Ep.#458 - Snow White, with Rebecca Alter

[0:00] Hey, it's Dan these pre-rolls can get boring quickly, so I'll be fast flop TV is back this September

[0:07] 2025 through February

[0:09] 2026 with all new streaming live shows that you can also see video on demand if you can't make it live

[0:15] Individual tickets and season passes are available at the flop house dot simple tics.com

[0:21] That's ticks spelled T I X as well as all the info that is too much to say here now the show

[0:30] On this episode we discuss snow white snow white a beautiful achievement in the art of animation

[0:37] And then there is this movie

[0:40] Rare meow

[1:00] Hey

[1:05] Everyone and welcome to the flop house. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington

[1:09] I'm Elliot Kalin and who we joined by today Daniel

[1:13] We are joined by Rebecca alter who is a staff writer at vulture my favorite

[1:20] pop culture sites these days

[1:23] Hello, Rebecca

[1:25] There I like that qualified recommendation

[1:30] There's been great ones in the past the golden years of the AV Club and

[1:36] It was just like being careful in case fucking Columbo wandered in

[1:43] Actually, it says here you said that you like to dissolve the most

[1:47] Yeah, but these days yeah, I go to vulture first and foremost

[1:51] Well, I'll buy it I'll buy it thanks so much for joining us today now was uh, were you uh, were you

[1:58] Chomping at the bit to get at snow white. Is that why this is the episode that you're joining us for?

[2:03] actually, I think originally I

[2:07] Suggested unfrosted way back and then I fully got like laryngitis and could not speak and I think I left Dan a voice note being

[2:14] Like I can't talk. Yeah. Yeah

[2:17] You had watched unfrosted like three times in preparation

[2:24] Yeah, yeah, yeah, you thought you're coming on frosted minute where we talk we go through unfrosted a minute at a time

[2:29] Yeah, yeah. Wow. What a what a torturous existence. That would be

[2:33] This is like, oh, thank God. I I did appreciate that. You left a voice note

[2:40] To prove that you had laryngitis, but you weren't just like I don't know. I saw unfrosted

[2:46] I decided to pull the ripcord on this one

[2:48] See ya, you know, it was like no, I'm sick, you know

[2:53] Yeah, doctor said I had nodes

[2:55] No, no, no, the doctor said under no circumstances. Can you talk about unfrosted? It would be your condition

[3:03] Yeah, they were just hired by Jerry Seinfeld

[3:08] Big Seinfeld has a lot of tentacles in the American Medical

[3:12] A year after unfrosted was released. We kind of closed the door the bad the bad word of mouth on this one

[3:21] Well, yeah, we so we did a makeup we decided to watch Snow White and what are we doing this podcast in?

[3:29] Well, this is a podcast where we watch a bad

[3:33] Okay, there's at least a hundred great ones out there. Mm-hmm. We are not so much is clear

[3:38] And then we talk about it

[3:41] This was of course the latest in Disney's

[3:47] Hunger for shitting all over their

[3:50] Animated class. I was making mining of their legacy and and I thought that was too harsh, but you were

[3:57] Mm-hmm. I mean now was this was this one that you suggested Dan or Rebecca is this one that you were like

[4:03] I can't wait to watch this thing

[4:05] It's actually both Dan suggested it and I was sort of like I can't wait to watch this. Okay

[4:10] Thank you both then I guess

[4:14] I mean you you write a lot about theater and vulture among other things and this is this clearly

[4:21] Has a desire to like tap into like oh, there's a resurgent of love for musicals

[4:28] We're gonna combine the old songs that you loved from the original with some really terrible new

[4:34] When they're gonna pump up the old ones like they added they added beats to those old ones, yeah

[4:39] Yeah, well, it's Pasek and Paul who are the the mastermind songwriters behind such beloved things as dear Evan Hansen

[4:48] Okay

[4:53] As seen in a previous love house episode exciting

[4:56] Oh

[4:59] That one's gonna stay in the test of time now, did you guys

[5:02] So and the the screenplay or I guess it's a musical you could say the book of this really a Schrodinger's Comet you made

[5:11] The and the screenplay was written by Aaron Cresta Wilson who also wrote secretary and

[5:16] and

[5:18] Connections other movies along those lines and so I was whoa

[5:20] That was something I didn't realize till afterwards and I was like I assumed that they wanted to bring someone who could write a strong

[5:25] Female voice, but I really wish they had leaned into the secretary aspect a little bit in this version of the snow white

[5:32] You know, and it's about Gal Gadot

[5:34] secretarian

[5:37] There is a there I mean was I the only one added to Webster right secretarian somebody yeah

[5:42] Well, he's an urban Webster. It replaces secretariat, which is when you make someone be a racehorse for sexual reasons. Yeah. Yeah

[5:49] Mm-hmm. I mean there is a fucking saddle and secretary

[5:53] I

[5:54] Guess it all connects. It does the yarn. Well, I'm gonna be handling the plot today. So speaking of the yarn

[6:01] Let's spin a tale. So do you guys have a lot of experience? Like do you have like a good relationship with the original?

[6:10] Yeah, or the like Snow White and the Huntsman's

[6:14] There's like three of those

[6:17] Mirror mirror was yeah. Yeah, that was that was the kind of have any of them been like bangers

[6:23] I've any of them awesome. It's the original

[6:26] That first is no way. Yes, it's pretty good. Gorgeous. Gorgeous be like it has

[6:33] Elements that I understand why for this movie. They're like, okay. Well, let's update this or whatever

[6:39] Although in almost every case that they do it, I think they do it poorly

[6:44] so it's you're in a position or like I

[6:47] wish that I wish I was watching that retrograde great version of this story, but uh

[6:53] Yeah, otherwise, I don't know

[6:56] It's so sad because the original was the first feature-length

[7:00] Animated but I know technically that's not true. And like

[7:04] There were there was some like alternative styles of animation in the 20s or whatever

[7:08] But this is considered like the first it's the first feature-length Disney anyway, and that animation is like more sophisticated

[7:16] Then the animation in this movie which to be clear is like 95% still animation. It's just like yeah bad animation

[7:23] No offense to anybody who worked on I'm sure you all tried really hard guys

[7:29] I'm sure they're not offended now, but uh

[7:32] No, we were watching it and Audrey was like this is this is what it would look like if you just fed

[7:38] Yeah, the old Snow White into an AI and was like make a live-action looking version of it

[7:45] Well, that's that's the saddest version of the saddest aspect of it to me and we're jumping

[7:48] I feel like we're jumping ahead past the movie into Final Judgments in some ways

[7:50] but well

[7:51] is that the visual style of the original is so is so beautiful and unique for what it is and

[7:57] The visual style of this just feels like it's that same general heavily heavily CG

[8:02] everything's kind of oranges and browns and and a certain type of blue and

[8:07] weird rounded shadings and the lighting doesn't look like it exists in a real world, but instead in a sort of like

[8:15] Like fake simulated world it has that kind of a ice visual style feel to it

[8:20] Which is very strange to hear from Disney which at its best is is innovative and it's uncanny and soulless, etc

[8:27] Well, I think these live-action remakes are so spiritually similar to AI

[8:34] For me, even though they're not there's something about

[8:38] remake this thing

[8:41] Feed it through compute like it. There's something so anti creative like just the impulse to make these at all

[8:49] Yeah, they're just too bad

[8:51] This is what they have to do because the original idea minds went dry years ago

[8:57] The Earth's resources for original ideas

[8:59] I mean we they said that where he we were hitting peak original idea during the speck it screenplay boom of the 90s and

[9:05] They were right. It's been just going down ever since then and now we have to look for alternative sources such as remakes

[9:09] Yeah, it is weird because this is a movie where like the feet running theme is that there's this like bountiful world

[9:15] We live in and you can harvest it to a certain amount

[9:18] And you're talking about a situation where they have strip mined all the ideas completely

[9:22] Yeah, well, they were talking about how you can harvest the bountiful goodness of the Disney back catalog

[9:26] That's

[9:28] Speaking of this bountiful goodness that takes us right in there because that's the the first

[9:33] Unnecessary song of the film. I mean every song is unnecessary if you think about it, but so it's why not have them in

[9:39] But let's talk about the movie. Shall we I'll take you through a little movie called

[9:43] Snow White so we start with as always a hedgehog sleeping on a storybook and

[9:48] Some squirrels open up the storybook. This is clearly harkening back

[9:51] I got like they got like real animals to do this shit

[9:54] Got real animals that they trained and then they put makeup on them to make them look like CGI animals

[10:00] And so they're all wearing CGI prosthetics, little makeup, little mocap suits.

[10:03] Yeah. The mocap suits and mohair suits.

[10:06] And so these these squirrels open the book, clearly harkening back

[10:10] to the early Disney movies, which started with those storybook openings.

[10:13] And that storybook has a voiceover that tells

[10:16] about how there was a virtuous king and queen.

[10:18] No such thing, in my opinion, but a virtuous king, queen who won a child.

[10:21] They get a princess during a snowstorm.

[10:23] And the the implication is that it looks out the window and he's like,

[10:27] I think I have a name for this little thing.

[10:30] Yeah. The implication is that the princess kind of like

[10:32] that they found it in the snowstorm, not that it was born in a snowstorm.

[10:35] Because it's you know, they don't want to talk about like

[10:37] it was a hard labor in a carriage in a snowstorm.

[10:40] You know, there's so much placenta in that carriage right now.

[10:43] Oh, they had to.

[10:43] They just stripped out the lining and they had to refurbish

[10:45] the whole interior of the carriage. Yeah.

[10:47] You never get that smell out.

[10:48] And they named her Snow White because she was born in the snow.

[10:51] And they teach her about love and generosity.

[10:52] And they sing that song about it, about the bountiful goodness,

[10:55] if that grows in the earth.

[10:56] And they also look into a wishing well.

[10:58] And this song goes on for a long time.

[11:00] This is a song.

[11:01] There's a little choreo, though.

[11:03] You get some stuff to look at.

[11:04] There's a lot choreo.

[11:06] Yeah, it's very choreo.

[11:08] Clapping.

[11:09] And I feel like a lot of clapping and stomping at different points.

[11:13] And there's they are going for.

[11:15] Oh, hey, I feel like you can watch a Disney movie now and you know exactly

[11:18] what kind of song they're trying to get with each of their songs.

[11:21] And I think they're trying that the content is a little different.

[11:25] But they're trying for the feeling of the opening of Beauty and the Beast,

[11:27] where Belle is singing about being in that town.

[11:29] You see all the people in the town.

[11:31] And it's so amazing.

[11:31] It's such an amazing song.

[11:33] And it's such a good sequence.

[11:34] And they were 100% in the fucking world shows up, Gaston.

[11:38] And then we get a really cool song.

[11:40] Yeah, finally.

[11:41] That is absolutely what they're trying to do.

[11:43] But the thing about that song is it's not just a big opener.

[11:46] It is establishing things about the story.

[11:49] Whereas and the characters. Yeah.

[11:51] Yeah. This is like a completely extraneous extra.

[11:55] You could say it's a thematic song that it's trying to set the theme for the movie,

[11:58] but the movie doesn't play off that theme really at all.

[12:01] So it is very extraneous in some ways.

[12:03] But we also get to see that Snow White's

[12:06] a nice little girl who hands out pies and things to people.

[12:08] And because monarchy, it rationalized itself

[12:13] by providing a pittance to the people that it leeches off of, you know.

[12:16] But also this pie thing I realized later on is like, oh,

[12:20] the point of like the pie is some over here.

[12:24] I'm going to stick in my thumb and pull out some screenplay stuff.

[12:29] I just sticking your thumb in. I thought you were Jason Biggs for a moment.

[12:31] Oh, so how dare you, sir?

[12:36] Yeah. Hi, Chris.

[12:37] No, this I realized later on, like this is to like

[12:41] layer in like the thematic significance of the apple later.

[12:45] Yes. Yeah. And I'm like, we don't need the backstory

[12:48] for why an apple is what is being used, you know, to put her to sleep.

[12:53] Like that could just be an apple.

[12:55] Really? A strange, strange stance for backstory loving Dan McCoy to take.

[12:59] Yeah. Well, they don't think modern audiences would understand

[13:02] why a young woman would take a bite out of an apple

[13:05] unprompted when handed to her by a weird old crone.

[13:09] Instead, they're like, shouldn't it be like a bag of Takis or snickers?

[13:13] Or at least I would explain why it like turns into a skull.

[13:16] Sometimes it's like a lenticular bag of time.

[13:19] And that's how they make it glow blue.

[13:22] Yeah. So we flash forward.

[13:24] Snow White's mom dies.

[13:26] Has to. It's a Disney movie.

[13:27] Her dad marries a beautiful evil witch with a magic mirror.

[13:30] Everything about this.

[13:31] This woman screams evil all the time in a way that should like ideally would

[13:37] would again want they want it to sit in the classic Disney villain world

[13:41] where the villains are just kind of like outwardly villains

[13:43] that are super melodramatic.

[13:44] And let's face it, almost always coded as either gay or

[13:49] or like in some way melodramatically queer or something like that,

[13:52] or burlesque or something like that.

[13:53] And here you get there.

[13:56] The queen takes over the kingdom and sends the king off to war.

[13:59] And you're like, yeah, she's evil, right?

[14:01] Like everybody gets that she's super evil.

[14:03] And I guess the implication is just that she is like, this dad is so thirsty

[14:08] for this queen and that he's going to do whatever.

[14:10] And I wonder if I wonder maybe I'm the only one who's picking up.

[14:14] Dude, she's the fairest of the land.

[14:15] She's the this this like

[14:17] even a much higher, maybe it's that secretary writing in there,

[14:20] a much higher psychosexual dynamic running through subtext, running through this

[14:25] and like that her need to be the fairest in the land.

[14:28] It feels at a certain point to me, it becomes so much like

[14:31] that she wants Snow White so badly, you know, and it's a and it's

[14:34] it's not that she wants to be the most beautiful, most powerful,

[14:36] so much as like she needs to she needs to possess her in a way.

[14:38] And maybe I'm imagining that.

[14:39] I feel like I'm falling down on my job as perversoid number one,

[14:43] because like I did not pick up on any of that.

[14:46] Oh, well, then we I mean, I mean, I am pretty a little bit all at the same time.

[14:51] I mean, I mean, I just maybe it might just be because I've been writing

[14:54] the Harley Quinn book and they're literally the bad guy is like lusting over.

[14:57] She's lusting over Harley all the time.

[14:59] So maybe I'm just imagining

[15:00] the Harley Althea relationship in the queen and Snow White.

[15:03] That could be.

[15:04] I mean, ultimately, that's one of the things that I miss the most

[15:06] when they translate these animated movies to these digital slot movies

[15:12] is the like horniness that's injected by like lonely animators.

[15:18] Like you watch like Hunchback of Notre Dame and you're like,

[15:20] damn, these guys are fucking hard.

[15:22] Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, like because you got that whole song about how high

[15:26] it's going to be to lead the lead actresses.

[15:29] So we have like eight minutes of voiceover.

[15:31] It goes on for a long time, this voiceover to tell the story.

[15:34] But we finally leave the voiceover when Snow White, she's become a servant

[15:38] imprisoned in the castle by the queen.

[15:40] She is mopping up when a handsome thief will learn his name.

[15:43] Jonathan, no last name, shows up and steals some fruit from the kitchens.

[15:47] He briefly privileged shames Snow White and tells her to stop

[15:51] just thinking about helping others and start actually helping others.

[15:54] Y'all, what do you think about this guy?

[15:57] I don't like that.

[15:58] He has like a little like a little hoodie on under his jerkin.

[16:02] And I also don't like his like fuck boy behavior, dude.

[16:05] Like he's constantly shaming Snow White.

[16:08] And I'm like, but she's like in the running for fairest in the land.

[16:12] And she's a princess.

[16:13] And she's like the daughter of the dude you love.

[16:16] Well, also, well, when he sees her, she's literally mopping the floor.

[16:19] So it's not like she's doing something particularly princessy.

[16:22] You know, he does not know that she's the princess at this time.

[16:24] He thinks that she lives in the castle, but he does not know that she's like

[16:28] because she seems even weirder for him to shame her because if he thinks

[16:31] she's just a servant in the castle, it makes sense because then it's like

[16:34] it's his own insecurities later on when he finds out she is the princess.

[16:38] And he's like, oh, I liked you, but now you're the princess

[16:40] and you're out of off limits or whatever.

[16:42] OK, I get it. I like this care.

[16:47] Classic. I like this character in theory.

[16:50] Like they're basically just porting over Robin Hood and sticking him in as like

[16:55] the love interest rather than just a prince, you know.

[16:59] And like it gives at least something for this guy to care about.

[17:05] And it gives him a thing. Yeah.

[17:07] Yeah. And, you know, like in a movie that still buys

[17:12] into the idea of like benevolent rulers, like at least it

[17:16] gives some sense of like, I don't know, the underclass.

[17:20] But he is a boring guy.

[17:22] He's a boy. He's very handsome.

[17:24] He's got a great voice.

[17:25] But but I feel like the characters, but also the character

[17:27] keeps sliding back and forth between I do this for the king.

[17:30] Actually, I'm just a thief. I don't believe in anything.

[17:32] But I do love the king.

[17:34] No, I'm just a thief. I don't I don't have any ideals.

[17:36] Is he a theater guy? Is this actor a theater guy?

[17:38] Yes, he is. Yes, I believe so.

[17:40] What's the Andrew Burnap?

[17:41] That's Andrew Burnap. He's done a lot of Shakespeare.

[17:45] He got Tony Award for The Inheritance.

[17:48] Oh, yeah.

[17:50] We also glossed over the fact that we also get a backstory,

[17:54] which I'm sure we all needed, about why Snow White has a bob.

[17:58] Wait, really? I missed that part.

[18:00] Well, because in the original, she just sort of has a chic little bob

[18:05] modern hair haircut for the time.

[18:07] And in this, they have to be like, well, we need to explain.

[18:10] Well, what what's the explanation that the Gal Gadot

[18:14] cuts it off with a sword?

[18:16] As a show, as a show of dominance, she cuts Snow White's hair.

[18:21] You know, as a way of saying, you're mine now.

[18:23] I possess you with all the rights and privileges that entails.

[18:27] It's all in there.

[18:27] Turned into a horny animator.

[18:30] I guess it's weird when you're a horny live actioner.

[18:33] That's that's the troubling thing.

[18:35] So arguably, that's more than you're just any director.

[18:40] I guess that's true.

[18:41] You're every director that's ever worked in film. Yeah.

[18:44] So she asked the queen.

[18:45] She goes, I got to help the people. They're struggling.

[18:48] Queen, can I bake some apple pies for people?

[18:51] And the queen is like, no, the people need a hard leader who's made of steel.

[18:55] And she sentences the thief, Jonathan, to freeze to death

[18:58] by being tied to the front gate to the palace.

[19:01] So it's like, give him clemency.

[19:02] And Snow White sings a song about wanting to escape her fate.

[19:05] And is she going to be the girl that her dad said she could be or something?

[19:09] And she freezes before you before you freak out.

[19:11] These old fairy tales were full of fucked up shit.

[19:14] Why? Yes. Freeze.

[19:15] Freezing a thief is pretty normal.

[19:17] But this this song.

[19:20] Yeah, you're in a fairy tale.

[19:21] You freeze a couple thieves just by 9 a.m.

[19:23] Yeah, you get it.

[19:24] Then by noon, it's a lot of cutting kids' fingers off and pulling the eyes out of fishermen.

[19:29] Road is littered with frozen.

[19:31] There's just a guy walking around with a sausage stuck to the end of his nose.

[19:34] Kill me. Kill me, please. Yeah.

[19:36] This song essentially also replaces

[19:39] Someday My Prince Will Come. Yeah.

[19:41] And and I understand the desire to do this

[19:46] because they want to give the the female lead more agency

[19:50] and not be just like, I'm waiting around for some dude to like come.

[19:54] But I would argue that the song that they replaced with is not a good pick for.

[20:00] Because she's singing like waiting on a wish.

[20:03] And it's like, okay, so you're still waiting for some magical outside force to help you

[20:08] rather than you doing something.

[20:10] If that's the goal or the place of the song.

[20:11] But that's the lesson she's learning in the movie.

[20:13] She's the lesson she's learning in the movie.

[20:14] She can't just wait for a wish.

[20:15] You gotta make a wish happen.

[20:16] Yeah, I guess so.

[20:17] Like the movie Wish.

[20:18] I guess so.

[20:19] The Disney movie, Wish.

[20:21] Another great mining of just sort of the idea of Disney IP.

[20:27] Chris Pine does a voice on that one, right?

[20:28] It's so good where they're like, we're gonna celebrate 100 years of Disney.

[20:30] But just kind of making a thing that feels like other Disney stuff.

[20:33] But it's not, it doesn't reference it at all, you know?

[20:36] Yeah.

[20:37] Anyway, so I hate to interrupt you guys, but let's get back to the story.

[20:42] So she frees the thief and he runs off and he goes, you know, you can leave the castle

[20:46] with me.

[20:47] And she's like, nah, I'm not gonna.

[20:49] But the queen saw Snow White do this.

[20:51] And she asked her magic mirror, the magic mirror, which is the most CGI looking element

[20:56] in the whole thing.

[20:57] I don't mind that though.

[20:58] I don't mind it so much, but I wish that they like, I don't know, made it look cool.

[21:02] The magic mirror in the original movie looks so cool.

[21:04] Like it's such a spooky thing, you know?

[21:07] I agree with that.

[21:08] But I also feel like all of the stuff surrounding the mirror and the evil magic is the stuff

[21:13] that looks best in the movie because it is borrowing most directly from the way the original

[21:18] movie looked.

[21:19] So even though it's a pale copy, I'm just like, oh, well, this, you know, this looks

[21:23] cool.

[21:25] So she asked the mirror, who's the fairest of them all?

[21:26] And the mirror is like, not you.

[21:29] And she's like, what?

[21:30] And so, as in the story, she takes a huntsman, she spits out her drink all over the mirror.

[21:38] Who's the fairest of them all?

[21:39] Not you, my queen.

[21:40] Oh, OK, great.

[21:41] That's good.

[21:42] Whoa.

[21:43] It's all over the mirror.

[21:44] The mirror has a magic hand that comes out and wipes his face for you, deadpan.

[21:47] Yes, she has to clean the mirror with Windex and the mirror's like, oh, don't get it in

[21:53] my mirror eyes.

[21:55] Yeah.

[21:56] Yeah.

[21:57] The I would love all that.

[21:58] I mean, why is there never has there must have been like a big slapstick, goofy version

[22:01] of Snow White at some point, right?

[22:02] Well, there is a Betty Boop one that came out around the same time as the Disney one

[22:06] that was very slapstick.

[22:07] I bet it was pretty slapstick and I bet Cab Calloway was probably in it.

[22:11] Oh, you know, they had the rotoscope machine going on.

[22:15] Oh, yeah, for sure.

[22:16] That's the I remember as a kid seeing those cartoons and not only how they were made and

[22:20] just being loving them, but being so confused by how suddenly the animation suddenly became

[22:25] so smooth.

[22:26] And again, also how the cartoons would suddenly stop for Coco the Clown to become a jazz singer

[22:29] and just have and just sing a swing song and then go right back to the movie again to the

[22:34] story again.

[22:35] I'd be like, yeah, what is going on here?

[22:36] It gets so eerie.

[22:37] You're like the movement suddenly became so natural, even though his legs are getting

[22:42] so long and short.

[22:44] Yeah.

[22:45] Oh, man.

[22:46] Like a regular Pedro Pascal.

[22:47] So so she she orders the Huntsman take Snow White to the apple orchard.

[22:54] Then you're going to kill her and bring her heart back in a box, which is, I guess, where

[22:58] the where the I guess that's the inspiration for the Nirvana song Heart Shaped Box, right?

[23:01] Yeah, probably.

[23:02] Yeah.

[23:03] Can I pause here quickly to say that I brought you guys an offering?

[23:06] Oh, this better be a human heart.

[23:08] Oh, no.

[23:09] Amazing.

[23:10] Oh, what is it?

[23:11] It's a Disney promotional live action Snow White popcorn bucket.

[23:16] Oh, like the box from the movie that the heart is in.

[23:20] I will say, how much you can fit a fair amount of popcorn in a fair amount.

[23:25] Dan is already like, how do I have sex with this thing?

[23:28] Hold down, dude.

[23:32] Yeah.

[23:33] You may have seen Rebecca online doing some popcorn bucket reviews.

[23:38] She's on the.

[23:39] Oh, what's your fate?

[23:40] Journalism is really thriving, you guys.

[23:43] Well, I just got to play with the Galactus one, which is approximately 20 inches tall

[23:51] and two feet wide.

[23:52] And its eyes glow.

[23:54] I mean, that's a lot of popcorn right there.

[23:56] My arm goes all the way down it.

[23:58] Wow.

[23:59] Wow.

[24:00] So it's like it's close.

[24:01] You can get to a bottomless pit of popcorn.

[24:04] Pretty much.

[24:05] But yeah, this the Snow White box.

[24:08] It's a bit more humble.

[24:09] I kind of like the box shape.

[24:13] I feel like that would be, in some ways, a lot easier to eat out of.

[24:17] So it's kind of like a trough.

[24:19] Yeah.

[24:20] Anything that falls while you're trying to eat it just goes right back in the box.

[24:23] It's a virtuous cycle.

[24:27] You could fit like two hearts in there.

[24:30] Thank you.

[24:31] All future guests.

[24:32] Now, take note, bring offerings.

[24:37] So the Huntsman takes Snow White to pick apples, but he can't be able to kill her.

[24:41] She's just too nice and too fair.

[24:42] He tells her, run away.

[24:44] And she runs in the dark forest and she's pushing past trees and owls and bats are flying

[24:47] at her.

[24:48] And I kind of like this part.

[24:49] I mean, I love this sequence in the original movie.

[24:50] This is one of the places where I think the unreality or the uncanny valley reality of

[24:55] the AI type visual style works a little bit more because it feels so, you know, hallucinogenic.

[25:02] It feels so fantastic.

[25:03] It's a moment where they're like, hey, it's similar to some of the stuff with the mirror

[25:07] where they're like, hey, we are we can kind of do anything with this technology.

[25:13] Let's like play around with it instead of trying to desperately try and make it look

[25:17] real.

[25:18] Yeah.

[25:19] And this is this is when the movie most closely resembles Valerie's Week of Wonders.

[25:24] You know, the the Czech fantasy film.

[25:26] So I was like, oh, that's good.

[25:28] OK, of course.

[25:29] So she eventually she falls.

[25:30] I think they said they were intentionally referencing that.

[25:33] Oh, yeah, probably.

[25:34] Probably press material.

[25:35] So she falls through a pond.

[25:36] She befriends a ton of CGI woodland creatures.

[25:39] There's just like a shit ton of chipmunks and squirrels and deer and little birds and

[25:43] stuff.

[25:44] And she follows this deer to a cottage and rabbits lead her into the cottage.

[25:48] So if the police arrest her for breaking entering, she'd be like, the animals did it.

[25:51] It wasn't me.

[25:52] Yeah.

[25:53] And she falls asleep across some very short beds.

[25:57] Who could these beds belong to?

[25:58] I mean, their names written on the names are like carved into them.

[26:03] Yeah.

[26:04] This is when we enter enter the what would have been the titular Seven Dwarfs if this

[26:09] was still called Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was just called Snow White.

[26:12] And of course, they sing hi-ho, but it's like a supersized version of the hi-ho song.

[26:16] It's got so many more verses.

[26:17] They go to a mine.

[26:18] They're raised around in minecarts.

[26:20] Pitbull has a fucking burst, right?

[26:23] Yeah.

[26:25] It says hi-ho, Seven Dwarfs, Pitbull.

[26:28] It's about living in Miami.

[26:29] I don't know.

[26:30] You lost him in the mine.

[26:31] Yeah.

[26:32] I want to say about these songs, though, even the even the look, I don't like the new songs.

[26:38] I feel like an old man saying it like the ones that are funnier, I like better.

[26:43] To be a man in your 40s and to be like this song in a children's movie is not as good

[26:47] as the song of the older children's movie.

[26:49] I don't like these pop style show tunes.

[26:53] I want the old style.

[26:55] I don't.

[26:56] I just.

[26:57] Yeah.

[26:58] I'm not as fond of it.

[26:59] I mean, these are songwriters.

[27:00] I apologized to them, I guess, out in the world.

[27:03] I generally don't like that much.

[27:07] But even the older songs that I do like, I found the orchestrations of them really bad.

[27:14] Like there's something bad about it.

[27:16] Like the way it was mixed.

[27:17] I mean, I don't know any of that stuff.

[27:18] It just didn't sound OK.

[27:19] I thought there was a very prominent banjo in the mix that I was picking up on and enjoying.

[27:24] There's nothing wrong with that.

[27:25] There's nothing wrong with a prominent banjo.

[27:26] Well, I think that was during Hi-Ho.

[27:28] I remember the banjo and that was one of the few things I was like, oh, this is fun.

[27:31] This feels right for these dwarf characters.

[27:34] I'll say Hi-Ho, I felt like was one of the more successful song re-dos in this, if only

[27:38] because like it's still fun.

[27:40] The energy is up the whole time.

[27:41] It goes on for a long time, but like and they're using it to introduce the different characters

[27:45] personalities because otherwise it would be impossible to tell what Grumpy is like

[27:49] or Sleepy or Sneezy.

[27:51] It's a way of knowing what they're like.

[27:53] I mean, sure, there's their names, but...

[27:56] Unlike in Silly Song, they didn't add like a little crude like extra verse in there.

[28:01] I was like, Ellie's going to hate this.

[28:03] You didn't clock that.

[28:04] They had like some sort of off color joke right in the middle of the revamped.

[28:09] You know, ding dong, it's the Ellie song.

[28:11] Oh, I don't remember that part.

[28:13] You know, I was also, I was taking notes and doing the dishes while watching this.

[28:16] So I didn't, maybe not have picked up all the nuances.

[28:18] So, but I did notice they race around in mine carts, like it's Donkey Kong Country.

[28:22] Love that.

[28:23] Love a mine cart race.

[28:24] Can't kick it enough of those.

[28:25] And I will say this about the dwarfs.

[28:27] They look scary.

[28:28] Did you guys feel this way?

[28:30] Like, I feel like they, their design is very off-putting and very like, very, um, just

[28:36] I imagine a child being scared by them.

[28:39] They're abominations.

[28:41] It's truly one of the worst looking things I've ever seen.

[28:44] And it's not bad.

[28:45] Like it's lazy because it's a very specific character design that I've never seen

[28:51] anything quite like this before.

[28:53] And I found them really repulsive.

[28:55] Like even their skin was full of these, these big pores, but it, and it looked

[29:01] waxy and their faces were, it was horrible.

[29:04] They look like lawn gnomes, like come to life in like, in a hyper-realistic way.

[29:12] Like, I mean, it looks like there's AI.

[29:15] YouTube is always trying to tell me that I want to watch what would cartoon characters

[29:19] look like if they were real, you know, that people use AI for.

[29:22] And it looks like it does look like that.

[29:24] It looks like you took a lawn gnome and you said, Hey, I make this real.

[29:27] And it, and it kind of gave you one of those.

[29:29] And it's, yeah, there's like, there's like a hyper detail to it, but their

[29:32] faces are all kind of stretched.

[29:34] And I wonder if there was also the desire to not make them look too much

[29:39] like real human beings, because then it becomes a matter of, are we othering?

[29:44] You know, there was a whole thing like Peter Dinklage in particular was like,

[29:48] you should not use little people for this because like, you're like turning

[29:53] them into some sort of other creature, you know, and that's a bad idea.

[29:59] So they.

[30:00] We're originally I think going to and then they swung far in the other direction like okay, like let's make these

[30:05] exaggerated CGI gnome-like

[30:08] There's a way to make a little gnome old man little gnome man

[30:13] Cute like yeah, look at fucking hoggle, baby

[30:18] Yeah, or David the no, thank you

[30:22] David the gnome is incredibly give them little rosy cheeks and make them very cute. I was saying hoggle from labyrinth, you know

[30:28] Oh, right, right. I share the same that David the gnome

[30:31] I think the only thing you're up against is that it's maybe the most boring cartoon in the history of television

[30:39] I remember as a kid watching Nickelodeon and David the gnome would want to be like well

[30:42] I have to watch this because it's television, but I'm not gonna enjoy it at all

[30:45] Yeah, you cross your arms. Yeah

[30:48] Rebecca it looks like she's receding into herself. How dare you?

[30:53] I've never seen one second of David the gnome

[30:58] I

[31:06] Will say it's one of those shows that if my kids watched it I'd be like, this is great. It's gentle like it's not

[31:12] It's not loud. It's not frantic. But as a kid, I was like, let's amp it up. Come on

[31:16] Get a shot of energy into this

[31:19] so, uh, there's

[31:23] You know now that David the gnomes in the public domain he can finally be a killer

[31:27] So the the dwarfs also they have we meet their personalities

[31:33] They have magic hands that glow when they locate precious gemstones. That's the thing that never really does anything

[31:39] It's just it's just a thing they do for a moment

[31:42] They go home from a day of mining just a day of tearing the bounty of Mother Earth out of her guts

[31:48] To replace it with empty hollow tunnels and and a fractured sub. I mean just honestly those tunnels are pretty spacious

[31:55] Like from what I know about mining they have a pretty good day

[31:59] They do and to be honest, and they're just doing that with pickaxes

[32:02] So, I mean they talk about how they've been working together for centuries

[32:04] It takes a long time to dig a tunnel that is

[32:07] Roughly the size of the interior of the Metropolitan Museum of Art with a pickaxe like that's amazing that they did that and there

[32:13] And they're also probably union members like that. We never we never see them take a vote on anything

[32:18] We never see them talk to their reps. I'm not sure

[32:21] What are they doing with all those jewels because that seems to be a rich

[32:25] Cache of emeralds and rubies and such and they don't seem to be wealthy

[32:30] They're all living together as roommates in a little

[32:34] So the subtext is I think that it's not so much that they want the jewels and they want to be rich so much as

[32:39] They want to keep other people from accumulating things because it would make them feel lesser if other people had more

[32:45] So they just they just hoard all those gems and don't let anyone else have it

[32:49] They're very selfish very selfish characters, but that's the world. We live in Snow White anyway

[32:56] Yeah, originally when they're naming them they're like well their primary characteristic is selfish, but that's all of them

[33:01] So we need to differentiate. It can't be just greedy one greedy to

[33:06] so

[33:07] They get to the they get to the house. They find Snow White sleeping. They run around scared

[33:12] Oh, no, and they accidentally leave dopey alone in the room with her

[33:15] He's the he's the dwarf who cannot talk who in this version looks a lot like Alfred E

[33:19] Newman which I

[33:21] He looks like a combination of like horrible ugly CGI no man and

[33:31] Tom Holland

[33:35] Yeah, I can see them together yeah, and is he he's not bald in this version right that he has here

[33:40] No, he's got a full head of brown sort of Tom Holland color hair

[33:44] Yeah, but it's I do find him. I found him the most unsettling

[33:50] Yeah, he has the most like human-like features the others have slightly more exactly making like quote-unquote cute expressions

[33:57] But that's very like repulsive with the aforementioned issues with like how their skin looks up close

[34:02] Well, there's also there's a there's always a problem with a character that really wants you to love it

[34:06] And and it's not quite connecting whereas the the dopey in the original one

[34:11] He does he's always tripping over things and like you know he's got those long sleeves and everything you know you can't help but love him

[34:17] He's a bald he's like a he's like a bald little gnome

[34:20] how could you not like him you know the conception of this dopey part of the problem is like and this is gonna sound like

[34:25] An anti-woke screen which is obviously

[34:31] Despite what

[34:33] Stuart Elliot try and say is not my vibe, but like I think that they're the idea is like oh

[34:40] We can't make dopey dopey that would feel

[34:44] Wrong now, but like the original dopey is just like a lovable Harpo style

[34:48] Goof like why I always assumed he was called dope because he was a heroin addict

[34:52] Right right right this was pushing like so far into like like this is like

[34:56] I don't know the Holy Fool sort of thing

[34:59] But it is trying so hard to like tug at your heartstrings that it's it's the only

[35:05] The title for baby's day out. Yeah, I think it was yeah guys. Which is your favorite door if I think you can guess

[35:13] Oh, yeah, sure well my favorite is dwarf from dwarf goes fishing in your place. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's cool. Mine's Gimli

[35:22] Among these doors

[35:24] Okay now I have to rethink. I don't know probably there's a doctor one, right?

[35:32] Clarifies in this that he's not really a doctor, but he has forceps yeah, yeah, I mean again

[35:38] There's a lot again. That's the secretary stuff coming in yeah

[35:40] Yeah, I like I the closest I come to liking one of these is grumpy because I think

[35:45] Grumpy I don't like he doesn't he's less horrific

[35:50] Even in the original grumpy grumpy and dopey are clearly the two that you're meant to like invest

[35:54] Yeah, I can't you don't because he's super cute and

[35:57] Grumpy because he's the one who has a change of heart

[36:00] You know he's the one who doesn't like Snow White and then by the end is is crushed that she's been hurt

[36:05] So it's the well it was the others are just kind of around like bashful who gives a shit. You know what?

[36:11] Pipe up dude

[36:13] And there's the one who was it happy who was always hungry like there's no there's none of them

[36:18] I'm hungry, but the what he was like at the end

[36:20] I think it's him who gets some food, and he's like mmm. Yeah, like he's always talking about food

[36:27] So anyway, there's there's like a sleepy one right there sleepy

[36:33] Yeah

[36:41] So so she gets left behind with dopey, but she's gentle to him and they guess oh she's on the run

[36:46] She's in trouble, but against grumpy's wishes. They agree to hide her at the house meanwhile the Queen's mirror is like

[36:52] Oh, dude, Snow White still alive dude, and the Queen sings her bad guy song every bad guy gets a song in Disney movies

[36:59] How did you guys feel about this bad guy song which is usually my favorite song in a Disney?

[37:03] Like the aforementioned hunchback. Yeah, I mean hellfires the best song Notre Dame. I love porn

[37:09] I mean, there's a number of great songs in Little Mermaid

[37:11] I love poor unfortunate souls like there's yes you get great songs from from Disney

[37:15] I mean that scars song in the original Lion King. I love it. You know be prepared

[37:20] There's a split decision for me on here

[37:22] This is one of the newer songs that as a song didn't bother me as much

[37:27] I'd like thought the song was okay, but I Gal Gadot is not really much of a singer so

[37:33] That was the problem

[37:34] This was the highlight of the movie for me because I do think it's where Gal Gadot's

[37:39] Limitations as a performer are thrown into the starkest relief and the whole time the whole movie

[37:46] She's making like a smirk. She's playing with her long nails, and she really thinks

[37:51] She's eating

[37:55] She's

[37:56] Doing that good of a job

[37:59] And she's simply like it's it's horrible. Yeah, and that's very fun and and delightful

[38:07] This is the high point from a schadenfreude point of view it just it will be an

[38:12] Entertainment point of view and and it's so cruel to her because it's making her this song especially the lyrics

[38:18] It's it's asking of her to say so many things so fast

[38:22] and actually sing so many things so fast and she's and

[38:26] And

[38:27] Did she do her own?

[38:29] They don't they don't have a stunt voice. Do they sounds like it. I would assume it would have gotten a better stunt voice

[38:34] Yeah, so I would imagine that part of her taking this role is that she's like I want to I want to sing

[38:41] I want to I want to show off my pipes and it's a song about

[38:46] What's it called again? It's it's something about she says

[38:49] Ambitious girls must be vicious girls at some point. It's the songs like I'm evil. Yeah. Yeah

[38:56] The song is highlighting

[38:58] Why they're evil or how they're evil or how being evil is awesome. Yeah, this is called all is fair

[39:03] It's basically business saying like it's great to be evil when you're beautiful. You can get away with whatever you want

[39:08] You know that that's the most important. That's what I always say

[39:12] That's why Stuart started weightlifting. He was like, wait a minute. Hold on

[39:20] Beauty is power the power to take the world and make it your plaything, you know, yeah

[39:25] So she gets this whole big song. She sends her soldiers out to to find Snow White and this is when we get into the

[39:31] Dwarf antics part of the story where they're just knocking things over. They're fighting among themselves

[39:37] and Dopey gets upset by all this rambunctiousness and Snow White talks to him gently and

[39:43] She kind of silently admits he's afraid to speak and she teaches him how to whistle instead

[39:48] And she helps the dwarfs get along and they all clean the house

[39:50] Annoying

[39:54] This is their whistle while you work

[39:57] It is weird that for so many of these live action

[40:00] remakes a big thing about them has been like oh we need to rehabilitate these female characters

[40:04] to make them better role models all of these girls are suddenly going to be really good the

[40:07] princesses all do stem now they're all independent and this one is still very much mostly about

[40:14] baking pies and housework yeah it's they i think they're trying to do a hard thing of making her

[40:20] kind of a more politically aware character without losing the kind of disney princess

[40:27] innocence and i feel like there's a they're missing an opportunity to play into a different

[40:33] kind of a different kind but a more retrograde sort of female heroism that's more the traditional

[40:38] thing of the female character who is not like tough but instead wins people over through

[40:46] love and inherent goodness and that's what they're trying to do with her but they also

[40:49] want to make her like a character who is projecting kind of strength and defiance

[40:54] and i feel like there's a little bit of tension between those two things that she could her

[40:57] strength is in her i guess in this in the old-fashioned version of the story her strength

[41:01] is in purely her goodness it's a very kind of like christian morality christian paranormal

[41:06] type of strength but here they also want to make her like a political rebel and it's hard to it's

[41:09] hard to do those things you know at the same time uh i just realized that before i was wrong it was

[41:14] not during silly song that they had the off color new uh lyric it was in this song it was i looked

[41:20] it up it was wait i think that brush is mine you should have hung a sign if you don't hush i'll

[41:26] take this brush and shove it shove it where that's on don't shine i'm like we don't we don't need

[41:30] that i thought you were gonna say like uh i thought you're gonna say the lines were whistle

[41:34] while you work while you need and clean and tuck you know that you can also whistle while you hey

[41:38] what's that over there i thought that was the lyric you're talking about it was fine it was

[41:42] fine that's i feel like as far as putting off-color things into disney injecting disney movies that's

[41:48] what you just said dan is one of the lesser ones but i still don't like it sure but it's also

[41:51] what it's implying unnecessary it's so much so much i feel yeah that's true but i feel like the i

[41:56] was more uh more worried by uh in the lion king when in the original version of hakuna matata

[42:02] they don't let him say farted but then in the new version of it he goes what i was gonna say farted

[42:06] fart right i can't say farted and it was like there's no joke if you do it that way like the

[42:10] joke doesn't even exist you know um uh do you gauge your children's reactions because i know

[42:17] you're you're two boys to which to this movie or to that version of the lion king to that version

[42:21] of the lion king do they like the farted they found it i mean they were so kind of bored by

[42:25] my i mean my younger son just loves watching animal stuff he was kind of into it but we uh

[42:30] but they were mostly kind of bored and we went to see mufasa you should have just shown him like

[42:34] microcosmos or something i mean he loves microcosmos yeah well we've done and you and

[42:38] you play the flaming lips record at the same time yeah not usually but when we went to see it we

[42:43] went to see uh mufasa in the theaters when that came out because we were out of town and i need

[42:47] to take the boys do something and that was one where they were both they had both lost interest

[42:50] i think 25 minutes into the movie you know but i made them stay before when you said you're like

[42:55] that's that's mufasa he's gonna die in another movie i was like i was like this is interesting

[43:02] they're retconning away the idea that scar is clearly queer like they're really working hard

[43:07] to make him a to make him a heterosexual character you know um so uh and also but i

[43:13] think they all enjoyed that uh mads mickelson got to have a song where he went bye bye a bunch of

[43:17] times so um so anyway because it was mad mads mickelson they understood yeah yeah they were

[43:23] like they were like it's great that he's doing it the star of the pusher movies yeah uh so uh snow

[43:31] white goes off to find uh the rebel thieves that jonathan leads in the woods to see if her dad is

[43:35] still alive because they they say that he says he works for the king or he's fighting for the king

[43:39] or whatever and she finds jonathan he's a cynic he sings uh the princess problems song about uh how

[43:45] uh she's entitled i guess i she literally has been almost murdered and and with and with had

[43:50] to run away from home but he's still pretty he's real snarky to her about it you know

[43:56] where they they like you know they play off each other right yeah it's a two-hander yeah yeah again

[44:02] the more comic people so it's really more of a four-hander four-hander yeah yeah well yeah

[44:08] no that adds up the math works uh he's gently nagging her uh she's starting to get interested

[44:17] in him and in the communist cause yeah so it's moving along in the in the in the uh it's it's

[44:24] very uh love island the way they're interacting right that he's just being like you stink and

[44:28] she's like i love this guy now this is this is who i have to be with um no it's i think it's

[44:33] it's supposed to be the old uh they don't get along but we know they're gonna fall in love

[44:38] later or something like that but they talk to each other the castle guards show up and then

[44:42] jonathan and his brigands gang fight them and snow white they're more like merry men than brigands

[44:48] really they're like kind of goofy like really steal from anybody although they do have the

[44:52] classic cart full of valuables uh that that robin hood does merry man always have uh and snow

[44:59] white i was confused by this so snow white oh she's played by rachel ziegler oh now i understand

[45:06] because i was like how'd west side story get into this movie you know yeah yeah so so i mean

[45:12] so she went back in time from the 1950s to fairy tale time location

[45:16] yeah and it's every location hours time machines can change location are you saying this is also

[45:22] what the west side of manhattan was like before lincoln center it was just forests castles yeah

[45:27] that's right yes mines just gem mines everywhere uh she runs off and then she tricks the soldiers

[45:33] into chasing her dress which actually has birds in it and then we cut to her on a on a riding away

[45:40] on a horse or something and she's still wearing her dress so it's like did she have two dresses

[45:44] that's what confused me or did they did they did they show like in their their like wheelbarrow full

[45:51] of stuff did the brigands have like spare costumes and crap maybe maybe that's it yeah i don't know

[45:58] because i was like what do you guys think of the the live action snow white dress because there's

[46:03] something about the like crinoline skirt doesn't it looks very cheap to me it looks totally party

[46:10] city it's very goofy doofy most of these movies try to you know interpolate the vibe of the

[46:17] original dress um and this just did a direct one-to-one which looks very it's an issue i have

[46:23] actually to be honest with a lot of the marvel movie costumes where especially the asgardian

[46:28] costumes so that where it should look like it's made out of leather or metal but they all just

[46:31] kind of look like they're made out of plastic you know and this feels kind of similar like it does

[46:35] feel it does it does feel kind of off the rack although i like the colors in it the colors are

[46:39] bright and bold you know yeah i like the colors i think that it's all like such like shiny satiny

[46:44] stuff that that's what's giving it that like i don't know like we got some like plasticky fabric

[46:51] from yeah that's i mean it's the same that's the issue i really had more with the queen's head

[46:54] dress i love it i love a big spiky headdress i love galactus i love hella i love um uh

[47:00] maleficent's headdress but hers like it looked like again it looked like it was kind of plasticky

[47:06] like it looked like it was just made out of not a not a material this is me being a being the

[47:10] stupidest version of nerd it doesn't look like the kind of material that the real queen of this fairy

[47:15] kingdom would have at the time yeah it looks like what you wear under a mesquite helmet maybe to

[47:22] protect your ears from the windchill uh and it just the dress stands out extra because they dulled

[47:28] the colors of all the dwarves clothing and also as you mentioned earlier all of these um the brigands

[47:34] are all looking like out of a disney channel original movie they're wearing like flannel and

[47:39] hoodies yeah yeah they're like yeah they look they're like uh they're like a like very church

[47:44] camp like hey we're bad boys but we're also cool you know like we're cool but we're also like uh

[47:49] wholesome i guess yeah they're fighting for the king the one true king yeah exactly yeah

[47:55] i have some pretty cool rock music you should hear all about his return it's about jesus but

[48:01] you you'd never know dan were you ever in a production of god's bell uh no but i do know

[48:07] all the songs yeah but do you know how to spell god but i could be yeah any directors

[48:15] you got a good uh baritone for prepare you the way of the lord yeah come on i have to admit god's

[48:19] bell is a musical i don't know any of the songs too i've never seen it not familiar with it all

[48:24] and this is because someone who's going tonight the night we're recording this to the hollywood

[48:27] bowl to see jesus christ superstar for probably the fourth time that i've seen it in some form or

[48:31] another so uh i'm up for a christian based musical it's good it's good music it's stephen

[48:36] schwartz it's uh it's good stuff check it out okay that's what i'll do i'll check it out right

[48:40] after this that's dan's recommendation at your local library go to your local library say give

[48:47] me god's spell they'll say hold on hold on i'm on the phone here do you want the soundtrack do you

[48:55] want the movie do you what there is a patter song in it that i do think you specifically would

[49:01] love that oh okay i'll have to try it out i'll listen to it at some point do you guys have a

[49:04] preferred version of it like uh if if listeners want to check out god's the toronto cast it had

[49:11] every legendary production yeah that's that's that's my main touch point for godsville is that

[49:17] hearing about that toronto production where it was like uh where's every famous person from

[49:21] canada was in it it was like martin short and eugene levy and you know um rob ford yeah mayor

[49:27] rob ford yeah yeah pierre trudeau justin trudeau wayne gretzky yeah yeah robert davies yeah

[49:33] everybody was yeah he was so good on saturday night so uh anyway snow white has impressed

[49:40] the bandits impressed jonathan by how she tricked the soldiers and he admits you know it's nice i

[49:45] actually do have ideals i do want the king to come back uh and that's when he gets hit by a crossbow

[49:49] that i guess was meant yeah he throws himself in front of it so he doesn't get shot with a

[49:54] crossbow uh the soldiers i guess i guess they escape because they are the snow it takes him to

[50:00] This is when Doc points out he actually has, I guess, a Ph.D. in mineralogy.

[50:04] He doesn't.

[50:05] Doc is really more of an honorary title.

[50:07] He's not a medical doctor.

[50:08] There's a post-graduate school in...

[50:10] I have to assume.

[50:12] I mean, with the idea of Doc being someone other than a medical doctor, where is he getting

[50:16] that idea from?

[50:17] You know?

[50:18] Yeah, maybe he was born on the docks.

[50:19] That's what it is.

[50:20] Yeah, yeah.

[50:21] No, actually, I'm called Doc because I always wear Dockers.

[50:24] So you're Doc Martin.

[50:28] I always wear Doc Martins and I have a Doccent.

[50:31] Oh, so every other way you could be Doc except being a doctor.

[50:34] You got that right.

[50:35] That's for sure.

[50:38] I also will talk about Dockadiles, which is like a crocodile, but it is a doctor.

[50:45] What the fuck?

[50:46] Really?

[50:47] It seems like that's not a real thing.

[50:48] You're just adding stuff to...

[50:49] Oh, yeah, of course.

[50:50] We'll do that, too.

[50:51] Whoa!

[50:52] Once you get into branding, you just kind of have to push it as far as you can go.

[50:55] Here's my app.

[50:57] I'm a tick doc.

[50:58] Wait a sec.

[50:59] Do you have an app?

[51:00] Apps exist in this world?

[51:01] Just this one.

[51:02] I'm an appetizer.

[51:03] Appetizer you eat before the meal.

[51:04] People mostly download and think it gets doctors advised about if you have a tick on you.

[51:09] That's not what it is, though.

[51:10] That's not it at all.

[51:11] Are there people trying to download dick talk?

[51:13] Oh, no.

[51:14] Yeah, we get a lot of people...

[51:15] Sounds like you have a lot of complaints.

[51:17] I'll add them to the Docket.

[51:20] Now I'll take my Docket ship to the moon.

[51:23] That's not a thing.

[51:24] These are not things, Doc.

[51:25] And then...

[51:26] Doc is short for Doc Man.

[51:27] Well, he's the leader.

[51:28] Maybe he's docking their pay.

[51:29] Yeah.

[51:30] And that's when Dopey reveals he can't talk.

[51:31] And he goes, Snow White, we just humor him.

[51:32] It's what we do.

[51:33] He actually gets very violent when we don't play into his doctor fantasy.

[51:34] So she gives a speech that unites the brigands and the dwarves together.

[51:35] They, of course, throw a dance party.

[51:36] And during the dance, there's a big musical number where Snow White starts falling in

[51:37] love with Jonathan and Jonathan's falling in love with Snow White.

[51:38] They're saying, maybe we don't have to be alone.

[51:39] Maybe we can walk this path together.

[51:40] Maybe we don't have to be alone.

[51:42] Maybe we can walk this path together.

[52:14] There's no one else in this movie.

[52:15] I guess...

[52:16] I guess we got a date.

[52:18] Isn't there, like, a love connection between a couple of the brigands, too?

[52:19] Yeah, two of the brigands.

[52:20] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[52:21] One has a crush.

[52:22] Quag, the master of the crossbow.

[52:23] This character, Quag, the master of the crossbow, who we...

[52:24] He never seems to have a crossbow...

[52:25] I love that they set that up.

[52:26] They set that shit up and it pays off.

[52:27] It's such Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 type shit, where it's like, here's a character

[52:28] that no one cares about their arc.

[52:29] And now they get to pay it off at the end when he actually gets a crossbow.

[52:30] But he's involved with one of the other brigands, right?

[52:31] Yeah, I think.

[52:45] And...

[52:46] But, yeah, Jonathan is like, who am I going to date?

[52:48] A CGI squirrel?

[52:49] Sure, Snow White.

[52:50] We're in love now.

[52:51] Okay.

[52:52] So their kiss is first interrupted by everyone looking at them, but then interrupted by the

[52:56] soldiers showing up.

[52:57] And Snow White gives Jonathan her locket, saying, go find the king and show him this.

[53:02] Or it's a necklace or something.

[53:03] Go find the king and give him this.

[53:04] He'll understand.

[53:05] The bandits run off and distract the soldiers.

[53:07] Jonathan gets captured and he gets brought to the queen, who recognizes that necklace.

[53:11] And now she's going to use it in a plan to finally do what the huntsman didn't and kill

[53:16] Snow White.

[53:17] How is she going to do it?

[53:18] First, she mixes up a potion that makes her an old crone, and then she makes a poison

[53:22] apple.

[53:23] We got an old song here, right?

[53:24] We got an old song or something.

[53:25] This is a reprise of the All's Fair song, a new version of it.

[53:28] Why she doesn't make the poison apple and then become an old crone, I find very funny

[53:33] because it seems like she's probably more comfortable in her own physically fit body

[53:36] than as an old hunched crone.

[53:38] But she decided to save that, the hard work, for after she's in her crone form.

[53:44] She makes this poison apple.

[53:45] She locks Jonathan in the dungeon with the huntsman.

[53:47] And she goes off to find Snow White.

[53:50] Snow White is about to embark on a quest to find her dad.

[53:52] She of course waits until after making the dwarf's breakfast.

[53:56] She sees them off to work before she leaves, which is an interesting, which I think is

[53:59] such a funny touch.

[54:00] It's like, I have to find my father.

[54:02] Nothing else is more important than that.

[54:03] But let me make sure you have all your shit so you can go mine together.

[54:07] Do you have your pickaxe?

[54:08] Tie your shoes.

[54:09] Okay, now I'm going to go.

[54:10] The evil queen shows up with that necklace and says, oh, Jonathan gave this to me or

[54:14] something.

[54:15] I have a message.

[54:16] I support the king too.

[54:17] I remember so well.

[54:18] You think Gal Gadot was like, I'm giving substance vibes here.

[54:21] Yeah, she's waiting on that Oscar nod.

[54:24] This is when I'm finally going to get my Oscar.

[54:26] Finally.

[54:27] Her career has been, I mean, she's been in major movies for like 10 years now or something

[54:30] like that.

[54:32] But the, but yeah, she was like, this is my moment when I play this, when I play this

[54:37] dual characters part.

[54:39] So she says, hey, you used to hand out apple pies and I want to help you.

[54:44] So here's an apple.

[54:45] It'll really help me feel like I'm helping you.

[54:47] And so Snow White, it's one of those moments where she's like such a nice person that she's

[54:50] going to make this lady feel better by taking a bite out of her apple.

[54:55] Cool.

[54:56] Yeah.

[54:57] This apple will help.

[54:58] Oh, great.

[54:59] This one is like smoking.

[55:00] Oh, right.

[55:01] With a skull on it.

[55:02] A red delicious.

[55:03] Huh?

[55:04] The best, least mealy apple.

[55:08] And so.

[55:09] Delicious.

[55:10] Jonathan.

[55:11] So the woodland creatures go warn the dwarves.

[55:14] I don't know why the birds don't just swoop down and knock that apple out of Snow White's

[55:17] hand.

[55:18] Instead, they go to the mine and warn the dwarves so the dwarves can try to race back

[55:22] in time.

[55:23] But they're too late.

[55:24] Snow White has bit the apple.

[55:25] She falls into a coma just as the queen reveals, hey, it's me, the queen.

[55:28] And I killed your dad.

[55:29] See you.

[55:30] And that's the end, even though she knows that your body here for everyone to find.

[55:36] Even though she knows that the spell can be broken by true love's kiss and she knows that

[55:41] Snow White has a true love.

[55:42] The queen does not want to take Snow White's body and like throw it on a funeral pyre or

[55:46] something like that.

[55:47] Instead, she just leaves it in the woods for people to take care of.

[55:50] Yeah.

[55:51] But then the goof section.

[55:52] Well, I mean, it's classic.

[55:56] I mean, it's classic Bond villains.

[55:58] Why does Jason Voorhees kill each person individually and not just explode the entire Crystal Lake

[56:03] with an atom bomb?

[56:04] Here's what I'll say.

[56:05] Why?

[56:06] This is not that kind of criticism.

[56:07] One, Jason Voorhees is a mindless killing machine with no plan other than to murder.

[56:11] The queen is like my political survival rests on getting the only thing that matters to

[56:17] me, which is being the fairest of them all.

[56:19] Emotional health.

[56:20] Emotional health.

[56:21] Exactly.

[56:22] My emotional health, which is tied up in my body image.

[56:23] This is not a healthy way to maintain my emotional health.

[56:25] But I'm an evil queen.

[56:27] I have these issues.

[56:28] I'm working on them with my therapist, who is a magic mirror who tells me all the time

[56:31] that I'm not good enough.

[56:32] So maybe I need a new therapist instead.

[56:35] This is the most important thing to her.

[56:36] Instead of finishing the job, she's just like, I got to go.

[56:39] Goodbye.

[56:40] It's also, I guess, the irony that is, I guess, a subtext that we're just supposed to pick

[56:43] up.

[56:44] And if it is, then maybe it's that in order to achieve her goal of being the most beautiful

[56:47] of all, she has to commit ugly deeds which physically make her no more, no longer beautiful.

[56:52] You know, she just like really needs like a group of gals.

[56:56] You know, where they can like talk shit and pick each other up.

[56:59] It should be her, Maleficent, Ursula and who's another evil Disney gal and Cruella de Vil.

[57:07] They should get together.

[57:08] They should hang out and they should just support each other.

[57:11] That should be called the real evil wives of the Disney universe.

[57:14] Are they not doing that?

[57:15] Why is Disney not doing this already?

[57:16] Yeah, I feel like you could sell this to Disney Plus right now.

[57:20] I should be selling this to Disney Plus right now.

[57:21] You guys should be.

[57:22] We should let Disney Plus, if you're listening.

[57:25] Yeah, this is the way.

[57:26] This is the only way you can do it, though, which I've heard that you can't outside pitch

[57:30] to Disney.

[57:31] You have to be invited to pitch to Disney and you have to be invited to the vault.

[57:35] So I heard about this from somebody.

[57:37] You're invited into the vault.

[57:39] Walt's head is there plugged into all these machines and you've got it.

[57:42] You've got it.

[57:43] You've got to pitch the head on it first.

[57:45] Ironically, he's not the final decision maker.

[57:47] He's the first barrier you've got to get through.

[57:50] And to get back out of the vault, you have to push Winnie the Pooh through the vault

[57:54] door where he's gotten stuck because he ate too much honey.

[57:57] Yeah, exactly.

[57:58] Exactly.

[57:59] And swim through Scrooge's coins.

[58:00] Oh.

[58:01] Oh.

[58:02] It's a dream.

[58:03] Is that the dream, Dan?

[58:04] I feel like it'd be really uncomfortable.

[58:05] Well, in the universe where you can do it like Scrooge.

[58:06] Then you have to dance with a hologram of Michael Eisner.

[58:07] Beat him in a hit by the dance contest.

[58:08] Dance off?

[58:09] Yeah.

[58:10] Wow.

[58:11] So the mirror tells the queen, well, you're the fairest again.

[58:12] You did it.

[58:13] And the queen is like, yes.

[58:14] Flawless victory.

[58:15] A hundred percent.

[58:16] And the problem is that she set herself a goal that she can never be fully accomplished.

[58:17] She can never relax.

[58:18] She's like a gunslinger in the old west.

[58:19] There's constantly beautiful young women being born.

[58:20] The sword of doom.

[58:21] We're going to challenge her.

[58:22] Yeah.

[58:23] It kind of is her the substance.

[58:24] Yeah.

[58:25] Yeah.

[58:26] I mean, again, like there's a, there's an evil queen movie to be made just for her.

[58:27] Yeah.

[58:28] Yeah.

[58:29] Yeah.

[58:30] Yeah.

[58:31] Yeah.

[58:32] Yeah.

[58:33] Yeah.

[58:34] Yeah.

[58:35] Yeah.

[58:36] Yeah.

[58:37] Yeah.

[58:38] Yeah.

[58:39] Yeah.

[58:40] Yeah.

[58:41] Yeah.

[58:42] Yeah.

[58:43] Yeah.

[58:44] Yeah.

[58:45] There's an evil queen movie to be made just like Maleficent, where it's like all about

[58:46] how she's been, she's been gas lit into believing that her worth is in her beauty and she can't

[58:49] ever, she has to constantly fight aging and it's, it's a, it's a losing battle forever.

[58:52] And she becomes a tragic figure and she's doing worse and worse things to, in order

[58:56] to make that into order to try to keep on this track, this beauty treadmill, I'll pitch

[59:00] this.

[59:01] This'll be a.

[59:02] Yeah.

[59:03] This guy can't stop fucking pitching over.

[59:04] I can't help pitch.

[59:05] I'm just an idea factory.

[59:06] You know, I can't help pitching.

[59:07] Uh, I can't help pitching on IP.

[59:08] I don't control and have nothing to do.

[59:10] I'll let you see the fact it's fucking snow white.

[59:12] So you say that is IP.

[59:13] I could control this, but it's public domain, so yeah, I just can't use it.

[59:16] Make her a killer.

[59:17] Yeah.

[59:18] Make her a killer.

[59:19] Yeah, that's true.

[59:20] Now she's, I mean, she is a killer already, not snow white, but the evil queen, she said,

[59:23] go kill her.

[59:24] Pull her, pull her heart out.

[59:25] Anyway, the animals in the dwarfs are real sad, even grumpy cries for the comatose snow

[59:30] white.

[59:31] Uh, it's a, it's a sad moment.

[59:33] Uh, the Huntsman and Jonathan, they're in the dungeon.

[59:35] They work together to unchain themselves and escape the dungeon.

[59:40] And Jonathan steals a horse and the birds lead him to snow white and he kisses her and

[59:44] she wakes up.

[59:45] The dwarves are all sitting shiva around her.

[59:47] That's exactly what it is.

[59:49] Yeah.

[59:50] Um, they, they've covered the mirror mirror on the wall, uh, and the, uh, I, I think they

[59:57] did a pretty good job.

[59:59] I will say.

[1:00:00] of making that kiss not creepy

[1:00:02] between Jonathan and the unmoving Snow White, you know,

[1:00:06] because that is a moment that I'm sure,

[1:00:08] I'm sure is a possible problematic thing.

[1:00:11] And it comes off more as a goodbye kiss,

[1:00:13] consummation of the love they didn't get to have

[1:00:15] than a, oh, this is beautiful.

[1:00:17] Then in the original story,

[1:00:18] in the original story when Prince Charming

[1:00:20] just comes across a sleeping lady in the woods

[1:00:22] and kisses her.

[1:00:23] What is this I see, huh?

[1:00:26] Which is kind of what happens in Sleeping Beauty too, right?

[1:00:29] It's the same basic thing or no?

[1:00:33] I mean, they know each other by then, right?

[1:00:33] It's such a classic fantasy, guys.

[1:00:36] I guess so.

[1:00:37] To be awoken from a coma by a kiss from a stranger.

[1:00:40] Yeah, that's the side of the fantasy I'm thinking of.

[1:00:43] Yeah.

[1:00:45] Is that what Kiss from a Rose is about?

[1:00:47] The seal song?

[1:00:48] Have you read those lyrics?

[1:00:49] I have no idea what that song is.

[1:00:51] Are very complicated and confusing, yeah.

[1:00:53] Something about a grave.

[1:00:54] So someone's dead, I guess.

[1:00:55] No, it's just, it's not even grave.

[1:00:57] On the grave.

[1:00:58] On the grave.

[1:00:59] Oh, so the DVD copy of the grave.

[1:01:02] There used to be a graying tower by the sea.

[1:01:06] Yeah, yeah, it's all very Edgar Allan Poe.

[1:01:08] Light in the dark side of me.

[1:01:10] Yeah.

[1:01:11] And so she wakes up,

[1:01:13] she declares the need to overthrow the king

[1:01:15] and suddenly Dopey talks the first time

[1:01:17] and he says, well, we're not afraid.

[1:01:19] Bum, bum, bum.

[1:01:20] Snow White returns to her kingdom slash village.

[1:01:23] How late in this process do you think

[1:01:25] that they had planned on doing a like,

[1:01:27] getting armed up montage of like,

[1:01:30] the dwarves like grabbing shit,

[1:01:31] a la like Hot Fuzz or something?

[1:01:33] Because I feel like that is the kind of joke

[1:01:35] that they were planning on putting in here.

[1:01:37] Of them like.

[1:01:38] You think so?

[1:01:39] Like getting their equipment and shit ready

[1:01:40] and like bandoliers and stuff.

[1:01:42] I don't, I don't know.

[1:01:43] I don't know that that was ever a part of it.

[1:01:44] I mean, they don't really have that much equipment.

[1:01:45] They just have pickaxes, that's it, you know.

[1:01:48] I thought you were gonna say,

[1:01:48] how angry do you think the other dwarves are

[1:01:50] when they're like, Dopey,

[1:01:52] you could talk this whole goddamn time?

[1:01:55] The fuck have you been doing?

[1:01:58] Nobody asked me to.

[1:01:59] It's like in the old X-Men comics,

[1:02:00] they learn Wolverine's name is Logan

[1:02:02] and they go, your name is Logan?

[1:02:03] He goes, nobody asked me.

[1:02:04] And it's like, really?

[1:02:05] For months, you didn't ask this dude you live with

[1:02:07] if he had a name other than Wolverine?

[1:02:09] When you filled out your W-2 to be a member of the X-Men,

[1:02:12] you wrote Wolverine.

[1:02:14] So you're saying that when you went to a bar

[1:02:16] and he got carded, his license says Wolverine on it?

[1:02:19] Come on, guys.

[1:02:20] I couldn't talk at any time, only when it was funny.

[1:02:25] I forgot, what's that from?

[1:02:26] That's Roger Rabbit.

[1:02:27] That's right, Roger Rabbit.

[1:02:29] Handcuffs.

[1:02:30] Yeah, that's right.

[1:02:32] And that's the thing, these fucking Disney movies

[1:02:35] are basically like bad, like,

[1:02:37] remember when Roger, well, yeah,

[1:02:39] remember when Roger Rabbit came out

[1:02:40] and we were like, oh my God,

[1:02:41] I can't believe they're able to do this.

[1:02:43] And now that they can't do it and it's so bad.

[1:02:46] He's another one of old man Stu's tales

[1:02:49] of former special effects.

[1:02:51] Stuart turned into the Chris Farley show for a second.

[1:02:54] Remember Roger Rabbit?

[1:02:55] That was awesome.

[1:02:57] But I'm just saying, like, I don't know.

[1:02:58] Live action remakes aren't live, they're Roger Rabbit.

[1:03:02] Yeah, they're all Roger Rabbit.

[1:03:03] I think that's the issue.

[1:03:04] But there's no fucking weasels.

[1:03:06] No, there's no weasels.

[1:03:07] I'm getting worked up here.

[1:03:08] The one critter they didn't make.

[1:03:10] Let's not get Stuart too angry,

[1:03:12] but one of the major issues is, yes, no weasels,

[1:03:14] which is a problem, but also,

[1:03:16] that what's so great-

[1:03:17] Not one Pauly Shore.

[1:03:18] What's one of the wonderful things about Roger Rabbit,

[1:03:20] the many wonderful things in it.

[1:03:22] The one of the things about Roger Rabbit

[1:03:23] is Roger Rabbits are wonderful things.

[1:03:25] Their tops are made of rubber,

[1:03:27] their bottoms are made of springs.

[1:03:28] It's that they're not trying to make the cartoons look real.

[1:03:31] They just give them a little bit more shading.

[1:03:33] And that's the fun of it,

[1:03:34] is seeing people interacting with cartoons, right?

[1:03:37] There's nothing really that fun

[1:03:38] in seeing a person interacting with a mostly realistic,

[1:03:42] but not totally all the way there,

[1:03:44] kind of like cartoon character.

[1:03:45] Just enough that it's creepy, yeah.

[1:03:47] Yeah, just enough.

[1:03:48] And if you're trying to make it look super real, I get it.

[1:03:50] Then you go in the Jurassic Park mode

[1:03:52] where those are not supposed to be cartoon dinosaurs

[1:03:54] running around.

[1:03:55] They're supposed to be real dinosaurs.

[1:03:56] Man, what if there was a cut of Jurassic Park

[1:03:58] where it was fucking straight up 2D cel-shaded dinosaurs?

[1:04:01] The original one when they brought Don Bluth in

[1:04:03] to do the special effects.

[1:04:04] We've got this original,

[1:04:06] we cloned it from this Winsor McCay cell.

[1:04:10] So they used, they hadn't done all the DNA,

[1:04:12] so they used some of the DNA from Gertie the dinosaur.

[1:04:14] Now all the dinosaurs are turning into cartoons.

[1:04:16] Oh, it would be like the end of Cool World, but not bad.

[1:04:20] You know?

[1:04:20] I mean, it would just make the scene

[1:04:22] where Sam Neill is struggling with his glasses

[1:04:26] to see the dinosaur so much better.

[1:04:28] Yeah.

[1:04:31] I would love that.

[1:04:32] And then at the end,

[1:04:33] oh, then some of the dinosaurs are 2D,

[1:04:35] some are not 2D, some are 3D.

[1:04:37] So you can get like, you get a mix of them together.

[1:04:39] I would love to see that.

[1:04:40] The 2D raptors chasing them in a 3D,

[1:04:42] no, a 3D raptor is chasing them

[1:04:44] and a 2D Tyrannosaurus Rex shows up to fight it.

[1:04:46] And now you understand how that Tyrannosaurus Rex

[1:04:48] could sneak up on them

[1:04:49] because he's only two dimensions.

[1:04:50] You know?

[1:04:51] Just turns.

[1:04:52] Yeah, Sam is a dimension.

[1:04:54] When he turns,

[1:04:55] all you can see is maybe a thin little line.

[1:04:57] That's it.

[1:04:57] I thought it was just a line approaching us.

[1:05:00] Wait, let's get around the side of it.

[1:05:01] Ah, a T-Rex.

[1:05:02] Yeah.

[1:05:03] Well, T-Rex can only see movement

[1:05:04] because he doesn't have that dimension.

[1:05:08] Flatland Jurassic Park crossover we've been looking for.

[1:05:11] Oh, finally.

[1:05:12] Yeah.

[1:05:13] I mean, Jurassic Park,

[1:05:14] it does say loosely based on Flatland

[1:05:16] in the beginning, right?

[1:05:17] Yeah.

[1:05:19] That'd be amazing.

[1:05:20] So they go back to the village, the kingdom.

[1:05:22] Snow White starts inspiring people to sing and follow her.

[1:05:25] And she confronts the queen

[1:05:26] and the queen hands her a dagger and says,

[1:05:28] go ahead, take the throne back, kill me.

[1:05:30] And Snow White will not do it.

[1:05:32] She's too good a person.

[1:05:33] So the queen says,

[1:05:34] guards, kill her here in front of everybody.

[1:05:36] Which seems like you're just being inflammatory

[1:05:38] at that point.

[1:05:39] Like that's, if you're asking for a riot,

[1:05:41] then kill Snow White in front of the townspeople.

[1:05:43] But Snow White recognizes each of the guards by name

[1:05:46] and talks about the people they used to be.

[1:05:49] And they remember who they were

[1:05:51] and how they used to be good people.

[1:05:52] And they all turn on the queen.

[1:05:54] And the queen tries to stab Snow White,

[1:05:56] but the brigands show up and Quag,

[1:05:58] master of the crossbow,

[1:05:59] who has not used a crossbow this whole movie,

[1:06:02] he finally gets to use a crossbow

[1:06:03] to shoot the blade out of the queen's hand or whatever.

[1:06:06] And all of Snow White's allies are there.

[1:06:09] She's managed to unite all of the townspeople,

[1:06:11] the animals of the forest,

[1:06:13] the dwarves of the mines,

[1:06:14] the brigands of the also forest.

[1:06:16] They're all here.

[1:06:17] And it's all about, she's built consensus.

[1:06:19] She's a unity builder.

[1:06:20] It's a coalition.

[1:06:22] And the queen runs the mirror.

[1:06:24] And because of course her first priority is always

[1:06:26] who's the fucking fairest of them all,

[1:06:28] even when her power is going away.

[1:06:29] And the mirror is like, Snow White is good hearted.

[1:06:32] So she will always be the fairest of them all.

[1:06:35] And I'm like, so that,

[1:06:36] so what, I guess, because she was-

[1:06:38] Yeah, how did she,

[1:06:40] how was she the fairest for so long then?

[1:06:42] Yeah.

[1:06:43] For the long time,

[1:06:44] the sheer hotness of the evil queen

[1:06:47] still outstrips the inner beauty of Snow White.

[1:06:50] I see.

[1:06:51] At a certain point.

[1:06:52] I think that mirror has no magic

[1:06:53] and is just jumping on whatever bandwagon

[1:06:55] seems like it's going to get it to the next place.

[1:06:57] You know, that mirror is the JD Vance of this story.

[1:07:00] Just kind of like, yeah, I'll sell out my family.

[1:07:02] Sure, for power, of course.

[1:07:04] To be next to a-

[1:07:05] That's what the dwarves look like.

[1:07:06] The JD Vance memes.

[1:07:07] Yes.

[1:07:08] Yeah, they do.

[1:07:09] They look like a cross between the JD Vance meme

[1:07:11] and the filter you can use on,

[1:07:13] I forget if it's FaceTime or what,

[1:07:15] where it's called like nervous or something like that,

[1:07:17] where it stretches your face out in a weird way.

[1:07:19] Like the, anyway, might sound like-

[1:07:21] Is there a filter that just adds

[1:07:22] like a million pores to your skin?

[1:07:25] There should be, there should be.

[1:07:27] They do have very porous skin.

[1:07:29] You got to breathe when you're in the mines.

[1:07:30] Well, that's the thing, is when you're in the mine,

[1:07:31] all that dust gets into your pores

[1:07:33] and you got to sweat it out.

[1:07:35] And so I feel for those dwarves, yeah.

[1:07:37] Yeah.

[1:07:38] Yeah, who I think are never,

[1:07:40] I don't think they're ever referred to as dwarves

[1:07:42] in the movie, right?

[1:07:44] I don't know if they ever used that word, but-

[1:07:45] Maybe they're just called The Seven.

[1:07:47] Higgledy-piggledy, but.

[1:07:49] So anyway, the queen runs to the mirror

[1:07:51] and the mirror's like, you've never been the fairest.

[1:07:53] I've been gaslighting you this whole time

[1:07:54] telling you you're so fair.

[1:07:56] And she smashes the mirror,

[1:07:57] which then causes her to like decay into ash

[1:08:00] and all the ash gets pulled into the mirror universe

[1:08:03] before the mirror reforms itself.

[1:08:04] And Snow White runs up just to like watch this shit happen.

[1:08:07] She's like, cool.

[1:08:08] This is because she wants to see her enemy's final defeat.

[1:08:10] Yeah, yeah.

[1:08:11] Because there's no, there's in the Snow White world,

[1:08:13] even for, Snow White's good-hearted,

[1:08:14] but there's still no sweeter treat

[1:08:17] than to watch the destruction of your greatest foe.

[1:08:19] She yells, say hi to Kiefer for me.

[1:08:21] Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a deep feels, right?

[1:08:26] It's a mirror's callback, yeah, yeah.

[1:08:28] Because that movie existed in the Snow White world,

[1:08:30] like the same way Moby Dick exists in the world of Bone.

[1:08:33] Yeah.

[1:08:33] Imagine there's a little Stan Lee panel

[1:08:35] that pops up directing listeners

[1:08:37] back to the mirror's episode.

[1:08:38] Yeah, exactly.

[1:08:40] Dance and Dan, that's the name he used for it.

[1:08:42] Nice.

[1:08:45] And this ending apparently was not the original ending,

[1:08:48] but it's kind of smacks of,

[1:08:49] we had to throw a new ending on there.

[1:08:51] What was the original ending, Elliot?

[1:08:53] I don't know.

[1:08:54] I don't know.

[1:08:55] That's the extent of my knowledge.

[1:08:56] Perhaps-

[1:08:57] If you were gonna write a different ending for this movie,

[1:08:59] what would you have done?

[1:09:00] Oh, the queen would win, for sure.

[1:09:01] Yeah, yeah, I guess that makes sense.

[1:09:03] Yeah.

[1:09:05] Yeah, but that would probably play super well, right?

[1:09:08] It would play, I mean, in the world we live in now,

[1:09:09] I feel like half the audience wants the queen to,

[1:09:11] I mean, that's the thing,

[1:09:12] when the queen is like, you need strength, not delicacy.

[1:09:14] I feel like half the audience is like,

[1:09:16] I like what, she's saying the things we're all thinking.

[1:09:18] Yeah, yeah, we do need someone like that.

[1:09:21] As long as her soldiers are keeping the outsiders out,

[1:09:23] because our country has become a perverse,

[1:09:27] extreme version of its worst instincts.

[1:09:28] But anyway-

[1:09:29] Luckily, it's not just our country.

[1:09:30] A lot of countries are being bad.

[1:09:31] Thanks to a lot of countries right now.

[1:09:33] It turns out taking human brains

[1:09:37] that evolved hundreds of thousands of years ago

[1:09:40] to not be constantly bombarded by information,

[1:09:43] and then putting them in a world

[1:09:44] where they are constantly bombarded by information,

[1:09:46] and then for like a year, locked in their houses

[1:09:48] with no way to communicate with the outside world,

[1:09:51] but this endless information feed,

[1:09:53] drives people a little over the edge, you know?

[1:09:54] And just blasted with 5G or whatever.

[1:09:56] Yeah, so-

[1:09:57] Yeah, that's it.

[1:09:58] And also it's the contrails.

[1:09:59] Let's not forget-

[1:10:00] The Contrails, everybody, and the Novocaine in the water.

[1:10:02] Not Novocaine, sorry.

[1:10:03] The Contrails?

[1:10:04] Yeah.

[1:10:05] You mean Chemtrails?

[1:10:05] Chemtrails.

[1:10:06] Contrails is the actual thing.

[1:10:07] Yeah, yeah, that's the, what's in the water?

[1:10:10] It's not Novocaine in the water.

[1:10:11] It's, what am I talking about?

[1:10:12] Fluoride.

[1:10:13] Fluoride, thank you.

[1:10:14] Novocaine in the water would be pretty sweet.

[1:10:15] Great.

[1:10:16] Oh, man, I feel so numb.

[1:10:18] It's all the horrors of the world.

[1:10:20] This is wonderful.

[1:10:21] It turns out we haven't been putting Fluoride in,

[1:10:23] we've been putting Xanax in the water all this time,

[1:10:24] and things are working out pretty well.

[1:10:25] DVD copies of the hit action comedy, Novocaine.

[1:10:28] In the water?

[1:10:30] Yeah, Jack Quaid, baby.

[1:10:31] So, anyway, the queen is gone, ding dong, the witch is dead,

[1:10:37] and we reveal, at the end, the narrator,

[1:10:40] who was trying in the beginning, was dopey the whole time,

[1:10:42] and everybody dances, and they're all dressed in white,

[1:10:44] and maybe it's Snow White's wedding, I don't,

[1:10:46] is that what they're hinting at, or it doesn't matter?

[1:10:48] I don't know.

[1:10:49] It's either wedding or afterlife.

[1:10:52] Yes, where it's like a fancy person's tennis party,

[1:10:56] they're all in whites, they're all in whites,

[1:10:58] and they do a lot of stomping and clapping.

[1:11:00] Everybody's there, they're having a great time.

[1:11:02] I think Jonathan and Snow White kiss, probably,

[1:11:04] and the storybook closes, and the hedgehog

[1:11:07] that uses it as a bed waves goodbye to us, the audience,

[1:11:11] and I skipped ahead, there's no credit sequence,

[1:11:13] there's no like, Snow White will return in Age of Ultron,

[1:11:17] or anything like that.

[1:11:17] I couldn't bear to look.

[1:11:18] I like this afterlife idea.

[1:11:20] I'm imagining Rebecca's online,

[1:11:22] like, with her fan theories about Snow White.

[1:11:25] It's like, Snow White actually dies at this point,

[1:11:28] when Snow White recognizes the guards,

[1:11:30] that's actually a fantasy,

[1:11:32] when one of the guards stabs her in the back.

[1:11:35] Everything after that point is a dream,

[1:11:36] in her final moments, yeah.

[1:11:39] I mean, very clearly, she was like,

[1:11:41] kind of dead before that,

[1:11:43] so why did they bring her back to life just to kill,

[1:11:45] I don't know.

[1:11:46] So, that was Snow White 2025.

[1:11:50] We sure needed a new one.

[1:11:51] That was this year?

[1:11:53] That was earlier this year, yeah.

[1:11:55] Yeah, okay.

[1:11:56] And I'm proud of us.

[1:11:58] And it's already available to watch on streaming?

[1:12:00] That's crazy.

[1:12:01] What wonders is this world filled with?

[1:12:03] After being such a hit in the theaters.

[1:12:06] I mean, this movie was released in March,

[1:12:08] so it's like, this is not that crazy a gap,

[1:12:11] in some ways, for a movie that didn't last super long.

[1:12:14] A March release is usually a good sign, right?

[1:12:16] Mm-hmm.

[1:12:17] Has that changed?

[1:12:18] Everyone wants to leave the house.

[1:12:20] That's one thing I know about March.

[1:12:21] At this point, no theatrical release date,

[1:12:23] I feel like, is a particularly good one,

[1:12:25] because people have gotten so out of the habit

[1:12:27] of going to the theaters.

[1:12:28] You never know.

[1:12:29] Summer's still better than not, you know?

[1:12:31] Yeah, okay, Tom Cruise, calm down.

[1:12:33] I do think that February and March, in particular,

[1:12:37] are still the dumping grounds of films.

[1:12:41] But, okay, well, let's do our final judgments,

[1:12:44] whether this is a good, bad movie,

[1:12:46] a bad, bad movie, or a movie we kinda like.

[1:12:49] I am gonna say bad, bad.

[1:12:51] I think that this movie,

[1:12:54] I feel like people are trying in this movie.

[1:13:00] Yeah, a lot of work went into this movie.

[1:13:01] This is not a half-assed movie.

[1:13:03] I think that Rachel Ziegler does her best with it.

[1:13:10] She's trying.

[1:13:12] I think that the supporting cast,

[1:13:15] even if I don't like them that much, in general,

[1:13:18] are all trying.

[1:13:20] I think that they're trying to do something new with it,

[1:13:23] rather than just be a total rehash.

[1:13:25] And yet, I feel like, basically, all the choices are bad.

[1:13:30] And I didn't enjoy watching it.

[1:13:33] What do you have to say, Stuart?

[1:13:35] Yeah, this is a bad, bad.

[1:13:38] Yeah, I would imagine the problems stem from the very top.

[1:13:45] The choice to do a live-action,

[1:13:49] digital version of this story is unnecessary.

[1:13:52] It's already been done a million times,

[1:13:54] and it speaks to just the most boring impulses.

[1:13:59] Yeah, it's not very good.

[1:14:01] Yeah, I think, unfortunately, I'm gonna have to agree,

[1:14:04] because, as we said, a lot of work went into this.

[1:14:06] People are trying really hard, but you never,

[1:14:10] I'm not a fan of these live-action remakes

[1:14:11] with Disney animated movies, anyway,

[1:14:12] but this one, in particular, yeah,

[1:14:13] it feels like, at many points, you're like,

[1:14:15] why are they doing this?

[1:14:16] Like, what is, when we could have a live-action

[1:14:18] The Rescuers down under right now,

[1:14:20] I don't understand why. Thank you.

[1:14:21] This is what you're pouring your resources.

[1:14:22] Somebody finally says it.

[1:14:24] Where's my live-action Oliver and Company?

[1:14:26] Like, what's going on?

[1:14:27] It feels like a lot of work being poured into something

[1:14:31] that does not, the concept itself

[1:14:33] doesn't really necessarily deserve the work

[1:14:35] that's being poured into it,

[1:14:36] and maybe, as a result of that,

[1:14:39] everything just kind of comes off bland

[1:14:41] and unnecessary and kind of boring and not fun.

[1:14:46] What do you think?

[1:14:47] I'm also gonna say bad, bad.

[1:14:49] I agree.

[1:14:50] Rachel Ziegler was sort of born to play a Disney princess,

[1:14:53] and I wish she was given a better vehicle for it.

[1:14:53] Look at the size of her eyes, come on.

[1:14:55] She's bigger than those CGI doves.

[1:14:58] No.

[1:15:00] She is, if you haven't seen her old YouTube videos

[1:15:04] from when she was in a high school production

[1:15:05] of Shrek the Musical,

[1:15:06] and she was vlogging the entire process,

[1:15:09] she's an incredible musical princess,

[1:15:12] and this just isn't the vehicle for it.

[1:15:15] I do appreciate, like, freaks, though,

[1:15:18] and those dwarves were so freakish to behold.

[1:15:21] Like, it was more interesting than, like,

[1:15:24] the Mufasa lions that just look like lions.

[1:15:28] That's true.

[1:15:28] At the very least, these characters,

[1:15:30] as much as I found their designs off-putting,

[1:15:32] they had faces that could register emotion

[1:15:34] as opposed to, yeah, the new Lion Kings were like,

[1:15:37] this character's supposed to be singing about Hakuna Matata,

[1:15:39] and it's just a blank lion face with no emotion whatsoever

[1:15:42] and a blank warthog face, and you're like,

[1:15:44] and the animals were all kind of tawny browns

[1:15:47] of different shades because animals are designed

[1:15:49] to not stick out from their environment,

[1:15:50] for the most part, so they're not colorful.

[1:15:53] So yeah, there's a, so I guess if you're looking at it

[1:15:55] from a point of view of, from there,

[1:15:58] then this is a great movie.

[1:15:59] I wonder who would, here's my question before we go.

[1:16:04] Who would you want to see as the queen?

[1:16:06] Clearly, Gal Gadot was cast because she's super,

[1:16:09] at the moment, she was big.

[1:16:10] Now, for political reasons, she is not quite what she was

[1:16:14] in terms of a desirable superstar.

[1:16:17] And I would argue a certain lack of juice.

[1:16:20] Yeah, that too, but I think who would you,

[1:16:23] who would you want to see as the evil queen?

[1:16:24] Because I feel like that's such a pivotal role,

[1:16:26] and it feels like they don't have the person carrying it,

[1:16:29] who could carry it, you know?

[1:16:31] Ooh, I was not ready for this,

[1:16:33] so I will just keep talking for a moment

[1:16:35] while other people think.

[1:16:37] This is what we call vamping.

[1:16:40] I think like, get like a Jinx Monsoon in there.

[1:16:43] Yeah. Oh.

[1:16:44] Yep, somebody with, you know, who can play it big.

[1:16:50] Yeah. Yeah.

[1:16:50] You definitely want someone who can do it enormously, yeah.

[1:16:55] All right. Yeah.

[1:16:56] Ryan Reynolds.

[1:16:57] Yeah.

[1:16:58] I mean, it's gonna be Chris Pratt.

[1:17:00] He does all these characters, you know?

[1:17:02] I mean, he did all the dwarves, right?

[1:17:04] I didn't check the credits, but I'm just assuming that.

[1:17:07] He didn't do any of them, yeah.

[1:17:09] Hello, I'm John Luke Roberts,

[1:17:10] and I would love for you to give my podcast,

[1:17:12] Soundteam, with John Luke Roberts, a try.

[1:17:15] It's basically a parody of every type of podcast imaginable,

[1:17:18] made up with loads of brilliant comedians.

[1:17:21] It was named the best scripted sketch show

[1:17:22] by the BBC Audio Drama Awards,

[1:17:24] was a finalist for best comedy podcast

[1:17:26] at the New York Radio Festival,

[1:17:28] and it has just been nominated for best comedy

[1:17:30] at the British Podcast Awards.

[1:17:32] Surely, if there are any of you

[1:17:33] who have been nominated for the best comedy

[1:17:35] at the British Podcast Awards,

[1:17:37] surely, if there are three things you can trust,

[1:17:39] they're the BBC, New York, and Britain.

[1:17:41] So give Soundteam with John Luke Roberts a go today,

[1:17:44] available from Maximum Fun in all the best podcast apps.

[1:17:50] Hi, I'm Alexis.

[1:17:51] And I'm Ella.

[1:17:52] And we're the hosts of Comfort Creatures.

[1:17:53] We could spend the next 28 seconds

[1:17:55] telling you why you should listen,

[1:17:56] but instead, here's what our listeners have said about our show,

[1:17:59] because really, they do know best.

[1:18:00] The show is filled with stories and poems and science

[1:18:03] and friendship and laughter and tears sometimes,

[1:18:06] but tears are from your heart being so filled up with love.

[1:18:08] A cozy show about enthusiasm for animals of all kinds,

[1:18:11] real and unreal.

[1:18:12] If you greet the dog before the person walking them,

[1:18:14] or wander around the party looking for the host's cat,

[1:18:17] this podcast is for you.

[1:18:18] So come for the comfort and stay for Alexis' wild story

[1:18:21] about waking up to her cat giving birth on top of her.

[1:18:24] So if that sounds like your cup of tea,

[1:18:25] or coffee, Ella, we're not all brits,

[1:18:27] then join us every Thursday at MaximumFun.org.

[1:18:33] A quick live show plug.

[1:18:34] The Flophouse is coming to Chicago on November 16 at 7 p.m.

[1:18:39] We will be at Sleeping Village

[1:18:41] in the Avondale neighborhood of Chicago

[1:18:44] with our usual shenanigans of some comedy presentations,

[1:18:48] followed by discussion of the 1990 comedy,

[1:18:51] Taking Care of Business,

[1:18:52] starring Chicago's own Jim Belushi.

[1:18:56] If you've never seen us in person,

[1:18:57] since we've tended to mostly do shows on the coast,

[1:19:00] now is your chance.

[1:19:01] So go to tinyurl.com

[1:19:05] slash ChicagoFlop

[1:19:08] to get your tickets now.

[1:19:10] That's tinyurl.com

[1:19:11] slash ChicagoFlop,

[1:19:14] and that'll redirect you to where you can buy some tickets.

[1:19:19] This podcast, The Flophouse,

[1:19:21] is brought to you in part by Squarespace.

[1:19:23] Hey, you wanna get paid, right?

[1:19:25] Well, Squarespace gives you everything you need

[1:19:27] to offer services and get paid online, ya goof.

[1:19:31] Get paid online with on-bet,

[1:19:33] get paid on time even,

[1:19:35] with on-brand invoices and online payments.

[1:19:38] Everything's on these days.

[1:19:40] Plus streamline your workflow

[1:19:42] with built-in appointment scheduling

[1:19:44] and email marketing tools.

[1:19:46] And Squarespace offers, also offers in fact,

[1:19:51] a complete library of award-winning website templates

[1:19:55] designed by pros and with options for every use and category.

[1:20:00] Try and find a use and category without an option, I dare you.

[1:20:04] Intuitive, drag and drop editing, beautiful styling options,

[1:20:09] unrivaled visual design effects, no experience required.

[1:20:14] So, head to squarespace.com slash flop for a free trial,

[1:20:18] and when you are ready to launch, use offer code flop

[1:20:22] to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

[1:20:28] This podcast is also brought to you by Quince.

[1:20:31] Thinking about freshening up your wardrobe?

[1:20:33] Well, why drop a bundle on it when you can use Quince

[1:20:38] to fill out that wardrobe with some great basic clothing?

[1:20:42] Things like cozy cashmere and cotton sweaters,

[1:20:45] breathable flow-knit polos and comfortable lightweight pants

[1:20:49] that somehow work for both weekend hangs and dressed-up dinners.

[1:20:53] Now, an important element about Quince is that they work directly

[1:20:56] with the artisans and the designers, cutting out the middlemen

[1:21:01] so they're able to give you all your clothing at a reasonable price.

[1:21:05] And specifically, they only work with factories that use safe,

[1:21:08] ethical and responsible manufacturing practices

[1:21:12] to provide you premium fabrics and finishes.

[1:21:14] Now, Dan, you recently got a shipment from Quince.

[1:21:17] What do you think?

[1:21:18] I did. I got a charcoal cashmere sweater.

[1:21:23] Sounds amazing.

[1:21:24] I haven't been wearing it.

[1:21:25] It's going to look great on you.

[1:21:26] I haven't been wearing it around a lot because it's been hot, hot, hot

[1:21:29] here in New York City, as Buster Poindexter warned us about.

[1:21:34] But I have tried it on. It looks lovely.

[1:21:37] The cashmere was soft and at a much lower price

[1:21:42] than you would get that kind of a quality sweater.

[1:21:46] Maybe after recording, you can put it on and do a little fashion show for me.

[1:21:49] I'll dance around.

[1:21:50] Okay, so keep it cool and classic with long-lasting staples from Quince.

[1:21:56] Go to quince.com slash flop for free shipping on your order

[1:22:02] and 365-day returns.

[1:22:05] That's q-u-i-n-c-e dot com slash flop

[1:22:11] to get free shipping and 365-day returns.

[1:22:14] quince.com slash flop.

[1:22:15] The Flop House is also brought to you sometime.

[1:22:18] Actually, the Flop House is always brought to you by listeners like you

[1:22:21] who pledge every month and we thank you for it.

[1:22:23] But it's also, in addition, sometimes brought to you by listeners like you

[1:22:27] who take out Jumbotron ads.

[1:22:29] That's right. We've got a Jumbotron today.

[1:22:32] And this message is for First Name Withheld Elliot.

[1:22:36] No relation.

[1:22:37] And this message is from you from summer 2025.

[1:22:41] So I believe that this is First Name Withheld Elliot writing themselves a message.

[1:22:45] And they say,

[1:22:46] What's up, big dog?

[1:22:47] Hope you're thriving even though this summer your dad died and you turned 25.

[1:22:51] Keep on asking dumb questions.

[1:22:53] Insisting people spell your name right.

[1:22:54] Two L's, two T's, please.

[1:22:56] And listening to the peaches even though starting ten years ago ruined you for life.

[1:23:00] Thanks to Hallie and her guest hosts for always making me laugh.

[1:23:03] Row-row, et cetera.

[1:23:05] And I feel like there's a story behind this message

[1:23:09] and I hope that whatever that story is has come to the right, not ending,

[1:23:14] but come to the right point in the future.

[1:23:16] This reminds me of something I did many years ago

[1:23:19] was there was a website where you could write a letter to yourself, an email,

[1:23:22] and then set it to be delivered at some point in the future.

[1:23:26] And I did something very similar where I wrote a letter to myself

[1:23:28] and had it be delivered five years later.

[1:23:31] And it was a very meaningful experience for me

[1:23:33] to get this sudden message from myself from that time.

[1:23:36] So I hope that first name with Hallelujah,

[1:23:38] this has the same sort of meaningfulness to you.

[1:23:40] Would you like to send yourself a message through the Flophouse?

[1:23:43] You can do that.

[1:23:44] Just go to MaximumFun.org slash Gemotron

[1:23:47] and you can do the same thing yourself.

[1:23:49] Hallie, do you have any plugs?

[1:23:51] I have one amazingly important plug.

[1:23:54] And then I have a few lesser plugs.

[1:23:56] The lesser plugs are just for my stuff.

[1:23:58] Harley Quinn, it comes out every month from DC Comics.

[1:24:00] I write it.

[1:24:01] Volume 1 of the Collected Editions just came out.

[1:24:03] I just procured said volume.

[1:24:06] I am halfway through it.

[1:24:08] I probably would have devoured the whole thing in one big gulp.

[1:24:11] But Audrey was like, hey, there's this mystery show I want to watch.

[1:24:15] And I'm like, Audrey, you're sick.

[1:24:17] Let's watch the mystery show.

[1:24:19] But I've been enjoying what I've been reading so far.

[1:24:23] Yeah, and of course there's my other podcast,

[1:24:25] Clueless on the Smart List Network.

[1:24:27] But I've got an even bigger thing to talk about, guys,

[1:24:29] something that involves all three of us.

[1:24:32] That's right.

[1:24:33] The Flophouse boys are setting aside their rancor and the feuding

[1:24:37] that have kept us apart for all this time,

[1:24:40] and we are reuniting for another season.

[1:24:42] Don't fact-check that.

[1:24:43] Don't fact-check that, yeah.

[1:24:44] We are reuniting for another season of Flop TV.

[1:24:48] Flop TV season 3 starts this September.

[1:24:52] You guys, if you've seen Flop TV, you know what it is.

[1:24:54] It is the one-hour kind of internet television version of the Flophouse.

[1:24:58] You get a presentation.

[1:24:59] You get a video segment.

[1:25:00] We talk about a movie.

[1:25:01] We answer questions.

[1:25:02] It's super fun.

[1:25:04] We love doing it, and each season we get slightly better at it

[1:25:07] but in the Flophouse way of getting worse at other things

[1:25:09] while we get better at those things.

[1:25:11] It's a little bit like kind of our love letter to cable access shows.

[1:25:15] Yeah, that's a good way to put it.

[1:25:17] That's a good way to put it.

[1:25:18] This season we've got an all-new theme.

[1:25:20] This is season 3, Flopsterpiece Theater.

[1:25:24] We are going to be looking at a hallmark legendary flop

[1:25:29] from each of the decades from the 2000s all the way back to the 50s

[1:25:34] going backwards in time.

[1:25:35] So in September, we're going to watch The Adventures of Pluto Nash.

[1:25:38] In October, it's going to be Jack Frost, the Michael Keaton one

[1:25:41] where he comes back from the dead.

[1:25:42] Not the Jack Frost, not the killer snowman one.

[1:25:45] In November, it's Xanadu.

[1:25:47] In December, it's Zardoz.

[1:25:49] That's our z-z-double-month mini theme.

[1:25:53] In January, it's going to be Dr. Dolittle,

[1:25:55] the movie that killed a certain type of big-budget musical forever.

[1:25:58] Eddie Murphy, man.

[1:26:00] No, not that Dr. Dolittle.

[1:26:02] Robert Downey Jr.

[1:26:03] No, Rex Harrison, Dr. Dolittle.

[1:26:05] In February, we're going to do the grandfather of flops,

[1:26:09] Plan 9 from Outer Space.

[1:26:11] We're not going to be watching these movies with you.

[1:26:13] We'll be talking about these movies the way we normally do.

[1:26:15] These are not watch-alongs, but it's going to be super fun.

[1:26:17] It's the first Saturday of every month from September through February,

[1:26:21] and you can buy tickets for it right now.

[1:26:23] Go to theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[1:26:26] Again, that's theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[1:26:29] You can buy either individual tickets or a season pass that gets you a little discount.

[1:26:33] It's a six-show bundle, six shows for the price of five.

[1:26:36] It's like you get one free show.

[1:26:38] I'm really looking forward to this season.

[1:26:40] I think it's going to be super fun.

[1:26:41] I'm excited to talk about movies that we've never covered on the show

[1:26:44] but which have loomed large in the world of bad moviedom.

[1:26:48] And who knows what surprises are in store?

[1:26:51] Certainly not me because we haven't figured them out yet.

[1:26:53] But you guys, I'm sure you're excited too, right?

[1:26:55] How do you feel about this new season of Flop TV?

[1:26:57] I feel great.

[1:26:59] I was conceptualizing my special report for the first episode just the other day

[1:27:07] and laughing inside at all the shenanigans I'm about to unleash.

[1:27:12] Oh, I can't wait.

[1:27:13] I've been working on my presentation for that first episode.

[1:27:15] Yeah, you guys are not going to know what's going to hit you.

[1:27:17] Well, you do. It's a presentation.

[1:27:19] You know what's going to hit you.

[1:27:20] Stu, how are you feeling?

[1:27:21] I can't wait, especially because a lot of these are movies I've never seen.

[1:27:25] I'm going to be very curious when we watch Zardoz,

[1:27:29] a movie that has a lot in it to make fun of

[1:27:32] but a fair amount that I also really enjoy.

[1:27:34] So we'll see what happens.

[1:27:36] But that's theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[1:27:39] Join us the first Saturday in every month, September through February.

[1:27:44] And the episodes will stay online through the end of February

[1:27:48] so that you can catch up on what you've missed.

[1:27:50] Just because you missed an episode doesn't mean you shouldn't buy a ticket to it

[1:27:52] because you'll be able to watch it online, just not live.

[1:27:57] Yeah.

[1:27:58] And I have a small plug as well.

[1:28:01] My wife and I…

[1:28:02] What?

[1:28:03] Yep.

[1:28:04] Stuart Edward, your plug is not that small.

[1:28:07] Oh, guys.

[1:28:09] You've been paying attention to the Internet.

[1:28:11] So, guys, my wife and I have a new business venture.

[1:28:15] We've talked about it before,

[1:28:17] but we are opening a studio gym in Sunset Park, Brooklyn called Jiggle Studio.

[1:28:23] It's a gym space that has classes, everything from step,

[1:28:28] step aerobics to kickboxing to Pilates to pound

[1:28:34] and a variety of other types of activities.

[1:28:37] It's a really cool, body-positive workout space

[1:28:41] that's focused on fun and movement

[1:28:43] and not being worried about weight or anything like that.

[1:28:47] Pound is one of those exercises where you use sticks and you pound on shit.

[1:28:52] You pound on the ground.

[1:28:54] I'm not an instructor though, so take that with a couple of cents.

[1:28:58] But if you are interested at all or you just want to check it out

[1:29:01] or maybe buy some merch to help support,

[1:29:03] just go to JiggleStudio.com

[1:29:06] or follow us on Instagram at Jiggle Studio BK.

[1:29:12] Let's answer some questions, letters from listeners.

[1:29:17] This first letter is from Jonathan, last name withheld.

[1:29:21] Who writes?

[1:29:22] Oh, the Prince.

[1:29:23] Yeah, it's him.

[1:29:25] With a weirdly anachronistic question for the Prince,

[1:29:29] but Jonathan writes,

[1:29:31] Hi, Elliot.

[1:29:33] Back when tweeting was still a thing,

[1:29:35] I asked you a question about the power broker

[1:29:37] that you said you might be able to revisit

[1:29:39] once you got to that part of the book during your podcast with Roman Mars.

[1:29:43] My question was about the bonds that Governor Rockefeller pushed through

[1:29:46] to help upgrade NYP's transit and the LIRR.

[1:29:50] From my memory of the power broker,

[1:29:52] the book didn't address the final outcome of that bond.

[1:29:55] Do you recall what came of it?

[1:29:57] By the decades of neglect that followed,

[1:29:59] I think it's safe to assume

[1:30:00] went nowhere, but I hope you can shed some light on it.

[1:30:03] I wonder if Robert Moses had some role in killing it

[1:30:05] or funneling the money to his pet project.

[1:30:08] Thank you for the Flophouse laughs

[1:30:09] and the power broker learning.

[1:30:11] Although this letter seems to be mostly geared

[1:30:14] towards a separate podcast.

[1:30:16] I will say, well, he should have written

[1:30:17] into 99% Invisible, but yeah,

[1:30:19] I don't think they do a lot of letters segments.

[1:30:22] So there's two different bond issues

[1:30:24] that you may be referring to.

[1:30:25] I think you mean the 1971 bond issue, which did not pass.

[1:30:30] Well, you heard it here first.

[1:30:34] I mean, you specifically probably heard it here first.

[1:30:36] It's probably, you could have heard it here.

[1:30:38] I mean, that information has been around

[1:30:39] for 50 some odd years, ever since it happened, yeah.

[1:30:42] Yeah, the records are extant.

[1:30:46] This is from Bree, last name withheld.

[1:30:48] This one's for like all of us, right?

[1:30:49] Not just Elliot.

[1:30:51] Actually, it's mostly for Stuart.

[1:30:53] I didn't get to kick back this time.

[1:30:56] Dear Stuart, did this bond issue pass?

[1:31:00] I'm like, oh, fuck.

[1:31:02] Hey, peaches, when it comes to comic strips,

[1:31:04] we all know Dan loves the Archie comics so much,

[1:31:07] he named one of his kitties after them.

[1:31:09] Now, I'm just gonna take a brief pause

[1:31:11] and say that while I am fond of the Archie comics,

[1:31:14] I named Archie the cat after Archibald Leach,

[1:31:17] Cary Grant's real name.

[1:31:20] But the Archie comics are about him.

[1:31:22] Yes, of course.

[1:31:23] Yeah, before he was Cary Grant,

[1:31:24] he was always mixed-

[1:31:25] Young Cary Grant.

[1:31:26] Young Cary Grant was always mixed up

[1:31:27] with Betty and Veronica, yeah.

[1:31:28] And Moose.

[1:31:29] Moose, Dilton Doily, of course Jughead.

[1:31:32] But for the purposes of this-

[1:31:33] Reggie, Principal Weatherby.

[1:31:35] The joke of this letter.

[1:31:36] Miss Trundy.

[1:31:37] Dan loves the Archie comics,

[1:31:39] and that Elliot is basically the creator of Ziggy.

[1:31:42] During the recent-

[1:31:43] At this point, I poured more creative energy

[1:31:46] into it than I think certain other people.

[1:31:48] Yeah.

[1:31:49] During the recent Garfield episode,

[1:31:51] Stuart insists that he has a strong affinity

[1:31:53] for that fat orange cat.

[1:31:54] However, I've been listening to the back catalog,

[1:31:57] and I think there's a dark horse-

[1:31:59] They got the receipts.

[1:32:00] There's a dark horse storming around

[1:32:02] the track of Stuart's heart.

[1:32:04] Over the course of 456 episodes,

[1:32:07] Stuart references the ever-relevant newspaper

[1:32:10] and anthropomorphic bird-focused comic strip,

[1:32:13] Shoe, no fewer than seven times.

[1:32:16] I think he just did, like,

[1:32:17] in the last recording that we did, yeah.

[1:32:19] That doesn't seem like a lot of times

[1:32:22] to reference something until you think about

[1:32:23] how that something is the comic strip, Shoe.

[1:32:26] So I guess my question is, Stuart, why Shoe?

[1:32:30] Keep on flopping in the free world, Bree.

[1:32:33] So real quick, we have a guest today.

[1:32:36] Rebecca, are you a big fan of Shoe?

[1:32:38] I don't know if I'm familiar with Shoe.

[1:32:40] Yeah, I'm barely familiar with it as well.

[1:32:42] I believe it's a comic strip

[1:32:44] about birds that are journalists.

[1:32:47] Yes.

[1:32:47] Yeah, they live in trees,

[1:32:48] but they are newspaper birds.

[1:32:52] And they often hang out at a bar

[1:32:53] that is also in a tree.

[1:32:54] Yes, so this is a comic strip

[1:32:57] that's similar to Elliot's reaction to David the Gnome.

[1:33:00] This was the sort of thing that I would come across

[1:33:02] when reading the newspaper, just the comic section.

[1:33:06] I wouldn't read the actual newspaper.

[1:33:07] I'm not like Dan doing the fucking bridge puzzle every week.

[1:33:11] So I would be looking, and I'd always,

[1:33:13] like, I'd come upon Shoe, and I'm like,

[1:33:15] well, I've already read all the comics I actually like.

[1:33:18] Let me try and figure this one out.

[1:33:20] I've already done the Slylock Fox puzzle.

[1:33:23] I've already read Rose's Rose.

[1:33:26] I've already read, what, Bloom County.

[1:33:28] Yeah.

[1:33:29] I guess I'll read Shoe.

[1:33:30] And I never got it and didn't think it was funny ever.

[1:33:34] And I didn't like the way it was drawn either.

[1:33:36] But it is called Shoe, which is confusing.

[1:33:40] So I find it to be a fascinating touchstone

[1:33:43] and something to refer to when I'm just,

[1:33:47] my brain is blank,

[1:33:49] and I'm just pulling a comic strip out of it.

[1:33:50] Yeah, and Shoe, I feel like it's one of those,

[1:33:53] vaguely political comics that doesn't actually

[1:33:56] take much of a political stance about anything.

[1:33:59] Like Wizard of Id?

[1:34:00] Like, yeah.

[1:34:02] Or Croc?

[1:34:03] Pro wizard.

[1:34:06] Yeah, I just, like, Shoe would reference current events

[1:34:10] without a particular point of view.

[1:34:12] Unlike the far-right bird comic, Mallard Fillmore.

[1:34:16] That's the thing, it's easy to get Mallard Fillmore

[1:34:18] and Shoe mixed up because they're both birds.

[1:34:23] They're both journalists.

[1:34:26] But one is more of the kind of Johnny Carson style.

[1:34:29] I'm doing a joke about the news,

[1:34:30] but it doesn't really have a point of view.

[1:34:32] Whereas, yeah, Mallard Fillmore is more conservative.

[1:34:33] But Shoe, so I'm looking at the Shoe Wikipedia entry now.

[1:34:37] Shoe is a comic strip.

[1:34:38] Again, similar to Stewart.

[1:34:39] I would read it when I was a kid

[1:34:40] just because I read everything on the comics page

[1:34:42] except Prince Valiant.

[1:34:43] No, thank you.

[1:34:44] I'll look at the pictures.

[1:34:45] I like the haircut.

[1:34:46] I'm not reading that huge block of text.

[1:34:48] It's like a Snow White haircut, yeah.

[1:34:49] And yeah, yeah.

[1:34:50] And I'm looking at it now and I'm like,

[1:34:52] oh, there's so many characters in Shoe.

[1:34:54] And they all have descriptions here on Wikipedia.

[1:34:56] And it's like, if you asked me,

[1:34:58] I wouldn't even be able to tell you which one was Shoe.

[1:35:01] But each one of them has a name, has a personality.

[1:35:05] It just goes.

[1:35:06] And that Shoe is not only a long-running comic strip,

[1:35:08] it's one of the comic strips that continued

[1:35:10] after the death of its original creator.

[1:35:12] That's how in-demand Shoe was.

[1:35:14] So Shoe fans, write in, what is it you love about Shoe?

[1:35:18] Yeah, please.

[1:35:20] Mallard Fillmore fans, do not write in.

[1:35:22] I am not interested in your opinions.

[1:35:25] Go away.

[1:35:26] So let's get into some recommendations.

[1:35:31] Movies that we've seen recently or not so recently.

[1:35:36] Doesn't matter.

[1:35:37] So Dan has seen like 10 zillion movies lately.

[1:35:41] It's true.

[1:35:42] It's a weird, I mean, it's not that weird,

[1:35:44] but for some reason it's been a lot.

[1:35:47] So I'm gonna jump in first.

[1:35:49] Dan and I went to a movie the other night.

[1:35:51] We went to a early screening of Together,

[1:35:55] a new body horror codependency movie.

[1:35:57] So of course I went with

[1:35:58] my most codependent relationship, Dan.

[1:36:02] And it was almost too real for me.

[1:36:07] It is, it stars a real life married couple,

[1:36:10] Alison Brie and Dave Franco.

[1:36:12] And they play a couple that is dysfunctional

[1:36:15] and they get isolated.

[1:36:17] And then they start to come together

[1:36:20] in a, let's say, scary way.

[1:36:23] It's really fun.

[1:36:24] It was written, directed,

[1:36:26] and most of the VFX work were all done by Michael Shanks,

[1:36:31] who I must point out is a Flophouse listener

[1:36:33] and invited us to the screening

[1:36:35] and then let us fill him full of tequila afterwards.

[1:36:39] And it's a lot of fun.

[1:36:41] I think it is, I think it works.

[1:36:43] It manages to, the metaphorical stuff works

[1:36:47] and the relationship stuff works.

[1:36:49] And I think it's great.

[1:36:50] And it's gross and fun.

[1:36:52] And oddly, like kind of sweet.

[1:36:54] Yeah, I'm glad that you mentioned

[1:36:56] that we got to hang with the writer-director

[1:36:58] who was a hell of a nice guy,

[1:36:59] because, you know, like it could be easy to be like,

[1:37:03] well, you just liked the glamor of the,

[1:37:05] but even before we got to really meet him,

[1:37:09] I really enjoyed this movie.

[1:37:10] I know you did too.

[1:37:12] It was a blast, it's very good.

[1:37:15] Yeah, it's fun.

[1:37:18] I'm just excited to see you guys transition

[1:37:21] into the Ain't It Cool News stage of the podcast.

[1:37:23] Where you get invited to screenings.

[1:37:24] We got to sit in the green room

[1:37:26] to the Godzilla premiere and yeah.

[1:37:29] It was, I mean, it was very cool

[1:37:31] getting to watch Dan get to meet Alison Brie.

[1:37:35] Dan did one of his classic things

[1:37:36] where he doesn't know that I don't know what's going on.

[1:37:39] So he texted me and he goes,

[1:37:40] yeah, so Alison Brie touched my shoulder

[1:37:42] at this screening last night.

[1:37:43] And I'm like, what the hell are you talking about?

[1:37:46] We did talk about how we're going to go to this thing,

[1:37:48] but it was buried in a lot of texts.

[1:37:50] That he's not being all the celebs.

[1:37:52] I just don't understand.

[1:37:53] I don't understand how Dan just lives

[1:37:55] this glamorous lifestyle of constant being invited

[1:37:57] to screenings and meeting famous people.

[1:37:59] Meanwhile, I live in my bedroom, I never get to leave.

[1:38:02] Yeah, she and Dave Franco seemed very sweet

[1:38:06] when we briefly met them afterwards.

[1:38:10] Yeah, I saw, it'll be out by the time we see it,

[1:38:15] but I saw another advanced screening

[1:38:17] through a critic friend of mine of The Naked Gun,

[1:38:21] the new Naked Gun, and really enjoyed it.

[1:38:26] You know, there's a lot of talk about

[1:38:28] how much sort of weight is on this movie

[1:38:30] being one of the only pure comedies

[1:38:34] that has been like a wide release movie in a long time.

[1:38:40] It's funny that a movie this silly

[1:38:41] is kind of gonna bear the weight of like,

[1:38:44] what's the future of pure comedy

[1:38:47] in like theatrical screenings?

[1:38:48] But I really thought it was great.

[1:38:51] It was extremely funny.

[1:38:53] And for me, the stuff that worked best

[1:38:57] was sort of like the classic,

[1:39:00] like a new take on classic Zucker, Abrams,

[1:39:03] Zucker, Naked Gun, airplane style jokes.

[1:39:06] It didn't work quite as well for me

[1:39:08] when it got into like, we're gonna lampoon

[1:39:10] modern excesses of like Hollywood blockbusters

[1:39:15] because that stuff has gotten so down the road

[1:39:18] of self-parody already that like,

[1:39:21] it didn't do as much for me.

[1:39:22] Did they do any like bullet time jokes?

[1:39:25] Not that, but they did like a lot of jokes

[1:39:27] about like just how ridiculous action stars

[1:39:30] have gotten these days.

[1:39:32] And it works pretty well because it's Liam Neeson doing it

[1:39:35] and it evokes all of his like taken nonsense or whatever.

[1:39:39] But just on the classic like dumb joke

[1:39:44] after dumb joke after dumb joke level,

[1:39:47] it was really funny.

[1:39:48] And there are a couple of jokes

[1:39:50] that really made my audience just go nuts.

[1:39:53] So I had a good time.

[1:39:56] Rebecca, do you wanna go?

[1:39:58] Sure.

[1:39:59] I was also-

[1:40:00] at that screening, but in a, oh no, I'm sorry.

[1:40:02] No, no, I go blind, but it's fine.

[1:40:03] No, I was planning it, Elliot, to be like, ha-ha,

[1:40:06] I let him snake you.

[1:40:06] Yeah, I know, he snaked me, yeah.

[1:40:09] Well, also snaked me,

[1:40:11] because I was gonna say Naked Gun 2,

[1:40:12] because I saw it the same night I came in.

[1:40:13] Naked Gun 2, the sequel?

[1:40:16] Yeah, Naked Gun 2 1⁄2.

[1:40:17] The Naked Gun also, but I will say,

[1:40:20] when I got home from that screening, which I loved,

[1:40:22] my roommate was like, hey,

[1:40:24] I'm gonna watch Last Days of Disco,

[1:40:26] and I said, okay, sounds like a good enough double feature,

[1:40:28] and I've never seen Last Days of Disco,

[1:40:30] so watched that, and it was totally lovely.

[1:40:35] Was it a good double feature, though?

[1:40:37] Yeah, it made no sense, but sure.

[1:40:40] I know, I was trying to think of if there's any sort of

[1:40:43] thread that I could use to tie them together,

[1:40:45] but truly, no.

[1:40:47] Last Days of Disco is funny, but in a very different way.

[1:40:51] Yeah, a very grounded way.

[1:40:53] Maybe, when did the first Naked Gun come out?

[1:40:58] 88, 89, something like that?

[1:41:01] Well past the Last Days of Disco.

[1:41:03] Yeah, that's Whit Stillman, right?

[1:41:05] Last Days of Disco?

[1:41:06] Yeah.

[1:41:07] So, I'd love to see a Whit Stillman Naked Gun,

[1:41:08] very understated, you know?

[1:41:10] Just like, yeah, sort of like Witty Repartee Naked Gun.

[1:41:13] Chloe Sevigny in the Leslie Nielsen spot.

[1:41:16] I mean, let's pitch this to Disney+,

[1:41:18] what are we doing, come on?

[1:41:20] And Cruella De Vil is there.

[1:41:24] Yeah, we can make it IP somehow.

[1:41:27] So, I'm gonna, I'll finish up.

[1:41:29] I love that kind of a pitch where you're like,

[1:41:31] yeah, and the country bears.

[1:41:37] So, I've heard stories about,

[1:41:38] I always forget whether it was Hannah or Barbera

[1:41:41] who was in charge of pitching,

[1:41:43] but that he would go into,

[1:41:44] because one did the pitches

[1:41:45] and one kind of ran the actual animating,

[1:41:48] but that he would go into pitch meetings

[1:41:50] and he'd be adjusting the pitch on the fly

[1:41:53] based on what the executives were responding to.

[1:41:55] And then afterwards, he'd have to go back and be like,

[1:41:57] I know this is the show we talked about pitching,

[1:41:58] this is the show we're doing right now,

[1:42:00] because it's what they bought.

[1:42:01] And I just, I wish that I could be in a situation like that

[1:42:04] where I'm like, and then of course,

[1:42:05] there's an alligator, Noah Bear, and.

[1:42:09] And that's how Jabberjaw ended up being the drummer

[1:42:13] for a teen band.

[1:42:14] Okay, so that's why Captain Caveman

[1:42:17] has two young teenage girls following him around.

[1:42:21] So, I'm gonna recommend,

[1:42:24] I think this movie, a movie version of this

[1:42:26] has been recommended before,

[1:42:27] but I don't know about the TV version.

[1:42:28] So I'm actually recommending a TV show,

[1:42:29] but I haven't gotten to watch a lot of movies lately,

[1:42:31] but I did have some time

[1:42:33] where I was watching episodes of The Trip,

[1:42:35] the Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon TV show

[1:42:37] that was edited into a movie that was released in theaters.

[1:42:40] And I've always really loved the movie

[1:42:42] and watching the TV show, I loved it too.

[1:42:44] There's a lot more stuff in it

[1:42:45] and there's a lot more kind of serious stuff in it,

[1:42:48] but also a lot of their funny jokes.

[1:42:49] And I just love seeing those guys as the,

[1:42:54] I know as the movies get on,

[1:42:55] they like get less, a little bit less mean to each other

[1:42:58] because at a certain point

[1:42:59] they've been through so many trips together.

[1:43:00] But in this one, just the palpable fictional,

[1:43:04] I assume kind of like frustration they have with each other.

[1:43:07] I find this very fun, especially Steve Coogan's frustration.

[1:43:09] In the movie version, I feel like

[1:43:11] Rob Brydon comes off as this nice guy

[1:43:13] and Steve Coogan comes off as kind of like a jerk.

[1:43:15] And in the TV show, Rob Brydon comes off

[1:43:17] as so much more irritating than he does in the movie

[1:43:20] in a way that is very funny to me.

[1:43:22] So I recommend watching the, it's six episodes.

[1:43:24] They're very short, I'm sorry, four,

[1:43:26] yeah, six episodes, very short.

[1:43:28] And I recommend the trip to the TV show.

[1:43:29] That's actually in England, Elliot.

[1:43:32] That's a normal length of a TV show.

[1:43:34] That's true.

[1:43:35] Six episodes would be an actual television show.

[1:43:36] I mean, we're getting there.

[1:43:38] America is getting there pretty quickly, you know,

[1:43:40] that we're gonna have six episode seasons.

[1:43:43] Well, that's it.

[1:43:44] That's another episode of this show that has no seasons,

[1:43:47] but a lot of episodes, a whole hell of a lot of episodes.

[1:43:50] So they call him the master of the segue.

[1:43:52] No loose thread untied, they say about Dan McCoy.

[1:44:00] The master of the crossbow.

[1:44:03] It's just a compulsion I have.

[1:44:06] Of course, I would like to thank, first of all,

[1:44:08] Rebecca for being here.

[1:44:09] Is there anything you would like to plug

[1:44:12] or put out into the world before we go?

[1:44:14] Oh yeah, go to vulture.com.

[1:44:18] Go there.

[1:44:19] And click on the articles and then read them.

[1:44:21] Yeah.

[1:44:22] Oh yeah, I mean, that's just gravy.

[1:44:25] Or click on them and don't read them,

[1:44:26] because it's really the clicks that they-

[1:44:27] Yeah, what do you track?

[1:44:29] Where are the tracking elements?

[1:44:30] Yeah.

[1:44:32] Tracker on CBS Now.

[1:44:33] Thank you, thank you for having me.

[1:44:35] Dan, don't send people to CBS, send them to Vulture.

[1:44:37] What are you doing?

[1:44:38] Yeah, I know.

[1:44:39] Yeah, or direct competitor.

[1:44:40] CBS is prime time to learn.

[1:44:42] I mean, I don't want to send them to CBS right now.

[1:44:44] I'm very mad at CBS, but I couldn't resist

[1:44:47] a Tracker reference.

[1:44:49] He's taking America by storm, that guy.

[1:44:52] He tracks people.

[1:44:53] No, he tracks better.

[1:44:54] Such a popular show, Coulter Shaw, aka Tracker.

[1:44:59] That's it, that's my whole bit.

[1:45:00] Yeah.

[1:45:01] Not a bit, so much as a description.

[1:45:02] Just a fact.

[1:45:04] Oh, I thought his name was Tracker.

[1:45:06] You would think-

[1:45:07] His name should be Tracker.

[1:45:08] Yeah.

[1:45:09] But he has a cooler name, Coulter Shaw.

[1:45:13] Yeah, well, thank you for being here.

[1:45:14] Thank you for, yeah.

[1:45:16] I think it's because Elzbeth is out.

[1:45:18] And you're like, okay, that's her name.

[1:45:19] It's not like, it's like kind of lawyer

[1:45:22] or whatever her job is on the show.

[1:45:23] No, I mean, there's a long, rich history

[1:45:26] of TV shows named after their main characters.

[1:45:28] I don't think it's just Elzbeth

[1:45:29] that is causing this misunderstanding.

[1:45:32] Wait, Elzbeth isn't the first one?

[1:45:34] It's not like in Seinfeld, he's a Seinfeld.

[1:45:37] That's not his job that he does.

[1:45:39] That's his name, you know?

[1:45:40] In those other shows-

[1:45:40] Becker doesn't Becker, he is a Becker.

[1:45:43] Actually, that one's actually complicated

[1:45:44] because adding an ER makes it sound like

[1:45:47] that's like an old-timey profession.

[1:45:48] Yeah, he's someone who becks.

[1:45:49] Yeah, he's a professionist that he becks.

[1:45:51] He's a Becker, yeah.

[1:45:52] Well, speaking of Seinfeld, I'm sorry

[1:45:54] that you'll never see Unfrosted now

[1:45:56] that you missed your chance,

[1:45:57] but we're glad that you could be here today.

[1:46:01] Oh, I've listened to this podcast, truly,

[1:46:03] for now over a decade.

[1:46:05] Yes, this is very, very cool.

[1:46:08] Now you get to see how dumb we are in person.

[1:46:11] This feels like a 4DX pop-up.

[1:46:13] Yeah.

[1:46:15] Yeah.

[1:46:17] Because Dan spits a lot.

[1:46:18] Yeah, and shakes chairs.

[1:46:21] Well, thank you, and thank you to our network, Maximum Fun.

[1:46:24] Go to MaximumFun.org to listen to other great shows

[1:46:28] on our network, and also thank you to Alex Smith,

[1:46:32] our producer.

[1:46:33] He goes by the name HowlDotty when he makes music

[1:46:37] and his own podcast and does Twitch streams.

[1:46:39] Check those out.

[1:46:41] And just thank you for listening.

[1:46:43] For The Flop House, I've been Dan McCoy.

[1:46:45] I've been Stuart Wellington.

[1:46:47] I've been Elliot Kaelin, and we've been joined by...

[1:46:49] Rebecca Alter.

[1:47:01] I enjoyed your post about Pedro Pascal being the guy

[1:47:05] whose legs are long in movies.

[1:47:08] He was a tramp.

[1:47:09] Yeah, that makes it his thing, yeah.

[1:47:11] Wait, who's this?

[1:47:13] Pedro Pascal?

[1:47:14] Did you see the materialist?

[1:47:15] Of course I did, yes.

[1:47:16] So when he revealed he had leg lengthening surgery,

[1:47:18] I was like, that's also your power in the other way.

[1:47:21] Yeah, that's true, yeah, yeah.

[1:47:24] That's really funny.

[1:47:25] I just love that the materialist raises the possibility

[1:47:29] that there, at one point, was a tiny Pedro Pascal.

[1:47:32] I do like when he sort of kneels down and goes, huh?

[1:47:35] And you're like, oh, this is what he would've been like.

[1:47:37] Uh-huh.

[1:47:39] Immediately got the ick.

[1:47:41] Deleted all my folders of pictures of Pedro Pascal.

Ep.#458 - Snow White, with Rebecca Alter

Chapters

Transcript

Description