FH Mini 156 - The Peach Pit, with Hallie!

[0:00] Hey, everybody, and welcome back to the Peach Pit.

[0:07] That's right, your number one destination for post-show commentary on everyone's favorite,

[0:14] at least top five favorite, bad movie podcast, The Flophouse.

[0:18] I'm your host, Stuart Wellington, and I have some great guests here today.

[0:24] Three guests coming in to talk about your favorite show and mine, The Flophouse.

[0:29] That's right.

[0:30] I'm going to be joined today by Dan McCoy, Elliot Kalin, and Hallie Haglund.

[0:34] Hey, guys.

[0:35] Thanks so much for joining me.

[0:37] Thanks for this always unexpected trip into the beach pit.

[0:41] It's our pleasure.

[0:43] I did send an email to your publicists and your email.

[0:49] Oh, that's your problem, Stuart.

[0:51] I'm dead in Hollywood.

[0:52] it yeah the the email i sent was to dan mccoy and elliot with one t and howie with like 17

[1:02] l's yeah yes those are the wrong ones it's only 16 yeah um well so i sent a bunch of questions

[1:09] over to you guys dan it's true dan's career is over he can't get arrested in this town which is

[1:14] too bad since he's the black dahlia killer you'd think i was too young but no no so have you been

[1:22] on the Peach Pit before?

[1:23] I mean, I've been on the after show.

[1:25] Is that the same thing?

[1:27] This is, I think this is the after show of,

[1:31] maybe I think you're on the after show

[1:32] of the Peach Pit, maybe.

[1:33] I don't remember.

[1:34] So the Peach Pit is, of course, the-

[1:36] Where they hang out on Beverly Hills 90210.

[1:39] Right, exactly.

[1:39] I know that.

[1:40] This is one of the many reoccurring mini themes

[1:45] for the Flophouse podcast.

[1:46] This is the Peach Pit, which is a sub show

[1:48] hosted by me, Stuart Wellington.

[1:50] I'm also one of the hosts of The Flophouse.

[1:52] It gets confusing sometimes.

[1:54] So what we talk about here is we talk about aspects of The Flophouse podcast

[1:58] and shed a little more light on those aspects for our listeners.

[2:03] So one of the things we're talking about this week is Flop TV.

[2:08] You guys begged me to come on the Peach Pit to talk about Flop TV.

[2:12] Can you tell me what that's all about, Dan?

[2:14] We begged you.

[2:16] It's your own joke.

[2:20] We could say Flop TV is the one-hour internet video live broadcast version of the show.

[2:27] And we're about to have season four this September.

[2:30] Just a month will be starting.

[2:32] And so it's the first Saturday of each month and goes from Saturday through February.

[2:37] And it's like watching the film.

[2:39] Saturday through February.

[2:40] Sorry, September through February.

[2:42] Thank you.

[2:43] And it's like The Flophouse, but you can watch it and the episodes are a little shorter.

[2:47] Yeah, if you go to theflophouse.simpletix, that's T-I-X dot com, you can get tickets for the whole season, if that's the sort of thing you're into.

[2:57] If you like us pivoting to video, this is the way to go.

[3:02] So, yes, pivoting to video, what was the inspiration for doing a series of virtual live shows, Elliot?

[3:10] Well, I think we were there. I think there were two inspirations. One was looking for new ways to kind of express the Flophouse style to do Flophouse things together. And the other was looking for new ways to make money off of the Flophouse.

[3:23] Yeah, I think a big part of it was, I think it started during the writer's strike.

[3:28] And so it was sort of like, oh, how can we extend this?

[3:33] How can we do something during the strike?

[3:36] You know, and that has continued to be, you know, sort of like a personal strike for me.

[3:42] An uncalled strike, like an enforced strike.

[3:45] A strike that the industry, again, has called against me.

[3:50] But Elliot, you know.

[3:51] You're what they call an incel, involuntary celibate from work.

[3:54] Yeah, whereas Elliot has too much work.

[3:56] Oh, boy, I should really spread the wealth.

[3:58] Instead, I'm sucking it all up for myself, hee-hee-hee, shoving it in my greedy maw.

[4:03] But I think one of the things also speaking about Flop TV is that there's something working in television, which is collapsing currently, and it's harder and harder to make things.

[4:12] It was very exciting for us to be able to do something that we didn't need permission from anybody.

[4:16] We could just do it.

[4:17] Once we decided between the three of us to, like, put out a six-episode video version of the show where we have presentations and we have video segments, things like that, we could just do it.

[4:26] We didn't need anyone's permission.

[4:27] So we decided to do it.

[4:28] We griddled it ourselves.

[4:29] Oh, no.

[4:29] You guys have always told me that the best part about making TV is all the layers of bosses you get to deal with.

[4:35] Yeah, exactly.

[4:36] You're a misheard.

[4:37] The people saying no.

[4:40] The gatekeepers are what I really love about it.

[4:42] Actually, you misheard.

[4:43] What I said was the best part of waking up is Folgers in my cup.

[4:46] I stand by that.

[4:48] Your athletic cup.

[4:49] I take Folger coffee grounds, pour them into my jockstrap, and I just walk around all day.

[4:55] And then there's a rich, smooth smell that comes from there.

[4:58] I find the caffeine gets into my blood better when I absorb it through my scrotum.

[5:03] And it keeps werewolves away.

[5:07] It sure does.

[5:08] None of them have approached me.

[5:09] I've never seen a werewolf.

[5:10] I've never seen one in my life.

[5:12] Yet to encounter one, so you know that the coffee in my underpants is doing the job.

[5:22] Is that what Captain Underpants is about?

[5:25] What is Captain Underpants about, Dan?

[5:28] I think it's about a superhero who wears underpants, right?

[5:31] I think that's more for children.

[5:33] Do children like underpants, guys?

[5:36] Dan and I can be exempt from answering this one.

[5:37] Children do like underpants, guys, yeah.

[5:40] Except they don't really like it when you call it underpants.

[5:42] My children don't.

[5:43] No, they think it sounds babyish, right?

[5:45] Yeah, but I still do it.

[5:46] That's where it belongs, under their pants.

[5:48] They like to call it panties, yeah.

[5:51] Gross.

[5:52] They like to call it a negligee.

[5:56] They can't spell it, but they like to say it.

[5:59] Mommy, get me my negligee.

[6:02] Help me put on my negligee, Mommy.

[6:05] You're four years old.

[6:06] You can put on your own negligee.

[6:10] Have you guys, have you seen,

[6:12] there was a billboard I drove by the other day

[6:13] that just said panties in big letters.

[6:15] And I was like, what?

[6:18] Did you forget yours?

[6:20] Yeah, Elliot crashes his car,

[6:22] climbs out of the steaming rack of his vehicle,

[6:25] and it's like, somebody answer the billboard.

[6:28] He was like, oh no, oh wait, that's just my coffee.

[6:31] Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah.

[6:32] He didn't poop in his pants.

[6:34] No, no.

[6:35] That was the indication.

[6:36] No, but my poop is like coffee grounds, yeah.

[6:38] So, Flop TV, what are we talking about today, Stu?

[6:44] Well, I had a lot of questions.

[6:46] I should say my poop is like coffee grounds because I'm a sippy.

[6:48] I feed myself coffee beans and then I poop them out and then sell them, yeah?

[6:55] You're like a bat, right?

[6:57] Isn't that, aren't coffee beans like bat?

[7:00] Is there some intersection between bat guano and coffee beans?

[7:05] I mean, bat guano is a great fertilizer, but I don't know about that.

[7:07] Yeah, but the, yes, what is it, a civet?

[7:09] A civet, yeah, it's a type of cat.

[7:10] It's like a cat.

[7:11] It's a type of cat, and then they get it out of the cat shit.

[7:14] Now, the argument is that...

[7:16] Well, what does the bat involve?

[7:17] You introduced the bat.

[7:19] Nobody else has mentioned that.

[7:21] The thing about the cat, the argument is whether or not

[7:24] the enzymes within the cat's stomach

[7:25] is what makes those coffee beans taste better,

[7:28] or if it's just a selection process

[7:31] that the cats are going to be eating the best beans.

[7:33] Oh, I see.

[7:34] You need the bat to catch the cat.

[7:36] swallow the beans.

[7:38] Does the cat

[7:40] chew up the beans or

[7:42] they just don't? They just swallow them, I think.

[7:44] It passes through their system, yeah.

[7:47] Why don't they chew them?

[7:49] You got that rich cat flavor.

[7:51] How often have you drank

[7:52] coffee and said, needs more cat?

[7:54] I don't know. Do cats have like,

[7:56] do they have like good grinding teeth?

[7:59] No, I don't. I think their teeth are

[8:00] for tearing. Certainly don't. Archie

[8:02] had to have several of his teeth

[8:04] pulled. So how do you pick the movies?

[8:06] I just want to mention

[8:08] one person did drink some coffee

[8:11] and say he needs more cat

[8:12] and that was of course Alf Gordon Shumway

[8:15] continues to

[8:16] I'm going to look up this fat coffee thing

[8:18] I'll be back

[8:19] so how do you pick the movies for Flop TV

[8:22] I feel like the first season we had

[8:24] a collection of regular mentions

[8:26] do you want me to go down the list here

[8:27] we have movies like Beastmaster 2, Cool World

[8:30] Hot Dog the Movie

[8:33] and Hamburger the Motion Picture

[8:34] that was our meat double feature

[8:35] Over the Top, Ballistic, X vs. Sever, and finally, Nuki.

[8:40] Now, Hallie, have you seen any of these six movies?

[8:42] She was looking up cats, I think.

[8:44] The Best Tasting Coffee might be the one that Bats got to first.

[8:48] This is from Food and Wine Magazine.

[8:50] So coffee seems like it's a little out of their purview.

[8:52] Tom Colicchio must have written it.

[8:55] I hadn't heard that Bats had gotten into the game, too.

[8:57] Yeah, yeah, they saw how good things were for the cats,

[9:00] and they were like, we've got to get in on that, actually.

[9:01] What's good for the cat is good for the bats.

[9:03] As the old saying goes.

[9:07] So these first movies were mainly, were they just regular mentions on the show?

[9:13] That was the theme.

[9:14] They were movies that we had mentioned a lot on the show in a joke setting.

[9:18] And it was like, you know what, let's finally dig into these movies.

[9:20] Now of those six movies.

[9:21] Yeah, so we had Beastmaster 2, Cool World, Hot Dog the Movie, and Hamburger the Motion Picture,

[9:26] Over the Top, Ballistic X vs. Sever, and Nuki.

[9:29] Now, watching any of them again, were any of them surprises?

[9:33] Did you like them?

[9:34] Are you like, I shouldn't have mentioned this so many fucking times?

[9:37] I mean, I think that in terms of enjoyment, we start,

[9:39] we peaked early with Beastmaster 2, if I recall, for that season at least.

[9:44] I think I like Cool World the most, though.

[9:47] Yeah?

[9:47] I think, I mean, like...

[9:48] But I'm also dumb.

[9:50] No, no, no, you're not dumb, you're just gross.

[9:52] Yeah, thank you.

[9:54] I definitely have an affection that way.

[9:56] Yeah, you're just that Cormac McCarthy twisted.

[9:59] I have an affection for Cool World, but it's a really abrasive movie.

[10:04] I find it genuinely unpleasant to watch.

[10:06] But on the other hand—

[10:07] But your kids loved it.

[10:08] They loved it.

[10:09] They thought it was great.

[10:10] I think the—I mean, having said that, just showed my younger son, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, the other day.

[10:15] Big success.

[10:16] Very similar movies.

[10:17] Yeah.

[10:18] So, I mean, they hoped they were.

[10:21] I think the one I found the most unpleasant was Hamburger the Motion Picture.

[10:26] And I was not ready for how noxious I was going to find that movie.

[10:30] But I think I did enjoy Beastmaster 2 the most of all of them.

[10:33] Can you paint a picture of Hamburger the Motion Picture?

[10:34] Because I'm assuming Hallie is not familiar with it.

[10:37] Hallie, you've never seen Hamburger the Motion Picture?

[10:38] I don't even know why I'm here.

[10:42] Hamburger the Motion Picture is a not quite TNA comedy

[10:46] where it's like a bunch of people who are all kind of weird.

[10:51] TNA, like tits and ass?

[10:52] Yes, like all kinds of silly losers.

[10:55] TNA that we're talking about. They go to a university

[10:57] that's going to teach them how to work at a

[10:59] fast food chain, and they're all kind of

[11:01] so it's like almost a college comedy and

[11:03] not quite, but then there's

[11:05] them taking over the restaurant, and there's a lot

[11:07] of kind of like racist jokes, misogynist

[11:09] jokes. It's just not, it's not a

[11:11] fun movie. And this is not an animated

[11:13] movie. This is a live action movie. One of

[11:15] the big name stars was Dick Butkus,

[11:17] right, from, you know, the famous football

[11:19] coach. He could have been animated.

[11:20] He could have been. He could have.

[11:22] At any point. At any point. He could have been like

[11:24] Sergeant Slaughter, both live action and animated, you know.

[11:27] I have to say, I mean, it's embarrassing.

[11:31] I went, I found myself.

[11:33] Don't be embarrassed.

[11:34] YouTube was feeding myself back to me.

[11:37] Like, it was, like, suggesting.

[11:38] Like a human centipede with one person.

[11:40] Yeah.

[11:41] You were sewed to your own asshole?

[11:44] Yeah.

[11:46] I mean, I certainly went up my own asshole.

[11:49] That's the river of uros.

[11:50] i uh i was i was

[11:54] don't go there i i will is that why the snake is eating his own tail because a german scientist

[12:04] sewed him his mouth to his ass i mean that's how i describe the tattoo i have of that over my

[12:10] asshole oh no that would hurt yeah i watched the worth it i was watching some old flop tvs

[12:21] is what i'm saying like like they appeared in my feed i was watching some of them and

[12:24] i really enjoyed watching myself explaining hot chili to you the third oh boy yeah themed uh

[12:34] tna comedy that we didn't do that i'm like i discovered in the course of doing my presentation

[12:39] that it existed

[12:40] and I explained the whole thing to you.

[12:44] It was a fun time.

[12:45] I enjoyed it.

[12:45] Now, you mentioned presentations.

[12:47] PowerPoints are a big deal,

[12:49] a big part of the flop team.

[12:50] They're a big deal.

[12:50] Everyone's doing a big deal today.

[12:53] Now, why did you land on doing PowerPoints

[12:57] for live shows and for virtual shows?

[12:59] What do you like about PowerPoint so much, Dan?

[13:02] Well, we have been doing the Flophouse

[13:05] for a long time.

[13:07] I think it'll be 19 years in like, yeah, very soon.

[13:14] Actually, in a couple of weeks, actually, I think our birthday from from recording.

[13:18] Look how much older we all are.

[13:20] Yeah, no, I'd rather not.

[13:22] 19 years older.

[13:24] But I kind of forgot the exact date since tomorrow is where this is my son's birthday.

[13:30] And a week after that is my wife's birthday.

[13:32] But no, yeah, I should remember when the podcast's birthday is.

[13:35] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[13:36] I mean, the podcast is older than your kid.

[13:39] I have it on my calendar.

[13:40] Just for posterity.

[13:43] We got a real Jared Leno over here.

[13:48] Just for posterity, I have it on my calendar.

[13:50] It's like in mid-August sometime.

[13:55] So this probably will have—

[13:57] 14th, I think.

[13:58] Yeah.

[13:59] So this will probably have aired after that.

[14:01] Yeah, yeah.

[14:02] Or before.

[14:03] So everybody update your calendars.

[14:05] The podcast is officially 19 years old, not 18.

[14:09] Okay.

[14:10] Anyway.

[14:11] Take down the counter you had on your website until when the podcast is legal, you know.

[14:17] This was meant to be a setup to the answer that I was giving, which we got into the podcast game early.

[14:23] And we also got into the doing a live podcast show pretty early on.

[14:29] And when I – when we were putting together the show, I was always like we got to do something to make it worth people coming out to seeing a live show, to give them something that they can't get just listening to the show.

[14:44] Something – some new technology.

[14:46] Yeah, like PowerPoint.

[14:48] No, but something visual that is different than just like three guys sitting at a table talking.

[14:53] Which is most of the show.

[14:54] Yeah, live podcast shows that are just three guys sitting at a table talking, make money, people come to them.

[15:02] Not this one.

[15:03] But I was like, no one's going to be interested in this.

[15:06] So that's why we started doing presentations.

[15:08] Let's not forget that there was a period in the New York comedy scene at least, I don't know if it was elsewhere, when PowerPoint presentations were suddenly very popular.

[15:15] Like a lot of comedy people were doing comedy PowerPoint presentations and it seemed like a really fun way to like add something.

[15:22] So you weren't just doing stand-up, but you weren't just doing a monologue.

[15:25] And so we glommed onto that.

[15:27] I thought there would be a resurgence of salons.

[15:31] There wasn't.

[15:34] I would say, you know what I love about your PowerPoints, boys?

[15:39] Please tell.

[15:42] I just, I love the work you put into it, you know?

[15:47] I find it very obnoxious, especially when it's three men on a podcast

[15:52] And you're like, oh, you just rolled in.

[15:54] You're just riffing.

[15:56] Didn't even fix your hair.

[15:57] Yeah, didn't dress up.

[15:59] I appreciate that you show your work.

[16:03] If you're going to a podcast show and it's three men and they don't do a PowerPoint presentation, that's a deal breaker, ladies.

[16:09] Yep, red flag.

[16:11] If he's not going to do a PowerPoint for his podcast, he ain't doing one for you, ladies.

[16:20] I feel like you've been like slow launching this social media persona where you give relationship advice.

[16:28] Some of the stuff you do in bed, you could call PowerPoint.

[16:32] Not the way I'm doing it, ladies.

[16:38] Gentle pointing.

[16:40] I mean, there was that one PowerPoint.

[16:41] Yeah, I mean, there was that one PowerPoint.

[16:44] I did that one PowerPoint that was just pictures of my friend's cats.

[16:47] and I basically just was like, can you see that?

[16:50] And I could look over and see Dan getting increasingly more annoyed

[16:54] at how little work I put into my fastpoint.

[16:58] He's like looking at his reams of notes he had written,

[17:02] careful stage directions for how he was supposed to.

[17:04] All his research, all his lighting instructions

[17:07] for the different gels and spotlights.

[17:08] I've watched all of Hot Chili.

[17:13] So the second season of Flop TV was all sequels.

[17:17] There were six sequels selected.

[17:19] No squeak-wolves.

[17:20] No squeak-wolves.

[17:21] There was Robocop 2,

[17:22] Break-In 2,

[17:23] Caddyshack 2,

[17:24] Highlander 2,

[17:25] Ski School 2,

[17:26] and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2,

[17:28] The Secret of the Ooze.

[17:29] Is there a sequel you feel you missed?

[17:31] Is there a sequel movie

[17:33] that you think is worse than those six?

[17:36] Oh, man.

[17:37] This is like a good question

[17:39] that would actually require some thought,

[17:41] so I don't have an answer to it right now.

[17:42] I wrote these questions

[17:43] and sent them all to your inboxes.

[17:45] Okay.

[17:47] As we've already established, you sent them to the wrong inboxes.

[17:50] Oh, right, right, right.

[17:51] Let me do some quick.

[17:53] As was established by an earlier bid.

[17:54] So the idea was that I had to, oh, yeah, wait, that's the idea of the podcast.

[17:58] Bad sequels.

[17:58] Bad part two.

[18:04] Do you think there's a good sequel we should have talked about?

[18:08] Aliens, perhaps.

[18:09] I mean, we were.

[18:10] Well, I wish we could have talked about, like, Rocky IV.

[18:12] What about Godfather II?

[18:13] Which is such a fun movie to talk about.

[18:15] That's the thing.

[18:16] Godfather 2 is apparently the worst one.

[18:18] Okay, interesting.

[18:20] We were keeping ourselves to number twos,

[18:24] like direct sequels.

[18:25] Yeah.

[18:27] You know what?

[18:29] Usually we pee on camera,

[18:30] but for that one we pooped on camera.

[18:31] I will say, we could have done Speed 2.

[18:33] We'd already done a live show about that.

[18:35] Can you do that?

[18:36] I can't.

[18:37] I couldn't poop on camera.

[18:38] I'd get so much stage fright.

[18:39] You don't have to.

[18:40] I'd have to really save it up for a long time,

[18:42] so you'd have to do it.

[18:44] Those two girls, you're not going to name them.

[18:47] I'm not going to name names.

[18:49] There were no names.

[18:50] There was a couple and those two girls, and they did it.

[18:54] Yeah, I mean, at that point, it got popular enough.

[18:56] I mean, you'd want to put that on your LinkedIn, right?

[19:00] You'd want to.

[19:02] But the thing is, anyone could put it on their LinkedIn.

[19:04] How do you prove it?

[19:04] That's the thing.

[19:05] Sure.

[19:06] Anyway, it was the first sequels.

[19:10] If we hadn't been doing that, we could have done, like, Star Trek V.

[19:14] First sequels.

[19:14] Sorry, you were saying Speed 2, Elliot, but we did it for a live.

[19:17] We've already done a live show of Speed 2,

[19:18] but also Son of the Mask is one that we didn't do.

[19:21] I think because it didn't have a 2 in the title,

[19:23] but that could have been one that we did also.

[19:25] What about Five Will Goes West?

[19:26] Dumb and Dumberer.

[19:27] Dumb and Dumberer.

[19:28] Five Will Goes West.

[19:30] I saw Five Will Goes West again a few years ago,

[19:32] and I'm like, this is a zanier movie than I remember it being

[19:35] from when I was a kid.

[19:36] It also doesn't have a 2 in it.

[19:38] No, it has a 5 in it.

[19:39] If you're going to sneak a 2 in...

[19:41] If you're going to sneak a two into the...

[19:45] I mean, Son of the Mask, it's easy.

[19:46] You swap that, the S...

[19:48] Turn of the Mask, yeah, yeah, exactly.

[19:50] Or I was going to say the S in Mask.

[19:52] Son of the Mattook?

[19:55] All right.

[19:59] But where would you sneak it into Five-O-Goes West?

[20:02] Five-O-Toos West?

[20:04] No, the S in West.

[20:06] I got it, I got it.

[20:07] Okay.

[20:08] Five-O-Does West.

[20:11] Oh, yeah, because it's one of the southwestern Spanish there.

[20:16] Yeah, yeah, makes sense.

[20:17] It was Mexican land originally, you know.

[20:19] I mean, originally it was not Mexico.

[20:22] Anyway, never mind.

[20:23] Is it weird?

[20:23] I mean, originally it was dinosaurs, right?

[20:26] It's fine, it's all right.

[20:27] Everything used to be dinos.

[20:28] It's all dinosaurs, right?

[20:29] But even dinosaurs, there were other things before dinos.

[20:31] They still are in my house.

[20:33] I mean, just to give you a serious answer,

[20:36] the continents were placed in a different way,

[20:38] and a lot of our current land was underwater,

[20:40] so it doesn't quite map exactly right.

[20:42] Do you ever feel like with a little...

[20:43] Always talking about Pangea, this guy.

[20:45] Or Gondwana Land.

[20:47] As parents of little kids,

[20:48] do you guys just have a bunch of dinosaur facts

[20:51] that you can rattle off,

[20:52] or do you have dinosaur prompts?

[20:52] Yeah, as parents of little kids,

[20:54] that's why Elliot has a lot of dino facts.

[20:56] Thank you, Dan.

[20:56] That was exactly the point I was going to make.

[20:58] My children have very little interest in dinosaurs,

[21:01] which terrifies me.

[21:02] I don't like it.

[21:03] What's happening to the younger generation?

[21:04] Mine has a lot of interest in dinosaurs.

[21:06] Dinosaurs, bugs, you know, sea creatures.

[21:10] And you're very athletic, and my son is very athletic, and I'm not.

[21:14] We should swap children.

[21:15] Okay.

[21:15] Yeah.

[21:16] My children are also really into, well, we've had to limit it, but this is funny, I promise.

[21:22] They've started to watch.

[21:23] Unlike the rest of the show, which is hilarious.

[21:26] They started watching these YouTube bug videos, and then somehow we weren't paying close enough

[21:32] attention and it just started cycling into these videos of like this guy who like buys all these

[21:37] weird animals on the dark web and now now my four-year-old keeps coming up to me crying of like

[21:43] please can we go on the dark web

[21:46] oh no uh yeah it's all just beautiful insects on the dark web yeah i would love it if that was the

[21:59] kind of stuff my kids were watching on youtube instead it's all either minecraft videos or

[22:03] my son goes to a friend's house and they watch the uh amazing digital circus now like i don't

[22:09] want him watching that you know when we last used that language on that oh is that the is that the

[22:13] uh like poppies playtime thing similar because because i actually is into that but i won't let

[22:20] him watch it ellie when we last visited gabriel was watching uh cute uh animal videos with audrey

[22:26] And then, like, when Audrey left, he, like, hugged her leg and was like, remember the cute animal videos or something like that.

[22:31] He, like, wanted to make sure that she would watch them by herself at home as well.

[22:35] Has she been doing it?

[22:36] I mean, he does still watch cute animal videos.

[22:38] Right now, I mean, the big news in our house is that they just had a baby tapir born at the Fresno Zoo.

[22:44] And so he's following this baby tapir on Instagram.

[22:47] And we will eventually be taking a road trip to Fresno to see this baby tapir when it is on display at the zoo.

[22:53] You guys just wanted to talk about our kids the whole time, right?

[22:56] Yeah, yeah.

[22:56] Yeah.

[22:57] So adults who don't have children,

[23:00] they love to hear about other adults' children.

[23:02] You guys want to know, yeah.

[23:03] And also, I feel like this experience

[23:07] is going to teach your son a lot about parasocial relationships

[23:10] when he's been following this tapir,

[23:12] and then he meets him, and tapir doesn't give a shit.

[23:16] Yeah, exactly, yeah.

[23:17] He knows all about the tapir.

[23:19] I watch you all the time.

[23:21] Yeah, yeah, great kid, great kid.

[23:22] Anyway, I'm trying to use my weird trunk

[23:25] to pick up some leaves anyway.

[23:28] Is that a functional appendage?

[23:31] Very much so.

[23:32] It is a functional prehensile nose.

[23:34] While it does not have the strength

[23:35] or length of an elephant trunk,

[23:38] it can be used to pick up some things

[23:40] or bring things closer to the mouth.

[23:42] Can it smell?

[23:43] And it can smell, yes.

[23:45] It smells terrible.

[23:46] I was just talking to,

[23:47] Gabriel and I had been to the LA Zoo

[23:48] just a couple weekends ago.

[23:49] We saw the orangutan baby who's there.

[23:51] It was adorable.

[23:53] And we were talking about how strange it would be

[23:55] if your nose was also your main hand as it is for tapirs and elephants.

[24:00] Unlike with us where it's like the third or fourth most important hand we have.

[24:04] Yeah.

[24:04] I mean you can't pick up that much, one olive at a time.

[24:07] A lot of cocaine.

[24:08] Yeah, you can pick up a lot of cocaine.

[24:09] Your hands, it's actually a better hand for picking up cocaine than your actual hands, you know.

[24:13] Yeah, that just falls through your fingers.

[24:14] Yeah, then you just look like that raccoon who accidentally put its cotton candy in a puddle.

[24:20] Yeah.

[24:21] So this has been really lovely, guys.

[24:23] We're going to take a quick break.

[24:24] Will you stay with me when we return from this message from our sponsors?

[24:28] I guess so.

[24:29] Okay.

[24:35] Say, what's the trivia show where dreams come true?

[24:38] It's gotta be Go Fact Yourself.

[24:41] Legend in the house.

[24:43] We quiz celebrity contestants about topics they love.

[24:46] Then bring out surprise experts.

[24:48] To delight and amaze.

[24:50] And then finally, tell us why you know and love the lyrics to the song

[24:52] Knockin' Boots by Candyman.

[24:54] Joining us tonight is a rapper and producer.

[24:57] It's Candyman!

[24:59] Hello, Candyman!

[25:01] This is among the greatest moments of my life.

[25:05] This is one of mine, too. I love it.

[25:07] That's Go Fact Yourself.

[25:09] Twice a month, every month.

[25:10] Here on Maximum Fun.

[25:14] International Waters is back, baby.

[25:17] Do you like fun, silly conversations?

[25:19] do you like fun silly games we got them both and it's on international waters i am the host dave

[25:25] holmes this is a panel show that pits american and british comics against each other in a lively

[25:29] and hilarious competition what is gentlemen's relish who is bagpuss why is the oscar meyer

[25:35] wienermobile so emotionally resonant and why doesn't american cheese have its own anthem

[25:39] get the answers and be left with numerous questions about that and so much more nonsense

[25:44] and or cod swallow twice a month

[25:46] here on International Waters.

[25:48] You can catch International Waters

[25:50] on MaximumFun.org

[25:51] or wherever you get your podcasts.

[25:58] The Flophouse is sponsored in part by Factor.

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[26:04] you got a lot of stuff to do.

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[26:11] Feed myself.

[26:12] But you got to do it every day.

[26:14] three times a day it gets a lot and uh during the summer i know i've been traveling my co-hosts

[26:21] have been traveling it's harder and even if you're not traveling sometimes you're just

[26:25] tired you ever get tired oh boy who boy do i get tired i'm tired are you filibustering what is

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[28:28] We are also brought to you by Aura Frames.

[28:30] Now, unlike Dan and Stuart, I know the joys of parenting.

[28:35] And one of those joys is seeing your children grow up over time.

[28:39] But another joy is seeing how much joy my kids get at seeing themselves grow up over time.

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[29:25] when we lived in Brooklyn.

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[31:21] fluff house listeners i know you like listening to us but how about seeing us smelling us in real

[31:28] time having us in the room with you well you can make that happen september 18th that's a friday

[31:34] night 8 p.m we are going to be in louisville kentucky that's right at the whirling tiger in

[31:40] louisville kentucky we're going to be doing a live show we haven't done a live show in a while and we

[31:43] are raring to go it's going to be very exciting we're going to have a special guest that's right

[31:47] Our own Howell Doughty, producer Alex Smith, is going to be there with us.

[31:51] He's going to be at the show as our special guest, and we're going to be talking about Glitter, starring Mariah Carey.

[31:57] So that's us live at the Whirling Tiger in Louisville, Kentucky, September 18th.

[32:02] Go to FlophousePodcast.com slash events for more information and how to get tickets.

[32:08] I think you should go.

[32:08] It's going to be really fun.

[32:09] It's going to be a really good show.

[32:11] But let's say you can't make it to Louisville, Kentucky.

[32:13] And let's say you still want to see our beautiful faces while we are telling jokes and talking about movies.

[32:18] Guess what? You can because there's a new season of Flop TV coming out, as you know, from this mini episode.

[32:24] Remember, go to theflophouse.simpletix.com to buy your tickets for Flop TV.

[32:30] You can either get individual tickets for individual shows or buy a season pass bundle, six episodes for the price of five.

[32:36] It's like you are stealing the cost of an episode from us.

[32:39] So you get that little thrill of doing something naughty by not paying for that episode.

[32:43] But really, it's okay.

[32:44] We allowed it to happen.

[32:45] It's a bundle.

[32:45] You're paying for all the episodes at once.

[32:47] That's Flop TV Season 4, theflophouse.simpletix.com.

[32:51] And now, back to talking about Flop TV.

[32:55] And welcome back to the Peach Bit, the number one post-Flophouse review show,

[33:00] hosted by me, Stuart Wellington, one of the hosts of the Flophouse.

[33:03] And I am joined again by three megastars.

[33:06] That's right, Elliot Kalin, Hallie Haglund, and one Dirty Dan McCoy.

[33:10] Thanks so much for joining me, guys.

[33:13] So, Elliot, you were saying during the break that you have another animal fact?

[33:16] No, not a fact.

[33:17] I would say my younger son has also been caught up in Jimothy fever.

[33:20] Oh, yeah.

[33:21] Who hasn't been?

[33:22] Yeah, so that's also been a big parasocial relationship in this house,

[33:27] has been with Jimothy, the slightly deformed but in a cute way raccoon.

[33:31] I've got to say, over-under on how many people are going to dress as Jimothy for Halloween.

[33:36] It's going to be big.

[33:37] It's going to be crazy.

[33:39] And Jimothy is going to save all that money.

[33:40] It's going to be like the Joker, right?

[33:41] It's going to be like the Joker.

[33:42] But how do you think, like, what would you do with your costume other than just have a regular raccoon costume to distinguish between Jimothy?

[33:49] No, no, you've got to have a big, round raccoon costume.

[33:51] Well, first somebody has to come over and smush you.

[33:54] Yeah, yeah.

[33:55] And pull your legs a little longer than usual.

[33:57] Yeah, yeah.

[33:58] Yep, smash you with a hammer and then pull your legs out real long.

[34:01] Luckily, we live in a cartoon universe where you can do that.

[34:05] So we've been talking about Flop TV, and we're talking about performing live.

[34:08] Do you guys have any particular rituals that you like to do before you perform?

[34:16] Pre-show or post-show rituals?

[34:18] Guys, keep it PG.

[34:19] Thank you.

[34:20] Oh, so we can't talk about the pooping this tour?

[34:23] Pooping's totally PG.

[34:25] Your parents should guide you with pooping.

[34:28] I mean, PG stands for poop, guys.

[34:31] I think that my pre-show ritual usually is to like really withdraw within myself because I can feel my body being like you have to conserve what little energy you have to be on stage.

[34:47] So get even quieter and more withdrawn than normal until like two minutes beforehand and then get real pumped.

[34:54] Did this happen when you would –

[34:56] That's when the coke goes right up the hands.

[34:57] so you there were a couple moments where you were on camera for bits on the daily show did you do

[35:04] the same thing for that uh no that was just a lot of nerves nerves backstage a lot of like uh am i

[35:12] gonna look uh awkward am i going to be able to like i read teleprompter adequately uh no i you

[35:21] know honestly like i look at the things when i'm on the daily show and i'm amazed that i look

[35:25] relatively comfortable when

[35:27] I am on, which was very rare.

[35:30] I think part of the fun of that

[35:31] was that it was a place you worked. You were around

[35:33] people you knew. And I know that

[35:35] the times that I was on The Daily Show, it almost didn't feel like

[35:37] you were really, even though there's an audience

[35:39] there, it didn't feel like you were on a real TV show

[35:41] to me. It was just like, oh, we're goofing around, you know.

[35:44] Like you're making a little performance

[35:45] just for your parents to watch. Exactly.

[35:47] My parents' friends are over and they go,

[35:49] Elliot, come and do that thing you do. Put on

[35:51] your little show. And I'm like, ah!

[35:55] Do that thing where you reenact all of that thing you do.

[36:02] All right, opening credits.

[36:05] Directed by Tom Hanks.

[36:08] Oh, he did direct that one, right?

[36:10] He did direct it.

[36:12] Never mind.

[36:12] Are you going to say, how do you think it got made?

[36:14] No, I was going to say, how do you think Colin Hanks got cast?

[36:17] No, he auditioned under a fake name and a fake face.

[36:21] He had a big mustache.

[36:24] And they said, kids, shave that mustache and you're perfect.

[36:27] And Tom Hanks was like, he reminds me of a younger me.

[36:31] But, like, mixed with my wife, too, a little bit.

[36:35] It was somehow, like, it was like Tom Hanks with a little bit of Rita Wilson added in.

[36:41] Wait, is Rita Wilson his mom?

[36:44] I thought so.

[36:45] Or is he from her, is Colton Hanks from his previous marriage?

[36:47] I don't remember.

[36:48] I don't know.

[36:48] There's another daughter from a previous marriage, but I'm not sure.

[36:52] What about Chet?

[36:53] What about Chet?

[36:54] Yeah, where's Chet Hayes?

[36:55] He must be from the Rita Wilson marriage because he's a young guy.

[36:58] I'm looking it up.

[36:59] They've been married for a long time.

[37:00] Anyway, my pre-show ritual is that I quickly eat something and then tell my children to be quiet.

[37:05] And then I rush to the room and sit down just in time for the show to start.

[37:08] And how is that different from doing a normal live show?

[37:12] My children are not usually there.

[37:14] Although I think you call them, right?

[37:16] I do call them sometimes beforehand, yeah.

[37:18] You FaceTime with them and you're like this.

[37:19] His mom is not Rita Wilson.

[37:21] Oh, wow.

[37:23] Is that, are you going to give us any more information about that?

[37:26] Nothing more is known.

[37:28] It just says mother unknown.

[37:30] It's the David Arquette thing all over again,

[37:32] which you'll understand next week when that episode airs.

[37:35] It's like in Mandalorian Grogu.

[37:37] There's a card with a question mark on it.

[37:40] You want me to check out Chet?

[37:42] See who his mom is?

[37:44] Yeah, check him out.

[37:45] Check out that Chet.

[37:46] He's Chet's mom.

[37:47] Give us a rating on Chet.

[37:48] I think, so right before, one of the most fun moments

[37:51] when we're doing a live show in person,

[37:53] Rita Wilson

[37:55] Oh, nailed it everybody

[37:58] We did it

[37:59] Oh man, what's our trivia team name?

[38:06] So the

[38:07] I think our team name has to be

[38:09] Hanks for the memories, right?

[38:14] So when we're doing a live show in person

[38:16] one of the most fun things is

[38:18] before we go on stage

[38:19] we're not exactly pumping each other up

[38:21] But we're just kind of like being around each other, you know, feeling about like we're going to go on.

[38:25] We don't have that for flop TV because we're in a separate place.

[38:28] We have our tech check earlier in the afternoon, but it's not quite the same thing.

[38:31] It's a much more lonely experience.

[38:33] Yes, it is.

[38:34] Yeah, yeah.

[38:34] You feel like you're in a little bubble.

[38:36] Do you guys remember that time we were doing a show at UCB?

[38:39] It wasn't, we were like guests on someone's show and Jubin was there and he showed up and he was like, so are we doing scenes?

[38:47] Or like, are we doing characters?

[38:48] And I'm like, this is, no, no.

[38:51] We're just sitting around answering questions.

[38:54] It was really fun.

[38:55] That might have been the first time I ever saw the backstage green room area at UCB

[38:59] and realized what a dump it was.

[39:01] And this place that I had kind of like been always like, someday I'll perform here.

[39:04] Because I would go there and sit in the, you know, starting in college,

[39:07] I would go to UCB shows all the time.

[39:09] And I'm like, oh, man, these people are so funny.

[39:11] This is such an amazing theater.

[39:13] Someday maybe I'll get to be part of it.

[39:14] And then we were backstage and I'm like, this place is a dump.

[39:16] Are you thinking of Andy Beckerman's show when Hallie was also there?

[39:20] No, because that was at a different place.

[39:24] That was at the other location.

[39:27] It was the other location.

[39:28] Yeah, yeah, but that wasn't, like, the real UCB location.

[39:30] That was their, like, little theater.

[39:32] I don't remember all of the time.

[39:35] The Beast.

[39:37] Did you feel that experience when you, like, since you've all worked in comedy,

[39:43] Did, like, did that illusion drop in a lot of places?

[39:46] Like, when you guys started working at The Daily Show,

[39:48] were you guys, like, any glamour of it was immediately shattered?

[39:54] I think always, Elliot, of something that you said,

[39:58] so I'm going to say it.

[39:59] Always, Elliot, my fragrance.

[40:01] I'm going to take words that you had,

[40:02] and I'm going to put them in my own mouth.

[40:04] Oh, man.

[40:05] About how, like, the first time you were at the Emmys,

[40:07] it was, like, it felt very unreal.

[40:09] Like, it, like, took the glamour away because it's like,

[40:11] oh, this thing isn't a thing now because I'm inside it

[40:16] or something like that?

[40:16] Yes, well, that's how I felt.

[40:17] I really felt that way when the first time

[40:20] Jon Stewart hosted the Academy Awards

[40:21] and there was a montage that I had co-produced,

[40:25] the famous gay cowboy montage,

[40:27] where it was scenes from,

[40:27] that was the year of Brokeback Mountains.

[40:29] It was scenes from classic Westerns

[40:31] where there's this homoerotic charge to them.

[40:33] And watching that on TV, I was like, oh.

[40:36] Was that narrated by Ian McShane?

[40:39] No, that was the thing,

[40:40] That was the convention movie we did when John McCain was running for president in 2008.

[40:47] That was Ian McShane who narrated that.

[40:48] He was amazing.

[40:49] He was fantastic.

[40:50] But seeing this thing that I had worked on air during the Oscars, it suddenly brought the Oscars down a bunch of levels.

[40:57] Rather than making me feel like, oh, man, I'm elevated now.

[41:00] I'm part of this thing.

[41:01] That was where it was like, oh, okay.

[41:03] Well, this is like the fake Oscars.

[41:04] The same way that if I was coming home from work or from somewhere else and I would walk past someone's apartment and I would see that they had a TV on playing The Daily Show, I'd be like, oh, they get the channel with The Daily Show on it that people who work at The Daily Show get?

[41:18] Like it really felt like we make this show and then it just gets beamed to the houses of the people who made it.

[41:23] And it becomes hard for me to recognize that it's actually a thing that other people watch or enjoy or anything like that.

[41:30] So I think it was less like when I worked at the show, it was less like, oh, this is it.

[41:35] Oh, and more like, OK, well, now that I'm involved in it, it's not it can't be as cool as I thought it was.

[41:41] It was easy to forget.

[41:43] Exactly. Yes.

[41:44] I also had this where it was easy to forget that, like, other people watched the show suddenly.

[41:48] Like, even though it was a show that I had watched for years and years and years.

[41:52] Then it was like, oh, it's just this project that we're all doing together.

[41:55] And then we throw it in the trash.

[41:57] Yeah.

[41:58] Which is funny because I think conversely, and this is, this is not a criticism, but

[42:04] I do feel like when I worked at The Daily Show and for people who continue to work at

[42:11] The Daily Show, you often talk like everybody knows what the fuck is going on at The Daily

[42:17] Show.

[42:18] Like everyone.

[42:19] That's true.

[42:19] It becomes, you assume that this is what, because this is such a big part of your life.

[42:22] Yeah.

[42:22] Everyone is doing this.

[42:24] Yeah.

[42:24] Whereas most people are like, yeah, I, I, I don't actually watch that.

[42:28] Yes.

[42:28] Oh, yeah, I see it sometimes.

[42:30] And, like, when you were working there,

[42:32] did you feel like you had a different level of engagement

[42:34] with, like, the news or media?

[42:38] And all of a sudden you're like,

[42:39] why isn't everyone talking about this thing

[42:40] that we joked around about at the office?

[42:43] Yeah, very much so.

[42:43] You assumed everybody's life was based around

[42:46] yucking about the stuff you're seeing on the news.

[42:48] I mean, it reminded me,

[42:49] I had a moment where I was walking through Times Square once

[42:52] and I passed by the political pundit S.E. Cupp.

[42:55] And I was like, suddenly starstruck for a moment

[42:57] And I'd remind myself, wait a minute, nobody knows who this person is.

[43:00] Like nobody watches as much news, cable news as we do at the show.

[43:04] And the fact that I don't know most of the hosts of the cable news shows anymore

[43:09] because I don't watch them, I'm like, oh, this is a regular,

[43:12] like most people are not aware of all the ins and outs of the Fox News hosts

[43:16] and what their personalities are.

[43:17] And their relationships with each other.

[43:20] Yeah.

[43:20] When I walked past a New York One anchor on the street and I was like,

[43:25] oh, there's no one looking at Frank DiLillo from New York One?

[43:29] Not Chucky Beckford?

[43:31] No.

[43:31] I love Chucky Beckford.

[43:34] I wish it was George Whipple, honestly, so I could grab his eyebrows.

[43:39] Yeah.

[43:39] It was the opposite experience of a different time I was walking through Times Square

[43:43] and Michael Cera was standing on a street corner looking at his phone

[43:45] and I was about to go say hi to him and then had to remember,

[43:48] wait a minute, I don't know him.

[43:49] He's someone I've seen on television.

[43:51] He's not a friend of mine.

[43:52] You know, ironically, I was at a party one time and I watched the Two Girls, One Cup video with Michael Cera.

[43:59] Wow.

[43:59] I mean, I guess that's ironic.

[44:01] I mean, well, I guess because we were talking about Two Girls, One Cup before.

[44:05] Yeah, it's more of a coincidence than a irony.

[44:07] This is a real thing that happened, Hallie.

[44:09] Yes.

[44:10] Now, why did this happen?

[44:11] I don't know.

[44:12] We were at the release party for Two Girls, One Cup.

[44:14] Yeah.

[44:15] Which Michael Cera had produced.

[44:17] Do not open the swag bag.

[44:19] No.

[44:20] Keep it closed.

[44:22] I don't know. It was just some party. I'd never met him before, never met him since, and I remember he got really sad about it.

[44:29] I mean, that's a correct human reaction to have.

[44:31] That's better than if he was, like, weirdly into it.

[44:34] Yeah. And he's like, we should do that.

[44:38] That's what we all say when we watch Two Girls, One Cup. I've actually never seen it.

[44:41] I know I would not. I would be a Michael Cera about it.

[44:44] Alex, can you play the clip real quick?

[44:46] No, don't.

[44:46] that video was one of those things where like at the daily show gross videos would kind of like

[44:54] be circulated mostly in the studio production department but sometimes among the writers or

[44:58] other people or the field department and then that was one where it was almost like the video

[45:01] escaped containment and i'm like why are people outside of this building talking about this

[45:05] disgusting video like why did this become famous you know when remember when we wrote that piece

[45:09] for uh chat chat roulette yeah yeah yeah for katie kirk that was really fun she did a good job of

[45:16] She's like, oh, John, thank you.

[45:20] There's a place where scum dwells or something.

[45:23] There's a place where the sickest people on the internet dwell to act out their something fantasies.

[45:27] This is your part, John.

[45:28] She's like, I found one of these perverts.

[45:30] I've got him right now.

[45:32] John, now it's your part.

[45:34] She was really funny.

[45:35] The thing I remember most about the chat roulette bit was in rehearsal how it was so much footage of like people just whipping their dicks out and the crew loved it.

[45:44] They thought it was so funny.

[45:45] And then we put in, it was a moment of sex between two men, and the crew starts going, oh, oh, no, no, oh, that was too much for them.

[45:53] They thought they were loving it until that moment, and then they were all, it was just too much.

[45:57] It's all fun and games until people seem to be.

[45:59] Until someone finds love.

[46:00] Yeah, until, yeah.

[46:02] Makes an actual connection.

[46:04] Exactly, yeah.

[46:04] It's kind of sad.

[46:05] A rainbow connection, because the Muppets were there.

[46:07] Yeah, so that brings us to, wait, what?

[46:10] That brings us to season three of the Flop TV.

[46:13] That's what this episode is about.

[46:15] Flopster Bees Theater.

[46:17] That's where we went back in time, decade by decade,

[46:22] trying out some of the worst flops from the history of cinema,

[46:26] starting with Pluto Nash.

[46:28] Then we watched Jack Frost, not the horror movie.

[46:30] No, no, the Michael Keaton dad comes back as a snowman movie.

[46:34] Xanadu, Zardoz, Dr. Dolittle, and Plan 9 from Outer Space.

[46:40] Now, looking back over those movies,

[46:42] were there any that you think should have deserved more of a reimagining,

[46:49] should be considered, or a cultural re-evaluation?

[46:52] I mean, I'll stand by, during our Zardoz episode I talked about,

[46:56] that's a movie I think has a lot of great stuff in it.

[46:58] I think it is an imperfect movie,

[47:00] but I think it genuinely has some very beautiful and hard-hitting moments in it.

[47:04] And Xanadu is just...

[47:05] I like the music.

[47:06] Yeah, the music is really good.

[47:07] And Xanadu is so fun.

[47:09] Like, it's such a fun, dumb movie.

[47:11] When you watch it, you see why that's one that people have a lot of feelings for.

[47:15] Dr. Dolittle, on the other hand, is the longest of the movies we watched,

[47:18] and I remember it the least of all of them.

[47:20] Like, it just kind of passed through me like crap through a goose, you know?

[47:23] No, those are the two, Xanadu and Zardoz,

[47:26] very much on, like, different ends of the spectrum

[47:29] in terms of, like, lightness and just silly fun.

[47:33] I do like Elliot picking up a new, like, a folksy phrase like crap through a goose.

[47:39] Yeah, yeah.

[47:40] I'm trying out new things.

[47:42] Now that I'm getting older, I've got to talk like an old man.

[47:43] By the way, you're talking about Dr. Doolittle being old.

[47:46] Oh, boy, did we make a mistake with this best pictures theme?

[47:51] Because I was looking at the run times of all of these.

[47:53] I think all of them are over two hours long.

[47:55] Many of them are pushing three hours.

[47:57] Oh, no.

[47:58] So, yeah, that mentions that the final season, final.

[48:02] Oh, wow.

[48:04] Stuart, what is your scoop for this recording?

[48:10] The upcoming fourth season of Flop TV Tickets on sale now.

[48:15] I forgot that after this season,

[48:17] we agreed to all get into a space pod

[48:18] and journey to the farthest reaches of the universe.

[48:21] I guess I've been thrown in the trash

[48:23] like The Daily Show was after we made it.

[48:26] And for this final, final.

[48:29] Wow.

[48:29] Again.

[48:30] This is very Freudian, yeah.

[48:35] So for the fourth season,

[48:38] titled Worst of the Best,

[48:40] we are looking at all Best Picture winners.

[48:43] Yeah.

[48:43] Starting with Green Book,

[48:45] Greatest Show on Earth,

[48:47] Gladiator,

[48:49] Crash,

[48:50] Around the World in 80 Days,

[48:51] Crash, by the way,

[48:52] the racism one, not the sex one.

[48:54] The one that won Best Picture.

[48:55] Yes.

[48:56] The bad one, not the good one.

[48:58] The other one, yeah.

[48:58] No, the Cronenberg Crash did not win Best Picture.

[49:01] Then finally, a movie that may or may not actually exist out of Africa.

[49:06] We are finally going to answer the mystery that has bedeviled this podcast for I don't know how long.

[49:11] Does Out of Africa actually exist?

[49:13] I've only seen one of these six movies, and that's the one that I pushed for, which is Gladiator.

[49:18] Yeah, you really wanted Gladiator to be on there.

[49:20] Which, by the way, Stuart, we've already, like you pushed for that.

[49:23] We've already fielded so many people being like, what's Gladiator doing on this?

[49:26] People are losing their fucking shit.

[49:28] I mean, we needed another one that started with G after Green Book and Greatest Show on Earth, for sure, right?

[49:33] But Stewart was very intent that Gladiator be on the list, yeah.

[49:37] I'm going to, like, publicly say right now, like, I think that Gladiator will probably be the one that generally will be like, yeah, this is fine.

[49:45] Like, we're not going to be, like, down on.

[49:47] Is it the best picture?

[49:48] No, probably not.

[49:49] And what I'm also going to say is I'm probably going to watch it and be like, not only do I think this movie's bad, but anyone who likes it and would argue with me on the internet is worse.

[49:58] Wow.

[49:59] Stewart's really staking out an opposite claim than I was expecting.

[50:03] But I haven't seen Green Book.

[50:05] Greatest Show on Earth, how long is that one?

[50:07] Like 10 million years?

[50:08] That's about three hours long almost, yeah.

[50:08] Christ.

[50:10] And I say this because—

[50:12] That's about a circus, so how boring can it be?

[50:13] I think this is a theme that I also pushed for.

[50:17] I think I pushed for this theme, which makes me look dumber by the moment.

[50:22] Around the World in 80 Days, does it take 80 days to watch it?

[50:25] It's also very long.

[50:26] I mean, Greatest Show on Earth and Around the World in 80 Days are both movies

[50:29] from an era when you would do these big roadshow spectaculars.

[50:34] The idea was make the movie as long as possible

[50:36] because you're going to have a special screening of it

[50:39] that's better or more special than a normal movie.

[50:41] I have a feeling I might...

[50:43] Wait, is The Greatest Show on Earth the Zac Efron one?

[50:45] No, that's The Greatest Showman with Hugh Jackman and Zac Efron.

[50:48] This is The Greatest Show on Earth with, it's what,

[50:50] Charlton Heston and Jimmy Stewart.

[50:52] Jimmy Stewart's a clown in it.

[50:54] He's a clown in it.

[50:55] I'm looking forward to seeing that.

[50:56] The Greatest Show on Earth, I know more from the Mad Magazine parody

[50:59] of it, which was in a paperback of mad

[51:01] parodies that I had when I was a kid.

[51:03] I know that more than the actual...

[51:04] Grisham on Earth is the movie that inspired Steven Spielberg

[51:07] to become a filmmaker as a child, which is

[51:09] what... In The Fablemans,

[51:11] that's the movie he sees, where he's like, oh, I gotta become

[51:13] a filmmaker now. I can do way better

[51:15] than this.

[51:18] But he's never made a circus

[51:19] movie, has he?

[51:21] No. Can't be

[51:22] topped, I guess. He's made a lot of train stuff.

[51:25] I guess Steven was the original director

[51:26] on Big Top Pee-Wee until

[51:28] like he and Paul Rubens had their creative differences.

[51:30] Mm-hmm.

[51:31] I, you know, I, maybe I'll, you know,

[51:34] maybe this season will shut my mouth,

[51:36] but I anticipate maybe kind of liking

[51:39] Greatest Show Around the World in 80 Days

[51:42] just because it is an old-fashioned type of like,

[51:45] it's going to bore me, I'm sure,

[51:47] but I'm also going to enjoy like,

[51:48] oh, star-studded, like,

[51:50] everyone's going to be like an old Hollywood,

[51:52] you know, face.

[51:54] And my only experience with Green Book

[51:56] was my wife watched it on a plane and it was...

[52:00] I feel like there's a little earthquake just now.

[52:02] That was just me laughing and I shook the table.

[52:03] Oh, okay.

[52:05] Wow.

[52:06] Hey, that's a good credit to Dan's joke

[52:08] is that he made that laugh so hard

[52:09] he created a mini earthquake.

[52:11] I actually laughed at the joke

[52:12] that I was thinking of when Dan said it.

[52:14] Oh, I hear it.

[52:15] No, it doesn't work anymore.

[52:17] It doesn't work anymore.

[52:17] It was too good.

[52:18] But yeah, so Charlene watched Green Book on a plane

[52:20] and it was the like edited for content version.

[52:25] So all like the racial slurs were edited on her flight.

[52:28] So she's like, I don't know what's happening with this fucking movie.

[52:33] So, yeah, I guess I watched clips of it over her shoulder.

[52:37] So who knows?

[52:38] Did you guys see this one?

[52:39] I did not see Green Book.

[52:41] Crash.

[52:41] You guys see Crash?

[52:42] I did see Crash.

[52:45] It's the Dave Matthews song.

[52:46] That's the Dave Matthews song.

[52:47] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[52:48] It might be.

[52:49] Crash Into Me, right.

[52:50] The only time a song has ever won Best Picture.

[52:55] It was just that good.

[52:58] It created a picture in your head.

[53:01] They had to change the rules afterwards to show that, yes, it had to be a movie that won.

[53:06] Yeah.

[53:07] Nothing in the rule book that says a song can't win best picture.

[53:10] Oh, boy.

[53:11] Why didn't we write a bigger rule book?

[53:13] This is even worse than when that basketball-playing dog won best picture.

[53:19] I think Crash is, though, my vote for the worst best picture that I have seen.

[53:25] Ever or of this six?

[53:27] You know, Don Cheadle went to my high school.

[53:29] Whoa.

[53:31] Wait, was it high school Rwanda?

[53:34] Right?

[53:35] He was in Hotel Rwanda?

[53:36] Yeah, he was in that.

[53:37] He was in Hotel Rwanda, yeah.

[53:38] Was it high school for dogs?

[53:39] He was also in that.

[53:40] Oh, yeah.

[53:42] Wait, he was in high school for dogs?

[53:44] Yes.

[53:46] Not a movie high school for dogs.

[53:47] It definitely exists.

[53:49] All dogs go to high school.

[53:50] So you and Don Cheadle, were you pals?

[53:53] Yeah, did you and Don Cheadle sit at the same table?

[53:57] No, he's way older than me.

[54:01] I think he's got a pretty good age range, so he could play kind of anything.

[54:05] So it's not a comment on you.

[54:07] Well, we're not there at the same time.

[54:09] Okay.

[54:10] But was he like a legendary figure at your school?

[54:14] Not really.

[54:15] I can't even remember how I found this out.

[54:17] I think I found it out by reading his Wikipedia page.

[54:20] My high school is really not doing enough with that information.

[54:24] Yeah, you'd think they'd really be...

[54:27] Meanwhile, there's a huge statue of Annie Hathaway

[54:30] right out front of my high school, you know?

[54:32] Really?

[54:32] Annie, I guess.

[54:35] Everyone knew her as Annie when she was growing up.

[54:38] Sorry.

[54:39] It's still strange to call her Anne

[54:40] just because everyone knew her as Annie, yeah.

[54:43] There was a while where Elliot's Wikipedia page

[54:47] did incorrectly mention

[54:48] that L.A. had dated

[54:50] Anne Hathaway.

[54:51] I think my IMDb trivia

[54:53] may still have that,

[54:54] which is funny.

[54:55] Bullshit we made up.

[54:57] Yeah, we made it up.

[54:58] Escape containment.

[54:59] Yeah.

[55:00] Mm-hmm.

[55:01] So it sounds like

[55:02] we have a very exciting

[55:04] slate of pictures

[55:05] for this fun...

[55:06] Certainly a long

[55:07] slate of pictures.

[55:08] Fourth season of Flop TV.

[55:10] Stuart caught himself

[55:11] doing it.

[55:14] The...

[55:14] I am so thankful

[55:15] to be joined

[55:16] by the stars of the Flophouse podcast.

[55:18] Thank you so much for shedding a little light

[55:20] on the act of performing,

[55:22] what has inspired you,

[55:24] how you prepare,

[55:27] what has been your kind of go-tos

[55:30] and what gives you direction

[55:33] for picking the movies behind Flop TV.

[55:36] You're really making it sound like

[55:37] there was substance to this episode.

[55:39] No, I mean, I was gonna say,

[55:40] thank you, Stuart, for doing this episode-long advertisement

[55:46] for the thing we're doing yeah but but in a way in a way that i think added some entertainment

[55:51] uh a lot of joy having having hallie here having to waste hallie's time yeah because it was like

[56:01] it seemed so much like our own bullshit if if we didn't have an extra person around

[56:06] no i really have a question is there uh is like when you compare listenership between the act the

[56:13] like actual Flophouse episodes

[56:15] and then the mini ones.

[56:17] Oh, huge drop-off.

[56:18] Yeah, yeah, huge, huge.

[56:21] Big drop-off, huge.

[56:23] Not huge, but it's multiple thousands of people fewer.

[56:26] I have to go podcast now.

[56:27] Okay.

[56:28] But I want to thank you guys so much for tuning in.

[56:31] Now, this has been a Flophouse mini,

[56:33] which is part of the Max Fun Podcast Network,

[56:36] a network with a lot of great shows,

[56:40] similar to this one.

[56:41] So go check them out.

[56:42] This show has been produced by Alex Smith, who goes by HowlDotty on the internet.

[56:46] Check him out.

[56:47] Support him on Twitch, Bandcamp, et cetera.

[56:50] Thank you so much for joining me, guys.

[56:52] I've been Stuart Wellington.

[56:54] Oh, I've been Dan McCoy.

[56:56] I've been Elliot Kalin, and we've been inexplicably joined by...

[57:00] Allie Haglund.

[57:02] Check out my sub stack.

[57:04] I should have said that on the other one.

[57:08] We should have had you promote your sub stack.

[57:10] That's true.

[57:12] Well, the funny thing is, this is going to air before the main episode, which is going to make Hallie's appearance on this even more inexplicable to listeners.

[57:25] Actually, but Hallie, you should explain about your sub stack a little bit.

[57:28] At least tell us the name of it.

[57:29] Nobody's listening.

[57:31] They've already turned it off by now.

[57:33] It's called That Hurts My Feelings.

[57:35] Yeah.

[57:36] It's great.

[57:37] And I'll write about this.

[57:38] It's called That Hurts My Feelings.

[57:40] The only thing that ever gives me a boost in followers is when I appear on this podcast, which is why I wanted to mention it.

[57:49] So sign up if you haven't already.

[57:52] It's a must read.

[57:54] It's a must read.

[57:55] Okay.

[57:55] Must read.

[57:57] Bye.

FH Mini 156 - The Peach Pit, with Hallie!

Transcript

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