FH Mini 106 - Birthday Twins

Dan McCoy

[0:00] Hey everyone and welcome to a Flophouse mini.

[0:07] That's what we do every other week on the Flophouse.

[0:09] We're not talking about a bad movie.

[0:11] We do minis.

[0:12] So named because they're mostly shorter than regular episodes.

[0:16] Basically, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[0:17] And they're a little more freeform.

Dan McCoy

[0:19] Today I'm in the driver's seat.

[0:22] Buckle up.

[0:23] Is the game master in town?

[0:24] Well, maybe.

[0:25] Could be.

Elliott Kalan

[0:25] Either you want to buckle up or you want to stay unbuckled so you can leap out the window

[0:29] at the right moment.

[0:30] Yeah, yeah.

[0:31] Remember to roll when you hit the ground.

Stuart Wellington

[0:32] Yeah, if you hit the ground at a specific angle, you will explode.

[0:36] Wow.

[0:37] Yeah, I heard it.

[0:38] This kid in my school told me about a guy he knew that it happened to.

[0:40] Just saying.

Elliott Kalan

[0:42] That sounds like my younger son has been telling me how his friend told him that when you're

[0:47] counting, it goes up to Google and then it starts over again at zero.

[0:50] And that's how numbers work.

[0:51] And I was like, no, that's not how they work.

[0:53] He gets so mad.

Dan McCoy

[0:55] He was mad that he was misled?

Stuart Wellington

[0:57] No, he was mad at me for saying that his friend Rooster is wrong.

[1:02] Yeah, Dan's Googling this information.

Dan McCoy

[1:04] I mean, isn't that the way it is in life?

[1:08] Like someone tells you a true thing and you're mad that you can no longer believe the fantasy.

[1:14] Exactly.

[1:16] On that note, let's go into the mini.

[1:18] It starts like this.

[1:20] It starts right now.

[1:21] You know, tomorrow, as we record this, tomorrow is my Dan McCoy's birthday.

[1:27] What?

[1:27] Very exciting.

[1:29] It is the same.

[1:30] Happy 6-0.

Stuart Wellington

[1:31] Glad I remembered again.

[1:34] You don't need to.

Dan McCoy

[1:36] It's fine.

[1:37] Wait, no, I brought something.

Elliott Kalan

[1:39] Stuart's going through his pockets.

[1:41] You're coming.

[1:42] He took his shoes off and he was shaking them to see if anything comes out.

[1:45] You're coming to my birthday celebrations.

Dan McCoy

[1:47] That's enough for me.

[1:50] Yeah, what'll fall out of my shoes that I can give to Dan?

[1:53] Anyway, my birthday, of course, is the same as Garfield's.

[1:58] June 19, 1978.

[2:01] Juneteenth also.

[2:02] Sure.

[2:03] Dan's birthday is a federal holiday?

[2:05] But that's not a birthday.

[2:08] My birthday is the same.

[2:09] It's the birth of freedom.

[2:11] That's true.

[2:13] But a new birth of freedom.

[2:14] To the year, to the year, Garfield the cat, whom we all know and love from the comics pages,

[2:21] is the same.

[2:22] I mean, Nermal doesn't love.

Stuart Wellington

[2:23] Well, Nermal probably still loves it.

Dan McCoy

[2:24] Nermal likes Garfield.

[2:26] Garfield does not like Nermal.

[2:27] What about Arlene?

[2:28] Spiders don't like Garfield.

Elliott Kalan

[2:28] Does Arlene like Garfield?

Dan McCoy

[2:30] I think Arlene's position on Garfield is undetermined at this time.

Elliott Kalan

[2:34] I think Arlene just sees money signs when she looks at Garfield.

Dan McCoy

[2:38] But yeah, Garfield celebrates his birthday.

[2:43] Who knows?

[2:44] In the comics page every year, on my birthday, making Garfield the oldest cat.

[2:52] But anyway, Garfield, of course, currently setting the box office on fire in the week of this recording,

[3:00] still at number four on the fourth week of release.

[3:04] Of course, for the first three weeks, it had the advantage of being the only kids movie in theaters.

[3:08] So that probably juiced the stats a bit.

[3:11] But it's made about...

Elliott Kalan

[3:11] Yeah, Inside Out 2 probably bumped it down quite a bit.

[3:13] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[3:14] Yeah.

[3:14] It's made around $218 million on a $60 million budget as of this taping.

[3:21] Despite, I hear, eliminating most of Garfield's already meager personality from the film.

[3:28] But we aren't here to talk about Garfield.

[3:31] We're here to talk about birthdays and birthday twins.

[3:33] Then why were you talking about Garfield all that much?

Elliott Kalan

[3:36] Hold on.

Dan McCoy

[3:37] Garfield specifically.

[3:38] We're talking about birthday twins.

Elliott Kalan

[3:40] Oh, birthday twins.

[3:42] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[3:42] And the fact that Garfield has a successful movie in theaters was the hook to get us into this.

[3:49] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[3:50] I don't know that you...

[3:50] I don't know...

[3:51] We're snared.

[3:52] We're snared in the web of Dan's creation.

[3:54] People are loving this.

Elliott Kalan

[3:55] We took a longer detour down Garfield Avenue than was necessary.

Dan McCoy

[3:58] People are loving it.

[3:59] They love that plus-size cat and his love of lasagna, and they love this...

[4:04] But we're not talking about that cat now, Dan.

[4:06] No, not anymore.

[4:07] But that's what got him in the door.

[4:08] Garfield was a loss leader.

[4:10] Oh, I see.

Stuart Wellington

[4:10] Dan, I feel like you could pull off a Garfield costume for Halloween.

[4:18] Oh, for sure.

Elliott Kalan

[4:19] Yeah.

[4:19] I don't know if that's a compliment, but...

[4:21] It's a compliment.

[4:22] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[4:23] I don't know what you mean by pull off.

[4:24] It's a Halloween.

[4:25] You know, everyone's wearing a costume.

Stuart Wellington

[4:26] No, but I mean you could also...

[4:28] You could zhuzh it up and bring the personality to Garfield has, too.

Dan McCoy

[4:32] It's true.

[4:33] Chris Pratt.

Stuart Wellington

[4:34] There, I said it.

Dan McCoy

[4:35] Yeah, I'll say it, too.

[4:36] They should have cast Dan.

[4:37] I do not care for spiders, so at least I have that in common.

[4:40] But anyway...

Elliott Kalan

[4:41] What if for Halloween you had to dress as someone who shared your birthday?

Dan McCoy

[4:45] Well, we're going to find out if that works.

[4:46] We're going to find out in this Birthday Twins episode, if you let me get to it.

[4:49] Can't wait.

[4:50] So, I was prepping for this episode, right?

[4:52] I looked up famous...

[4:53] That's new?

[4:55] No, I...

Stuart Wellington

[4:55] Actually, it isn't.

[4:59] Whoa!

[4:59] Elliot just did a Bazooka Joe flip take on a friend.

Dan McCoy

[5:02] It is not new.

[5:03] These mini-episode prep sessions actually take far longer than one would expect.

[5:11] It took much of the day yesterday that was not spent cleaning the apartment for Meredith.

[5:18] Yeah, you can hear it all on tape, too.

[5:21] Anyway, when I was prepping for this episode...

[5:24] Mm-hmm.

[5:26] I...

[5:27] A thing that happens regularly, yeah.

[5:28] I checked to make sure I had you guys' birthdays down.

[5:31] I looked up famous people born on your birthdays.

Stuart Wellington

[5:35] Yeah, when Dan texted us to find out our birthday, I was like, is he trying to find out my fucking star chart?

[5:41] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[5:43] I know.

[5:43] I was trying to steal your identity.

Stuart Wellington

[5:44] Yeah, so I texted my mom.

[5:45] I'm like, what time was I born?

[5:47] And my mom's like, you're married.

[5:48] Don't listen to her.

[5:50] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[5:52] Less squirming in your chair.

[5:55] You're banging the camera.

[5:56] I know.

[5:56] I'm getting excited.

Stuart Wellington

[5:57] Okay.

[5:58] Dan's mini sounds like so much fun.

[6:00] I'm just getting worried about it.

[6:01] Yeah, we're talking about birthdays.

[6:02] Not Garfield, unfortunately, as I was led to believe it.

Dan McCoy

[6:05] Well, we might.

[6:06] We could be.

[6:07] We might circle back.

[6:08] We'll circle.

[6:08] Well, who knows?

[6:09] Anyway.

Elliott Kalan

[6:10] I feel like every audience member during Kangaroo Jack's first theatrical run

[6:14] who went in expecting a movie about a wisecracking rapping kangaroo and didn't get it.

Dan McCoy

[6:20] Yeah.

[6:21] So, I looked up famous people born on you guys' birthdays.

[6:26] Oh, okay.

[6:27] And to clarify, unlike with me and my birthday twin, Garfield,

[6:31] in most cases, the year will not be the same,

[6:33] but just the date.

[6:35] The month and the day.

Elliott Kalan

[6:37] Stan, do you have a framed copy of the first Garfield?

Dan McCoy

[6:41] I don't.

[6:42] That'd be a great birthday gift.

Elliott Kalan

[6:44] That'd be a great birthday gift.

Dan McCoy

[6:46] Yeah.

[6:46] Oh, probably pricey these days.

[6:49] But who knows?

Stuart Wellington

[6:50] Yeah.

[6:52] Yeah, yeah.

[6:53] What's the comic buyer's guide valuation on the first strip of Garfield?

[6:58] Near mint.

[6:59] It doesn't have to be mint.

[7:00] No, it doesn't have to be total mint.

Elliott Kalan

[7:01] I mean, a little bit of raggedness adds some character to it.

Dan McCoy

[7:03] Yeah.

[7:04] Let me check this edition of Wizard and see what they say.

Elliott Kalan

[7:07] Yeah, Wizard covers a lot of comic strip prices.

[7:10] Yeah.

[7:10] That's the gag.

[7:12] I know, I know.

Dan McCoy

[7:13] All right.

[7:13] Anyway.

[7:14] When I was...

[7:15] Okay, I said that part already.

[7:17] From that list of famous people, for each of you, I've assembled a special birthday-themed

[7:24] movie playlist.

[7:25] Okay.

[7:26] Now, it's going to be...

[7:29] You have six movie twins each.

[7:32] Each of these movies I'm going to talk about is related to someone born on your birthday.

[7:38] First, I'm going to see if, from what I say...

[7:41] Well, not really from what I say, but I'm going to see whether you can guess who your

[7:44] birthday twin is, who's associated with this movie, and then I'm going to ask you what

[7:49] characteristic you think you share with this person who shares your birthday.

Elliott Kalan

[7:53] Okay, interesting.

[7:54] Interesting.

Dan McCoy

[7:55] So, we started with me addressing my birthday.

[7:59] So, in descending age, we'll go to the second most decrepit Flophouse co-host, Stuart.

Elliott Kalan

[8:05] Yeah.

[8:06] I'm just falling apart over here, folks.

[8:08] Yeah.

[8:08] Despite being in the best shape of all of us, Stuart is actually 10 years older than me.

[8:14] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[8:16] So, Stu, you were born on February the 26th, and in your birth year on February the 26th,

[8:24] yeah, February 26th, Kramer vs. Kramer topped the box office.

[8:29] Ooh.

[8:29] And then also doing well in theaters, boxes, starring a young Jodie Foster.

[8:33] And then, after that, question mark, question mark, question mark, because records for that

[8:38] time are oddly spotty.

[8:40] I could not find further box office information.

[8:43] But that's just a little color.

[8:44] That's setting the movie stage.

[8:45] Yeah, yeah.

[8:45] You're just painting a picture.

[8:46] Yeah, no.

Elliott Kalan

[8:47] This is just the Garfield moment for this part.

[8:49] Yeah.

[8:50] Unnecessary information.

[8:51] Yeah.

[8:51] To confuse us.

Dan McCoy

[8:52] The pad out.

[8:53] It's the journey, homie.

Elliott Kalan

[8:54] It's not the destination.

[8:55] It is.

Dan McCoy

[8:56] On the flop house, it is 100% the journey, not the destination.

[9:00] The premise for this is thin.

[9:02] It's the curlicues along the way that make it interesting.

[9:06] Okay.

[9:06] The first movie, Walk the Line from 2005.

[9:09] A musical biopic, of course, about legendary country star Johnny Cash, directed by James Mangold

[9:15] and starring Joaquin Phoenix as Johnny Cash, Reese Witherspoon as June Carter, and Robert

[9:20] Patrick as Ray Cash, the non-comedy version of the wrong kid died character from Walk Hard.

[9:26] A little fact I found out about this movie.

[9:30] It had its origins in an episode of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, where Johnny Cash guest starred,

[9:37] became friends with Jane Seymour, and began talks with her ex-husband, James Keach, who

[9:44] was directing that episode about making a movie of his life, Johnny Cash.

[9:48] Of course, you know, it went through a lot of changes since then, but that's where it started.

[9:54] And so, who do you think, Stuart, maybe you know, maybe you know who was born on your birthday.

[10:00] Who do you think inspired the inclusion of Walk the Line on this birthday movie megamix?

Stuart Wellington

[10:08] I don't.

[10:09] I'm kind of struggling here.

[10:10] Is it?

[10:12] It's not Johnny Cash.

[10:14] It is.

[10:14] The man in black himself.

[10:15] Oh, wow.

Dan McCoy

[10:16] Johnny Cash was born on February 26, 1932.

[10:24] So.

[10:24] Let's see.

[10:25] What do I have in common with Johnny Cash?

Stuart Wellington

[10:26] What do you have in common, do you think, with Johnny Cash?

[10:28] Cruel as hell.

[10:29] That's one thing.

[10:31] Yeah.

[10:31] Super cool.

Elliott Kalan

[10:32] Somewhat self-destructive at times.

[10:34] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[10:34] That's 100% true.

[10:37] Let's see.

[10:38] Something about a ring of fire.

[10:41] That works.

[10:42] Yeah.

[10:43] I don't know.

[10:44] I think I feel like I could do a show.

[10:46] I could do a show at a prison, right?

Dan McCoy

[10:48] Yeah.

[10:49] Like, what kind of show would you do at a prison, do you think?

Stuart Wellington

[10:52] Well, what's your act?

[10:53] Yeah.

[10:53] Like, I'd like to teach them how to paint Warhammer guys.

[10:55] I think they'd give it.

Dan McCoy

[10:56] Okay.

[10:57] Yeah.

[10:57] I think they'd love that.

[10:58] Yeah.

[10:59] It's meditative.

[11:00] That would help, you know, with any sort of anger urges.

Elliott Kalan

[11:03] Pass the time, man.

[11:04] I mean, the warden may ask you to use a slightly less violent form of painting object, you know,

[11:09] but maybe they won't.

[11:10] Yeah.

[11:10] Love hammer.

Stuart Wellington

[11:11] But I'm using a, yeah, I'm using a gun, a paint gun, an airbrush.

Dan McCoy

[11:18] Okay.

[11:18] So that was, I started out on an easy one.

[11:21] Of course, Johnny Cash, the obvious guess from a movie about Johnny Cash.

[11:26] Jonathan Cash.

[11:26] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[11:27] No.

[11:28] So wait, it couldn't have been one of the actors in the movie?

[11:31] Could have been.

[11:31] Okay.

[11:32] Could have been, but wasn't.

Dan McCoy

[11:33] You'll see, as we go on, the associations may become more whimsical.

Stuart Wellington

[11:37] Also, like, yeah, like, Joaquin Phoenix doesn't have, like, Pisces vibes.

[11:43] Like, he doesn't have birthdays.

[11:45] He doesn't have birthdays.

Elliott Kalan

[11:48] He is and always has been and always will be, the Alpha and Omega.

[11:52] Yeah.

[11:52] Without beginning or end, Joaquin Phoenix.

Dan McCoy

[11:55] Now, the next film is also from 2005, and it is...

[12:00] Is this for me or for Stuart?

[12:01] This is for Stuart.

[12:02] They're all for Stuart, and then they go to you after the break.

[12:06] You got it.

[12:07] Dave Chappelle's Block Party.

[12:09] Now, while I'm not a fan of the man Dave Chappelle seems to have become, or perhaps always was,

[12:14] this is a great concert film.

[12:16] Fortunately, you can mostly ignore him and enjoy the amazing performances.

[12:22] directed by Michelle Gondry and featuring the Fugees, Dead Prez, Erika Badu, Common, The Roots, Black Star, and Jill Scott.

[12:31] Shot very close to one of my old apartments.

[12:35] A great Brooklyn concert film.

Elliott Kalan

[12:38] I remember you're in the movie, right?

[12:40] Leaning out your window and yelling at them to turn it down.

[12:42] Uh-huh.

Dan McCoy

[12:43] Hold it.

[12:43] Stop.

[12:44] To stop that noise.

[12:46] Who would you say?

[12:47] Who would you guess?

Stuart Wellington

[12:49] I think this is still a guess, but I think I'm right.

[12:53] Yeah.

[12:53] Is it most deaf?

Dan McCoy

[12:55] No, actually.

[12:56] Oh, wow.

[12:56] Your birthday twin is Erika Badu.

[12:59] Oh, that's cool.

[13:00] February 26, 1971.

[13:04] Saw her in concert at Celebrate Brooklyn.

[13:07] It was a very, very, very hot night.

[13:10] She apparently had plane troubles.

[13:12] Took the stage very late.

[13:14] In the meantime, I saw several people being taken out on stretchers because it was either so hot or maybe substances were involved.

[13:22] But the great compliment I can give to that concert is she was so good.

[13:27] By when it started, no one cared.

[13:29] No one cared how hot it had been.

[13:32] That's true.

[13:33] She is your birthday twin.

[13:35] What do you think you have in common?

Stuart Wellington

[13:37] I don't know enough about Erika Badu.

Dan McCoy

[13:39] Neo-soul artist Erika Badu.

Stuart Wellington

[13:42] I do know that if I show up late, people forget that they were mad at me that I was so late.

Dan McCoy

[13:48] Right, because you're so charming once you're there.

Stuart Wellington

[13:49] And I am late a lot.

[13:52] Let's see.

[13:53] I'll vouch for that.

Dan McCoy

[13:54] I think that that's a...

[13:55] That's pretty good.

[13:56] A pretty good connection.

[13:58] So, yeah.

[14:00] That's your place in the Flophouse.

[14:02] Okay.

[14:03] Late coming Charmer.

[14:06] Okay.

[14:06] So, moving a little bit back in time.

[14:10] 1997.

[14:11] The year is 1997.

[14:13] The film on your Megamix is Hercules.

[14:19] The animated Disney take on the legendary Greek hero whose adventures you can continue to enjoy in comics form due to a comic written by Chex Notes Elliot Kalin?

Elliott Kalan

[14:31] That's right.

[14:32] On comic store shelves now from Dynamite Entertainment.

[14:35] It's Hercules.

[14:36] Alex, edit out Elliot's plug because this is my section.

[14:41] Don't do it, Alex.

[14:42] Don't do it.

Stuart Wellington

[14:43] Make sure people know they can buy Hercules at Comicstores now written by me.

Elliott Kalan

[14:45] Don't do it.

Dan McCoy

[14:47] A little bit more about Hercules.

[14:49] Maybe there's something in here.

[14:51] Maybe there isn't.

[14:52] Directed by the legendary animation team of Clements and Musker starring the voices of Tate Donovan, James Woods, Danny DeVito, and Susan Egan as Meg, the sexiest Disney heroine not named Elastigirl.

[15:07] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[15:08] What?

[15:09] Esmeralda from Hunchback's pretty hot.

[15:11] Yeah.

[15:11] I mean, that's the whole plot of that movie.

Elliott Kalan

[15:13] The whole plot is that she's so hot that the bad guy is losing faith in God, right?

Stuart Wellington

[15:18] And he is like a legit banger of a song about it.

[15:21] Yes, he does.

[15:22] That's a great – Hellfire, that's a great song.

Elliott Kalan

[15:23] What about Maleficent, Dan?

[15:24] Is she not a protagonist?

[15:26] I'm talking about the animated one, not the live-action one.

[15:29] The animated one.

Dan McCoy

[15:31] The one who can turn into a dragon in bed.

[15:34] For me, yeah, that makes it a little too scary for me, for my own personal tastes.

[15:39] Okay, that's fair.

[15:40] Meg has a real sort of sadder but wiser sardonic attitude I respond to.

Elliott Kalan

[15:46] And you'll be seeing a lot of that attitude with Meg in the Hercules comic book.

[15:50] Meg's a big part of it.

[15:51] Okay, that's great.

[15:52] Not the movie The Meg.

Stuart Wellington

[15:56] What about The Meg 2?

[15:56] I was so disappointed when I went there.

Dan McCoy

[15:58] I was like, oh, finally, more adventures of my favorite Disney heroine.

[16:01] Where's Megara?

Stuart Wellington

[16:01] Oh, it's a giant shark.

[16:04] Let's see.

[16:06] And the movie's Heracles?

[16:09] Yep.

[16:10] Spelled with a K.

[16:13] Let's see.

[16:16] Why would it?

[16:17] Well, I have, in a way, my life has been 12 labors.

Dan McCoy

[16:22] Doesn't even have to be someone I mentioned.

Stuart Wellington

[16:25] And I was born to greatness, but I really had to learn about it and really push myself to really achieve greatness.

[16:34] Let's see.

[16:35] You didn't have it thrust upon you.

[16:37] You achieved it.

[16:37] There's that one time I wrestled a guy, but I could only beat him if I lifted him up off the ground.

[16:42] That was really cool.

[16:44] And I had to clean out that shitty stable that one time.

[16:47] Yeah, you moved a river.

[16:48] Yeah.

[16:48] That was horrible.

[16:49] But I did it.

[16:50] You know, that's the thing.

[16:51] Some would say that was kind of laborious.

Dan McCoy

[16:55] So you think that you share a birthday with half-god Hercules is what you're saying.

Stuart Wellington

[17:02] Yes.

[17:02] Yeah.

[17:03] I'm saying please don't be James Woods is my guess.

[17:06] You're in luck.

Dan McCoy

[17:07] Your birthday twin is Michael Bolton, who was born on February 26, 1953.

[17:15] He, of course, sang the soft pop end credits version of Go the Distance for the film Hercules.

[17:22] Now, what would you say you have in common with Michael Bolton?

Stuart Wellington

[17:26] Notable heads of hair.

[17:28] Yeah.

[17:29] That's the first thing I would thought, too.

[17:30] Strong jawline.

[17:31] Yeah.

[17:32] Yeah.

[17:33] And surprisingly funny when put in situations.

Dan McCoy

[17:38] It's true.

[17:39] When asked to do comedy, Bolton delivers.

[17:44] All right.

[17:44] This is a good Megamix so far, Dan.

[17:46] Yeah.

[17:47] Honestly, I have to say, your Megamix is movies that mostly, we got a questionable one coming up,

[17:58] but mostly I think would be a good.

[18:02] A good birthday mix for me.

[18:03] Yeah.

[18:04] Elliot gets into.

[18:06] Hmm.

[18:06] Ooh.

[18:07] Well.

[18:07] Okay.

[18:08] Well, we'll get there.

[18:09] We'll get there.

[18:09] Thanks for the tease.

[18:12] You know what?

[18:12] Elliot's is not bad except for maybe a few notable.

[18:16] Anyway.

[18:17] Mm-hmm.

[18:17] So, moving on.

[18:21] The next film is Les Miserables.

[18:24] The 2012 version.

[18:27] Based on the classic novel.

[18:28] It is the 48th adaptation of the book worldwide.

[18:33] And thus far, the last one.

[18:34] Although there is another one in development.

[18:37] Now, this 2012 version is based on the popular Broadway musical of the same name.

[18:44] And it stars Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, and Anne Hathaway, who won an Oscar for her performance

[18:51] as Fantine.

[18:53] And here's some trivia for Les Mis 2012.

[18:57] Russell Crowe thinks he can sing.

[19:00] So, that's a little.

Elliott Kalan

[19:02] He is a rock star, Dan.

[19:04] He does have a band.

Dan McCoy

[19:05] He does have a certain number of feet of grunt.

Elliott Kalan

[19:08] He does have 30-odd.

[19:09] About 30-odd feet of grunt, yeah.

[19:11] Okay.

[19:11] Yeah, around 30.

Dan McCoy

[19:14] Not an exact measurement of grunt.

Stuart Wellington

[19:16] Yeah, I don't know.

[19:17] I don't think it's Anne Hathaway.

[19:21] But I want it to be.

[19:24] Who is it, Dan?

[19:25] Who's my birthday twin?

Dan McCoy

[19:26] This one's a bit of a trick.

[19:27] Doesn't matter that it's the 2012 version because your birthday twin is Victor Hugo.

[19:32] More like Victor Stugo!

Stuart Wellington

[19:35] February 26, 1802.

[19:39] Okay.

[19:39] Almost actual birthday twins.

[19:41] Yeah.

[19:43] Yes, exactly.

Dan McCoy

[19:45] Almost the same year.

[19:47] What would you say you have in common with Mr. Victor Hugo, one of the most famous French novelists?

Stuart Wellington

[19:55] Well, I would say both.

[19:59] I would say probably my second favorite Street Fighter character is Hugo, and I bet that's the same thing for Victor Hugo.

[20:06] Yeah, probably.

Dan McCoy

[20:08] So, yeah, if Victor Hugo was a selectable character in Street Fighter, you would enjoy it.

Stuart Wellington

[20:13] The thing is that if Victor Hugo and I were sat down in my apartment to play some fucking Street Fighter, we'd be fighting over who gets to play Hugo.

[20:22] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[20:23] I must play him.

[20:24] He has my name.

[20:26] Uh-huh.

[20:26] Hugo.

Stuart Wellington

[20:27] Uh-huh.

[20:28] And I'm like, well, okay, then I'll just play my normal number one favorite, Zongief.

[20:33] Yeah.

[20:34] Or Zongief, as he sometimes.

Dan McCoy

[20:36] You show him a DVD copy of Hugo, you're like, well, why don't you watch this instead, Victor?

[20:41] Uh-huh.

Dan McCoy

[20:41] Distract him.

Stuart Wellington

[20:41] That's a powerful finishing move.

[20:43] It's distracting with a DVD of Hugo.

[20:46] He's never seen a movie before.

[20:48] He's like, what is this?

[20:49] Enjoy the magic of the movies, idiot.

Dan McCoy

[20:53] He's trying to chew on the DVD.

[20:55] He doesn't know what to do with it.

Stuart Wellington

[20:56] Uh-huh.

[20:56] That's not a baguette, buddy.

[20:58] It's a tribute to the early days of silent film, asshole.

Dan McCoy

[21:04] The next movie in this premise.

Stuart Wellington

[21:10] I've never actually seen that Les Mis movie.

[21:13] Is it good?

[21:14] Bad?

Dan McCoy

[21:16] It's not great.

[21:18] I respect the choice that was made to have them record the sound live for the singing rather than juice it up in the studio and make it sound like-

Stuart Wellington

[21:31] Like auto-tune the shit on Russell Crowe.

Dan McCoy

[21:33] Yeah.

[21:33] But it's shot in a lot of extreme close-ups, which are kind of weird.

[21:38] And as previously said, like Russell Crowe, he does fine for a man who's not a Broadway singer, but he's not a Broadway singer.

[21:45] Anne Hathaway is very good in it, though.

[21:48] Anyway, the next movie.

[21:51] Buffalo Bill and the Indians or Sitting Bull's History Lesson, 1976.

[21:57] This film is directed by Robert Altman, one of my personal faves, so it is odd that I have not seen this movie.

Elliott Kalan

[22:03] This is one I've been actively putting off seeing for many years.

[22:07] Really?

[22:07] Yeah, just because I'm worried it's not going to be very good.

Dan McCoy

[22:10] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[22:10] Sometimes you get a great movie from Altman.

[22:13] Sometimes you get a quintet where you're like, I should have not watched this.

Dan McCoy

[22:18] Well, you know what?

[22:20] I'll skip to some trivia for this.

[22:22] Maybe that'll make it more interesting to you.

[22:25] Apparently, Paul Newman cites this as one of his favorites of his own work.

[22:30] So it edges out movies like The Verdict, Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid, salad dressing commercials.

[22:37] So he likes this one.

[22:40] But IMDb describes the plot thusly.

[22:44] A cynical Buffalo Bill hires Sitting Bull to exploit him and to add his credibility to the distorted view of history presented in his Wild West show.

[22:56] Starring Paul Newman, Joel Gray, Kevin McCarthy, and Harvey Keitel.

[23:02] What do you think?

Stuart Wellington

[23:03] I'm going to shoot the moon and hope that it's Paul Newman.

[23:08] Close.

Dan McCoy

[23:09] Your birthday twin is Buffalo Bill.

[23:11] Oh.

[23:12] Birth name, William Frederick Cody.

[23:15] February 26, 1846.

[23:18] And presuming that you know as little about Buffalo Bill as I do, I will present what I gleaned very quickly about him.

[23:27] A Union soldier in the Civil War.

[23:30] He got the nickname Buffalo Bill as the result of a contract to supply workers for the Kansas Pacific Railroad with buffalo meat.

[23:38] He killed many buffaloes.

[23:40] Two buffaloes.

[23:41] A writer named Ned Buntline wrote highly fictionalized stories.

[23:46] Buntline.

[23:47] Ned Buntline.

Elliott Kalan

[23:48] Sounded like you said buttline.

[23:49] That's what I said.

[23:50] Okay.

[23:51] Anyway, wrote highly fictionalized.

[23:52] No.

[23:53] Because there is such a thing as a buttline.

[23:55] It's just the line in the middle of a butt.

Dan McCoy

[23:57] Pretty sure I did say buntline.

[23:59] But let's, I mean, I enjoyed the butt talk.

[24:03] He wrote highly fictionalized stories and a novel based on Buffalo Bill's tales of his life, which became a hit play and led to Bill having his touring Wild West show, which had various incarnations, but combined theater with horse tricks, with shooting, with lies about Native Americans.

[24:19] So that is Buffalo Bill.

[24:22] What do you think you have in common with historical figure?

Stuart Wellington

[24:26] That's, you know, the, I would say the fictionalized story of Stuart Wellington is a little bit larger than the man himself.

[24:37] Mm-hmm.

[24:38] And also, I could use a cool little animal nickname in front of stew, like Buffalo stew.

Dan McCoy

[24:47] Buffalo stew.

[24:48] That's pretty good.

[24:49] I mean, but that sounds like a dish, like Buffalo stew.

[24:52] It does sound like something you would eat, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[24:54] Instead of Buffalo Bill, which sounds like a, like a.

[24:58] The bill you get for eating Buffalo stew.

Elliott Kalan

[25:01] All that buffalo.

[25:03] Can you bring me the Buffalo Bill, please?

[25:07] And.

[25:08] Waiter.

[25:09] Buffalo Bill, please.

[25:10] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[25:11] So this next and last for you, Stuart, film is.

[25:17] What a mix so far.

[25:19] Pretty good.

[25:19] Yeah.

[25:20] Very unexpected.

[25:21] This one is just short.

[25:25] It comes at the end.

[25:27] Odd to put the short at the end, but that's the way I did it.

[25:29] It's Red Hot Riding Hood from 1943.

[25:33] Classic.

[25:34] Seven-minute animated short in which a wolf is horny for a human.

[25:38] Female nightclub singer.

[25:40] Makes sense.

[25:40] Directed by Tex Avery.

[25:43] Sarah Burner provided Red's speaking voice.

[25:45] Connie Russell was her singing voice.

[25:47] And Dawes Butler, whom you may know as Yogi Bear, Snagglepuss, Huckleberry Hound, is one of two listed voice actors on IMDb who did Wolf Howls for that short, while two other voice actors did Wolf Dialogue.

[26:02] So it took four actors to bring the Wolf to life in Red Hot Riding Hood.

[26:08] And here is some trivia I got from the wiki.

[26:12] Apparently, the short originally ended with a shotgun wedding between Red and the wolf.

[26:17] But censors nixed that because they thought it implied bestiality.

[26:21] So it was replaced with the family-friendly existing ending where the wolf merely commits suicide by shooting himself in the head with two pistols.

Elliott Kalan

[26:31] I love also the whole cartoon is about how much this wolf wants to fuck this woman.

[26:36] And they're like, we can't show them get married.

[26:38] That implies that there's a sex thing involved.

[26:40] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[26:41] Well, that sounds like me.

[26:43] The wolf can lust for the woman.

Elliott Kalan

[26:45] Yeah, I see.

[26:46] But she can't give in to it.

[26:47] Yeah.

[26:48] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[26:49] So what do you think?

[26:50] What do you think in this situation?

[26:52] Well, uh...

[26:54] Do you think it's Red Hot Riding Hood?

Stuart Wellington

[26:55] Do you think that's your birthday?

[26:56] I think the character is probably not me.

[26:59] Yeah.

[26:59] That's probably not the wolf character.

Dan McCoy

[27:02] Mm-hmm.

[27:03] We do have something in common.

Stuart Wellington

[27:06] Wait, who's the animator?

Dan McCoy

[27:08] Tex Avery.

[27:09] I'm going to guess Tex Avery.

[27:11] You are correct.

[27:11] Yeah!

[27:12] Born Frederick Bean Avery on February 26, 1908.

[27:18] So what do you think you have in common with famous animator...

[27:23] Animator...

[27:24] Why did I...

[27:24] I can't talk today, guys.

[27:26] Animator...

[27:27] It's okay.

[27:27] You're just a podcaster.

Stuart Wellington

[27:29] The...

[27:29] I would say...

[27:32] Like...

[27:33] We're both horny weirdos who like comics and stuff.

[27:38] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[27:41] That's pretty straightforward.

[27:42] I feel like that's...

[27:42] We are a horny weirdo who likes comics.

[27:43] Yeah.

[27:44] And stuff.

[27:45] And stuff.

[27:46] You like stuff as well.

[27:47] You don't...

[27:47] Don't pin them down.

[27:48] Don't pigeonhole me.

[27:49] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[27:49] It could be lots of...

[27:50] You were also instrumental in the development of Bugs Bunny, right?

[27:53] Just like Tex Avery was?

[27:54] That's the other thing.

[27:55] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[27:57] Hey, we've reached the midpoint of this mini.

[27:59] So, Elliot, why don't you plug our Boston show and also maybe if you have any personal projects you want to talk about.

Elliott Kalan

[28:07] I'd love to.

[28:08] Well, I'm always working on myself, on my own emotions, on how I'm either resilient or resistant or active in this world.

[28:15] So that's the biggest project right now.

[28:16] It's called Me.

[28:17] But before we get to that, let's talk about how the Flophouse is going to be in Boston, Massachusetts.

[28:22] We're going to Boston.

[28:24] That's a Boston accent, right?

[28:26] Now is the part of the episode where I, Elliot Kalin, tell you about our upcoming live shows.

[28:30] And I do it at the same time we record the rest of the episode.

[28:33] It's certainly not a message that was recorded later using information we didn't have at the time we were recording the episode.

[28:41] We're all right here in the room together just like normal recording the whole episode.

[28:44] Right, Dan?

[28:45] Yeah.

[28:45] Right, Stu?

[28:46] Yeah, dude.

[28:47] So let me tell you about it in this perfectly real-time explanation.

[28:51] On July 26th, we will be in Boston, Massachusetts doing a live show courtesy of WBUR at WBUR City Space.

[28:59] Now, as we know and certainly didn't learn after recording the rest of the episode, that show is sold out right now.

[29:06] You can no longer buy tickets to see it in person, but WBUR has opened up the ability for you to live stream it.

[29:13] So go to flophousepodcast.com slash events and click on the info and ticks button for that show.

[29:19] It'll take you to the page where you can buy a live streaming ticket.

[29:21] Now, I should warn you, this is just going to be a pretty basic, straightforward, in-the-moment live stream.

[29:27] It's not going to be the kind of beautifully polished, beautifully edited, immaculately shot show that we've been doing with StagePilot lately.

[29:34] If you saw our Speed 2 show, you saw how gorgeous that looked, how well put together it was.

[29:38] That's thanks to the fine people at StagePilot.

[29:40] This is not going to be as polished as that.

[29:42] This is going to be a little more ragtag.

[29:44] So don't expect the level of production that you've come to expect from the Flophouse StagePilot collaboration.

[29:50] This is just us and WBUR live streaming a show that otherwise you wouldn't be able to see because it's sold out.

[29:55] So please go to flophousepodcast.com slash events.

[29:59] Click on the info and ticks button for Boston, and it'll take you to that page if you would like to live stream the episode because you can't make it there in person.

[30:07] You couldn't get a ticket, or you just decided maybe you want to watch it both ways, and you'll be sitting in the audience with a computer in your lap live streaming the show as it happens in order to do a lag test, I guess, maybe.

[30:22] Anyway, that's what you can do.

[30:23] So we'll be in Boston July 26.

[30:25] That show is sold out, but you can live stream it.

[30:28] Just go to flophousepodcast.com slash events for more information.

[30:32] I also wanted to mention two personal projects of my own.

[30:35] One of them was mentioned earlier in this episode.

[30:38] The comic book Hercules, or Disney Hercules, is out in comic book stores now.

[30:42] It's on shelves, written by me from Dynamite Comics, and it continues the adventures of Hercules, the world's mightiest mortal hero of Olympus and champion of ancient Greece.

[30:54] And it is a series that starts out with kind of individual issues, and they build to a larger story.

[31:00] And I'm now currently writing the second-to-last issue of the series.

[31:05] It's projected to be a 12-issue series.

[31:07] And things have gotten big in scope, epic in scope, and very exciting.

[31:11] And I'm really loving writing it.

[31:12] Be ready to see all the favorite characters you love from Hercules, and also a bunch of new characters from Greek mythology.

[31:19] Does Polyphemus show up?

[31:22] Polyphemus does not currently show up, but you know what?

[31:24] I wish I had thought to have him in.

Stuart Wellington

[31:25] Yeah.

[31:26] He's pretty cool.

[31:26] You can make a joke, because he only has one eye, Dan.

Dan McCoy

[31:29] I mean, he did.

[31:30] I mean, I don't know what his deal is.

[31:32] I'm not a Greek mythology person.

[31:34] Go on, Dan.

Elliott Kalan

[31:35] Well, then we won't make Dan feel dumb by talking about Greek mythology too much.

[31:38] No, I'm curious about this guy.

[31:40] He seems to be a Polyphemus.

[31:40] You'll never know.

[31:41] You'll never know, Dan.

[31:42] Something you have to find out for yourself, or else it won't mean anything if I just tell you.

[31:45] So the other thing I want to mention is, if you want to hear more of me podcasting, why not head over to the 99% Invisible feed and listen to the 99% Invisible Breakdown, The Power Broker, where every month, Roman Mars and I are breaking down 100 pages of The Power Broker by Robert Caro.

[32:01] Not the same 100 pages every month.

[32:03] No, no, no.

[32:04] Each month, we will talk about—

[32:05] That would be the worst idea of all time.

[32:07] It would be the worst—second worst idea of all time, maybe.

[32:10] The original worst idea of all time, I still think would be the worst idea of all time.

[32:14] We're covering the entire length of the book over the course of the year.

[32:17] Please join us, won't you?

[32:18] We've had a lot of great interview guests.

[32:20] We talked to AOC.

[32:22] We've got one coming up this month with Mike Schur, creator of The Good Place among many television shows.

Dan McCoy

[32:29] I'm re-watching right now.

Elliott Kalan

[32:31] That's exciting.

[32:31] That's a good tie-in, Dan.

[32:32] I'm glad you mentioned that.

[32:34] Yeah, now's the time to listen to it now that Dan is re-watching The Good Place.

[32:39] It's very seasonal and topical.

[32:40] So go on over to the 99% Invisible feed, and then come on back and listen to some more MaxFun podcasts.

[32:45] But enjoy it.

[32:47] It's fun.

[32:47] Come on.

[32:48] It's The Power Broker.

[32:49] It's great.

[32:49] It's municipal history.

[32:50] Yeah, it's super fun, yeah.

[32:51] Psst.

Stuart Wellington

[32:52] Hey, you.

[32:53] This is Stuart from The Flophouse, inviting you to a secret little event.

[32:56] On Friday, July 5th, 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, Dan and I are going to be hosting another episode of The Slophouse.

[33:03] That is a live show from Dan's Kitchen where he makes me a meal, I make some cocktails, and we hang out and chat for a while.

[33:12] All you have to do is head over to my Twitch channel, Stuart Wellington, to catch the whole show.

[33:17] That's Friday, July 5th, 8 p.m.

[33:20] See you there.

Dan McCoy

[33:50] We'll be right back.

S4

[33:51] And every week, we recap the episode and assign points based on how our chefs did.

Dan McCoy

[33:55] And at the end of the season, we crown a winner.

S4

[33:57] You can even play along at home if you want.

Dan McCoy

[33:58] Or you can just listen to us like a regular podcast about cooking shows.

[34:02] That's cool, too.

[34:03] Subscribe to TV Chef Fantasy League on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get your podcasts.

S4

[34:10] Hallelujah!

[34:11] Hello!

[34:11] Welcome, everyone!

Dan McCoy

[34:12] Step right up.

[34:13] We're going to heal you.

[34:14] We are the healers, Ross and Carrie.

S4

[34:16] Yes, yes.

[34:17] You there!

[34:18] You look like you're upset.

[34:20] Come up here!

Dan McCoy

[34:21] Yes, you are healed because you've listened to our podcast.

[34:24] Yes!

[34:24] Have you been having trouble with demons?

S4

[34:26] Are you sleeping too much?

[34:28] Too little?

[34:28] Just right?

Dan McCoy

[34:29] We have the solution.

[34:30] It is to listen to Oh No, Ross and Carrie.

S4

[34:34] A show where we examine unusual claims.

Dan McCoy

[34:37] We show up so you don't have to.

[34:39] Find us on MaximumFun.org.

S4

[34:41] We won't actually heal you.

Dan McCoy

[34:50] Let us get back to the mini, turning to Elliot.

[34:55] Elliot Kalen, that is.

Elliott Kalan

[34:57] Now it's time for me to get the treatment.

[34:58] Oh, boy.

[34:59] Elliot, of course, born on December 3rd.

Dan McCoy

[35:03] I know it.

[35:04] In Elliot's birth year, Raiders of the Lost Ark was tops of the box office.

[35:08] Well, not his birth year.

[35:10] In his birth week.

[35:10] Like the weekend after your birth.

[35:12] Yep.

[35:12] Okay.

[35:12] Raiders of the Lost Ark was tops.

[35:15] Also doing well in theaters.

[35:16] Reds.

[35:17] Up next, Time Bandits, Arthur, and the French Lieutenant's Woman.

[35:22] Wow.

[35:23] A little snapshot of your birthday bio.

Elliott Kalan

[35:28] It's amazing how, it's sad to me how few of those movies would be tops at the box office now.

[35:34] Basically, maybe Raiders and the rest, they just don't make them like that anymore.

Stuart Wellington

[35:38] You don't think Arthur would be huge at the box office?

Elliott Kalan

[35:42] I could see Arthur possibly.

[35:43] I mean, if they would make a feature-length comedy, then yeah, it could be.

Dan McCoy

[35:46] Yeah.

[35:47] I mean, in the world that we live in.

[35:49] Wait, Arthur's a comedy?

Stuart Wellington

[35:50] I know.

[35:51] What are the jokes?

Dan McCoy

[35:52] I know.

[35:52] We're still feeling the reverberating effects of the strike that we took part in.

[35:58] But, you know, these days, it's like one movie opens a week, it seems like, and that's it.

Elliott Kalan

[36:05] Don't blame the strike for that, Dan.

[36:07] This is the culmination of a lot of bad decisions by a lot of top executives.

Dan McCoy

[36:11] No, I agree.

[36:12] I agree.

[36:12] It's one factor of many.

Elliott Kalan

[36:15] Are we talking about my birthday here?

[36:17] Come on.

Dan McCoy

[36:18] Okay.

[36:18] Well, let's get back to it, shall we?

[36:21] In the first slot.

Elliott Kalan

[36:22] Are we still talking about Garfield for some reason?

[36:24] Let's get to my birthday finally.

Dan McCoy

[36:26] Well, let's stop talking about cartoon cats and start talking about a cartoon monkey?

[36:31] What?

[36:31] Is there such a thing?

[36:33] Monkey Bone, 2001.

[36:35] A mere two years after one of his biggest hits, 1999's The Mummy,

[36:39] Brendan Fraser stars in one of his most notorious flops, Monkey Bone.

[36:44] The live-action animation hybrid that put its director, stop-motion legend Henry Selick

[36:49] in director jail for eight years until Coraline in 2009.

[36:54] It's sort of like a less horny cool world.

[36:58] A cartoonist falls into a coma and is trapped in a limbo that looks like his own underground comic

[37:02] while his creation, the mischievous Monkey Bone.

Elliott Kalan

[37:07] Dan, the name's in the title.

[37:09] You know it's not Monkey Bone.

Dan McCoy

[37:12] You know, I've been to a neurologist.

[37:15] I just have a...

Elliott Kalan

[37:17] Well, now I feel sad about it.

Dan McCoy

[37:19] I just have a clumsy tongue.

[37:21] Anyway...

Elliott Kalan

[37:21] It's like if you were talking about Kramer versus Kramer like you did for Stuart and you're like,

[37:25] it's telling the story of Kramer in his court fight against Kamelu.

[37:29] It's like, well, come on.

[37:30] Wait a minute.

Dan McCoy

[37:31] So Monkey Bone.

[37:32] Anyway, the mischievous Monkey Bone voiced by John Turturro inhabits his body in the real world.

[37:40] It's a movie that definitely has flaws, but I maintain is underrated.

[37:44] It has a long sequence where Chris Kattan plays a corpse.

[37:47] That's the most I've ever laughed at Chris Kattan.

[37:50] Also, according to IMDb Trivia, Cartoon Network went on to make their hit late night block Adult Swim

[37:57] after receiving criticism from parents for supporting this movie during their regular programming.

[38:02] So apparently Adult Swim exists in part to have the freedom to support things like Monkey Bone.

[38:08] Wow.

[38:09] I still have never seen Monkey Bone.

[38:11] I've heard people told me to see it.

[38:13] It has its charms.

[38:15] It's a mess, but it looks interesting thanks to Henry Sully.

[38:20] It has some funny bits.

[38:22] Monkey Bone.

[38:22] Who do you think out of the rich tapestry that is Monkey Bone is your birthday twin?

Elliott Kalan

[38:27] Whoopi Goldberg.

[38:27] Now, it could be Chris Kattan because Kattan and Kalen kind of sound a little similar,

[38:32] but I'm going to say...

[38:33] Isn't Whoopi Goldberg in it?

Stuart Wellington

[38:34] You guys bring the same energy to the party.

[38:37] Yeah, yeah.

[38:37] I'm going to say Whoopi Goldberg.

Dan McCoy

[38:38] She's in it, right?

[38:39] Whoopi Goldberg is in Monkey Bone, but your birthday twin is Brendan Fraser.

[38:44] Whoa.

[38:45] I started y'all on an obvious one.

[38:47] I had no idea.

[38:48] He was born on December 3rd, 1968.

[38:51] What would you say you have in common with internet favorite Brendan Fraser?

Elliott Kalan

[38:58] Hmm.

[38:59] What do I have in common with internet favorite Brendan Fraser?

Stuart Wellington

[39:04] I mean, I actually...

[39:05] Did you receive like a...

[39:06] You received a super long-standing ovation at Cannes, right?

Elliott Kalan

[39:10] Yes, I did.

[39:11] And I did win Best Actor for The Whale.

[39:14] Yeah, I think...

[39:15] I once...

[39:16] I remember there was a...

[39:16] He did a promo for Comedy Central once where he was correcting his name as Fraser and not

[39:21] Fraser or something like that, or maybe it was the other way around.

[39:23] And I'm also very sensitive to my last name being mispronounced when people say Kalen or

[39:28] Kalan instead of Kalen.

[39:29] So I think that's what we have in common is we're both prickly about making sure our last

[39:32] names are pronounced correctly.

Dan McCoy

[39:34] I probably pronounced it incorrectly despite having it right in front of me.

[39:37] It is F-R-A-S-E-R.

[39:40] So there's...

[39:40] I think it's Brendan Fraser.

[39:41] Yeah.

[39:42] Yeah.

[39:42] It's not like the radio psychologist we all know.

Elliott Kalan

[39:47] Brendan Fraser knows what to do with scrambled eggs and toss them.

[39:50] Yeah.

[39:51] Even though sometimes baby the blues are calling.

[39:54] Yeah, of course.

[39:55] He's very open, I think, about how the blues have been calling him at times.

[39:58] Oh, that's the other thing.

[39:59] I think an open struggle with depression, I think would be the other thing I've become

[40:04] with Brendan Fraser.

[40:04] Elliot says while laughing.

[40:07] Hey, you gotta laugh, Stu.

Stuart Wellington

[40:08] Come on.

[40:09] That's what you do.

[40:09] You gotta laugh.

[40:11] A sad clown.

[40:13] It makes sense.

Dan McCoy

[40:14] Your next movie is from 2009, and it is titled Chloe, an Erotic Thriller, where Julianne

[40:23] Moore hires Amanda Seyfried to test her husband Liam Neeson's faithfulness, but instead, Moore

[40:29] and Seyfried end up fucking each other in a film I can only assume was made as the answer

[40:33] to some horny prayer I made while asleep.

[40:35] Directed by Canadian art house fave, Adam Agoyan.

Elliott Kalan

[40:39] Oh.

[40:41] Chloe.

[40:42] Who do you think?

[40:43] Chloe.

[40:44] I'm gonna say Adam Agoyan.

Dan McCoy

[40:47] I'm afraid you're incorrect.

[40:48] And this one is a trick.

[40:51] Both Amanda Seyfried and Julianne Moore were born on December 3rd.

Elliott Kalan

[40:56] Oh, I did not.

[40:57] So you think they celebrated a double birthday during the making of the movie?

Dan McCoy

[41:00] Yeah.

[41:00] Seyfried in 85, Moore in 60.

[41:04] So they are birthday buds together in Chloe.

Elliott Kalan

[41:10] What do you think you have?

[41:11] If you ever want to see a movie where two people with the same birthday have sex, Chloe is it.

Dan McCoy

[41:16] If that's your specific kink.

[41:18] Yep.

[41:19] Check out Chloe in your local library.

Stuart Wellington

[41:21] They both get to use the, but it's my birthday argument.

[41:26] Right, Dan?

[41:26] You know what I'm talking about.

[41:27] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[41:31] I guess so.

[41:34] What do you think you have in common with these two fine actresses?

Elliott Kalan

[41:38] It's hard for me to think.

[41:39] I mean, we all breathe oxygen in and let carbon dioxide out.

[41:43] You know, we all have to bring in food and excrete waste.

[41:46] That's all I can think of.

[41:47] Oh, man.

Stuart Wellington

[41:48] He's going to use this answer for everyone.

[41:50] I'm open to suggestions.

Dan McCoy

[41:53] But, well, let's see.

[41:55] Let's see.

[41:56] I think Amanda Seyfried had showed some real comic talent in Mean Girls.

Elliott Kalan

[42:03] Yeah, she's kind of nerdy in Jennifer's body, right?

[42:06] She wears glasses in that, right?

[42:08] Yep.

[42:09] So there's that.

Dan McCoy

[42:10] Yeah.

[42:11] And I assume that, like in Shortcuts, you argue with your spouse with no pants or underwear on a lot.

Elliott Kalan

[42:21] I don't know about a lot, but it's happened.

[42:24] Sure, yeah.

[42:24] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[42:25] Sure.

[42:25] So that's what you have in common with Julianne Moore.

[42:27] Yeah.

[42:28] Or at least her Shortcuts character.

Elliott Kalan

[42:30] We also are known for performing with strong Boston accents like she did in 30 Rock and I did in that promo.

[42:37] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[42:38] Oh, wow.

[42:39] Yeah.

[42:39] Perfect.

[42:39] See?

[42:40] You just go digging and you find all these connections.

[42:42] Yeah, you find gold.

[42:43] Yeah.

[42:43] The next film from 2001, Moulin Rouge.

[42:50] Baz Luhrmann's anachronistic musical extravaganza about love and pop music in the famously sexy Parisian nightclub starring Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor, Jim Broadbent, and John Leguizamo not playing a cartoon monkey, but instead famous artist Toulouse-Lautrec with cartoon energy.

[43:12] We re-watched, Audrey and I re-watched 80% of this recently because we saw the Broadway show, which we, it was fine.

[43:20] We didn't care for it that much.

[43:21] It mostly made us appreciate the movie, which held up well.

[43:25] So what do you think?

[43:27] What do you think your birthday twin is?

[43:29] Could be, perhaps is, someone completely unmentioned thus far.

[43:36] Okay.

[43:39] Don't look at this so much as a game as…

[43:41] I would say…

[43:42] Content for our podcast.

[43:43] I'm throwing in a guess.

Stuart Wellington

[43:44] I'm throwing in a guess here.

[43:45] Yeah.

[43:45] I'm jumping in here.

[43:47] Based just on Elliot's general vibe and attitude, I would say Little Kim from the Lady Marmalade song.

[43:54] Hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[43:55] It's a solid guess.

[43:56] Are you going to know that?

[43:57] I think I'm going to have to…

[43:57] I know it's not…

[43:58] So there's no…

[43:59] Hmm.

[43:59] Let's see.

[44:02] What about Madonna?

[44:03] There's a Madonna song in there, right?

Dan McCoy

[44:05] There is.

[44:06] They use Material Girl as part of the Diamonds medley that introduces Nicole Kidman.

[44:15] But your birthday twin, my friend, is Ozzy Osbourne, who is one of the voices of the Green Fairy.

[44:21] Kylie Minogue is the on-screen Green Fairy and does some of the singing and noises.

[44:27] But when the fairy does a rock and roll scream, that's Ozzy.

Elliott Kalan

[44:31] I knew Ozzy Osbourne was a birthday twin of mine.

[44:32] I didn't know he was in Moulin Rouge.

[44:34] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[44:35] December 3rd, 1948.

[44:36] What do you think you have in common with Ozzy Osbourne?

[44:39] We both love metal.

Elliott Kalan

[44:41] Bats.

[44:42] We both…

[44:43] Bats and chickens.

Dan McCoy

[44:45] Love eating bats.

[44:46] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[44:46] We love eating bats.

[44:48] Yeah, we love both.

[44:48] We're both carnivores.

[44:50] We both have trouble hearing sometimes.

[44:52] As I'm getting older, my hearing is getting worse.

[44:54] I have to assume his is non-existent at this point.

Stuart Wellington

[44:58] Do you wander around your house like Yoda, complaining to your family?

Dan McCoy

[45:03] I mean, yeah.

[45:04] Pretty.

[45:04] Yeah, I think so.

Stuart Wellington

[45:05] That sounds right, yeah.

[45:05] I feel like that sounds like Ellie to me.

[45:09] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[45:10] Well, we found out a lot in here.

Elliott Kalan

[45:11] This is going really well.

[45:13] One Osbourne, Osbourne.

[45:14] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[45:15] The next movie is Girls Trip 2017.

[45:21] The raunchy, woman-led, we're all going on a sexy trip to New Orleans comedy hit starring

[45:27] Regina Hall, Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith, and Tiffany Haddish, directed by Malcolm D. Lee,

[45:34] who did Undercover Brother, but also, unfortunately, Space Jam, A New Legacy.

[45:38] So, a checkered history.

[45:40] I saw Girls Trip on a plane, as I do many movies.

[45:44] I was loving it, but we landed 20 minutes before the end, so I went home and rented it to see

[45:49] the ending.

[45:50] They got you.

[45:51] Only to discover that the comedy parts had ended, and we just had these soggy, sentimental

[45:56] making-up parts at the end that I probably could have gone without, but still very funny.

Stuart Wellington

[46:01] You got closure.

[46:01] It makes sense to me.

[46:02] I got closure.

[46:02] Yeah.

[46:03] Not disclosure.

[46:04] No.

[46:04] Very different.

[46:05] We got that last week.

[46:07] Dan, I don't like that.

Dan McCoy

[46:09] Don't pretend like you didn't like that one.

[46:11] Come on.

[46:12] Who do you think your birthday twin is, Elliot?

[46:14] Who do you think you share a birthday?

[46:18] That's four stars in that movie.

[46:20] Who are the stars in it again?

[46:22] You got Regina Hall.

[46:24] You got Queen Latifah.

[46:26] Yeah.

[46:26] You got Jada Pinkett Smith, and you got Tiffany Haddish.

[46:29] Show me Queen Latifah.

[46:31] No, your birthday twin is Tiffany Haddish.

[46:34] Oh.

[46:35] This one year off, I believe.

[46:37] No, two years off.

[46:38] December 3rd, 1979.

[46:40] Oh.

[46:40] One year off of me.

[46:42] But that's not your birthday.

[46:44] Yeah.

[46:44] No.

[46:45] That was your birthday.

Stuart Wellington

[46:47] Almost his year twin.

Dan McCoy

[46:48] Yeah, my year twin.

[46:52] Otherwise known as someone who's the same age.

[46:54] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[46:56] You only have millions of those.

[46:58] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[46:59] So, Tiffany Haddish.

[47:00] Of course, I think the parallels are clear.

[47:03] Yeah.

[47:04] I think Elliot, I think Tiffany Haddish.

Elliott Kalan

[47:05] When I look in a mirror, that's what I see.

[47:07] Tiffany Haddish, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[47:08] Big comedic force.

[47:10] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[47:13] Fearless.

[47:14] Not afraid to go there.

[47:15] Mm-hmm.

[47:17] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[47:18] She played a detective on the after party.

[47:20] You've got kind of a boy detective vibe.

Elliott Kalan

[47:23] Sure, I guess.

[47:24] Yeah.

[47:24] That's possible.

[47:26] Mm-hmm.

[47:27] Mm-hmm.

[47:28] I think we did it.

Dan McCoy

[47:30] Yeah.

[47:30] There's one more.

[47:32] Okay.

[47:32] One more.

[47:34] In the interest of keeping things tight.

[47:38] Yeah, yeah.

[47:38] That double one touted for two.

[47:40] So, that was my scheme.

[47:42] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[47:42] That seems like not really fair.

[47:44] Like, I didn't get as much as Stuart, but that's okay.

Dan McCoy

[47:48] It's one of Dan's dastardly schemes.

[47:50] I mean, what are you going to do?

[47:51] What you get is you get out of this mini in time for your heart out that you mentioned earlier.

Elliott Kalan

[47:55] I do have a meeting to go to that I have to drive to across town.

[47:58] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[47:58] Yeah.

[47:58] So, the final film is from 1993.

[48:02] We all remember it.

[48:04] Reckless Kelly.

[48:06] The second film on this list I have not seen.

[48:09] So, again, I turn to the IMDb synopsis.

Stuart Wellington

[48:11] I've definitely seen this movie.

[48:13] Let me interrupt.

[48:13] I watched Reckless Kelly the first time I ever dropped acid.

[48:17] What?

[48:18] We watched Captain Ron and Reckless Kelly.

[48:21] And we also played a shitload of Killer Instinct in my friend John Klipstein's basement.

[48:26] And I remember watching it and being like, this is the funniest fucking movie I've ever seen in my life.

[48:33] And I was, like, quoting it for days.

[48:36] And I've never watched it again.

[48:38] Yeah, I don't think you should.

[48:39] I just remember there is a character named Robin Banks in it.

[48:43] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[48:44] Yeah, that's pretty good.

[48:45] It would only spoil your experience of Reckless Kelly.

[48:48] Which is a famous midnight movie.

Elliott Kalan

[48:52] People just dropping acid, getting high, going to see Reckless Kelly.

Dan McCoy

[48:56] Man.

[48:57] Described as the Australian Robin Hood.

[48:59] Kelly is a bank robber, a pop culture hero, and video shop owner.

[49:04] This modern story tells how he is furious when a Japanese company wants to buy his band's farm.

[49:10] So, I'm sure that's not insensitive in any way.

[49:13] Probably not.

[49:13] No.

[49:15] And the movie features such respected actors as Melora Hardin and Hugo Weaving.

[49:20] And, of course, it stars.

[49:21] Yeah, it's made in Australia.

[49:22] Yeah.

[49:23] It stars, was written, and directed by Australian comedian Yahoo Sirius during his brief flirtation

[49:29] with international success.

[49:30] And one tidbit from Yahoo Sirius' Wikipedia page.

[49:35] In August 2000, Yahoo Sirius sued the search engine Yahoo for trademark infringement.

[49:42] The case was thrown out because Sirius could not prove that he sells products or services under the name Yahoo

[49:47] and therefore could not prove that he suffered harm or confusion due to the search engine.

[49:53] So, a standing issue for Yahoo Sirius.

[49:56] He was unable to take his case to court.

[50:02] So, who do you think your birthday twin is in this whole morass, this whole mishmash of things?

Elliott Kalan

[50:09] I mean, it better be Yahoo Sirius, right?

Stuart Wellington

[50:12] Or Ned Kelly.

[50:14] Was it Ned Kelly?

[50:15] Stuart, you're correct.

Dan McCoy

[50:17] Your birthday twin is Ned Kelly.

[50:19] Oh, the actual person.

[50:20] The folk hero Australian outlaw who inspired Reckless Kelly.

[50:26] I don't have the last one here.

[50:29] I forgot to get the word here.

[50:30] Oh, you forgot to.

[50:31] Great.

Elliott Kalan

[50:32] I'll mention a missed opportunity, Dan, is you could have chosen Apocalypse Now because I am also a birthday twin with Joseph Conrad,

[50:40] whose book Heart of Darkness, Apocalypse Now is based on.

[50:42] Or you could have chosen any home movie of an old birthday since I have a twin.

[50:47] I have an actual birthday twin.

[50:49] A twin sister was born on the same day as me from the same womb.

Stuart Wellington

[50:54] But what movie was she in that I could point to?

[50:59] Yeah, yeah.

[50:59] What feature film?

Elliott Kalan

[51:02] Jurassic Park 3.

[51:03] Oh, okay.

[51:04] No, she wasn't really in that.

[51:06] If only.

[51:06] Wouldn't that be cool?

[51:07] That would be great.

[51:09] If she's just listed as additional dinosaur sounds.

Dan McCoy

[51:12] Yeah.

[51:13] Yeah.

[51:13] Ellie, what would you say you have in common with Ned Kelly?

[51:15] Just sort of an outlaw attitude?

Elliott Kalan

[51:17] Yeah, I mean, we're both rebels.

[51:19] We refuse to be tied down.

[51:21] We refuse to play by the rules.

[51:23] I feel like you do both those things a lot.

Dan McCoy

[51:25] Yeah, you get tied down and you play by the rules.

Elliott Kalan

[51:28] No, thanks.

[51:28] We're both Australian.

Dan McCoy

[51:31] Wow, he's gone way off.

Elliott Kalan

[51:33] We both have a last name that starts with K.

[51:34] You can't take that away from me.

[51:36] There you go.

Dan McCoy

[51:36] That's actually true.

[51:37] The letter K.

[51:38] Yep.

Elliott Kalan

[51:39] I share a couple letters with the famous outlaw Ned Kelly.

[51:44] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[51:45] Well, this was a podcast.

[51:47] No one could argue with that.

[51:49] No.

[51:49] Good try, but I think that factually you will find.

Elliott Kalan

[51:53] You'll be thrown out of court on a standing issue.

[51:55] Should you try?

[51:56] No, why are you suing us?

Stuart Wellington

[51:57] It would be like Yahoo Serious arguing that Yahoo, the search engine, can't exist.

Elliott Kalan

[52:01] That is, the idea that he has the rights to the word Yahoo is pretty ridiculous.

[52:05] That's a ridiculous argument, Yahoo Serious.

[52:07] Yeah.

[52:07] He could not be serious at that moment, right?

Stuart Wellington

[52:11] Yeah.

[52:11] He could have put a little more Chandler Bing on that line, but that's okay.

Dan McCoy

[52:15] Do you think he sells t-shirts that say, why so serious?

[52:19] And it's a picture of him, Yahoo Serious, perhaps?

[52:21] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[52:22] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[52:22] And his young Einstein hair, you know, gone crazy look.

Stuart Wellington

[52:26] Yeah, that he's in the bootleg t-shirt business.

[52:28] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[52:29] He's like, of himself.

[52:30] He's bootlegging his own face.

Stuart Wellington

[52:32] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[52:33] Yeah, he's like, dear boardwalk stores, I have a product for you.

[52:38] You know all those t-shirts of Marilyn Monroe with Photoshopped tattoos and pistols in her hands?

Dan McCoy

[52:46] In reparations, I demand a bunch of Rasta Bart shirts, please.

[52:50] Oh, man.

[52:51] Yeah.

[52:52] Nothing like a bootleg Bart.

Elliott Kalan

[52:54] I need at least one t-shirt of Mickey Mouse puffing on a joint.

[52:58] Thank you, love, why serious?

Stuart Wellington

[53:00] I want Rick and Morty, I don't know, dressed up in like something kind of cool, like cool clothes,

[53:07] maybe looking like they're rappers or something.

Elliott Kalan

[53:10] I will accept a Ninja Turtle shirt where the coloring is wrong and the bandanas are all the wrong color.

[53:16] Perfect.

[53:16] Or a t-shirt of Barack Obama as Superman dunking a basketball,

[53:21] which is a real shirt that I saw being sold on the streets of New York.

[53:24] That's amazing.

Dan McCoy

[53:26] Well, anyway, happy birthday to me in the future or the past when you're listening to this.

[53:31] And happy birthday to you guys when it comes around to your birthdays.

Stuart Wellington

[53:34] I mean, I guess it's both in the future and the past, Dan.

[53:37] I know.

[53:38] It happens once a year, too.

[53:39] Yeah.

[53:40] Paradox.

[53:41] So this is a tradition.

[53:43] From now on, you listeners should be listening to this episode on your birthday every year.

[53:47] Every year.

Dan McCoy

[53:49] Put it on.

[53:50] Your family will say, why are we doing this?

Stuart Wellington

[53:55] Turn your laptop speakers.

Dan McCoy

[53:57] Seems like a flimsy premise to build a tradition around.

Stuart Wellington

[54:01] Yeah, yeah.

[54:02] Aircast this podcast to your family's TV so they can't escape it.

Elliott Kalan

[54:06] Yeah.

[54:06] And just get ready for them to be confused when it abruptly switches subjects from Garfield to birthdays.

[54:12] Yeah, yeah.

[54:13] No, that's going to be everyone's favorite part every year.

[54:15] Make sure your fucking seatbelts are on.

[54:16] They'll be like, here it comes.

[54:18] You always bring a new person in who hasn't heard the episodes.

[54:21] You can watch them experiencing it.

[54:23] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[54:24] I thought this was about Garfield.

[54:25] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[54:26] Oh, no, my friend.

[54:26] It reminds me of the reaction video I saw years ago.

[54:29] Someone had taken Toy Story 3 and edited it so that as they're going into the furnace,

[54:34] it just fades to black and cuts to credits and showed that to their family.

[54:38] And their mom was like, what?

[54:40] That's it?

[54:41] That's how it ends?

Dan McCoy

[54:42] So good.

[54:43] What a great prank.

Elliott Kalan

[54:47] It means you have to watch all of Toy Story 3 to get to that moment.

[54:51] Toy Story 3 is a great movie.

[54:52] It's fun to watch.

[54:52] But the idea that we're going to sit down and watch this movie, you watch the whole thing,

[54:56] you change the ending.

Dan McCoy

[55:00] Well, think of this podcast as a prank we've played on you, the listener.

[55:04] Yeah.

[55:05] But like a fun one, one that you enjoyed.

[55:07] Oh, yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[55:08] One of those pranks where you're just like, oh, you guys, you know, come mad.

Dan McCoy

[55:12] What scamps?

[55:14] This is a podcast that's on the Maximum Fun Network.

[55:17] Go to MaximumFun.org to check out other great podcasts on our network.

[55:22] It is edited, produced, made to sound good by Alex Smith, who goes by the name Howell Doughty.

[55:31] Check out his new album, which was great.

[55:35] I listened to it just the other day and enjoyed it very much.

[55:39] Thank you for listening.

[55:41] Thank you for being with us.

[55:42] Tune in next week.

[55:43] But until then, I've been Dan McCoy.

Elliott Kalan

[55:46] I've been Stuart Wellington.

[55:47] And I've been not-birthday boy, Elliot Kalin.

Stuart Wellington

[55:51] So, wait a minute.

[55:53] Can there be scampis that don't have shrimp, or is scampi a shrimp-specific food?

[55:59] Let's look it up.

Dan McCoy

[56:01] It's the end of the episode.

[56:03] I'm turning the thing on.

Elliott Kalan

[56:03] I want that to be your new catchphrase, Dan.

[56:05] Let's look it up.

[56:06] Ha ha ha ha!

[56:08] Maximum Fun.

Dan McCoy

[56:14] A worker-owned network.

[56:15] Of artist-owned shows.

[56:17] Supported.

[56:18] Directly.

[56:19] By you.

FH Mini 106 - Birthday Twins

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