Jurassic World: Rebirth

[0:00] On this episode we discuss Jurassic World Rebirth.

[0:04] The dinosaur movie for people who don't give a shit about dinosaurs.

[0:30] Hey everyone and welcome to the Flophouse. I'm Dan McCoy.

[0:33] I'm Stuart Wellington.

[0:35] You surprised me.

[0:37] I'm Ellie Kaelin, worried about Stuart Wellington.

[0:40] I think it's time to give him one of those cognitive tests that the president keeps facing.

[0:43] Honestly, we talked so much before the show started rolling

[0:47] that I think that by the time it's happened, Stuart was like,

[0:50] oh wait, okay, this is different.

[0:52] Yeah, I thought we had done the show already.

[0:54] Yeah, he was already on his way home.

[0:58] Riding his bicycle.

[1:00] In my head I'm like, so I've got to pick up eggs, bread, more eggs, bananas.

[1:06] Someone's making French toast.

[1:08] Ooh la la.

[1:10] Okay, well, on this podcast we watch a bad movie and talk about it.

[1:14] Yeah, because French toast is toast with tongue, Dan.

[1:16] That's what it is, yeah.

[1:18] We watch a bad movie, then we talk about it.

[1:20] Yeah, a film that perhaps audiences or critics rejected or both

[1:24] and then we see what we have to say about it.

[1:27] We are the final judges.

[1:29] Yeah, only us can judge.

[1:31] Sorry, go on.

[1:33] This episode, audiences did not reject it.

[1:35] It made a lot of money, so it was not a financial flop.

[1:37] It was the fifth highest grossing film of 2025.

[1:40] Even though when I mentioned it to somebody recently, they said,

[1:43] there was another Jurassic Park movie?

[1:45] That honestly fucking shocks me.

[1:48] This movie feels like it just disappeared into the ether.

[1:52] I can understand, I guess, people being like,

[1:55] oh, I still like Jurassic Park.

[1:58] I'm tired of the Chris Pratt arc of it.

[2:02] So maybe seeing ScarJo up there on the screen and Dinosaurs,

[2:06] they're like, yeah, I'll give it a shot.

[2:08] But beyond that, I find that very confusing

[2:11] just because it's been diminishing returns for decades now.

[2:15] Did it make less money than the last one?

[2:18] I think it might have made more, but I'm not sure.

[2:21] Let's look up according to Wikipedia whether it did.

[2:23] But this was also, I have to imagine,

[2:25] I didn't get to go to the theaters this much this year.

[2:27] This seems like a year of very few movies, to be honest.

[2:30] I'm looking at the top ten movies of 2025, highest grossing,

[2:33] according to Wikipedia, and F1 is number eight.

[2:36] F1 did better than I thought, but that's a surprise to me, that F1 did so well.

[2:40] What, did dads go to movies?

[2:42] Dads don't get to go to movies, if I'm any indication.

[2:45] Well, I mean, we've talked about it before.

[2:47] I don't want to get into too much bitterness,

[2:49] but the entertainment industry in that way is in this weird death spiral

[2:52] where they're like, I don't know, things aren't doing well.

[2:55] What we should do is make less stuff.

[2:57] It's like, well, that's going to make it worse, guys.

[3:00] You've got to recommit to actually doing new things and a lot of them.

[3:05] So it made less money than the last one.

[3:09] I didn't realize.

[3:10] So this says that, according to Wikipedia,

[3:12] Jurassic World Dominion made over a billion dollars worldwide.

[3:17] You could open a dinosaur park with that kind of money.

[3:19] I mean, the budget was $465 million,

[3:21] so it's possible that movie barely broke even with it making a billion dollars.

[3:26] But that's according to Wikipedia.

[3:28] But also of the top five movies of the year, according to Wikipedia,

[3:33] Jurassic World is the only one that's not a family film,

[3:36] a family or children's film.

[3:37] So that shows you kind of why people are going to the movies,

[3:40] which is that you've got to do something with those kids.

[3:43] You've got to find something to do with them for a couple hours.

[3:45] Anyway, that was what I call the Caitlyn box office report.

[3:48] I mean, anything good in that box office report?

[3:51] Anything good in the – anything above it in – anything good on that list?

[3:55] Anything that you've seen that you're like, that's a good movie?

[3:58] Ironically, the only movies I see in the theaters now are movies I take my kids to.

[4:01] So I saw three out of the five.

[4:03] So like Sinners and –

[4:04] Yeah, yeah, Sinners, exactly, yeah.

[4:06] The – yeah, yeah, Eddington.

[4:10] It looks like number one is a Chinese movie I'm not familiar with, Ninja 2.

[4:16] Then there's Lilo and Stitch, the live-action remake, and Zootopia 2,

[4:20] and then a Minecraft movie, the top four, and then Jurassic Park.

[4:24] So you saw at least the – you saw the Minecraft one, right?

[4:27] I saw Lilo and Stitch. I saw a Minecraft movie, and I saw Zootopia 2.

[4:30] Oh, okay.

[4:31] Or Two-topia as it should have been called.

[4:32] Two-topia, yeah.

[4:33] Or Zootopia.

[4:34] Zootopia I think makes more sense because it keeps the zoo in the title.

[4:38] Zootopia makes you think that it's a world of twos, yeah, living twos.

[4:42] Yeah, good point.

[4:43] Yeah, sorry.

[4:44] As Elliot mentioned, I wandered away for a second.

[4:46] I realized that the computer was not plugged in, which could cause issues later on down the line.

[4:52] Yeah, probably.

[4:53] It was a race against time.

[4:54] But let's get into – now that we've talked about the box office, the most important thing, of course, in today's society.

[5:00] Well, no, but it's just surprising that – so the first Jurassic Park, we've talked about it before.

[5:04] It was the biggest movie in the world.

[5:06] It was one of the biggest movies of all time.

[5:07] It was so magical.

[5:08] It had such a big impact I think on all of us, certainly on me, but also on culture in general, and it's amazing.

[5:15] This is something that other people have said a million times.

[5:17] It's the thing you talk about with Avatar, that like this movie was a big hit.

[5:22] But I don't know – like nobody I know talks about it, thinks about it, has mentioned it.

[5:27] It's just not something that's on people's minds.

[5:29] Yeah, I mean I'm not going to dog on Jimmy C over here, but the first Jurassic Park –

[5:35] Jimmy Carter?

[5:36] Yeah, that's who – yeah, Jimmy Carter, director of Avatar.

[5:41] I mean I bet – there's a chance Jimmy Carter saw Avatar, guys, and I bet he would like it.

[5:46] There is a chance he saw Avatar, yeah.

[5:49] But what I'm saying is that –

[5:50] I sympathize with that message of environmentalism.

[5:53] Yeah, exactly.

[5:54] If only I could be put into a Na'vi body.

[5:58] To live again.

[5:59] To stick my ponytail into another flying alien.

[6:03] To make it run through a tree or something.

[6:05] Do they grow peanuts on other planets?

[6:07] I'd like to find out.

[6:09] The – but what I'm saying is that having recently re-watched the original Jurassic Park, like,

[6:14] it – the effects still hold up.

[6:17] Like, it's great.

[6:18] By the way, I can't remember whether I told this story on the podcast or just to you guys privately.

[6:23] But I want to –

[6:24] Tell it again.

[6:25] Mention it again, which was that, like, originally, like, I started watching this movie on Peacock

[6:31] before we were going to do it for the show.

[6:33] And then I, like, stopped because I'm like, why am I doing this?

[6:35] Like, we should – if I'm going to watch this thing, I should be watching it for the show.

[6:39] I'm not going to enjoy it.

[6:40] You want to get paid for it, yeah.

[6:42] But I thought I was watching it because I saw that it was on Peacock.

[6:48] And I'm like, yeah, Jurassic Park.

[6:49] I, like, clicked on it because it had been up front.

[6:52] And the first scene started.

[6:54] And I'm like, wow.

[6:55] Wow, this is doing a really good pastiche of Spielberg.

[6:59] Like a really – whoever, you know, like they did a good job.

[7:02] And then I realized, like, oh, no, like because they had this movie on Peacock, they had also added all the other Jurassic Parks.

[7:10] And I had accidentally clicked on the first one and forgotten that that begins with the scene where they're, like, loading up a dino in the crate and whatever.

[7:18] But this movie is the first scene.

[7:22] You're like Sam Neill is looking great.

[7:24] He looks like he looked in 1993.

[7:27] Yeah, it was when Sam Neill showed up that I'm like, oh, oh, oh.

[7:30] It wasn't when the title Jurassic Park came up on screen?

[7:34] Did that happen beforehand?

[7:35] I can't remember.

[7:36] I don't remember.

[7:37] Maybe it didn't.

[7:38] Anyway, this movie, less, you know, skillful in its filmmaking perhaps.

[7:45] What?

[7:46] Let's get into the details.

[7:47] I mean it is no – it is no harsh words to say perhaps less skillful than Steven Spielberg, one of the greatest filmmakers of all time.

[7:54] Yeah.

[7:55] I mean this is a movie not to, like, tip Final Judge was too early where, like, a lot of talented people are involved.

[8:02] I don't necessarily blame any of them.

[8:05] It's like I don't necessarily blame the director, screenwriter, actors because they've done good work before and I presume will do good work in the future.

[8:14] It's a thing where I blame the system.

[8:18] The larger question – maybe this is where you're going, what I know.

[8:20] The larger question is do we need any more Jurassic Park movies?

[8:23] Yes.

[8:24] I feel like that's where the answer is potentially no and they did the incorrect answer, which is yes, and then through no fault of their own, everyone was trying hard in this movie.

[8:33] But anyway, you'll –

[8:34] And I also feel like in this modern world, like the way blockbusters are made, no one gets the time to actually, like, seriously do the pre-production work that's necessary, like the planning out.

[8:47] Like people are like, oh, we've got digital cameras.

[8:50] We can just cover everything and cut it together however it doesn't matter.

[8:54] Like I feel like the whole process is not built for smartly made blockbusters anymore.

[9:02] I would imagine that the role of director in something like this is more like managing the circus rather than actually making a movie.

[9:10] Like the making a movie is less like making a film and more like how do I navigate all the bullshit that has to go into making this mega movie?

[9:19] Yeah.

[9:20] Well, I'm sure they have less creative control than they might like.

[9:23] What?

[9:24] Anyway.

[9:25] So the movie starts.

[9:27] Oh.

[9:28] 2008.

[9:29] Well, that's nice.

[9:30] It's off to a good beginning.

[9:32] Some movies never start.

[9:34] Yeah, like –

[9:36] The Day the Clown Cried.

[9:38] The Schmeelborgs.

[9:40] That movie never started.

[9:41] I just made it up.

[9:42] Never started at all.

[9:44] Yeah.

[9:45] So we're in some –

[9:47] Invasion of the Cat Police.

[9:49] Again, never started.

[9:51] It's a real shame because that sounds great.

[9:53] Sounds great.

[9:54] I would love to do that.

[9:55] All the little kitty cats in those little police uniforms.

[9:56] Yeah, yeah.

[9:57] Oh, that's the kind – what we're talking about.

[9:59] Those people that police the cats.

[10:00] Oh, little Tabby, you've got to get back in your cage.

[10:07] All right, nothing to see here, just a bit of couch.

[10:14] Leave that poor bird alone.

[10:17] OK, I believe the sofa's got the message.

[10:20] Put the claws away.

[10:25] There'll be a place for what you're doing, and it's called the litter box.

[10:29] Let's get moving to it, Tabby.

[10:31] OK, not like this version of it, where there are tiny cops, tiny Irish cops

[10:35] that just make sure cats follow the rules.

[10:38] And, you know, herding cats, famously difficult.

[10:42] A lot of alcoholism in the cat movies.

[10:46] It's a very difficult posting.

[10:49] Yeah, because they're little, and a thimble full of alcohol will fuck them up.

[10:53] Yeah, that's the point.

[10:59] Super easy to overdo it.

[11:01] To be honest, why didn't they make this movie?

[11:03] Guys, I don't understand.

[11:05] That's the family of Hollywood, just like Jurassic Park.

[11:08] You're like fucking Domhnall Gleeson to be one of the cops.

[11:11] He looks like Donald, sorry, Domhnall.

[11:13] It's funnier to say it, Domhnall.

[11:16] Stuart, you used to just proudly mispronounce people's names all the time.

[11:20] You've changed, man.

[11:21] I know.

[11:22] So, yeah, back in 2008, we're at some engine facility devoted to genetically modified dinos.

[11:30] And security fails there because of a really dumb accident with a candy wrapper.

[11:35] I don't like the Final Destination-ness of it.

[11:37] It is very Final Destination.

[11:38] I will say this.

[11:39] This is the first of a hint of what is one of the themes of this movie,

[11:43] which is that people are tired of dinosaurs, which is such bullshit.

[11:47] I had so much trouble believing it.

[11:49] As you'll see, they're like, we're shutting down the dinosaur museum.

[11:52] Dinosaurs aren't special anymore.

[11:53] And I'm like, have you been to a zoo?

[11:55] It's the same fucking animals we've been seeing for hundreds of years.

[11:58] People still love them.

[11:59] People don't care.

[12:01] To borrow a critique from –

[12:04] Griffin and Blankcheck was talking about this.

[12:06] Don't start a movie by being like, hey, this thing is boring.

[12:10] The thing that you like that you're seeing the movie about, it's stupid and people don't like it.

[12:14] It's dumb and boring.

[12:15] Why am I supposed to care about a movie if you're telling me that it's shit?

[12:19] I feel like it is supposed to be this meta commentary on like, oh, like Jurassic Park movies aren't special anymore.

[12:26] It's like, well, yeah, well, then don't make the goddamn movie.

[12:29] What the fuck?

[12:30] It's like in the third Mummy movie when the brother of everybody is like sick of mummies.

[12:36] He's like mummies show up.

[12:37] He's like, oh, mummies again.

[12:39] I hate these guys.

[12:40] I like that you described him as the brother of everybody, which he is.

[12:42] We're all brothers.

[12:44] I mean, he's the human family.

[12:46] He's Rachel Weisz's brother, but then he's the brother-in-law to Brendan Fraser.

[12:52] That's true.

[12:54] Got a Rachel Weisz vice.

[12:56] Oh, I guess it's not Rachel Weisz, though.

[12:58] It's Kate Beckinsale.

[13:02] Yeah, right.

[13:03] Oh, I'm sorry.

[13:04] It's been a long time since I've tried to explore with the Dragon Emperor's Tomb.

[13:08] The Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

[13:10] We should really be apologizing to Kate Beckinsale.

[13:12] I mean, she's great.

[13:14] So anyway, the security fails because of a candy wrapper, and I'm like, this is bad security.

[13:20] If this one candy wrapper can do it.

[13:23] But anyway, a guy gets eaten by a dino, a big monster mutant dino.

[13:28] D-Rex.

[13:29] This is the D-Rex, which is – we'll see it more later.

[13:31] And it's basically they made a Rancor.

[13:33] Like at this point, they're like, we're not even trying to make them like dinosaurs.

[13:36] They're just Rancors.

[13:37] I think it kind of looked like a Xenomorph dinosaur because it had that big, like bulbous head.

[13:42] Yeah, like a –

[13:43] No one else has like a big bulbous head like that?

[13:45] A Rancor.

[13:46] But yeah, Dan, you're right.

[13:47] I think this is more like a squat sort of like snub head.

[13:50] It would have been really cool if there were like Gamorrean guards as well.

[13:54] If they had like – if they're already fucking DNA pooling.

[13:58] Like kids are tired of dinosaurs.

[14:00] We're just remaking all the creatures from the Java sequence in Return of the Jedi.

[14:03] And then I can finally have a salacious crumb.

[14:05] This would be great.

[14:06] I like the idea that they're like, yeah, so the dinos ain't working – ain't paying all the bills.

[14:11] So we also need to be genetically modifying things to look like Star Wars crap or Disney World or whatever.

[14:16] We got a pig.

[14:17] We turned it into a Gamorrean guard.

[14:19] We can't get them to be green.

[14:20] That's the problem.

[14:21] We can't correct that.

[14:22] You paint them.

[14:23] It's fine.

[14:24] It's fine.

[14:25] They just – they lick the paint off because again, they're pigs.

[14:27] They're not – we have – it's hard to get them to hold an axe because they're not tool-using animals.

[14:31] You tape it to their hands or hooves, upper hooves.

[14:36] Anyway, after this accident –

[14:38] We are the guys who are bringing out – we're showing the executives what we've been able to do so far with the Gamorrean guard project.

[14:44] They're like, all right.

[14:46] I like that it's a pig on two legs.

[14:48] Here are my criticisms.

[14:50] Wrong color.

[14:51] It's easy to tell the axe is taped to his upper hoof.

[14:54] Yeah, we're working on that.

[14:55] We're working on that.

[14:56] And actually I think audiences will appreciate that they can see the seams, you know, that they can tell that it's kind of lo-fi.

[15:04] It makes it feel more real, you know.

[15:06] After this accident, we flash forward to 2025.

[15:09] This is all, of course, in the same mainline continuity.

[15:13] Of course.

[15:14] Did you guys see the last one?

[15:15] Did you see the last one?

[15:16] I didn't see the last one.

[15:17] I never saw it.

[15:18] I kind of wanted to because it had the returning cast, but I never actually saw it.

[15:21] We didn't do that for the show?

[15:22] No, we did the middle one.

[15:23] Oh, okay.

[15:24] And I didn't see the one before that.

[15:26] So I feel like I'm just – I'm out to sea here.

[15:29] Here's what you need to know.

[15:30] There was a dinosaur theme park and it went wrong.

[15:32] No, but didn't, like, the dinos get out and, like, spread around the planet for a minute?

[15:36] Yeah, at the end of the one we saw, the dinosaurs got out and they're everywhere.

[15:39] And now this movie starts – the dinosaurs start dying off.

[15:41] And they're, like, getting fucking jobs and shit and having to go to work.

[15:44] Yeah.

[15:45] Yeah.

[15:46] It's the money-for-nothing video but with dinosaurs.

[15:48] Oh, you've got to move these microwave ovens.

[15:50] Pterodactyls, you know, turntable now and – cool.

[15:54] Yeah, I like it.

[15:55] Yeah, yeah.

[15:56] It's a living – yeah, et cetera.

[15:57] Yeah.

[15:58] Well, the pterodactyl would be the needle, right?

[16:01] So, yeah, we're in the same continuity and the Earth's climate has proved – climath?

[16:07] Climate has proved –

[16:09] I was going to let it go.

[16:10] I was going to let it go and I'm glad you called it out that it is the climath, yeah.

[16:13] It's proved inhospitable for these dinos.

[16:16] So most of them are, you know, around equatorial regions where people aren't allowed to go.

[16:22] And like you said, everyone is bored of the dinos, which is represented by –

[16:27] we see Pharma representative Martin Krebs played by Rupert Friend being bored by a traffic jam in Brooklyn where there's like a brontosaurus –

[16:36] Caused by like the last living brontosaurus in captivity or whatever.

[16:41] Yeah.

[16:42] Last living brontosaurus in New York.

[16:45] Yeah.

[16:46] And he's like, ho-hum.

[16:50] Which as the creator of Maniac of New York, I kind of like that idea.

[16:54] Yeah.

[16:55] People are – like it's just a part of everyday life.

[16:57] Yeah, I expected some kids to be showtiming off of it.

[17:00] That would have been great.

[17:02] They're tagging the side of this poor dinosaur.

[17:05] Oh.

[17:06] Sliding down his back.

[17:08] Yeah, because they just – the whistle got pulled at work so they're sliding down his back to get into their car.

[17:13] Yeah.

[17:14] It's all Flintstones, Dan.

[17:15] You need another cultural touchstone for dinosaurs other than the Flintstones.

[17:18] Well, for dinos and humans living together, I mean that's the –

[17:21] If they're already DNA fooling with dinosaurs, why don't they try and make like Fred Flintstones and shit too for –

[17:27] So here's the thing.

[17:28] Fred Flintstone is just a person.

[17:30] Anyone can make a Fred Flintstone if you have a son.

[17:33] Just dress him in a belt.

[17:36] I mean Hollywood made a Fred Flintstone.

[17:38] His body is pretty wild though, right?

[17:39] His name is John Goodman in the Flintstones movie.

[17:41] His body is pretty rectangular.

[17:43] That's true, and his head takes up a huge amount of his general silhouette.

[17:46] Yeah.

[17:47] It's just sort of like one-third.

[17:50] Yeah, I mean because the thing is you could just put a person but like people want it to look like the cartoon, right?

[17:55] Yeah.

[17:56] Yeah, that's what people want.

[17:57] They want genetically modified things from the past to look like the cartoon.

[18:01] That's what I think we've – maybe we've talked about this before.

[18:03] Every time I go on YouTube to listen to music because I like to –

[18:06] YouTube has been great for me for discovering music that I never would have known about before.

[18:09] It's bad for everything else.

[18:11] It wants me to watch videos people have made where they use AI to create –

[18:15] here's what this cartoon character would look like in real life.

[18:18] There's one for the Flintstones that keeps coming up.

[18:20] The thing I think is funny is that the male characters, it's like, yeah, that's pretty all right.

[18:24] The female characters are always way bustier and show way more cleavage.

[18:28] I'm like I don't remember Betty Rubble with cleavage.

[18:30] Like this doesn't seem right.

[18:31] But it's very funny that it's really showing you who's making these, what they want out of them.

[18:36] Or rather who's telling the computer to make these.

[18:39] Yeah, so this farming guy meets with Zora Bennett who is played by Scarlett Johansson.

[18:44] If you're going to have horny Flintstones characters, I want a human hand to create everything.

[18:49] I want their individual hang-ups and kinks to inform every line.

[18:55] The horniness of the artist has to come through.

[18:58] So we got Scarlett Johansson.

[19:00] Now she is arguably one of the most bankable action stars in the world, right?

[19:07] Like she's been in so many huge movies.

[19:09] I mean if you count the Avengers movies in there I guess.

[19:12] I do, yeah.

[19:13] But I don't know if I would say star of, yeah.

[19:15] Outside of that, I don't know if I necessarily, if people think of her as like an action star necessarily.

[19:21] She's a great actress, you know.

[19:23] But maybe I'm wrong.

[19:25] I do.

[19:26] I think, I mean I would say a jack-of-all-trades.

[19:28] I mean like, yeah.

[19:29] She is a scarjo of all trades, yeah.

[19:32] She's a great range.

[19:33] She can do all kinds of different things.

[19:35] But I'm with Ellie.

[19:37] I wouldn't be like, oh, you know, like bankable action star.

[19:39] But like she can headline a blockbuster for sure.

[19:42] And she's certainly very good in an action scene.

[19:44] She's really good at it.

[19:45] But I think – so she's playing a character who is a mercenary but also a nice, friendly mercenary with a heart of gold who never has to learn a lesson because she's already a sweet person.

[19:56] And I had a lot of trouble buying the character of the sweet, loving mercenary.

[20:00] Yeah, yeah, I mean that no characters have any

[20:03] Traits in this the Rupert friend character is an evil. He's basically Paul Reiser and aliens. He's not

[20:09] He's not as good. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I read as good

[20:12] Yeah, I read some review that pointed out that if any character has some sort of tragic backstory

[20:18] They survive and any character that doesn't have one gets eaten

[20:22] Yes

[20:23] I mean the characters this movie is not

[20:25] Hiding the ball at all over which characters are gonna get eaten and which ones are not like the cannon fodder

[20:29] They might as well just walk up and go don't bother learning anything about me. You won't have to I'm gonna get eaten by dinosaur

[20:35] Oh Elliot, it's like you've anticipated my notes here

[20:39] Well, so let's talk about so Scarlett Johansson. They meet in a car. Yeah, they meet in the car

[20:44] he wants her to go to the Jurassic Park Zone to retrieve dino material that can help with heart disease and

[20:51] Somehow

[20:53] Lost lost a friend biggest hearts, dude. Yeah. Well, we will get it

[20:56] They lost a friend she lost a friend on her last job, you know part of her boring backstory

[21:02] But it's convinced by the money. She's got offered a lot of money

[21:05] So they go to meet paleontologist Henry Loomis played by the sexiest man alive Jonathan Bailey. Yes

[21:11] Yeah, you got a problem right off the bat. Maybe it's a fun thing. I don't know when you have a character named

[21:15] Dr. Loomis in your movie. I'm going to assume he is related to Donald Pleasants

[21:19] Halloween so every time they went Loomis, I was like, it's Michael Myers on the run and with the Jurassic Park

[21:24] Yeah, it would've been great. I would loved it. I assumed that this was like

[21:29] But like it's a weird one. It's like why are you tipping your captain? Dr. Loomis in this dinosaur? It's weird for the romantic

[21:37] Lee like the romantic character for the for the other star who's supposed to be like the nerdy expert who finds his adventure zone or

[21:44] Whatever looks for him to be a tip of the hat to dr. Loomis

[21:47] Back then Donald Pleasants was

[21:50] People's sexiest man

[21:52] He was people's sexiest man that year your Halloween came out. Yeah. Yes, but a Stewart alluded to

[21:58] Headline on the front said wake in delight Donald Pleasants people sexiest man of the year

[22:03] As Stu alluded to they need material from the biggest dinosaurs because of the biggest hearts

[22:08] So it will help better with heart medicine good thing. They didn't come after me because I have an enormous heart

[22:14] Yes, here's where this is gonna be the first. I hope I could have three four Wang

[22:20] I mean, that's the thing that would make more sense if they're like, hey, yeah, so big farmer really wants to fix dudes boners

[22:26] So we went to we want to give people bigger boners

[22:29] So we're going to the dinos with the biggest dog like that. I'm like, oh, yeah, they would spend so much money on that

[22:35] It would be very funny. I'm gonna grind up these dino horns

[22:39] I'm gonna try not to be too pedantic about the treatment of the dinosaurs in and the other prehistoric animals in the movie because they're

[22:46] Incredibly inaccurate, but there's a mistake they made here where it where it almost to any thin layer of

[22:53] Suspension disbelief that I had where they go to this paleontologist number one the fact that he's like, yeah

[22:57] We're closing down the dinosaur museum because people don't want to be here anymore

[23:00] And I'm like what like what is going on setting that aside that he says we're gonna go after the three biggest dinosaurs

[23:08] Mosasaurus and I'm like right off the bat

[23:09] That's not a dinosaur and then he goes

[23:11] Titanosaurus cats a koala the largest the turret of the of the of the pterosaurs like also not a dinosaur and I

[23:18] Wish that they had made I was like I was bothering my wife about it

[23:21] I was like, here's how you should do that money is he says we need to get samples from a Mosasaurus a

[23:26] Tritonosaur and a quetzalcoatl and then Scarlett Johansson says or something says like, okay the three dinosaurs. Those are three dinosaurs

[23:32] Mosasaurus secondly, not a dinosaur. It's a marine reptile and she can say whatever. It's got Soros in the name

[23:38] I don't you know, whatever nerdling and you use that to one

[23:41] Establish. Oh, this guy is an expert

[23:42] He's real pedantic about some little piece of information that a average viewer may not be aware of two

[23:47] You can make a joke out of it three

[23:49] You start some tension between the two of them so that they don't like each other so that when they do like each other

[23:53] It's a it's a turnip. It's a turnabout and I don't mean to tell David Koepp one of the great modern, you know

[23:58] Blockbuster screenwriters had to do his job

[24:00] It's that would be presumptuous of me

[24:02] But it made me so mad that it's like right off the bat

[24:05] The paleontologist character is calling Mosasaurus a dinosaur

[24:07] Which is the kind of thing that no other character would care about but that character should care about, you know

[24:12] Being specific about those classifications, you know

[24:14] Also, I mean like in the audience will learn something, you know

[24:17] And the audience will learn something about not everything that lived back then those are reptiles a dinosaur marine reptiles

[24:22] Not dinosaurs pterosaurs not dinosaurs. Come on guys. This is all fascinating to you

[24:27] This is off to the side of your complaint, but I

[24:30] Also in the scene like I know you got to have a MacGuffin and like if the movies working

[24:35] I don't really care about this kind of thing, but I was like

[24:38] Why do you have to have stuff from these three dinosaurs? Like it was just that you need like big dino

[24:46] DNA then like why is it like okay, these three dinos are the ones we got again. We got to get all of them

[24:52] Yeah, if you only get to

[24:56] I also found it the fact that even after some of them have died. The others are still like critical model

[25:01] Okay, that's the next one on our list

[25:02] I'll be like what it was so it was hard for me to buy that they still cared that much about this particular mission

[25:09] You know after people start getting eaten by Mosasaurus and things like that, but I don't know

[25:13] Anyway, so guys I was just gonna say we're like pretty deep in the plot of this movie

[25:17] So I think it's an appropriate time to talk about I was doing a little research in the direct the director. It's Gareth Evans

[25:25] Edward Edwards Evans is the is the martial arts guy

[25:29] And I just noticed his last three movies

[25:32] Rogue one the creator and Jurassic World rebirth all have the exact same run time of two hours and 13 minutes

[25:39] Is that some kind of like weird angel number shit? I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't make it up

[25:45] My my guess is that my guess is that and I could be wrong about this

[25:48] My guess is maybe it's just him

[25:49] I don't know

[25:50] My guess is that the studio will say we don't want it to be two and a half hours

[25:54] That's too long and they'll say well we need to be more than two hours for for our

[25:58] You know to tell this story and it's and make it feel like an event

[26:02] My guess is that probably is around the the ballpark where that or the ideal length for one of those movies

[26:07] Studio point of view, you know, I could be wrong about it. It's also like two hour less than two and a half hours

[26:12] I don't think it eats that much into the number of screenings. You can show that kind of thing

[26:15] So anyway, that's my guess. My guess is that there's a reason for that

[26:18] Well, anyway back to the movie that has barely started Jonathan Bailey gets the paleontologist gets drafted into coming along Bailey intelligence

[26:27] Down in the tropics, we are introduced to Zora's old partner Duncan played by Mahershala

[26:32] Mahershala Ali and

[26:34] Always always a welcome face. He's you know doing great work in a movie that you know doesn't deserve him

[26:41] She's got the mercenary. It's rare for a movie to deserve him. He's great

[26:45] So, you know, it's it's hard to find a movie that deserves him

[26:47] Yeah

[26:47] She's got the mercenary crew in the boat and they you know

[26:51] Extort more money from the farmer guy to do this job and there are other characters who are just dino bait

[26:56] So I'm not gonna introduce don't even bother. There's a girl French ish guy

[27:01] Boat boat driver. Um, and this is I don't want to be too hard on the aforementioned

[27:08] Director because I've liked his work before but this scene down in the tropics is the one where I was texting you guys

[27:14] I'm like, there's so much like

[27:16] Unmotivated camera movement like edits that I don't like that will cut just a way to like a far shot

[27:22] You know of them like with the Sun setting in the background is like it's a beautiful shot

[27:27] but I was just thinking about like none of it like it all feels like

[27:31] They just got a bunch of shots. They threw them together

[27:35] You know like they didn't have the time to do what Spielberg does which is like plan

[27:41] The blocking so the movements of the characters like emphasize like shifting dynamics and like the shots mean

[27:48] something it was just like I don't know like the fact that was just an exposition dump made me hyper aware of like

[27:55] What is going on here with the camera? Yeah, the camera movements are just like hey, well, it's a movie

[28:00] So let's just put a bunch of images like a different versions of looking at the same thing. It's a movie

[28:05] So we have to move around

[28:08] Anyway, so they don't call it a standstill II

[28:11] Yeah, I know on the boat. We get a little explainer about how they're gonna collect this dino material

[28:16] they've got these darts that they shoot into the dinos and then like the

[28:20] Canister pops out

[28:22] Yeah

[28:24] Luckily luckily it always pops out in a place. They can catch it easily when it's when it's descending

[28:29] Yeah about the movie

[28:30] That's something they never have to deal with it

[28:32] Like it gets stuck somewhere in a tree branch or something like that or they don't like have to like jump for it or

[28:37] Yeah, we get more

[28:40] Tragic backstory between Scar Joe and Mahershala and it's just all like super wrote like we lost somebody and it does not get me to

[28:47] Care about them anymore. Also, I feel like they are it is a they are mercenaries, right?

[28:52] And it's never it's I think it is supposed to be

[28:55] Cool kind of how vague they are about some of the stuff they're talking about

[28:59] But if it was made clear that these are like they do

[29:03] Rescues, you know where they do they do something that's specific to a good thing, but it's it's like yeah

[29:09] We lost that friend on that mission. It's like I don't know what you were doing

[29:12] Were you doing some kind of black ops mission for Blackwater where you're killing a bunch of civilians in Afghanistan?

[29:18] Like I don't know man

[29:19] Like it was I found it very hard to be sympathetic to these characters knowing that their work involves

[29:25] Going into dangerous situations and I don't know doing what like are they are they like world-class extractors like Tyler Rake in the

[29:33] extraction franchise

[29:35] Exactly. Exactly. And so I wondered if it was another one of the things where I'm like or my dentist

[29:39] I wonder if

[29:43] At some point these were harder and harder bitten characters that were then going to like find their humanity to this adventure or something like

[29:50] That but instead they're just kind of soft from the beginning and it was very hard for me to

[29:53] To buy the idea of like again this lovable team of mercenaries, you know, yeah like every

[30:00] But he is basically nice coded in this movie with the exception of the guy who is Paul

[30:04] Reiser coded.

[30:05] Yeah.

[30:06] And the one and the one mercenary who's who's like the like the weapons guy who doesn't

[30:11] care or something.

[30:12] Yeah.

[30:13] He gets killed.

[30:14] So immediately.

[30:15] Yeah.

[30:16] Yeah.

[30:17] Well, speaking about not caring about characters, we meet the Delgado family.

[30:19] Oh, my God.

[30:20] They're sailing nearby.

[30:21] We get Ruben Delgado and his daughters, Teresa and Isabella.

[30:24] Now, I'm sure you guys were thinking the same thing that I was.

[30:27] Are they named as an homage to the comic book artist Ricardo Delgado, who did the Age

[30:32] of Reptiles comic book series, which is a great set of series that are just stories

[30:36] of dinosaurs and their dinosaurs don't talk like going to work, like going to work, going

[30:42] to do the work of like eating, hunting, but I was like, I was like, if this is a tip of

[30:47] the hat to Ricardo Delgado, that's OK.

[30:49] So you guys really think of the same thing, right?

[30:51] Probably were.

[30:52] Also, there is Xavier, Teresa's boyfriend, who Ruben, the dad, is not into because he's

[30:57] kind of a layabout.

[30:58] I mean, to be honest, he's a pretty he's a pretty crappy kind of like teen boyfriend,

[31:03] you know, at this.

[31:04] He seems to be pretty crappy.

[31:06] He proves himself later on, of course.

[31:09] So why, guys?

[31:12] Why are these guys here?

[31:13] What's the point?

[31:14] I don't know.

[31:15] You got to have some civilians to have in danger.

[31:16] You got to have some kids in danger.

[31:18] That's the Jurassic Park way.

[31:20] I think about like we've already been introduced to the main thrust of the story and then all

[31:25] of a sudden we're like, yeah, and then there's this family that's going across the ocean.

[31:30] They made such a big deal out of, well, this is this belt around this equatorial belt that

[31:34] people are not supposed to go into.

[31:36] It is illegal to go close to Dinosaur Island.

[31:39] And there's a family that's like, yeah, we do it all the time.

[31:41] We're just going to cross the Atlantic or whatever.

[31:43] If we're going to bring other characters in, let me pitch what I will argue is a more interesting

[31:46] idea.

[31:47] OK, you get to the island.

[31:49] There's some people who have been living there, like surviving or like, thank God someone's

[31:53] come to rescue us.

[31:54] And like, oh, like we're not actually here for you.

[31:56] But sure.

[31:57] Well, like, you know, if you want to.

[31:59] Would it be?

[32:00] Yeah.

[32:01] I wonder if there's anyway.

[32:02] Never mind.

[32:03] Forget what I said.

[32:04] Dan, you're great.

[32:05] I'll try.

[32:06] I don't know if I can.

[32:08] I'll forget.

[32:09] But I'll never forget.

[32:10] But I appreciate it.

[32:11] It feels like either like changing the characters that we're dealing with or reorienting the

[32:16] story or like it feels like there's a there's kind of two movies that are slammed into each

[32:20] other.

[32:21] Yeah.

[32:22] This and it's not quite.

[32:23] They're not quite the same.

[32:24] They don't quite mesh as well.

[32:26] They should.

[32:27] But I don't know.

[32:28] But anyway, so there's a big whale dino that overturns their sailboat.

[32:32] And Xavier is trapped.

[32:34] That's that.

[32:35] That's that.

[32:36] Well, that's the one that does have a sail or it doesn't have a sail.

[32:39] It has a sail.

[32:41] Well, so there's the dinosaurs that are helping the Moses.

[32:46] They're like the silver surfer to the Mosasaurus Galactus and then Mosasaurus.

[32:49] That's right.

[32:50] He knocks over the boat.

[32:51] This is also the highly controversial idea that Spinosaurus was an aquatic dinosaur.

[32:55] You know, whether the evidence supports that.

[32:58] I'm not.

[32:59] So I'm not so sold on it.

[33:00] But yeah, the Mosasaurus tips them over, pours them out as if they were a teapot.

[33:04] Xavier is trapped inside the capsizing boat.

[33:07] But he's, you know, the first time he sort of proves his mettle that he gets the emergency

[33:11] bag and gets back to the ship on the other boat.

[33:16] Jonathan Bailey and Scarjo bond over her crying, not just being too hotties.

[33:23] Yeah. And they pick up the Delgado's distress call.

[33:27] And all of the evil coded characters don't want to help our heroes, of course, want to

[33:32] pick them up. And the whale dino resurfaces.

[33:35] We get the first attempt at getting a blood sample.

[33:38] Again, not an actual dino, just an aquatic marine reptile.

[33:41] The big aquatic reptile's blood sample is successfully collected.

[33:47] They did. How exciting was this sequence, guys?

[33:50] Not very. Other dinos attack the ship, killing one of the first extraneous character.

[33:57] And there's a lot of shots of people hanging off of boats and dinos snapping at them.

[34:01] They've scooped up the the family, the Delgado family.

[34:05] Yes. Oh, yeah. Yes.

[34:05] They've already rescued the Delgado's.

[34:07] I don't know why I got so irrationally annoyed when immediately these teenagers are

[34:12] like, oh, well, you've got to take us, you've got to rescue us.

[34:15] You've got to take us back somewhere.

[34:16] I'm like, guys, just get rid of these people.

[34:19] I don't want that. So you're saying the film is not doing farmicide.

[34:24] The film's not doing its job of making you sympathize with these characters and want to

[34:28] see them survive. No, I'm like, get me to that dino island.

[34:32] I don't want to deal with these. Well, I mean, that is a good point, though, that anything

[34:36] in a movie about a dino island, anything that is delaying your arrival to the dino

[34:40] island better be super fun and exciting and enjoyable, because all you're going to be

[34:44] thinking otherwise is like, when do we get to that dino island?

[34:46] That's a good point. Yeah. Yeah.

[34:49] Well, it seems like Rupert Friend feels the same way.

[34:53] Teresa sure does radio for help, but he stops her to keep the mission secret.

[34:58] And the scuffle, she falls off the boat and he does not help pull her back up.

[35:04] But Xavier, the boyfriend, I feel like watching it was like, yeah, yeah, you go, you did it.

[35:09] She later on is accusing him of trying to kill her.

[35:11] And I'm like, I don't I feel like that's a stretch.

[35:16] I feel like she is being unfairly tarred with a murder by inaction.

[35:20] That's the sort of I mean, that's the philosophical question.

[35:23] Is that murder, if it is through inaction rather through actual action, is allowing

[35:27] someone in the middle of a dino attack.

[35:29] I mean, my mistake, marine reptile. Thank you.

[35:32] I think I think that he he has like, I don't think a jury in the world will.

[35:36] I mean, he did accidentally also push her off the boat.

[35:40] I again, I feel like a that's easily defended.

[35:45] I mean, it is less cut and dry than later.

[35:46] He has Mr. Dinosaur Defender.

[35:49] I mean, it's not like some big city dinosaur.

[35:52] I'm a marine reptile.

[35:54] It's not my client.

[35:57] Maybe it's not the best man.

[35:58] Maybe I wouldn't want him to marry my daughter.

[36:01] That's not a crime in these parts.

[36:04] I think a manslaughter conviction would not be out of order for that, perhaps.

[36:08] But we can get that knocked down even more.

[36:11] Yeah, I'm sure he's going to be doing community service for a month.

[36:14] That's it.

[36:14] Yeah.

[36:15] Anyway, the Delgado's all jump in after her and the boat tries to go.

[36:22] Tries for safety in shallow water.

[36:24] But the dinos pushed them into rocks, causing them to crash.

[36:26] This was a very funny strategy on the part of Mahershala Ali, which is,

[36:31] oh, these things are chasing us.

[36:33] We better escape them by crashing the boat so we can't use it anymore.

[36:37] Yeah, it's good thing.

[36:38] I don't think that was the point of the strategy.

[36:42] Anyway, another extraneous character gets killed.

[36:46] R.I.P. Lady Mercenary, who's not securely.

[36:49] I think that's kind of a fun.

[36:50] That's a fun sequence where she like drags this big thing on the beach.

[36:54] And she like goes around to like secure it or something.

[36:57] And in the back, we see the Spinosaur like wake up and then like wander back there.

[37:02] And then just a bunch of screams.

[37:04] Yeah, yeah, we get a pair of anyone, anyone who likes to watch movies where women wear

[37:09] kind of like overalls.

[37:10] That's where that's where your interest in this movie ends.

[37:12] Yeah.

[37:13] No other women wear overalls throughout the rest of the movie.

[37:15] Learn a little bit about Elliot's kinks, I guess.

[37:17] Yeah.

[37:18] What's her name?

[37:19] Gadget.

[37:20] What's the gadget?

[37:21] Hackering.

[37:22] Thank you.

[37:22] She doesn't wear overalls, though.

[37:24] It's more of a yeah, it's a jumpsuit.

[37:25] It's a jumpsuit.

[37:26] Sort of a mechanic's jumpsuit.

[37:27] In the overalls community.

[37:30] We're very clear about that.

[37:31] I feel like Elliot attends some meetings like in the Ulysses chapter.

[37:35] So in Charybdis, where he argues about cartoon characters, fucking outfits.

[37:40] Exactly.

[37:42] So we get.

[37:42] We in the Oshkosh Lagoon community, though, are very particular.

[37:48] We get some info here.

[37:50] Pharma Guy reveals this is where InGen abandoned all of the genetically engineered

[37:55] mutant crossbreed breeds that were too ugly for the park.

[37:59] It's like, yeah, people got tired of regular dinosaurs.

[38:01] They started making mutants.

[38:02] And then they were like, whoa, too much.

[38:04] They dropped them off on a hideo island over here.

[38:07] Uggo Dino Island, we called it.

[38:10] They should have called.

[38:11] So that that that big dinosaur is called the Distortus Rex, which is a pretty good band name.

[38:15] But they should have called it the Uggosaurus Rex.

[38:17] That would be great.

[38:18] Yeah.

[38:19] Zora reveals that the rescue copter is supposed to come for them at sunset

[38:23] the next day if they don't hear from them.

[38:26] So they've got their very specific timing.

[38:30] Yeah.

[38:31] Meanwhile, the Delgados have survived, made it sure they decide to follow some pipes to

[38:36] the abandoned complex looking for a radio.

[38:39] And there's a lot of like just kind of inconsequential walking around.

[38:43] Yeah, we do.

[38:44] The little girl does get like a little dino friend.

[38:47] She adopts a little baby dino named Dolores.

[38:49] It's like a little protoceratops type dinosaur.

[38:52] Yeah, I'm into that.

[38:54] The the mercenary team finds a couple of giant dinos doing kind of a love dance in the field.

[39:00] This is so these are these titanosaurs.

[39:01] And this was.

[39:02] It's crazy with these like bonkers, like Inuyasha style tails twisting around.

[39:08] Yes, that their tails are so incredibly flexible.

[39:11] Their tails are like ribbons, basically like their tails are ribbons or kimono sashes, whatever.

[39:15] And they all these dinosaurs want to do is caress.

[39:18] And it was like it went from being, oh, these dinosaurs show affection, I guess, to being like,

[39:23] oh, I'm trapped at a party and I'm sitting next to these two that cannot keep their hands on each

[39:28] other and are just kind of like caressing and kind of like kind of lightly touching each other.

[39:33] And even when the dinosaurs get stuck with a dart and their blood is being pumped out of them,

[39:37] they still do not notice because they're so hard for each other.

[39:40] Part of the thing.

[39:41] The titanosaurs cuddle puddle just can't.

[39:43] Well, they're so big.

[39:44] I assume that that dart is not much of a.

[39:47] I guess so.

[39:47] But this scene goes on for a very long time.

[39:50] Yeah.

[39:50] And this is after and Dr.

[39:52] Henry Loomis is like having this transcendent moment of ecstasy.

[39:56] Yeah, he's blasting.

[39:58] And it's like and I.

[40:00] I don't know if you guys had this thing and I was like, didn't you remember like a couple

[40:03] people died just like 50 minutes ago, 45 minutes ago?

[40:07] Like it seems like these characters have completely forgotten what they were just went through,

[40:11] you know, but maybe that's the experience of seeing two titanosaurs is necking or, you

[40:14] know, or they, they could make a moment of being like, wow, he's really into this even

[40:19] though our friends just died.

[40:21] But like, yeah, I don't know.

[40:22] So like highlight on it, like, you know what, this is this, even though that just happened,

[40:25] this is magical, you know, or they, you know, it, it brings me suddenly this is what life

[40:29] is all about.

[40:30] You know, it puts into contrast, you know, sharp contrast with doing or I don't know.

[40:34] It's, but it just seems like the movie was like, we don't care about those people.

[40:38] You don't care about those people.

[40:39] Let's move on to these.

[40:40] It's like that scene in the honey.

[40:41] I shrunk the kids where they're like, yeah, we're all super shrunk and it's terrifying.

[40:44] But look at how magical a giant ant is, right?

[40:48] Yeah.

[40:49] Yeah.

[40:50] I mean, nobody has died by that point in honey, I shrunk the kids.

[40:54] It'd be different if one of the kids died in that point.

[40:56] If like one of the kids or any boy, if one of the kids drowns in a puddle and they're

[41:02] like, oh shit.

[41:03] And then they see a giant ant and they're like, cool.

[41:07] Oh shit.

[41:08] Then the movie is called honey.

[41:10] I killed the kids.

[41:11] It'd be a different movie.

[41:12] Yeah.

[41:13] Hard to come back from that.

[41:14] Um, so you can see, I mean, even honey, I shrunk the kids is hard to come back from.

[41:18] Have you seen honey?

[41:19] I blew up the kids.

[41:20] Yeah.

[41:21] So they got still make honey.

[41:22] I blew up the kid, but it'd be a little bit different.

[41:25] Two out of three of the giant dinos have, uh, we've got their DNA.

[41:29] We did it.

[41:30] Uh, one left.

[41:31] They're going to have to climb this cliff for that.

[41:32] Again, only one of these dinos is an actual dino.

[41:34] The other two are just prehistoric reptiles.

[41:37] Meanwhile, the Delgados find a raft, which they start taking down river, uh, after the,

[41:42] after Bella shoes off her baby dino Dolores, uh, they narrowly escape a T-Rex along the

[41:48] way.

[41:49] What'd you guys think about this?

[41:50] Yeah.

[41:51] This is one of the better sequences.

[41:52] There are a few sequences.

[41:53] The lead up was good.

[41:55] I think that ties into one of the, the weirder things, uh, the, the way that we, you know,

[42:01] we have been, we were introduced as a culture to T-Rexes by that sequence in the first Jurassic

[42:07] Park where Justin's footsteps caused ripples.

[42:09] I'm going to nitpick slightly that Tyrannosaurus Rex was already a part of, people knew about

[42:14] it.

[42:15] If you know.

[42:16] No, I don't think so.

[42:17] It's not even the first movie with an iconic Tyrannosaurus Rex in it.

[42:19] It's really in film, I feel like, and is that moment where just its footsteps are causing

[42:26] ripples.

[42:27] Yes.

[42:28] And so ever since then, they're like, instead, they are the stealthiest creature in the universe.

[42:32] I mean, even by the end of that movie, as we all know, the dinosaurs manages to sneak

[42:36] up behind them at the end, but, and eat that rabbit, but you're right, that there's a,

[42:40] the Tyrannosaurus that I, even with the Titanosaurs, they're like, yeah, we're going over a hill,

[42:45] da da da.

[42:47] head lifts up and they're like, we had no idea that these huge dinosaurs are here.

[42:51] And like, it's a movie, whatever, but in real life you would hear them.

[42:54] You would smell them like you'd feel the tremors in the ground, like the sauropods in particular,

[42:59] they were probably farting all the time because they had huge guts where things would just

[43:03] ferment for forever and break down.

[43:06] But like that, but you're right, the Tyrannosaurus literally, it's like, I mean, the fact that

[43:10] it's napping, so they don't see it at first because it's napping, but like it can move

[43:13] so stealthily in this movie.

[43:15] It's true.

[43:16] But I will say there's something about, maybe it's the fact, I like the sequence and I think

[43:19] it's done, I think it's staged really in a fun way, but also you can't deny it, Tyrannosaurus

[43:24] is a super charismatic dinosaur in the way that like the new dinosaurs, they just don't

[43:29] got it in the same way you see Tyrannosaurus, you're like, oh shit, that's a movie star

[43:34] dinosaur.

[43:35] Like, even though he's only in the one scene, you're like, oh, they're like, oh, they brought

[43:37] in the big guns for this guy.

[43:39] And he's like treated like a, like a giant animal, whereas some of the other ones are

[43:43] treated like, oh, this is a crafty villain.

[43:46] Yes.

[43:47] Especially by the end when there's a, there's that dinosaur that I think is just like a,

[43:51] or that pterosaur, that's a made up kind of like weird dinosaur pterosaur hybrid.

[43:55] The other characters describe as being a mutant as shit, I believe.

[44:00] Yes, exactly.

[44:01] And that one is like, it's like, will not give up stalking them even when it has to

[44:05] squeeze into tunnels to get after them.

[44:06] It's like, no, it's not going to do this.

[44:08] Come on guys.

[44:09] Like, whereas you're right.

[44:10] The pterosaur has more kind of animal behavior in it, which I think is more fun, but let's

[44:16] return to our, you never, you never see it with its crush.

[44:19] Just kind of just nuzzling for a hundred hours.

[44:23] The others are repelling down this cliff to get a sample from an egg, from a nest in like

[44:28] an ancient temple on the side of the cliff.

[44:31] This was a funny addition that there's just an ancient Indiana Jones style temple.

[44:34] Yeah.

[44:35] They don't really get into it.

[44:37] But mama bird comes back home and kills the last remaining extraneous character during

[44:41] the scene.

[44:42] And in my opinion, like you were talking about, you liked that last sequence.

[44:45] This is my favorite sequence of the movie because it had a bit of that, like, you know,

[44:50] I keep bringing Spielberg up because of the original Jurassic Park, but it had a bit of

[44:53] that Spielberg thing where like multiple things are going on within the scene because they're

[44:59] all on ropes.

[45:00] So like when one of them gets knocked down, like someone gets pulled over somewhere else

[45:05] and there's also trying to get the genetic material, which is about to fall off the cliff.

[45:11] So they have to try and get that while being like whipped around and I found that a lot

[45:16] more fun.

[45:17] I was a little disappointed they didn't do something because at one point the pterosaur

[45:21] like swallows a guy that has a rope attached to him.

[45:24] And I was hoping that the fact that it now has this rope hanging out of its mouth would

[45:29] be some element in the, but it doesn't really.

[45:32] I thought the same thing.

[45:33] I was like, oh, now they're trying to get away from it, but it is literally attached

[45:37] to them.

[45:38] So they can't, you know, but it's, they didn't do anything with it.

[45:39] That would have been cool.

[45:40] But I think you're right, Dan, that, oh, this one has more of that feel of like, there's

[45:44] something going on over here.

[45:45] There's something going on over here.

[45:46] There's different elements that are interacting.

[45:47] And they affect each other.

[45:48] Yeah.

[45:49] Yeah.

[45:50] Like, like Indiana Jones with the truck or something like that or, or, or rather Indiana

[45:53] Jones punching that, fighting that big Nazi while the plane is kind of turning around

[45:57] because Marion's inside of it.

[45:58] That kind of thing.

[45:59] Yeah.

[46:00] That's one of the best action scenes of all time.

[46:04] If you went really hard, it's kind of, I mean, in the same general mechanics and principles,

[46:09] I guess, um, Jonathan, uh, Bailey falls off the cliff, but his fall is broken by branches

[46:15] and water.

[46:16] So it was hard to believe.

[46:18] We don't have to guys don't, don't worry.

[46:20] We don't have to name a new people's sexiest man alive.

[46:22] He can still, uh, take, serve.

[46:24] Is Donald Pleasant still alive?

[46:26] No, unfortunately he is not even injured.

[46:30] By this incredible fall, which I found unbelievable.

[46:34] And this is a movie that asked me to, to believe that there are mutant dinosaurs roaming around

[46:38] in an Island that also has a gas station with a working radio or at least sound system,

[46:43] you know?

[46:44] Um, but the Delgados, uh, they make it to the facility, the engine facility where they

[46:48] meet, uh, the team of mercenaries.

[46:51] And Teresa of course tells everyone, Hey, this dude is bad, evil, evil farmer man is

[46:55] evil and, uh, left her to die.

[46:58] The other thing is I'm like, these mercenaries wouldn't, they shouldn't on some level, they

[47:04] shouldn't be expected to care because like they took this fucking suicide mission for

[47:09] a lot of money just for the money.

[47:11] Yeah.

[47:12] So it should be a surprise that they care.

[47:14] I feel like, I don't know.

[47:15] Or I mean, there's a version of this where, yeah, we're at that moment is it is a surprise

[47:20] even to them that they care or it's a surprise to the bad guy that they can't like something

[47:24] out there.

[47:25] So there's a, you know what, what I, I, I don't necessarily believe that every story

[47:28] needs like a clear character emotion arc, but for this movie, I think it would make

[47:32] it stronger if any of the characters had any sort of clear emotional arc and one of I'm

[47:37] taking this mission.

[47:38] I'm so hard, but I'm so hardened by my life as a mercenary.

[47:42] I don't give a shit about anything.

[47:43] And all I care about is the money and then you go on this mission and there's innocent

[47:46] people and you're like, I can't believe I got to deal with these fucking people this

[47:49] whole time.

[47:50] Like this is such a, this is getting in my way.

[47:52] And then by the end of it, you're like, no, actually it's more important to me to protect

[47:55] these people than it is to fulfill this contract.

[47:57] Like that's an arc at least, but that might be a harder buy for Scarlett Johansson to

[48:01] then be the star of your movie to play a character who's an asshole for two thirds of the film.

[48:06] You know, I don't know.

[48:07] Who's saying she was a huge asshole in a marriage story though, right, Dan?

[48:10] I still haven't seen that movie.

[48:12] Dan, you were saying you're, you're, you were saying, why did that, why did the movie keep

[48:15] taking the villain's point of view?

[48:18] That's a great movie.

[48:19] Marriage story.

[48:20] I think it's really great.

[48:22] I remember when I myself was getting divorced.

[48:23] So I'm like, I'll skip this for now.

[48:24] And then I never circled back.

[48:25] That makes sense.

[48:26] Um, anyway, uh, Pharma, Pharma guy, Rupert Friend, he, that's why I missed the earlier

[48:33] Jurassic worlds.

[48:34] Cause I was planning trips to Jurassic world and I didn't want to get hooked over by dinos.

[48:38] There's a dino infestation at Hinterlands and you're like, I can't see too much.

[48:42] I'm just shitting dinos at this point.

[48:44] That's why the museum shut down because you canceled your membership.

[48:47] Yeah.

[48:48] Um, he, but uh, Rupert Friend has a gun.

[48:50] He handcuffs all the, hold on, let me just, was that supposed to be the museum of natural

[48:55] history in New York?

[48:56] They have more things there than just dinosaurs.

[48:59] You know?

[49:01] Yeah.

[49:02] No, that's not, no, that's the metropolitan museum.

[49:05] There's nothing like that.

[49:06] So you gotta stop taking your understanding from the night at the museum movie, which

[49:09] is not accurate to the museum of natural history.

[49:11] Um, is so unimportant at this point, but just because it comes up later, Rupert Friend handcuffs

[49:17] all the genetic stuff to his wrist.

[49:20] So he's got the suitcase and he has a gun and he's being mean to them.

[49:24] I've seen enough movies like this to know that arm ain't staying attached to his bizotti.

[49:29] Bizotti.

[49:30] Yeah.

[49:31] I could go for a bizotti right now.

[49:35] Mama Mia.

[49:36] Um, yeah.

[49:37] Like Mondo bread.

[49:38] It's more kind of like a Jewish bizotti.

[49:41] The power sort of like, uh, the generator like comes on the facility and stand by me

[49:46] starts playing, which I kind of liked as like a little like creepy moment of like the,

[49:52] like suddenly there's music here, but they don't linger on it.

[49:54] They don't like allow any creepiness to build.

[49:56] Like immediately dinosaurs just like should have been, should have been.

[50:00] Walk the dinosaur, right?

[50:01] Yeah.

[50:02] Open the door.

[50:03] Because it's always literally saying open the door, but they don't want to open the

[50:07] door because there's a fucking dinosaur out there.

[50:08] No, and they don't want to get on the floor either.

[50:09] Yeah.

[50:10] No.

[50:11] Or something by T-Rex, you know.

[50:14] They hide in various buildings.

[50:15] Dolores the baby dinosaur shows up again just as the Delgados hide from, I guess, modified

[50:20] raptors and they escape through a drainage pipe.

[50:24] Looking at the Wikipedia, it describes this as a mutodon, a hybrid raptor, pterosaur.

[50:30] Thank you.

[50:31] So now.

[50:32] How do you feel about these mutodons, Elliot?

[50:33] How do you feel about them?

[50:34] What do they make you feel?

[50:36] To be honest, I mean, this was where I was having trouble.

[50:40] The first two words should be I feel.

[50:42] Thank you.

[50:43] Well, that's what I said.

[50:44] I feel.

[50:45] Thanks.

[50:46] Thank you for giving me the prompt.

[50:47] Watching the movie, I was torn because I was like, I love monsters.

[50:50] I love any kind of crazy monster.

[50:52] I like seeing movies where monsters are chasing people.

[50:55] But at a certain point, these characters just become dragons like they have modified them

[50:59] so much that it's just dragons chasing them.

[51:01] And there was so there was still part of me that was like, I wanted dinosaurs in my dinosaur

[51:05] movie.

[51:06] I don't want dragons in my dinosaur movie.

[51:07] And so maybe that's unfair and kind of like, I feel like you're still a monster if you're

[51:11] going to mutate them.

[51:12] They got to be way weirder.

[51:13] They need like, I don't know, faces and I don't know because they try that with the

[51:18] distorted Rex where it's like a weird thing.

[51:20] And even that at a certain point, then it's like, well, now it feels like there's an alien

[51:23] after these people.

[51:25] And I feel like if you're trying to tell me dinosaurs are cool, then give me cool dinosaurs

[51:29] doing cool stuff as opposed to like, we got to make a new thing.

[51:32] Like, it's the same way that like if you were going to make a movie about George Washington,

[51:36] you weren't going to be like, you know what, let's make let's make it so that he can fly

[51:40] or even that.

[51:41] I'm with you, dude.

[51:42] But what we're already dealing with your issue is just that they have mutants at all.

[51:46] I'm saying if you're like, it's already built, baked in that we have mutants.

[51:51] I'm saying make them fucking go all the way.

[51:53] But it's like I was watching the Guillermo del Toro, Frankenstein, and there was a lot

[51:57] of stuff in it that I liked.

[51:58] But there are times when Frankenstein is just throwing people around where I'm like, well,

[52:01] this is like a superhero movie right now.

[52:03] And it's not what I want.

[52:04] A gothic romance, not necessarily superhero action.

[52:07] Yeah.

[52:08] Yeah.

[52:09] The moments where he's like, he's just misunderstood.

[52:10] I'm like, he blasted that dude to fucking hell with one punch.

[52:15] I think at this point, you're like, I mean, by that point, you've been pretty mistreated

[52:19] by the world.

[52:20] There's a couple of points where he says he's just fighting people and he's all he has to

[52:23] do is go, hey, stop, because he doesn't look that weird.

[52:26] He's just at by the end of it when he's got long hair.

[52:29] He's just a big scarred up guy.

[52:30] So he can just go, hey, wait, don't shoot me.

[52:33] Yeah.

[52:34] Yeah.

[52:35] I'm sure that he's new.

[52:36] He's super hot.

[52:37] If you go to Tumblr, there's got to be like so much horny Frankenstein stuff already.

[52:42] I'm just saying, like, sure, this dude shows up and immediately punches guys heads off

[52:46] and the captain's like, oh, no, I'll hear him out.

[52:49] That's fine.

[52:50] You know what?

[52:51] He's got a good story.

[52:52] He goes, they're like, we've got to kill the monster.

[52:55] He goes, look, I've been captaining the ship for so long.

[52:57] I'm so bored of you people.

[52:58] A new person just walked in with a story to tell.

[53:01] I want to hear it.

[53:02] I want to fucking spill the tea.

[53:04] Give me the gossip.

[53:06] So I so I was feel torn.

[53:08] I was torn because I like monsters, but I really want to dinosaurs.

[53:10] Stuart's saying, muting them up even more.

[53:12] Dan, what was your feeling about these kind of mutant dinosaurs?

[53:17] I mean, either of your ways would be better.

[53:20] Like, the problem is about Avatar over here.

[53:23] This is your way.

[53:24] This is the one.

[53:25] This is one of the few times where I'm like, no, don't take the middle path.

[53:29] Like, Dan's Dan's kind of like the Jake Sully of the podcast.

[53:35] Elliot is Spider, of course.

[53:39] What other characters are there?

[53:41] Like, young Gourney Weaver.

[53:42] I still haven't seen any of those movies.

[53:43] I don't know any.

[53:44] I know Jake Sully is.

[53:45] But every time I think I might have told the story before.

[53:46] Every time I tried to see the original Avatar in the theaters, someone in my family either

[53:47] had to go have surgery or died.

[53:48] And like, I tried to go the first time and my my uncle had a heart attack and I was like,

[53:49] all right, I have to go visit him in the hospital.

[53:50] And then I bought tickets to see it.

[53:51] And that day, my my fiancee, now wife's grandfather died.

[53:52] And she was like, Oh, my God.

[53:53] Oh, my God.

[53:54] Oh, my God.

[53:55] Oh, my God.

[53:56] Oh, my God.

[53:57] Oh, my God.

[53:58] I don't want to know what is the escalation from that is that does not love an avatar.

[54:27] I feel like I feel like a journey to the land of Pandora will kind of help you come

[54:33] to terms with your grief and the concept of somebody spirit kind of passing on to kind

[54:39] of join a collective.

[54:40] And I think you would actually really it would have really helped.

[54:43] I yeah.

[54:44] OK.

[54:45] Now I see what you're saying.

[54:46] So I should have seen Avatar no matter how many members of my family had to pay for it.

[54:48] But also, like, I would love it if like you just jump in now, you just go to see number

[54:53] three now without having seen the other ones.

[54:56] Just see what you think.

[54:57] It looks pretty intense.

[54:59] But let's get back to this movie where.

[55:01] Oh, right.

[55:02] Right.

[55:03] Jonathan Bailey.

[55:04] It's our world.

[55:05] Marshall Ali are in the lab we saw in the cold open.

[55:08] They find out there's a tunnel that leads to a boat.

[55:10] But before that, the helicopter arrives.

[55:12] They all run for it.

[55:13] But the giant mutant dino from the opening reappears.

[55:16] I do love the copter in midair.

[55:18] I do love this bit because these guys are like, oh, well, nobody's here.

[55:22] Let's go home to our families and be safe forever.

[55:26] Nope.

[55:27] Jonathan Bailey shot a flare.

[55:28] Let's go get eaten.

[55:30] Everyone escapes in the funnel of the funnel.

[55:32] The tunnel is kind of like a funnel in a way or a funnel is like a tunnel that just gets

[55:38] narrower.

[55:39] Yeah.

[55:40] Except for a pharma villain who abandons everyone, races for the boat in a jeep.

[55:45] They're stopped by a gate.

[55:46] But Isabella squeezes through to try and open it.

[55:48] Do you like the bit where this jeep keeps alerting him that there's pedestrians in the

[55:52] road and the pedestrians are these dinosaurs?

[55:55] I enjoyed that.

[55:56] I thought that was funny.

[55:57] Yeah.

[55:58] There's a pedestrian ahead of you.

[55:59] And it's the distorted.

[56:00] Yeah.

[56:01] Yeah.

[56:02] Xenomorph dino looks like it's going to eat them all.

[56:05] But this is let's describe it.

[56:07] It's like a xenomorph.

[56:08] It's like a rancor body shape.

[56:09] It's got big hands with arms.

[56:11] Yeah.

[56:12] But it also has two extra little arms.

[56:14] And it's got.

[56:15] I like it.

[56:16] I like that part.

[56:17] Like an alien bullet head.

[56:18] Yeah.

[56:19] The only thing is like tumor on its head or something.

[56:21] The only thing is, if you're going to go, you're going to start going a little bit wild

[56:24] with the design.

[56:25] You want a little more stuff there.

[56:28] So like if you're going to put an extra set of little arms, have those little arms doing

[56:32] weird shit.

[56:33] Yeah.

[56:34] Like have them doing stuff.

[56:35] It looks like the mutant dino might eat them all.

[56:38] But the pharma villain arrives just in time to be distraction and get eaten himself.

[56:42] But luckily his arm gets bitten off first so they can get the sample case.

[56:48] Ali uses a flare to distract the mutant dino to save the others swimming away underwater

[56:55] while they get in the boat.

[56:56] So he's briefly missing, presumed dino eaten, except immediately he reappears.

[57:01] He shows up with no explanation as to how he avoided the big bad worst dino monster

[57:07] of the movie.

[57:08] Yeah.

[57:09] Which was literally about to eat him.

[57:10] Moments away from eating him.

[57:11] Yeah.

[57:12] It's like yadda yadda yadda.

[57:13] You're not interested in the details of how this happened.

[57:15] You don't care.

[57:16] You just don't want to see Mahershala die.

[57:17] Yeah.

[57:18] We understand.

[57:19] We'll just have him get out of there, you know?

[57:20] Yeah.

[57:21] I mean, I feel like, do you think that like, how much better would you have liked it if

[57:25] it cut away and you assumed he was dead and then it cut back and he like does something

[57:29] awesome to get away?

[57:30] Like would you want to see him doing something awesome or is it better to imagine something

[57:34] awesome?

[57:35] Would I want him to see him do something awesome?

[57:36] Yeah.

[57:37] For sure.

[57:38] Yeah.

[57:39] 100%.

[57:40] What I don't want is like the movie to be like, uh oh, he's definitely going to die.

[57:44] And then with no explanation is like, no, no, he's a nice character.

[57:46] So of course we can't kill him.

[57:48] Here he is.

[57:49] Not since, not since Rise of Skywalker when Chewbacca gets into a spaceship, the spaceship

[57:53] explodes and they go, oh no, Chewbacca.

[57:56] And then the next scene is Chewbacca being led into a room as a prisoner.

[57:59] And they're like, aha, he's not dead.

[58:01] Like, yeah.

[58:02] All right.

[58:03] You're not going to.

[58:04] There's no suspense.

[58:05] There's you don't let us feel the emotion.

[58:06] There's no explanation.

[58:07] It doesn't matter.

[58:08] You know?

[58:09] Anyway, we're at the final scene.

[58:10] I will say, wait, I just, I'm just realizing this.

[58:12] If you were trying to make mutant dinosaurs and you're a, you're a heart, you're a heartless

[58:17] corporation.

[58:18] Yeah.

[58:19] New Damocle.

[58:20] You're a heartless corporation trying to make mutant dinosaurs.

[58:21] You have one that is too ugly and too disgusting to put in public display.

[58:26] Would you a kill that dinosaur or be too expensive?

[58:30] They say in the movie, they're like, they're like, it's too expensive to kill these dinosaurs.

[58:33] And it's like, I don't understand either way, either way, it's a loss on the books.

[58:38] So I don't understand why killing it, what keeping it alive means that you can write

[58:41] it off as being alive.

[58:42] Like, think about how much camp that thing probably eats a ton of stuff, right?

[58:47] Whereas if you kill it, you can eat it.

[58:48] Yeah.

[58:49] That's a good one.

[58:50] So it's actually a good point.

[58:51] Dan.

[58:52] Yeah.

[58:53] Anyway.

[58:54] So they're all boating away, including Babo, Babo, Baby Dino Dolores, Babo Dino and Scar

[59:02] Joe and Jay Bales decide to release Babo Dino is the kind of character you would see in

[59:07] like the American version of heavy metal where it's like a sexy dinosaur woman.

[59:12] Who like rides a motorcycle around in the future.

[59:15] Oh, man.

[59:16] But are like, oh, yeah, it's European.

[59:19] So it's actually really deep and important.

[59:21] It's actually really philosophical, even though it's mostly just this dinosaur woman killing

[59:24] guys and having sex with them.

[59:26] Our leads decide to release.

[59:28] Yeah.

[59:29] They decide to release the medical medical info open source rather than getting their

[59:34] huge open source.

[59:35] They open the source.

[59:36] They open up the source.

[59:37] And that's a dinosaur with with us.

[59:38] We tried to breed.

[59:39] We tried to breed a thesaurus.

[59:40] We tried to made a dictionary with the Tyrannosaurus Rex.

[59:41] It's full of words that mean the same thing.

[59:42] Anyway, the nightmare is over.

[59:43] They cut it open.

[59:44] All the words come spilling out.

[59:45] Yeah.

[59:46] Oh, there's no loops.

[59:47] I didn't even check if there are any.

[59:48] Yeah, I checked.

[59:49] Is there a loop?

[59:50] Is there a loop?

[59:51] Yeah.

[59:52] Yeah.

[59:53] Yeah.

[59:54] Yeah.

[59:55] Yeah.

[59:56] Yeah.

[59:57] Yeah.

[59:58] Yeah.

[59:59] Yeah.

[1:00:00] Yeah.

[1:00:01] Yeah.

[1:00:02] Yeah.

[1:00:00] mid-credits scene? No, I'm including that under the umbrella of Bloops. Bloops has expanded in

[1:00:07] its meaning. I don't like this. That's like calling a marine reptile a dinosaur. I don't

[1:00:11] like this. Yeah. So, Jurassic Park Rebirth, Jurassic World, rather. I kept calling it

[1:00:19] Jurassic Park Rebirth and not Jurassic World. And it just shows what the, to me at least,

[1:00:23] in my mind, being a kid in 1983, what a huge cultural impact Jurassic Park had on me and

[1:00:29] how relatively minor Jurassic World won. That even though this movie is called Jurassic World Rebirth,

[1:00:34] in my head and in my conversations with people, I keep referring to it as Jurassic Park

[1:00:38] Rebirth. Like, it's just, that's what I think of it as, you know? Yeah, certainly. Well,

[1:00:44] our final judgments on Jurassic World Rebirth, which I see now, I'm like looking, I'm looking

[1:00:51] ahead at my like letters question email. I emailed myself and it says letters cues for JPR. I didn't

[1:00:59] even put JWR. Yeah. Anyway, so our final judgments, is this a good, bad movie, a bad, bad movie,

[1:01:07] or a movie kind of like, it's a bad, bad movie. I got really kind of angry at this movie. Not

[1:01:14] because it's like the worst made thing in the world, but just because it's like,

[1:01:18] it felt like the most bankrupt thing. Like, you just, there is no clear reason why this was made

[1:01:24] and thus it was boring to watch. That's my review. Stuart? Yeah, I mean, guys, why is it so hard to

[1:01:32] make a fucking movie with dinosaurs, apparently? Like, it should be super cool and exciting. As a

[1:01:38] kid, there's nothing in my life that I was more interested in than dinosaurs. So you should be

[1:01:43] able to easily put dinosaurs in a movie and make it super exciting. But for some reason, it's

[1:01:48] impossible. I think maybe that's the hard part is that dinosaurs are instantly so much more

[1:01:54] interesting than anything that the human characters can be doing most of the time. And I think that

[1:01:59] the first Jurassic Park, one of the things that's so great about it is that all those characters

[1:02:04] are, what you're doing is you are experiencing through them the wonder and the excitement of

[1:02:08] seeing a dinosaur for the first time. And now that that, the seal is off that you can never do

[1:02:13] that again. And they, when they try to do it here, it feels like, yeah, yeah, we saw this happen at

[1:02:17] Jurassic Park. But it means that you've got to figure out how to make those characters as

[1:02:20] interesting as, or as compelling as the dinosaurs, which is really hard to do, which is just tough to

[1:02:25] do. But this is, I'm going to call it bad, bad just because of our categories. It's like,

[1:02:29] but this movie is fine. It's not a terrible movie. It's just like, it's hard to make the,

[1:02:35] what is this, like the seventh movie in the series or something? It's hard to the seventh

[1:02:39] movie in a series when the first movie is great. It's hard. It's just, it feels, there's, I think

[1:02:45] the people who made it. Do you have any affection for any of the others? Not really. I mean,

[1:02:49] Jurassic Park 3 is kind of fun. Yeah. And the sequence in Jurassic Park 2 where the Tyrannosaurus

[1:02:53] is loose in California or whatever, it's kind of, it's kind of fun. Well, also the, the, what do you

[1:02:57] call it? The trailers over the cliff in Lost World is also a great sequence. Yeah, that's fun too.

[1:03:03] But I think that the, it's, it's just so hard to match that original movie, but also like we were

[1:03:09] saying, everyone who's making this movie has done great work before. There's no one, this is not one

[1:03:13] of those times where someone who is, who shouldn't be doing this movie is, is doing it. And I think

[1:03:18] you just have to ask yourself kind of like, yeah, why? I think the question that was never fully

[1:03:22] asked was why are we doing this movie? Like what, what makes it special again? And I think, or maybe

[1:03:28] they asked that question and they just didn't hit on quite the right answer for it. I don't know,

[1:03:31] but that's to make a Jurassic, to make a dinosaur movie, you got to figure out what makes this

[1:03:35] special now because we've got so many of them. And it's the same thing that's affecting, I feel like,

[1:03:39] superhero movies where you got to be like, well, why does this superhero story have to be told

[1:03:44] other than we're just making more superhero stuff? And it's been, it's harder and harder

[1:03:47] for them to answer that question. Well, that's what Soupy Sales was, was eating a radioactive

[1:03:52] bowl of soup and became a superhero. He has the power of soup. Yeah. I'm calling it bad bad,

[1:03:58] but it's fine. Why was it called Soupy Sales? I think it's just a silly name. Oh, okay.

[1:04:05] That's an answer. Sure. I wish there was more to it than that. Yeah.

[1:04:15] Good evening. Thanks for tuning in to 101.1 Max Fun. It's midnight here on Host to Coast and

[1:04:22] we've got Sarah from Michigan on line one. Hi, I'm calling in for some help. I used to love

[1:04:27] reading, but between grad school, having kids and the general state of the world, I can't seem to

[1:04:32] pick up a book and stick with it anymore. Sarah, this is an easy one. Just listen to Reading Glasses,

[1:04:38] a podcast designed to help you read better. Bria and Mallory will get all the pressure,

[1:04:42] shame and guilt out of your reading life. You'll be finishing books you love in no time. Great.

[1:04:46] That sounds amazing. Also, I do think my husband is cheating on me with Mothman. Can you help me

[1:04:50] with that one? Oh, I don't think they cover that. Reading Glasses every Thursday on Maximum Fun.

[1:04:59] Hey, do you have a favorite episode of Star Trek? If you do, you should also have a favorite Star

[1:05:05] Trek podcast. Greatest Trek is about all the new streaming Star Trek shows, and it's a great

[1:05:09] companion to The Greatest Generation, our hit show about back catalog Star Trek that you grew up with.

[1:05:15] It's a comedy podcast by two folks who used to be video producers, so it's a serious mix

[1:05:20] of comedy and insight that fits right into the Maximum Fun network of shows.

[1:05:24] And Greatest Trek is one of the most popular Star Trek podcasts in the world.

[1:05:28] So if you're following Lower Decks, Prodigy or Strange New Worlds,

[1:05:32] come hang out with us every Friday as we roast and review our favorite Star Trek shows.

[1:05:37] It's on MaximumFun.org, YouTube or your podcatching app.

[1:05:42] Um, let's do some plugs. Elliot, I believe there's some plugs for us.

[1:05:48] The Flophouse that you are in charge of. We have some plugs, and I don't just mean

[1:05:54] hair plugs from my rapidly balding head. We have some Flophouse stuff that we're going to do.

[1:05:58] Should I get hair plugs right into the Flophouse? Let me know. As always, Flop TV continues. It's

[1:06:04] the first Saturday of every month, September through February. When this episode drops,

[1:06:10] I believe we will be doing our Flop TV episode tonight on Saturday, January 3rd for Dr. Dolittle,

[1:06:18] the 1960s version, because this is Flopsterpiece Theater.

[1:06:21] This season we are going back in time. We started with the 2000s with The Adventures of Pluto and

[1:06:26] Ash, and we've been going decade by decade. December, last month, we did Zardoz, a movie

[1:06:31] that I think I love after watching it again. But now we're doing Dr. Dolittle, a movie that I

[1:06:37] barely tolerated. And so we'll be talking about that tonight, January 3rd on Flop TV.

[1:06:43] Go to theflophouse.simpletix.com for anyone who hasn't heard these ads or seen Flop TV.

[1:06:47] Flop TV is the one-hour TV version of the Flophouse. You get us talking about a movie,

[1:06:51] but you also get a presentation. You get a video segment. You get an opening video.

[1:06:56] You get actual produced elements, and we answer questions from the viewers at the end of the show.

[1:07:03] They're super fun. I love doing them. Everyone always has a good time.

[1:07:06] So that's theflophouse.simpletix.com. If you missed the season up till now, that's okay.

[1:07:13] If you buy tickets to those episodes, you get access to the recordings,

[1:07:16] which will stay online and available through the end of February.

[1:07:19] Because in January, it's Dr. Dolittle, and in February, it is Plan 9 from Outer Space,

[1:07:24] a movie we have never covered, even though it's maybe the most famous bad movie that there ever

[1:07:27] was. So that's Flop TV, theflophouse.simpletix.com. Let's say you want to see us in person.

[1:07:34] You got one opportunity if you can get yourself to San Francisco on January 25th.

[1:07:40] As Arnold Schwarzenegger says, get to the chopper, and by chopper, I mean San Francisco Sketch Fest.

[1:07:45] We will be appearing. You've heard of the San Francisco treat. In this case,

[1:07:48] we are the treat in San Francisco. Yes. It's Sunday, January 25th in the afternoon,

[1:07:54] 4 p.m. at Cobb's Comedy Club. We are going to be talking about the movie Master of Disguise,

[1:07:59] right? Starring Dana Harvey. Right. Elliot says, with trepidation. With trepidation,

[1:08:04] am I getting it wrong? This is one of the movies we have been asked about the most,

[1:08:09] of all the movies, to do on the show. So we'll be talking about it Sunday, January 25th,

[1:08:14] 2026, 4 p.m. at Cobb's Comedy Club as part of San Francisco Sketch Fest. We had such a great time

[1:08:19] last year at San Francisco Sketch Fest. We're so glad to be going there again. Go to sfsketchfest.com

[1:08:25] for our schedule and tickets. And that's sfsketchfest.com to buy tickets to see us

[1:08:31] January 25th at Cobb's Comedy Club. And let's say that's not even enough flophouse for you.

[1:08:36] Let's say you wanted to read a whole chapter of a book about podcasting and the flophouse.

[1:08:42] Why? You could just pick up my book, Joke Farming, How to Write Comedy and Other Nonsense,

[1:08:46] by me, Elliot Kalin, from the University of Chicago Press. It's available in bookstores

[1:08:50] anywhere or buy it online. I prefer you to buy it through your independent bookstore.

[1:08:54] If you don't have an independent bookstore nearby, get it online, maybe from an independent bookstore.

[1:08:59] But that's Joke Farming. There's a whole chapter in there about podcasting where I talk about what

[1:09:02] I've learned about writing for a podcast or rather devising a podcast through the flophouse.

[1:09:10] And that's my book, Joke Farming, How to Write Comedy and Other Nonsense. Do you guys have any

[1:09:13] things you would like to plug? Flophouse or not flophouse related?

[1:09:17] No. Oh, so it's shaking his head, no.

[1:09:19] No, you know, we're just we're just hanging out, man.

[1:09:23] Sounds good. Just hanging out.

[1:09:26] Let's answer some letters from listeners. This first one is from Patrick, last name withheld,

[1:09:32] who writes, Hey, Peaches, your recent discussion of The Crow remake, a movie I've not seen,

[1:09:39] reminded me of my only experience of the 90s. The Crow, also a movie I've not seen.

[1:09:45] One of my roommates in college thought The Crow was the coolest movie ever made.

[1:09:49] He dressed as the titular crow for Halloween on more than one occasion.

[1:09:53] Listen to the soundtrack a lot, etc. His favorite line.

[1:09:58] I wonder what that etc is.

[1:10:00] What else can you do with the crow?

[1:10:04] He and his girlfriend were killed by bugs.

[1:10:07] But he came back.

[1:10:08] So he could watch the crow again.

[1:10:09] He played guitar on the roof in the rain.

[1:10:13] His favorite line from the movie was the crow's response to being told, move and you're dead,

[1:10:18] which is, you say move and I'm dead, but I say I'm dead and I move.

[1:10:24] I'll admit that at the time...

[1:10:26] That's deep.

[1:10:27] At the time I thought this line ruled, but he repeated it so often that it eventually

[1:10:31] lost its luster for me.

[1:10:33] This is the opposite experience I had with my college roommate, Brian Chan, who is still

[1:10:37] a dear friend.

[1:10:38] He liked to quote the least memorable lines from Star Wars.

[1:10:42] And so sometimes if he was done with his work or something and he was just relaxing, he'd

[1:10:46] go, oh, thank the maker.

[1:10:48] This oil bath is going to feel so good.

[1:10:50] I just loved that that was the line he quoted all the time.

[1:10:54] I still love it when he says it.

[1:10:55] Pretty great.

[1:10:56] He's using it as like a bunch of fucking words.

[1:10:59] You know, that's a good quote.

[1:11:02] So my question is, are there any lines from movies you thought were amazing the first

[1:11:06] time, but you but but lost their appeal over time?

[1:11:10] We can maybe call this the David Mamet effect because lines like everyone needs money.

[1:11:14] That's why they call it money.

[1:11:16] Sound cool, maybe when Danny DeVito says it, but end up sounding more confusing when repeated

[1:11:21] in real life.

[1:11:22] Honestly, even when I saw that, even when I saw that in the trailer for Heist, I was

[1:11:25] like, that doesn't make any sense.

[1:11:27] I mean, I think that has the rhythm of a cool line, but yeah, a lot of these are just naturally

[1:11:32] going to be stuff like over quoted shit like I don't know, like I mean, like obviously

[1:11:39] you got your Borat's and your Austin Powers, yeah, you're you're not you're you're the

[1:11:43] man now, dog.

[1:11:44] That sort of thing.

[1:11:45] I mean, I mean, I thought those were both funny at the time, but we're not like my favorites.

[1:11:51] But like also like Holy Grail, for instance, was a favorite of mine, so it was ruined by

[1:11:57] decades.

[1:11:58] It hurts.

[1:11:59] If Borat was one of your favorites, that would be such a change in how I perceive that.

[1:12:05] I mean, I have to say, like there was a moment when and maybe maybe this is maybe this is

[1:12:09] not acceptable.

[1:12:10] I don't know.

[1:12:11] I remember seeing Borat in the theaters for the first time and it was one of the funniest

[1:12:14] experiences I've had in terms of seeing a movie live with an audience.

[1:12:17] And I was like, this is the cutting edge of comedy right now.

[1:12:19] And to see that so quickly go from the cutting edge to this again, OK, more of this was a

[1:12:25] dispiriting thing.

[1:12:26] I mean, Austin Powers is kind of seeing that and being like, oh, this feels like a new

[1:12:29] thing.

[1:12:30] Like this is a new fun thing.

[1:12:31] And it so quickly became like more of this.

[1:12:33] I can't take it.

[1:12:34] Yeah.

[1:12:35] But what's what's a quote that you guys thought was cool or meant something to you?

[1:12:38] And then it stopped meaning things to you.

[1:12:40] You know.

[1:12:41] Well, that's a harder question to answer, which is why I didn't probably something from

[1:12:44] fucking Fight Club or something.

[1:12:46] Yeah.

[1:12:47] Yeah.

[1:12:48] I mean, like there's a lot of quotes out there for like something from American Beauty stuff

[1:12:52] I liked.

[1:12:53] But then the wrong people jumped on the train, you know, like Fight Club or, you know, like

[1:12:59] the big Lebowski.

[1:13:00] I don't know.

[1:13:02] I dare say there's a line that that Joseph Cotton has in Shadow of a Doubt that I used

[1:13:07] to love because it was such a I was like, this is the darkest thing I can imagine from

[1:13:11] an old movie where he talks about he's talking to his niece, young Charlie, who is learning

[1:13:16] that he is a serial killer.

[1:13:17] It's a great movie.

[1:13:18] I highly recommend it.

[1:13:19] He goes, says something about like those.

[1:13:22] What do you know about the world?

[1:13:23] You know, if you tear the if you rip the fronts off houses, you'd find swine inside the world's

[1:13:27] a hell.

[1:13:28] What does it matter what happens in it?

[1:13:29] And I remember being like, what?

[1:13:31] Like I don't agree with that.

[1:13:32] Like, what a cool, like kind of harsh thing for a character to say, especially in an old

[1:13:35] movie and the older I get, the more I'm like, I like I don't I'm not as attracted to darkness

[1:13:40] as I once was.

[1:13:41] And so maybe that's something that I don't find as cool as I was.

[1:13:43] I still think it's a great line for that character, but I'm no longer like what a what

[1:13:47] a cool, dark thing for a character to say, you know, yeah, this is a tough one because

[1:13:51] it requires me to both remember lines from movies and also remember once I don't like

[1:13:56] anymore.

[1:13:57] Do you have trouble remembering whether characters rip their own ding dongs off in movies?

[1:14:00] I think I think the record will show that I'm pretty good at that.

[1:14:05] And as we know, Dan is has Jackie Chan blindness and amnesia is unable to remember of Jackie

[1:14:10] Janice in movies.

[1:14:12] I mean, he's not that noticeable of a presence in most movies.

[1:14:15] That's true.

[1:14:16] Fades into the background.

[1:14:17] Wallflower.

[1:14:19] This next letter is from Helen Mary.

[1:14:21] Wallflower sounds like a good Jackie Chan movie title.

[1:14:24] Yeah, well, he a young Jackie Chan.

[1:14:26] OK, this is he's like where he's like a nerd.

[1:14:28] Right. But nobody knows that he's a he's a martial arts master, you know?

[1:14:32] Yes. Perfect.

[1:14:33] Helen Mary, last name withheld.

[1:14:34] Right. You may not be interested in more Patch Adams stories.

[1:14:39] Cool. Don't tell us.

[1:14:40] Just kidding. I would love to hear it.

[1:14:41] I'm compelled to share this regardless.

[1:14:44] Here's here is something I will never say ever.

[1:14:46] This is a combination of words in the English language I will never utter.

[1:14:50] I am tired of Patch Adams stories.

[1:14:53] Never. The only story of Patch Adams I'm tired of is the movie Patch Adams.

[1:14:57] Otherwise, I want to hear them all.

[1:14:59] I mean, as long as they're true.

[1:15:00] Don't don't start lying to us about that.

[1:15:03] I don't need the Chuck Tangle Patch Adams story where it's where it's obviously made

[1:15:06] up. Yeah.

[1:15:07] Anyway, a few years back, I was working in the Midwestern town where Patch lives.

[1:15:11] Central Illinois is a good place to find pawpaws, the native fruit that's sort of

[1:15:15] like if a mango and an overripe banana had a baby and a friend organized

[1:15:20] a bike ride to go visit and harvest the pawpaw trees around town.

[1:15:25] Halfway through the tour, our leader stopped to warn us that the next stop would be

[1:15:29] a little unusual.

[1:15:32] We rolled up a long gravel driveway leading to a house, some outbuildings and a

[1:15:36] pawpaw tree.

[1:15:37] Suddenly, the door to the house flew open and outran a man entirely naked except for

[1:15:42] a diaper with his belly and chest painted blue.

[1:15:45] He threw himself to the ground by the pawpaw tree.

[1:15:48] We had entered the movie Krippendorf's tribe by accident.

[1:15:51] He threw himself to the ground by the pawpaw tree and wailed, Papa, Papa, don't

[1:15:56] take my pawpaw away from me.

[1:15:58] I have never seen the movie.

[1:15:59] Patch Adams did not realize it was based on a real person and don't think I would

[1:16:03] recognize them with clothes on.

[1:16:05] Your pal, Helen Mary, last year.

[1:16:09] So that was Patch Adams who was doing that?

[1:16:11] Yep, that's our old friend Patch Adams.

[1:16:13] So I'm actually...

[1:16:14] Weirder and weirder with every story.

[1:16:15] This raises a lot more questions because did the rest of the group like break into laughter

[1:16:21] at that?

[1:16:22] Were they like going insane?

[1:16:23] Yeah, was that supposed to be the...

[1:16:26] The joke of it was the play on words or the, yeah.

[1:16:29] I guess so.

[1:16:30] I mean, also like you say...

[1:16:31] They all laughed and then he went, you're cured.

[1:16:34] Take them away.

[1:16:35] Papa, Papa.

[1:16:37] So that explains the diaper, but why is he blue too?

[1:16:41] Because he's sad that he's losing his pawpaws.

[1:16:42] Oh, okay.

[1:16:43] Exactly, yeah.

[1:16:44] He's blue.

[1:16:45] WD.

[1:16:46] WD.

[1:16:47] That's what the song was about, actually, if you listen to the lyrics.

[1:16:48] Well, I guess it all fits together.

[1:16:52] Now what do we do on this podcast, Danny boy?

[1:16:56] Now is when we...

[1:16:57] I just want to say again, everyone, if you have a Patch Adams story, you need to send

[1:17:00] it in.

[1:17:01] Thank you.

[1:17:02] We're collecting them for the Patch Adams Oral History Project.

[1:17:04] It's NPR and StoryCorps and we'll be collecting them all, I assume, into a leather bound volume,

[1:17:10] which will then be jettisoned into the sun.

[1:17:13] Now is when we recommend movies that we think might be a better use of your time than the

[1:17:19] one we watched.

[1:17:21] I'm looking through my recently watched films and a lot of them are things that have been

[1:17:27] recommended before by Elliot.

[1:17:31] So I won't recommend those ones.

[1:17:33] Wow.

[1:17:34] That's Dan's low key way of telling Elliot that he respects his recommendations.

[1:17:36] Yeah.

[1:17:37] Well, I mean, I watched Night of the...

[1:17:38] But in a backhanded way.

[1:17:39] Night of the Juggler and Million Dollar Legs, and I liked both of them, but I think they've

[1:17:44] been talked about already.

[1:17:45] So...

[1:17:46] They've been recommended before.

[1:17:47] If we have...

[1:17:48] I mean, I don't know if I've ever recommended Million Dollar Legs on the show, have I?

[1:17:51] It's possible not.

[1:17:52] It's possible.

[1:17:53] Check the tape.

[1:17:55] You did a screening back in the 92 wide Tribeca days, but that's...

[1:18:00] That is one of the...

[1:18:01] I find it to be such a funny movie.

[1:18:02] It's one of those 30s comedies where they're just like, whatever.

[1:18:05] We can do whatever.

[1:18:06] Who cares?

[1:18:07] And it's just super silly and it kind of hells a pop and throw everything in way.

[1:18:11] Yeah.

[1:18:12] So I'm going to recommend Wake Up Dead Man, which I went out and saw in the theaters despite

[1:18:19] Netflix's best efforts to say, don't do that anymore.

[1:18:23] And I'm like, fuck you.

[1:18:25] I will.

[1:18:26] Fuck you, Netflix.

[1:18:27] I'm going to give you more money in a different way and you're not going to like it.

[1:18:30] I mean, if I want to change Netflix's mind about the theatrical experience, it's probably

[1:18:34] the best way of doing it.

[1:18:35] That's a very good point, actually.

[1:18:37] Yeah.

[1:18:38] But, you know, I like these Benoit Blanc mysteries.

[1:18:42] You feel like definitely like kind of the target audience.

[1:18:45] You have a cast of great character actors and it's like a little bit of a whodunit,

[1:18:49] a little bit of a character thing.

[1:18:51] I've got a wife who will watch any whodunit.

[1:18:54] I'm I'm also a fan.

[1:18:58] Yeah, I mean, like, you know, it's it's it's comedy.

[1:19:01] It's mystery.

[1:19:03] Each of these films feels like it, you know, is trying to address larger themes.

[1:19:09] This one is a little less of an ensemble piece, a little more focused on Joshua Connors

[1:19:14] character, but he is fantastic in it.

[1:19:17] Always. And yeah, I just had a great time.

[1:19:21] Like this is a classic, like the best special effect is a bunch of actors doing stuff with

[1:19:27] a fun script movie.

[1:19:28] Do you think do you think Josh O'Connor and Daniel Craig talked about working with

[1:19:33] Luca Guadagnino a bunch because they were both in Luca movies last year?

[1:19:37] Probably.

[1:19:38] Yeah, probably.

[1:19:40] I don't see why they wouldn't.

[1:19:41] Yeah.

[1:19:43] Man, I have I've been watching a pile of movies, but I think I'm going to recommend

[1:19:48] one that's close to my heart movies in a pile.

[1:19:52] That's not the best. Yeah, I'm going to recommend one that's close to my heart because I

[1:19:55] went and saw with a good buddy of mine.

[1:19:57] That's right. That is now.

[1:20:00] Three Me, aka Now You See Me, Now You Don't.

[1:20:03] No, is it called Now You Three Me by anybody

[1:20:05] or just by you?

[1:20:06] Just by me.

[1:20:07] Who was the good buddy?

[1:20:08] Was it Audrey?

[1:20:09] It was, we went to see it with Dan and Audrey.

[1:20:12] It was so fun.

[1:20:14] These movies are so silly

[1:20:16] and they take themselves just seriously enough,

[1:20:19] but no more.

[1:20:22] And it's like, I don't know,

[1:20:23] it's like the kind of like the big budget action adventure,

[1:20:27] but like there's not that much action

[1:20:29] unless you count magic.

[1:20:31] And the magic tricks are like really silly

[1:20:34] and don't really make sense.

[1:20:35] Yeah.

[1:20:36] And it has this elaborate mythology

[1:20:37] that also doesn't make sense.

[1:20:39] And it's getting to like almost Fast and Furious levels.

[1:20:42] I love it.

[1:20:43] I can't get enough.

[1:20:44] Yum, yum, yum.

[1:20:45] Pour it in my mouth.

[1:20:46] And in this one, you have Rosamund Pike

[1:20:48] playing a Afrikaans like diamond mine owner.

[1:20:54] And she is like full on Bond villain.

[1:20:56] She gobbles up every scene she's in

[1:20:59] with this wild Afrikaans accent

[1:21:01] that vacillates between believable

[1:21:03] to just absolutely bonkers.

[1:21:06] It's great.

[1:21:07] I love it.

[1:21:07] It's so good.

[1:21:09] And yeah, and the additions to the cast are fun.

[1:21:12] And yeah, it's, yeah, it's, I love it.

[1:21:15] Two thumbs up.

[1:21:16] It was a lot of fun.

[1:21:17] I was surprised at just how engaged I was

[1:21:20] seeing one of these in the theater.

[1:21:21] Going into it, I was like,

[1:21:22] is this gonna be as fun as watching these movies,

[1:21:25] the previous two and how silly they were

[1:21:27] and just being like, am I enjoying this ironically

[1:21:30] or just enjoying it?

[1:21:31] And then you realize it doesn't matter.

[1:21:34] It doesn't matter.

[1:21:35] Yeah, they merge at a certain point.

[1:21:36] That's fun.

[1:21:39] I'm gonna recommend a similar kind of movie.

[1:21:41] No, just kidding.

[1:21:42] It's a very different movie.

[1:21:43] I've been, I decided I needed, for my own purposes,

[1:21:47] I needed to go back to a movie

[1:21:48] that is a little bit of a comfort food movie

[1:21:50] for me to watch recently

[1:21:51] and see if it still provided what I wanted it to provide.

[1:21:54] And so I watched the movie, Being There,

[1:21:56] the Hal Ashby movie with Peter Sellers

[1:21:58] and Sharon McLean and watching it,

[1:22:00] I was like, yep, I still love this movie.

[1:22:02] It's still beautiful and also funny at the same time.

[1:22:05] And the fact that they're able to pull off a satire

[1:22:09] that feels very kind of like calm and stately

[1:22:12] without losing the satire or the humor is astounding to me.

[1:22:16] That it's like, it's a satirical movie

[1:22:18] that is not really calling attention to itself

[1:22:20] or shouting the jokes or shouting its points

[1:22:22] or anything like that.

[1:22:23] And the stuff they do with clips of TV shows

[1:22:26] from the 70s, things like that,

[1:22:27] for anyone who's not familiar with Being There,

[1:22:29] it is a movie about a man

[1:22:30] who has some sort of mental impairment

[1:22:34] and only knows the world through television, essentially.

[1:22:37] And he is forced out into the outside world

[1:22:40] and gets mixed up with people in Washington, D.C.

[1:22:43] and rich people.

[1:22:44] And they believe that his very basic statements

[1:22:47] about gardening, because he has been a gardener

[1:22:49] his entire life, are elaborate metaphors

[1:22:51] about the economy or whatever,

[1:22:53] or emotions or things like that.

[1:22:54] And they all read into what he's saying,

[1:22:56] what they basically want him to be saying to them.

[1:22:58] And the question, on a very basic level,

[1:23:02] it's a satire of like, oh, this guy,

[1:23:04] when you say something that means nothing,

[1:23:06] people read things into it.

[1:23:07] But at a deeper level, it becomes about like,

[1:23:10] are we all just kind of like people programmed

[1:23:13] by what the media has told us to expect about the world

[1:23:15] who kind of like say things that don't mean anything

[1:23:21] or are not understanding what other people are saying to us.

[1:23:25] And I just, I really love it.

[1:23:26] It's a very, and it's also just a very calm movie.

[1:23:28] Like it's a very calm, kind of like stately,

[1:23:31] kind of like, kind of a, I don't know,

[1:23:35] just not upsetting movie in terms of the way it moves.

[1:23:39] So it was really exactly what I needed at the time.

[1:23:41] So that's Being There with Peter Sellers and Shirley MacLaine.

[1:23:45] I need to revisit that one,

[1:23:46] because I saw that as a kid,

[1:23:48] which is probably not the ideal way.

[1:23:51] I was expecting something funnier.

[1:23:53] And I also was like reading it more

[1:23:57] sort of on the basic level of the, yeah, yeah, I get it.

[1:24:00] Like people think that this guy's deep when he's not,

[1:24:03] you know, but it's so beloved.

[1:24:06] I'm sure that if I revisited it now,

[1:24:08] I would find more in it to enjoy.

[1:24:10] I think so.

[1:24:11] I mean, it's a movie that I think,

[1:24:12] especially if you're seeing it as a kid

[1:24:14] and you're familiar with Peter Sellers,

[1:24:15] you're like, this is gonna be silly.

[1:24:16] And it's like, not really silly.

[1:24:19] Yeah, we're the shenanigans.

[1:24:20] Yeah, exactly.

[1:24:21] And a lot of kids are big Sellers heads.

[1:24:23] Well, I mean, I certainly was from watching like-

[1:24:25] Certainly Dan was, I'm sure.

[1:24:26] Yeah, Panther films at the-

[1:24:28] Yeah, and I think it's a very controlled movie.

[1:24:31] And so I think to see the stuff that's in it,

[1:24:33] sometimes it might take an adult eye, you know?

[1:24:36] And I find, there are moments in it

[1:24:37] that I find genuinely very beautiful, you know,

[1:24:39] which is not something I can say for a lot of comedies,

[1:24:42] you know, where it's like,

[1:24:43] oh, this moment becomes beautiful

[1:24:44] and not in the way of-

[1:24:46] Like a Borat naked wrestling sequence?

[1:24:49] I mean, there is something beautiful

[1:24:50] about that Borat naked wrestling sequence, to be honest,

[1:24:52] but this is beautiful in a different way.

[1:24:53] But not in the way of like,

[1:24:55] well, to make this comedy respectable,

[1:24:57] we've got to make it suddenly sad.

[1:24:59] And this movie has an autumnal feel to it.

[1:25:02] And there is a sadness to it,

[1:25:03] but it's not like you're not seeing characters

[1:25:05] like kind of screaming and crying

[1:25:07] and proving that they can do drama,

[1:25:10] you know, or something like that, so.

[1:25:13] Well, guys, that's the flophouse for this week,

[1:25:18] I believe, unless I'm mistaken.

[1:25:20] And if I am mistaken,

[1:25:22] then I apologize to everyone for lying to you.

[1:25:25] But I think this might be the first full episode

[1:25:27] of the new year, so.

[1:25:31] We're recording this slightly ahead of time.

[1:25:33] That's why Dan is uncertain.

[1:25:34] It's not because Dan has dementia

[1:25:36] and doesn't remember what time of year it is.

[1:25:38] So did you make, have you make a new year's resolution, Dan?

[1:25:43] How's your resolution going so far?

[1:25:45] I don't believe in new year's resolutions, I think.

[1:25:47] Everyday's resolution.

[1:25:48] Because they believe in you.

[1:25:49] Yeah.

[1:25:50] Oh, well, thank you.

[1:25:52] You know what?

[1:25:53] Is it, is it, is it?

[1:25:56] Let's get to the bottom of this.

[1:25:58] I don't know.

[1:25:59] Anyway, happy new year, either way.

[1:26:03] The whole point is, well, you know what?

[1:26:04] There's no law that's, there's no law that's.

[1:26:07] Oh no, Dan, the cops are at the door.

[1:26:08] They're taking you away.

[1:26:10] Could have just wrapped up the episode.

[1:26:12] Nope.

[1:26:14] I'm allowed to do it early.

[1:26:16] If I'm doing it early, if I'm doing it late,

[1:26:18] happy new year.

[1:26:19] No, this episode will come out January 3rd, Dan.

[1:26:21] You're right in the pocket.

[1:26:22] Oh, okay, great.

[1:26:23] I get it.

[1:26:24] Have you ever heard of an unforced error?

[1:26:25] You know what?

[1:26:26] I also told you, I was like Elliot earlier.

[1:26:28] I was like, I told you this is gonna be on January 3rd.

[1:26:31] So I don't know why I forgot it.

[1:26:34] It's not that you forgot it.

[1:26:35] It's that you immediately doubted your memory of it.

[1:26:38] That's true.

[1:26:38] Your recollection of what date this will be, yeah.

[1:26:40] Happy new year.

[1:26:43] You know, it's been a rough one.

[1:26:45] Dan was about to perfectly land the fighter jet

[1:26:48] onto the aircraft carrier,

[1:26:49] and then he suddenly spilled hot coffee in his lap

[1:26:51] and started jerking the throttle around.

[1:26:55] It's been a rough one.

[1:26:56] Why are you drinking hot coffee in a fighter jet, Dan?

[1:26:58] You got that mask on.

[1:26:59] You can't even get it to your mouth.

[1:27:01] I wish better times for us all, including,

[1:27:06] our great producer, Alex Smith.

[1:27:08] Thank you for producing us.

[1:27:09] He goes by the name HowlDotty all over the internet.

[1:27:12] Thank you to Maximum Fun, our network.

[1:27:16] Go over to MaximumFun.org

[1:27:20] and check out all the other great podcasts on it.

[1:27:22] Stuart's shaking his head at the turn this took.

[1:27:25] The abrupt turn back into professionalism.

[1:27:29] Boring.

[1:27:31] Dan, fuck up some more, please.

[1:27:34] Thank you for listening.

[1:27:36] We hope you stick with us in the new year.

[1:27:39] For The Flophouse, I've been Dan McCloy.

[1:27:41] I've been Stuart Wellington.

[1:27:43] I'm Elliot Kalin, Rebirth.

[1:27:46] Bye.

[1:27:53] Okay, let's just do the thing, being the podcast.

[1:27:59] Oh, that's the thing, you know,

[1:28:01] not do the thing as in have sex with a monster

[1:28:03] from the thing.

[1:28:05] I mean.

[1:28:06] It can change, any shape you want.

[1:28:08] Any shape you want.

[1:28:08] You want to have sex with a dog with tentacles?

[1:28:10] That's your man.

[1:28:12] Hear me out.

[1:28:15] Just release all of these outtakes of the mini.

[1:28:19] Okay, I'm done chomping on mango, calm down.

[1:28:22] Stop giving me looks, Dan.

[1:28:25] He's giving me that fucking Dan McCloy stank eye.

[1:28:27] Oh, I know exactly what you're talking about.

[1:28:29] Yeah, the dank eye, yeah.

[1:28:30] Making sure it's done so we don't annoy our listeners.

[1:28:34] Okay, here we go.

[1:28:35] Dan, what we do is annoy our listeners.

[1:28:39] Maximum fun.

[1:28:40] A worker-owned network.

[1:28:41] Of artists-owned shows.

[1:28:43] Supported.

[1:28:44] Directly.

[1:28:45] By you.

Jurassic World: Rebirth

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