

[5:17] Dan, you have one, right?

[5:18] Sound machine?

[5:18] Never heard of it.

Dan McCoy

[5:19] Yeah, I've got a – well, it's made in Miami.

[5:21] I call it the made in Miami sound machine.

[5:25] There's probably a shorter way of saying that.

[5:27] Yeah, I think you could lop off at least two words.

Elliott Kalan

[5:30] Okay, now, guys, what I wanted to share with you was that out of nowhere, not in any way inspired by me, not prompt in any way, my son, my older son, Samuel, has decided to write a book.

[5:44] And he has – out of nowhere, he's just started writing it.

[5:47] First, he was dictating it to me, and then he started typing it himself.

[5:50] And I just thought I'd share with you guys and maybe the world at large a little bit of his work on it.

[5:55] It's a work in progress.

[5:56] He has been revising it as he goes.

[5:59] So –

[5:59] But he told me –

Dan McCoy

[6:01] Do you want notes on this or –

[6:03] No, I don't think so.

Elliott Kalan

[6:05] But, I mean, tell me and maybe I'll tell him.

[6:06] But he told me it was okay.

[6:07] He gave me permission to share it with the podcast audience.

[6:10] Okay.

[6:10] Even though he never – he doesn't even want me to tell my family members the title because he doesn't want to spoil it.

[6:15] But I said, could I read some of it on the podcast?

[6:17] And he said, yes.

[6:18] So –

Stuart Wellington

[6:19] Now, this isn't some kind of like –

[6:20] You know, I understand that.

[6:21] This isn't some kind of like backdoor pilot for like my son wrote a porno or something, right?

[6:26] I mean, it is amateur erotic fiction, if that's what you're wondering about.

[6:30] He should never have been in the room when we did that Veronica episode.

Dan McCoy

[6:33] He said he has to –

[6:34] He was not in the room.

[6:36] I want to clarify this for people who have wondered this on Twitter.

[6:40] Because we had to cut out a bunch of Max Fund Drive talk, our editor, Jordan Cowling, took out a lot of Sammy who was there to pluck on the heartstrings.

[6:53] And one of the things that got lost was him leaving the room.

Elliott Kalan

[6:59] So it's easy to believe that he was just there as we talked about the many inappropriate things in Veronica.

Stuart Wellington

[7:05] Let's just say NSFW content.

Elliott Kalan

[7:10] Yeah.

[7:11] Not safe for – I mean, nobody's working right now.

[7:15] So not safe for what, like walruses?

[7:17] I mean, there's plenty of people working, Elliot.

Stuart Wellington

[7:19] There's people that deliver your food, bring you groceries, all those sorts of things.

Elliott Kalan

[7:24] Lots of people are working.

[7:25] You're right, Stuart.

[7:25] Lots of people are working, and I'm very glad they are because they're keeping our world alive.

[7:30] But speaking of keeping things alive, perhaps I'll keep your spirit of suspense and thrills alive.

[7:36] Oh, wow.

[7:36] With a little bit of a – with a little preview of this book by Sammy.

[7:40] He's entitled it The Mystery of the Stinky Cheese.

[7:42] The title was the first thing he told us about.

[7:44] And Dan, I know you love mysteries.

[7:46] And Stuart, I know you love stink.

[7:47] So it's right up your alley.

Dan McCoy

[7:49] I think we both love cheese, too.

[7:51] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[7:51] Stuart, you know, you've got – it has a little tummy problem for you, I guess.

Stuart Wellington

[7:55] It does.

[7:56] Thank you for bringing that up in front of everybody, Dan.

Dan McCoy

[8:01] I'm sorry.

[8:02] The most common stomach issue that anyone has that lactose does not agree with you all the time.

Elliott Kalan

[8:09] Actually, Dan, the most common stomach issue is hunger.

[8:12] Oh, wow.

Dan McCoy

[8:15] Are we trying to out-correct each other?

[8:17] Is that what's going on?

[8:19] I think we are.

[8:20] Earlier on, I had to correct Elliot about how time zones work.

[8:23] So I guess I had mine already off air.

Elliott Kalan

[8:25] Yeah, that's true.

[8:26] And you corrected me hard.

[8:27] You really rubbed it in.

[8:28] So The Mystery of the Stinky Cheese.

[8:31] This is a novel.

[8:32] It's multiple chapters.

[8:33] So chapter one.

[8:34] Are you ready?

[8:35] Uh-huh.

[8:35] Yes.

[8:36] Okay.

[8:36] The Mystery of the Stinky Cheese by Samuel Kalen.

[8:38] Okay.

[8:39] Chapter one.

[8:40] Mm-hmm.

[8:41] There once was a place called Mouseville.

[8:43] And in Mouseville, there was a contest with who had the most cheese in Mouseville.

[8:48] But everyone did not have their cheese because someone stole it overnight.

[8:52] It was in a big case and someone stole it.

[8:55] The mystery begins.

[8:57] That's the end of chapter one.

[8:58] Oh, wow.

[8:59] Oh, wow.

[9:00] That's a teaser.

[9:01] That was when he wrote that line.

[9:03] I was like, thank you.

[9:04] Yes.

[9:04] Beautiful.

[9:05] I love it.

Stuart Wellington

[9:06] Well, I like that he leans fully into the brand of Mouseville by mentioning it multiple times.

Dan McCoy

[9:11] Even within the same sentence.

[9:13] Yeah.

[9:13] He's establishing it.

[9:14] Yeah.

[9:14] It's IP building.

[9:15] I mean, he's created a world right off.

[9:18] And I love how he eschews like kind of a normal narrator style to go for more of like sort of, you know, someone introducing a movie on television.

[9:30] Like, the mystery begins.

Elliott Kalan

[9:32] Mm-hmm.

[9:32] Something like that.

[9:33] Okay.

[9:33] Yeah.

[9:33] Chapter two.

[9:34] Beginning of the mystery.

[9:36] Chapter one did not have a chapter title, but the rest of the chapters have titles.

[9:39] Chapter two.

[9:39] Beginning of the mystery.

[9:41] And the kind of person that stole the cheese is obviously easy, but we don't know which one of them stole it.

[9:47] They are mean to Mouseville because they are tigers.

[9:49] Even though the mice are...

[9:51] Wait.

[9:51] This is where there's a twist.

[9:53] Even though the mice are bigger than the tigers, the mice cannot defeat them.

[9:57] What?

[9:58] Yeah, you told me I could read it.

[10:00] No, I didn't.

[10:01] Uh-oh.

[10:01] Sammy, do you want to come in?

[10:02] Hold on.

[10:03] Oh.

Dan McCoy

[10:04] Sammy, come on.

[10:05] Oh, Sammy is now interrupting and saying that I can't read it.

Elliott Kalan

[10:07] Sammy, come on over.

[10:09] No, it's okay.

Dan McCoy

[10:10] Straight from the bath, I assume.

Elliott Kalan

[10:12] I mean, I have some clarifying questions.

[10:15] No, he can't hear you because he doesn't have headphones on.

[10:17] Sammy, would you like to tell them, are you saying I can't read any more of the story?

[10:20] Uh-huh.

[10:20] Okay, because you told me before that I could read it on the podcast, but you changed your mind?

[10:23] Uh-huh.

[10:24] Okay, do you want to talk about it at all?

Dan McCoy

[10:25] No.

[10:26] Okay, what was the inspiration for it?

Elliott Kalan

[10:28] He just shrugged his shoulders.

[10:29] Oh, wow.

[10:29] Sammy, I will respect your wishes and I will read no more of it, okay?

[10:32] I was just proud of it.

Dan McCoy

[10:34] But okay, have a good night.

[10:35] Bye, Daddy.

[10:36] Okay, bye, Daddy.

Elliott Kalan

[10:36] Have a good night.

[10:37] Bye, Daddy.

[10:37] But you're Sammy.

[10:38] Bye, Sammy.

[10:39] I love you.

Dan McCoy

[10:39] Oh, weird.

[10:40] Yeah, I called him Daddy by accident.

[10:42] That was weird.

[10:42] I'm never going to get any closure on this story.

[10:43] You've got to promise me, Elliot, that eventually when, you know, Sammy's a little more willing

[10:48] to share that I get a little closure because the idea, I was taken by surprise by a number

[10:54] of things in just those few sentences of Jeff or two.

Elliott Kalan

[10:57] He is a master of twists and turns.

[10:59] He is constantly surprising you.

[11:02] I think it was A.E.

[11:03] Van Voight who said that you needed a story twist like every 300 words and he's beaten that

[11:09] limit.

[11:09] I'm not even going to mention to you the volcano that shoots cheese.

[11:14] What?

[11:16] And I think I won't tell you about the big battle that ends when a mysterious riddle message

[11:22] appears and everybody is frozen in place and that's when the detective comes in.

[11:26] So there's...

[11:27] God damn it.

[11:29] You know what?

[11:30] I will...

[11:32] Actually, you know what?

[11:33] I'll give you just a teaser.

[11:34] Maybe he won't be upset about this.

[11:37] Okay?

[11:37] Okay.

[11:37] This is...

[11:37] I'll just read you the beginning of one chapter and a little bit in the middle of one.

[11:40] This is the beginning of chapter seven, which is called chapter seven, five o'clock.

[11:44] The detective was coming at five o'clock in the morning.

[11:46] He woke up at two o'clock in the morning.

[11:48] He did not like it.

[11:49] His brother woke him up.

[11:51] Then he had a real mystery to solve.

[11:52] So that's based on reality, which is Sammy's little brother waking him up.

[11:57] And then at the end, chapter eight, another plan.

[12:01] So the detective comes in.

[12:04] He was there.

[12:05] Hi.

[12:05] He said, I am here.

[12:06] Why?

[12:07] Because I woke up late.

[12:08] I slept in today.

[12:10] You are late.

[12:10] As late as you can be.

[12:12] Why are you staring at me?

[12:13] I'm not staring at you.

[12:14] You are still staring.

[12:16] So that's a dumb dialogue between the detective and somebody else there.

[12:18] So I guess that's all I can share with you because I'm going to respect Sammy's wishes

[12:22] and not tell you anymore.

[12:23] Oh, man.

Stuart Wellington

[12:25] What a...

[12:26] I mean, the art of the trailer there, first off.

[12:28] Like, you're just giving up just enough of a taste.

[12:31] Yeah.

[12:31] Without spoiling the whole plot.

Elliott Kalan

[12:33] That was the teaser release.

[12:34] That was the teaser.

[12:34] And maybe I'll talk to him.

[12:35] Maybe he'll allow me to reveal some more.

Dan McCoy

[12:38] But, you know.

[12:39] Yeah, Stuart, I'm starting to think that this is kind of a little suspicious.

[12:42] I think maybe he always meant to give us one taste for free.

[12:46] And now he's counting on the money that's going to roll in once this gets published.

Stuart Wellington

[12:51] Yeah, it's weird.

[12:51] On this Skype call, there's this Patreon link that keeps popping up.

Elliott Kalan

[12:57] Yeah, Sammy is really into crowdfunding and crowdsourcing.

[13:02] And he says...

[13:03] And crowd surfing.

[13:04] And crowd surfing.

[13:05] You can't take him to a concert because he will just climb on that stage and he'll just jump onto people's hands.

[13:10] And then he'll start stealing their rings and their watches.

[13:14] He's kind of like the Artful Dodger if the Artful Dodger went to a lot more concerts.

[13:18] Uh-huh.

[13:19] Uh-huh.

[13:19] Well, yeah.

[13:20] I'm sorry, guys, that this is just a teaser.

[13:22] You know, this is just the teaser dropping.

[13:24] But that's the way that modern entertainment is.

[13:25] First, you advertise that the teaser is dropping.

[13:27] Yeah.

[13:28] And the teaser drops to reveal the release date.

Stuart Wellington

[13:30] The teaser of the teaser.

[13:32] Yeah, I'm familiar.

[13:33] Yeah, like that Batonville in the teaser.

[13:35] Yeah, they show me that.

[13:37] They show me one shot of Vin Diesel surfing on a car and then catching a different car.

[13:41] And I'm like, what?

Elliott Kalan

[13:43] Wait, wait.

[13:43] Catching a different car like in his hands?

Stuart Wellington

[13:45] Yeah, like the car flips and he catches it with his hands.

Dan McCoy

[13:48] Yeah, or the shot where he somehow manages to drive along a suspension bridge, like a rope bridge that has fallen off on one side.

[13:57] But he's going so fast that he can continue to drive up the slats.

Elliott Kalan

[14:01] Is he singing Defying Gravity from Wicked?

[14:04] Yeah.

[14:05] Now, wait.

[14:06] I haven't seen this teaser.

[14:07] So he catches a car in his hands?

Stuart Wellington

[14:10] Yeah, yeah.

[14:10] Just watch it.

[14:11] It's on F9.

[14:12] No, no.

[14:12] But so where do his hands go on the car?

[14:14] So he's surfing on top of the car.

[14:16] Just press F9 on your keyboard.

Elliott Kalan

[14:19] Dan, I have a Mac keyboard.

[14:20] There's no function keys.

[14:22] It's not going to work.

Stuart Wellington

[14:23] So hit the function key and then hit the 9 key.

Elliott Kalan

[14:26] Hit the fast and the furious key.

[14:33] I was in a Zoom meeting the other day and I was typing too fast.

[14:37] I accidentally hit the fast and furious key and suddenly my computer froze up and it was just Vin Diesel catching cars on my screen.

[14:44] So he catches it.

[14:45] Wait.

[14:46] So he's like, I don't understand.

[14:47] Does he catch it by like he grabs onto part of it?

Stuart Wellington

[14:50] I know.

[14:50] I know you want me to paint a word picture, but it's very difficult, Elliot.

[14:53] So imagine Dominic Toretto.

[14:57] Dominic Toretto is surfing on top of a muscle car.

[15:01] Now, is he surfing on water?

[15:02] No, he's standing on top of the muscle car.

[15:05] So he's like Styles.

[15:06] He's like van surfing like Styles.

[15:08] And then one car like flips sideways and it looks like it's going to like land with its top on top of his car.

[15:17] But instead he just catches it.

[15:19] But how does he lift a car?

[15:21] Elliot, that's the question I'm asking.

[15:23] That's the question that that trailer brings up.

[15:26] And only the movie can answer it.

Elliott Kalan

[15:28] Because I know the movie is – I know the movie – the Fast and Furious movies have gotten pretty unrealistic.

[15:33] But like does he get a – like are they saying that he has super strength now or is it just that he only has power over cars?

Stuart Wellington

[15:39] Well, there's – I mean I think it's both of those things.

[15:42] I mean I feel like those are movies where as long as you're touching your car, you're going to be okay.

Dan McCoy

[15:46] Yeah, I think Stuart is – it definitely looks like he's catching a car but I think it's just because he has his arms out to block it and a car comes wheezing at it.

Stuart Wellington

[15:57] That's how you catch a ball is you put your arms out and block it.

[16:02] Yeah, that's true.

[16:02] You don't block it.

Elliott Kalan

[16:03] You know, you catch it.

[16:05] But the – I mean I wonder – maybe there's a scene where like someone poisons him and he has to get his keys out so he can get into the car in time.

[16:12] Because once he's sitting in the car, nothing – I guess a charm is put on the car early in the movie by a wizard or a pixie or something.

Stuart Wellington

[16:19] Well, there's probably a scene where he has to wrestle Heracles and Heracles keeps letting him heal his wounds by sitting on his car, right?

[16:28] Yeah, yeah, of course.

[16:29] And Heracles realized the only way to stop Dominic Toretto is to lift him up off of mother car.

Dan McCoy

[16:34] Yeah.

[16:35] You know, speaking of Heracles, I thought that – I was very surprised going back to Sammy's story that the tigers were the mice, their enemies.

[16:44] Because I know that at least lions, another big cat, are friends with mice after the thornets.

Elliott Kalan

[16:49] Yeah, Dan, I guess all big cats are the same, racist.

[16:53] Oh, wow.

[16:55] You're the guy who's like – you're running into like a puma at a bar and you're like, hey, out of my way, out of my way, cougar.

[17:02] And he's like, excuse me?

Dan McCoy

[17:04] Excuse me?

[17:05] Yeah.

[17:05] And I go – yeah, no, I was just talking to Courtney Cox, star of Cougar Town.

Elliott Kalan

[17:11] Uh-huh, yep.

[17:12] And the puma's like, oh my god, I'm such a big fan.

[17:15] Monica, can I have your autograph?

[17:16] Oh, that's embarrassing.

[17:17] I called you Monica.

[17:19] Uh-huh.

[17:19] And Dan, you're like, well, I'm not Courtney Cox.

[17:22] Uh-huh.

[17:22] I was talking to her.

[17:23] Yeah.

[17:24] You seem to have gotten me mistaken with her.

[17:25] And he's like, Courtney, you've really changed.

[17:27] You have a beard.

[17:28] You're a man now.

[17:29] Uh-huh.

[17:29] I mean, I love it.

[17:29] These are all good changes.

[17:31] But what are you going to do next in your career?

[17:33] And you're like, well, you know, I'm still at The Daily Show.

[17:35] And he's like, Courtney Cox is on The Daily Show.

[17:36] And that's when I step in and I'm like, guys, there's a big misunderstanding right here.

Dan McCoy

[17:41] Yeah.

[17:42] Well, I mean, this shows that, you know, weaving a tail, you know, just passed down in the Kalen family.

[17:48] Oh, yeah.

[17:48] I mean, where do you think he got it from?

Elliott Kalan

[17:50] Where do you think he got the ability to spin nonsense into yarn and then use that yarn to make a sweater that doesn't quite fit?

[17:57] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[17:58] Yep.

[17:59] Stuart seems...

[18:00] How are you doing over there in that other box, Stuart?

[18:03] That other box?

[18:03] I'm looking at you.

Stuart Wellington

[18:06] Well, you know, I was trying to come up with some kind of story where, like, Elliot and Sammy show up to a woman and they teach her how to spin hay into, like, a bullshit story.

[18:18] Mm-hmm.

[18:20] But they demand a baby in return.

[18:22] You know, that kind of thing.

[18:24] Mm-hmm.

[18:24] And that's how I had my second son.

Dan McCoy

[18:26] And they have to guess your names.

[18:28] And she just pulls out a book of common male names.

[18:31] It's not really that hard.

[18:32] You know, like, it takes a while.

[18:34] Yeah.

[18:34] But she gets to it.

[18:35] But they get to Elliot and Sammy.

[18:36] Yeah.

[18:36] Both.

[18:37] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[18:39] Okay.

[18:39] Wow.

[18:40] So we, man, we got a lot done today here, guys.

Elliott Kalan

[18:42] Yeah.

[18:43] I feel like we accomplished a lot.

[18:45] We could check a lot off our bucket list.

[18:47] I want to apologize to the listeners at home that they only got the barest tip of the iceberg that is Sammy's emerging magnum opus.

[18:56] But maybe I can prevail on him to let me share a little more in the future.

[18:59] Next week, we'll be back to our regular format where, uh, what do we do again on this show?

[19:06] I don't remember.

Dan McCoy

[19:07] Uh, we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it.

[19:08] Right.

[19:09] Right.

Stuart Wellington

[19:09] Like today when Elliot pitches his upcoming paywall content.

[19:16] Okay, guys.

Dan McCoy

[19:17] We'll see you next time.

[19:19] Bye.

[19:20] Bye.

[19:21] Stay safe.

[19:25] Okay.

[19:26] Let's count off two.

[19:28] You ready?

[19:29] Uh-huh.

[19:30] One.

[19:31] Two.

[19:32] Three.

[19:33] Three.

[19:35] Wait, Dan, why are you saying three?

[19:37] Sorry, I spaced out because there was a legal warning up at the top of Skype

[19:43] telling me that people need to know that they're being recorded.

[19:46] Yeah, yeah.

[19:48] Sorry, all right, let's do it again.

[19:50] One.

[19:51] Two.

[19:52] Three.

[19:53] Four.

[19:54] Five.

[19:55] Six.

Elliott Kalan

[19:56] Seven.

[19:58] Eight.

[19:59] Dan, okay, you know what, let's restart this recording.

Dan McCoy

[20:03] No.

[20:04] Yes, there's a minute of, okay.

Elliott Kalan

[20:06] No, no, no, no, no, no.

[20:08] Okay, one.

[20:09] Two.

[20:09] One.

[20:10] Say one again.

[20:12] One.

[20:13] Two.

[20:13] Three.

Dan McCoy

[20:15] Four.

[20:16] Five.

[20:17] Six.

[20:18] Seven.

[20:19] Eight.

[20:20] Nine.

[20:21] Jordan, I know this is just a mini, but please put that at the end.

[20:26] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[20:27] Dan's inability to remember how many people are on the call.

S4

[20:31] Maximumfun.org.

[20:33] Comedy and culture.

[20:34] Artist owned.

[20:36] Audience supported.

[20:37] Hi, I'm Dave Hill from before.

[20:41] And I'm very excited to bring Dave Hill's podcasting incident back to Maximum Fun, where

[20:46] it belongs.

[20:47] You can get brand new episodes every Friday on MaximumFun.org.

[20:52] Or, you know, wherever.

[20:54] And while my partner Chris Gersbeck and I might lack in specific subject matter on our podcast,

[21:00] we make up for in special effects.

[21:02] Chris, add something cool right here.

[21:05] Also, we have explosions.

[21:08] Animal noises.

[21:09] And sometimes even this.

[21:13] Dave Hill's podcasting incident.

[21:16] Every Friday on Maximum Fun.

[21:18] Chris, do another explosion right here.

FH Mini 4 - A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

Transcript

In this episode

Description