Ep.#405 - The Legend of the Roller Blade Seven

[0:00] On this episode we discuss the legend of the roller

[0:31] Hey everyone and welcome to the Flophouse. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington

[0:37] I'm Elliot Kaelin and I can't wait to tell you later in the show about how you can see our online live shows and

[0:43] Our in-person live show in Los Angeles on October 19th at videotsfoundation.org, but I'll tell you about that later in the show

[0:50] Yeah, do that later right now. Let me explain what this is that you're listening to. This is a podcast. Oh, wow

[0:58] Are you really starting with first

[1:00] Have you heard of a thing called really simple syndication? It's abbreviated as RSS. Okay

[1:08] That's what they say. Keep it really simple syndication stupid

[1:13] normally and

[1:14] Today we talked about a bad movie

[1:20] Dan qualifications McCoy

[1:23] Of

[1:26] September which means that in Flophouse lore it is small timber or small vendor. Thank you depending on which

[1:33] sect you belong to

[1:35] where you worship

[1:37] And we are in the midst of our 90s flashback, even though these films are in no way. I'm sure

[1:45] big enough to

[1:47] be affected by strike stuff we are going back in time and

[1:52] this case we were talking about a film called the legend of the rollerblade 7 part of the

[1:58] Rollerblade 7 series of films being charitable by calling it a film

[2:05] As Stu pointed out we uh, we watched the legend of the Titanic this is the legend of the rollerblade 7

[2:11] We're going through all of the important legend

[2:14] in mythology

[2:17] Yeah

[2:18] the rollerblade 7 and how they

[2:20] Now which now which movie are the seven?

[2:24] so that's the thing this movie implies that we do know the legend of the rollerblade 7 because they don't explain anything and

[2:30] But let's do it. We'll get into summary. But Stu first let's let's talk about the production history of this film

[2:35] What is that? So this is the third in a series, correct?

[2:37] Now often the third in a movie series is an original new movie, but in this case, what did they do?

[2:42] It's a it's a mishmash of the first two, right it combines the content in the first

[2:48] It's like the way that Shogun assassin combines various lone wolf and cub movies to a single movie that is then dubbed into English

[2:55] Yes

[2:56] they combined footage from the rollerblade 7 and return of the rollerblade 7 into

[3:00] legend of the rollerblade 7 one would I was not aware of this one would think that if you're taking sort of that kind

[3:06] of like best of

[3:08] Approach with a lot of material to choose from you would end up with a more sort of fleet and focused

[3:17] Overestimating how much how much material how much great material they had to choose from now

[3:22] I think the easiest way I think the before we really get into this movie

[3:26] We really have to address the fact that it is the creation of

[3:30] What screenwriter star?

[3:32] Screenwriter is in quotes, I guess. Hmm. What Scott Shaw is

[3:36] So star and martial artist

[3:40] Scott Shaw and

[3:42] Director Donald G Jackson best known probably for Hell Comes to Frog Down. Mm-hmm. Yes, which is a movie that I recall

[3:50] basically enjoying and having a

[3:53] Comprehensible plot. It's I'd go as far as to call it Rowdy Roddy Piper's second best movie

[3:58] Yeah, very far behind his first best movie. They live which is great. But you know, it's it's it's a movie that has

[4:05] Has that yeah has a story it looks like it was made using money to pay for things

[4:09] Okay, so but the the key to this to Legend of the Rollerblades 7 is that it uses

[4:16] It implements Zen filmmaking. Yes Zen filmmaking at least according to Wikipedia

[4:22] Is that it is a method of filmmaking where you just film whatever you want and I don't think you have a script

[4:28] You do not have a script. No. Yeah, the film is built as it goes

[4:33] When when we make fun of a movie and you're listening to the the episode with your grandma and your grandma's like oh

[4:40] But everybody works so hard on this and in this case you can say well

[4:44] They didn't even have a script and they just did whatever they wanted. So I guess didn't work that hard work that hard

[4:49] I got I also

[4:51] That's what you tell your grandma

[4:53] Yeah, because Mike I I do often discuss Zen filmmaking with my grandma and especially the Rollerblades 7 films. She's a diehard

[5:00] I presume and I may be wrong. Well, your grandma was in die. Oh, yeah. Yeah. My grandma is Alan Rickman

[5:11] She actually faked her death and so that she could go back to being my grandma full-time

[5:16] That's very sweet of her. Yeah

[5:19] She's like Rihanna's she's like it's time for me to take care of my family and not be a movie star anymore

[5:23] I may be wrong in making Alan Rick Moranis is the person I'm talking to the combination of Alan Rickman and yeah

[5:30] but like a boba hotep version I

[5:34] May be wrong in presuming this but I kind of presume that if this is the way the movie was made. Mm-hmm. It was probably

[5:42] Maybe I'm wrong shot in sequence, which is not a thing that

[5:46] Movies normally are done, you know

[5:48] Like occasionally a film will be shot in sequence if the directors like I think it's very important to like go through this

[5:54] journey, like

[5:56] Only ET was shot in sequence Dan. Yeah, well weirdly enough boy not shot in sequence

[6:02] No, boy was not a secret ET my understanding is that because Spielberg wanted the relationship between

[6:08] The child actors and ET to be as real as possible. Okay, you've kind of replicated that

[6:14] well

[6:14] I bring it up only to say that there are some shots towards the beginning of this movie where I'm like

[6:18] Oh, these are like like it like I have no idea what's going on

[6:21] Individually, these are some very like pretty shots like that that look good for the budget like our sort of cleverly in that

[6:30] low-budget way using

[6:32] Abandoned spaces or weird-looking buildings or whatever to create a world and then as the movie went on

[6:39] I just felt like he'd got lazy

[6:41] So I think it's hard

[6:42] I think my guess is that some of that is probably the the the result of it being

[6:47] Literally constructed out of the footage from two other movies and that may be the better stuff might be from the first movie and the

[6:53] Good stuff from the second movie, but I'm not sure also even in that

[6:56] That's the movie does it like characters don't make sense from one scene to the next and they do there's a good

[7:03] there's an interesting use of

[7:05] Los Angeles area

[7:07] Locations, you know, they're very much at using at least an establishing shot of the Griffith Park Observatory

[7:12] At one point and they're in another place that I think might be Vasquez rocks, which is a really cool

[7:19] kind of

[7:21] Desert area, but could be any the LA River that you see in a lot of films those that concrete drainage thing

[7:27] You'd recognize. Yeah, the thing about in breakfast at Tiffany's LA

[7:31] River

[7:33] higher than a mile, so

[7:35] Stewart you have the unenviable task of trying to

[7:39] Synopsize this film. Let's see how I'm gonna do my fucking best, but it was it it was a challenge

[7:45] the challenges presented me were

[7:48] the fact that this movie was only available on YouTube and the sound mix is

[7:53] Bad bad, right? Yeah. Well, the other challenge is that this is not I think that we have

[8:00] Talked about it, but not maybe made it express. This is not a normal

[8:04] This is probably the least linearly told film we've ever done on the flophouse and it is one that is it is

[8:12] flake and I feel like Neil Breen watches this and he's like have these guys never seen a movie like this thing and

[8:19] But but are you gonna talk about the cavalcade of celebrity brothers that appear or do you want to introduce them as they show up?

[8:25] In the fair. Well, we'll get to all of them. So

[8:27] I mean to

[8:29] The movie the movie opens with a woman in a gymnastics bodysuit named Stella speed

[8:37] Which by the way, I fuck up some of these names you guys, please correct me. I had trouble following I cannot

[8:42] I don't know who any of the characters in this movie

[8:45] So we have Stella speed and she is given a samurai sword by Father Donaldo played by director

[8:52] The director of the movie and he gives her the sword before she goes into the dangerous

[8:57] Wheel zone which we'll later learn the wheel zone is a place where people can only skateboard and

[9:04] Ride around on rollerskates. Yes dangerous

[9:07] You will obviously see even though even though later the police officer character that we see enforcing this rule is herself not on wheels

[9:15] I mean you gotta admit though that this movie predicted

[9:18] The future, you know rollerblading is the major the only way we get around these days

[9:24] What's so funny is so later on and so we'll get to this the villain is time at how he invented escape

[9:29] He so he invented a skateboard and it ruined society as if he was like a nuclear scientist or something like that

[9:34] And anyway, we'll get to it

[9:35] So, okay

[9:36] although he's from that he's like it's like the Institute of Light or something like that the Institute of the Master of Light and he

[9:41] is he's like a

[9:42] Imagine a post-apocalyptic priest character who's like part cowboy part samurai. That's kind of the whole aesthetic. Yeah

[9:50] Apocalyptic, I mean like they're just wearing like pads and stuff. It's not like they actually aged any of their clothing

[9:55] Okay, it all looks new and they're in the desert a lot. Yeah. Yeah a lot of it looks like a

[10:00] like a Tom Petty music video,

[10:03] and I think that's probably intentional.

[10:05] So we then have, we have like an evil guy.

[10:09] I think this is, is this Joe Estevez at this point?

[10:11] Yes, this is Joe Estevez as Saint Offender.

[10:14] Yep, Saint Offender, who's some kind of a bad guy.

[10:17] And he, yeah, you would recognize him

[10:19] because he looks like-

[10:20] An Estevez.

[10:21] An Estevez, he looks like if Martin Sheen

[10:23] was not living life as well as he is being Martin Sheen.

[10:28] I mean, he looks like what he is,

[10:30] which is Martin Sheen's less successful brother, I guess.

[10:34] So he sends his henchmen outside of the Wheel Zone

[10:38] to kidnap a psychic named Sister Sparrow.

[10:44] So his reasoning is so he can get revenge.

[10:48] Again, that's not 100% clear at this point.

[10:50] He is one of three villains in the movie

[10:52] whose relationship to each other and goals

[10:54] are never entirely clear.

[10:55] Yes, so then we see Father Donato

[11:00] speaking with Sister Sparrow.

[11:01] She's a psychic.

[11:03] She wears like a weird little Pope smiter type thing

[11:06] and a pair of sunglasses.

[11:07] It's like a Pope smiter with a German cross on the top.

[11:10] Yes, yep, and she sees a vision of a samurai,

[11:18] a pacifist, and a clown, quite a trinity.

[11:24] And this also sees a plane crash

[11:27] and a naked bride covered in serpents.

[11:30] Wow, my notes early on were much more defined

[11:32] than later on, you'll see.

[11:35] When the movie starts, you're like,

[11:36] okay, this is a weird movie,

[11:37] but like there is some sort of plot

[11:40] that you can almost follow.

[11:41] Like there are things that are being explained and said

[11:44] and that all, it's like the movie dissolves away.

[11:46] Someone has been given a mission.

[11:49] Yes, yeah.

[11:51] So she, after this vision, she goes for a walk

[11:53] and is then kidnapped by a ninja.

[11:56] This happens multiple times.

[11:57] There's a lot of generic ninjas in this.

[11:59] Father Donato summons Hawk Goodman,

[12:03] played by Scott Shaw,

[12:04] who shows up to the Griffith Park Observatory

[12:07] and then walks around for a while.

[12:09] A long time.

[12:10] He, as to describe him, he looks again like

[12:14] some weird fantasy where Tom Petty

[12:16] is in a post-apocalyptic movie,

[12:18] but that would never happen in the real world, right?

[12:22] So he is a,

[12:25] Hawk Goodman is a samurai warrior

[12:27] who rides around on a motorcycle

[12:30] like a real street samurai.

[12:31] Yeah, and so the trivia for this movie

[12:35] claims that this actor is like

[12:38] one of the only like rated people

[12:41] to know this Korean martial art or whatever.

[12:44] It feels like trivia written by him

[12:46] because I will say that throughout the movie,

[12:48] he does not seem to be particularly adept

[12:51] at martial arts necessarily.

[12:53] I mean, he kicks higher than I could, that's for sure,

[12:56] but that's the best I'll say for him.

[12:57] The people challenging him, I feel like are not,

[12:59] are not really testing any skills,

[13:01] but he has written a number of books about taekwondo.

[13:04] Oh, cool, okay.

[13:06] So he, Father Donato

[13:11] wants him to go rescue Sister Sparrow,

[13:14] who is Hawk's actual sister.

[13:16] Her name is Sparrow Goodman.

[13:19] They almost make a joke about that.

[13:21] They kind of make a joke about how she's both his sister

[13:23] and a sister, like a nun.

[13:24] For his trouble,

[13:27] Hawk has promised a bride for doing this.

[13:32] And then Hawk rides his motorcycle to the wheel zone

[13:36] where he then has to leave his motorcycle

[13:37] because though it's a wheel zone,

[13:40] motorcycles don't have that kind of wheel.

[13:42] No, no, not at all.

[13:43] And then he leaves his motorcycle

[13:44] and then it just disappears.

[13:46] Yeah, motorcycle disappears.

[13:48] Magic motorcycle, it's kind of like the ZZ Top car.

[13:51] Yeah, oh man.

[13:53] See, I could have watched an hour and a half

[13:55] of ZZ Top videos.

[13:57] And you can do that on YouTube.

[13:59] Yeah, you have the option.

[14:00] Yeah, I can just do that whenever.

[14:02] We do live in the best of all possible worlds

[14:04] on that one rubric.

[14:06] Now we have kind of a series of character introductions

[14:10] with their credit, like who the actor is.

[14:15] The first one, of course, was,

[14:18] I thought of Dan McCoy immediately

[14:19] because it is Rhonda Shearer.

[14:22] I was so excited.

[14:24] I had no idea that Rhonda Shearer was in this movie

[14:27] before starting it.

[14:29] And I was like, what?

[14:32] I mean, like the funny thing about this movie,

[14:33] like as Stuart suggests,

[14:34] and I think we should go into more detail,

[14:36] is like as various characters are introduced,

[14:40] they get a big like credits.

[14:43] Title card.

[14:44] They get a full screen title card

[14:46] that says their name and their character.

[14:48] Or just the actor actually, right?

[14:49] It's the way.

[14:50] Just the actor.

[14:50] It's the same thing they kind of did in old silent films,

[14:54] where they would have the character name

[14:55] and the actor's name when the character was introduced,

[14:57] but here they just show the actor's name.

[14:59] Right, and this continues through like most of the movie.

[15:03] And it's funny, I really feel like it comes across

[15:07] like they're like,

[15:08] can you believe we got someone

[15:09] with a name you would recognize?

[15:11] Not like a star.

[15:13] None of these people are big,

[15:14] but like, hey look, we got Rhonda Shearer

[15:17] to be in this movie, and here she is.

[15:20] And her presence also meant that this movie

[15:23] was shown on USA Up all night, right?

[15:27] Yes, I believe so.

[15:28] So I mean, let's explain for the audience,

[15:29] for anyone who, it's hard to imagine anyone

[15:31] in the audience doesn't know who Rhonda Shearer is,

[15:33] but Dan, can you explain for anyone

[15:34] who's not as up on 90s late night soft core

[15:39] with the nudity cut out broadcasting as we are?

[15:41] For anyone who was not a pubescent boy

[15:46] in the late 80s, early 90s.

[15:49] Yes, Rhonda Shearer, best known for hosting USA Up all night,

[15:55] which one of the two hosts, Gilbert Gottfried,

[15:57] also hosted it.

[15:59] I believe he was on Fridays

[16:02] and she was on Saturdays or something.

[16:03] But this was a way of-

[16:06] Very similar energy from the two of them.

[16:08] Yeah, this was a way of repackaging trashy movies

[16:13] for late night viewing in the same way

[16:15] that you would have Vampyra or something

[16:19] do horror movies.

[16:20] But this would be Rhonda Shearer lounging about

[16:24] in lingerie or something, introducing-

[16:27] Lingerie, that's lingerie designed for lounging.

[16:30] Or whatever.

[16:31] I feel like a lot of it is.

[16:34] So she would show these like sex comedies

[16:36] with all the actual nudity cut out,

[16:38] but there would still be risque content, but yeah.

[16:41] It was a lot of thongs.

[16:42] It would be a lot of thongs and bikinis, yeah.

[16:45] And this obviously made a huge impression on me.

[16:50] And last I checked in on Rhonda Shearer,

[16:52] she was running a lingerie company

[16:55] and that was her late career turn, so.

[16:58] Well, in this movie, she plays Officer Skates,

[17:01] a police officer in the Wheel Zone.

[17:03] Officer Daryl Skates.

[17:05] Officer Daryl Skates.

[17:07] And she is shaking down a guy

[17:10] who looks kind of like a greaser type character,

[17:12] like a Tex Avery cartoon.

[17:14] It's heavily hinted that he is the Big Bopper

[17:17] and that that's the plane crash

[17:18] because later he's looking for Buddy Holly.

[17:21] And someone warns him,

[17:23] don't get on a plane because of a coin flip.

[17:25] At first I was like,

[17:26] oh, this is one of the millions of men

[17:29] who think Elvis is super cool and wants to be Elvis.

[17:31] And then I was like, oh no, wait,

[17:32] he's supposed to be the Big Bopper.

[17:34] What a weird, what a weird choice.

[17:35] He's there to bring some six-string samurai flavor

[17:37] to everything that's going on.

[17:38] I guess so, yeah.

[17:40] Okay, so Hawk is then, is traveling through the Wheel Zone.

[17:45] He is on foot, he does not have roller skates

[17:48] and he is surrounded by a roller blade gang,

[17:50] but he kills them all quite easily with a samurai sword.

[17:53] He tracks down Sister Sparrow

[17:56] and she has a group of gang wasteland warrior captors.

[18:04] And they have a brief fight that is stretched out

[18:07] because almost every kick or knife throw or knife trick

[18:12] is repeated four times, four to five times.

[18:15] Literally the exact footage is shown.

[18:16] Slow motion, yeah.

[18:17] Or different takes of the same thing, yeah.

[18:19] At one point, Hawk throws his sister a knife

[18:22] which she catches in her teeth

[18:24] and then she catches the butt of the knife in her teeth

[18:27] and then uses that knife to slash

[18:28] one of her captors' throats.

[18:31] But in context, I mean, like it looks like

[18:33] she's just kind of like vaguely jabbing towards someone.

[18:36] Yes, yeah.

[18:38] And yeah, I think sometimes these things

[18:41] are repeated up to six times.

[18:43] Up to six times.

[18:44] I would not be surprised if you took out

[18:46] all of the reused footage in this movie,

[18:48] the movie was one third as long.

[18:51] For sure, and I mean, the fact is

[18:53] the whole movie is reused footage too.

[18:54] I don't know if there's any new footage.

[18:56] But yeah, you're right, there's a lot.

[18:57] There's a, Stuart will get to it.

[18:58] There's a sequence at the very end

[19:00] where you see characters get into a car

[19:02] several different times over and over again.

[19:06] So he, but then Hawk, before he can save Sister Sparrow,

[19:10] Hawk is knocked down by a rollerblading metal

[19:15] minotaur ninja guy who will be introduced later.

[19:18] That's awesome.

[19:20] Wish I could have seen it.

[19:21] We are later introduced to this character

[19:24] as the Fukusai ninja.

[19:27] And he gets knocked out and then the bad guys

[19:29] just take the sister away.

[19:33] Hawk visits a psychic played by Karen Black named Taro.

[19:38] Yeah.

[19:39] Who he does psychedelics with her

[19:42] and they have a romantic vision quest

[19:45] and he learns how to rollerblade.

[19:46] Yeah, she gets one of the big.

[19:48] That's when he's learning how to rollerblade.

[19:49] I see, okay.

[19:51] He gets one of the big credits and she's the,

[19:54] you know, like, look, I love Rhonda Shear,

[19:57] but Karen Black is the one.

[20:00] Actual like actor of note in this is the only Academy Award nominee in the entire. Yeah, yeah, and

[20:07] I don't know you know like she must have gotten

[20:10] You know a nice little payday to spend one day feeding mushrooms

[20:15] I'm not so sure if it was such a nice little bit

[20:17] I think Karen black is kind of it was I mean she's since passed

[20:20] But was kind of a not an out-of-the-ordinary person. No you were saying that she's the only Academy Award nominee

[20:27] I was wondering if John Cazale was in this John

[20:34] He's only in movies that that were nominated for Best Picture, so I don't know wait wait wait

[20:39] Was this nominee for Best Picture let me hold on let me check let me look at the Academy website

[20:43] Let me start at the first year of the Academy Awards and move forward just do a fine. I'm not seeing it or

[20:49] 1929 no

[20:51] What if a movie about rollerblades from like the 50s one?

[20:55] No no Legend of the Rollerblades 7 was not nominated for Best Picture it turns out, okay, that's weird, okay, so um

[21:02] Wait let me double check where I'm at okay?

[21:05] Doesn't mean while sister Sparrow is been is captured. She is being tormented and forced to dance

[21:13] Uh-huh, okay, the big bopper character who we saw earlier has a chat with a

[21:20] Like this Oracle character who's sitting out on a like a beach chair in the desert

[21:26] Played by we get another credit like Dan shroud this is Don Stroud Don Stroud mine. Yeah, I

[21:34] Don't know this actors work. I don't think so maybe I wasn't as excited to see his name

[21:39] I I mean he's been in he's been in lots and lots of things. You know okay, I

[21:45] love this convention by the way of

[21:48] Sort of dystopian

[21:51] Action movies where like there's just be like vast expanses of

[21:56] Desert all around and then they're just like people sort of just standing around and I'm like

[22:02] Like where do you live?

[22:04] Here you're just waiting here for the protagonist to wander by what's going on later. He gets a lifeguard chair, right?

[22:11] Yeah, it's a lifeguard chair and a lot of these sequences are shot kind of like the the like love montage from

[22:19] Coola's ice where vanilla ice is running around the like

[22:22] Like partially built home with that girl or like riding his motorcycle out in the desert. That's what yeah

[22:28] Yeah, I'm just talking about cinema here guys. Yeah

[22:32] I

[22:35] Guess I'm yeah, so okay now we got another big star coming up. We have Frank Stallone playing the Black Knight

[22:42] Yeah, this is the other celebrity brother Frank. The Black Knight is one of the villain characters he

[22:49] Seems to exist in this weird world where he can like draw people into his realm

[22:55] Yeah, there's something kind of like David Lynch about this where he's like an evil force that

[23:01] Inhabits some other underworlds, but can yeah people can end up there, but we never see him anywhere else

[23:06] I'm sure there's nothing to do with the fact that a lot of these people are probably available for a day

[23:10] But yeah, so I think Joe Estevez is the only one of these kind of large middle-named people that appears in more than one

[23:17] Location in the film. Oh interesting. Yeah

[23:20] so yeah, the

[23:22] the Black Knight

[23:24] Has a face-off with Hawk

[23:27] It's unclear to me whether or not this takes place currently or in the past. I don't think it matters

[23:33] Yeah, I flashback, but I'm not sure the Black Knight offers Hawk power, but Hawk rejects him saying that he you know

[23:41] He'll he'll

[23:43] What like side with the forces of like heart and light or something?

[23:46] Yeah, there's a legend of the rule of blade 7 stuff

[23:49] This is the hero of the rule of blade 7 is always tempted and then rejects that temptation

[23:54] That's what Joseph Campbell said there's something so this movie has an interesting relationship with

[23:58] time and continuity because

[24:01] Throughout we're seeing Hawkeyes one way to put it

[24:03] Yeah

[24:03] We're seeing Hawkeyes if he's never been to the wheel zone before

[24:06] But the first time we meet him in the movie isn't he like the last time I went to the wheel zone I got

[24:11] It was no good. So it's a big day. I was very confused about what was happening when in this movie luckily

[24:17] It doesn't matter not if it matters. So Hawk is now traveling on one of those barren LA rivers and

[24:24] Comes across a clown warrior in Kabuki makeup. Yeah, they have very not like long like

[24:32] Not really a fight, but like a lot of posturing all the fights mainly seem like a lot of like slow movement and posturing

[24:40] Yes, and they they the camera like whips around them and then they are

[24:45] Attacked by like a gang and then they team up and fight together where at first

[24:50] Confusing to me because there's no dialogue during any of this. So I was like wait, so now they're friends

[24:56] I don't I don't yeah, and then they they team up with Stella speed the girl in the gymnastics outfit from earlier

[25:05] And now when you say gymnastics outfit, we should make it clear

[25:08] This is a red leotard with a thong back and much of the movie is made up of shots

[25:11] From behind slightly below of her butt as she is rollerblading around. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, that's that was the part Dan said

[25:18] He thought was shot. Well, yeah

[25:21] It certainly has a point of interest in the movie that has few

[25:25] You're right

[25:26] But it's it hints that it hints that the movie gets like gross at a certain point like it becomes it, you know

[25:32] But it's when she's getting her little bottom whipped. Yeah, which is a whipped by another thong

[25:37] Wearing a female warrior and it's a it's a

[25:42] La just because that's what it's like in the post-apocalyptic future and it's being presented plainly

[25:47] Doesn't mean that the director agrees with what's happening on screen. That's very true. That's right. I shouldn't right

[25:53] I shouldn't confuse the message of the film

[25:57] The message is clearly anti whipping a button

[26:01] Happening doesn't mean the director endorses it. It's just like Wolf of Wall Street, you know, it does not approving of all this

[26:08] Yeah, yeah. Okay. So our

[26:11] Even Spielberg was like, I don't want aliens to get kidnapped by the government. Hey, hey or for each ease but to be whipped

[26:17] That was a deleted scene, but yeah

[26:25] But really helps that yeah

[26:31] I mean you have to get it from below is the other thing and the theater right there

[26:34] I think you have to assume that as humans evolved to a point to make it hard easier to defend against but whipping we will

[26:40] Appear more and more like ET with a kind of with an actual bottom a flat actual bottom. Yeah. Yeah

[26:49] Guys how does ET poop?

[26:51] Dan, uh, well, he's not that regular but as he's gotten older

[26:57] but you know

[26:59] The actual bowel movements are you know, pretty firm and well-shaped

[27:05] Shoots out he has two cloacas one under each arm

[27:12] Expels when he's frightened

[27:15] What an amazing way to ruin that movie as if it was like so heartbreaking and so touching but unfortunately

[27:21] Every time he's surprised, he just shoots shit out of his armpits

[27:27] Steven we got to talk to you. The movie is nearly perfect

[27:30] We think this has the we think this has the potential to be the highest grossing film all time

[27:34] Steven goes yeah, cuz of the poop pits and they're like, that's the one thing we wanted to talk to you about

[27:39] Are you sure cuz I tested really well with me

[27:43] Just because because I am presenting an alien life-form

[27:47] Scientifically correctly doesn't mean I endorse what is happening on

[27:51] Look, I talked to all the xeno biologists and they said if he's gonna have that flat bottom, which you were okay with

[27:56] He's gonna need a place to expel his feces and it's gonna happen when he's scared many life-forms do this

[28:03] You know what you convince the Steven and then when Steven stopped they were like, let's just we'll just cut those parts

[28:08] Let's just do let's just cut those when he's while he's napping and they said he was taking a nap in the edit bay

[28:13] and they tiptoed in

[28:16] And just manually cut that stuff. Yeah

[28:20] so speaking of cutting we have Hawk and

[28:24] The Kabuki clown and Stella speed and they are traveling together

[28:28] Our Holy Trinity's has finally traveled together and they get in a fight with some bondage people

[28:33] That's just what I wrote down. It's like they're like a weird bond like a way. I'll give you if this

[28:39] Gets pretty big. Yeah, don't worry

[28:41] And then we are once again the Fukusai ninja shows up this time with a title card

[28:46] And that is a all-metal rollerblading ninja. That looks kind of like a minotaur

[28:51] They the fetish couple run away

[28:55] Something I want to mention Stella speed she turned out she did okay for herself

[28:59] She's a multiple Emmy winner winner as a producer for the amazing race. So don't worry

[29:03] She didn't escape the world of Zen filmmaking at some point

[29:06] so Hawk knocks out the metal ninja pretty easily and they all escape and

[29:11] After they leave the Fukusai ninja the metal ninja is reanimated by

[29:15] the henchmen of Pharaoh who is a villain we ever really talked about Pharaoh is a

[29:21] Is a like an older man who is pushed around in a wheelchair?

[29:26] He has to be in a wheelchair because he had some kind of a skateboarding accident and he has to wear a mask

[29:33] Which he takes off other time

[29:36] When he's outside he has to wear it whenever he's outside coming. It's too sunny

[29:40] Leather

[29:43] His mishap with a skateboard has left him vulnerable to the harsh rays of the Sun in a way that I can only imagine I

[29:49] Don't it's it's this is and this is this character where he has these long monologues about I just wanted people to enjoy the skateboard

[29:56] I never knew what would happen as if the downfall society is because

[30:00] of the invention of the skateboard.

[30:01] Yeah, it's pretty great.

[30:01] And I would like to take a moment to-

[30:03] And also to point out,

[30:04] Marty McFly invented the skateboard

[30:06] when he went back in time.

[30:07] We all know that.

[30:08] That's true, it's in the books.

[30:09] Just like he invented rock and roll.

[30:10] I just wanted to reassure the audience

[30:13] that this is a movie that exists

[30:16] and not sort of a late April Fool's prank we're playing

[30:20] or a collective hallucination we had.

[30:23] Yeah, it's all on YouTube, it's proof.

[30:25] It's all there, don't watch it.

[30:26] It's a waste of your time, but it's there.

[30:28] Okay, so they are now,

[30:31] our heroes are also joined

[30:33] by this rollerblading banjo player

[30:35] who wears a mask and a top hat and goggles.

[30:37] And he's-

[30:38] This was the most amazing part of the movie to me,

[30:39] where I was like, this movie invented the doof warrior

[30:43] before George Miller invented the Fury Road.

[30:45] Because he's on wheels, he's got a mask on,

[30:48] he's playing a stringed instrument.

[30:49] I was like, this movie is ahead of its time.

[30:51] You know what, it's actually great.

[30:52] Hell yeah, I had the same thought.

[30:53] Yeah, if it inspired the greatest character

[30:56] in the history of cinema, then, you know.

[30:59] I mean, for me, I was like,

[31:00] I hate this guy and I hate his banjo.

[31:02] It reminds you of what derailed

[31:05] Steve Martin from being funny.

[31:09] And luckily, he's not around for long

[31:11] because a different ninja shows up.

[31:12] No, Steve Martin's still here.

[31:13] He's the only murderers in the building.

[31:14] It's a huge show.

[31:15] I mean, he's, you know, got a late career.

[31:17] Meryl Streep is on the season.

[31:19] He's funny in the Martin Short Show,

[31:22] the not only murderers in the building,

[31:24] which could also be called the Martin Short.

[31:26] No, the little touring thing that they did together.

[31:28] Oh yeah, the touring test they took

[31:30] to see if they were computers or not.

[31:32] Turns out Martin Short is, Steve Martin isn't.

[31:35] Yeah. Interesting.

[31:37] Okay, so a different ninja surprised them.

[31:39] He kills the banjo player and injures the clown.

[31:43] And then Stella Speed tries to run for it, but is chased.

[31:49] Hawk has a samurai duel with one of the ninjas

[31:51] that's really boring and slow.

[31:55] And then he gets in a fight with Sister Sparrow's captors

[32:01] and leaves, like ends up killing them.

[32:04] And it seems like she dies.

[32:06] Is this a vision?

[32:06] Is it a dream?

[32:07] I can't really tell.

[32:09] And then Hawk teaches Stella Speed how to use a sword,

[32:14] which is at odds with her being a pacifist.

[32:17] So we have a long sequence of them doing kata

[32:20] with their samurai swords.

[32:22] Then we get a, then they like start running around.

[32:26] We get a title card that says, back on the road.

[32:29] They ride around and battle some more ninjas.

[32:31] This all takes a long time.

[32:33] This is very long.

[32:34] And in between this stuff, there's like,

[32:37] Pharaoh is being pushed around and will do like monologues

[32:40] that I couldn't really hear because the sound was bad.

[32:43] Yeah, it's hard to make out some of what he's saying.

[32:45] It's all more stuff about the world he created

[32:47] for the most part.

[32:48] And him asking things of his sidekick, whose name is Stealth.

[32:51] And he'll always be like, Stealth.

[32:53] That's actually a cool character.

[32:54] Stealth, take me for a push.

[32:55] Stealth, is it sunny outside?

[32:57] But it's a funny thing to call somebody.

[32:58] Yeah, he looks like a variant storm shadow action figure.

[33:03] Yeah.

[33:04] Which is cool, because that's like an evil version

[33:07] of Snake Eyes, who is also cool.

[33:09] But this movie, for this whole chunk, vast,

[33:12] vast swathes of it, for someone who was raised in England,

[33:16] might say, if they're on a podcast in America now,

[33:18] that are, it's just them either riding around

[33:21] on rollerblades through the same stretches of desert,

[33:23] or them having these slow motion,

[33:24] kind of not really choreographed fights.

[33:27] And, oh, wow, it is, it really feels trying.

[33:31] It's really difficult to get through.

[33:33] At a certain point, I'm sure we'll get to it,

[33:35] or maybe we're into it right now.

[33:36] I can't really place anything that happens.

[33:40] Yes.

[33:40] Like, characters just start dying one by one.

[33:45] Like a lot of characters just, and the movie needs it.

[33:47] Or appearing in new locations,

[33:49] and it's like, I don't know how they got there.

[33:50] It needs to cull its list of characters

[33:54] that I don't know who they are or what they're doing.

[33:57] Problem is, they're all important.

[33:58] Yeah.

[34:00] So they ride around, they confront Pharaoh in his wheelchair,

[34:04] but then his goon Stealth shows up carrying an Uzi,

[34:07] which, I mean, that's better than a samurai sword.

[34:10] Yeah.

[34:11] Kabuki runs off.

[34:12] But it has less honor.

[34:13] That's true, it does.

[34:14] Yeah.

[34:15] Kabuki runs off and is chased by a new warrior

[34:19] who carries two axes, and they get in a fight,

[34:23] and the axe warrior wins, leaving Kabuki dead.

[34:25] Oh no.

[34:26] Then a shaman-type character shows up

[34:30] and tries to revive Kabuki,

[34:33] but then is whisked away through, I'm guessing, magic

[34:36] to have a conversation with the Black Knight,

[34:38] who's telling her that, you know,

[34:39] I don't know something about darkness,

[34:41] and she's talking about lightness.

[34:43] And then Stella's speed is captured,

[34:49] by Pharaoh's goons, and her bottom gets whipped

[34:53] at this point by another thong-clad evil character.

[34:57] This was, for me, this was very much the nadir of the film.

[34:59] This was the one part where it went from,

[35:01] I'm not enjoying this because it's boring,

[35:03] to I'm not enjoying this really because I'm just,

[35:06] this is unpleasant to me.

[35:07] Yeah.

[35:08] Hawk is also captured, and he is put on trial by Pharaoh

[35:12] in front of Pharaoh's United Skates of America,

[35:17] which I kind of like that.

[35:18] I'm like, it took us a while, but we got there.

[35:21] It's such a shaggy dog story of a movie

[35:23] to get to that one play on words.

[35:25] And I'm like, you should have started with this.

[35:27] Like, if this was more in the spirit of a future

[35:30] where it was called the United Skates of America

[35:32] and everything was Rollerblade-based,

[35:33] I'd be like, you know what, movie?

[35:34] Yes, make that movie, yeah.

[35:36] Okay, so there's a lot of flashing lights.

[35:38] Hawk and Stella are put in a-

[35:40] Yeah, that's the movie.

[35:41] Yeah, Hawk and Stella are put in a cage together,

[35:45] and then we see a lot of shots of, like,

[35:48] threatening-looking villains and more flashing lights,

[35:52] and Father Donaldo and the Black Knight

[35:56] have some kind of a interaction.

[35:59] Everybody's trying to, like, threaten them.

[36:02] And then, all of a sudden, we cut to a wedding

[36:06] where Father Donaldo is giving a wild sermon

[36:10] about how time is different

[36:13] and, like, you shouldn't let time control you.

[36:16] Everyone admits time exists,

[36:17] but it's not a real thing and it's not physical.

[36:19] Wait, did you, I may have gone into a Zen trance

[36:22] while doing the summary.

[36:24] Did you talk about the part where,

[36:25] is it Stella Speed or is it Sister Sparrow

[36:29] who's sitting in a chair as snakes are being dropped on her?

[36:32] It's Sister Sparrow, yeah.

[36:33] Like, because we saw a vision of it earlier,

[36:35] but now we see it happening, I guess, for real.

[36:38] But it's, again, it feels like the movie at some point,

[36:42] it's like the movie was like,

[36:43] I'm loving this stuff with the rollerblading,

[36:46] and then Chekhtit's watching was like,

[36:47] oh, shit, we gotta wrap this up.

[36:48] Like, hurry, get through the plot, get through these things.

[36:50] And so just throwing events at you, you know?

[36:52] So he's, the priest is marrying Hawk and Alice,

[36:57] I think is her name.

[36:59] You could have told me that any of the characters

[37:01] are named anything and I would believe you.

[37:04] And then they get onto a motorcycle.

[37:11] Many times.

[37:11] Many times, like 100 times.

[37:14] And this is also-

[37:15] And when I say many times,

[37:16] it's literally like many takes of them

[37:18] getting on a motorcycle, one after the other.

[37:20] Different angles, it's the same, yeah.

[37:23] So they kind of like ride off into the sunset

[37:26] on his motorcycle, but then Stella Speed

[37:29] is in a car being driven by St. Offender,

[37:34] played by Joe Esteves.

[37:36] And-

[37:37] We see that car pull out multiple times.

[37:39] We see the car pull out multiple times,

[37:41] and they pull up next to them on the highway.

[37:45] Stella pulls out a Uzi or a pistol or something.

[37:49] And then we see Hawk and his bride have crashed

[37:55] and they're in the dirt.

[37:55] We don't actually see anyone get shot.

[37:57] No.

[37:58] And then-

[38:02] But the bride is apparently dead based on-

[38:04] Seems to be dead.

[38:05] Hawk's reaction upon regaining consciousness.

[38:10] What's your best guess as to why Stella Speed did this?

[38:15] She was, her brain was corrupted by a skateboard.

[38:21] She was like, if I can't have you, Hawk, no one can.

[38:25] Cause this is, I wasn't sure which of-

[38:28] I wasn't sure which of those,

[38:29] I was like, is she jealous

[38:30] or is that she's been turned to the dark side

[38:32] by these villains?

[38:34] But it was all very like, anyway,

[38:38] it was at the point where I was starting to question

[38:41] if I had understood which characters were which,

[38:43] because it's Hawk, it's a bunch of dudes,

[38:46] and it's mostly just blonde women who look pretty similar

[38:50] playing most of the other parts.

[38:51] And so I was like, wait, is this a character

[38:53] that I thought was a different character?

[38:55] It's very hard to tell them apart.

[38:57] Well, cause the bride character, I think,

[38:58] is a new, completely new character.

[39:00] That confused me.

[39:01] I thought at first that he was marrying Stella Speed

[39:03] or possibly his sister.

[39:05] Yes, that's what I was assuming.

[39:06] And so Hawk stands up, he like, does like a little,

[39:10] I think he does like a little kata thing

[39:12] with his samurai sword, and then he wanders off

[39:15] and then his bride, her body disappears.

[39:18] And then I think his motorcycle disappears.

[39:20] And then that's the movie, that's the end of the movie.

[39:24] Guys, who were the Rollerblade Seven?

[39:27] That's a very complicated question

[39:29] that I don't know if we can answer.

[39:30] I'm guessing Hawk is one of them.

[39:32] Okay.

[39:33] So we have Hawk, Stella Speed.

[39:35] We have Kabuki, so that's three.

[39:38] Yeah.

[39:40] There's-

[39:40] I mean, maybe some of the bad guys

[39:42] are part of the Rollerblade Seven.

[39:44] Yeah, maybe the Fukuzai Ninja.

[39:47] And Grumpy.

[39:50] Grumpy.

[39:51] Yeah, Dopey, yeah, Sleepy, Sneezy.

[39:53] Sloth, Brad Pitt.

[39:56] Brad Pitt.

[39:57] Brad Pitt's in seven, dude.

[39:59] Yeah, yeah, of course.

[40:00] Oh, that's the flop you're talking about. I thought you were doing Goonies.

[40:04] He thought you meant the animal.

[40:08] So, on the poster for the Rollerblade 7,

[40:12] it shows Hawk, and then on either side of him are three

[40:16] women with rollerblades, and I only recognize Stella Speed and

[40:20] the Kabuki clown lady, and

[40:24] maybe in the first movie there's seven good guy warriors?

[40:28] So this is the Rollerblade 4, in this case,

[40:32] is what you're saying. I mean, if anything, it's the Rollerblade 3,

[40:36] because Sister Sparrow is not really on rollerblades, right?

[40:40] Yeah, and they specifically only mention a

[40:44] trio of heroes, but it's okay, it's fine. I mean, they're trying to

[40:48] cash in on the very valuable Rollerblade 7 franchise name.

[40:52] Well, they're trying to cash in on Return of the Secaucus 7, of course.

[40:56] John Sayles picture.

[41:00] In his original script, they were all on rollerblades.

[41:04] John, we can't afford these rollerblades.

[41:08] He was inspired by how, when they made the Magnificent 7,

[41:12] they were like, you know what, Kurosawa couldn't afford

[41:16] rollerblades for his samurai, so in the western

[41:20] version, we're going to do rollerblades. We have a Hollywood budget, we can do the rollerblades.

[41:24] They had the rollerblades, and then it just didn't go over well with Tess's audience, so they had to

[41:28] digitally remove the rollerblades and all the scenes and add horses under them.

[41:32] And then there was the Return of the Magnificent 7, in which they had to digitally remove that poop

[41:36] shot out of the armpits of each of the cowboys when they got surprised.

[41:40] It's the only thing that made sense.

[41:44] I'm glad that you explained the way it called backwards.

[41:48] Just in case this section is cut out, say, as a clip, I want to make sure people know that that is not a random reference.

[41:52] But that was the earliest digital

[41:56] technology, was removing those rollerblades and then inserting horses in the Magnificent 7.

[42:00] So, that was the whole movie.

[42:04] I thought I did an okay job.

[42:08] I kept it tight because, you know what, honestly, so much of this movie is just reused footage

[42:12] and there's almost no dialogue and lots of

[42:16] music that you'd

[42:20] probably hear in a coffee shop that was near Scott Shaw's house.

[42:24] That last sequence, after they get married, there's a long rock song about whatever

[42:28] happened to America.

[42:32] It's the pride of the Yankees!

[42:36] I wonder if we saw different YouTube videos with different soundtracks.

[42:40] Man, that's awesome. That's how Spider-Verse is different.

[42:44] It's a long song that feels like it's being performed by a band that would play

[42:48] at a local bar, but it's all about whatever happened to America.

[42:52] A guy went to war, he came home and raised a family, and now what happened

[42:56] to that promise? It's a very... Like Born in the USA.

[43:00] Yeah, kind of. It was like a not-rip-off of Born in the USA.

[43:04] It's like Born in the USA if it's not actually taking a harsh look at

[43:08] patriotism. It felt like it was the opposite.

[43:12] It feels like maybe it's the conservative response to Born in the USA.

[43:16] It's like, why don't we love this country anymore?

[43:20] It's like the song version of the Easy Rider sequel.

[43:24] I'm curious you guys didn't hear that song because that played over the entire ending of the movie.

[43:28] I probably heard it, I just wasn't paying attention.

[43:32] You were so busy trying to figure out the movie for the notes.

[43:36] Free of having to take notes on the summary of this movie, I felt very free to

[43:40] experience it my own way.

[43:44] It's like a board that had all the different characters and plot threads drawn out

[43:48] like I was watching Primer and trying to understand it.

[43:52] Here's my question. The same director, without Scott Shaw,

[43:56] he also made a movie called Rollerblade Warriors Taken by Force from 1989.

[44:00] Here's the description IMDb.

[44:04] In the future, a warrior nun on roller skates must rescue a seer who is to be

[44:08] sacrificed by a band of mutants. It makes me wonder, is that the

[44:12] coherent version of this movie?

[44:16] That sounds like this movie, but were they able to do it in a way where the story made

[44:20] any sense at all? It wasn't zen filmmaking. I thought you were going to be like, is that this guy's

[44:24] fetish? People on rollerblades? That's very possible.

[44:28] He heard the song Sex on Wheels and he was like, yeah.

[44:32] He saw Boogie Nights and he's like, oh, I could have just put

[44:36] this in a normal movie.

[44:40] Let's do our final judgments whether this is a good, bad movie, a bad, bad movie,

[44:44] a movie we kind of like.

[44:48] Like I said, I have... I always love Dan's

[44:52] troubled sigh after he announces what the ratings are.

[44:56] Like I said, early in the movie, I had a certain amount of

[45:00] you know, I had hopes

[45:04] that it would have... Rhonda's sheer sized hopes.

[45:08] But also the way that it was kind of making

[45:12] good use of its no budget in a way that

[45:16] I appreciate with these kind of post-apocalyptic

[45:20] weird movies, low budget films that you see.

[45:24] That hope was dashed as it went along and

[45:28] nothing made any sense at all. I'd say it's a bad, bad movie

[45:32] with the caveat that if this was a video installation

[45:36] that ran on loop and it was just like a

[45:40] fantasia on the idea of low budget post-apocalyptic

[45:44] movies, I would enjoy stopping by

[45:48] watching a little bit of it and moving on to the next exhibit.

[45:52] This is the kind of movie that they would play

[45:56] like I could see them playing this at the bar Freddy's in Brooklyn

[46:00] where one of the owners would like cut together these weird little

[46:04] video reels. This feels like that.

[46:08] This sort of thing where you're like, it doesn't make sense but it looks weird

[46:12] and I'm drinking. I would say

[46:16] I can't say it's necessarily a good, bad movie because I don't think

[46:20] it's fun to watch and it wouldn't necessarily be fun to watch with other

[46:24] people. You could put it on

[46:28] in the background at a party, but not something you would want to

[46:32] watch to get any pleasure out of.

[46:36] I guess I'll say bad, bad. I think I'm also going to say bad, bad and I had not

[46:40] thought of the idea of using it as kind of

[46:44] like atmospheric wallpaper

[46:48] at an event, but I think that's the best way to use it. Dan, I appreciate that

[46:52] you thought of a silver lining way to use what is objectively

[46:56] a piece of garbage. Objectively something that is barely

[47:00] a movie. I feel like if anything

[47:04] maybe disproves the philosophy or concept of zen filmmaking, it is this

[47:08] product of that. Although maybe the original

[47:12] Rollerblade 7 is really good. Maybe it really holds together. Maybe it's really fun. Maybe it's

[47:16] exciting. Maybe it has a kind of trippy, weird vibe that really

[47:20] takes you to an interesting place. Probably not. Judging by this, probably not.

[47:24] You know what? Let us move on now.

[47:28] Please. Out of the wasteland.

[47:32] Stuart, you did a great job. I want to give you a medal.

[47:36] Everybody write your local congressman and tell him that Stuart did a great job.

[47:40] He did a great job summarizing the legend of the Rollerblade 7 and they should drop all other business

[47:44] until then. You know what might help you

[47:48] enjoy something like Legend of the Rollerblade 7 if

[47:52] a judge sentences you to watch it

[47:56] for littering or something? I don't know.

[48:00] It's microdosing. Our show today is sponsored by Microdose Gummies.

[48:04] Microdose Gummies deliver perfect entry-level doses of THC that help you feel

[48:08] just the right amount of good.

[48:12] If you're interested in maybe having some THC but you don't want to be zonked out,

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[48:20] I've had good experiences with these Lumilab gummies.

[48:24] They don't taste bad like

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[48:44] To learn more about microdosing THC, go to Microdose.com and use code FLOP

[48:48] to get free shipping and 30% off your first order.

[48:52] Links can be found in the show description.

[48:56] Again, that is Microdose.com. Code FLOP.

[49:00] We're also today sponsored by Squarespace.

[49:04] These days, everybody is online. You should be online.

[49:08] You should have a place for people to go visit you online.

[49:12] Squarespace is where you can do that.

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[49:28] at coding, Squarespace is going to help you out.

[49:32] Squarespace allows you to gain some insights into who's visiting your website and how they're

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[50:13] You know, I love the drag and drops

[50:16] for desktop or for mobile.

[50:17] That's important because everybody's

[50:18] on their phone these days.

[50:20] So why don't you go to squarespace.com

[50:23] slash flop for a free trial.

[50:25] And when you're ready to launch,

[50:27] use offer code flop to save 10%

[50:30] off your first purchase of a website or a domain.

[50:33] And we also have a Jumbotron to read today.

[50:38] And this message is for Mickey and it's from Rob.

[50:41] And it says, happy birthday, Mickey.

[50:42] Congratulations on your upcoming gender-affirming surgery.

[50:46] I and the entire family love and support you

[50:48] in everything you do.

[50:49] Thank you for the amazing conversations

[50:51] about all things movies,

[50:52] as well as your moving role play in everything IDM.

[50:56] It is a joy being your brother

[50:57] and sharing passions like the Flophouse.

[50:59] Thank you.

[51:00] Oh, what a sweet message.

[51:01] That's very sweet.

[51:02] That's very nice.

[51:03] Now to a slightly less sweet message

[51:05] because it's all about our own mercantile economic stuff.

[51:10] Sweet to me.

[51:11] Sweet to us.

[51:12] Hey, we do this monthly thing.

[51:15] It's called Flop TV.

[51:16] It's usually, oh, hey, Dan.

[51:17] It's, we do this monthly thing.

[51:19] It's usually the first Saturday of each month.

[51:21] In fact, I think each of the upcoming episodes

[51:23] is the first Saturday of each month.

[51:24] Yeah, we don't have to,

[51:24] we don't have to disclaim anything.

[51:26] We can't pass the one that is not.

[51:27] We pass the one that it wasn't.

[51:28] And where we do a roughly one hour TV version

[51:32] of the Flophouse podcast,

[51:33] where we're talking about movies

[51:34] that we have never covered on the podcast before.

[51:37] We have two great episodes so far,

[51:38] Beastmaster 2 and Cool World.

[51:40] All great movies.

[51:41] We've got another one coming up on October 7th.

[51:44] That's right, October 7th at 9 p.m. Eastern,

[51:46] 6 p.m. Pacific.

[51:47] It's an all-American meat double feature, I'm calling it.

[51:51] Hot dog the movie and hamburger the motion picture.

[51:53] Two movies that I'm really,

[51:55] I'm gonna find out they're not just about

[51:56] making those things, and I'm gonna be real disappointed.

[51:58] But we'll see.

[51:59] Well, I know for a fact that one of them is not.

[52:01] Yeah, one of them I think is a skiing movie, right?

[52:03] Yeah. Which is,

[52:04] I'll give you some. The other is one.

[52:05] The other is legit about the food item.

[52:07] Let's see which.

[52:09] Let's find out which one it is.

[52:10] So if you wanna see those shows,

[52:12] they're really fun, they're super great.

[52:14] It's like watching a TV show.

[52:16] It usually fits into like a normal

[52:17] programming schedule time slot,

[52:19] in case you have other things

[52:20] you wanna do around those times.

[52:20] If you wanna see the inside of our homes.

[52:24] Well, I mean.

[52:26] Except for mine.

[52:27] Two of ours.

[52:28] Elliot puts up a virtual background.

[52:30] He remains a man of mystery.

[52:31] I don't really have a good home background.

[52:33] But you wanna see it?

[52:35] Go to theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[52:37] Again, that's theflophouse.simpletics.com,

[52:40] where you can buy tickets,

[52:41] you can buy individual tickets,

[52:42] you can buy a season pass,

[52:43] and you're like, hey, it's a six episode season.

[52:46] Two episodes have gone by,

[52:47] why should I get the season pass?

[52:48] Uh-uh, because the recordings of those episodes

[52:51] will stay up through the length of the series.

[52:54] So if you missed one of our episodes,

[52:55] that's totally great.

[52:56] You can still watch them.

[52:57] If you can't watch the show live,

[52:59] that's totally great.

[53:00] You can watch the recording later.

[53:01] So that's thefloptv at theflophouse.simpletics.com.

[53:06] You get your tickets and you get instructions

[53:07] on how to watch the show.

[53:08] But hey guys, there's another show we're doing.

[53:10] What?

[53:11] It's not just on your computer.

[53:12] In fact, it's not on your computer at all.

[53:14] It's in a real room, in real life, with real people.

[53:17] And things are gonna start.

[53:18] Me space.

[53:19] Yeah, ironically,

[53:20] because it's not about Hot Dog the movie

[53:21] or Hamburger the motion picture.

[53:22] This is the actual Me Space on October 19th.

[53:25] That's a Thursday night here in Los Angeles

[53:27] at Vidiot's, the Vidiot's Movie Theater.

[53:30] We're gonna be doing two original shows.

[53:32] That's right, two all new shows at 6 p.m.

[53:34] We're gonna be talking about Speed 2, Cruise Control.

[53:37] And at 8.45 p.m. we're gonna be talking about

[53:39] Three Men and a Baby.

[53:41] And Three Men and a Baby is gonna feature

[53:43] a certain special someone who's gonna join us

[53:46] as a special guest.

[53:47] Is it Willem Dafoe covered in leeches?

[53:51] You ruined the surprise yet again, Steve.

[53:53] I don't even know what that's referencing.

[53:55] It just seems like an odd thing to say.

[53:57] A favorite Flophouse guest is gonna be joining us again.

[54:00] A guest, but you could also say

[54:02] a Flophouse star of the show, wink, wink, wink.

[54:05] I am so excited to do these shows

[54:08] because I'm not writing for TV right now.

[54:12] I got no excuse to go out to L.A.

[54:14] I'm gonna get to go to L.A.

[54:15] I'm gonna see my friend Elliot Kalin.

[54:18] I'm gonna see my friend, unnamed special guest.

[54:21] And it's gonna be great.

[54:23] So that's all, and Stuart's gonna be there too.

[54:25] October 19th, dance these three things.

[54:28] October 19th, tickets are available

[54:30] at vidiotsfoundation.org.

[54:32] Again, that's vidiotsfoundation.org.

[54:35] Two different shows.

[54:36] We're gonna be doing presentations.

[54:37] We're gonna talk about the movie.

[54:38] We'll take questions from the audience.

[54:39] It's an old-fashioned, classic,

[54:40] traditional Flophouse live show.

[54:42] And it's a double feature.

[54:44] Two in one.

[54:45] You need separate tickets for each one, though.

[54:47] So it's gonna be really fun.

[54:48] I'm looking forward to it too.

[54:49] Vidiots is a great space.

[54:50] It's got a great video store attached to it.

[54:53] And I'm so excited to be doing something

[54:55] through them and with them.

[54:56] And that's the extent of our promotions for this episode.

[55:00] If you need a laugh and you're on the go,

[55:06] try S-T-O-P-P-O-D-C-A-S-T-I-R.

[55:09] Were you trying to put the name of the podcast there?

[55:12] Yeah, I'm trying to spell it, but it's tricky.

[55:14] Let me give it a try.

[55:15] Okay.

[55:19] call S-T-O-P-P-P-A-D-I.

[55:22] It'll never fit.

[55:22] No, it will.

[55:23] Let me try.

[55:28] try S-T-O-P-P-P-D-C-O-O.

[55:31] Ah, we are so close.

[55:33] Stop podcasting yourself.

[55:35] A podcast from MaximumFun.org.

[55:38] If you need a laugh and you're on the go.

[55:41] I'm Miffy Wadiwe, the host of Maximum Film.

[55:44] I'm Alonzo Duralde, also the host of Maximum Film.

[55:47] And I'm Drea Clark, yet another host of Maximum Film.

[55:51] Every week we hosts huddle up.

[55:53] Usually with an illustrious guest.

[55:55] And we talk about films.

[55:57] We have film news.

[55:58] We have film quizzes.

[55:59] We answer your film questions.

[56:03] It's like the maximum amount of film talk.

[56:06] That's why we call it Maximum Film.

[56:10] Boom.

[56:11] Maximum Film, the movie podcast

[56:12] that's not just a bunch of straight white guys.

[56:14] New episodes weekly on MaximumFun.org.

[56:18] Dan, what do we do next?

[56:19] We just roller blade off into the wasteland?

[56:21] Well, not quite yet.

[56:23] What we're gonna do is we're gonna answer

[56:25] some letters from listeners like you.

[56:28] Like you, especially if you wrote these letters.

[56:30] The first one, pardon me, I'm burping up a storm.

[56:34] The first one is from Hank.

[56:35] What if Dan can't pitch movies during the strike,

[56:38] but afterwards, burp storm is a pretty good concept to pitch.

[56:42] Ah, there's a storm of burps hitting the city.

[56:45] At the same time that a prisoner is being transferred.

[56:47] A decade or two back, sci-fi would have snapped that up, right?

[56:51] Oh, for sure, yeah.

[56:52] There goes my knee again.

[56:54] It must be a burp storm coming.

[56:56] A general yelling at a scientist,

[56:57] how far away is the burp storm?

[57:00] Did that storm eat some barbecue?

[57:03] The only way to defeat it is with a countervailing burp storm

[57:06] operating at opposite speeds in the opposite direction.

[57:10] Throw some Alka-Seltzer into that storm.

[57:14] Get me eating competition champion Joey Chestnut.

[57:20] He's the only man who knows how to counter this level of burp.

[57:22] He's the only man who can ingest enough beans to counteract the storm.

[57:27] This first letter is from Hansel from Chicago, who writes,

[57:33] while listening to your episode on the Santa Claus 3,

[57:37] I realized that mental health care treatment in Christmas movies

[57:40] is often maligned for reasons.

[57:43] Not just Christmas movies, but anyway.

[57:45] Lots of reasons, yeah.

[57:46] In the Santa Claus trilogy,

[57:48] Judge Reinhold's therapist character is the original movie's primary antagonist.

[57:55] In 2019-

[57:56] Wait, do you guys know Santa Claus is a Christmas movie?

[57:58] A lot of people don't know that.

[57:59] Oh.

[58:00] Like Die Hard.

[58:01] Yeah, like Die Hard, Santa Claus.

[58:02] Is that at least in the trivia section of IMDb?

[58:04] Yeah, it is.

[58:06] In 2019's Noelle, Anna Kendrick, spoilers, is arrested in Phoenix,

[58:11] then detained in a mental health ward for saying she's from the North Pole.

[58:15] I mean, that sounds kind of reasonable, but anyway.

[58:17] In Elf, Buddy is called certifiably insane by James Caan.

[58:21] It is a repeated trope of the genre, which adds little value to the story.

[58:25] This reminded me of comments Elliott has made about how many movies

[58:31] portray conspiracy theories as real and valid, which is at best lazy and

[58:36] at worst a troubling validation of conspiracy thinking in real life.

[58:41] Beyond real conspiracy theories and inaccurate mental health portrayals,

[58:45] are there any other alarming movie portrayals you want to complain about?

[58:49] What really grinds your gears?

[58:51] Keep on flopping, Hansel from Chicago.

[58:54] We talked about USA Up all night earlier.

[58:57] The thing that sprung to my mind is-

[58:58] I will not have a word said against it, Daniel.

[59:01] A lot of the sex comedies I enjoyed as a youth,

[59:05] not that close examination, are filled with bad messages.

[59:12] Upon a cursory glance.

[59:14] Including that coercive sex is okay.

[59:19] Peeping is okay, just general harassment.

[59:24] Peeping, this was not what I was going to bring up, but

[59:26] you're right that peeping for many years in movies was considered like,

[59:31] what a lovably scampish thing to do.

[59:33] If anything, this is a hero for

[59:36] spying on these women while they're changing clothes or whatever.

[59:38] And that's horrifying.

[59:39] That's terrible.

[59:41] And even on a lesser level,

[59:45] romantic comedies just had a bunch of bad messages about not taking no for an answer.

[59:51] Well, that's what I actually wanted to talk about.

[59:53] I feel like one of the most dangerous messages that, I guess,

[59:57] the movies we grew up with presented, and it's not just the movies.

[1:00:00] with but it was I feel like it was especially prevalent because there were so many kind of

[1:00:03] romantic comedies of this type when we were growing up is the idea that not just as part

[1:00:10] but the idea of a kind of fairly depressing guy who has a crush on someone and the movie insists

[1:00:20] that the only just thing in the universe is for that crush to blossom into love between with the

[1:00:26] other person returning their feelings but also that idea that if you don't take no you can wear

[1:00:31] someone down into romance or if you do something big enough or crazy enough or persistent enough

[1:00:37] that eventually they will give in in a way that is a legitimate form of romance I think that's

[1:00:42] genuinely a genuinely emotionally damaging message both to women who would become I assume the

[1:00:47] targets of this and also to men who don't learn how to mature into emotionally adult human beings

[1:00:54] who understand what traditionally their fathers don't teach them to be emotionally

[1:01:01] emotionally mature human beings that's no not at all not at all in some cases it's the other way

[1:01:06] around often yeah so yeah that was when I want to bring up I feel like oh wow it's raining outside

[1:01:12] um not over here in sunny LA must be god you enjoyed that report of what the weather was like

[1:01:20] Brooklyn uh about two weeks before you're here

[1:01:26] it's less of a weather forecast and more of a weather flashback yeah yeah

[1:01:32] here we are in this two weeks ago weather flashback weekend and what do we play we're

[1:01:38] playing some rain is coming down I'm I'm Sam flashback the only weather forecaster who's

[1:01:44] always right because I say it after the fact I'll tell you down to the minute when the rain

[1:01:50] started and stopped so you can plan your past um yeah I think I mean I think you guys kind of

[1:01:55] touched on the first thing that popped into my head but obviously there's a variety of other

[1:02:00] things like uh I don't know portraying police as heroes sure uh or like uh jokes about uh

[1:02:09] like obese people like stuff like that gross stuff like that yeah I just rewatched I just

[1:02:14] rewatched there's also there's also a huge you know and also racism and in all yeah of course

[1:02:18] certainly the elevation of the idea of like the cop who doesn't play by the rules yeah just like

[1:02:23] no thank you I would like a cop that plays by all the rules maybe give him more rules I mean when

[1:02:28] it went up when a police officer is on the side of of the actual of the actual just thing that

[1:02:36] would happen in a unit in in the world the universe like that can be a heroic story but

[1:02:40] yeah the the valorization of cops who are that what makes them heroic is that they refuse to

[1:02:46] follow even the most basic laws and rely on violent force to get things done like that's a bad

[1:02:52] message yeah and the at the uh and that eventually leads you to things like cops being like yeah

[1:02:58] that's why I have a punisher skull on my on my on my stuff and it's like well you know that he's a

[1:03:03] he's a murderer you know this maniac cop is the bad guy in the movie at the uh but yeah that's a

[1:03:10] I feel like this is something I see a little bit less of but I feel like the there was a period

[1:03:15] when for a lot of times in movies you'd see this kind of implicit idea that there's something

[1:03:20] romantic about being kind of depressed and that to be creative requires a certain amount of

[1:03:24] depression and emotional alienation and social isolation which is also not a healthy message

[1:03:30] you know no yeah um so this next letter this is from uh michael last name without or perhaps

[1:03:41] michelle depending on what uh imperially from michelle imperially yep the french version

[1:03:48] dear flop house something that has been bugging me lately about movies and tv is the apparent

[1:03:54] lack of dialect diversity as in there don't seem to be any regional or even foreign accent these

[1:04:00] days there's a single standard american accent in quotes that everyone seems to share and then at

[1:04:06] most you might get some people who speak with an extra californian voice but not much more than

[1:04:10] that every now and then someone's southern every now and then yes have you noticed this at all am

[1:04:16] i just not watching enough does it even really matter it might make me sad that no one on tv

[1:04:20] sounds like my grandparents from upstate new york and oklahoma but it's not like they're ethnic

[1:04:24] minorities while modern hollywood does more work at representing people than ever before even if they

[1:04:30] mostly just all sound the same it just bugs me personally that this is a whole dimension

[1:04:35] to the human experience that isn't seeming to be used this also seems to be in contrast with

[1:04:39] media from england where there's a lot more regional or socio-economic accents as well as

[1:04:45] things from japan that often have trouble translating their own dialect diversity into

[1:04:49] american media so translators sometimes use english accents to bulk out their tool set

[1:04:54] or even older american media which seems to freely use a lot more accents than the current stuff so

[1:05:00] there's not really a direct question there but it was an interesting topic i wanted to bring it up

[1:05:06] is this something you've noticed yourself older media featured a lot of like old-timey new york

[1:05:10] accents right like hey see well i feel like there is a there is a kind of new york boston

[1:05:16] mishmash accent that gets used a lot by guys who are supposed to be like in crime movies or if

[1:05:22] they're say tom hardy playing venom or just i mean that's a case where i hear those accents

[1:05:28] in movies and tv more often than i do in my actual life in new york most of the time

[1:05:34] i think there's i think what what uh what the letter writer is talking about is probably a real

[1:05:39] i think there's a there's an an effort being made for racial diversity in casting but there's not

[1:05:45] really an effort being made in diverse types of viewpoint or and especially not socioeconomic

[1:05:51] diversity in film at a certain point almost every movie seemed to be about a rich person unless it

[1:05:57] was you know fucking uh hillbilly junction what was the movie hillbilly elegy unless it's

[1:06:02] hillbilly junction unless it's unless it's about welcome to hillbilly junction

[1:06:09] it's not what you think it was named after thaddeus hillbill it was named after duke

[1:06:14] thaddeus hillbilly who founded this who sponsored the exploration that led to this colony but the

[1:06:22] so i think there's a at a certain point hollywood uh or rather mainstream american film and

[1:06:27] television stopped making as much stuff about people who are not rich because i think there's

[1:06:33] a fantasy of affluence and it's just easier and this and it's it just is prettier to look at on

[1:06:40] screen and i mean also i think a lot of the people who are the money people behind movies

[1:06:45] green lighting movies yes you know are rich so they're not necessarily the creative people

[1:06:49] involved but yes the money people want something that that they can understand and relate to

[1:06:53] and i think that does involve a flattening of accents a flattening of uh types of yeah they're

[1:06:58] like well why is this character not driving a tesla i would also he seems like a reasonable

[1:07:04] person why would he be driving a tesla and there is a fair and in america for other i'm the i'm the

[1:07:09] the thousand millionth person to say this there is a blindness to the existence of class in many

[1:07:14] ways and it's something that we used to pride ourselves on that we don't have fixed classes

[1:07:18] and that turned into this idea that america has no classes we don't need to talk about it whereas

[1:07:21] in england they're super they're still super in a class system and like you can still use they still

[1:07:27] kind of take this perverse pride and being able to judge and pigeonhole somebody by what neighborhood

[1:07:32] they came from based on how they pronounce different words and things like that so i think

[1:07:35] when they're comparing it to british stuff it's just still such a fact of british culture you know

[1:07:40] also like my god england has so many different accents in such a small space for such a small

[1:07:47] space yeah uh i also one thing i would like to posit is that a lot of it has to do with

[1:07:53] you know obviously most movies are shot in hollywood and for financial reasons they don't

[1:07:59] like to shoot on location and now that so many things are just cgi'd in any way like there's even

[1:08:07] less reason for people to shoot on location even when that adds so much in terms of like character

[1:08:14] and if you're like hiring local actors well i mean the fact that like you so much is shot in atlanta

[1:08:18] now but yeah it's not like things have an atlanta flavor to them or anything like that because it is

[1:08:23] all on digital sound stages and stuff like that and i feel like also uh even with like animated

[1:08:29] work there's such a push for like known uh non-animation actors to do all the voices and

[1:08:35] you're like but they all have boring sounding voices i want voice actors who have cool weird

[1:08:39] sounding voices i feel like this it's all this is a it's a it's kind of like a one consequence of

[1:08:45] that larger kind of cultural flattening that had people have been complaining about in america for

[1:08:50] many decades that like the idea of regional things is not quite the same because everyone goes to the

[1:08:55] same chain stores and goes to and has watches the same shows on tv listens to the same songs

[1:09:00] i mean ironically except for like except for like how to with john wilson well the thing the most

[1:09:05] new york thing in the world yes that's true well the that let me there's obviously lots of

[1:09:09] exceptions it's funny because people are always like our culture is too fractured nobody nobody

[1:09:14] shares a common thing but at the same time the genuine general flavor of culture has kind of

[1:09:18] become this for the most part a tepid mishmash whereas in the past like you also would see like

[1:09:24] regional filmmaking where it was like this movie is for this particular market like we know we can

[1:09:28] make this this much money in this market so we're going to make a movie that is aimed at that market

[1:09:32] and now it's much more of a like well every movie is going to cost us two to seven hundred million

[1:09:38] dollars so we still have the widest possible appeal and the most you can get towards the

[1:09:42] dialect is like there's the immigrant shopkeeper who goes like yes spidey as spider-man swings by

[1:09:48] you know yeah okay well um let's move on to the final segment which is recommendations uh

[1:09:56] things that would be a better use of your time than the

[1:10:00] of the Rollerblade 7. I mean, it's hard to imagine something that would be a worse use of your time

[1:10:04] than the Legend of Rollerblade 7. Yeah. Like, taking, just taking a, just taking a club and

[1:10:08] hitting yourself over the head with it, that would, I guess, be a worse use of your time,

[1:10:11] you know. Jeez Louise. Uh, so. Like, just, just like, just locking yourself in a bank vault for

[1:10:17] a year, like that would be a worse use of your time, yeah. While, uh, the Writers Guild is on

[1:10:21] strike, SAG-AFTRA as well, of course, but we're, Elliot and I are members of the Writers Guild.

[1:10:27] You're behind camera talent, is what you're saying. Yes, we are not pretty enough to be

[1:10:31] featured. I don't know, Dan, Dan played us, played Santa Claus once in that, that Daily

[1:10:34] Show episode, right? That's true, and Stuart and I were, of course, in the major motion picture

[1:10:39] of Snatchers. Yeah. We were in the major motion picture of Snatchers, and I think there was a

[1:10:43] little guy named Tube Man, but we're not talking about me, we're talking about you guys. And that

[1:10:48] was a voice only, so you were not in front of the camera for that. Uh-huh, but that's why I'm

[1:10:51] saying we need more great voice actors like me. Uh, no, we're, we're trying to recommend things

[1:10:58] that aren't, uh, current media, at the very least, and, uh, boy, am I recommending something that,

[1:11:06] you know, people probably don't watch in general, uh, that frequently. It's called

[1:11:12] The Dark Backward. Dark fighting? Daniel. Oh, yeah. No, it's a movie called The Dark

[1:11:15] Backward from 1991, directed by Adam Rifkin of, uh, Invisible Maniac fame.

[1:11:22] It is a movie set, like, talk about low-budget dystopias, it is set in this weird garbage world

[1:11:28] that feels like sort of a Pee-wee's Playhouse version of Delicatessen by way of, like, the

[1:11:34] grossest Monty Python sketch you would see, and it has Judd Nelson playing an extremely sweaty,

[1:11:42] introverted, bad, uh, stand-up comic, and it has Bill Paxton playing his best friend who, who's,

[1:11:50] like, if you think Bill Paxton is giving it his all in Aliens, like, like, ten times that amount,

[1:11:58] it is, like, full-on, like, over-the-top, but beautiful Bill Paxton, and he, like, moves from

[1:12:04] being sort of all, like, chummy, uh, like, best friend to, like, chillingly unfeeling from scene

[1:12:13] to scene. What a, what a talent. Yeah. R.I.P. Have you seen this story? You were nodding along. Yeah,

[1:12:19] it is a film that is, like, about, it is, like, really trying to make things as unpleasant for

[1:12:24] you as possible, but in a weirdly sweet kind of way, like, there's something about it that doesn't

[1:12:30] just feel like Edgelord unpleasantness, it just feels like, I don't know, like, what if we put a

[1:12:37] bunch of trash in your eyes, but made you enjoy it somehow? Uh, I had a lot of fun watching it,

[1:12:43] like, there's stuff in it that, like, I really, really laughed at. I think it repeats a little,

[1:12:48] maybe, it's a little long, like, Adam Rifkin wrote the screenplay when he was, like, 19,

[1:12:52] so I think we can forget him, forgive him for, uh, maybe hammering a few things a little too much,

[1:12:58] but, uh, it's a, if you're a fan of weird movies, if me talking about how unpleasant a lot of it is

[1:13:06] intrigued you rather than put you off, you might like this movie. Uh, as, as Dan said, we're trying

[1:13:12] not to recommend new stuff, and in fact, I'm not going to recommend a movie at all today. I'm going

[1:13:18] to recommend, uh, my favorite board game from the last couple years. I'm going to recommend a game

[1:13:22] called Root. Uh, it's put out by, published by Later Games. It's, uh, created by Cole Worley,

[1:13:30] one of my favorite game designers. I try to play all of his games. Root is a asymmetric, uh, war

[1:13:36] game with very cute little animal creatures that are fighting for control over a woodland,

[1:13:42] and, uh, all the various factions play completely differently. As a fan of game systems, I find it

[1:13:49] kind of fascinating, but as a gameplay experience, it is one where, uh, you are kind of constantly,

[1:13:56] uh, there's, uh, constant player interaction, uh, which I like. I like a game where everybody at the

[1:14:03] table is do, like, in order to do something, you are, uh, you are getting in somebody else's way,

[1:14:09] and it forces interaction between players as opposed to, like, you know, a complicated

[1:14:13] solitaire-type game. Uh, Root is very cute. You can get it at specialty game shops. Uh,

[1:14:19] if you like a challenging game experience, why don't you check it out? Um, and I think it also,

[1:14:23] it just started being sold at Target, so, uh, it's available out there. R-O-O-T, Root, check it out.

[1:14:31] And I'm going to recommend, uh, also a, a movie. I'm not going to recommend a game,

[1:14:35] but I recommend a movie that I guess you could make a game out of if you wanted to, if you,

[1:14:40] well, probably not, actually. It's okay, Elliot, we forgive you for not recommending a game.

[1:14:44] Can't figure, can't figure it out. Yeah, well, maybe, uh, yeah, it's called Rubik's Cube. It's

[1:14:47] a cube, and you rub it, and you just rub it around. I made a show about it. Elliot's recommending

[1:14:53] Escape Room Tournament of Champions. That's odd for Elliot, but I'll go along with it.

[1:14:58] So, uh, this, uh, a movie I want to recommend is a short documentary, uh, that Martin Scorsese

[1:15:03] directed in 1978 called American Boy, and this is, uh, a series of stories being told, uh, by

[1:15:10] Stephen Prince, who is best known to me as the man who played the gun dealer in Taxi Driver, who,

[1:15:16] uh, was, is handing off all that stuff, that stuff, but you want a new Cadillac with pink slip,

[1:15:21] I'll get it for you, that kind of stuff. Uh, he was someone who worked in, um, kind of stage

[1:15:26] management and, uh, live performance tech, and he tells a series of stories about growing up in the

[1:15:35] United States in the 50s and his experiences working that become increasingly dark as they

[1:15:41] become more and more about his experiences as a drug addict and with violence, and he's, uh, he's

[1:15:47] a, an entertaining storyteller, but the stories themselves kind of, like, get harsher and harsher

[1:15:52] in a way that I never found disturbing, but instead it, it feels like you are, uh, you are

[1:16:00] seeing both sides of kind of the American story, because this is interspersed with home movie

[1:16:04] footage of him as a little kid, where you're hearing about his family, his upbringing, being,

[1:16:09] you know, growing up in the, the time that our parents grew up in, and then you're hearing about

[1:16:12] these kind of underworld tales and, and sometimes just, uh, frightening things and sometimes just,

[1:16:19] uh, decadent things, and among the stories he tells, one involves him having to stab a woman

[1:16:25] undergoing an overdose with an adrenaline needle, and it was that story that, uh, inspired that

[1:16:29] scene in Pulp Fiction, so if you want to know the, I guess, true life event that inspired that,

[1:16:34] that famous scene, uh, he's talking about it, and it's, uh, yeah, it's a movie I've been,

[1:16:40] I've been wanting to see for a long time, and I recently was able to, and it is, I found it

[1:16:45] very entertaining and riveting, considering it's just a guy sitting down telling these stories,

[1:16:49] although it opens with, it's one of the few interview documentaries that somehow opens with

[1:16:53] a fight scene, and, uh, you'll, you'll see how that happens, uh, if you watch it.

[1:16:58] And it's called The Boy and His Blob, what's it called?

[1:17:01] It's called, it's a video game.

[1:17:02] It's called A Boy and His Blob.

[1:17:03] It's called Toe Jam and Earl, yep, no, it's good, it's good, it's called American Boy.

[1:17:07] This Economy?

[1:17:09] It's called Cocker's Bad Fur Day.

[1:17:11] Uh, and those are the names of some video games from our past.

[1:17:17] They are, yeah, I mean, we can mention more if you want, Marble Madness, Bubble Bobble, yeah.

[1:17:23] It's all true, Kid Icarus, and, so, I remember when Hallie was like, I played Kid Icarus, too.

[1:17:31] Um, hey, everyone, uh, before I go, one more plug, if you go to theflophouse.simplix.com,

[1:17:39] you can buy tickets for Flop TV, if that's a thing that interests you.

[1:17:42] If you are in the LA area, uh, we have shows coming up at Vidiot's in October.

[1:17:49] You can buy through their website.

[1:17:51] Go to vidiotsfoundation.org.

[1:17:53] Uh, yeah, I will hopefully remember to put a website, uh, link on our site as well by then.

[1:18:00] Um, and I would like to thank our producer, uh, Alex Smith, who goes by the name HowlDotty

[1:18:08] on various, uh, internet sites.

[1:18:11] Uh, look up his work, including his own podcast, Fast Track.

[1:18:15] Um, go to maximumfund.org, our podcasting network, to find other great shows.

[1:18:23] If you like this show, we are supported entirely, well, not entirely, we get a little advertising,

[1:18:30] but an overwhelming amount by listeners, uh, through memberships of MaxFund.

[1:18:35] If you cannot afford at this point to support us that way,

[1:18:39] you can spread the word about The Flophouse.

[1:18:42] It's very helpful for us.

[1:18:43] If you, uh, have the moment, take, uh, some time and leave us a good review on iTunes.

[1:18:51] If you have a bad review, you can write it down, put it in an envelope, and slip it down the sewers,

[1:18:59] uh, for Michelangelo and Don Tello and anyone.

[1:19:03] The Ninja Turtles might not listen to the podcast.

[1:19:05] If you have a bad review, write it on paper, just put an envelope,

[1:19:08] shove it up your butt, you don't need to hear it.

[1:19:10] But if you do leave us a negative review, please be clear if it's because you don't

[1:19:14] enjoy our politics, so that we can then dismiss your negative review out of hand.

[1:19:18] Yeah, um, but, uh, I guess that's all I have to say about that.

[1:19:22] For The Flophouse, I've been Dan McCoy.

[1:19:25] I'm Stuart Wellington.

[1:19:27] And I'm Elliot Kalin saying, hey guys, let's roll.

[1:19:32] On, on wheels, on rollerblade wheels.

[1:19:33] That's cool, no, I like it.

[1:19:34] Yeah, yeah.

[1:19:35] Unroll it, wait, hold on, let me try again.

[1:19:37] Guys, let's rollerblade.

[1:19:39] Does that work?

[1:19:40] No, it's not as cool.

[1:19:41] Okay, how about this?

[1:19:42] Guys, let's...

[1:19:43] Seven...

[1:19:46] One more.

[1:19:47] Hey guys, let's end the show.

[1:19:51] Bye.

[1:19:57] Bye.

[1:20:00] everyone and welcome to no that's not how it starts we gotta do an intro first not at all

[1:20:07] okay and it goes like this on this episode we discuss the legend of the rollerblade seven

[1:20:14] part two in our legends series a legendary small member okay let's go maximum fun a worker-owned

[1:20:26] network of artists-owned shows supported directly by you

Ep.#405 - The Legend of the Roller Blade Seven

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