FH Mini #150 - Best Stephen King Movies

[0:00] Hey there, folks.

Stuart Wellington

[0:05] This is Stuart Wellington of the Flophouse Podcast,

[0:07] and I want to welcome you to another edition of the Flophouse Mini.

[0:11] This is a slightly shorter version of the Flophouse Podcast

[0:14] where instead of watching a bad movie, we do kind of whatever.

[0:17] And I am joined by the other two members of the Flophouse.

[0:20] Dan McCoy!

Elliott Kalan

[0:21] And Elliot Kalin.

Stuart Wellington

[0:24] Matching my energy. I love it.

[0:25] Now, in honor of a recent episode, that's right, Dreamcatcher,

[0:30] I thought we should go for the king of cinema.

[0:33] That's right.

[0:33] We're going to talk about the cinematic works of one Stephen King.

[0:38] Stephen King, you might know him.

[0:39] He is a novelist.

[0:40] He was at one point, apparently, a cocaine user.

[0:44] And he has so many screenwriting credits.

[0:48] I thought it would be fun if we took a look at his various movies

[0:52] and we did a definitive, that's right,

[0:54] a definitive top ten ranking of them based on our own personal judgments.

[1:00] Now, looking at the works of Stephen King,

[1:02] I know you'd probably say,

[1:03] that guy's got a couple of movies under his belt.

[1:05] And you know what?

[1:06] I thought that until I looked at his fucking filmography

[1:08] and there's like zillions.

Dan McCoy

[1:10] Well, this is what I was going to ask.

[1:12] When you say screenwriting credit,

[1:13] like are these the ones where he literally has a screenwriting credit

[1:16] or it's based on a work by Adlin?

[1:18] Based on works by.

Stuart Wellington

[1:19] I'm not going to do screenwriting credits

[1:20] because that's like what, like three movies?

[1:22] Like Maximum Overdrive.

[1:24] I directed one, you know.

[1:25] There's one I think that is actually going to do.

[1:27] We are not going to do that.

[1:30] Sleepwalkers.

[1:31] We are in fact just going to be talking about movies

[1:35] that are either based on works or screenplays he wrote.

[1:38] But we're talking about movies.

[1:39] Now, this is not TV.

[1:40] This is not episodes of things.

[1:41] Sorry, Langoliers.

[1:43] Get the fuck out of here.

[1:44] Get the fuck out of here, Castle Rock.

[1:45] If we were just talking about like TV or TV movies.

[1:48] Sorry, Kingdom Hospital.

[1:49] That was him, right?

[1:50] It would be going on forever.

[1:52] It would be going like,

[1:53] I got to say,

[1:53] like just looking at his upcoming credits,

[1:56] it's like 50 things.

[1:57] It's bonkers.

[1:59] Sorry, The Shining with Tim Daly.

Elliott Kalan

[2:01] Or was that Steven Webster?

[2:02] Webber.

[2:03] Steven.

[2:03] No, wait, Webber.

[2:04] Webber.

Elliott Kalan

[2:04] It was Steven Webber,

[2:06] but he was doing it as Webster

[2:07] from the TV show Webster.

Stuart Wellington

[2:09] Oh, Dorp style.

[2:11] Yeah, some people thought it was in bad taste.

[2:12] Not me, though.

[2:13] No.

[2:15] Steven Webber,

[2:16] I know less from Wings

[2:17] and more from his very successful runs

[2:19] on Celebrity Jeopardy.

[2:21] He's very talented.

[2:22] Or Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.

[2:24] I've never heard of it.

[2:25] You've never heard of it.

[2:25] You guys want to talk to me about it

[2:26] for an hour?

[2:28] I would love to talk to you about it

[2:29] for more than an hour.

[2:30] Okay, but we don't have time for that.

[2:31] We have to go through these movies.

Elliott Kalan

[2:32] We've got to do a Studio 60 season

[2:34] at some point.

Stuart Wellington

[2:34] Yeah, at some point.

[2:35] So what we're going to be doing

[2:36] is we're going to be going,

[2:38] I did my best.

[2:39] Now, guys, listeners,

[2:40] I did my best to like parse

[2:42] what counts,

[2:43] and I'm doing currently

[2:44] feature-length films.

[2:47] Okay.

[2:48] Ideally, some are released on video,

[2:50] but they're all movies.

[2:53] But you're not doing any

Elliott Kalan

[2:53] from like the Dollar Baby project

[2:55] or whatever it's called

[2:56] where he'll license his stories

[2:58] for a dollar to a student filmmaker

[2:59] or an independent filmmaker.

Stuart Wellington

[3:00] I don't think so

[3:01] because once again,

[3:02] we're talking feature-length films,

[3:03] not like short films.

[3:04] Yeah, those are usually shorts.

[3:05] Again, please-

[3:06] Will Shortz,

[3:07] the crossword puzzle editor.

[3:08] So to cut this list down,

[3:10] which is enormous,

[3:12] we are going to first do

[3:14] a quick weeding process

[3:16] where you guys are going to say-

[3:17] We've got to weed all his books.

[3:19] That's a lot of books to weed.

[3:20] We're going to be like

[3:21] virtual lawnmower men

[3:22] and we are going to weed this garden.

[3:25] So what I'm going to do

[3:26] is I'm going to list the name

[3:27] and year of a work

[3:29] and if you want to cut it,

[3:30] you guys just jump in

[3:32] and you say cut it, ax it,

[3:33] get it out of here, okay?

[3:34] Do I have to do the Dave Coulier

Elliott Kalan

[3:35] cut it out hand signal?

Stuart Wellington

[3:37] You don't

[3:37] because that's going to take

[3:38] way too long.

[3:39] We've got a million of these

[3:40] to go through.

[3:41] So we're actually,

[3:42] these are going to be in order

[3:44] but backwards

[3:44] starting with right now, today.

[3:47] Okay?

[3:47] So we're going back in time.

Elliott Kalan

[3:50] We're going back in time.

[3:51] This round is just cutting movies

[3:52] that we are dismissing out of hand.

Stuart Wellington

[3:54] There is no way

[3:55] this is going to be in our top ten.

[3:56] Okay.

[3:57] Okay.

[3:58] So first,

[3:59] The Running Man 2025.

Dan McCoy

[4:00] Kill it.

[4:01] I liked it, but kill it.

[4:02] Okay.

[4:03] The Long Walk.

[4:04] Haven't seen it yet.

[4:05] Kill it.

Stuart Wellington

[4:06] The Monkey 2025.

[4:07] Haven't seen it.

[4:08] Kill it.

[4:08] No, no, no.

[4:09] I'm going to leave it.

[4:10] I'm going to leave it.

[4:11] Sims Lot 2024.

Dan McCoy

[4:13] Kill it.

[4:14] I haven't seen it either

[4:15] so I can't speak to it.

Stuart Wellington

[4:16] I'm going to say kill it.

[4:17] The Life of Chuck.

[4:19] I've heard good things.

Dan McCoy

[4:21] I liked it okay,

[4:22] but I don't think it's going to hit the top.

Stuart Wellington

[4:24] Pet Sematary Bloodlines.

[4:26] Kill it.

[4:27] The Boogeyman.

[4:29] What?

[4:31] Mr. Harrigan's Phone.

[4:33] What?

[4:33] No.

[4:34] I don't know what that is.

[4:35] Firestarter 2022.

[4:36] No, absolutely not.

[4:37] No, we watched that.

[4:38] That's crap, yeah.

[4:39] Children of the Corn 2020.

Elliott Kalan

[4:42] I'm sorry if they did one.

[4:44] So Children of the Corn 2020

[4:46] is the Barbara Walters Hugh Downs

[4:47] Children of the Corn?

[4:49] Yeah.

[4:50] Yeah, exactly.

[4:51] Okay.

[4:52] It comes on after TGIF

[4:53] so I guess I'll watch it, yeah.

[4:55] They all wait.

Stuart Wellington

[4:55] Andy Rooney was 2020, right?

Elliott Kalan

[4:57] No, that was 60 Minutes.

[4:58] Oh, fuck.

[4:58] Wrong TV show.

[4:59] Wrong news magazine show

[5:00] with a number in the title.

[5:00] Wrong numerical news show.

[5:03] Okay.

[5:04] Doctor Sleep.

[5:06] Kill it.

[5:07] I heard good things though.

Dan McCoy

[5:09] I like it okay.

[5:10] It's just a borderline case.

[5:11] I say kill it, I guess.

[5:11] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[5:12] In the Tall Grass.

[5:13] Don't know what that is.

[5:14] Kill it.

[5:15] It Chapter 2.

[5:17] Kill it.

[5:19] Yeah.

[5:19] Elliot, are you just going to say kill it?

[5:20] For most things.

[5:23] You're trying to make this,

[5:24] I mean it will make this mini shorter.

[5:26] Yeah, and also a lot of things get murdered.

Elliott Kalan

[5:28] Dan, do you want to keep It Chapter 2?

[5:29] I have to admit,

[5:30] I never saw It Chapter 2.

[5:31] I saw It Chapter 1 and it annoyed me

[5:33] so I never saw It Chapter 2.

Dan McCoy

[5:33] I'm one of the defenders of It Chapter 2

[5:35] because I like how wacky it gets

[5:37] but if we're going to keep one on here

[5:39] I would probably argue for keeping the first It.

[5:42] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[5:43] Pet Cemetery 2019.

[5:45] Didn't see it.

Dan McCoy

[5:46] Oh, no, no.

[5:47] That was no good.

Stuart Wellington

[5:48] Children of the Corn Runaway.

[5:50] Don't know it.

Dan McCoy

[5:52] No.

[5:53] 1922.

[5:55] What?

[5:56] Wait.

[5:56] Oh, yeah.

[5:57] This is that Netflix one.

[5:58] I think it's a Netflix one.

[5:59] Based on a short story, I think.

[6:00] I don't know that one.

[6:01] No.

[6:01] I don't, yeah,

[6:02] I don't know enough about it.

[6:04] It Chapter 1 or just It.

[6:06] I'd say let's keep it in for now.

Stuart Wellington

[6:07] You can hold on to it if you want.

[6:08] The Dark Tower.

[6:10] No, absolutely not.

[6:11] That was garbage.

[6:12] Gerald's Game.

[6:14] Maybe.

[6:14] Oh, that one's.

[6:15] I'm going to keep it, yeah.

[6:16] Maybe.

[6:16] I'm going to keep it, yeah.

[6:17] Yeah, yeah.

[6:18] Ellie's like,

[6:18] Bruce Greenwood and Carla Gugino being hot and sexy.

Elliott Kalan

[6:22] I mean,

[6:22] it stops being sexy when she has to slice the skin off her own hands.

[6:26] But, you know,

[6:26] I'm not into that.

[6:28] But the first couple minutes, sure, yeah.

[6:31] Sell.

[6:32] You know what?

[6:33] I never saw the movie.

[6:33] I never saw Sell,

Dan McCoy

[6:35] but I don't think it's good.

[6:37] We haven't seen it.

[6:38] It does have John Cusack.

[6:39] It's late period John Cusack, though.

[6:41] Which is not a good sign.

[6:42] How about Mercy 2014?

[6:45] What the fuck is that?

[6:46] Oh, that was the John Stamos, Stephen King combo?

[6:48] I think so.

[6:49] Yeah, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[6:49] I think it is.

[6:51] I don't know that one.

Elliott Kalan

[6:52] A Good Marriage.

Dan McCoy

[6:53] Don't know it.

[6:54] That one's actually kind of a nice sleeper,

[6:57] but I don't think.

Elliott Kalan

[6:58] No, Sleeper's a Woody Allen movie, Dan.

Dan McCoy

[7:00] Oh.

[7:01] You don't have Sleepwalkers.

[7:01] That's Stephen King.

[7:03] A Good Marriage Sleeper.

Stuart Wellington

[7:06] Carrie 2013.

Dan McCoy

[7:08] I don't know for sure,

[7:10] but I'm going to say no.

Elliott Kalan

[7:11] I think there's going to be a Carrie on this list.

[7:14] It will not be that one.

[7:15] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[7:15] Children of the Corn Genesis.

Elliott Kalan

[7:19] It's so funny.

Dan McCoy

[7:20] I think it's a very tenuous

[7:21] linked King at this point,

[7:22] but sure.

Elliott Kalan

[7:24] Children of the Corn is one of those series

[7:25] where I'm like,

[7:26] I have never dealt with it

[7:27] except the first one,

[7:29] and I have so much trouble believing

[7:30] there's so many entries.

[7:31] Yeah.

[7:32] Oh, boy.

[7:32] Oh, boy, howdy.

[7:33] Yeah.

[7:34] There's a view.

[7:35] There's nothing about the first

[7:35] Children of the Corn movie

[7:36] where I'm like,

[7:37] this has legs.

[7:37] Do more of these.

Stuart Wellington

[7:38] Microsoft Excel was getting very annoyed

[7:40] that they're like,

[7:41] you mean Children of the Corn?

[7:42] I'm like,

[7:43] no, no, no.

[7:43] It's a different one.

[7:44] This is a new one.

Elliott Kalan

[7:46] Clippy the paperclip is like,

[7:47] it seems like you're putting in

[7:48] another goddamn Children of the Corn movie.

Stuart Wellington

[7:49] I'm going to put an X

[7:50] under Children of the Corn Genesis.

[7:51] I'll agree with that.

[7:52] Dolan's Cadillac.

[7:54] This has a friend of the pod,

[7:56] Christian Slater.

[7:57] I don't know.

[7:58] What?

Dan McCoy

[8:00] And then we talked about

[8:01] his cash grab philosophy.

[8:03] I haven't seen that one.

Stuart Wellington

[8:04] Okay.

[8:05] 14.08.

[8:06] Another John Cusack.

[8:07] That one's not bad.

[8:08] I never watched that one

[8:09] and I should have

[8:09] because that short story is,

[8:11] I really love that short story.

Elliott Kalan

[8:11] Let's keep it in for now

[8:12] because I fear that we're cutting so much.

Dan McCoy

[8:15] The Mist.

[8:17] Yeah, I'll keep it in for now.

[8:18] I'm not the fan of the ending of that

[8:20] that a lot of people are, but.

[8:22] Well, maybe you just can't handle it, Wimp.

[8:25] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[8:25] I think I prefer the original video game, Mist,

[8:28] that it was based on.

[8:29] No, I'm just kidding.

Stuart Wellington

[8:30] It's a terrible game.

[8:30] Yeah, Stephen King played so much Mist

[8:32] that he wrote a movie about it.

[8:34] Yeah.

[8:35] Riding the Bullet.

Dan McCoy

[8:37] I never saw that one.

[8:37] Riding the Bullet.

[8:38] No, I don't know.

[8:39] No.

[8:39] Secret Window.

[8:41] That is a goofy-ass movie,

[8:42] but I can't make an argument for it.

[8:44] That is a very goofy movie, yeah.

[8:45] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[8:46] Uh-oh.

[8:46] Dream Catcher.

Dan McCoy

[8:48] No, thank you.

[8:48] Keep it on board.

Stuart Wellington

[8:50] No, kill that one, too.

[8:51] The Dead Zone 2002.

Elliott Kalan

[8:54] What?

[8:54] We didn't watch that one, did we?

[8:56] No.

[8:57] Again, there's going to be a Dead Zone on this list.

[8:58] It will not be that Dead Zone.

[8:59] Yeah.

[9:00] Yeah.

[9:00] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[9:01] Children of the Corn Revelation.

Dan McCoy

Elliott Kalan

[9:06] Okay.

[9:06] What could they be revealing?

Stuart Wellington

[9:08] What's the revelation?

Dan McCoy

[9:09] At this late date?

[9:10] Yeah.

[9:11] Hearts in Atlantis.

[9:12] Corn has had so many children at this point.

Stuart Wellington

[9:14] What about Hearts in Atlantis, gang?

[9:15] No.

[9:16] Some fecund corn.

[9:17] No.

[9:17] It's got Anthony Hopkins in it.

[9:19] I think I'm going to kill Hearts in Atlantis, yeah.

[9:21] Oh, no.

[9:23] One second.

Elliott Kalan

[9:24] Dan, do you want to defend Hearts in Atlantis, the other William Goldman, Stephen King movie?

Dan McCoy

[9:27] I have never seen it.

[9:29] It looks boring.

Stuart Wellington

[9:31] The Green Mile.

[9:33] Keep.

Dan McCoy

[9:33] Okay.

[9:34] I'll allow it.

[9:35] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[9:36] Okay.

[9:36] There may be two prison movies on this list.

[9:39] We'll see.

[9:39] Is this another Children of the Corn movie?

[9:41] Children of the Corn 666 Isaac's Rebirth.

[9:45] Well, that one.

Elliott Kalan

[9:46] They couldn't even decide on what subtitle to get.

Stuart Wellington

[9:48] Guys, you know 90% of this mini is just me getting excited to read Children of the Corn.

Dan McCoy

[9:52] Well, Matt, I mean, this is like, if this mini is doing one thing, it's making me want to run through the Children of the Corn movies.

Elliott Kalan

[9:58] You should have done that for the Boku instead of the Transformers.

[10:01] Boku.

[10:02] Boku.

[10:03] Okay.

[10:03] Well.

[10:04] We should have drank a lot of Boku and then watched all the Children of the Corn movies.

Stuart Wellington

[10:07] The Rage colon Carrie 2.

[10:10] I never saw that one.

Dan McCoy

[10:11] I've heard some defenders of that, but I don't, yeah, I don't think it's going to be the Carrie that we.

Elliott Kalan

[10:15] No, again, I think this will be one Carrie on the list.

[10:17] Yeah.

[10:18] Sometimes they come back for more.

Dan McCoy

[10:22] At the Golden Corral Buffet.

Stuart Wellington

[10:25] I'm going to say no to that one.

[10:27] Apt Pupil.

[10:29] Oh, well.

[10:30] I like this one.

Elliott Kalan

[10:31] It's a good movie that is icky because of the director and the way that the cast was treated.

[10:36] Oh, yeah, it's a bright.

[10:37] So that's a hard one.

[10:38] Let's not kill it yet, but it's going to be – it's one of those things where are we judging the work or are we judging the creation of the work?

Stuart Wellington

[10:44] Yeah, that's true.

[10:46] Children of the Corn 5, Fields of Terror.

[10:49] This is the fifth one.

[10:50] We've been going backwards and we've only hit five now.

[10:52] Yeah, the 666 is before this, yeah.

[10:55] Oh, yeah.

[10:55] The Night Flyer.

Dan McCoy

[10:57] I never saw The Night Flyer.

[10:58] I remember the commercials.

[10:59] Nope.

Stuart Wellington

[11:01] Thinner.

Dan McCoy

[11:03] Thinner is a very weirdly watchable movie.

[11:07] Like if I come across Thinner, like –

Stuart Wellington

[11:09] Weirdly watchable raves damn my heart.

[11:11] Flipping the channels, I'm like, oh, maybe I'll watch some of Thinner.

Dan McCoy

[11:14] But I don't think it's good enough to –

[11:16] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[11:17] We've killed so many.

[11:18] Do you want to hold on to it just for a moment and then we can kill it later?

[11:20] Just for a moment.

Dan McCoy

[11:21] We have tons more to go for.

[11:23] All right.

Stuart Wellington

[11:23] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[11:24] We have at least 30 more to go for.

[11:26] Yeah.

[11:26] Wow.

[11:27] Thomas.

[11:28] Did they ever make a movie of Eyes of the Dragon?

Stuart Wellington

[11:30] No.

[11:30] No, they should have.

[11:31] They keep threatening to do that or like make it a miniseries, but I don't think it's ever

[11:34] a good first.

Elliott Kalan

[11:34] I remember reading that as a kid and being like, when's the horror stuff going to happen?

[11:39] And then when it was over, I was like, I was glad there was no horror stuff.

[11:41] This is a straight fantasy book.

[11:42] It's good.

Stuart Wellington

[11:43] Children of the Corn for the Gathering.

Elliott Kalan

[11:45] So who's Gathering and why?

Dan McCoy

[11:47] The Juggalos, I see.

[11:48] Oh, I see.

[11:49] That's good.

Stuart Wellington

[11:50] The original Children of the Corn.

Dan McCoy

[11:51] Corn Children for the Juggalos.

[11:53] They're the Children of the Faygo.

[11:54] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[11:55] Okay.

[11:55] Sometimes They Come Back.

[11:57] Again.

Dan McCoy

[11:59] Wow.

[12:00] I didn't know there were two sequels.

Stuart Wellington

[12:02] Yeah, there are.

[12:02] Two sequels.

Dan McCoy

[12:04] Because they keep coming back sometimes.

[12:04] Even the first one, isn't that good?

Stuart Wellington

[12:06] Are you wearing the Sometimes They Come Back sequel?

[12:09] Yeah.

[12:12] Dolores Claiborne.

[12:13] Yeah, let's keep that on there.

[12:14] That's a pretty good movie.

[12:15] Okay.

[12:15] Yeah.

[12:16] Children of the Corn 3, Urban Harvest, which does sound like a grocery store.

[12:20] I want to tell you something.

Dan McCoy

[12:21] I'm not going to argue for this to be on the thing, but I saw this at a weird Wednesday

[12:26] before the Alamo got in Shittified, and it was so much of a blast that I showed it

[12:33] at my Halloween thing, party, I think, last year.

[12:39] And it was a delight.

[12:40] Everyone had a great time.

Stuart Wellington

[12:42] That sounds like an argument to keep it on the list.

Dan McCoy

[12:44] I mean, I'm going to say-

[12:45] I'm not going to say it's a good movie.

[12:46] I'm saying if you're looking for a silly horror movie that you're going to have a lot

[12:50] of fun watching-

Stuart Wellington

[12:50] What Dan is really doing is making a case for us running the series of-

[12:55] I think you got to do it.

Elliott Kalan

[12:56] The COTCs.

[12:57] Yeah.

[12:57] COTC, Urban Harvest.

[12:59] Can we become children of the corn?

[13:01] We'll find out.

[13:01] I think Dolores Claiborne, going back to that, I think let's keep it for now.

[13:04] I don't know that it's going to end up on that top 10 list.

Stuart Wellington

[13:06] Especially because it's competing against another very strong Kathy Bates contender.

[13:09] Yes.

[13:10] Exactly.

[13:11] We got The Mangler.

Dan McCoy

[13:13] No.

[13:13] A lot of fun, but no.

[13:15] The Shawshank Redemption.

[13:17] Yeah.

[13:17] No.

[13:17] That's not my-

[13:18] Just kidding.

[13:18] We should put that on.

[13:19] It's not my film, but yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[13:21] It's a good one.

[13:21] It is a very good movie.

[13:22] It is a very good movie.

[13:23] Needful Things.

[13:24] Needful Things I've never seen because I don't think it'll live up to my idea of what that

[13:29] story should be.

[13:30] It's such a great concept for a story.

Stuart Wellington

[13:31] It feels like a very vague movie.

Dan McCoy

[13:33] Yeah.

[13:34] Needful Things has some fun, but it gets boring after a while, the movie.

[13:38] Uh-huh.

Stuart Wellington

[13:39] The Dark Half.

[13:40] Yes.

[13:41] We're entering the era of Stuart sees these movies in the theater.

[13:45] Yeah.

[13:45] The Dark Half, I think we can keep for now.

[13:47] We'll keep it for now, yeah.

[13:48] Children of the Corn 2, The Final Sacrifice.

[13:51] Obviously not, because there's at least four more of them.

[13:53] No, no.

[13:55] Uh, Sleepwalkers.

[13:58] No.

Dan McCoy

[13:58] It's so funny, though.

[13:59] But also, one of our early Flophouse live shows, so that's a fun one to watch.

[14:03] Yeah, that's true.

Stuart Wellington

[14:03] Well, The Lawnmower Man.

Elliott Kalan

[14:06] So, wait, you didn't include Lawnmower Man 2, did you?

[14:09] It wasn't listed.

[14:11] Oh, no.

[14:11] Or maybe it was, but I missed it.

[14:12] I wonder if it's because it's so far from-

[14:14] I think that was one where he actually asked his name to be taken off of it.

[14:17] Yeah.

[14:17] So, maybe that's why.

[14:18] Maybe that's why, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[14:18] Yeah, this is not really-

[14:19] Now that I think about it, I'm like, yeah, I would have put it in there, obviously.

[14:23] Job's Revenge, right?

[14:24] Yeah, Job's Revenge.

[14:24] Yeah, Job's Jobbing.

Elliott Kalan

[14:26] It's Job's Job.

[14:27] The Lawnmower Man is one of the most bizarre, extremely weird adaptations.

[14:33] Yeah.

[14:33] Because the short story is about a man who, like, worships Pan and eats the grass off of

[14:38] people's mouths, right?

Stuart Wellington

[14:39] Yeah, it's about a literal Lawnmower Man.

[14:41] I was confused when I read the book, the story after watching the movie.

[14:45] You're like, when do they have cyber sex?

[14:47] I don't understand.

[14:48] When do they fly through cyberspace?

[14:51] When do we all jack into the Matrix?

[14:53] Okay, so we're leaving Lawnmower Man in, okay.

[14:56] No, wait, wait, what?

[14:57] Hold on a second.

[14:57] Wait a minute, wait a minute.

[14:58] It's a great goofy movie, but it's not a good Stephen King movie.

[15:03] It's not the goofy movie.

[15:05] Yeah.

[15:05] I also feel like-

[15:06] The goofy movie is maybe Stephen King's best movie.

[15:08] I also feel like, now that I'm going through this, I feel like Pet Sematary 2 might not

[15:14] even be in here.

[15:15] Oh, wow.

[15:15] Similarly, maybe he had his name taken off.

[15:18] Yeah.

[15:18] Okay.

[15:19] I think he did.

[15:20] I think there's another one where he has to have his name.

[15:21] That's a fun sequel, though.

[15:22] That one is a fun sequel.

[15:23] It has one of my favorite horror movie laugh moments when he rips that kid's face off

[15:29] with the motorcycle wheel, and he's like, oops.

[15:33] It's pretty funny.

Elliott Kalan

[15:35] Stephen King is a little weird about which movies he wants his name on.

[15:38] Like Dreamcatchers-

[15:39] Oh, you think Stephen King's a weird guy?

[15:41] No, I don't think he's that weird in general, but I mean, he has an addictive personality.

[15:44] But with Dreamcatchers, at the time, he was like, they did a great job.

[15:48] This is going to be great.

[15:49] But with The Shining, he was like, nope, not interested, didn't like it.

[15:52] It's like, all right, well, we have different standards here.

Stuart Wellington

[15:55] Okay.

[15:56] Sometimes they come back.

[15:58] No.

[15:58] This is the first one.

[15:59] Regular style.

[16:00] Regular style, no.

[16:01] I've never actually seen it.

[16:02] I just remember seeing it in the video store.

Dan McCoy

[16:05] It's okay.

Stuart Wellington

[16:06] Okay, guys.

[16:06] Now we got a heavy hitter.

[16:08] Misery.

[16:08] Yeah, keep that on the list.

[16:11] Graveyard Shift.

[16:12] No.

[16:13] Tales from the Dark Side, the movie.

[16:16] I'm leaving that shit in.

[16:17] Okay.

[16:17] Skip.

[16:19] Pet Sematary, the original.

[16:21] Yeah.

[16:22] I'd say yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[16:23] The Running Man, the original.

[16:26] Oh, it's not that – it's pretty different from his – the book, but there's – I mean,

[16:30] here's the thing.

[16:30] We're just talking about quality of movies, not how close it is to the original.

[16:34] That movie is objectively a goofball movie, but it's pretty fun to watch.

[16:39] It's very fun.

Dan McCoy

[16:40] Yeah.

[16:41] It's hard to – I don't know.

[16:42] I'll let it.

[16:43] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[16:44] I think if we judge it on Death Race 2000 kind of like action satire quality, then yeah,

[16:50] I think let's keep it on the list for now.

[16:51] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[16:52] A Return to Salem's Lot.

[16:55] I haven't seen this one.

[16:56] No.

[16:56] I haven't seen that one, so I'm going to say no.

[16:57] Yeah.

[16:58] Creepshow 2.

[17:00] I am 1,000% leaving this one in.

[17:03] You can't argue with that.

[17:04] Okay.

[17:04] I don't even remember which – I don't remember Creepshow 2.

[17:05] I mean, I love The Raft.

Dan McCoy

[17:07] I think the rest of it's pretty bad.

[17:08] Is The Raft in Creepshow 2 or in Creepshow?

[17:10] No, it's definitely Creepshow 2.

Stuart Wellington

[17:11] I mean, I am leaving this in almost exclusively for nostalgia reasons.

[17:15] The Raft is great.

[17:16] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[17:17] For some reason, I thought that was in the first one.

[17:18] So I guess I do remember Creepshow 2 a little bit.

[17:20] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[17:21] The thanks for the ride, lady bit is a thing that my mom insisted I watch and fucked me up

[17:27] for a long time.

[17:27] So I'm like, thanks, mom.

[17:30] Okay.

[17:30] Stand by me.

[17:32] Yeah.

[17:32] Sure.

[17:33] Let's leave it on.

[17:34] How about that?

[17:35] Maximum Overdrive.

Dan McCoy

[17:37] Again.

[17:37] No, but again, a very fun movie to watch.

Elliott Kalan

[17:41] It is fun to watch, but it is – yeah, it's not a good movie.

[17:44] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[17:44] Stephen King's Golden Tales.

[17:47] I don't know what this is.

[17:48] I don't know what that is.

[17:49] It's a direct-to-video adventure.

Elliott Kalan

[17:50] Tales of urine that he has passed.

[17:52] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[17:55] Stephen King's Golden Showers.

[17:57] You're right.

[17:59] Yeah.

[18:00] Silver Bullet.

[18:01] I like this movie, but I'm not going to fight for it.

[18:04] I've never seen it.

Stuart Wellington

[18:06] I love the, what, Bernie Wrightson color plates in the book.

[18:10] Yeah, yeah.

[18:11] It's incredible.

[18:11] Like, super awesome.

[18:13] Can I vote on that?

[18:17] Cat's Eye.

[18:18] Cat's Eye.

[18:21] I haven't seen that since I was a kid.

[18:23] Cat's Eye.

Dan McCoy

[18:23] I like it.

[18:24] I particularly like the Quitters Incorporated segment, but I'm not going to say it.

[18:27] It belongs on the top.

Stuart Wellington

[18:30] First Starter, the original.

Dan McCoy

[18:32] No.

[18:33] It's pretty boring, even.

[18:34] Like, it's better than the new one, but.

Stuart Wellington

[18:35] Yeah.

[18:36] But that's a low bar to take.

[18:37] The original Children of the Corn.

Elliott Kalan

[18:39] The story that birthed the thousand ships.

[18:42] I mean, I feel like it's got to be on there just because it was so successful that it's

[18:45] had so many sequels, right?

[18:45] I don't remember it at all.

[18:47] It's not a good horror movie.

Dan McCoy

[18:48] It's a great short story.

Elliott Kalan

[18:50] All I remember is kids arguing with each other in a cornfield or next to a road.

[18:54] Like, I remember very little else about it.

[18:56] Okay.

[18:57] Christine.

[18:59] Yeah.

[19:00] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[19:02] It's pretty low on my carpenter list, but.

Elliott Kalan

[19:05] Yeah.

[19:05] Well, your number one would be the guy who made that table for you, right?

Stuart Wellington

[19:09] My number one is Dan's Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

[19:14] Okay.

[19:15] So, I'll leave it in.

[19:17] It's a carpenter.

[19:17] Let's leave it in for now.

[19:18] I don't think it'll make the 10, but.

[19:20] How about The Dead Zone?

[19:22] Oh, absolutely.

[19:23] That's a great movie.

[19:23] I love it.

[19:24] Cujo?

Elliott Kalan

[19:27] I don't remember the movie.

[19:28] I don't remember the movie that well either.

[19:29] I remember the book much better than the movie.

Dan McCoy

[19:31] Which speaks volumes for the movie.

[19:33] I think it's pretty good, but I don't think it's going to make the.

Elliott Kalan

[19:35] I also get Cujo mixed up with the movie Man's Best Friend, where the dog escapes from

[19:39] the government lab and it has superpowers.

[19:42] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[19:43] Okay.

[19:44] Or Chomps.

Elliott Kalan

[19:45] Or Chomps.

[19:46] Yeah.

[19:46] Or Homps, the movie about camels.

[19:48] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[19:49] Okay.

[19:50] Then we have.

Dan McCoy

[19:51] The funny thing is, I know that that's an actual movie.

[19:53] People might be thinking that's a joke, but it is a movie called Homps.

[19:56] No, that's a real movie.

[19:56] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[19:56] Based on a true story.

[19:58] Okay.

[19:59] We have.

[20:00] I'm going to hit no.

[20:02] Creepshow.

[20:03] Yes.

[20:03] Sure.

[20:05] The Shining.

Dan McCoy

[20:07] Yes.

[20:07] Although it's the movie that made me think I was having a heart attack.

Stuart Wellington

[20:10] I mean, that's a good movie.

[20:12] Yeah.

[20:13] Salem's Lot.

Dan McCoy

[20:15] I never actually have seen that.

[20:16] I don't think I've seen it either.

[20:18] Yeah.

[20:18] Yeah, I'm not.

[20:19] And Carrie.

[20:20] Yes.

[20:21] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[20:21] Let's put Carrie on that list, shall we?

[20:23] Okay.

[20:24] So that is the list.

Stuart Wellington

[20:24] There are fewer good ones than I remembered.

[20:28] Yeah.

[20:29] So we are going to take a brief pause while I tabulate.

[20:32] Alex, why don't you include some tabulate sounds here.

[20:35] It's going to take me one second, gang.

[20:40] While I get all these turds off the thing.

[20:46] Stuart has turds on his laptop.

Elliott Kalan

[20:48] Oh, turds on a laptop.

[20:50] Turds on a laptop.

[20:51] Never been there before.

[20:53] Who cares?

[20:54] Drop kick my laptop.

[20:56] Ask him to the door.

[20:58] No one's there.

Stuart Wellington

[21:01] The fun thing.

Dan McCoy

[21:02] Alex, I think you got to keep all this in now.

Stuart Wellington

[21:04] I think you have to.

[21:04] Yeah, yeah, sure.

[21:06] Until fucking Mr. Belvedere comes after us for stealing his fucking shit.

[21:10] Well, I hear the blues are calling turds on my laptop.

[21:16] For some reason.

Elliott Kalan

[21:17] And if I seem a bit confused, well, maybe.

[21:19] I've got turds on my laptop.

Dan McCoy

[21:20] But I don't know what to do with all those turds that are on my laptop.

[21:24] YouTube was.

[21:25] They're staining again.

[21:26] YouTube was feeding me the Mr. Belvedere fan club SNL sketch the other day.

Elliott Kalan

[21:31] What's the name that they give him in it?

Dan McCoy

[21:34] Well, wait.

Elliott Kalan

[21:36] They come up with a code name that they're going to call him.

Dan McCoy

[21:40] Oh, well, there's like a code name for like fans, like people in the fan club or something.

[21:44] It was like Broncos or something.

[21:45] I don't know what it was.

[21:46] I was like half paying attention because also Audrey was listening to like reels on her phone right next to me.

[21:56] There's always a competition for where my attention goes.

Elliott Kalan

[21:59] And I'm just trying to think of what other theme songs can have turds on the laptop.

[22:02] I wake up in the morning and there's turds on my laptop and I think I'll never make it on time.

Dan McCoy

[22:08] The laptop turd medley.

[22:11] Yeah.

[22:12] Okay.

[22:13] We're getting close.

[22:14] Some times you want to go where there are no turds on your laptop.

Elliott Kalan

[22:17] Whatever happened to the turds on your laptop?

[22:21] The milkman, the paperboy.

[22:23] The pooperboy.

[22:24] The pooperboy.

[22:25] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[22:29] There had to have been a review of the movie The Paperboy.

[22:32] That was the pooperboy.

Elliott Kalan

[22:33] There had to have been, Dan.

[22:35] There had to have been.

[22:36] Okay, gang.

[22:37] Scientifically.

[22:38] That does remember.

[22:39] I do.

[22:39] That does remember when my column that used to run in the Metro newspaper.

[22:42] Once it was next to a review of the Woody Allen movie Scoop and the headline was just Scoop is Poop.

Stuart Wellington

[22:50] Not wrong.

[22:51] Okay, guys.

[22:51] We are back.

[22:52] We have officially cut down this list of 75 movies to a trim 21 movies.

[23:00] Oh, okay.

[23:01] We should have been more brutal.

[23:01] Yeah, we should have cut more.

[23:02] We should have been more brutal, but this is a relatively simple thing.

[23:04] We don't have to make a huge case for these things.

[23:07] You simply have to give me a number rating between one and ten.

[23:10] One being the weakest, obvious.

[23:13] Ten being this is the best movie I've ever seen.

[23:16] Give it a million.

[23:16] Okay.

[23:17] And then we're going to average those out and obviously the – if there's – if you haven't seen it, you don't give it a score.

[23:26] You abstain.

[23:27] Yeah.

[23:27] So if there's a tie or –

Elliott Kalan

[23:28] Like Clarence Thomas should when his wife's organization comes up before him.

[23:33] But he doesn't because he's a corrupt piece of shit.

[23:35] That's true.

[23:36] Yeah.

[23:36] He has been a problem.

Stuart Wellington

[23:38] He's been a blight on the country and humanity for many years.

[23:42] So that counts – this now counts as a political podcast.

Elliott Kalan

[23:44] Hey, welcome to Floppo Flophouse.

[23:48] No, we're going to get audited.

[23:48] We were talking about Stephen King movies.

[23:50] Now we're talking about the Supreme Court.

[23:52] Okay.

[23:53] And obviously –

[23:54] Did you know the Supreme Court voted Carrie, Rage, Carrie 2 as the number one Stephen King movie?

[24:00] Once again, the Supreme Court is just not going by precedent.

[24:03] Anyway, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[24:04] Okay.

[24:04] The first up is The Monkey, Dan.

[24:06] What are you going to give The Monkey between one and ten?

Dan McCoy

[24:10] Oh, boy.

[24:10] I really like this one, but I know there's a lot.

[24:13] Six.

Stuart Wellington

[24:14] Okay, six.

[24:15] Elliot, did you see it?

Elliott Kalan

[24:16] I haven't seen it, no.

Stuart Wellington

[24:17] I'm going to give it a seven.

[24:18] I liked it a lot.

[24:19] I heard good things about it.

[24:20] The first It movie.

[24:22] Dan, what are you going to give it?

[24:24] Five.

[24:25] Five.

[24:26] Elliot?

[24:26] I'm also going to give it a five.

[24:28] Wow.

[24:29] I'm giving it a three.

Elliott Kalan

[24:30] I did not care for it.

Stuart Wellington

[24:31] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[24:33] We loved it.

[24:33] That's why we gave it a five out of ten.

Stuart Wellington

[24:36] I don't know why you took that as a personal story.

[24:38] I was simply trying to show off how much I liked it less than you guys.

[24:42] I see.

[24:43] Okay, so you guys had to be the yardstick.

[24:46] I'm going to call Gerald's Game.

[24:47] I like this one.

Elliott Kalan

[24:47] I liked it, but I'm going to give it a seven, I think.

Stuart Wellington

[24:50] Okay.

[24:50] I'm going to give it a six.

[24:52] Okay.

[24:53] And I liked it too.

[24:54] I'm going to give it a seven.

[24:55] Okay.

[24:56] 1408.

[24:57] Dan?

Dan McCoy

[25:00] Five.

Stuart Wellington

[25:01] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[25:02] Elliot, did you see this one?

[25:03] No, I never saw it.

[25:04] Again, I love the short story.

[25:05] I never saw the movie.

Stuart Wellington

[25:05] I'm also going to give it a five.

[25:07] I wanted to like it as much as the short story, and I did not, but it was still pretty good.

Elliott Kalan

[25:10] Do they do the thing where he picks up the phone and it's going, one, two, three, all your friends are dead?

Stuart Wellington

[25:14] Yes, I believe so.

[25:15] Yeah.

[25:15] That's great.

[25:16] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[25:18] The Mist.

[25:21] Now that we've been through a bunch of these, I'm going to also give it a five, I guess.

[25:26] Okay.

[25:27] Elliot?

Stuart Wellington

[25:27] I'll give it a six.

[25:30] You're going to give it a six.

[25:31] Okay.

[25:31] Was there anything about The Mist?

[25:34] I think we've talked about the ending.

[25:36] Did you both dislike the ending?

[25:37] I remember watching the theater and being like, this kind of sucks, but also I'm like, well, they went for it.

[25:43] I like that they did.

[25:44] I mean, that's the thing.

[25:45] I kind of felt similarly.

[25:46] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[25:46] I like that they did something different and they were like, well, let's make it real mean.

[25:50] But I honestly like the uncertainty of the novellas ending more.

Stuart Wellington

[25:58] Yeah.

[25:58] I mean, when I was, I remember discovering, discovering, discovering this short story or novella when I was a kid and being like, oh, wow, there's monsters in the mist.

[26:08] And that was, and like the idea that there's like, there could be a whole world of monsters running around that you can barely see.

[26:14] Like as a kid, I'm like, this is the coolest thing I've ever heard.

[26:17] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[26:17] And like there's, I mean, I, what I do like about the movie The Mist, I don't know, maybe I'm undervaluing it just because, you know, we've talked about.

[26:23] I'm going to give it a six as well.

[26:25] But it's like, it's a lot of cool monster stuff in there.

[26:28] Anyway.

Elliott Kalan

[26:29] I think, I mean, it's, I, it's, it's a fun kind of like, yeah, fun, cool thing for most of it.

[26:34] And then they're trying something.

[26:35] Yeah.

[26:36] You know, it doesn't quite come together.

Stuart Wellington

[26:42] I'm Graham Clark, co-host of Maximum Fund's Stop Podcasting Yourself.

[26:47] And I'm here with Max Fund member of the month, Matthew.

[26:51] Hello, Matthew.

[26:51] How are you?

[26:52] Hi, Graham.

[26:53] Thank you for supporting a thing that you love.

[26:55] That's something that you listen to.

[26:57] I do it as well.

[26:58] And I love being able to do that for the podcast that I listen to.

Dan McCoy

[27:02] Plus you're the kings of BOCO.

[27:04] Absolutely.

[27:05] We are.

[27:05] I appreciate seeing those coming in.

Stuart Wellington

[27:07] Now, do you know what your perks are for being the member of the month?

[27:11] I do.

Dan McCoy

[27:12] I mean, I get to talk to you, which is kind of the big thing.

[27:16] Of course, the.

[27:16] The best.

[27:19] The parking space.

[27:20] Yep.

[27:20] And I think there's $25 in the Max Fund shopping.

[27:24] And you also get a bumper sticker.

[27:26] Oh, bumper sticker.

Stuart Wellington

[27:28] Yeah.

[27:28] So is there anything else you'd like to add?

[27:30] Talking to other people out there that are maybe considering joining Maximum Fund.

Dan McCoy

[27:34] Knowing that you're supporting something that you like that brings value and happiness to a ton of people.

[27:40] That's a good feeling.

[27:41] You're fighting the good fight.

S4

[27:43] Support the shows you love, including this one.

[27:46] Check the show notes for a link or go to MaximumFun.org slash join.

[27:53] Hi, everybody.

[27:54] It's Ellen Weatherford.

Stuart Wellington

[27:55] And Christian Weatherford.

S4

[27:57] People say not to judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree.

Stuart Wellington

[28:00] But we can judge a snake by its ability to fly or a spider by its ability to dive.

S4

[28:06] Or a dung beetle by its ability to navigate with the starlight of the Milky Way galaxy.

Stuart Wellington

[28:11] On Just the Zoo of Us, we rate our favorite animals out of 10 in the categories of physical effectiveness, behavioral ingenuity, and of course, aesthetics.

S4

[28:18] Guest experts like biologists, ecologists, musicians, comedians, and more join us to share their unique insights into the animal kingdom.

Stuart Wellington

[28:27] Listen with the whole family on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get your podcasts.

Dan McCoy

[28:34] This podcast is brought to you in part by Squarespace, which gives you everything that you need to offer services online, get paid, everything that you want to do online.

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Elliott Kalan

[29:42] Hey, we're also sponsored by HIMSS.

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[31:27] We also have a Jumbotron this week.

[31:31] Jumbotron.

[31:31] Thank you.

[31:32] Jumbotron.

[31:32] Very exciting.

[31:33] And this Jumbotron is for Sarah and Faragel, and it comes from Mikey and Dylan.

[31:39] And the message is thus.

[31:41] You're getting married.

[31:42] Your favorite North Inishoen brothers can't wait to party with you South Inishoen bozos in Derry this May.

[31:48] Hope Elliot's dulcet tones, thank you, make up for not getting your playlist done yet.

[31:52] But hopefully the peaches can recommend some tracks to cover us and manifest a rah-rah for your powerfully thick cat, Magnus.

[32:00] Love yous.

[32:01] It's very sweet.

[32:02] It's always nice when people get married.

Dan McCoy

[32:03] You're supposed to come up with some playlist tracks?

[32:06] Or what kind of?

[32:08] Oh, I don't know.

Elliott Kalan

[32:09] Dan, I know what playlist track you're going to recommend for a wedding, and that's This Must Be the Play's Naive Melody by Talking Heads.

[32:15] No, that's true.

[32:15] What a sweet song that is.

[32:16] What a sweet wedding song that is.

[32:17] It is a very sweet song.

Dan McCoy

[32:19] Thank you.

[32:20] Thank you for covering me.

Elliott Kalan

[32:22] No problem.

[32:23] I'm also going to recommend, let's see, what's another?

[32:26] This is a similar song to that one, which is Sherlock Holmes by Sparks.

[32:30] I'm still thinking like Dan McCoy here, which is a song that's partly about Sherlock Holmes, but it's also about finding love even though you are not Sherlock Holmes.

Stuart Wellington

[32:39] Yeah, and I'd probably recommend Smooth Up In You by the Bullet Boys.

[32:43] Okay, sure.

Dan McCoy

[32:47] So put all those on there, I guess.

[32:48] I guess put those on the playlist.

[32:49] I think you had a few personal plugs before we got back to the show.

Elliott Kalan

[32:53] I've just got the regular batch of personal plugs I'd like to mention.

[32:56] My new comic book, Barbarian Behind Bars, is out now from Mad Cave Studios.

[33:00] Check out the latest issue.

[33:01] It is about a Conan the Barbarian type barbarian who ends up on Earth, gets thrown in jail.

[33:06] He doesn't speak the language.

[33:07] No one knows who he is.

[33:07] He's got to fight his way out.

[33:09] But maybe, just maybe, the evil that he was chasing to our world is out to get him at the same time.

[33:15] And there's some funny stuff in the two.

[33:16] Maybe.

[33:17] Definitely.

[33:18] Let me just tell you, it definitely is.

[33:19] Also, I continue to come out with Harley Quinn for DC Comics.

[33:23] I think that my Bat Quinn storyline is still going on.

[33:26] It's called The Hark Knight Returns, where Harley Quinn has been split into two.

[33:29] And one of those two is essentially her version of The Dark Knight from Dark Knight Returns.

[33:34] And I had a lot of fun writing it.

[33:36] My book, Joke Farming, How to Write Comedy and Other Nonsense, is still out now from the University of Chicago Press.

[33:41] I just finished recording the audiobook of it.

[33:44] So that will be released at some point.

[33:46] So get ready to hear me read my book.

[33:48] If you don't want to, read me read my book.

[33:53] And that's what I got.

[33:54] Stu, do you have any personal stuff you'd like to plug?

Stuart Wellington

[33:56] I mean, I would always recommend going over to Jiggle Studios and signing up for a class if you're here in New York.

[34:02] And if you're not, they have a link on the website to some merch if you want to show off and get some cool fitness gear and show off your support of a cool little small fitness studio.

[34:17] Now we got The Green Mile.

[34:19] Green Mile, three hours long, by the way.

[34:23] I'm not.

[34:24] That's a long walk.

[34:26] Oh!

[34:27] Yeah!

Dan McCoy

[34:30] It's a perfectly pleasant movie, but I'm more of a five for this.

Elliott Kalan

[34:34] Oh, I like The Green Mile.

[34:35] I haven't seen it in years, but I think I'm going to give it an eight.

Stuart Wellington

[34:40] Wow.

[34:40] I'll give it a six just because, though I liked it, I thought it was a little long.

[34:46] It is a little long.

[34:48] We got Apt Pupil.

[34:51] Apt Pupil.

Elliott Kalan

[34:52] Oh, this is rough.

[34:53] Again.

Stuart Wellington

[34:53] So as we said, part of the problem here is this was directed by Bryan Singer, right?

Elliott Kalan

[34:57] Directed by Bryan Singer.

[34:58] Even at the time, there were allegations that some of the underage male actors were mistreated, were told to do scenes in the nude.

[35:09] I remember reading when the movie came out, Entertainment Weekly did an article about this.

[35:13] And looking back on it, it's surprising that Bryan Singer then went on to make more and bigger movies after what happened on the set of that movie.

[35:21] So it's a little hard to –

Stuart Wellington

[35:21] Was this before or after Usual Suspects?

Elliott Kalan

[35:24] This was, I think, after Usual Suspects, but before X-Men, I believe.

[35:27] Before X-Men, yeah.

[35:28] And I think it was – it helped that I think everyone thought X-Men was going to be a huge flop and a nothing, that they had him do it.

[35:39] Yeah, Usual Suspects was 95, Apt Pupil was 98, and then X-Men was 2000.

[35:43] So it was off of Usual Suspects.

Stuart Wellington

[35:45] I got to say the saddest thing about it is I hadn't heard all the stories about this filming, but that makes me more concerned about Ian McKellen, Suri and McKellen.

[35:55] More concerned about what?

[35:57] Well, that Suri and McKellen would have been okay with it.

[36:00] I mean, who knows what –

[36:01] The thing is he was not involved in those – he was also not involved in those scenes.

[36:03] Yeah, you're right.

[36:03] He may not have been aware of it until afterwards.

Elliott Kalan

[36:06] But I just want Gandalf to step in and save the day as well.

[36:08] Yes, I understand.

[36:09] My guess is that Ian McKellen was not aware of those things until after the film was made because he's not in any of those scenes.

[36:16] These were all – there was a scene where – that involved like a boy's locker room.

[36:19] He did keep working with Bryan Singer though.

[36:22] He did start as Magneto.

[36:23] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[36:24] Anyway, we're getting away from the rating thing.

Elliott Kalan

[36:26] And then he played Freddie Mercury, right?

Dan McCoy

[36:28] Yes, he did.

[36:29] On the – purely on the movie itself and none of the other stuff.

[36:34] I'm going four.

Stuart Wellington

[36:36] Oh, wow.

[36:36] I liked it more than that.

[36:37] Really?

[36:38] That low?

[36:38] I'm going to say a seven.

Elliott Kalan

[36:39] Because on the movie itself I would say a seven also, yeah.

[36:42] Okay.

[36:42] I mean partly because Ian McKellen's performance is great in it.

[36:45] Yeah.

[36:45] That scene where he keeps – he makes him – the kid makes him wear the uniform and he starts saluting and stomping his heels and the kid's like, okay, stop, stop.

[36:55] And he won't stop doing it.

[36:56] It's a pretty – that's a pretty intense scene.

[36:57] Yeah.

[36:58] But again, the man who made It's a Monster, you know.

[37:00] Yep.

[37:01] No movie, even if it was a 10 out of 10, justifies mistreatment of the people making the movie, you know.

[37:07] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[37:09] We have Dolores Claiborne next.

[37:12] Guys, I actually haven't seen Dolores Claiborne.

[37:14] Dolores Claiborne?

[37:15] This is the first in this batch that I have not seen at all.

[37:18] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[37:18] You know, Dolores Claiborne is – it's okay.

[37:21] It's pretty good, but it's not that amazing.

[37:23] You know?

[37:23] What do you think, Dan?

[37:24] It's like – it's a solid movie.

Dan McCoy

[37:26] Yeah.

[37:26] Well, that's why – I'm going to give it a five, but that's on the scale of like we've already called the bad movies and now this is just levels of good.

[37:35] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[37:36] I'm going to give it a six because five still feels lowish to me.

[37:40] Okay.

[37:41] Next up is The Shawshank Redemption.

[37:44] This is a big one, guys.

[37:45] Even if – look, even if this is not your favorite movie or whatever, I still – it's still a really good movie.

[37:50] I'm going to give this a – I'm going to – on the scale of Stephen King movies, I'm giving it a 10.

[37:57] It is not a 10 movie compared to other greatest movies.

[38:00] But I think when it comes to Stephen King movies, I think this is – especially for a non-horror one, this is about as good as it gets.

Stuart Wellington

[38:06] On some level, this movie is undeniable in that way.

[38:09] Yes.

[38:09] Like this is a part of – it has become a part of culture.

[38:12] It has – and it has received a certain amount of backlash, not unlike, say, Forrest Gump, for instance.

[38:18] I would say it is less deserving of it than Forrest Gump.

[38:21] Well, I think – that's the thing.

Elliott Kalan

[38:22] I think there's a – there was such a – I'm going to be a part of the backlash to the backlash because I feel like – I think it's a really good movie.

[38:29] Does it deserve to be – for years it was number one on the IMDb top 250 movies?

[38:33] Of course not.

[38:35] Of course it doesn't.

[38:35] Yeah.

[38:36] It's not even in the top – I don't think it would even be in the top 250 movies ever made.

Stuart Wellington

[38:39] It should just be in the top, like, top movie that a dad will stop if he sees it on TV, stand next to the couch and watch the rest of it.

[38:48] I mean it's the number one of those for sure.

Dan McCoy

[38:50] This is my – I mean like I'm just going to – my feeling is like it is the epitome of like really beautifully, solidly crafted, old-fashioned, like a movie that's going to make you feel things.

[39:04] You're going to be engrossed by it.

[39:05] But it isn't like touched with genius or anything.

[39:08] No.

[39:08] So that's why I'm going to give it an eight.

[39:09] I think that's true.

Elliott Kalan

[39:10] Okay.

[39:10] I think you can – I'm going to give it a ten if only because I think even a movie that is that craftsmanlike and just does the job.

[39:18] Yeah.

[39:18] Is something that can be wonderful, you know?

[39:20] But I think – but it's also me making a statement that like we don't have to shit on it because idiots think it's a great movie.

Stuart Wellington

[39:27] Sometimes idiots are right occasionally.

[39:30] Yes.

[39:30] I would – I'm going to give it an eight as well.

[39:33] And part of that is because I feel like a lot of what makes this movie click I feel like was kind of adopted from Stand By Me.

[39:44] That somebody – that the filmmakers were like, I want to – like Stephen King is latched onto this.

[39:49] I'm going to do basically the same thing.

[39:51] Yeah.

[39:52] Okay.

[39:53] Still very high score on this one.

[39:56] We got the dark half.

Elliott Kalan

[39:59] Timothy Hutton.

Stuart Wellington

[40:01] Playing two parts.

Elliott Kalan

[40:02] It's like not as good as it should be.

[40:05] Yeah.

[40:05] It's still pretty fun.

[40:07] Yeah.

[40:08] It should be a better movie.

Stuart Wellington

[40:09] I'm going to give it a – I'm going to give it a five.

[40:11] I'm giving it a four.

[40:12] Okay.

[40:13] I'm going to give it a five also.

[40:15] Misery.

[40:16] We got Jimmy Conn.

[40:18] We got Kathy Bates.

Dan McCoy

[40:20] I like Misery a lot.

[40:21] It never like clicked for me the way like some people really love Misery.

[40:26] So I'm going to give it a seven.

Stuart Wellington

[40:27] I think it's because you have never loved a creator so much that if you had them, you would capture them and chop their feet off.

[40:36] It's true.

[40:37] I have never felt that way.

Elliott Kalan

[40:39] Must be nice.

[40:40] I'm going to give it an eight.

[40:42] I think it's really good.

[40:43] But I wish it was a little – at times I wish it was a little scarier.

[40:46] Yeah.

[40:47] But having been on both sides of that, having been a rabid fan and also having had people I cannot shake.

[40:55] I think it's really good.

[40:56] So I'm going to call it an eight.

Stuart Wellington

[40:58] So what was your –

[40:59] I've seen clouds from both sides now.

[41:00] Seven.

[41:01] Seven.

[41:01] I am also going to give it a seven.

[41:04] Tales from the Dark Side, the movie.

[41:08] I don't think I ever saw this.

[41:09] I think I've only ever seen the TV show.

Dan McCoy

[41:11] I mean only one section of it is a Stephen King thing.

[41:14] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[41:14] But that section does feature Buster Poindexter.

Dan McCoy

[41:17] True.

[41:17] And William Hickey.

Stuart Wellington

[41:18] And William Hickey.

[41:19] Two stars of the silver screen.

[41:21] They are.

[41:22] Classic stars.

[41:23] They are at that.

Elliott Kalan

[41:24] I mean and Buster Poindexter is also a star of the rock and roll stage.

[41:27] You know.

Dan McCoy

[41:28] Yeah.

[41:29] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[41:30] He was a hot, hot, hot star.

[41:32] A real New York doll.

[41:33] He's a real – he is literally a real New York doll.

[41:37] I remember our mutual friend Devin Coleman either tweeting or something about like – he was like, holy shit, I just learned Buster Poindexter was not a real person.

Stuart Wellington

[41:51] I'm going to give this one a four.

Dan McCoy

[41:52] I'm going to give it a four too.

[41:53] I like it a little bit more than that.

[41:56] But it's not really a Stephen King movie I feel like.

Elliott Kalan

[41:59] I do like Bill Hickey though.

[42:01] I'll watch this by anything he's in.

[42:03] So maybe I'll have to watch it.

Dan McCoy

[42:04] And I like our college – early friend Bill Hickey.

Stuart Wellington

[42:08] Yep.

[42:08] I mean he's an adult now.

[42:11] But he was – he went to college.

[42:13] I'm just saying wow, we know him.

Elliott Kalan

[42:14] Not as much of an adult as William Hickey, Bill Hickey the actor who was old since he was born.

[42:19] Yeah.

[42:20] What's crazy about Bill Hickey.

[42:22] So he was only 70 when he died.

[42:24] He seemed like he was 85 years old for most of his life.

[42:27] Yes.

[42:28] It's astonishing.

Dan McCoy

[42:29] Yeah.

[42:30] The raspiest man in Hollywood.

Stuart Wellington

[42:34] Yeah.

[42:35] Him and Tom Cruise.

[42:36] Same type of guy.

[42:38] Same age.

[42:39] Same age.

[42:40] Okay.

[42:40] So we got Pet Sematary.

[42:43] This movie of course was inspired by the hit song by The Ramones.

[42:49] It was indeed.

[42:50] It was written for Pet Sematary too.

Elliott Kalan

[42:54] There was a big rights battle between the Ramones and the Pet Sematary people so they didn't settle it until the second movie.

Dan McCoy

[43:02] I'm not sure how good this movie is in certain ways but in other ways like it is one of the most like straight up scary of the Stephen King movies.

[43:11] So I'm going to give it a six.

[43:12] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[43:13] I remember as a kid renting it and being like viscerally horrified by large chunks of it.

[43:19] I think I'm also going to give it a six.

[43:20] Yeah.

[43:21] Six, six, six.

[43:22] Okay.

[43:23] Oh no.

[43:23] The original The Running Man starring our boy Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Elliott Kalan

[43:29] This is a movie.

[43:30] If you had asked me when I was a younger man, I would have been like four.

[43:34] But now I really appreciate this kind of stuff much more.

[43:37] And I think I might give this one a seven, guys.

[43:41] Yeah.

[43:41] Like it is not amazing as an action movie.

[43:45] It's not amazing as a story.

[43:46] But it's the kind of satire that is hitting you so hard in the face that like it just gleefully being like get it.

[43:52] You get the point we're making.

[43:54] You understand it, right?

[43:55] And I really appreciate that.

Stuart Wellington

[43:56] Guys, I'm going to give it an eight if only because it has some of the craziest, dumbest one-liners.

[44:03] It's like – it's incredible.

[44:05] Like it's almost like you couldn't replicate it.

[44:07] And clearly Edgar Wright couldn't.

Dan McCoy

[44:09] I kind of hate to be the spoiler here, but I cannot let this stand.

[44:13] I'm going to give it a five.

[44:15] Cannot let it stand.

Elliott Kalan

[44:16] Stand game reference.

[44:18] I think Richard Dawson is so fun in it.

[44:20] Come on.

[44:20] Yeah, he's great.

[44:20] The idea that Arnold Schwarzenegger is the everyman who's caught up in the situation.

[44:25] You're just mad that it doesn't have the original ending from the book where he at one point he has to make his way up to a cockpit of a plane,

[44:32] but his intestines are hanging out and they get snagged on the seats.

[44:35] Yeah, pretty great.

[44:36] It's pretty great.

[44:37] Do they do that in the new one or no?

Stuart Wellington

[44:39] They get closer to it.

[44:41] Yeah, they get closer to it, but it's enough where you're like, come on.

[44:44] You know Werner Herzog was watching and was like, you are a coward.

Elliott Kalan

[44:50] What is the point of making an adaptation of The Running Man without having his guts hanging?

[44:55] He's getting out and being snagged on by the airplane seat.

[44:57] It's getting very Scottish as you go along.

[44:58] Guys, speaking of Werner Herzog.

[45:01] Oh, excuse me, Werner Herzog.

Stuart Wellington

[45:02] Guys, speaking of Werner Herzog, I keep seeing the ads for the new Star Wars movie, The Mandalorian and Grogu.

[45:08] Who the fuck's Grogu?

[45:09] He's always hanging out with Baby Yoda.

[45:11] Why isn't Baby Yoda in the title?

[45:13] Oh, Stuart.

[45:14] Stuart.

[45:14] Oh, Stuart.

[45:15] That is the true cowardice of the Star Wars universe.

[45:18] They weren't just like, let's just call him Baby Yoda.

[45:22] If they called him Baby Yoda, I'd be like, right there.

[45:26] I know that's not his fucking name, but his name should be Baby Yoda.

[45:29] It's funny.

[45:30] It would be way funnier.

Elliott Kalan

[45:32] Instead of the more dignified Grogu.

[45:35] Thank you.

[45:36] For a while, I thought it was called The Mandalorian and Go-Gurt.

[45:39] And I was like, when you're wearing a helmet, you got to be able to squeeze something through the slot.

Stuart Wellington

[45:43] And if anyone ever calls Baby Yoda the child, I immediately stop paying attention to them.

[45:49] They have lost all credibility in my eyes.

[45:52] Okay, so we have Creepshow 2, guys.

[45:55] I got to say I'm giving it a 9.

[45:57] What?

[45:58] Okay, well.

[45:59] No, I'll give it an 8, Dan.

[46:00] I know that the first section sucks.

Dan McCoy

[46:02] Yeah, the one with the drugstore.

Stuart Wellington

[46:06] Yes, I know that sucks.

[46:08] Yeah.

[46:09] But the raft is good.

[46:11] And again, my mom insisted that I watch this movie.

[46:16] She's like, this last section with the hitchhiker is so funny.

[46:20] And I watched it.

[46:21] I can't even remember it.

[46:22] What happens?

[46:23] It's like a woman is like racing home after cheating on her husband.

[46:26] And she like hits a homeless guy on the road.

[46:32] And then she leaves him.

[46:36] And then she keeps driving.

[46:37] And then he shows up again.

[46:38] She hits him again.

[46:39] And he keeps like haunting her.

[46:41] And he keeps saying, thanks for the ride, lady.

[46:43] And my mom is like, that's so funny.

[46:45] And I'm watching it as a kid.

[46:46] I'm like, this is the worst thing I've ever seen, mom.

[46:48] Why do you make me watch this?

Dan McCoy

[46:49] Well, I love how much you – this is a treasured memory of your mother.

[46:54] But other than the raft, nothing is memorable about this movie to me.

[46:58] So I'm going to give it a 4.

Stuart Wellington

[46:59] Okay.

[46:59] I'm going to give it a 3.

[47:01] Ooh, wow.

[47:02] Okay.

[47:02] Well, it's still hanging in there.

[47:03] It's still above Tales from the Dark Side, the movie.

[47:06] Just because there's beef between me and Stuart's mom.

[47:08] Yeah, that's fine.

[47:09] Shelley knows what she did.

[47:12] Okay.

[47:12] Next is – here's a big one.

[47:14] Stand By Me, which I recently rewatched when Rob Ryan –

[47:17] How did it hold up on rewatch?

Elliott Kalan

[47:18] Because I haven't watched this in years.

[47:20] I haven't seen it in a long time.

[47:20] It's really good.

[47:22] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[47:22] Yeah, this – I mean this – I wouldn't have made the connection, but this for me is hitting the like Stephen King like note that Shawshank comes very, very close to but doesn't quite do as well for me.

[47:34] Like I would give this a 9.

[47:36] I like this one a lot.

Elliott Kalan

[47:38] I'm going to give it a – you know, I haven't watched it in years.

[47:40] I'm going to give it a 10 also because it was such a big movie for me and my family when I was a kid.

[47:46] We watched it all the time and it was like watching a movie that felt like it was for a kid but it felt like – it felt like the movie equivalent of the kid saying, do you want to go see A Dead Body of the Train Tracks?

[47:57] Come with me.

[47:58] I'm going to show you something adults don't want you to see.

[48:00] But it's still – it's a rite of passage.

[48:01] So, you know, I'll give it a 10 also.

[48:02] I'll be generous.

[48:03] I'm being generous in this episode.

Stuart Wellington

[48:04] Yeah, I'm going to give this one a 9 because it's – exactly.

[48:09] I think you put it perfectly into words, Elliot.

[48:11] It is this feeling of like this is a story for kids that is adult in a lot of ways, not the least of which is that it doesn't have some kind of clear like perfect resolution.

Elliott Kalan

[48:23] Yeah, there's no – yeah, there's – I remember watching it and being like I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be feeling about what happened with those kids or what they learned.

[48:31] And also I don't think I've ever fully understood the meaning of the whole barf story, but I love it.

[48:35] Come on.

[48:35] They're all throwing up all over each other.

[48:36] Come on.

Stuart Wellington

[48:37] The – and the – it really captures one of the things that I like about Stephen King's stories, which is that teenagers are terrifying.

[48:47] Like teenagers, mainly teenage boys, are like sociopaths that like –

Dan McCoy

[48:52] I'm going to push us through this round because we have another recording coming up that –

[48:57] Okay.

[48:58] We're almost done.

[48:58] We only have a few left.

Elliott Kalan

[48:59] I will just say one last thing about it is that in Dreamcatcher, there's that scene where they're teens and they like go up against those teen bullies.

[49:04] And I'm like this all feels so fake.

[49:06] And stand by me.

[49:07] You're right, Stuart.

[49:07] It has that kind of scene, but it feels real.

[49:09] Like it feels dangerous.

[49:10] Like these kids are in trouble.

Stuart Wellington

[49:11] Because it's got Kiefer in it.

[49:14] We got Christine.

[49:15] Christine.

[49:16] Dan.

[49:18] Five.

[49:19] I'm going to give it a five also.

[49:21] I've actually never seen Christine.

[49:22] Wow.

[49:24] The Dead Zone.

[49:26] Oh, man.

[49:27] This is –

[49:28] Mainly what I like about it is that it is predicted that a presidential candidate, if it is shitty enough, will not get elected.

Elliott Kalan

[49:35] Yeah.

[49:35] And will then kill himself.

[49:37] Yeah.

[49:37] Out of shame.

[49:38] This is a 10 for me.

[49:40] He does hold up a baby to block an assassin's bullet.

[49:43] So, I mean, it's pretty bad what he did.

[49:46] Yeah, I'm going to give that a 10 also.

[49:48] If you're going to ask me again, against all movies in the world –

[49:51] I'm giving it a nine.

[49:51] It's really good.

[49:52] Against all movies in the world, I'd probably give it an eight.

[49:55] Okay.

[49:55] Against Stephen King movies, it gets a 10.

Stuart Wellington

[49:57] Original Creepshow.

Dan McCoy

[50:01] Not entirely consistent.

[50:04] Like, it has its flaws, but it's such a loving homage to what it is.

[50:11] I'm going to give it an eight.

Elliott Kalan

[50:13] I'm going to give it, I think, a six.

[50:15] I've never really liked it that much.

[50:17] I'm giving it an eight.

Stuart Wellington

[50:18] I agree with Dan that it's such a clear, loving homage to that sort of thing.

[50:25] And I love the little animated comic book pages and shit.

[50:28] Sure, that's fun.

[50:29] Yeah.

[50:29] Okay, The Shining.

[50:33] One.

[50:34] Just kidding.

[50:35] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[50:36] I'm going to give that a 10 also.

[50:38] That's a super scary movie.

[50:39] That's one of the few movies on this list where I'm like, oh, I find it genuinely frightening when I watch it.

[50:44] Yeah.

[50:44] Like, I'm actually scared by it.

Stuart Wellington

[50:46] I'll give it a 10 as well.

Elliott Kalan

[50:47] Most Stephen King movies, I'm like, that's all right.

[50:49] It's getting 10s across the board.

[50:50] 10s.

[50:51] 10s across the board.

[50:53] We don't have to be iconoclasts.

[50:54] It's okay for us to say that the Stanley Kubrick movie is a great movie.

[50:58] Yeah.

[50:58] Like, we don't have to be the guys who are like, actually, it's not that good.

Dan McCoy

[51:01] And finally, we have Carrie.

[51:04] Just a notch below for me.

[51:07] It's a nine.

[51:07] Like, it doesn't – I mean, I think this is maybe just like the story rather than – other than the iconic ending.

[51:16] There's nothing in it that like really scares me, but it's so like sweeping and well-made.

Elliott Kalan

[51:23] Yeah.

[51:23] I'm going to give it a nine just because I think it is on purpose, but the middle section of that movie you could call high school memories and just run it as it is.

[51:30] But it is – and it goes on a little long for me, but it's – the scare scenes especially work so well.

[51:36] And that ending scene, I know exactly what's going to happen, and I jump every time because it takes so long for her arm to come out of that grave that I'm like, I know it's going to happen.

[51:44] It's going to happen now.

[51:45] Oh, it didn't happen yet?

[51:46] Oh, it just happened.

Stuart Wellington

[51:47] Yeah, and that's like – it's like the gold standard for that.

[51:52] Yes.

[51:52] Yes, exactly.

[51:53] I got to give it a nine for that exact same reason.

[51:55] Okay, so this is it.

[51:56] We got our top ten.

[51:59] I'm going to read them in descending order because I don't want to try and mess around here.

[52:04] So our number one here –

[52:06] We wouldn't want to mess around and put them in ascending order.

[52:09] I just can't – like don't make me do math.

[52:11] Extra math here.

[52:13] Okay.

[52:14] So our number one is The Shining, of course.

[52:18] It's great.

[52:20] Our second place is The Dead Zone.

[52:25] No huge surprise.

[52:26] Very good.

[52:27] Yeah.

[52:27] Third is Stand By Me.

[52:29] Yep.

[52:29] Again, no surprises on the list.

[52:31] The scariest of the movies.

[52:32] Being a kid.

[52:34] Because it could happen.

[52:36] Carrie is number four.

[52:39] We go down to Shawshank at number five.

[52:42] Kind of a surprise that it's so low, but that's still a very respectable placement.

Elliott Kalan

[52:47] But that top four, that top four is a pretty –

[52:49] Yeah.

[52:50] It's a pretty strong top four.

Dan McCoy

[52:51] It's out of what, 80 movies?

[52:53] It really started originally.

Elliott Kalan

[52:54] Yeah, it is in the top five out of like 75 or 80 movies.

Stuart Wellington

[52:58] We have a tie for sixth place.

[53:02] And I'm going to say – yeah, I think it's an even Steven tie is Misery and Creepshow, both at six.

[53:11] Very similar movies.

[53:13] Yeah, the tone is –

[53:14] Both about writing.

[53:16] So eighth place would then be –

[53:18] Both about storytelling.

[53:20] Yep.

[53:21] Eighth place would be down to – it looks like we have another tie between The Running Man and Gerald's Game.

[53:29] Much higher than I expected for both of them to be.

[53:31] Yes.

[53:31] But they're both – I think they're both very strong additions to the catalog.

Elliott Kalan

[53:35] Once you see how much crap is in the Stephen King adaptation filmography, you get less surprised.

Stuart Wellington

[53:42] Yeah.

[53:42] And then weirdly enough –

[53:43] How many children's of the corn there are.

[53:46] And then it looks like –

[53:49] Wear a condom corn.

[53:50] This one kind of –

[53:51] This one's kind of a –

[53:52] You've got enough kids, right?

[53:53] This one's a recent addition that is brought up largely is –

[53:59] Oh, exclusively because of Dan and Stuart because Elliot hasn't seen it is The Monkey, the Oz Perkins movie.

[54:04] I've got to see it.

[54:04] A movie that many –

Dan McCoy

[54:05] Many people –

[54:06] Was not particularly well liked.

[54:08] Very mixed.

[54:08] Many people dismissed it, but yeah.

[54:10] I was with Stuart.

[54:11] It was like his birthday movie.

[54:12] It was my birthday movie.

[54:14] We were, as Stuart likes to say, hooting and hollering.

[54:16] It was a lot of fun.

Elliott Kalan

[54:17] And I imagine, Dan, that you walked out of that movie and turned to Stuart and you said,

[54:19] That was Os Great Perkins.

Stuart Wellington

[54:21] Well, the thing is, I think he –

[54:24] Dan said that and I was, again, ancient and ancient.

[54:28] But the thing about Osgood Perkins movies is that I feel like all of his movies,

[54:35] you have to accept that it's operating on some level of like kind of dream logic.

[54:40] And I feel like by leaning into the – like the wackiness it – and the like dark comedy of it,

[54:48] I think it really worked for me.

[54:50] Also, any movie – any way that they make Theo and James not like – they expressly try to make him not sexy,

[54:58] I found very funny because he's a very sexy man.

Elliott Kalan

[55:01] I've got to watch – only Osgood Perkins movie I've seen is Long Legs, which I thought was okay.

Stuart Wellington

[55:06] But again, operates like – I think it works best when you're like – it's like this is – does this make sense?

[55:11] Okay, so that was lovely, guys.

[55:14] So we have crowned a winner in our Stephen King.

[55:19] Wow.

[55:20] Top ten, of course, that is Stanley Kubrick's The Shining.

[55:23] And again, let us let you know that under no circumstance, no movie,

[55:28] no movie is so good that it encourages you to mistreat your cast and or crew.

Elliott Kalan

[55:34] I mean, that's true.

[55:34] We talked about that with that pupil.

[55:36] The Shining was another example of mistreatment of cast.

[55:39] And that's something we shouldn't – that we shouldn't gloss over.

[55:42] But you're right.

[55:43] It does not justify – the movie being so scary does not justify Shelley Duvall being treated horribly on the set of that movie.

[55:48] By most accounts, right?

[55:50] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[55:51] Okay.

[55:52] So that was a mini for The Flophouse.

[55:55] This is a show on MaxFun.

[55:58] Thank you so much for supporting us.

[56:00] And if you want to listen to great shows like this one, you can go over to MaximumFun.org.

[56:06] And this show has been produced and edited lovingly by Howell Doughty, a.k.a. Alex Smith.

[56:12] He's the best.

[56:14] And for The Flophouse, I've been Stuart Wellington.

[56:16] I've been Dan McCoy.

Elliott Kalan

[56:17] I've been Elliot Spooky Kalin.

[56:20] Does that work as my new nickname for – it's not Halloween time.

[56:23] How about Elliot Kinglin?

[56:25] Yeah, this is Elliot Kinglin joining you for this.

Stuart Wellington

[56:30] Stuart Langoliersington?

[56:33] Yeah.

[56:33] And Daniel Kingerk McCoy.

[56:36] Uh-huh.

[56:37] Oh, okay.

[56:38] Or Daniel McKinney?

[56:39] It's Daniel McCujo.

[56:41] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[56:42] That's what it is.

[56:43] All right.

[56:44] Bye.

[56:47] How are my levels?

[56:51] I'm sitting slightly further away.

Dan McCoy

[56:52] No, I cranked you up a little bit to, I hope, compensate.

[56:55] Yanked is cranked.

[56:56] I'll put it up just a hair more, too.

Stuart Wellington

[56:58] I've been – all right.

[56:59] Now that I'm married, I'd love to get my cranky yanked.

Elliott Kalan

[57:03] That's a little Rodney Dangerfield.

[57:04] Just yanked.

[57:05] Just a little.

[57:05] That's like a T-shirt.

[57:06] Just a tiny bit.

[57:07] Yeah, that's Rodney Dangerish.

[57:08] I mean, I'm higher.

Stuart Wellington

[57:10] That's a danger field and more –

[57:12] That's Rodney Caution.

[57:13] Yeah.

[57:13] Now that I'm married, I want a handjob.

[57:16] More of a danger patch.

[57:17] Now that I'm married, I'd like somebody to be nice to me for a change.

Elliott Kalan

[57:21] Hey, being married, I don't get a lot of affection or sex from my wife.

Dan McCoy

[57:26] Rodney, no subtext.

[57:28] Dangerfield.

Elliott Kalan

[57:30] Okay, guys.

[57:31] Hey, I get no respect.

[57:33] People don't respect me.

[57:34] I have a deficit of respect.

[57:36] My actions are not met with approbation or dignity.

[57:40] Wow.

[57:41] He's very well spoken at this point in his career.

[57:43] This is Rodney Samuel Johnson.

[57:46] Well, this is after he went back to school.

[57:48] He did go back to school.

[57:51] Hey, I got slightly more respect ever since I got my degree.

Dan McCoy

[57:55] It's too bad we don't have outtakes on these ones.

[57:57] You could put one in, Alex.

[57:58] If you love this stuff.

[57:59] It's no long answer.

Elliott Kalan

[58:00] We can do whatever we want.

[58:01] Stick it on the other thing.

[58:04] Stick it on the other thing.

[58:05] I asked my wife what I should do.

[58:07] She said, stick it on the other thing.

[58:12] A worker-owned network.

Dan McCoy

[58:14] Of artist-owned shows.

[58:16] Supported.

[58:17] Directly.

[58:18] By you.

FH Mini #150 - Best Stephen King Movies

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