Flop House Classic - No Deposit

Elliott Kalan

[0:00] Hello, Flophouse fans. For our 400th episode, we are each re-releasing an episode we particularly liked, that we thought was particularly funny, from our past vast back catalog.

[0:10] And for me, it was hard not to go with this episode. So I did. It's called No Deposit, and it's a special piece of work.

[0:17] It came to us from some fans, whose names I've unfortunately forgotten, but I'm sure Stuart remembers them.

[0:23] And they pressed a DVD into his hand, and they said, you have to do this one.

[0:27] And it was this strange, self-congratulatory, self-saint-izing, self-canonizing movie from a very, it seems unpleasant man, named Frank D'Angelo, a Canadian beverage magnate who decided he wants to be a saintly gangster on film.

[0:45] And part of the joy of doing the Flophouse has been being able to discover crap like this, whether our fans lead us to it or we stumble on it ourselves, and having a place to talk about it and have fun about it.

[0:55] I think it's a really funny episode. There's a lot of really good jokes in it.

[0:59] And it's funny to listen to it now and hear how, in the episode, we talk about, oh, we've been doing this show for nine years.

[1:03] It's been nine years already, when, at this point, we've been doing this show for almost twice that.

[1:08] So those young boys in there, they don't even know what they're in for.

[1:12] And you can really hear the joy in those young boys' voices before they've been beaten down by another seven or so years of doing bad movies.

[1:19] So this is No Deposit, a movie I never would have heard of if we weren't doing the Flophouse.

[1:25] And I shouldn't be glad that I know about it, but I kind of am, because it's a special form of narcissistic vanity project.

[1:33] And it was a lot of fun to talk about and to relive us talking about it.

[1:36] And I hope you enjoy the episode, too.

[1:38] Thank you so much for being with us all these years.

[1:41] And now, without further ado, a Flophouse classic, No Deposit.

Dan McCoy

[1:45] Hey, everyone.

[1:46] It's Small Timber.

[1:47] Small Vember.

[1:48] And we watched No Deposit.

[1:52] What movie is this?

[1:54] It's so small, it might not even exist.

Elliott Kalan

[1:57] Did I get the name of the movie right?

[1:59] I think so.

[1:59] Yeah.

[2:00] Yeah?

[2:01] Yeah.

[2:01] Yeah, I think so.

[2:03] Check the DVD.

[2:05] And yes.

[2:11] Hey, everyone, and welcome to the Flophouse.

Dan McCoy

[2:34] I'm Dan McCoy.

Stuart Wellington

[2:35] Woo-wee.

[2:36] It's Small Vember.

[2:37] And I'm Stuart Wellington.

Elliott Kalan

[2:38] And I'm Elliot Caitlin, being real small for Small Vember.

Stuart Wellington

[2:43] So wait, so do you live in a little shoebox?

Elliott Kalan

[2:46] I live in a little matchbox.

Stuart Wellington

[2:47] Oh, wow, you're even smaller than I thought, Small Vember.

[2:49] You're very tiny.

Elliott Kalan

[2:50] I'll hop in your pocket.

[2:51] You won't know I'm there.

[2:53] Oh, so you can jump like a flea or something?

[2:55] Yeah, I have super bug jumping.

Dan McCoy

[2:57] You're spying on me while I'm changing?

Elliott Kalan

[3:00] A little bit.

[3:01] I can haul up your chest hair in the middle of the night when you're sleeping.

Stuart Wellington

[3:04] I think I saw a Up All Night movie where a guy was crawling around in somebody's pubes like that.

[3:12] But they were like, he was super tiny, so it was like, Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

[3:16] Like, he was like, climbing around.

[3:16] Or the Incredible Shrinking Man.

[3:18] Yeah, I think that's what the movie was.

[3:19] No, it was like, Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

Elliott Kalan

[3:21] Yeah, exactly like it.

[3:21] Oh, yeah, the pubes scene in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids when Rick Moranis accidentally drops the kids in his pants.

Stuart Wellington

[3:27] Yeah, yeah, yeah, and they have to traverse his jungle of a bush.

[3:32] I can only assume.

[3:34] Fighting off crabs.

[3:36] Just like in the...

[3:37] Or like actual crabs.

[3:39] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[3:39] Like in the Rudyard Kipling classic, The Jungle Bush.

Stuart Wellington

[3:44] In which Mowgli goes through some changes.

[3:47] Uh-huh.

[3:48] He gets real small and climbs around in a bush.

[3:51] Exactly.

Dan McCoy

[3:52] Yeah.

[3:52] A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

[3:55] Yeah.

[3:55] I've been told.

[3:56] By who?

[3:57] I don't know.

[3:59] So what do we do here on the society?

[4:00] Are you guys counselors?

Elliott Kalan

[4:01] Your parole officer told you that?

[4:04] I don't think I've actually been told that.

[4:05] You see two birds in the bush, you drop that bird in your hand and you go for them.

[4:09] Because two is more than one.

[4:10] While he's doing that, I'm going to pick up the bird that he dropped.

Stuart Wellington

[4:13] More bird for me.

[4:15] Okay, but are you just going to pick up one or is there a second bird for you to grab?

[4:18] It depends on how many he catches.

[4:20] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[4:21] What kind of bird is this?

[4:23] Why do I want it so much?

[4:25] Because you can eat it.

[4:26] Yeah, but...

[4:27] Like a pigeon.

[4:29] Like a wormy pigeon.

[4:30] Gross.

[4:31] Well, one, pigeons are a delicacy all over the world.

Elliott Kalan

[4:33] Two, why is it wormy?

[4:34] Is it dead already?

[4:35] In that case, don't bother with it.

[4:37] Not the challenge you think it is.

[4:40] Stop waving it around in your hand.

[4:42] Put it down.

[4:43] That's disgusting.

[4:44] Where did you even get that?

[4:45] For those who can't see, because you're listening to this, Dan is holding the wormy corpse of a pigeon.

[4:50] And he's just waving it around.

[4:51] Yeah, his name's Edgar, and he's my friend.

[4:53] Oh, don't pretend it's a backscratcher.

[4:55] Stop doing prop work with it.

[4:58] Now it's a phone.

[4:59] Oh, I get it.

[5:00] Yeah.

[5:00] Yeah, yeah.

[5:01] Now it's a mirror.

[5:02] Now it's a microphone you're singing old doo-wop tunes into.

[5:04] Now you're telling it to talk to the hand, I guess.

Dan McCoy

[5:08] This is from the new show, Whose Corpse Is It Anyway?

[5:14] You've got to do improv with dead things.

Elliott Kalan

[5:17] That's like that old horror movie, where children shouldn't do improv with dead things.

[5:20] That's right.

[5:22] So what's Smallvember, Dan?

[5:24] Well, explain what this podcast is, and then explain what Smallvember is.

Dan McCoy

[5:27] Well, Smalltember, as I meant to name it before my tongue slipped.

Elliott Kalan

[5:32] Unfortunately, it's a real champing at the bit, chomping at the bit situation, where pedants

[5:39] will tell you, also pronounced pedants correctly, is they will tell you it's...

[5:43] Pedants will tell you it's pronounced pedants.

[5:45] They will tell you it's champing at the bit, or you've got another think coming.

[5:49] But real people say chomping at the bit, and you've got another thing coming, because

[5:53] they make more sense.

[5:55] They're better.

[5:56] So much as the pedants in the ivory...

[5:58] That makes equal sense, I would say.

[5:59] You've got another think coming.

[6:01] No one talks about having a think.

[6:02] Who's going to say that?

[6:03] You have a thought.

[6:04] You could say you have another thought coming, but maybe...

[6:07] Yeah, but what thing do you have coming?

[6:10] A comeuppance?

[6:11] Yeah, yeah.

[6:11] Another idea?

[6:12] It seems pretty vague.

[6:13] The wonderful thing about thingers, Dan, is that thingers are wonderful things.

[6:16] A thing can be anything.

[6:18] That's what the word thing means.

[6:19] It means anything, or...

[6:21] That's the problem.

[6:22] A hand that just crawls around on its own, or a big rock man who smokes cigars before

[6:26] Marvel decided its heroes didn't smoke cigars anymore.

Stuart Wellington

[6:29] And, you know, deep down, even though he looks like a rock monster man, he's got a really...

[6:34] Rock monster!

[6:36] Man!

[6:37] Down, down.

[6:38] He's got a really, like, good soul, you know?

[6:41] Sure, yeah.

[6:42] He's like a good guy.

Elliott Kalan

[6:42] He's still Benjamin J. Grimm, Aunt Petunia's favorite nephew, the ever-loving blue-eyed

[6:48] thing, or as my son calls him, the anything or the something.

[6:53] He hasn't quite wrapped his mind around the idea that the guy's just called the thing.

[6:57] But, Dan, you and your ivory tower, Ivy League world maybe say small timber.

[7:02] All right.

[7:02] But us on the streets, the everyday folk living their lives and just trying their best to

[7:07] get by, we say small-vember.

[7:10] We say nuclear.

[7:11] We say library.

[7:15] You say foilage.

[7:17] You say washroom.

[7:18] I say washroom.

[7:19] Yeah, I say turtlet.

[7:20] And I say small-vember.

[7:22] Okay.

[7:23] A turtlet is half turtle, half toilet.

[7:25] It's a living.

[7:27] As seen in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtlets.

Dan McCoy

[7:33] So, small-vember is, what is it?

[7:35] What do we do on this podcast on a small-vember?

[7:36] So, normally, we like to punch up.

[7:38] We like to make fun of big movies or at least movies that got a wide release in theaters.

[7:45] Movies were the people who made them go and live in fancy houses.

[7:48] Yeah.

[7:48] Mm-hmm.

[7:49] But in small-vember, we, you know, we throw away our morals and decide to take on smaller

[7:56] movies, real passion projects.

Stuart Wellington

[7:58] And they're usually the best.

[8:00] And boy, howdy.

[8:02] Oh, jewelikers.

[8:03] Guys, now, this is an example of why we do this podcast.

Dan McCoy

[8:10] Well, why don't you tell the story of how we came across this movie.

[8:13] Okay.

[8:14] So.

[8:15] Which is called No Deposit.

[8:16] I'm going to check on that right now.

[8:18] We're watching.

[8:19] Nope.

Elliott Kalan

[8:20] A lot of Foley work there with the chair.

[8:21] That's a loud sound of Dan.

[8:22] I mean, I also can just look it up online.

[8:25] Wow.

[8:26] Keeps going.

[8:27] That's Dan dropping the DVD box.

Stuart Wellington

[8:29] Oh, Dan's picking up a slide whistle.

[8:31] Uh-oh.

[8:32] Don't open that closet.

Elliott Kalan

[8:33] Clang, clang, clump, clang, clang, clang.

[8:35] All right, guys.

[8:36] Woo!

[8:37] He's riding an elephant back.

Dan McCoy

[8:38] I've confirmed that it's called No Deposit.

Elliott Kalan

[8:41] Thanks for that Radius Audio Theater fact-checking session.

[8:44] So, Stuart, tell us the origin of No Deposit.

Stuart Wellington

[8:47] Okay, now, I have been accused in the past of having a suspect memory.

[8:54] And I think this story is going to be probably the same as all the other ones.

[8:59] So, please write in and tell me that I was wrong.

[9:02] But back in July, after one of our live shows, some fellows from Canada came up and talked

[9:10] to me.

[9:11] Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas.

[9:12] I can only assume.

[9:14] In disguise?

[9:15] Yeah, yeah.

[9:16] They were not wearing their trademark toques, drinking their Elsinore beer.

[9:21] And they were, these two guys came up and had some very nice things to say about the show.

[9:29] They said they were involved in the film industry.

[9:30] And they also stuffed a DVD.

[9:33] In your pants.

[9:34] In my pants.

[9:34] And I'm like, hey, guys, hands off the merchandise.

[9:37] And then I rolled some dice on the floor.

[9:40] And then, so, they, and they explained.

[9:45] It's like a real goon show turn.

[9:47] Yeah.

[9:48] So, they explained the, that this movie is this, like, passion project not unlike one

[9:54] of your fateful findings.

[9:55] One of your The Rooms.

[9:57] And they explained some other stuff that I, I kind of just tuned out.

[10:01] Because I was riding high having just done a show with my favorite guys.

Dan McCoy

[10:05] Well, let's explain a little bit about it now.

[10:08] This is a, this is a Frank D'Angelo film.

Elliott Kalan

[10:11] Now, Frank D'Angelo may be familiar to our Canadian listeners.

[10:14] As an entrepreneur, he owns a company that has an energy drink.

[10:18] And for a while, he, I believe.

[10:22] Surge?

[10:22] I think it's Surge.

[10:23] Okay, that's a big one.

[10:23] But it's Canadian, so it's spelled S-E-R-G-E.

[10:26] And it's a French Canadian energy drink.

[10:28] But I don't know that it is Surge.

[10:29] But he's, he's a successful drink manufacturer.

[10:32] He had a brewery for a while, which failed.

[10:34] He has a band that's named after his brewery, which he sings in.

[10:38] And he's also.

[10:38] What's the name of the band?

[10:40] Steelback Brewery.

[10:40] Or the Steelback 2-4 or something like that.

[10:43] And, I think it's Steelback.

[10:45] And he also, I mean, we don't have to get into this.

[10:49] But it was like, we were watching the movie.

[10:51] And I'm like, this is crazy.

[10:51] The guy's starring in the movie.

[10:53] And he directs it and writes it.

[10:53] And he's terrible.

[10:54] And he's just some businessman.

[10:55] And then I'm looking him up on Wikipedia.

[10:57] And there's the part about his sexual assault charge that he had to face in court.

[11:00] And I'm like, this is less fun all of a sudden.

Dan McCoy

[11:02] Although it does explain why every woman in the film is a harpy, probably.

Elliott Kalan

[11:06] Oh, yeah.

[11:06] That's true.

[11:07] Except his loving girlfriend or wife.

[11:09] No wife.

[11:10] And he also hosts a talk show that he pays to air in Canada.

[11:15] What's the name of the talk show?

[11:16] The Being Frank Show.

[11:18] And so he's a guy who, like, has money and decided he wants to make movies.

[11:23] And he's made a couple now.

[11:24] And his trademark is that he hires real, relatively big-name actors to be them.

[11:30] Now, before you get into the big-name actors.

Stuart Wellington

[11:31] I mean, that's most Hollywood directors' trademark is hiring big-name actors.

[11:35] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[11:35] But not, usually your passion project guys who are totally outside the film industry, your

[11:40] Neil Breen's, if you will.

[11:41] They don't have the wherewithal to...

[11:43] But, like, this guy is, like, he's not as crazy as Neil Breen.

[11:50] Okay.

[11:50] It's like if Neil Breen was on meds, like, was taking his meds and had an accurate view

[11:57] of reality, except that he still thought he was a great artist and the greatest guy in

[12:00] human history, that's Frank D'Angelo.

Dan McCoy

[12:02] Okay.

[12:03] I want to note, before we get into the big stars...

[12:05] You want to note what love is?

[12:06] Mm-hmm.

[12:07] Yeah, I want to note what love is.

[12:10] That this, the movie is totally scored by Frank D'Angelo songs.

[12:15] And that the DVD, the Blu-ray that we were given has a copy of Frank D'Angelo's album

[12:22] titled Look Into the Stars.

[12:24] And it's accompanied by a photo of Frank D'Angelo that looks to have been taken about 20 years

[12:30] earlier than when this movie was made.

Elliott Kalan

[12:32] Now, Frank D'Angelo is a true auteur.

[12:34] He wrote the movie.

[12:35] He directed it.

[12:36] He stars in it.

[12:37] He cast it.

[12:38] He gave himself a story by credit, which seems redundant when he wrote the screenplay,

[12:43] too.

Stuart Wellington

[12:44] And just to point out, the soundtrack that is recorded by Frank D'Angelo, or I like to call

[12:49] him Frank Steely D'Angelo, because he provides some poppy, upbeat, jazzy little renditions

[12:57] of songs like Hallelujah, which is always great in a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[13:00] And Live and Let Die was credited at the end, but I don't remember hearing it.

Stuart Wellington

[13:03] Yeah, he must have disguised it really well in one of the earlier scenes.

Dan McCoy

[13:08] What I've always wanted was a jazzy, poppy, up-tempo version of Hallelujah, by the way.

Stuart Wellington

[13:14] Yeah, exactly.

[13:14] You're like, hmm, Kelsey Grammer's not available to sing this.

[13:18] I guess Frank D'Angelo's our next best bet.

Elliott Kalan

[13:21] But there were no stars in the heavens, or rather Toronto, the Toronto skies, because

[13:27] even though it's set in Brooklyn, it's very clearly not, aside from the huge swaths of

[13:31] stock footage of the Manhattan skyline that appears in the film.

[13:35] But there are all these stars.

[13:36] There's Paul Sorvino.

[13:38] There's Eric Roberts.

[13:39] There's Doris Roberts.

[13:40] And I have to assume what was one of her last roles before she passed.

[13:42] Who's there?

[13:43] Is that a Baldwin, I see?

[13:44] There's, well, we'll get to him.

[13:46] There's Robert Loja playing a Holocaust survivor, Michael Madsen.

[13:50] There's Margot Kidder, Daniel Baldwin playing the most anti-Semitic character I've seen in

[13:56] a film since Triumph of the Will.

[13:58] Yeah.

[13:58] There's Peter Coyote.

[14:00] There's all the, like...

[14:01] There's a real coyote?

[14:02] No, there isn't.

[14:03] A coyote from the Roadrunner cartoons?

[14:05] And I wanted to say that Dominique Swain is in it, but in the end credits, she's listed

[14:09] as Domeek Swain.

[14:10] So that's either a typo, or it's just someone who looks like Dominique Swain and has a very

[14:14] similar name.

Stuart Wellington

[14:15] It must have been really awkward at the flashy red carpet premiere where Dominique Swain

[14:19] showed up and they're like, I'm sorry, ma'am, you're not on the list.

Elliott Kalan

[14:22] Are you Domeek Swain?

[14:24] No, no, I'm Dominique Swain.

[14:25] Well, you're not in this film.

[14:27] But it's the story of two men, one who through hard times falls on the wrong side of the tracks

[14:34] and takes the wrong road, and one who is the greatest billionaire saint who ever lived,

Dan McCoy

[14:39] Frank D'Angelo.

[14:41] Although we assumed at the beginning of the movie that he was a mobster, just entirely based

[14:44] on the way he talked.

Elliott Kalan

[14:44] And look, he also sleeps wearing a platinum watch and platinum bracelets and a huge pinky

[14:50] ring.

[14:51] And gold chains.

[14:52] And gold chains.

[14:52] And like, where I'm from, New Jersey, a big pinky ring means you're either in the mob or you want

[14:58] people to think you're in the mob.

[14:59] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[15:00] Or you're Ringo Starr.

[15:02] Visiting.

Elliott Kalan

[15:03] I mean, he doesn't show up in New Jersey that often.

[15:05] New Jersey.

[15:06] I really wanted to have some of this pizza I've heard so much about.

[15:11] What else do you do in New Jersey?

[15:14] Pretty much it.

[15:15] You want to go to a diner?

[15:16] Sure.

[15:17] You got a lot of them here on your turnpike.

[15:21] You got to pay your dues if you want to play the blues.

[15:25] And where else do you pay your dues than in New Jersey?

[15:27] Yes.

[15:28] I decided to take the family down to Wildwood.

[15:32] Really?

[15:32] Okay.

[15:33] I mean, it seems like you could afford to go somewhere much, much greater than that.

[15:36] Couldn't take a swing by Sandy Hook.

[15:39] Said Sandy Hook, but he's English.

[15:40] I didn't get to be a beetle by throwing my money around.

[15:43] Maybe some guys can live like there's no tomorrow, John Lennon.

[15:46] But I can't.

[15:47] That was really tasteless of you, Ringo.

[15:49] That was a friend of yours.

[15:51] Killed way before his time.

[15:53] Well, if you got to laugh about it, huh?

[15:55] I'm the one who's living off of his royalties.

[15:57] Ringo.

[15:58] This is a side of you I never wanted to see.

[16:01] This is a dark star indeed.

Dan McCoy

[16:05] Love you, Ringo Starr.

[16:07] You're a good treasure.

Elliott Kalan

[16:08] So I decided to go down to Oboken and see Frank Sinatra's birth house.

[16:13] Other words that start with H, so I don't have to pronounce it.

Stuart Wellington

[16:18] Now, this movie begins with information about the housing crisis recited by a Barack Obama sound-alike.

[16:27] That's up to debate.

Elliott Kalan

[16:29] This is a controversy that's been raging since the film started.

[16:33] Just because the sound-alike was so terrible.

[16:35] And we're given no in-film evidence except that he refers to himself as a leader and says he won't let it happen again.

[16:42] The fact is that also, like, Barack Obama's a real president who made real speeches.

[16:46] I don't remember him ever making that speech.

[16:48] I don't, like...

[16:49] No.

[16:49] It's not, I don't...

[16:50] And Barack Obama doesn't show up as a character in the film.

Stuart Wellington

[16:53] So are you saying that filmmakers never take historical liberties with things that, well, world leaders say?

Elliott Kalan

[16:59] Yeah, that's what I'm saying, Stuart.

[17:01] Okay, just writing this down in my Elliot journal.

[17:03] That's exactly what I'm saying.

[17:04] The rules that Elliot lives by.

[17:05] But, okay, so we're given probably, what, five straight minutes, six straight minutes?

[17:09] Yeah.

[17:09] Of stock footage of New York and just economic calamity.

[17:14] Yeah, graphs going down.

[17:15] Homeless people, yeah, animated graphs going down.

[17:17] Foreclose signs being slapped on buildings.

[17:20] While we hear this, like, speech by possibly Barack Foe-Bama.

[17:25] Oh, good one.

[17:26] People in barrels selling apples.

[17:29] Mm-hmm.

[17:29] Blind man with a cup full of pencils on a street corner.

[17:32] Yeah, yeah, of course.

[17:33] Stock broker throws himself out a window and lands on a couple doing the Charleston.

[17:38] And they're stuffing themselves in a phone booth.

[17:40] Flag bowl sitting.

[17:41] Yeah, sitting at the flag bowl.

[17:44] I was hoping...

[17:45] Now, is that a bowl of flags?

[17:46] I was hoping you wouldn't know that.

[17:47] Or is that, like, the Super Bowl, but it's flag ball?

Stuart Wellington

[17:50] Yeah.

[17:51] It's a good question.

[17:53] It's a good question.

[17:54] Because, like, the Orange Bowl is a football game where they play with oranges and some balls.

Elliott Kalan

[17:58] It's a good ball.

Dan McCoy

[17:59] Very messy.

[18:00] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[18:02] They've got to stop the plays all the time because the balls have been squeezed too hard and just exploded.

[18:05] Yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[18:06] So the movie starts with this guy, D'Angelo.

Elliott Kalan

[18:10] We're set up to feel like this is going to be a real indictment of the housing crisis.

[18:14] Yeah.

[18:14] This is about people who really are having trouble.

[18:16] He's got a lot of big ideas in his mind.

[18:18] He's tying it into real-world current events.

Stuart Wellington

[18:20] I was expecting, you know, Steve Carell with a wacky haircut to show up and start shouting at bankers.

Elliott Kalan

[18:27] Christian Bale would just be listening to Metallica while he drums on his desk.

[18:30] Now, this takes place after the housing crisis, as shown by the opening.

[18:34] And yet, later we see Dominique Swain smoking in a bar, which has been illegal in New York since well before 2008.

[18:41] Stuart, you're a barkeep.

[18:43] How do you explain this?

[18:44] You're a tavern owner.

[18:45] Well, that's the thing.

Stuart Wellington

[18:45] Like, you can tell that the bartender, and I'm hoping bar owner Paul Sorvino in this movie.

Elliott Kalan

[18:51] That would be really sad if he didn't.

Stuart Wellington

[18:52] Yeah, that he's like.

Elliott Kalan

[18:53] If Paul Sorvino was just a bar back.

Stuart Wellington

[18:56] Yeah, yeah.

[18:56] This is his, he just works the day shift because he's not ready for the prime time.

[19:02] Well, the thing is that, as you can see, his only customers are these people.

[19:05] So he's like, I gotta, you know, I gotta cater to my regulars.

[19:08] Gotta bend the rules.

Elliott Kalan

[19:09] So, we're introduced into the world of Eric Roberts, who's a banker.

[19:15] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[19:16] Who is telling.

[19:16] Who's at work at 5.50 in the morning.

Elliott Kalan

[19:19] It doesn't, he's talking to Michael Parry from Streets of Fire.

[19:22] Yeah.

[19:23] Who is, you average every man who has the hair of a man in his 30s, even though the rest of

[19:28] him is clearly not.

[19:28] Shows up wearing a 30-year-old's wig.

[19:30] Yeah.

[19:31] Michael, here's, Michael Parry's character is this.

[19:33] Acid watch jeans, too.

[19:34] He's this put-upon-every-man who dresses like he's our age, a little younger, and we're

[19:39] all in our mid to late 30s, and has a wife and a very young child who's maybe about two

[19:45] years old, who is an enormous child, like enormous baby.

[19:48] This is the biggest goddamn baby I've ever seen.

Stuart Wellington

[19:51] He's wearing these fucking blue jeans where I'm like, I saw the tag on those things.

[19:55] I'm like, those are bigger than my blue jeans.

Elliott Kalan

[19:58] These blue jeans have about 40 waist.

[20:00] But he's a, but so this, we're supposed to believe he's a man down in his life.

[20:04] He's a man down in his life.

Elliott Kalan

[20:16] And we know it's early in the morning because Eric Roberts interrupts this appointment to call another client and wakes the client up because it's 5.55 a.m.

[20:24] So maybe this is one of those banks that's open early for people who have to go to work.

[20:28] I don't understand.

[20:29] You know, like certain doctor's offices are like that.

[20:31] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[20:34] I mean, like I can almost understand him like calling someone that early in the morning if it's really important.

[20:40] Maybe.

[20:40] But I can't understand him interrupting another like meeting with a bank person who has come in.

Stuart Wellington

[20:46] Making the appointment that early.

[20:48] Yeah.

[20:48] Because you look at Eric Roberts and you see a guy who's clearly like a consummate professional, never does anything erratically, certainly doesn't comb his hair like a crazy person.

[20:59] And loves to be up bright and early in the morning, I'm sure.

[21:02] But he.

Elliott Kalan

[21:03] I mean, we have to assume he did not go to bed.

[21:07] So he calls our Frank D'Angelo, the writer, director star who's in bed and tells him you have to come.

[21:14] Yeah, he's dripping with jewels and gems.

[21:17] You have to come down to.

[21:18] With jewels and gems.

[21:20] The classic of the French New Wave.

[21:22] He's dripping with posters, DVD copies, the original screenplay, stills from the lobby cards.

[21:28] He tells him, oh, your company is getting an $8 million payment.

[21:32] That's a lot of money.

[21:33] There's these new rules.

[21:34] You have to come down and sign for it yourself.

[21:36] But you have six to seven days to do it.

[21:38] That's why I'm calling you so early in the morning.

[21:40] He then hangs up and then turns to his client and says, you haven't met your payments.

[21:45] We're taking your house away.

Dan McCoy

[21:47] He's like, I just wanted to do that call in the middle to really rub it in that other people have more money than you.

[21:52] Just to show you.

[21:53] What a power move.

Elliott Kalan

[21:54] This guy's got so much money.

[21:55] He'll just stop by in a week maybe to pick up $8 million.

Stuart Wellington

[21:58] What's great is he calls this Frank D'Angelo's character, Jimmy Valenti.

[22:04] He calls him.

[22:06] Jack Valenti.

[22:07] He doesn't answer right away.

[22:09] He and his wife argue about how tired they are.

[22:11] It's too early.

[22:12] They're not going to pick up the phone.

[22:13] They argue for a while.

Dan McCoy

[22:13] And then Eric Roberts is like, you know what?

[22:15] I'm just going to give him another shot.

[22:18] And he calls him a second time.

Stuart Wellington

[22:20] And it finally gets him on the phone.

[22:22] And there we see our director.

[22:23] The first shot of him is lying in bed with the camera pointed directly up his nostrils.

Elliott Kalan

[22:28] And also, the first two scenes with this character, he talks to Eric Roberts on the phone.

[22:34] Then he calls an employee of his to tell him he has to go down and sign this thing.

[22:38] Our director does not open his eyes, I think, once the entire time.

[22:42] He is sleeping through the starring role in his own film.

Stuart Wellington

[22:46] Yeah, I mean, he's so into it.

[22:49] He's so kind of locked in and keyed in.

Elliott Kalan

[22:51] Yeah, and I guess it also shows us that he doesn't sweat the small stuff.

[22:53] He isn't going to let this ruin his sleep.

[22:55] Because here's the thing.

[22:57] He dresses like a gangster.

[22:59] He wears these big pinky rings, black leather jacket over black t-shirt with black pants.

[23:03] His wife tells him, oh, I bought you a nice suit.

[23:05] He goes, ah, that's not what I wear.

[23:07] Ba-da-ba-da-ba.

[23:08] And he's driving around.

[23:09] Everything about him screams mobster.

[23:11] And I thought, okay, this is going to be a movie about a mobster who's breaking the law and succeeding.

[23:16] And an ordinary Joe who's trying to play by the rules and is failing to show that the system is rigged.

[23:21] Au contraire.

[23:22] It turns out that he is not a mobster.

[23:24] He is a successful businessman who's also the greatest man in the world.

[23:27] We'll get to that.

[23:27] Yes.

Stuart Wellington

[23:28] He's a man who only eats one big meal a day, he says.

Elliott Kalan

[23:33] And he likes, and it's made very clear when he meets with his executives in what is certainly not the only free room in an office space.

Dan McCoy

[23:41] It's clearly like, I mean, like it might be his office space because it's all, I mean, like if it's not.

[23:46] His products are all over the walls.

Elliott Kalan

[23:48] Yeah, his products are all over the walls.

[23:49] It's all energy drinks on the walls.

[23:50] But those could be his character's products.

[23:51] A lot of this movie also we should mention was shot clearly in a hotel lobby, hotel restaurant, and hotel banquet room.

[24:00] And hotel, it's like, it's very poorly disguised.

Stuart Wellington

[24:03] Are you talking about how the New York Police Department seems to share an office with like a marketing company or something?

Elliott Kalan

[24:10] And interrogates people at what is clearly the breakfast buffet area of the hotel.

[24:15] That the bank and also his wife's tea room that she goes to visit appear to be the same banquet hall in the hotel.

[24:25] Everywhere looks like lobbies.

Stuart Wellington

[24:27] I mean, his boardroom where this, you know, like very wealthy guy doesn't worry about money.

[24:33] The boardroom for his company, which is a very large building with a name that is, I mean, it's so high tech that they literally have the name like drawn on in Photoshop.

[24:42] They CGI the name in.

[24:45] His boardroom has like a cork board in it.

Elliott Kalan

[24:50] With printouts that say like Salesforce winner 2014.

[24:56] Just, just up on it.

[24:58] It's, it's a real mix of what we're supposed to be taking from the film and what we're actually taking from the film.

[25:03] But anyway, so while Frank D'Angelo is, is riding high, except he's got to go through the trouble of the, uh, has to go through the trouble of signing for this payment of $8 million.

[25:15] This other guy, what was his name?

[25:17] Nicky?

[25:18] Nicky.

[25:18] Nicky Ryan.

[25:19] Nicky Ryan.

[25:20] Michael Parade.

[25:21] Nicky Ryan.

[25:22] He can't find work.

[25:23] He can't afford his house.

[25:25] His wife hates him.

[25:26] She screams at him to get to the baby.

[25:28] The baby loves him because he's great.

Stuart Wellington

[25:29] She's like many women in this movie, has a nightstand covered in empty booze bottles.

Elliott Kalan

[25:33] Every, every woman except Frank D'Angelo's wife in this is an alcoholic, shrill harpy.

[25:38] Except for, uh, Frank D'Angelo's wife and the, uh, best-selling author slash expert on hostage situations who appears on the news later.

Dan McCoy

[25:46] Who can't seem to stop grinning while reporting on a hostage situation.

[25:49] But we'll get to that.

Elliott Kalan

[25:50] Dan, you had something I wanted to say.

[25:51] Is it about how Mickey can't even afford a hot dog with soda?

[25:55] He has to just get the hot dog?

[25:56] No.

[25:57] He can't afford to pay the extra dollar for a drink?

[25:59] No, I just say, but...

Stuart Wellington

[25:59] $4, dude, for a hot dog and a drink?

[26:02] That's fucking crazy.

[26:03] And he says, how much for the hot dog?

Elliott Kalan

[26:04] $3.

[26:05] $3 for a street hot dog?

[26:07] That should be a $2 dog.

[26:08] Yeah.

[26:08] We're in Toronto pretending to be New York.

[26:10] Now let me just say one thing.

[26:12] I recently paid $10 for a hot dog.

[26:14] It was at an airport.

[26:15] There's always a markup.

[26:17] I was like, you know what?

[26:18] I'm used to paying, you pay $15.

[26:20] Why are you eating a hot dog in an airport?

[26:21] Here's why.

[26:23] Because I got a hamburger.

[26:25] My son wanted a hot dog.

[26:27] This hot dog arrived.

[26:28] It was easily 15 inches long, and it was delicious.

[26:32] And so I'll tell you this.

Stuart Wellington

[26:34] So you're like, sir, I'd like to return this hamburger and pay the additional $3 to get the hot dog option.

Elliott Kalan

[26:40] Now you're going to refund me for the unused portion of this hamburger, correct?

[26:44] And I want you to apply that credit to the hot dog.

[26:46] I'll pay the rest.

[26:47] It'll be like a buck.

[26:48] So here's my tip for those who are interested.

[26:51] If you're ever in the Phoenix airport, just go ahead and get a hot dog.

[26:55] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[26:56] What was the purveyor of this hot meat?

[26:59] Don't remember.

[27:00] This hot beef injector.

[27:01] Oh, wow.

[27:01] Don't remember.

[27:02] It was just such sweet ambrosia, I couldn't hold it in my memory.

[27:05] Yeah, yeah.

[27:05] It's clouded, the memories.

Elliott Kalan

[27:06] So anyway, that was Elliot Kalin's hot dog adventure story.

Stuart Wellington

[27:10] The hot dog diaries.

Elliott Kalan

[27:13] I wrote that in an email and sent it to David Hot Dog Coveney.

[27:18] And he reads it while walking a hot dog on a leash.

Stuart Wellington

[27:21] Yeah, because his character in that show is David Red Shoe Coveney.

Dan McCoy

[27:28] You don't know that it isn't.

[27:29] So Dan, you wanted to say something about Mickey, our downtrodden hero.

[27:32] No, all I wanted to say was like, he's got a great head of hair.

[27:36] His wife has no sympathy for him in this eviction process.

[27:41] She blames him.

[27:42] She's a loser.

[27:42] Yeah.

[27:43] Well, this is just like, this is what I wanted to say.

[27:45] Everybody in Mickey's life appears to blame him for his misfortune.

[27:50] Yeah.

[27:50] Now, we don't know whether he deserves that.

[27:52] There's no backstory.

Elliott Kalan

[27:53] And we know that at least at one point he was financially supporting his brother and his brother's wife.

[27:57] Which we find out later.

Stuart Wellington

[27:58] At first we see him as just like a loser.

Elliott Kalan

[28:01] His brother who seems to be allergic to shirts.

[28:04] Oh boy.

Dan McCoy

[28:05] And if there's one guy who should be wearing a shirt, he's this guy.

[28:08] I've never, like, this might be a harsh indictment of Hollywood's beauty standards, but I've never seen as big a pot belly in a film.

Elliott Kalan

[28:17] I mean, that was not a pot belly.

[28:19] Yeah, yeah.

[28:19] That was a cauldron belly.

[28:20] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[28:22] It was barrel chested and that barrel was bulging.

[28:26] It was a bit, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[28:28] Botulism barrel.

Elliott Kalan

[28:28] You could have hollowed out that barrel chest and put it on you because you're poor and you lost everything in the stock market crash.

Stuart Wellington

[28:34] The casting notes say toad-like.

[28:36] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[28:38] Now I feel like we've gone too far.

Stuart Wellington

[28:41] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[28:42] So the thing is that.

[28:43] We're looking for a middle-aged man actor for this role.

[28:48] Description, if the lead boss bad guy from Super Mario 2 was a person.

[28:54] Sort of a King Hippo type.

[28:57] Okay, we're going too far.

[28:58] Okay.

[28:59] He's had a long acting career.

Stuart Wellington

[29:01] And like his wife, she says, you know, your son's never going to grow up to be like you, which is like, no shit, he's already fully grown.

[29:08] She's going to leave him and not share the circus earnings of her giant baby man.

[29:13] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[29:16] So the only place Mickey can find solace is at Alfie's, Paul Sorvino's bar, where the only other customers seem to be Dominique Swain as...

Dan McCoy

[29:25] As girl who just stands in front of the jukebox all the time.

Elliott Kalan

[29:29] As hussy number one.

[29:30] She's Michael Madsen's girlfriend, I guess.

[29:32] Michael Madsen, who's playing the part of low-life sleazebag.

[29:36] And Daniel Baldwin, who is playing the most anti-Semitic character I've seen in any movies that's not about World War II or about skinheads in years.

Stuart Wellington

[29:49] When you're watching one of these cash grab performances, you're assuming like they're in and out.

[29:54] They're just doing it for the bucks.

[29:56] But it feels like Daniel Baldwin's like, okay, sure, yeah, what do you want me to say?

[30:01] I'll say that for money.

Elliott Kalan

[30:02] Call Jewish people, what, lampshades?

[30:05] That's insane.

[30:05] He talks about how he says, what comes between Monday and Wednesday?

[30:10] Jews' day.

[30:10] That's when they take everything from you.

[30:12] These Jews running the banks, stealing everything from us.

[30:15] And it's like, wow.

[30:17] He throws the K word around a bunch of times.

[30:19] It's like...

Dan McCoy

[30:19] I don't even remember.

[30:22] Maybe it's just because they don't hang out with a bunch of anti-Semites in bars.

[30:25] You haven't lived, man.

[30:27] I don't remember the financial crisis being blamed specifically on the Jewish people.

Elliott Kalan

[30:32] I mean, I'm sure anti-Semites did.

[30:35] There were a lot of Jewish people involved in those companies.

[30:37] I mean, Lehman Brothers is a Jewish name, you know, not brothers.

Stuart Wellington

[30:40] Yeah, I mean, anti-Semitic people blamed the delay of the video game No Man's Sky on the Jewish people.

[30:46] All right.

Elliott Kalan

[30:47] But yeah, but that was because the Domanskiewicz family sued them for a piece of the action.

[30:53] But it comes out of nowhere.

[30:55] And it's like, wait, I thought this movie was going to be about the financial crisis.

[30:58] I didn't know it was going to be about racism.

[30:59] Yeah.

[31:00] And Daniel Baldwin really throws himself into this anti-Semitic part.

[31:04] It's very weird.

Stuart Wellington

[31:06] And he looks enough like Alec Baldwin that if you kind of squint your eyes a little bit, you could imagine Alec Baldwin saying that.

[31:11] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[31:12] And like, I don't think the believer had this much open anti-Semitism in it.

Dan McCoy

[31:16] I'd also like to point out that Michael Madsen and Daniel Baldwin are wearing the same shirts in two successive scenes that are supposed to take place on different days.

[31:24] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[31:24] That's why they're super low lives, dude.

[31:26] Yeah.

[31:26] They only have two shirts.

[31:27] You know why?

[31:28] Because the Jews took the other ones.

[31:29] Like Shirley Brown.

[31:29] Jewish tailors won't charge in too much for shirts.

[31:32] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[31:34] So, yeah.

[31:36] So also that scene featured Dominique Swain playing the jukebox.

[31:40] We'd seen her earlier in a scene where she had super weird interactions throwing herself at Jimmy Valenti at one point.

[31:48] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[31:48] So Jimmy Valenti is driving down the street.

[31:50] He gets out and he accidentally bumps into Mickey and knocks him down.

[31:54] Once again, their paths cross.

[31:55] Yeah.

[31:56] It's like a Dickens novel.

[31:57] Yeah.

[31:57] And so he helps him up.

[31:58] Hey, man, you okay?

[32:00] You look like you got the weight of the world on your shoulders.

[32:02] All right.

[32:02] We'll be good.

[32:03] Thus establishing he cares about everybody he sees.

[32:07] Yeah, yeah.

[32:07] He's just such a sweet man.

[32:08] He's got such an open heart.

Dan McCoy

[32:09] That and like in his business meeting, he's like very keen on telling the people like whatever charity we give to, I want to make sure that the money goes to the actual people and not the administrative costs.

[32:21] 80 to 90 percent.

Elliott Kalan

[32:22] And the guy who is handling the charity just keeps saying, I know that's how you roll, Jimmy.

[32:26] So that's, yeah, that's the thing.

[32:27] I took care of it.

[32:28] I know how you roll.

[32:30] So, and it is like a deal.

[32:31] He's trying that out.

[32:32] It's like an older white man.

Stuart Wellington

[32:33] He showed up to work and he's like, I'm going to try and be a little hipper and maybe Jimmy will recognize that.

Elliott Kalan

[32:39] I like this new thing that kids are saying, how you roll.

[32:42] Because it's like that's, you know what?

[32:44] I like a good roll.

[32:46] Sometimes, let me just be honest.

[32:48] True confessions here.

[32:49] I'm like, okay, father, I've sinned.

[32:50] When I go to the restaurant, sometimes what I'm really looking forward to is the roll.

[32:55] Not even the main course.

[32:56] Or the dessert.

[32:57] It's crazy, I know.

[32:58] But that's just how I roll.

[33:00] I'm going to use it in the meeting tomorrow, okay, honey?

[33:01] And his wife is like, go to bed.

[33:04] It's three in the morning.

[33:05] Please stop.

Dan McCoy

[33:06] Stop talking about rolls.

Elliott Kalan

[33:08] Every night with the rolls.

[33:09] This will be the one time in the movie that a woman is justifiably angry at the man.

[33:13] Let me go to bed.

[33:15] Stop talking about rolls.

[33:17] So he's just a sweetheart.

[33:18] He's just a honey pie.

[33:20] And long story short, Mickey stays with his brother.

[33:26] And his brother's wife says, I want that loser out of my fucking house.

[33:29] He's a fucking loser.

[33:30] You're a fucking loser.

[33:31] He's a piece of shit.

Stuart Wellington

[33:32] This is in a great scene in a bedroom.

[33:34] That's where we're introduced to the idea that this movie's like, these characters are just not going to wear very many clothes.

Elliott Kalan

[33:40] No.

Stuart Wellington

[33:41] Get used to it, buddy.

Elliott Kalan

[33:42] The brother, who's an older gentleman, is just sitting there in almost no clothes.

[33:46] And so the next day he says, you've got to leave.

[33:48] She doesn't want you here.

[33:49] And Mickey's like, I supported you for two years.

[33:51] Now you're throwing me out.

[33:53] And so he's got no choice.

[33:56] The only people who care about him are Michael Madsen and Daniel Baldwin.

Stuart Wellington

[34:00] Why did they, why was the brother character shirtless in that scene?

Elliott Kalan

[34:04] This is the morning.

Stuart Wellington

[34:06] I mean, he couldn't just toss one on.

[34:08] I mean, if you're going to be throwing somebody out, like you're going to have that kind of hard conversation.

[34:11] You don't want to like throw something over.

Dan McCoy

[34:12] I don't know, sometimes when I will go over to your house, you're wandering around in your underwear.

Stuart Wellington

[34:16] Yeah, but that's, I guess that's the same thing.

[34:17] It's a power play.

[34:19] Like you want to show off.

[34:20] You want to be like, who's the big guy around here?

Elliott Kalan

[34:23] It's an intimidation technique.

[34:24] The way like Lyndon Johnson would call people into the bathroom with him.

[34:27] You'd think that would put him in the shameful position.

[34:30] No, no, no.

[34:31] He's making you feel uncomfortable.

[34:33] So what his brother Joe was saying is, hey, this is me.

[34:38] This is me naked to the world.

[34:40] And you know what?

[34:41] That should make me vulnerable, but it makes you uncomfortable.

[34:44] I'm comfortable with my body.

[34:46] All of it.

[34:46] You're the one who's not comfortable with it.

[34:48] Shame on you.

[34:49] Get out of my house because my wife told me you have to leave.

Dan McCoy

[34:53] But his sister-in-law is another person calling Mickey a loser.

[34:56] We also get Mickey's mom calling him a loser.

Elliott Kalan

[34:58] He goes to a bingo parlor where his mom, Margot Kidder, is playing bingo with Doris Roberts.

[35:04] And he asks for her for help and she refuses.

[35:07] Doris Roberts has a heartbreaking monologue about how her son died of heroin.

[35:11] Died of suicide after a heroin addiction.

[35:13] Which he repeats twice.

[35:14] Once with Margot Kidder out of the room and once with her back in the room.

[35:19] So he's got nowhere to turn except these two anti-Semites.

[35:22] He joins their group.

[35:23] He doesn't get his head totally shaved, but he gets a buzz cut.

Stuart Wellington

[35:26] It's this great transformative moment where we are greeted to flashbacks to scenes from earlier in the movie.

[35:33] Oh, yeah.

[35:33] Just over and over.

[35:34] Pow, pow, pow, pow.

[35:34] I forgot about that.

Elliott Kalan

[35:35] Just like Sidney Lumet, pawnbroker, the devil knows you're dead.

[35:41] What was that movie?

[35:42] Before the devil knows you're dead.

[35:43] Before the devil knows you're dead style where it's just like pop, pop, shots from the past, shots from the past.

Dan McCoy

[35:47] But it's like they're all like these gauzy, like it's like a early 90s R&B music video.

[35:54] Well, because that's what the music is when it comes in.

[35:57] Then there's some kind of love song, right?

[35:59] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[36:00] The love song from No Deposit.

[36:02] The love theme from No Deposit.

Stuart Wellington

[36:03] It sounds like the kind of love song you would hear in an 80s action movie that's clearly like kind of from the 50s or 60s.

[36:11] And you're like, I guess cool people listen to this when they're like about to hook up.

Elliott Kalan

[36:15] But he's getting his head shaved and a tattoo put on his neck.

Stuart Wellington

[36:17] Yeah, they call a tattoo artist in for some reason.

[36:20] Into the bar.

[36:22] That's got to be against health code.

Elliott Kalan

[36:24] I would have to assume so.

[36:25] I mean, there's blood coming out of his body in a place that people are ingesting drinks.

[36:29] So Paul Servino, he already lets people smoke in there.

[36:31] He doesn't care about the rules.

[36:32] He doesn't care.

Stuart Wellington

[36:32] Well, that's the thing.

[36:33] He's got to keep his regulars happy.

Elliott Kalan

[36:35] Yeah.

[36:36] And so they instantly go – he instantly goes from just a normal guy down on his luck to a skinhead who is robbing a bank with Michael Madsen and Daniel Baldwin.

[36:44] That bank, full of Jewish people.

[36:46] Yep.

[36:47] Very Jewish.

Stuart Wellington

[36:48] And it's very clearly in like the conference center of a large or to mid-sized hotel.

Elliott Kalan

[36:54] Ironically, this movie that was trying to make a stance against anti-Semitism was doing something anti-Semitic itself by taking up a ballroom that should have had a bar mitzvah in it.

[37:03] Yeah.

[37:04] Some unlucky Toronto Jewish boy had to have his bar mitzvah at the synagogue because they couldn't rent the event space at the local Hilton Honors Hotel, I'm guessing.

Dan McCoy

[37:16] I'm very mixed up about what the movie's feelings about the Jewish people are.

Elliott Kalan

[37:22] Because they're only shown in banks?

Dan McCoy

[37:26] Yeah.

[37:26] I mean, I think that we're supposed to not sympathize with the anti-Semitic talk.

[37:31] But at the same time, it's not really refuted particularly strongly either.

[37:36] Well, I feel like the movie doesn't really need to refute that.

Elliott Kalan

[37:38] I guess.

[37:39] I don't think the movie needs to show a Jewish person being great so that the audience is like, oh, Daniel Baldwin was wrong about that.

Dan McCoy

[37:46] But like, Jews aren't evil.

[37:47] Our hero doesn't even turn around.

[37:48] He's just like, at the end of the movie, he's just like, I want to go home.

[37:52] I don't, you know, it's wrong to shoot people.

[37:54] He's a moron.

[37:55] Yeah.

[37:55] It is wrong.

[37:55] And you disagree with the message it's wrong to shoot people?

[37:58] Well, I don't think that it's particularly more wrong to shoot one type of person than another type of person.

[38:04] All Lives Matter.

Stuart Wellington

[38:05] Heard it here first.

[38:06] Wow.

[38:07] Wow, Dan.

[38:07] Wow.

[38:07] Jesus, dude.

[38:09] Oh, my God.

[38:10] Just rewind the tape.

[38:11] You know what?

[38:12] Delete it.

[38:12] Yeah.

[38:13] You've shown your true colors.

[38:14] The.

[38:15] All right.

[38:15] So this is where the confluence of events leads us to the ultimate showdown.

[38:20] Because Jimmy Valenti has shown up to the bank to pick up his $8 million.

[38:24] And.

[38:25] Or sign for it or something.

Elliott Kalan

[38:26] Just to sign the papers because apparently that's a thing you have to do now.

Stuart Wellington

[38:28] Eric Roberts comes out from behind the desk.

[38:30] Happy as a clam.

[38:31] He is jittery as hell.

[38:33] And he is walking like a man with one and a half legs.

Elliott Kalan

[38:38] That was that CBS sitcom, right?

[38:40] One and a half legs.

[38:41] Yeah.

[38:42] And.

[38:43] But that's when our villains walk in.

[38:46] Shoot a security guard in the head instantly.

[38:48] Immediately.

[38:48] Yeah.

[38:49] Immediately.

Stuart Wellington

[38:49] And actually what it looks like a pretty decent use of special effects.

[38:53] Yeah.

[38:53] That was a pretty good special effects.

[38:54] And they also wrap a giant length of chain around the doors.

[38:59] Which we later see does not prevent people from opening the door.

Elliott Kalan

[39:03] When the doors open from the outside later the chain falls off harmlessly.

[39:06] It sloughs off like a snake skin.

[39:08] Now we didn't mention that there's also two policemen.

[39:11] Who I think are both named Tony.

[39:13] Who are called in by.

Dan McCoy

[39:15] Introduced for no particular reason.

Elliott Kalan

[39:17] Called in by police chief Peter Coyote.

[39:19] Who tells them in his Ken Burns tones.

[39:22] That he knows they've been working really hard.

[39:25] He needs them to work another shift.

[39:26] Even though they're owed a day off.

[39:28] They've been working on the Fox case.

[39:30] For days.

[39:32] But the media is howling down his throat.

[39:34] And there's so much stuff going on in the city.

[39:35] That he needs them to work two more days.

[39:37] This is in his office in the police station.

[39:39] That as Stuart mentioned.

[39:40] Also has a business group of some kind sharing the office.

[39:43] And there's a poster in the hallway.

[39:44] That seems to be like either an ad.

[39:46] Or an employee of the month.

[39:47] Or something like that.

Stuart Wellington

[39:48] And judging by their accents.

[39:49] These two detectives just recently transferred from Saskatchewan.

Elliott Kalan

[39:53] Oh everyone in the movie.

[39:55] Except for the name stars.

[39:56] Is very much Brooklyn by way of Canada.

[39:59] Yeah.

[39:59] And it's.

[40:01] They're like what's the matter eh?

[40:03] Yeah.

[40:04] I was walking a boot here.

[40:07] Anyway.

[40:08] But that's besides what.

[40:09] So they're on.

[40:10] They.

[40:10] These guys take hostages at the bank.

[40:12] They especially don't like that the Jewish people are there.

[40:14] But then.

[40:15] The anti-Semitic stuff kind of takes a back seat.

[40:17] It doesn't really.

Stuart Wellington

[40:19] Appear that much.

[40:20] First the criminals.

[40:22] Knock Eric Roberts down.

[40:24] And kick him a bunch.

[40:24] And each time they hit him.

[40:26] They use foley effects of like eggs breaking.

[40:28] It's the craziest thing I've seen in a real movie.

Elliott Kalan

[40:31] It's like he's got empty.

[40:33] Like.

[40:34] He took a bunch of eggs.

[40:36] And pulled the yolk out without breaking the shell.

[40:39] And then stuffed it all in his pants.

[40:40] So that each kick is like crunch.

[40:44] Crunch.

Dan McCoy

[40:45] And.

[40:46] I mean there was still like a little Jewish stuff though.

[40:48] When like.

[40:49] Uh.

[40:49] Our hero.

[40:51] Our.

[40:52] Uh.

[40:53] The.

[40:53] Frank D'Angelo.

[40:54] Right.

[40:54] That's his name.

[40:55] Yeah.

[40:55] Jimmy Volante.

[40:56] Yeah.

[40:56] Uh.

[40:57] He.

[40:57] Uh.

[40:58] Gets shot by.

[41:00] Uh.

[41:00] One of the guys.

[41:01] When he's trying to defend a young girl.

[41:03] And.

[41:04] The.

[41:05] The granddaughter.

[41:05] The daughter I'm assuming.

Stuart Wellington

[41:06] Or possibly daughter.

[41:07] I don't know what kind of logic this movie is.

[41:09] Of Robert Loggia.

[41:10] Of Robert Loggia who is playing a Holocaust survivor.

[41:13] But.

Stuart Wellington

[41:13] But Mickey's like.

Dan McCoy

[41:14] What?

[41:15] He's not a Jew.

[41:16] We were.

[41:17] Like.

[41:17] He's like.

[41:18] He's like.

[41:18] We're here to shoot Jewish people.

Elliott Kalan

[41:20] Never forgot about that.

[41:22] No.

[41:22] So.

[41:22] Yeah.

[41:22] There.

[41:23] Robert Loggia.

[41:24] He goes.

[41:24] I've seen the devil.

[41:25] You're nothing.

[41:26] And he rolls up his sleeve.

[41:27] He's got numbers tattooed on his arm.

[41:29] He's a survivor.

[41:30] Mm-hmm.

[41:30] Now.

[41:30] I don't know if it's.

[41:32] Better or worse.

[41:33] That he does not attempt to do any sort of.

[41:35] Eastern European.

[41:36] Accent.

[41:37] Mm-hmm.

[41:37] He's.

[41:37] He's apparently a.

[41:38] Maybe he came over as a kid.

[41:40] Or a teenager.

[41:41] And he worked really hard.

[41:42] To get his accent away.

[41:44] Yeah.

[41:44] Because he was so traumatized.

[41:45] By his time in the camps.

[41:46] But.

[41:47] This.

Stuart Wellington

[41:47] He seems pretty comfortable with himself.

[41:50] And.

[41:51] Kind of self-assured.

[41:52] Like.

[41:53] I don't feel like he would try and.

[41:54] Hide anything.

Elliott Kalan

[41:55] I guess.

[41:55] I mean.

[41:55] There's.

Stuart Wellington

[41:56] There's no obfuscation with Robert Loggia's performance.

[41:58] I mean.

[41:58] But the confidence may come from.

Elliott Kalan

[41:59] The fact that he's like.

[42:00] I recreated myself in my life.

[42:01] And I didn't let that tragedy define me.

[42:03] Because if I've learned anything from the.

[42:05] From meeting Holocaust survivors.

[42:07] It's that.

[42:07] One.

[42:08] The Holocaust was terrible.

[42:09] And two.

[42:10] Okay.

[42:11] Either.

[42:12] I mean.

[42:12] There's.

[42:13] This is going to sound terrible.

[42:14] There's.

[42:14] Really.

[42:15] There's two types.

[42:15] Those who never want to talk about.

[42:16] And those who want to talk about nothing else.

[42:18] Okay.

[42:18] And there's.

[42:19] Two.

[42:19] There are people who are.

[42:20] Shattered by it.

[42:21] Mm-hmm.

[42:22] And then there are survivors.

[42:23] Who kind of seem to take confidence in a way from it.

[42:25] That like.

[42:26] I survived the worst possible thing.

[42:29] That could ever happen to a person.

[42:31] And that didn't destroy me.

[42:32] So I can handle anything.

[42:34] And so like.

[42:35] He's the second type.

[42:36] I guess.

[42:36] And that.

[42:37] He's like.

[42:38] I'm not going to let this bank robbery get to me.

[42:41] Yeah.

[42:41] Because I stared down Hitler.

[42:43] Yeah.

[42:43] Michael Madsen and one of the bald wins are not going to put me down.

[42:48] And they punch him.

[42:48] And he goes.

[42:49] You punch like a girl.

[42:50] Uh-huh.

[42:50] And later he gets the best line in the movie.

[42:52] Uh.

[42:53] After everything's been taken care of.

[42:54] He goes.

[42:56] Uh.

[42:57] Oh.

[42:57] So Frank D'Angelo gets shot.

[42:59] He recognizes that.

[43:00] Hey.

[43:00] This is the guy I picked up off the sidewalk before.

[43:03] Uh-huh.

[43:03] And.

[43:03] No.

[43:04] And the guy goes.

[43:04] Hey.

[43:05] He helped me.

[43:06] I'm going to take him in another room.

[43:07] They have a little heart to heart.

[43:08] Frank D'Angelo says I guess the moral of the movie.

[43:10] And that's the moment.

[43:10] It's nice to be great.

[43:11] But it's great to be nice.

Dan McCoy

[43:12] But that's the moment when the other bank robbers are like.

Stuart Wellington

[43:14] Oh yeah.

[43:15] Our possibly susceptible to coercion friend.

[43:18] We are able to turn to our cause in under a day.

[43:22] Yeah.

[43:22] Let's let him go in the other room with that incredibly handsome and charismatic wounded

[43:26] man.

[43:27] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[43:27] Uh.

[43:27] I mean.

[43:28] The handsome part.

[43:28] Uh.

Dan McCoy

[43:29] Super tall and wealthy.

[43:31] But I also just wonder what they're doing out there.

[43:33] Just like.

[43:33] All right.

[43:33] Well.

[43:34] You go in the back for a while.

[43:35] We'll just keep standing here with our guns.

Elliott Kalan

[43:36] Especially because they don't seem to want money.

[43:38] But then by this point the police are surrounding the bank.

[43:41] Yeah.

[43:41] And also.

Stuart Wellington

[43:42] There's a massive crowd forming between the bank and the expansive tree line of downtown

[43:47] Brooklyn.

Elliott Kalan

[43:49] Yeah.

[43:49] Downtown Brooklyn really seems to have a lot of wooded highway access.

Stuart Wellington

[43:53] It was interesting enough that it was in that crowd scene that I finally was like.

[43:57] Oh.

[43:58] There's a non-white person in Brooklyn apparently.

Dan McCoy

[44:01] Because the first people of color showed up.

[44:04] And meanwhile we're getting a lot of news reports from.

[44:07] What was the guy's name?

[44:08] Frank Ambrosio I think it was.

[44:11] Yeah.

[44:11] Frank Ambrosio.

[44:12] Ambrosio.

Elliott Kalan

[44:13] And his.

[44:14] And his.

Stuart Wellington

[44:15] It's Frank Ambrosio to his friends.

Elliott Kalan

[44:17] Yeah.

[44:17] And his.

[44:18] His reporter on the scene.

[44:19] Which his name I think was Fred Lepko.

[44:22] Matthew Lesko.

[44:23] And this is a movie where we see everything that's happening.

[44:26] We know the backstory of these characters.

[44:28] It cuts to a news break and we watch for a while for like three minutes a reporter explain

[44:33] that he doesn't really know what's going on with the situation.

[44:35] And we don't even see the reporter's face.

[44:36] Which is realistic.

Dan McCoy

[44:37] But we don't need to see that in a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[44:39] We're watching the anchor just listening to it and it's like did they want the audience

[44:42] to jump in and fill in the reporter on what's going on or.

Dan McCoy

[44:45] Yeah.

[44:45] Meanwhile all of the people in Mickey's life are watching this tragedy unfold on television.

Elliott Kalan

[44:53] His wife sees it at the fancy tea room where she's meeting her friend.

[44:56] His mom.

[44:57] Not Mickey's wife.

[44:57] Mickey's wife is at the circus with the giant baby.

[44:59] Mickey's wife is not interested.

[45:01] No.

[45:02] Frank's wife sees it.

[45:03] Mickey's mom sees it.

[45:05] Mickey's brother sees it.

[45:06] Which finally gives him the strength to stand up to his wife in the best scene in the movie.

[45:11] Yeah.

[45:11] He delivers the best line.

[45:12] I've said earlier Robert Loja the best line.

[45:14] I was wrong.

[45:15] Joe has the best line.

[45:17] His wife goes, your loser brother's robbing a bank.

[45:20] And she already said like, gay, go get me some more fucking vodka if you can handle that

[45:24] you loser.

[45:25] That's how she talks to him all the time.

[45:27] And he goes, what?

[45:28] My brother is in trouble robbing a bank?

[45:30] And Stuart, do you want to deliver his classic line?

Dan McCoy

[45:33] I think Dan wants to deliver it.

[45:34] Dan, I think.

[45:35] I don't know if I remember it exactly, but it was something like, I sold on my brother

[45:38] for pussy.

Stuart Wellington

[45:40] And you're a cunt.

[45:41] And you're a cunt.

[45:42] That's floating what he says.

[45:44] After he fucking spikes the vodka bottle on the ground, she's like, hey.

Elliott Kalan

[45:48] Dan, you might want to do an explicit language, a special warning on this.

[45:53] Yeah.

[45:53] Because that word, the c-word, is one I don't like to say.

[45:56] But it's hilarious.

[45:57] It escalates the movie suddenly to a, like, it goes from like 60 to 100.

[46:03] You're like, wait, what did he just say?

Stuart Wellington

[46:05] It would be terrible if some plucky listener took an audio clip of Dan saying that.

[46:10] No.

[46:10] And I don't know, turned it into something.

[46:11] Like a ringtone.

[46:13] Oh, boy.

Elliott Kalan

[46:13] And so the next time we see Joe, he's talking to a policeman again in the police station

[46:19] slash hotel restaurant.

[46:21] And he's establishing what we already know, that his brother lost everything.

[46:25] He lost his house.

[46:26] And the cop's like, wait, he lost his house?

[46:28] Mm-hmm.

[46:28] He lost his wife, his baby, his house.

[46:31] So they took his house away.

[46:32] He lost his house.

[46:33] His house.

[46:34] He lost it.

[46:35] They lost his house.

[46:36] Wait, where he lives with his family?

[46:38] It's like, the phrase, he lost his house, has spoken so many times.

[46:44] But back to the bank robbery.

[46:45] So to make a long story short.

Stuart Wellington

[46:46] But that conversation they're having in that breakfast nook, in that booth that they're

[46:51] sharing, that's apparently the hot box in the police department.

[46:55] That scene clearly shows this detective sitting down with the brother, and he's like, oh, wow,

[47:01] your brother's a bad guy.

[47:02] And then by the end of it, he's like, he lost his house?

[47:05] No, he's clearly a hero.

[47:07] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[47:09] Yeah, he turns around.

[47:10] Meanwhile, and I think that same policeman is also supposed to be at the bank at the

[47:13] exact same time.

[47:14] The SWAT team is there.

[47:15] They're next door to each other.

[47:17] The bank and the police station.

[47:18] Makes sense.

Stuart Wellington

[47:18] You want to put the bank somewhere safe.

[47:19] And the tea room is next door to that.

Elliott Kalan

[47:21] New York's really a small town.

Stuart Wellington

[47:23] And Alfie's Bar is right next to it.

[47:24] Just because Brooklyn.

[47:25] That's a neighborhood story.

Elliott Kalan

[47:26] Yeah, yeah, that's true.

[47:27] What neighborhood of Brooklyn was this, by the way?

Stuart Wellington

[47:31] You're going to say Borough Park, aren't you?

Dan McCoy

[47:33] It's whoosh doesn't exist.

[47:36] Yeah.

[47:37] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[47:38] Dragon Wick.

[47:41] Yeah.

[47:42] So, make a long story short about the heist, because the heist, the hostage situation is

[47:47] not actually that interesting, although it's pretty funny.

[47:49] But shooting happens.

[47:52] Mickey gets shot.

[47:54] Frank has already been shot through the shoulder.

[47:56] A guy who it turns out is...

[47:58] Frank D'Angelo playing Jimmy Villain.

[47:59] Oh, sorry.

[47:59] Jimmy is right.

[48:00] Yeah.

[48:00] It's so hard to tell him apart.

[48:02] Yeah.

[48:02] He's already established his bona fides.

[48:03] Where one begins and one ends.

[48:04] Where one begins and one ends.

[48:06] Because bona fides is a great man, because Mickey says, hey, let him go.

[48:09] You can go.

[48:10] And he goes, I could go.

[48:12] But my balls wouldn't come along for the ride, or something like that.

[48:15] He wouldn't be a man if he walked out of that situation.

[48:17] Yeah.

[48:17] And so, at the last moment, even though he's been shot in the shoulder, he uses that hand

[48:22] to pick up a gun and shoot the two robbers after they've already shot Mickey.

Stuart Wellington

[48:27] Yeah, there's a plainclothes cop there that tries to intercede, and Frank D'Angelo's

[48:31] character pulls him down so that he doesn't get shot, and then kills both bank robbers.

Elliott Kalan

[48:36] Now, not since The Taking of Pelham 1, 2, 3, my favorite movie, has there been a less

[48:39] effective undercover cop.

[48:41] He just jumps out, I'm a cop, and then immediately gets either shot or pulled to the ground.

[48:46] Jimmy Valenti slash Frank D'Angelo is a saint, is a hero.

[48:50] Robert Loja delivers what I thought was the first best line until I remember Joe's argument

[48:54] with his wife.

[48:55] The second best line of the movie, which is, bring a stretcher for this good man.

[49:01] Get garbage bags for these pieces of shit.

Dan McCoy

[49:05] And the hospital beds are wheeled out, and then...

[49:09] Everyone seems to have forgotten that Mickey was part of the hostage situation by this time,

[49:14] too.

[49:14] Yeah, and that's kind of...

[49:15] That's how they pitch it, though.

[49:16] Like, they, like, say, literally, they're like, these two guys fell as hostage.

[49:21] And they're like, I'm like, what do you mean, these two guys?

[49:23] There was a third man.

[49:25] Do-do-do-do-do-do.

[49:26] The third man.

[49:27] Yeah, there's a third school right here.

Elliott Kalan

[49:28] Another favorite of mine.

[49:30] Who knows?

[49:31] Because the more important thing is that these guys who both have been shot, they both need

[49:35] medical attention.

[49:36] Their stretchers are allowed to sit right outside the entrance of the bank while every character

[49:40] they know rushes through the police line and has a moment with them.

[49:42] Yeah.

[49:43] They allow Paul Sorvino, his bartender, to come up and have a little bedside moment with

[49:50] him.

Elliott Kalan

[49:50] And also, not his mom, but his mom's friend from the bingo parlor runs up to have a moment

[49:53] with him and tell her she loves him.

Dan McCoy

[49:55] Margot Kidder was in some bushes somewhere.

[49:57] She couldn't be bothered.

[49:58] Oh.

[49:59] Poor lady.

Stuart Wellington

[50:00] He sees the news story with those three guys robbing the bank.

[50:03] He was just kidding, Margot Kidder.

[50:05] Yeah.

[50:06] Oh, sorry.

[50:06] So Paul Sorvino sees this news story of these three guys having robbed the bank and he goes,

[50:11] you can see that look on his face where he's like, oh shit, they're my only customers.

Elliott Kalan

[50:16] I bet a curry favor with the only guy left.

Stuart Wellington

[50:18] With the only survivor.

Elliott Kalan

[50:19] Otherwise, it's just me and Dominique Swain.

[50:21] I'm sorry, Dominique Swain.

Stuart Wellington

[50:22] Yep.

[50:23] Who's playing some weird song in the jukebox and dancing along.

Elliott Kalan

[50:26] Now, also, this is all while Frank D'Angelo's cover of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah is playing.

[50:32] And a parade of Orthodox Jews walk out of the bank, I assume, thanking God that a man like

[50:38] Jimmy Valenti was created.

Stuart Wellington

[50:40] And it's thanks to Watchmen that this is the second worst use of that song in a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[50:47] And after that, that's pretty much it.

Dan McCoy

[50:50] There's no coda or anything.

[50:54] Oh, I remember what it was.

[50:56] Jimmy, like, asks, he's being wheeled out, tells Eric Roberts to pay off, that he's going

[51:01] to pay off.

[51:01] Right.

[51:02] Mickey's house.

[51:03] More ditch.

[51:04] And it's just like, well, that's a nice gesture, but Mickey's clearly going to jail for a very

[51:08] long time.

[51:09] Yeah, sure.

[51:10] I don't know why.

Stuart Wellington

[51:10] I mean, he suggested that he'll also pay for his legal fees, but that doesn't, that's

[51:15] not going to help the fact that, like, he still doesn't have a job.

[51:18] He still, I mean, is pretty easily convinced into doing bad things.

[51:23] Like, he has a neck tattoo now.

[51:24] Like, that doesn't go away.

[51:25] That's permanent, dude.

[51:26] I mean, you can get those removed.

Elliott Kalan

[51:27] I assume Jimmy's going to pay that bill also.

Stuart Wellington

[51:30] He's going to pay to get his neck tattoo removed?

[51:31] He's going to adopt him.

Elliott Kalan

[51:33] Now he's his ward.

[51:34] At that point, he's just going to be, we already think that Jimmy has like a driver slash gopher

[51:38] who's obsessed with keeping Jimmy's car clean.

[51:40] And when he goes up to him, he says, I apologize.

[51:43] I didn't have a chance to clean the car.

[51:45] I expected him to just pull out his sword and commit seppuku right there in front of him.

[51:49] Yeah.

[51:49] He is so apologetic because I guess.

Stuart Wellington

[51:51] Well, and he is wearing, he is wearing a ponytail.

[51:53] So you assume that he's way into Highlander, the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[51:57] You have to assume like Jimmy Valenti is such a living saint.

[52:00] People love him so much that when they fail him, even in the slightest, it, they hurt.

[52:05] It hurts them.

[52:05] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[52:06] All their misdeeds are reflected upon them like the penance stare.

Elliott Kalan

[52:09] Yeah, like Ghost Rider.

[52:11] So they, when he's told that he has to go sign for this loan and he goes to, not loan,

[52:16] this payment, and he goes to his office, they go, oh yeah, these new rules, payroll should

[52:21] have dealt with it, but they didn't.

[52:23] He goes, hey, everyone makes mistakes.

[52:25] Don't yell at payroll about it.

[52:26] Don't make them feel bad.

[52:27] We'll just send out a memo saying these are the rules now.

[52:30] Tell them about my charity.

[52:31] So like that's, he's just the sweetest boss in the world.

[52:34] And the moral of the story is that Frank D'Angelo, by extension, must be a great man.

[52:38] And the moral of the story is you should go out and watch this movie.

Stuart Wellington

[52:41] Just watch it.

[52:41] If you want to watch this crazy passion project that is a love letter to himself.

Dan McCoy

[52:47] And the movie ends with a bunch of slow-mo black and white sequence, shots of all the

[52:53] characters, all the big stars that we've seen in the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[52:56] He may have gone out of his way to find the least flattering picture of almost all of them.

[53:00] Eric Roberts is him, like crying with blood dripping out of his nose.

Stuart Wellington

[53:04] Yeah, crawling around on the floor, mourning the loss of his testicles.

[53:10] Whereas the picture of Frank D'Angelo in there is beatific almost.

[53:14] Oh, yes.

[53:14] Like Peter Paul Rubens painted this shit.

Dan McCoy

[53:18] Yeah.

[53:18] So we should do our final judgments about this movie, whether it's a good, bad movie, a bad,

[53:23] bad movie, or a movie you kind of like.

[53:25] Is there any doubt?

[53:26] Stu, I feel like you.

Stuart Wellington

[53:27] This is a good, great movie.

[53:29] This is a movie where the financier of the movie, the writer, director, star, not only

[53:36] plays this awesome businessman, but he also, I think, gets approached while on a stretcher

[53:41] having been shot by the chief of police who basically is like, you want the key to the

[53:45] city and you can be chief of police if you want because you're the best shot I've ever

[53:49] seen.

Elliott Kalan

[53:51] Yeah.

[53:51] It's great.

[53:52] And he acts like a gangster, dresses like a gangster.

[53:55] No.

[53:55] Turns out, he's the best of us.

Stuart Wellington

[53:57] You start watching this movie and you're like, okay, this is pretty slow.

[54:00] And you know, it takes a little bit of time before it starts cooking.

[54:03] Oh, boy.

[54:04] That's sweet.

Dan McCoy

[54:04] That first five minutes of info dump.

[54:06] That's something that we didn't mention is that the movie takes a really long time to

[54:10] set up everything before the hostage situation.

[54:14] And the hostage situation starts and is resolved in like half an hour.

[54:17] Oh, boy.

Elliott Kalan

[54:18] When that pot gets boiling.

[54:19] Yum, yum, yum.

[54:20] And this is an 80 minute movie, right?

[54:22] Yeah.

[54:22] That's the other thing we should mention.

[54:24] Go watch this movie.

[54:26] You have 80 minutes, I'm sure.

[54:28] What are you up to?

[54:29] Block out an hour and a half for it and then spend the last 10 minutes masturbating in joy

[54:33] that such a thing exists as this weird vanity project.

[54:37] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[54:37] No, I think this is a good, bad movie.

[54:39] The one thing that like, helps me back a little bit is like the weird anti-Semitism of the movie.

[54:45] Like, it feels like an off note in the same way that like, there are a lot of, I feel

[54:49] like good, bad, or trashy movies out there that like, throw in a rape scene and you're

[54:54] like, why is this in here?

[54:55] Yeah, this ruined the movie.

[54:56] But for the most part, it's not enough to like, be like.

Elliott Kalan

[55:00] I find it's just another, it's just another weirdo thread in the crazy quilt that is this

[55:05] film.

[55:06] And it's okay, I'm saying this, I'm Jewish, it's okay for you to watch this movie.

[55:09] Oh wow, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[55:10] I'm giving you a, anyone who's.

[55:11] He's the gatekeeper here, Dan.

[55:12] Anyone who's not Jewish, I'm giving you official permission.

[55:16] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[55:17] So, no deposit.

[55:21] You're looking at the DVD again to make sure that was the right name.

Stuart Wellington

[55:24] Yeah, it's kind of hard to remember because it has nothing to do with this.

[55:26] What's the name of the soundtrack?

[55:27] The soundtrack has a different name than the movie.

[55:29] Look to the Stars or something?

[55:31] Look Into the Stars.

[55:32] Look Into the Stars.

[55:33] Which is a good way to go blind.

[55:35] Yeah, but it's also like, if you look at the cover of the box, it's just covered in stars.

S4

[55:43] Mugs, shirts, stickers, patches, tanks, and more are yours for the purchasing at maxfunstore.com.

[55:50] Hey, you already love the podcasts, so why not take this to the next level and outfit your

[55:55] home and bod with our merch.

[55:57] maxfunstore.com.

[55:59] Because if you have to wear a shirt, it should be one of ours.

Dan McCoy

[56:04] Uh, next up, we, uh, do a few...

[56:09] Have you seen this show before?

Stuart Wellington

[56:12] Ads.

[56:12] You think after...

[56:13] Oh, okay.

[56:13] You know, I didn't bring it up in August, even though I should have, but August marked

[56:17] the nine-year anniversary of this stupid podcast.

[56:21] Yikes.

Elliott Kalan

[56:22] I wasn't here for all that time, but I'm still going to take credit for it.

[56:24] Mm-hmm.

[56:25] You were there for...

[56:26] Most of it.

[56:26] Like, eight and a half years.

[56:28] Yeah.

[56:28] Some of it.

[56:29] That's crazy.

[56:31] Uh, we've been doing this...

[56:32] You know, that's a, that's a popular anniversary to celebrate, nine years.

[56:35] Yeah.

[56:36] Not, we've been, we should get each other anniversary gifts, though.

[56:38] That'd be nice.

[56:38] We've been doing this podcast longer than either Stuart or I have been married.

[56:42] Yeah.

[56:43] We've been doing this podcast longer than...

[56:46] Or Dan at this point.

Dan McCoy

[56:47] Wait, no, that's not true.

[56:49] It's not actually true.

Elliott Kalan

[56:50] Uh, we've been...

[56:52] We will reach that point.

[56:53] Yeah, yeah.

[56:54] But it's longer than, uh, what, Barack Obama's been president?

[56:59] That's true.

Stuart Wellington

[57:00] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[57:00] It was a different nation when we started this.

[57:03] People needed to laugh.

[57:05] They needed to laugh.

[57:07] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[57:07] That's a crazy amount of time to be doing this.

[57:09] What year was that?

[57:11] 2007 was when...

[57:12] A little movie called Stealth graced my DVD player in my, uh, the bedroom in the apartment

[57:20] I shared with two other people.

Dan McCoy

[57:21] And I stuffed a single rock band microphone in a homemade shock absorber that I made from

Stuart Wellington

[57:27] putting some rubber bands.

[57:28] Oh, that's weird, because everyone has commented that those early episodes had amazing sound

[57:32] quality.

[57:33] It's not great.

[57:33] That's why I revisit them so often.

Dan McCoy

[57:36] Yeah.

[57:37] Don't listen to the early episodes, guys.

[57:38] So many memories.

[57:39] I'm such an asshole.

[57:40] That's a long time.

Elliott Kalan

[57:41] This is the longest I've done almost anything.

[57:46] Uh...

Stuart Wellington

[57:46] Except live.

[57:47] Okay, now that I've juiced us up.

[57:49] Okay.

[57:49] What's the next stage of this game?

[57:51] Ads.

[57:52] Uh, which is to say...

[57:54] We gotta pay the piper.

[57:55] Mm-hmm.

[57:55] That the Flophouse...

[57:56] Nine years don't come cheap.

Dan McCoy

[57:57] Yeah.

[57:58] The Flophouse, uh, is supported by Squarespace, the simplest way to create a compelling website.

[58:04] From the strange to the downright bizarre, great stories define us.

[58:07] You should tell yours.

[58:08] With simple tools and templates, Squarespace helps you capture your story with a captivating

[58:14] website.

Elliott Kalan

[58:14] Now, Dan, I got a question about Squarespace.

[58:16] Okay.

[58:17] I've got an idea for a website.

[58:19] I kind of mentioned it earlier.

[58:21] I'm surprised.

[58:21] It's called www.teenagemutantinjatertletes.org.

[58:25] Mm-hmm.

[58:26] And it's these new crazy characters.

[58:28] They're toilets.

[58:30] Okay.

[58:30] They're also teenagers who are mutants, and they're ninjas.

[58:33] And I want to...

[58:34] I figured, you know what?

[58:36] Don't bother with TV.

[58:37] TV's broken.

[58:38] Thanks to, uh, you know, people are cutting cords left and right.

[58:41] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[58:41] And they're streaming stuff now.

[58:43] They shouldn't cut those cords.

[58:44] I mean, like, the cords aren't the problem.

[58:45] You gotta cut the cord.

[58:46] Yeah, so of course...

[58:47] Once the baby's born.

Elliott Kalan

[58:47] Okay.

[58:48] You can't just leave it attached.

[58:50] Yeah, that's crazy.

[58:51] That's nuts.

[58:51] You want to wait till the last jolts of blood are pumped through that cord.

[58:55] Oh, boy.

[58:56] Because that's the super strength blood.

[58:57] Mm-hmm.

[58:57] Then you cut the shit out of that thing.

[58:59] Yep.

Stuart Wellington

[58:59] You put on that Freddy glove, and you go...

[59:02] That's how they do it.

[59:03] You got it.

[59:04] It's a girl, bitch.

[59:05] Welcome to the world, bitch.

Elliott Kalan

[59:07] I could say that as my kid.

[59:08] Actually, that makes it even worse.

Stuart Wellington

[59:10] That's crazy.

[59:11] What's he doing?

Elliott Kalan

[59:12] I'm just glad that Freddy settled down and started a family.

[59:15] Who is he with?

Stuart Wellington

[59:15] Although he is a child molester, so that's not great.

[59:18] A child murderer, right?

Elliott Kalan

[59:20] Don't they...

[59:20] But that's why they burned his house down, right?

[59:22] Yeah, I guess you're right.

[59:23] Maybe he's just a child murderer.

[59:24] What you're saying is you're...

[59:25] I'm sorry, Freddy.

[59:26] You're merely a child murderer.

[59:27] I apologize.

[59:29] But it's called...

[59:30] So anyway, I want to just get on the web and start streaming these original animated web

[59:35] series about these ninja toilets.

[59:36] Can Squarespace help me with that kind of site?

[59:38] It certainly can.

[59:40] And that's all I have to say about that.

[59:42] Will it make the site look the same on like a phone or on a desktop or on a laptop or on

[59:46] an iPad?

[59:47] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[59:47] It scales to different devices.

[59:50] Yeah.

[59:50] It's got what you call responsive design.

Stuart Wellington

[59:53] That's great.

[59:54] That's great.

[59:54] And what's the...

[59:55] How do they support our show and support Squarespace?

Dan McCoy

[59:59] Well, you can start your free trial today by visiting squarespace.com slash flop.

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:05] You should...

[1:00:06] Squarespace.

[1:00:07] Squarespace.

[1:00:08] So you're saying you're going to hide...

[1:00:11] You're going to have like the bios of these ninja toilets available for anybody, but you're

[1:00:15] going to hide all the videos, the hot vids behind a paywall, right?

[1:00:19] No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:19] Because you don't want anybody to just see that shit.

[1:00:22] Information wants to be free and there's no better information than toilets fighting crime

[1:00:25] with ninja weapons.

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:26] So you're going to make money based on ads.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:29] It's either going to be...

[1:00:29] It's going to be ad supported and also internet equals cash dollar signs.

[1:00:33] Okay.

[1:00:33] I'll figure it out.

[1:00:34] I'll figure out how to monetize this idea.

[1:00:36] I mean, the money's just going to come flowing in, but mostly it's...

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:38] Yeah, and you'll take a big bag and write a dollar sign on it to catch all the money.

[1:00:41] So I know what's in it, yeah.

[1:00:42] Put it right next to your disk drive for when the money squirts out.

[1:00:44] The Flophouse is also...

Dan McCoy

[1:00:46] The Flophouse is also supported in part by Mack Weldon, the clothing company.

[1:00:54] Angus Mack Weldon.

[1:00:55] Mm-hmm.

[1:00:56] Mack Weldon, I'll tell you what.

[1:00:58] It's better than whatever you're wearing right now.

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:00] That's wrong because I'm wearing Mack Weldon right now.

[1:01:02] Really?

[1:01:03] Yeah.

[1:01:03] This is to tell the truth.

[1:01:05] My Mack Weldon underpants, first in the rotation, right off the bat.

[1:01:10] Okay.

[1:01:10] Every time.

[1:01:10] I always go through them and then I go through my lesser Hanes or what have you underpants.

[1:01:16] Now, they're comfortable.

[1:01:18] They're roomy.

[1:01:20] They're not too roomy.

[1:01:21] They're crummy?

[1:01:21] They're crummy, which is a word you just made up that I don't know what it means.

[1:01:24] It's comfortable and roomy.

[1:01:26] Oh, I see.

[1:01:26] Yeah, that makes sense.

[1:01:27] They're super crummy.

[1:01:28] Yeah.

[1:01:29] When you think Mack Weldon, think crummy.

[1:01:32] The crummy center.

[1:01:33] Yeah.

[1:01:34] That's a croissant.

[1:01:35] But they are super comfortable underpants.

[1:01:37] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[1:01:38] Yeah, and they make all your business look great.

Dan McCoy

[1:01:40] Yeah.

[1:01:41] What were you going to say, Dan?

[1:01:41] Well, Mack Weldon wants you to be comfortable.

[1:01:43] So if you don't like your first pair, you can keep it and they will refund you, no question

[1:01:48] asked.

[1:01:50] No questions asked, even.

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:52] One, multiple questions, et cetera.

[1:01:54] Just making it better each time.

Stuart Wellington

[1:01:56] You know, as I have gotten older, guys, when I was a young man, I just put whatever I wanted

[1:02:01] on my undercarriage.

[1:02:02] Mm-hmm.

[1:02:02] But as I've gotten older, I've realized.

[1:02:03] Sometimes hot dog buns.

[1:02:05] Yeah.

[1:02:06] Yeah, yeah.

[1:02:06] Yeah.

[1:02:06] I mean, in a pinch.

[1:02:09] It's what I call it when I pinch my business with a hot dog bun.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:12] I don't want to know about that.

Stuart Wellington

[1:02:13] But it's a thing.

[1:02:16] Look it up on the internet.

[1:02:17] But what I was saying is, as I've gotten older, I don't mind spending a little bit extra bucks

[1:02:23] on the stuff that keeps my business that you can't see on my underpants.

[1:02:28] Look, you only get one.

[1:02:29] Unless you're Dan and you come over.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:30] You only get one.

[1:02:32] Yeah.

[1:02:32] Take good care of it.

[1:02:33] Body?

[1:02:34] Penis?

[1:02:34] Yes.

[1:02:35] Oh, okay.

[1:02:36] Unless you're that sideshow guy from the 20s who had three legs and two penises.

[1:02:40] Okay.

[1:02:40] Mm-hmm.

[1:02:40] I don't remember his name.

[1:02:41] He was Italian.

[1:02:43] What do you make of face?

[1:02:45] Because I'm trying to remember and I can't remember it.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:48] But Mack Weldon, it's good for working out.

[1:02:52] It's good for going to work.

[1:02:53] It's good for going out dates.

[1:02:54] It's good for everyday life.

[1:02:56] It's just good, guys.

[1:02:58] And if you go to MackWeldon.com, you can get 20% off using the promo code FLOP.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:05] Perfect.

[1:03:06] Go buy them.

[1:03:07] You will not be unsatisfied.

Dan McCoy

[1:03:09] Thank you for your support.

Stuart Wellington

[1:03:12] And now we got some Jumbotrons.

[1:03:15] J-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-jumbotrons.

[1:03:21] Dan, punch that up.

[1:03:22] Okay.

[1:03:23] Okay.

[1:03:24] So I got the first.

[1:03:26] No, I think Elliot's going to go first.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:27] Oh, okay.

[1:03:28] I'll go first.

[1:03:28] This is a personal message.

[1:03:30] Mm-hmm.

[1:03:30] This is a message for Melissa Trujillo from Dylan Trujillo.

[1:03:36] And in parentheses, her awesome little brother.

[1:03:37] It says, happy birthday.

[1:03:39] I know you'll love the gift of the peaches saying happy birthday, Melissa.

[1:03:44] Happy birthday, Melissa.

[1:03:45] Hey.

[1:03:45] Happy birthday, Melissa.

[1:03:46] Will Elliot sing a song?

[1:03:48] Maybe.

[1:03:49] Happy birthday to you.

[1:03:51] I can sing it now because it's in the public domain.

[1:03:55] Turns out Sony never actually owns the copyright.

[1:03:58] They just stole money from a lot of people for decades.

[1:04:01] To you.

[1:04:02] Will Dan sigh?

[1:04:05] Will Stu crack a beer?

[1:04:06] Oh, shit.

[1:04:08] He's just got a bottle of Schweppes over there.

[1:04:09] For once he doesn't have a beer.

[1:04:11] You're the best.

[1:04:12] And you're welcome for showing.

[1:04:13] Oh, that didn't work.

[1:04:15] And you're welcome for showing you this great podcast.

[1:04:18] Oh, and you're welcome for showing you this great.

[1:04:20] Well, I don't know.

[1:04:21] Anyway, Sonaway.

[1:04:22] Oh, no.

[1:04:22] It should be.

[1:04:23] So you're welcome.

[1:04:25] Oh, you know what?

[1:04:26] Oh, boy.

[1:04:26] This is falling apart.

[1:04:27] Dylan, you got to put some quotes in there.

[1:04:29] Some comments.

[1:04:30] Now I know how to read it.

[1:04:31] And you're welcome for showing you this great podcast.

[1:04:33] Sonaway, I am also the best.

[1:04:35] To the both of us.

[1:04:36] Seriously, I love you.

[1:04:37] And you're an amazing sister.

[1:04:39] Rawrow.

[1:04:40] Rawrow.

[1:04:40] Dylan.

Dan McCoy

[1:04:41] So happy birthday, Melissa.

[1:04:43] That's so sweet.

[1:04:44] From a brother to a sister.

[1:04:45] You don't really see a lot of that kind of sibling commitment.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:49] I often forget to tell my sister happy birthday.

[1:04:51] And we share her birthday.

[1:04:52] Yeah.

[1:04:52] It is impossible for me to forget it.

Stuart Wellington

[1:04:55] So up next on the old Jumbotron.

[1:04:59] J-j-j-j-jumbotron.

[1:05:00] What I can only assume is another personal message.

[1:05:05] This message is for Helen.

[1:05:07] The message is from Jason.

[1:05:10] And the message reads as follows.

[1:05:14] Sup.

[1:05:15] Okay, thanks.

[1:05:17] Yeah, thank you very much.

[1:05:18] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1:05:19] So Helen, if you're out there, Jason says, sup.

[1:05:22] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:25] If you'd like to tell someone sup over the Jumbotron.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:28] Jump over to MaximumFun.com and...

[1:05:30] Org.

[1:05:31] MaximumFun.org.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:32] Don't go to MaximumFun.com.

[1:05:34] No, no, it's porn.

[1:05:34] Go to MaximumFun.org slash Jumbotron.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:37] Yeah, it's somewhere in there.

[1:05:39] I believe so.

[1:05:40] I believe so.

[1:05:43] But now, it's time for letters from listeners.

[1:05:47] You write them, we read them.

[1:05:49] It's time.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:50] It's letter.

[1:05:52] Time.

[1:05:53] Letter.

[1:05:55] Time.

[1:05:55] For listeners.

[1:05:57] Yeah, it's a great song.

[1:05:58] Not really a song.

Dan McCoy

[1:06:00] It was sort of a call and response sort of thing.

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:03] It was a thing, yeah.

[1:06:04] It was a thing.

[1:06:04] That's the great thing about the word thing,

[1:06:06] is you can use it to describe stuff

[1:06:07] that doesn't really have a word.

[1:06:09] Yeah, as established earlier.

[1:06:11] Like, what are those things

[1:06:11] that the end of your shoelaces is called?

[1:06:13] Who is that guy covered in rocks?

[1:06:15] They're called aglets.

[1:06:16] Yeah.

[1:06:16] And thing is the guy.

[1:06:17] Oh, I see what you did, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:06:19] Uh, so this first letter

[1:06:21] is from

[1:06:23] First Name Withheld, Robert, Last Name Withheld.

[1:06:25] Hmm, that's the middle name.

[1:06:27] Who says...

[1:06:27] I assume that's James Robert Ryan Tolkien.

[1:06:30] Mm-hmm.

[1:06:31] As with most parents of preteen children,

[1:06:34] the Flophouse is our standard entertainment

[1:06:36] to listen to

[1:06:37] while shuttling the kids

[1:06:38] to their various basketball and baseball events.

[1:06:40] Not this one, I hope.

[1:06:41] That's terrible.

[1:06:43] Uh, the 13-year-old will last

[1:06:46] until the first sustained Elliot pun run,

[1:06:48] at which time the earphones are put on

[1:06:50] with an audible sigh.

[1:06:51] Ha ha ha!

[1:06:52] Kids hate me.

[1:06:53] She must be paying closer attention

[1:06:55] than I thought.

[1:06:55] As the other day,

[1:06:56] I was watching a movie

[1:06:57] and she asked me

[1:06:57] if it was a bad, bad movie,

[1:06:58] a good, bad movie,

[1:06:59] or a movie I kind of liked.

[1:07:01] Stuart, as the resident cinephile,

[1:07:03] how long until this becomes

[1:07:04] the new standard rating system

[1:07:06] for all movies?

[1:07:08] Dan?

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:08] Uh, I give it another...

[1:07:10] What?

[1:07:10] We've been doing this nine years?

[1:07:11] Nine years.

[1:07:12] So one more year.

[1:07:12] Ten years is the, uh, the rule.

[1:07:15] Yeah.

[1:07:15] We have to.

[1:07:17] Yeah, that's what they have to do.

[1:07:18] There's your grandfather in it.

[1:07:20] So, uh, call up the father of movies.

[1:07:22] Yeah.

[1:07:24] Thomas Edison?

[1:07:25] Yes.

[1:07:26] Call him up.

[1:07:26] The Loomian Brothers?

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:28] Oh, the ten-year grandfather

[1:07:30] you're talking about, Dan?

[1:07:30] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:07:32] Ten-year grandfather.

[1:07:33] That's terrible.

[1:07:34] Uh, Dan, my son would like to know

[1:07:36] when you're going to find

[1:07:37] the Jersey Devil.

[1:07:38] Look.

[1:07:39] Uh, that was a long time ago.

[1:07:41] Yeah, that's...

[1:07:42] Yeah, I assume that's a reference

[1:07:44] to our ghost hunting videos?

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:45] Yeah, that's not even

[1:07:45] a Flophouse thing.

[1:07:47] Yeah.

[1:07:47] That was a video that we made

[1:07:48] for my old live show,

[1:07:50] The Primetime Kalen.

Dan McCoy

[1:07:51] If you look up ghost hunters,

[1:07:54] uh, Dan McCoy, Elliot Kalen,

[1:07:57] you might come up with a few

[1:07:58] amusing YouTube videos.

[1:08:00] Very, very amateurish YouTube videos.

[1:08:02] Very slapdash videos

[1:08:04] that were put together

[1:08:04] for a live show.

[1:08:05] And so we're like,

[1:08:06] let's not put a lot of work

[1:08:07] into them.

[1:08:07] Because they're going to be

[1:08:08] shown once and then

[1:08:09] that's it.

[1:08:11] Uh, but, uh, yeah,

[1:08:13] the search continues.

[1:08:15] Um, Elliot,

[1:08:17] as the resident comic book expert,

[1:08:18] what is your opinion

[1:08:19] on including real characters

[1:08:21] or other out-of-context

[1:08:23] references in your stories?

[1:08:25] Is there a difference

[1:08:25] between an Easter egg

[1:08:26] and a reference slash cameo

[1:08:27] that breaks you out

[1:08:28] of the comic slash movie

[1:08:29] slash TV show's world?

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:32] Yeah, there is.

[1:08:33] But it's one of those things

[1:08:34] like obscenity.

[1:08:35] I know it when I see it.

[1:08:37] It's hard for me to define.

[1:08:39] It's like, uh,

[1:08:41] there are times when

[1:08:42] things can get a little

[1:08:43] too winky.

[1:08:44] And then it's like,

[1:08:45] all right,

[1:08:46] like I can't buy into

[1:08:47] the reality of this anymore.

[1:08:49] I mean,

[1:08:50] Stan Lee's cameos

[1:08:51] in his movies

[1:08:51] kind of become that

[1:08:52] as they get more

[1:08:54] baroque,

[1:08:55] you know?

[1:08:56] Uh,

[1:08:57] or if you're reading

[1:08:58] a comic book

[1:08:59] and there's clearly

[1:08:59] a scene where

[1:09:00] the creators of the comic

[1:09:01] are like having

[1:09:01] a conversation,

[1:09:03] that can be fun

[1:09:03] for a panel.

[1:09:05] But if it's a whole page,

[1:09:06] forget about it.

[1:09:08] You're talking to somebody

[1:09:09] who wrote a series

[1:09:10] of one-page bits

[1:09:11] where it's just starring

[1:09:13] Wyatt,

[1:09:13] Sinek,

[1:09:14] and me?

[1:09:14] Yeah.

[1:09:15] Co-wrote with Wyatt.

[1:09:16] Which have been republished

[1:09:17] in a book that's coming

[1:09:18] out from Marvel

[1:09:19] called Secret Wars 2.

[1:09:21] Oh, great.

[1:09:22] Which is,

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:22] they reprinted a bunch

[1:09:23] of their humor books

[1:09:24] and all my humor stuff

[1:09:24] is in there.

[1:09:25] Yeah.

[1:09:27] I didn't know it existed

[1:09:28] until they sent me

[1:09:28] one in the mail.

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:29] I prefer it when,

[1:09:30] like,

[1:09:31] Dave Sim shows up

[1:09:32] in a Cerebus book

[1:09:33] and he teaches us

[1:09:34] some real life lessons

[1:09:35] like,

[1:09:36] da broads,

[1:09:37] am I right?

[1:09:37] This movie

[1:09:38] that we watched today

[1:09:39] had a real Dave Sim

[1:09:40] take on women.

[1:09:41] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:09:42] And last question

[1:09:43] from this email.

[1:09:44] Housecat,

[1:09:44] why did you not have

[1:09:45] a character in the

[1:09:45] Adventure Zone crossover?

[1:09:47] Was it a dispute

[1:09:47] about money

[1:09:48] or are you just

[1:09:48] too serious for D&D?

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:50] I'll have to ask him

[1:09:51] sometime.

[1:09:52] He doesn't have

[1:09:53] a lot of time for D&D.

[1:09:54] I wouldn't say

[1:09:55] it's too serious.

[1:09:56] He just doesn't really

[1:09:57] truck with that nerd shit.

[1:09:59] You know what I mean?

[1:09:59] Yeah, he's a little

[1:10:00] too cool.

Elliott Kalan

[1:10:01] Yeah.

[1:10:01] You know how some people

[1:10:02] are so cool

[1:10:03] that they can do nerdy stuff

[1:10:04] and still be cool?

[1:10:05] He's even cooler than that.

[1:10:06] He's the next step.

Stuart Wellington

[1:10:07] Yeah.

[1:10:08] Yeah, it cycles back

[1:10:09] on itself.

Dan McCoy

[1:10:10] He's busy skateboarding,

[1:10:12] having one of the

[1:10:13] Frank D'Angelo

[1:10:15] energy drinks.

[1:10:17] That's what he drinks now.

Stuart Wellington

[1:10:19] Yeah.

[1:10:19] Hey, do you guys

[1:10:19] ever fantasize about

[1:10:21] if some kid

[1:10:23] is in like a

[1:10:24] Home Alone situation

[1:10:25] and he's got to

[1:10:26] scare off burglars

[1:10:26] that he's going to

[1:10:27] use audio files

[1:10:28] of your podcast clips

[1:10:30] to scare the burglars away?

[1:10:32] Not really.

Dan McCoy

[1:10:33] Okay.

[1:10:34] Like your filthy animal bit?

[1:10:36] Home Alone?

Stuart Wellington

[1:10:37] Yeah, my classic

[1:10:38] Stuart Wellington

[1:10:38] filthy animal bit

[1:10:39] from the Flophouse podcast.

Dan McCoy

[1:10:43] No, I've never thought

[1:10:44] about that.

[1:10:46] So this is from

[1:10:47] Michael Lastname Withheld

[1:10:49] who writes,

[1:10:50] Recently I was stricken

[1:10:51] with a nasty stomach bug

[1:10:53] to distract me

[1:10:54] from my nausea

[1:10:55] and to help cover up

[1:10:56] the sounds that come along

[1:10:57] with a nasty stomach bug.

[1:10:58] I downloaded a bunch

[1:10:59] of Flophouse episodes

[1:11:00] to comfort me

[1:11:01] as I pressed my face

[1:11:02] to the cool tile floor

[1:11:03] of the bathroom.

[1:11:05] For once in Earth's history,

[1:11:06] Elliot's singing

[1:11:07] actually soothes somebody.

[1:11:08] Oh, come on.

[1:11:09] Although Stuart's talk

[1:11:10] of wormy boners

[1:11:11] did not help my queasiness.

[1:11:13] And with every mournful sigh

[1:11:14] from Dan,

[1:11:15] I thought,

[1:11:16] What the fuck

[1:11:16] are you so sad about?

[1:11:17] I'm dying here,

[1:11:18] you bastard.

[1:11:19] Sorry, Dan.

[1:11:20] It was the virus talking.

[1:11:22] After a rough couple of days,

[1:11:24] I realized I was going to live

[1:11:25] and indeed managed

[1:11:26] to stand on the bathroom scale

[1:11:28] to assess the damage.

[1:11:29] I looked down

[1:11:30] to find that in two days

[1:11:31] I had managed to lose

[1:11:32] seven pounds.

[1:11:35] What?

[1:11:35] Oh, he strikes again.

[1:11:37] That's right.

[1:11:37] It was clear

[1:11:38] this was no random illness.

[1:11:39] No, I'd been poisoned

[1:11:40] by that dastardly supervillain.

[1:11:42] Had he been my Uber driver

[1:11:43] the night before?

[1:11:44] Had he slipped some concoction

[1:11:45] into my food,

[1:11:46] posing as a line cook?

[1:11:47] And why had he picked me?

[1:11:49] Actually, I'm pretty fucking awesome,

[1:11:50] so that part was understandable.

[1:11:52] Just be careful out there, fellas.

[1:11:53] Seven pounds is back in town.

[1:11:55] Also,

[1:11:56] what movies do you like

[1:11:57] to watch when you're sick?

Stuart Wellington

[1:12:00] My go-to has been,

[1:12:03] like lately,

[1:12:04] it's been The World's End.

[1:12:06] Okay.

[1:12:06] That's a good one.

[1:12:07] It's one of those things

[1:12:07] I can just put on

[1:12:08] and like,

[1:12:09] I go to my happy place.

[1:12:12] And sometimes,

[1:12:13] lately,

[1:12:14] I'll also throw in The Guest.

[1:12:16] Oh.

[1:12:16] The Guest is a good one.

Dan McCoy

[1:12:18] Yeah,

[1:12:18] I would put that on my list.

[1:12:20] I mean,

[1:12:20] and likewise,

[1:12:22] any 80s John Carpenter,

[1:12:24] which is basically

[1:12:25] the same thing

[1:12:26] as The Guest.

[1:12:27] Yep.

[1:12:27] I would watch when I'm sick.

Elliott Kalan

[1:12:30] I don't get sick very much.

[1:12:32] My body just kind of

[1:12:33] rejects illness.

[1:12:34] Mm-hmm.

[1:12:35] But the first time

[1:12:36] I had a kidney stone

[1:12:37] was pretty bad,

[1:12:39] and I remember watching

[1:12:40] From Beyond

[1:12:41] for the first time,

[1:12:43] and I was like,

[1:12:43] around the point

[1:12:44] that Jeffrey Combs,

[1:12:46] as he's mutating

[1:12:47] because he's seen

[1:12:48] another dimension,

[1:12:49] sucks the eyeball

[1:12:50] out of another man's head,

[1:12:52] I was like,

[1:12:52] this movie gets

[1:12:53] where I'm at right now.

[1:12:54] Yeah.

[1:12:54] And it really helped.

Stuart Wellington

[1:12:55] I suffered

[1:12:57] a pretty bad arm injury.

[1:12:59] I broke my humerus

[1:13:00] after having recently

[1:13:01] broken my radius,

[1:13:02] and let me tell you,

[1:13:02] Oh, you're still pretty funny.

[1:13:03] It was not humorous.

[1:13:04] You beat me

[1:13:05] to the fucking joke,

[1:13:06] you asshole.

[1:13:07] Hello, Dan.

[1:13:08] High five awaiting you.

[1:13:10] Yeah, you earned that.

[1:13:11] I was stuck on the couch

[1:13:12] for a while,

[1:13:12] and of course,

[1:13:13] my mom went out

[1:13:14] and rented me some tapes

[1:13:15] from the local B-buster.

[1:13:19] B-buster?

[1:13:20] B-buster.

[1:13:21] And she fucking,

[1:13:21] belly buster.

[1:13:22] She knows me

[1:13:23] because the top

[1:13:25] of that stack of tapes

[1:13:26] was Jeff Fahey's

[1:13:27] vehicle body parts.

[1:13:29] Nice.

[1:13:30] But a guy who gets

[1:13:31] in a horrible car accident,

[1:13:32] which is how I'd

[1:13:33] broken my arm,

[1:13:34] and gets a grafted arm

[1:13:37] of a serial killer

[1:13:38] on his body,

[1:13:39] and guess what?

[1:13:39] That arm wants

[1:13:40] to kill people.

Dan McCoy

[1:13:41] Mm-hmm.

[1:13:42] Mm-hmm.

[1:13:43] Muscle memory.

[1:13:44] Yeah.

[1:13:44] That's right.

[1:13:46] I'm good at one thing.

[1:13:47] Why won't they

[1:13:47] let me do it anymore?

[1:13:49] Murdering.

[1:13:49] So,

[1:13:52] this is from

[1:13:53] Joe Lastnamewitheld,

[1:13:54] who writes,

[1:13:55] The Flophouse

[1:13:56] is my favorite podcast.

[1:13:57] Dan and Elliot,

[1:13:57] I love you guys too,

[1:13:58] but this question

[1:13:59] is for my favorite

[1:14:00] flopper,

[1:14:01] Stu.

[1:14:01] Well,

[1:14:01] thanks for listening.

[1:14:02] Okay,

Stuart Wellington

[1:14:02] thanks Joe Montana,

[1:14:03] 49ers former quarterback.

Dan McCoy

[1:14:06] Stu,

[1:14:07] I recently bought

[1:14:08] Netrunner

[1:14:09] on your recommendation

[1:14:10] from the

[1:14:10] We Are Your Friends app.

[1:14:12] Okay.

[1:14:13] However,

[1:14:14] neither of my roommates,

[1:14:15] my usual strategy game crew,

[1:14:18] will play with me.

[1:14:19] Weird.

[1:14:20] I was thinking of bringing it

[1:14:21] to my local board game night,

[1:14:22] but I don't want to be that guy

[1:14:23] that rolls into a game night,

[1:14:24] convinces someone to play with him,

[1:14:26] and then takes 20 minutes

[1:14:27] to figure out how ice works.

[1:14:29] Yep.

[1:14:29] How would you suggest

[1:14:30] I find someone

[1:14:31] who I can start playing

[1:14:32] my new game with?

[1:14:33] Thanks,

[1:14:33] Joe Lastnamewitheld.

[1:14:34] Tinder,

[1:14:34] probably,

[1:14:35] right?

Stuart Wellington

[1:14:35] Yeah,

[1:14:36] I think that's the best way

[1:14:37] if you're like,

[1:14:37] hey,

[1:14:37] you want to crank

[1:14:38] some fucking ice?

[1:14:40] I would say,

[1:14:41] I don't know exactly

[1:14:44] where you live,

[1:14:44] but I know in New York

[1:14:45] that if you go

[1:14:47] look for meetups

[1:14:48] for board games

[1:14:49] and you can look for meetups

[1:14:50] for the card game

[1:14:53] in question,

[1:14:53] you can also go on

[1:14:55] boardgamegeek.com

[1:14:56] and look at the forums.

[1:14:59] Yeah,

[1:14:59] or go on,

[1:15:00] in this case,

[1:15:01] the producer of that game's

[1:15:03] community section

[1:15:04] and find meetups

[1:15:05] for that game that way.

[1:15:07] That's what I would suggest.

[1:15:09] Or come down to Hinterland's Bar,

[1:15:11] the bar I just opened,

[1:15:11] and I'll play you, dude.

[1:15:12] In Brooklyn, New York,

[1:15:13] he will.

[1:15:14] Set it up on the bar.

[1:15:15] We'll be talking about ice.

[1:15:18] Yeah.

[1:15:18] Both the beverage

[1:15:20] and the thing in the game.

[1:15:22] Beverage?

[1:15:23] Yeah,

[1:15:23] yeah,

[1:15:23] like an icy.

[1:15:25] I mean,

[1:15:26] like,

[1:15:27] you'd put ice in your drink,

[1:15:28] but I don't,

[1:15:29] I mean,

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:30] I guess the health department

Stuart Wellington

[1:15:31] calls it a food at this point.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:33] I mean,

[1:15:34] that seems weird, too,

[1:15:35] but it makes more sense to me.

Stuart Wellington

[1:15:36] Yeah,

[1:15:36] that's why a bar

[1:15:37] counts as a restaurant

[1:15:39] for the health department.

[1:15:40] Just for the ice.

[1:15:40] Ice counts as food, yeah.

[1:15:42] Go on, Dan.

Dan McCoy

[1:15:44] That's a little insight

[1:15:45] into New York

[1:15:47] health department regulations.

[1:15:48] Also,

[1:15:49] take care of your regulars.

[1:15:50] Be a Paul Sorvino.

[1:15:52] Give them a free drink

[1:15:54] when they lose their house.

[1:15:55] Yep.

[1:15:56] Because you never know,

[1:15:57] they might go into a,

[1:15:58] bank and start

[1:15:59] shooting people up.

[1:16:00] Yeah,

[1:16:01] yeah,

[1:16:01] he's the seven pounds

[1:16:02] in this scenario.

[1:16:05] This,

[1:16:06] last one.

[1:16:08] Last letter.

[1:16:09] I assume is mostly

[1:16:10] for Elliot.

[1:16:11] You never know.

[1:16:13] Dear Elliot.

[1:16:13] Oh,

[1:16:13] then probably.

[1:16:15] Oh,

[1:16:15] it starts out

[1:16:15] with the word Elliot,

[1:16:16] so.

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:17] So,

[1:16:18] when you read things,

[1:16:19] you usually start

[1:16:19] in the middle

[1:16:20] and then just kind of

[1:16:20] like expand outward

[1:16:21] in concentric rings

[1:16:22] until you reach

[1:16:23] the beginning?

Dan McCoy

[1:16:24] I saw the word,

[1:16:25] well,

[1:16:26] because it's a,

[1:16:27] it was a hyperlink

[1:16:27] when I printed it out.

[1:16:28] Oh.

[1:16:29] I saw President Lincoln

[1:16:30] underlined.

[1:16:32] Oh,

[1:16:32] so,

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:33] the eyes went to it.

[1:16:33] Because I find

[1:16:34] that's actually how

[1:16:35] I read menus

[1:16:35] a lot of the time

[1:16:36] and I have to force

[1:16:37] myself to go.

Stuart Wellington

[1:16:38] you like zoom in

[1:16:39] on a specific,

[1:16:40] like if a word

[1:16:41] catches your eye

[1:16:42] and you're like,

[1:16:43] I don't know,

[1:16:44] like,

[1:16:44] pork belly.

[1:16:45] I mean,

[1:16:45] the word is almost

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:46] always pork,

[1:16:48] steak,

[1:16:48] or chicken.

[1:16:49] Like it's,

[1:16:49] and then,

[1:16:50] you're like,

[1:16:50] oh honey,

[1:16:51] they have chicken.

[1:16:52] Give me a second,

[1:16:52] I'm reading.

[1:16:54] And then I put my

[1:16:55] bookmark in the part

[1:16:56] of the menu

[1:16:56] I left off at,

[1:16:57] take a nap,

[1:16:58] use the bathroom,

[1:16:59] come back.

[1:17:00] But I find I have

[1:17:01] to force myself

[1:17:01] to start at the

[1:17:02] beginning of the menu.

[1:17:03] The appetizers

[1:17:04] usually.

[1:17:06] And then there's

[1:17:06] a twist ending,

[1:17:08] dessert.

[1:17:08] Oh wow.

[1:17:10] Turns out,

[1:17:11] the chocolate fondue

[1:17:12] did it.

[1:17:16] Spoiler alert.

Stuart Wellington

[1:17:19] What's that,

[1:17:20] what's that cake

[1:17:21] doing upside down?

Elliott Kalan

[1:17:23] We'll find out

[1:17:23] when we get there,

[1:17:24] honey.

Dan McCoy

[1:17:25] The molten

[1:17:26] chocolate cake

[1:17:27] burned him to death

[1:17:28] with its lava.

[1:17:31] Yep.

[1:17:31] Dan McCoy,

[1:17:32] dessert detective.

[1:17:33] Elliot,

[1:17:35] have you ever been

[1:17:35] to President Lincoln's

[1:17:37] cottage at the

[1:17:37] soldier's home

[1:17:38] in D.C.?

[1:17:38] It's one of the

[1:17:39] most fascinating

[1:17:40] and underrated

[1:17:41] tourist attractions

[1:17:41] in D.C.,

[1:17:42] far more interesting

[1:17:43] than Ford's Theater,

[1:17:44] a weird tourist

[1:17:45] scam hub.

[1:17:46] It's a modest

[1:17:47] house in Petworth,

[1:17:48] where Lincoln lived

[1:17:49] for much of his

[1:17:50] presidency.

Elliott Kalan

[1:17:50] I'm familiar with

[1:17:51] the soldier's home.

Dan McCoy

[1:17:52] Commuting by horse

[1:17:53] to the White House.

[1:17:54] He wrote the

[1:17:54] Emancipation Proclamation

[1:17:55] there,

[1:17:56] and the tour gives

[1:17:57] a great overview

[1:17:58] of his personality

[1:17:58] and the personality

[1:17:59] of D.C.

[1:18:00] as a city.

[1:18:01] I bet the tour

[1:18:01] would give you

[1:18:02] even greater context

[1:18:02] for understanding

[1:18:03] the day-to-day

[1:18:04] life of Lincoln

[1:18:04] and the great

[1:18:05] pressures he faced.

[1:18:07] I'd also like to

[1:18:08] recommend this tour

[1:18:08] to anyone else

[1:18:09] listening.

[1:18:10] It's great,

[1:18:11] and I always

[1:18:11] encourage tourists

[1:18:12] to get off the mall

[1:18:13] and see D.C.

[1:18:15] as the great city

[1:18:16] as it is.

[1:18:17] Oh, D.C.,

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:17] the Center for Disease

[1:18:18] Control?

[1:18:18] Yeah,

[1:18:19] last name of health.

[1:18:19] I've actually never

[1:18:20] been...

[1:18:20] encouraged is when

[1:18:21] you force people

[1:18:22] to watch the

[1:18:22] Entourage movie.

[1:18:24] Well, you don't

[1:18:25] force them.

Dan McCoy

[1:18:25] You just, you know,

[1:18:27] push it on them

[1:18:28] a little bit.

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:28] Yeah, you invite

[1:18:29] them over for a party

[1:18:30] and then you just

[1:18:30] put it on the

[1:18:31] DVD player and

[1:18:32] you're like,

[1:18:32] hey, just do

[1:18:33] what your body

[1:18:34] wants, guys.

Elliott Kalan

[1:18:36] And then they

[1:18:36] turn it off

[1:18:37] because that's

[1:18:37] what their body

[1:18:38] wants.

[1:18:39] Their body

[1:18:39] rejects it.

[1:18:40] I've actually

[1:18:40] never been to

[1:18:41] the soldier's

[1:18:41] home.

[1:18:41] I've really

[1:18:42] wanted to go

[1:18:42] and I haven't

[1:18:43] had a trip to

[1:18:44] D.C.

[1:18:45] in years

[1:18:46] when I've been

[1:18:46] able to go to it.

[1:18:48] We went to D.C.

[1:18:48] for a live show.

[1:18:50] For like a day.

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:51] Yeah, and Elliot

[1:18:52] was like,

[1:18:52] take me to

[1:18:53] soldier's home,

[1:18:54] take me to

[1:18:54] soldier's home.

[1:18:55] And we're like,

[1:18:55] no, we don't

[1:18:55] have time, Elliot.

Dan McCoy

[1:18:56] Maybe tomorrow,

[1:18:57] Elliot.

[1:18:57] We'd like to see it.

[1:18:58] We rubbed a little

[1:19:00] whiskey on his gums

[1:19:02] and put him to bed.

Elliott Kalan

[1:19:03] Yeah, that was

[1:19:04] fussy.

[1:19:06] I was just

[1:19:07] reading a book

[1:19:07] recently about

[1:19:09] Lincoln's relationship

[1:19:09] with John Hay,

[1:19:11] one of his

[1:19:12] private secretaries,

[1:19:13] later became

[1:19:14] Teddy Roosevelt's

[1:19:14] secretary of state

[1:19:15] among other posts

[1:19:16] that he held.

[1:19:17] And it talked

[1:19:18] about these

[1:19:19] horse rides

[1:19:19] that they would

[1:19:20] do, the two of

[1:19:21] them between

[1:19:21] the White House

[1:19:22] and the soldier's

[1:19:22] home.

[1:19:23] And I was

[1:19:23] getting so envious

[1:19:24] for all this

[1:19:25] concentrated time

[1:19:26] that he got to

[1:19:27] spend with

[1:19:28] Abraham Lincoln

[1:19:28] just kind of

[1:19:29] like hanging

[1:19:29] out.

[1:19:30] And I would

[1:19:31] like to go

[1:19:31] see it actually

[1:19:32] for that reason.

[1:19:33] It was,

[1:19:33] at the time

[1:19:34] it was built,

[1:19:34] it was way

[1:19:35] off in the

[1:19:35] woods.

[1:19:36] And now

[1:19:36] it's just

[1:19:37] in D.C.

[1:19:37] because the

[1:19:37] city has

[1:19:38] expanded.

[1:19:38] But I'd

[1:19:39] like to go.

Stuart Wellington

[1:19:40] Maybe you

[1:19:41] could convince

[1:19:41] Daniel Day-Lewis

[1:19:42] to go with you

[1:19:43] and he would

[1:19:43] put on his

[1:19:44] Lincoln performance.

[1:19:46] There's only a

Elliott Kalan

[1:19:47] few steps that

[1:19:47] I'll have to go

[1:19:48] through to get

[1:19:48] to that point.

[1:19:51] Step one,

[1:19:53] find out how

[1:19:54] to contact

[1:19:54] Daniel Day-Lewis.

Stuart Wellington

[1:19:55] I mean,

[1:19:56] if he's not

[1:19:56] available,

[1:19:57] just get

[1:19:57] Daniel Night-Lewis.

[1:19:59] Oh boy.

[1:20:00] Thanks guys.

[1:20:01] I've been great

[1:20:02] tonight.

Elliott Kalan

[1:20:02] Is that M. Night

[1:20:03] Shyamalan's

[1:20:03] middle name,

[1:20:04] brother?

[1:20:05] M. Day

[1:20:05] Shyamalan.

[1:20:08] M. Day Shyamalan

[1:20:09] has no twist

[1:20:10] endings in his

[1:20:11] films.

[1:20:12] You see what

[1:20:12] you get,

[1:20:13] says M. Day

[1:20:13] Shyamalan.

Dan McCoy

[1:20:17] Hey,

[1:20:19] now it's time

[1:20:19] for the last

[1:20:20] segment on the

[1:20:21] show.

[1:20:22] Okay.

[1:20:22] I don't know

[1:20:23] if I have the

[1:20:23] energy.

[1:20:24] Yeah,

[1:20:24] sure I do.

[1:20:24] Which is when

[1:20:25] we recommend

[1:20:26] movies that

[1:20:27] we actually

[1:20:28] liked,

[1:20:28] although we

[1:20:29] enjoyed

[1:20:29] No Reservation.

Stuart Wellington

[1:20:33] Parts Unknown

[1:20:35] was...

[1:20:37] This is a movie

[1:20:39] that you'd watch

[1:20:39] as like a

[1:20:40] double feature

[1:20:40] with no deposit.

Elliott Kalan

[1:20:42] So what are you

[1:20:43] guys going to

[1:20:43] recommend?

[1:20:44] I have my

[1:20:44] recommendation.

[1:20:45] Okay,

[1:20:45] so,

[1:20:46] okay,

[1:20:47] I'll go first.

[1:20:48] No pressure,

[1:20:49] but I've got one.

Stuart Wellington

[1:20:49] I'm going to

[1:20:50] recommend a movie

[1:20:50] that probably

[1:20:51] doesn't need me

[1:20:52] to champion for

[1:20:53] it.

[1:20:53] This is a movie

[1:20:54] that was,

[1:20:56] I guess,

[1:20:57] a big release

[1:20:57] when I was a

[1:20:58] kid and I

[1:20:58] saw it in the

[1:20:58] theater.

[1:21:00] It stars

[1:21:01] Elliot's pal,

[1:21:02] Sly Stallone.

[1:21:04] It's a movie

[1:21:05] called Demolition

[1:21:05] Man.

[1:21:06] So if you're

[1:21:07] looking for

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:08] a big...

[1:21:09] Dan had to

[1:21:10] look at his

[1:21:10] face like,

[1:21:11] you bastard.

[1:21:12] Are you going

[1:21:13] to recommend

[1:21:13] Demolition Man?

Dan McCoy

[1:21:16] Why today

[1:21:17] of all days?

[1:21:20] Why in 2016?

Stuart Wellington

[1:21:25] Dan stares

[1:21:26] into my eyes

[1:21:27] and hoping to

[1:21:28] find some kind

[1:21:28] of understanding

[1:21:29] there,

[1:21:30] but he sees

[1:21:30] nothing.

[1:21:31] not but

[1:21:32] emptiness.

[1:21:33] Grizzly stew.

[1:21:36] So yeah,

[1:21:37] Demolition Man

[1:21:38] is a movie

[1:21:38] where the

[1:21:39] greatest

[1:21:40] sleaze

[1:21:40] tell us

[1:21:41] what it is.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:43] This little

[1:21:44] known indie

[1:21:45] hit,

[1:21:46] indie film.

[1:21:47] Was it even

[1:21:48] a hit when it

[1:21:49] came out?

[1:21:49] I don't know.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:50] It was a

[1:21:51] minor success,

[1:21:52] I believe.

[1:21:53] Oh,

[1:21:53] the miners

[1:21:54] liked it.

[1:21:54] Played real

[1:21:55] well in

[1:21:55] Harlan County,

[1:21:56] Kentucky.

[1:21:57] They don't

[1:21:57] really have

[1:21:57] much else to

[1:21:58] watch down in the

[1:21:59] mines.

[1:21:59] projected on

[1:22:00] the bare rock.

Stuart Wellington

[1:22:01] The strong

[1:22:01] whose side

[1:22:02] are you on

[1:22:02] platform that

[1:22:03] Sylvester

[1:22:03] Sloan stands

[1:22:04] for.

[1:22:05] Okay,

[1:22:05] so Demolition

[1:22:07] Man is about

[1:22:08] the greatest

[1:22:08] cop in the

[1:22:09] universe

[1:22:09] fighting an

[1:22:11] evil drug

[1:22:11] dealer,

[1:22:12] and they

[1:22:12] both end up

[1:22:13] getting charged

[1:22:14] with a crime

[1:22:15] and frozen,

[1:22:16] and then they

[1:22:17] wake up far in

[1:22:18] the future,

[1:22:18] and they get

[1:22:19] into all kinds

[1:22:19] of wacky

[1:22:20] adventures,

[1:22:21] and the

[1:22:22] villain in

[1:22:22] this case

[1:22:22] is played

[1:22:23] by Wesley

[1:22:23] Snipes,

[1:22:24] and this

[1:22:24] is genuinely

[1:22:25] a great

[1:22:26] over-the-top

[1:22:28] cartoony

[1:22:28] performance that

[1:22:29] would have not

[1:22:30] been out of

[1:22:31] place in any

[1:22:32] of the Tim

[1:22:32] Burton

[1:22:32] Batman movies.

[1:22:34] It's great.

[1:22:36] It's almost

[1:22:37] worth watching

[1:22:37] just on that

[1:22:38] energy alone,

[1:22:39] and it's the

[1:22:39] sort of thing,

[1:22:40] it's the sort

[1:22:40] of performance

[1:22:41] where you're

[1:22:41] like,

[1:22:42] kind of

[1:22:43] surprised that

[1:22:43] Wesley Snipes

[1:22:44] isn't a

[1:22:44] bigger star

[1:22:45] because he

[1:22:46] is so much

[1:22:47] fun to watch

[1:22:47] in this movie.

[1:22:48] I mean,

[1:22:48] he was a,

Elliott Kalan

[1:22:49] he has been a

[1:22:49] huge star.

[1:22:50] He's gone

[1:22:51] through his

[1:22:51] ups and downs.

[1:22:52] I mean,

Elliott Kalan

[1:22:52] he's fallen

[1:22:52] on hard times,

[1:22:53] I suppose.

[1:22:53] I mean,

[1:22:54] not paying your

[1:22:54] taxes for many

[1:22:55] years,

[1:22:56] and then having

[1:22:56] to pay them

[1:22:57] all at once

[1:22:57] will do that

[1:22:57] to you.

Stuart Wellington

[1:22:58] Yeah,

[1:22:58] I suppose.

[1:22:59] So,

[1:23:00] if you get a

[1:23:00] chance,

[1:23:01] if you haven't

[1:23:01] already seen it,

[1:23:02] you should go

[1:23:02] check it out.

[1:23:03] It's a great

[1:23:04] example of a

[1:23:04] good,

[1:23:04] bad movie,

[1:23:06] and you can

[1:23:07] finally find out

[1:23:08] what the three

[1:23:09] seashells in the

[1:23:10] bathroom are all

[1:23:11] about.

Elliott Kalan

[1:23:11] You don't know

[1:23:11] how to use

[1:23:12] those?

[1:23:12] Ha,

[1:23:12] ha,

[1:23:13] ha,

[1:23:13] ha.

[1:23:13] It also has

[1:23:14] perhaps the

Stuart Wellington

[1:23:15] most gratuitous

[1:23:16] piece of nudity

Elliott Kalan

[1:23:17] in any film

[1:23:18] ever.

[1:23:18] Yeah.

[1:23:19] Where Sylvester

[1:23:20] Sloan just gets

[1:23:21] a wrong video

[1:23:22] phone call from

[1:23:23] a nude lady,

[1:23:23] and that's the

[1:23:24] entirety of it.

[1:23:25] She goes,

[1:23:25] oh,

Stuart Wellington

[1:23:26] I'm sorry,

[1:23:26] I thought you

[1:23:26] were someone

[1:23:27] else.

[1:23:27] And now that

[1:23:28] we have video

[1:23:28] phone calls,

[1:23:29] you know that

[1:23:30] shit happens

[1:23:30] all the time.

[1:23:32] Constantly.

Elliott Kalan

[1:23:32] People are

[1:23:32] constantly

[1:23:33] misdialing their

[1:23:34] video phone numbers.

Stuart Wellington

[1:23:35] Okay,

[1:23:36] so Dan,

[1:23:36] now that you

[1:23:37] can't recommend

Dan McCoy

[1:23:37] Demolition Man.

[1:23:40] Damn you.

[1:23:41] I'm gonna

[1:23:42] take a page

[1:23:43] from Elliot's

[1:23:44] playbook.

[1:23:45] I'm gonna

[1:23:45] recommend a

[1:23:46] movie from

[1:23:46] 1935.

[1:23:47] Just don't

[1:23:48] from my

[1:23:48] Playboy.

[1:23:50] What if

[1:23:51] it's one of

[1:23:51] those terrible

[1:23:52] joke pages?

[1:23:53] You can take

[1:23:53] those.

[1:23:54] Those are

[1:23:54] pretty bad.

[1:23:55] Or if it's

[1:23:56] an article

[1:23:56] about travel.

[1:23:58] Yeah,

[1:23:58] or some

[1:23:59] Norman Mailer

[1:24:00] article.

[1:24:02] Or Norman

[1:24:02] Mailer.

[1:24:02] I'm not

[1:24:03] familiar with

[1:24:03] his work

[1:24:03] either.

[1:24:04] He's

[1:24:05] French.

[1:24:05] Norman Mailer

[1:24:06] plus manure.

[1:24:08] So,

[1:24:09] 1935,

[1:24:11] the version

[1:24:13] of A Midsummer

[1:24:14] Night's Dream

[1:24:14] that was

[1:24:15] done,

[1:24:17] and it

[1:24:18] had Olivia

[1:24:18] de Havilland

[1:24:19] as Titania.

[1:24:21] It had

[1:24:21] Jimmy Cagney

[1:24:22] as Bottom.

[1:24:24] It had

[1:24:25] Dick Powell

[1:24:26] as Lissander,

[1:24:28] I believe.

[1:24:28] I think so.

[1:24:29] And Joey

[1:24:29] Brown is

[1:24:30] another one of

[1:24:30] the mechanicals.

[1:24:32] The joiner.

Elliott Kalan

[1:24:34] It's

[1:24:34] It was the

[1:24:36] film version

[1:24:37] of the

[1:24:37] Max Reinhardt

[1:24:39] production.

Dan McCoy

[1:24:40] I believe

[1:24:40] that's correct.

[1:24:42] And it's

[1:24:43] to my taste,

[1:24:45] I know Elliot

[1:24:46] and I talked

[1:24:46] about this

[1:24:47] and we had

[1:24:47] minor disagreement.

[1:24:48] To my taste,

[1:24:49] there's a little

[1:24:49] too much

[1:24:50] gauzy

[1:24:51] photography

[1:24:52] of fairies

[1:24:53] running around.

Elliott Kalan

[1:24:54] Which I think

[1:24:54] is the biggest

[1:24:56] strong point

[1:24:56] of the movie.

[1:24:56] That's a movie

[1:24:57] I really like

[1:24:58] a lot.

[1:24:58] And the thing

[1:24:59] I like the most

[1:24:59] about it

[1:25:00] is the

[1:25:01] 30s

[1:25:02] gauzy

[1:25:02] photographed

[1:25:03] choreography

[1:25:04] where there's

[1:25:04] just nymphs

[1:25:05] running around

[1:25:06] a forest

[1:25:07] with a lot

[1:25:08] of glitter

[1:25:08] everywhere.

[1:25:10] It happens

[1:25:11] a lot.

[1:25:12] I like that

[1:25:12] aspect of it.

Dan McCoy

[1:25:14] If you like

[1:25:14] that,

[1:25:14] then you'll

[1:25:15] love

[1:25:15] the 35

[1:25:17] Midsummer Night

[1:25:17] String.

Elliott Kalan

[1:25:18] James Cagney

[1:25:19] is really good

[1:25:19] in it.

[1:25:19] Joey Brown

[1:25:20] is really

Dan McCoy

[1:25:20] funny.

[1:25:21] Yeah,

[1:25:21] the rude

[1:25:22] mechanical stuff

[1:25:23] is very funny.

[1:25:24] I think it's

[1:25:25] probably the

[1:25:25] strongest stuff

[1:25:26] in the movie.

[1:25:27] It's an

[1:25:27] interesting movie

[1:25:28] to watch.

[1:25:29] I'm a big

[1:25:30] fan of the

[1:25:30] play.

[1:25:31] It's an

[1:25:31] interesting movie

[1:25:31] to watch

[1:25:32] to see how

[1:25:33] much they

[1:25:34] cut down

[1:25:34] the play.

[1:25:35] Even though

[1:25:36] the movie

[1:25:36] is over

[1:25:37] two hours

[1:25:38] long.

[1:25:39] It's like

[1:25:39] 2.15

[1:25:39] or something

[1:25:40] like that.

[1:25:40] There's

Dan McCoy

[1:25:40] whole wide

[1:25:44] swaths of

[1:25:45] dialogue that's

[1:25:46] just replaced

[1:25:47] by people

[1:25:48] making various

[1:25:48] faces at each

[1:25:49] other.

Elliott Kalan

[1:25:50] The only

[1:25:51] thing I

[1:25:51] really don't

[1:25:52] like in

[1:25:52] that movie

[1:25:52] is Mickey

[1:25:53] Rooney's

[1:25:54] performance

[1:25:54] as Puck.

[1:25:55] Mickey Rooney

[1:25:55] is terrible

[1:25:56] as Puck.

[1:25:56] He's just

[1:25:56] very

[1:25:57] irritating.

Dan McCoy

[1:25:58] He's so

[1:25:59] irritating.

[1:26:00] I mean

[1:26:00] Mickey Rooney

[1:26:01] can go

[1:26:02] broad

[1:26:02] a lot of

[1:26:05] the time

[1:26:06] but this

[1:26:07] is him

[1:26:07] as a

[1:26:08] child

[1:26:08] and he

[1:26:09] has this

[1:26:10] weird

[1:26:10] I'm an

[1:26:11] old man

[1:26:12] but a

[1:26:12] child

[1:26:13] quality

[1:26:13] about him

[1:26:14] and he

[1:26:15] does this

[1:26:15] laugh

[1:26:16] like every

[1:26:17] other line

[1:26:17] that just

[1:26:18] goes like

[1:26:18] This horrible

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:21] braying

[1:26:21] thing.

[1:26:23] But

[1:26:24] I think

[1:26:26] that's a

[1:26:26] good movie.

[1:26:26] I think

[1:26:27] that's

[1:26:27] still the

[1:26:28] best film

[1:26:29] version of

[1:26:29] that play

[1:26:30] that I've

[1:26:30] seen.

Dan McCoy

[1:26:31] I think

[1:26:31] that's

[1:26:32] probably

[1:26:32] true.

[1:26:33] But that

[1:26:33] also is

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:34] damning

[1:26:35] very faint

[1:26:36] praise.

[1:26:38] I have

[1:26:39] seen better

[1:26:39] stage

[1:26:40] productions of

[1:26:40] it.

[1:26:41] Sure you

[1:26:42] have.

[1:26:43] Two come

[1:26:44] to mind.

[1:26:44] One in

[1:26:45] Stratford

[1:26:46] itself.

Stuart Wellington

[1:26:47] Oh wow.

[1:26:49] They're

[1:26:49] treading the

[1:26:50] boards.

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:51] I guess.

Dan McCoy

[1:26:53] If you're

[1:26:54] a fan of

[1:26:54] Midsommers

[1:26:55] at all

[1:26:55] you should

[1:26:55] watch the

[1:26:55] movie.

[1:26:56] That's

[1:26:57] what I

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:57] want to

[1:26:58] recommend.

[1:26:59] Midsommar

[1:26:59] night

[1:26:59] sex

[1:26:59] comedy.

[1:27:00] A

[1:27:00] really

[1:27:00] good

[1:27:00] movie

[1:27:00] with a

[1:27:01] terrible

[1:27:01] title.

[1:27:02] Sure.

[1:27:03] And I'm

[1:27:04] going to

[1:27:04] recommend a

[1:27:05] movie.

[1:27:06] I'm going to

[1:27:06] from the

[1:27:07] Elliot

[1:27:07] Kalin

[1:27:07] playbook

[1:27:08] and

[1:27:08] recommend

[1:27:08] an old

[1:27:09] movie that's

[1:27:09] also a

[1:27:09] foreign

[1:27:10] film.

[1:27:12] And I'm

[1:27:12] going to

[1:27:12] recommend

[1:27:12] you know

[1:27:13] what?

[1:27:14] Frank

[1:27:15] D'Angelo

[1:27:15] just wanted

[1:27:16] to make

[1:27:16] movies and

[1:27:17] it's not

[1:27:17] like he had

[1:27:17] training in

[1:27:21] it.

[1:27:21] And this

[1:27:22] movie was

[1:27:22] made in

[1:27:23] similar

[1:27:23] fashion by

[1:27:24] a little

[1:27:24] man named

[1:27:25] Satyajit

[1:27:25] Ray from

[1:27:27] India.

[1:27:27] And this

[1:27:27] is his

[1:27:28] first film

[1:27:28] Pater Panchali

[1:27:29] which I've

[1:27:30] been putting

[1:27:30] off watching

[1:27:31] for years

[1:27:32] because even

[1:27:33] though I love

[1:27:34] old movies and

[1:27:35] I love old

[1:27:35] foreign movies

[1:27:36] and I love

[1:27:36] foreign movies

[1:27:36] I still

[1:27:37] every now and

[1:27:38] then get

[1:27:38] that feeling

[1:27:38] of like

[1:27:39] this is

[1:27:41] going to

[1:27:41] be not as

[1:27:42] enjoyable as

[1:27:43] it is like

[1:27:43] good for

[1:27:44] me.

[1:27:44] But Pater

[1:27:45] Panchali is

[1:27:45] like a

[1:27:45] genuinely

[1:27:46] like beautiful

[1:27:47] entertaining

[1:27:48] movie and

[1:27:49] it's really

[1:27:49] heartbreaking

[1:27:50] and really

[1:27:50] good.

[1:27:51] It's from

[1:27:51] the 50s

[1:27:52] and it's

[1:27:54] a film

[1:27:54] about

[1:27:55] rural

[1:27:56] Indian

[1:27:57] poverty

[1:27:57] but about

[1:27:58] one family

[1:27:59] a husband

[1:27:59] and wife

[1:28:00] the husband

[1:28:00] has dreams

[1:28:01] of being

[1:28:01] a writer

[1:28:02] but he's

[1:28:02] just kind

[1:28:02] of not

[1:28:03] supporting

[1:28:03] his family

[1:28:04] the wife

[1:28:05] is the one

[1:28:05] the pressure

[1:28:05] falls on

[1:28:06] and they

[1:28:06] have two

[1:28:07] kids

[1:28:07] an older

[1:28:09] daughter

[1:28:09] and a younger

[1:28:09] son

[1:28:10] and there's

[1:28:11] a certain

[1:28:12] amount of

[1:28:13] slice of

[1:28:13] lifeness

[1:28:14] to it

[1:28:14] but there's

[1:28:14] a lot

[1:28:15] of

[1:28:16] tight

[1:28:16] plotting

[1:28:16] in it

[1:28:17] also

[1:28:17] and I

[1:28:18] like

[1:28:18] don't

[1:28:19] want to

[1:28:19] like

[1:28:19] talk

[1:28:19] it's

[1:28:20] like

[1:28:20] to describe

[1:28:20] the plot

[1:28:21] is not

[1:28:21] to describe

[1:28:22] what's

[1:28:22] interesting

[1:28:22] about it

[1:28:23] but it's

[1:28:23] like a

[1:28:23] beautiful

[1:28:24] looking film

[1:28:25] and the

[1:28:26] emotions in it

[1:28:26] are really

[1:28:27] strong

[1:28:27] and the

[1:28:27] performances

[1:28:28] are really

[1:28:28] great

[1:28:29] and it's

[1:28:29] one of those

[1:28:30] movies where

[1:28:30] you're like

[1:28:30] this was his

[1:28:31] the director's

[1:28:32] first movie

[1:28:33] a number of the

[1:28:34] actors in it

[1:28:34] were not

[1:28:35] professional actors

[1:28:36] at the time

[1:28:36] like that's

[1:28:37] crazy

[1:28:37] this is such

[1:28:38] a good movie

[1:28:39] so I highly

[1:28:40] recommend it

[1:28:40] pay through

[1:28:41] panchali

[1:28:41] yeah

Stuart Wellington

[1:28:42] okay

[1:28:42] three

[1:28:43] equally

[1:28:43] good

[1:28:44] movies

Elliott Kalan

[1:28:44] that's

[1:28:45] right

[1:28:45] yeah

[1:28:45] one

[1:28:46] one

[1:28:47] is

[1:28:47] one

[1:28:48] of

[1:28:48] the

[1:28:48] hallmarks

[1:28:48] of

[1:28:48] Indian

[1:28:48] cinema

[1:28:49] and then

[1:28:49] you've

[1:28:49] got

[1:28:50] kind of

[1:28:51] golden age

[1:28:51] Hollywood

[1:28:52] adapting

[1:28:52] the greatest

[1:28:53] writer

[1:28:53] whoever

[1:28:54] existed

[1:28:54] and then

[1:28:55] you got

[1:28:55] Demolition

[1:28:56] Man

[1:28:56] the first

[1:28:58] I assume

[1:28:59] would be a

[1:28:59] Sylvester Sloan

[1:29:00] Rob Schneider

[1:29:01] double feature

[1:29:02] with Judge

[1:29:02] Dredd

[1:29:03] yeah

[1:29:03] also a

[1:29:05] futuristic

[1:29:05] adventure

[1:29:06] if only

[1:29:07] Dennis Leary

[1:29:07] had also

[1:29:07] been in

[1:29:08] Judge

[1:29:08] Dredd

Dan McCoy

[1:29:09] the Three Musketeers

[1:29:11] they called

[1:29:11] them

[1:29:11] yep

Elliott Kalan

[1:29:12] because they

[1:29:13] loved the

[1:29:14] candy bar

[1:29:14] of the same

[1:29:15] name

[1:29:15] hey Rob

[1:29:19] had me

[1:29:19] another

[1:29:19] candy bar

[1:29:20] so

[1:29:21] hey guys

[1:29:23] I heard you

[1:29:24] were talking

[1:29:24] about Demolition

[1:29:25] Man

[1:29:25] so I had

[1:29:25] to stop

[1:29:26] by

[1:29:26] but the

[1:29:27] episode's

[1:29:27] running a

[1:29:28] little long

[1:29:28] so I just

[1:29:29] realized I

[1:29:29] started a bit

[1:29:29] that's not a

[1:29:30] good idea

[1:29:31] so I think

[1:29:31] I'm probably

[1:29:31] going to get

[1:29:32] going

Stuart Wellington

[1:29:32] questions about

[1:29:34] your character

[1:29:34] John Spartan

[1:29:35] don't really

[1:29:36] remember it

[1:29:36] too much

[1:29:37] what was the

Elliott Kalan

[1:29:38] name of

[1:29:38] Wesley Snipes'

[1:29:39] character

[1:29:39] like

[1:29:39] Jimmy

[1:29:39] Phoenix

[1:29:40] anyway

[1:29:42] go see

[1:29:43] whatever movie

[1:29:44] I have in

[1:29:44] theaters right

[1:29:44] now

[1:29:45] is there

[1:29:45] something out

[1:29:46] I don't

[1:29:46] know

[1:29:46] I don't

[1:29:47] think so

[1:29:47] well get

[1:29:48] Creed on

[1:29:49] DVD

[1:29:49] people loved

[1:29:51] it

[1:29:52] and I'm

[1:29:53] sure I'll

[1:29:53] be back

[1:29:54] at some

[1:29:54] point

[1:29:55] you know

[1:29:55] it's always

[1:29:56] good to see

[1:29:56] you

[1:29:57] you just

[1:29:59] opened your

Stuart Wellington

[1:30:00] new bar

[1:30:01] yeah it's

[1:30:01] been really

[1:30:02] successful

[1:30:02] we carry

[1:30:03] bullet

[1:30:04] bourbon

Elliott Kalan

[1:30:05] oh like my

[1:30:06] movie bullet

[1:30:06] to the head

[1:30:07] yeah Dan

[1:30:07] you've got a

[1:30:08] lot of

[1:30:08] good things

[1:30:09] going on

[1:30:09] no that's

[1:30:09] not true

[1:30:10] at all

[1:30:10] okay gotta

[1:30:11] go

[1:30:12] well you

[1:30:12] know

[1:30:12] even old

[1:30:13] sly knows

[1:30:14] when he's

[1:30:14] put his foot

[1:30:15] in the old

[1:30:15] mouth so

[1:30:16] I'm just

[1:30:18] gonna go

[1:30:18] okay

Stuart Wellington

[1:30:19] he always has

[1:30:21] his jetpack

[1:30:21] with him

[1:30:22] I hope

[1:30:22] Elliot comes

[1:30:23] back soon

[1:30:23] he's gonna

[1:30:24] be so mad

[1:30:24] he missed

[1:30:25] sly again

Elliott Kalan

[1:30:25] I'm back

[1:30:26] guys I

[1:30:26] didn't miss

[1:30:27] anything right

[1:30:27] I just went

[1:30:27] to get some

[1:30:28] more

[1:30:28] cheetos

[1:30:29] anything

[1:30:29] at all

[1:30:30] so

Stuart Wellington

[1:30:31] I just

[1:30:32] want to

[1:30:32] thank

[1:30:32] everybody

[1:30:33] who came

[1:30:33] out to

[1:30:33] the

[1:30:34] MaxFun

[1:30:34] meetup

[1:30:34] there was

[1:30:36] a lot

[1:30:36] of folks

[1:30:36] that I

[1:30:36] hadn't met

[1:30:37] before

[1:30:37] and that

[1:30:37] was really

[1:30:38] great to

[1:30:38] meet so many

[1:30:38] nice cool

[1:30:39] folks who

[1:30:40] came out to

[1:30:40] the meetup

[1:30:41] what a week

[1:30:42] ago at the

[1:30:43] bar I just

[1:30:43] opened

[1:30:43] it was really

[1:30:44] humbling to

[1:30:45] just meet all

[1:30:46] these really nice

[1:30:47] people and get

[1:30:47] that kind of

[1:30:48] support

[1:30:48] and Dan

[1:30:50] had a great

[1:30:51] time too

[1:30:51] yeah I was

[1:30:52] also there

[1:30:53] I missed

[1:30:55] it but I

[1:30:55] regretted

[1:30:55] missing it

[1:30:56] hopefully we'll

[1:30:57] get to do

[1:30:57] more of those

[1:30:58] things it's

[1:30:59] super fun

[1:31:00] and if you

[1:31:01] didn't come out

[1:31:02] because you

[1:31:03] were worried

[1:31:03] that you

[1:31:04] wouldn't know

[1:31:04] anybody you

[1:31:05] should come

[1:31:05] out and come

[1:31:06] and talk to

[1:31:07] me because

[1:31:07] a lot of

[1:31:08] those things I

[1:31:09] mainly spend the

[1:31:09] time standing

[1:31:10] around wondering

[1:31:11] who I can

[1:31:12] talk to

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:12] feel free to

[1:31:13] just walk up

[1:31:13] to Stuart and

[1:31:14] tell him you

[1:31:14] don't listen to

[1:31:15] the Flophouse

Stuart Wellington

[1:31:15] yeah please

[1:31:16] do that

[1:31:17] people feel

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:18] fine doing

[1:31:18] that apparently

Stuart Wellington

[1:31:19] in between

[1:31:20] meetups you

[1:31:21] can also check

[1:31:22] out the

[1:31:22] Flophouse on

[1:31:23] YouTube just

[1:31:24] check out

[1:31:24] Flophouse

[1:31:24] podcast there's

[1:31:25] a lot of

[1:31:26] really great

[1:31:26] stuff specifically

[1:31:27] there's some

[1:31:28] really great

[1:31:28] stuff that's

[1:31:28] made for that

[1:31:29] podcast for

[1:31:31] our podcast for

[1:31:32] that YouTube

[1:31:33] channel by

[1:31:34] by Tony

[1:31:35] Oker which

[1:31:36] are great

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:36] animated

[1:31:37] adaptations

[1:31:38] including a

[1:31:39] recent one

Stuart Wellington

[1:31:39] featuring

[1:31:40] featuring

[1:31:41] Silvester

[1:31:42] Salone

[1:31:43] yeah oh

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:44] man I hope

[1:31:44] I'm here the

[1:31:44] next time he

[1:31:45] stops by I

[1:31:45] always miss

[1:31:46] him

Stuart Wellington

[1:31:46] Dan and I

[1:31:48] look at each

[1:31:48] other awkwardly

[1:31:49] and then and

[1:31:51] yeah and if

[1:31:51] you're looking for

[1:31:52] any

[1:31:52] Christmas

[1:31:54] presents

[1:31:54] or whatever

[1:31:56] man just

[1:31:56] just because

[1:31:57] presents

[1:31:57] don't forget

[1:31:58] that we got

[1:31:59] merch available

[1:32:00] at the Max

[1:32:00] Fun store

[1:32:01] including a

[1:32:02] really awesome

[1:32:03] poster by the

[1:32:04] artist Tom

[1:32:04] Fowler where

[1:32:05] all of our

[1:32:06] proceeds for

[1:32:07] it go directly

[1:32:08] to the

[1:32:08] American Foundation

[1:32:09] for Suicide

[1:32:10] Prevention a

[1:32:10] great cause

[1:32:11] okay

Elliott Kalan

[1:32:11] thanks Stu

[1:32:14] for that

[1:32:14] housework

[1:32:15] this episode

[1:32:16] was so

[1:32:16] packed full of

[1:32:17] experiences we

[1:32:18] watched a

[1:32:18] really crazy

[1:32:19] funny movie

[1:32:20] we celebrated

[1:32:21] nine years

[1:32:21] together

[1:32:22] we talked

[1:32:23] about we

[1:32:23] talked about

[1:32:23] the Holocaust

[1:32:24] and Robert

[1:32:25] Loja

[1:32:25] a fair amount

[1:32:26] and recommended

[1:32:28] some movies

[1:32:28] had some laughs

[1:32:29] said hello

[1:32:29] to some people

[1:32:30] said sup to

[1:32:31] one person in

[1:32:32] particular

[1:32:32] yeah

[1:32:32] Helen

[1:32:34] sup Helen

Dan McCoy

[1:32:36] the taking of

[1:32:37] Helen one two

[1:32:37] three

[1:32:38] well I hope

[1:32:40] that Helen has

[1:32:41] a good time

[1:32:41] I hope that

[1:32:42] you've all had

[1:32:43] a good time

[1:32:43] but all good

[1:32:45] time

[1:32:45] gotta come to

[1:32:46] an end

[1:32:46] and we're

[1:32:47] dying

[1:32:48] so as we

[1:32:50] put ourselves

[1:32:51] into a grave

[1:32:52] into an eternal

[1:32:53] sleep

[1:32:54] we sign off

[1:32:56] saying I've

[1:32:58] been Dan

[1:32:58] McCoy

[1:32:59] and this guy's

[1:33:00] been Stuart

[1:33:01] Wellington

[1:33:01] and over here

[1:33:03] still tiny

[1:33:03] Elliot Kalin

Elliott Kalan

[1:33:04] goodnight

[1:33:05] everyone

[1:33:06] small member

[1:33:07] small member

[1:33:08] so this is just

[1:33:13] like Godzilla

[1:33:13] it's a real

[1:33:14] New York

[1:33:14] movie

[1:33:15] hell yeah

[1:33:16] how are my

[1:33:17] levels

[1:33:18] leveling up

Stuart Wellington

[1:33:20] how are my

[1:33:21] levels

[1:33:21] this is how

[1:33:23] I'm gonna

[1:33:23] talk the whole

[1:33:24] time

[1:33:26] like that

[1:33:26] just like this

[1:33:28] I'm gonna

[1:33:28] talk like this

[1:33:29] and now

Elliott Kalan

[1:33:30] I'm gonna

[1:33:31] talk like this

[1:33:32] sometimes too

[1:33:33] I will talk

[1:33:34] like this

[1:33:35] like a robot

[1:33:36] the whole episode

[1:33:37] it won't get

[1:33:38] annoying I promise

[1:33:39] alright

[1:33:42] yeah I guess

[1:33:43] you gotta do

[1:33:43] the hand

[1:33:43] motions

[1:33:44] I'm doing

[1:33:45] them even

[1:33:45] though they

[1:33:46] cannot hear

[1:33:46] for realism

[1:33:47] you can hear

[1:33:48] the confidence

[1:33:49] of the hand

[1:33:50] motions in

[1:33:50] the voice

[1:33:51] it helps

[1:33:52] my performance

[1:33:53] posture

Stuart Wellington

[1:33:54] that was the

[1:33:56] directing you

[1:33:57] gave during

[1:33:58] MST3K

[1:33:59] right

[1:33:59] I said

[1:34:00] hey

[1:34:01] move like a

Elliott Kalan

[1:34:01] robot

[1:34:02] while you're

[1:34:02] saying those

[1:34:03] things

[1:34:04] robot

Stuart Wellington

[1:34:07] robot

[1:34:11] robot

[1:34:11] boom operator

Elliott Kalan

[1:34:15] boom operator

[1:34:19] that's the

[1:34:20] that's the

[1:34:21] farthest I've

[1:34:21] ever gotten

[1:34:21] with that

[1:34:22] parody

[1:34:22] I've been

[1:34:22] thinking about

[1:34:23] it for a

[1:34:23] while

[1:34:23] yeah

[1:34:24] that's pretty

[1:34:24] good

Dan McCoy

[1:34:24] maximumfun.org

[1:34:27] comedy and

[1:34:28] culture

[1:34:28] artist owned

[1:34:30] listener supported

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