The Flop House: Episode 20 - Premonition

Dan McCoy

[0:00] On this episode of The Flophouse, we discuss Premonition, starring Sandra Bullock and a dead crow.

[0:30] Hey everyone, welcome to The Flophouse. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kalin. So Elliot's back. Yeah. Alright. That's about it. Boy, am I glad. Yeah, sure. Well, now that we've put that behind us, immediately.

Elliott Kalan

[0:47] The listeners can't hear, but in homage to the Backstreet's Back music video, I am dressed up as Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde in one body, split down the middle. And Stuart is a mummy, and Dan is also a mummy. I guess they didn't really coordinate that well.

Dan McCoy

[1:04] I thought you were dressed up as...

[1:06] I'm a sexy mummy.

[1:08] Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde, or what was that fucking...

[1:10] Starring Sean Young?

[1:11] Sean Young movie.

[1:12] Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde?

[1:12] Yeah, that's the one.

[1:13] Or maybe Jekyll and Hyde together again.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15] There's so many Jekyll and Hyde movies.

[1:17] Did you say femalian?

[1:19] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:20] We're not...

[1:20] No, we're not femalian.

[1:22] Come on.

[1:22] Elliot's dressed as Hekel and Jekyll, the racist crows.

[1:25] Sure.

[1:27] Pretty appropriately appropriate.

[1:28] Send him your hate mail.

[1:31] What movie did we watch tonight, Stuart?

Stuart Wellington

[1:33] We watched the movie called Premonition, starring Sandra Bullock.

[1:36] Ooh.

[1:37] And?

[1:38] And Julian McMahon from Nip Tuck, which is a fucking trashy program.

Dan McCoy

[1:44] Yeah, I prefer to think of him as Dr. Julian Von Doom.

[1:48] Oh my God.

[1:49] Wait, is it Julian?

[1:50] Is that what it's called?

[1:51] Yeah, Julian Von Doom.

Stuart Wellington

[1:54] Dictator of Latveria.

[1:55] Yeah, that's true.

[1:56] Yeah.

[1:57] Did I say it right this time, LA?

[1:58] Victor Von Doom.

[1:58] You did.

[1:59] I was glad that was corrected in the last podcast.

[2:01] Didn't Ultron destroy that?

Elliott Kalan

[2:03] No, that was a...

[2:04] He destroyed another country that was a fictional Eastern European country that was just created

[2:09] for that storyline.

[2:10] We are losing our few non-nerd listeners.

[2:13] He killed everyone in the country, and then the Avengers came to fight him, and Thor broke

[2:17] through the wall and said, Ultron, we would have words with thee.

[2:20] Oh, I saw that in Wizard.

[2:22] It was their moment of the year.

Dan McCoy

[2:25] Yeah.

[2:26] It was.

[2:27] I even like comics, and I'm passing out right now.

[2:30] No.

[2:31] It was the highlight of the Buziak-Perez run, but anyway, you were saying.

[2:34] Julian McMahon was Sandra Bullock's husband, and that's important because half the time,

[2:39] Sandra Bullock's husband was dead in this film.

[2:42] Yeah.

[2:42] Half the time, he was alive.

Elliott Kalan

[2:43] And not like you would think where he dies halfway through the movie.

[2:46] No.

[2:46] It was split up back and forth, jumping around a lot.

Dan McCoy

[2:48] That was pretty much the premise of the film.

[2:51] Can somebody...

[2:52] The premise of premonition.

Stuart Wellington

[2:54] Premiscition.

[2:55] That was almost a pun.

[2:56] It was not.

[2:56] Can somebody explain it for me?

[2:58] Because frankly, I got lost pretty quickly.

Elliott Kalan

[3:00] Basically.

[3:00] It's like Groundhog Day, but instead of Bill Murray's character learning how to love,

[3:05] it was Sandra Bullock's character learning, I don't know, that there was a god or something.

[3:10] Right.

[3:10] She wakes up one morning, and her husband is dead.

[3:12] And then she wakes up again the next day, and he's alive.

[3:15] And no one remembers that he was supposed to have died.

[3:17] And she starts jumping back and forth in time whenever she goes to sleep to the future

[3:21] of the past, all revolving around his dying in a car accident.

[3:25] And everything.

[3:26] Oh, there are all these things that she can't explain how they happened.

[3:29] And as she moves forward in time, they start to happen, and she's worried about her husband

[3:33] and so forth.

Dan McCoy

[3:34] You should also replace all the hilarious Bill Murray jokes with a lot of long shots of Sandra

[3:40] Bullock doing the laundry, driving her kids to school.

Elliott Kalan

[3:43] Yeah, picking up the groceries with her one friend.

Dan McCoy

[3:45] You know, just really normal, boring, suburban housewife sorts of things.

Elliott Kalan

[3:47] You really got the idea that she was a housewife in this.

[3:50] Also that she was afraid of dead birds.

Dan McCoy

[3:51] Yeah, she throws away a dead crow or something.

Elliott Kalan

[3:53] She finds one in her backyard, and she freaks out and smears blood all over the windows.

Dan McCoy

[3:56] Yeah, I want to talk about that.

[3:58] It's jumping ahead a little bit, but the scene where she falls on a dead crow, she's doing

[4:03] her laundry, she trips over something.

Elliott Kalan

[4:05] She's hanging her sheets up to dry in the backyard on a clothesline.

[4:09] Like a housewife.

[4:10] She's jumping back and forth between a couple days in the present, but in her backyard, I

[4:15] guess it's 1932.

[4:16] She doesn't have a dryer yet.

[4:18] How does she stand on top of her chores when she's jumping back and forth?

Dan McCoy

[4:21] These are like 1500 thread pound silk sheets.

[4:25] These are amazing sheets.

[4:26] These are not sheets you want to put in a dryer.

[4:28] Yeah, no.

[4:29] She's really got to put these sheets outside.

[4:31] All right.

[4:32] Yeah, that's what you do with good sheets.

Elliott Kalan

[4:33] But anyway, so she's hanging up sheets, and she trips and falls, and her hand falls on

[4:37] a dead bird.

[4:38] Gross.

[4:39] Gross.

Dan McCoy

[4:40] The film treats this as literally the worst thing that could ever happen.

[4:43] It's pretty gross.

Elliott Kalan

[4:43] And this is in a movie where she thinks her husband is dead, and her daughter appears,

[4:47] her young daughter appears with scars all over her face.

Dan McCoy

[4:50] That's to the point, Elliot.

[4:51] That's, uh...

[4:53] I mean, I agree with Stuart.

[4:54] If I, in the course of my normal day-to-day life, if I fell on a dead crow and got dead crow

[5:00] blood all over my hands, I would freak out.

[5:03] Yeah.

[5:03] But in a movie...

[5:04] Smeared on windows.

[5:05] Where my husband is dead, and then he's alive.

[5:07] Smear ashes on my face.

[5:08] She has bigger things to worry about than...

[5:10] And granted, if my husband was dead and alive, I'd be living a different lifestyle.

[5:13] But also, I assume that I would love my gay husband in that situation.

Stuart Wellington

[5:17] Would Julian McMahon be your husband?

[5:19] Oh, I could only hope.

[5:20] Yeah, I think he'd do it, dude.

[5:21] You saw he had some guns.

Elliott Kalan

[5:22] He wore that sleeveless shirt at one point.

Stuart Wellington

[5:24] Yeah, I think that's called a wife-beater, Elliot.

Elliott Kalan

[5:26] Well, we can't assume that the character beat his wife, but they did have a bad relationship.

[5:30] Yeah, but that's the name of the shirt.

[5:31] So is it...

Stuart Wellington

[5:32] Yeah, I think you could...

[5:33] I think you could pull Julian McMahon.

[5:34] Like, he's got kind of weird eyebrows, and...

[5:37] You think I could pull Julian McMahon?

Dan McCoy

[5:40] Yeah, I don't think that's going too...

Elliott Kalan

[5:41] You're not punching too above your weight class on that one.

[5:43] Yeah, thanks.

Dan McCoy

[5:44] Yeah, I appreciate that.

Stuart Wellington

[5:45] Just a little bit.

[5:46] Okay, so she smashes a crow, and it's gross, and then she throws it away.

[5:50] She runs inside.

[5:51] In a Native American crow burial ceremony of throwing it in the garbage.

Dan McCoy

[5:56] But she manages to smear crow blood all over the sliding glass doors on her way inside.

[6:01] She's got bigger things on her mind than keeping her windows clean, dude.

[6:05] If I had crow blood all over me, I think I'd be pretty careful about that.

Elliott Kalan

[6:08] You'd be like, oh, let me use my other hand to open this.

Dan McCoy

[6:11] Like, I freaked out, but let's keep her head.

[6:14] More ominous that way, dude.

Elliott Kalan

[6:14] I think the theme of the movie was Sandra Bullock freaking out at things, and then staring

[6:19] pensively, and other people overreacting to her freaking out.

[6:22] She wakes up, and her husband is dead.

[6:24] Wakes up again.

[6:25] Her husband's alive.

[6:26] Wakes up again.

[6:26] Her husband's dead, and the funeral's going on.

[6:28] And she's confused.

[6:29] Like, what happened?

[6:30] How did this happen?

[6:32] Ah, I don't believe that he's really dead.

[6:33] And they're like, oh, honey, well, we better submit you to a mental hospital, and then that'll

[6:37] make you better.

Dan McCoy

[6:38] I think the mayor is there as the world's creepiest therapist.

Elliott Kalan

[6:41] The world's creepiest and least important to the plot therapist.

[6:44] Yeah.

[6:45] You could have removed him from the movie, and it would not have changed things very much.

Dan McCoy

[6:48] Yeah, but immediately upon her freaking out at her husband's funeral, a place where I

[6:52] assume that people freak out.

Elliott Kalan

[6:55] What's great, at the funeral, she demands that they open the casket to show her so that

[7:01] she knows for sure that her husband's dead.

[7:03] And this is actually...

[7:04] That's against protocol, dude.

[7:05] I think that's actually...

[7:07] Usually they do allow you some time with the body before the burial so that you can make

[7:12] peace.

[7:12] Not out in the street, dude.

Elliott Kalan

[7:12] Against protocol.

[7:12] Well, it is out in the street, but they should have let her see the body before that.

[7:15] But this is how unprofessional these morticians are, is they start unloading the coffin to

[7:19] agree to this demand, and they let it slip out of their hands, and it falls and shatters,

[7:24] and his head rolls out of the coffin.

[7:26] And that's bad embalment right there.

[7:29] You should have attached the head.

Dan McCoy

[7:30] It's not bad embalming.

[7:31] It's bad...

Elliott Kalan

[7:32] Even if it's a closed casket funeral.

Dan McCoy

[7:34] It's a mortician-ery.

[7:36] I mean, like, they should have sewed the head back on.

[7:37] But that's part of the embalming process.

[7:38] The actual embalming, I'm assuming.

[7:40] Maybe they did a great job...

[7:41] The replacement of the fluids.

Elliott Kalan

[7:42] Keeping the tissue fresh for the burial, but his head...

[7:45] Come on, they didn't even reattach.

[7:46] It's literally like...

[7:47] And the people holding the coffin slip...

[7:49] It slips out of their hands so easily.

[7:50] It's like the whole funeral home is run by interns or something.

[7:54] Sorry.

[7:55] Sorry.

[7:55] He's just here for the summer.

[7:56] Oh, man.

Stuart Wellington

[7:57] The thing is, in their defense, I mean, the way it was shot, you just saw the thing crash

[8:02] on the ground and then a head bounce off the ground.

[8:04] That could have been somebody throwing a novelty joke head on the ground.

[8:07] That's true.

[8:08] Or it could have been someone else's head.

[8:09] I don't know.

[8:09] They...

[8:09] I mean, they didn't really introduce, like, a prankster character, but...

[8:12] They didn't introduce...

[8:14] They didn't say that there weren't pranksters in the town, so...

Elliott Kalan

[8:17] You have to assume that they're there unless they're said otherwise.

Dan McCoy

[8:19] There's a whole subplot that was cut about how this was, like, a crooked funeral home,

[8:24] and they're burying as many people in one casket as possible.

[8:27] Oh, I thought there was a subplot about how...

Elliott Kalan

[8:28] That town is the rubberhead capital of America, and there's a bad economy, so the rubberhead

[8:34] factory's going under.

[8:36] So I guess to gin up publicity for the rubberheads, remind people they should buy them, they're

[8:40] just chucking them into the street.

[8:42] And that scene makes much less sense because they removed that.

Dan McCoy

[8:45] It was a failed promotion.

[8:46] People were freaking out.

[8:48] There were a lot of car accidents.

[8:49] People were, like, swerving to avoid what they assumed were real heads.

[8:51] Were real heads, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[8:53] And you were mentioning how the pallbearers in this situation were all interns, and it

[8:58] seemed like almost every professional in this movie that filled any kind of, like, role

[9:01] was, like, underage.

[9:03] It was ridiculously young.

[9:04] They all looked like they were, like, 17.

Elliott Kalan

[9:05] The priest at the funeral home...

[9:07] The priest at the funeral looked like he was about 16, and we see an old priest later on.

[9:11] I don't know why they just didn't, you know, save a salary, buddy.

[9:14] Have that same actor do two parts.

Stuart Wellington

[9:16] I thought that guy was studying, right?

[9:18] He was studying up on...

[9:19] The old priest was studying up on premonition-based miracles.

[9:22] He was too busy reading about occult legends.

Elliott Kalan

[9:25] They go to an insurance office a couple times because it's a semi-clue, and the guy running

[9:30] the place is kind of like B.J.

[9:32] Novak in the first season of The Office.

[9:33] Like, he just looks much too young to be doing the job he's supposed to be doing.

Dan McCoy

[9:38] But the point originally was that Peter Stormare...

[9:42] He's not a young professional, by the way.

[9:43] No, he's an old professional.

[9:45] He's wearing...

[9:46] He's got the creepiest haircut you can imagine.

Elliott Kalan

[9:48] Yeah, well, he's got a beard and a real short hair.

Dan McCoy

[9:50] Real short hair and basically, like, shaved sides to his hair.

Elliott Kalan

[9:52] Yeah, it looks like it was like, oh, you called me away from my survivalist militia?

[9:58] I got to put her into the hospital?

Dan McCoy

[10:00] I thought you were going to say, you called me away in the middle of my barbering.

[10:04] In the middle of shaving my head?

[10:05] My head shaved.

[10:07] And they just shaved around from ear to ear.

[10:09] And then they stopped.

Elliott Kalan

[10:10] The good, the bad, and the ugly when the guy gets up from the barber chair and he's half

[10:13] shaved and he points the gun at Clint Eastwood.

Dan McCoy

[10:15] But she's immediately brought to...

[10:18] Like, she's basically committed.

[10:20] Yes.

[10:20] And she's not taken to, like, you know, a nice hospital where, like, oh, you know, you

[10:24] got to calm down a little.

[10:25] We're going to give you some, like, some Xanax or Valium or whatever.

[10:29] It's like, no, we're immediately taking you to, like, this is, like, session nine.

Elliott Kalan

[10:33] They cover to a bench in a hallway.

[10:35] Then they strap her to a table and start injecting, I guess, a sedative or something.

[10:39] Maybe it's sodium pentothal to find out if she'll tell the truth.

[10:42] Nurse Ratched is in charge.

[10:44] It's really sort of alarming.

[10:45] But all she's done is kind of react violently to the fact that her husband has died, which

[10:49] seems like a normal thing.

Stuart Wellington

[10:50] I think they were injecting the black stuff from the Alien.

[10:53] From X-Files?

[10:54] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[10:55] Alien's, X-Files, same shit.

[10:56] We had to check the credits to see if Peter Stormer was playing Alex Krychek.

[11:01] But X-Files, the movie, coming out this summer.

Dan McCoy

[11:04] Maybe they'll sponsor us.

[11:06] Chris Carter?

Elliott Kalan

[11:07] Chris Carter's Harsh Realm this summer on Fox.

Dan McCoy

[11:10] Millennium out on DVD.

[11:12] Viper.

Elliott Kalan

[11:13] This summer on Fox.

Stuart Wellington

[11:15] Millennium is on Fox.

[11:17] It's on DVD.

[11:18] Viper was in a Chris Carter show.

[11:20] Wasn't that with a...

[11:21] Lance Henriksen.

[11:21] Pumpkinhead, yeah.

[11:22] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[11:23] Well, Pumpkinhead is technically the monster from Pumpkinhead.

[11:26] Lance Henriksen is the human character.

Stuart Wellington

[11:28] It's gotten all screwed up like Frankenstein.

Elliott Kalan

[11:31] Yeah.

[11:32] You meet him.

[11:33] I want you to...

[11:33] Backwards.

[11:34] Say, hey, Pumpkinhead.

[11:35] It's nice to meet you.

Stuart Wellington

[11:36] I declare, but...

Dan McCoy

[11:37] Did I watch...

[11:38] You're my favorite actor, Pumpkinhead.

Elliott Kalan

[11:40] A lot of people that make that mistake.

[11:42] I'm actually Dr. Pumpkinhead.

[11:44] The monster was Pumpkinhead.

[11:46] But I want you to call him Pumpkinhead and then think that Pumpkinhead was actually the

[11:50] movie Pumpkin with Christina Ricci where she falls in love with the retarded guy.

[11:54] And Lance Henriksen will say, there's a number of different problems you're having with this

[11:58] right now.

[11:59] Benny and June is too crazy, Peter.

Dan McCoy

[12:00] Let me explain several things.

[12:03] Number one, let me explain the difference between an actor and his part.

[12:06] Number two, let me explain the difference between the word pumpkin and Pumpkinhead.

Elliott Kalan

[12:09] So does Pumpkinhead live with you now or what's the problem?

[12:12] What is it?

[12:13] Wait, wait, wait.

Stuart Wellington

[12:13] If Benny and June wasn't the movie where two retarded people fall in love, what was that

[12:17] movie with Giovanni Ribisi?

[12:19] No, that was the other sister.

[12:20] Oh, okay.

[12:21] And that's...

[12:21] There's retarded people in that movie, right?

[12:23] You're thinking of Untamed Heart.

[12:25] No.

[12:25] No, that's the difference.

[12:27] That's the movie where that guy gets the baboon heart.

[12:30] Yeah.

[12:30] That guy being Christmas later, right?

Elliott Kalan

[12:31] According to the screen entertainment circuit in 1998, your original title was Baboon Heart.

[12:35] Nice.

[12:36] No.

[12:36] Well, you're thinking of Frequency starring Jim Caviezel.

Stuart Wellington

[12:39] But anyway...

[12:40] Wait, he's retarded?

Dan McCoy

[12:43] Oh, he was in that Big Fish movie, right?

[12:45] Based on his performance in Passion of the Christ.

[12:47] But anyway, let's get back to...

Elliott Kalan

[12:48] Always with your anti-religious sentiment, Dan, which brings me to the surprising religious

[12:55] theme of premonition.

Dan McCoy

[12:57] So after a while, flipping back and forth...

Elliott Kalan

[12:59] It's like you're changing the channels between...

[13:01] It's like when I was growing up, Channel 11 and TBS would both show Saved by the Bell,

[13:05] but TBS would start five minutes later.

[13:08] So if it was the same episode of Saved by the Bell, you could watch five minutes, then

[13:11] flip back to TBS and watch the same five minutes.

[13:13] This was like that.

[13:14] Like, premonition was on two different channels, and you were flipping back and forth between

[13:18] them.

[13:18] Right.

Dan McCoy

[13:19] One had started at 6 o'clock, and one had started...

[13:22] At like 6.15.

[13:23] Yeah, exactly.

[13:24] It didn't feel like a well-made movie.

Stuart Wellington

[13:25] I think that would have fit more if one channel was showing the early years of Saved by the

[13:29] Bell, where they're still in Indiana.

[13:31] Yeah, okay.

[13:31] And Hayley Mills was still the teacher.

Dan McCoy

[13:34] Yeah.

[13:35] Back when it was Good Morning, Miss Bliss.

[13:36] Sure, yeah.

[13:37] Oh, man.

[13:38] That reveals a lot about us.

[13:41] I would...

Elliott Kalan

[13:41] Listen, if we want to talk about Saved by the Bell, I'm not ashamed.

[13:43] How did the whole school and all the students move to California?

[13:46] That's what I want to know.

[13:47] That is really weird.

Stuart Wellington

[13:47] What I think is sad is that when the class, when they're graduating, they put together

[13:52] a time capsule, the only people who put anything in it are the main characters.

[13:58] This is sad.

[13:58] They're really the only students at this school.

Dan McCoy

[14:00] I'm just sad that you're asked to sympathize with basically a dick.

[14:04] Like, the main character of Saved by the Bell.

[14:06] Zach Morris is a dick?

[14:06] What are you talking about?

Elliott Kalan

[14:07] He was a Dopey Gillis for the 90s, or the late 80s, I guess.

[14:10] That guy.

[14:11] What?

[14:11] He had a cool phone.

[14:12] It was a big, gray, blocky mobile phone.

[14:15] And he could stop time.

[14:16] He could stop time occasionally to talk to the audience.

[14:18] Sure.

[14:19] He was friends with a nerd and a jock.

[14:21] He could bridge the gap.

[14:22] Yep.

[14:22] Yeah, but he wasn't really friends with the nerd.

[14:25] And his girlfriend.

[14:25] He was better friends with the nerd than he was with the jock.

Stuart Wellington

[14:28] And his girlfriend at one point left him for an older guy who worked at the Max.

[14:32] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[14:33] And he was kind enough to take in a homeless family into his house on Christmas, though

[14:36] they were never heard or seen of again.

Dan McCoy

[14:38] You're not going to sell me a Zack Morris, so we should get back to the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[14:40] He was in that Sci-Fi Channel original movie about the Frankenstein monster.

[14:44] Again, you're confusing the actor.

[14:46] That's what it was called.

[14:46] Sure, that sounds right.

[14:47] He was on NYPD Blue.

[14:48] No.

[14:49] Zach Morris is a good guy.

[14:50] He's a cop now.

[14:50] Different.

Dan McCoy

[14:51] No, just the same actor.

[14:53] Mark Paul Gosseler.

[14:55] Gosselier.

[14:55] Ryan Gosling?

Elliott Kalan

[14:56] Well, should we skip to the ending or should we keep talking?

Dan McCoy

[14:58] Well, no, I think...

[15:00] Before we skip to the ending...

[15:01] I'm surprised, Stuart.

[15:03] Before we skip to the ending, we should talk about what you started to bring up, which is

[15:07] the surprising religious content to this film.

Elliott Kalan

[15:11] After all the switching back and forth for time, she talks...

Stuart Wellington

[15:13] Frankly, I thought it was a breath of fresh air.

[15:17] I thought this movie was a little religious.

Elliott Kalan

[15:19] Finally.

[15:20] Religious?

[15:21] Finally, Hollywood.

[15:22] Holly weird.

[15:23] Yeah, tell me about it.

[15:24] Holly would, W-O-U-L-D.

[15:26] Forget about God if they could, but they can't.

[15:30] But she goes...

[15:31] She is having premonitions, she realizes.

[15:33] She puts together a chart of the days of the week and marks off what she knows happens each

[15:39] day.

[15:39] This is the only clever thing in the entire movie.

Dan McCoy

[15:41] Yeah, no, I like it.

[15:42] She pulls out a piece of butcher paper and basically just...

[15:46] Crow blood still on her.

[15:47] Yeah, just like a little chart.

[15:50] Like you might, you know, just your average list of things.

Elliott Kalan

[15:53] Like a Hollywood screenwriter trying to figure out his fucking complicated movie that he can't

[15:57] keep track of.

Dan McCoy

[15:57] Like, what day does this thing happen on?

[16:00] Jack Nicholson was writing this movie, apparently.

Elliott Kalan

[16:03] Oh, jeez, I'm writing this movie.

[16:05] What day is it going on?

[16:07] Sandra, I got a good part for it and so forth.

[16:10] I do the worst Jack Nicholson impression.

Stuart Wellington

[16:11] That was really bad, actually.

[16:13] Yeah, I do.

[16:13] Come on, Dan.

[16:14] Where are you at?

[16:15] Where's your Michael Caine or something?

Dan McCoy

[16:17] I think that this premonition film was the greatest film since The Swarm.

Elliott Kalan

[16:23] People ask me all the time, what's this premonition about, Alfie?

[16:26] I can't tell them.

[16:27] I can't.

[16:28] Well, you see, and so forth.

[16:30] Anyway, so she puts together this chart.

[16:32] She knows she's jumping back and forth through time somehow.

[16:35] She goes to...

[16:36] And you...

[16:37] Okay, you realize you're seeing the future.

[16:39] You don't know what to do.

[16:41] You can't go to the psychologist because he's just going to lock you up.

[16:43] Who do you go to?

[16:44] The family priest who's never been introduced in the film before.

[16:47] Absolutely.

[16:48] And he happens to have a book called, I assume, Premonitions Through History that has different

[16:54] examples of famous premonitions that have happened in legend.

[16:57] Bookmarked with post-it notes.

[16:58] Bookmarked with...

[16:58] And I wondered if the actor bookmarked it or the character bookmarked it.

[17:02] If he was supposed to remove those before shooting started.

[17:04] One of the same.

[17:04] So if you have an occult question, go to your priest because I guess they're all involved

[17:09] in the black arts.

Dan McCoy

[17:09] Well, you know, everything supernatural is the same.

[17:12] Ghosts.

[17:13] Goblins.

Elliott Kalan

[17:14] Ghosts and goblins.

[17:15] The Illuminati.

Dan McCoy

[17:17] Wolfmans.

[17:18] Jesus.

[17:19] It's all the same thing.

[17:20] Aliens.

Elliott Kalan

[17:21] Aliens.

[17:21] Jesus.

[17:22] Poltergeists.

[17:23] And Polterghosts.

[17:24] All the same thing.

Dan McCoy

[17:26] The real Ghostbusters.

Elliott Kalan

[17:28] The real Ghostbusters.

[17:29] And the other Ghostbusters that had a gorilla.

[17:31] Yeah.

[17:32] Which ironically predated the real Ghostbusters.

[17:36] Boogeyman.

[17:38] Man's Chinese Theater.

Stuart Wellington

[17:39] The Tooth Fairy.

[17:40] And Sandy Claws.

Elliott Kalan

[17:42] Man Thing.

[17:43] And Batman Thing.

[17:45] Okay.

[17:45] Howard the Duck.

Dan McCoy

[17:46] It's all part of the same thing.

[17:48] All part of the...

[17:48] General.

[17:49] Supernatural.

[17:50] Sure.

Stuart Wellington

[17:50] So I would go to my priest to talk about that stuff, right Dan?

[17:53] Apparently.

[17:54] Okay.

[17:54] Dan, I assume you're the most Christian of any of us.

Dan McCoy

[17:57] My father was a minister.

[17:59] My uncle's a minister.

[18:00] My two grandfathers were both ministers.

Elliott Kalan

[18:03] So would you...

[18:04] Do any of them have books about premonitions?

Dan McCoy

[18:06] Oh man, all over the house.

[18:07] It's premonitions through history.

[18:10] It's medieval premonitions.

[18:11] It's premonitions in the modern world.

[18:13] I have to imagine...

[18:14] You get forwarded emails like,

Stuart Wellington

[18:16] Hey, check out this information about a cool new premonition I heard about.

Dan McCoy

[18:19] You've got so many copies of the Necronomicon just lying around.

[18:22] Holy shit.

Elliott Kalan

[18:23] I imagine when you join the seminary, the first textbooks are the time...

[18:25] Written by the mad Arab?

[18:26] Are the...

[18:27] Abdul Alhazrad?

[18:28] Yes.

[18:29] The first books they give you are the Time, Life, Mysteries, and Wonders series.

[18:33] Yeah.

[18:33] They say, you're here to preach the word of the Lord and to testify for Christ.

[18:39] Read about how aliens built the pyramids.

Dan McCoy

[18:41] But let's tell the audience, though, about the fucking great advice that the priest gives Sandra Bullock.

[18:47] Do what you might remember better than me.

[18:49] I was drinking.

[18:50] It was something about, like, your faith has lapsed, so something is coming to fill the void.

[18:55] Or something like that.

Elliott Kalan

[18:56] Something is coming to fill the void.

[18:57] And she says, sounds like a curse.

[18:59] And he goes, or maybe a miracle.

[19:01] So it's a miracle that she is basically Billy Pilgrimed and unstuck in time and doesn't know what the fuck is happening.

[19:07] But also it's, like, a really mean miracle.

Dan McCoy

[19:09] It's, like, she's being punished for not going to church by, like, getting premonitions of her husband's death.

[19:15] And maybe it's, like...

[19:16] And it's a really sort of, like, vague way of God asserting his will.

[19:20] Like, you haven't been to church in a while.

Elliott Kalan

[19:23] Maybe your husband should die and you should know about it ahead of time.

[19:26] But also, like, she didn't strike me as particularly irreligious.

[19:30] Like, she didn't go to church, but there was never a conversation like, oh, we gotta go to church.

[19:34] Nah, forget that.

[19:35] What's this, a cross?

[19:36] Psss.

[19:37] Like, pee is all over it.

[19:38] But also, like, let's just talk on a basic screenplay level.

Dan McCoy

[19:41] This, like, stinks to high heaven of, like, the screenwriter's like, all right, I got this awesome premise that could go somewhere.

[19:47] I gotta explain it somehow.

[19:49] I got nothing.

[19:50] I guess I'll say God, dude.

[19:52] Yeah, it's God.

[19:53] God.

Stuart Wellington

[19:54] I got the audience in the seat for an hour or so.

[19:58] I better explain what's going on.

[20:00] At 6 o'clock, I put in a full day of writing.

Dan McCoy

[20:03] It's God.

[20:04] Time to have a few beers.

Elliott Kalan

[20:05] By this point, they're gonna be so wrapped up in the amazingly intricate and enthralling story,

[20:09] they're gonna swallow whatever bullshit I can shovel down their throats.

[20:12] Oh, God, you devil.

Dan McCoy

[20:14] Who starred in Oh, God, you devil, by the way?

[20:16] George Burns?

[20:17] No, the other guy.

[20:18] The other guy, the guy who was, it was the guy from Blossom.

[20:21] The guy from Blossom.

[20:21] My ambialik?

Stuart Wellington

[20:22] Yes.

[20:23] The dad.

[20:23] I don't have a dictionary definition of the term miracle, but I think, if I recall.

Elliott Kalan

[20:27] It's when the U.S. team defeats a Russian team in the 1980 Winter Olympics hockey.

Dan McCoy

[20:32] That's a good example.

[20:33] It's in Webster's.

[20:34] Or it's in the smile of a small child.

[20:36] Or it's a perfectly brewed cup of coffee.

Elliott Kalan

[20:39] Or it's going to CVS Pharmacy, because it's just another ordinary miracle today, according to the ads.

Dan McCoy

[20:46] Or it's the laughter of your loved ones.

[20:48] So, wait, would your husband die in the car?

[20:50] Or it's a kind of whip.

[20:51] Or it's a kind of whip.

[20:53] Miracle whip.

[20:54] But it's the kind of...

[20:55] These are all miracles, according to the Bible.

Elliott Kalan

[20:57] The movie posits, I guess, anything God does is a miracle, even if it's bad.

Stuart Wellington

[21:01] Yeah, well, any time it's magic-related, right?

[21:04] Yes, anything magic-related.

[21:05] That's basically it.

Elliott Kalan

[21:06] Yeah, if they find a quarter behind your ear, it's a miracle.

Dan McCoy

[21:08] Maybe the priest is just like we are in this situation.

[21:11] Maybe the priest is just like, uh, fuck Defino, that sounds really weird.

[21:14] I guess God's in charge.

Elliott Kalan

[21:16] I assume the priest was going, quit in time, time to punch out.

[21:19] And then Sandra Bullock walked in, and he was like, oh, come on.

[21:23] Seriously, God?

[21:23] I've been doing this all day.

[21:25] And she was like, I'm unstuck in time, and I know my husband's going to die.

[21:28] I guess it's a miracle.

[21:29] Quit in time, punch out.

[21:30] Let's go get a couple brews, Jesus.

Stuart Wellington

[21:32] It's Miller done, Jesus.

Elliott Kalan

[21:34] It's half past beer.

[21:36] I know you're the son of a carpenter, but it's Miller time.

Dan McCoy

[21:39] Okay, so there's not a lot to talk about in this movie, so let's skip to the ending, which

[21:42] is the most awesome part by far.

Elliott Kalan

[21:45] Okay, so it turned out that her husband was going to have an affair on her, but she figured

[21:49] it out and proved that she loved him by doing him and taking his shoes off.

[21:53] So he skipped out on the affair.

[21:56] That's accurate.

[21:56] Taking his shoes off was a big component of it.

[21:58] He's in his car.

[22:00] He's driving to – he dropped the kids off at school, as they do, and he's in his car.

[22:05] He's going to die in a car crash.

[22:06] She calls him, and there's about, what, 15 minutes of him fumbling with the cell phone

[22:10] while his car swerves around.

Dan McCoy

[22:11] Yeah, she's like, okay, I know he's going to die at mile 220.

[22:15] I'm going to go out.

[22:16] I'm going to drive out.

[22:16] I'm going to meet him there.

[22:17] She's, like, calling him on the phone.

[22:19] She's like, oh, just trust me.

[22:21] Turn around.

[22:22] And he, like, turns around, and a car sort of swerves around, and you're like, oh, it's

[22:24] all right.

[22:25] And then –

[22:26] And then –

[22:27] Whoops, I dropped my phone.

Elliott Kalan

[22:28] He drops his phone.

Dan McCoy

[22:29] Whoops, my phone.

[22:29] My car stole.

[22:30] And then he says –

[22:31] What's happening?

Elliott Kalan

[22:31] The car won't start.

[22:33] And then a tractor – an 18-wheeler starts coming down the bend.

Dan McCoy

[22:38] Very flammable.

[22:39] Apparently.

[22:39] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[22:40] And he's like, I don't know whether to pick up my phone or start the car.

[22:43] Get out of my car.

[22:44] Ah!

Dan McCoy

[22:44] Yeah, he doesn't simply unbuckle and run out of the car.

[22:48] Which I think is –

[22:48] Which a normal person would do.

[22:49] Really the number one –

Elliott Kalan

[22:50] Well, he loved that car.

Dan McCoy

[22:52] He really did.

[22:52] He really loved that car.

[22:53] That was established in the film.

[22:55] That was –

Elliott Kalan

[22:55] So then he got – well, and then let's just say that we're like, well, of course he's

[23:00] going to live.

[23:01] Why would God put her through this and not – and he doesn't cheat on his wife.

[23:05] They've reaffirmed their love for each other.

[23:07] I guess she's going to go to church more often.

[23:09] Of course he's going to live, and this is going to be a happy ending.

[23:11] Nope.

[23:12] That big truck smashes through the roof of his car, and you're like, oh, okay.

[23:17] Well, he's still going to be okay.

[23:18] Maybe he ducked on the point of impact or something.

[23:20] No.

[23:20] Truck blows up.

[23:21] Car blows up also.

[23:23] And you're still holding out hope that he's going to crawl out.

Stuart Wellington

[23:25] It was basically a big exclamation point on this movie.

Dan McCoy

[23:29] Well, it's very strange because it's this weird – like, awesome.

[23:33] It's this weird Twilight Zone ending where you're sort of supposed to be like, oh, I see in

[23:39] this time loop she sort of caused his death by knowing about his death.

Elliott Kalan

[23:44] But there were so many coincidental little things that had to happen.

Dan McCoy

[23:48] Well, but not even that.

[23:49] Like, just like that sort of chilling ending doesn't work if you've set up the idea that

[23:53] the whole point of this is that God is testing her or something.

Elliott Kalan

[23:56] Yeah.

[23:57] You know, like –

[23:57] God comes off very badly in this film.

Dan McCoy

[24:00] Yeah.

[24:01] Like, what's the whole point of the scene with the priest if the end is just going to be

[24:04] one of these, like, twists the knife like, well, Sandra Bullock, if you hadn't stopped

[24:07] him on the road, he would have died.

[24:08] It's not over, though.

Elliott Kalan

[24:09] She wakes up the next day.

[24:10] They're moving out of the house that he bought for them because, I guess, too many memories.

[24:14] And –

Dan McCoy

[24:15] Well, no, it's not the next day because, like, the –

[24:17] Probably.

[24:18] No.

[24:18] Oh, no.

[24:19] It's several days later because the funeral has happened and –

[24:21] No.

[24:21] And the daughter's face scars –

[24:23] The daughter's face scars have almost healed.

[24:23] Oh, that's right.

Elliott Kalan

[24:24] The daughter ran through a plate glass window also.

[24:26] It starts raining out and Sandra Bullock, of course, loses her shit because she does

[24:31] with everything.

[24:32] It starts raining and she starts yelling at the children to get inside, get inside.

[24:34] She's got any of those fancy sheets, though.

[24:36] And she has to run out and get the sheets that she hung up and her daughter is running

[24:39] to the glass door to open it to go get the sheets and she's going, no, stop, stop.

[24:44] And the daughter turns around to look at what Sandra Bullock is – what fucking nonsense

[24:48] is causing her to scream at her and she doesn't see the glass door and runs right through it

[24:52] and gets all cut up in her face.

Dan McCoy

[24:54] Right.

[24:54] And then at the end of the movie, the scars are almost healed, which leads me to believe

[24:57] that this happens –

[24:57] Oh, they've been there for a while.

[24:58] Like a month later, which is also why Sandra Bullock isn't committed in the hospital

[25:03] at this point.

[25:03] And also why – oh, that's right.

Stuart Wellington

[25:04] Because, well, God is involved, so maybe it was a miracle that her scars healed up the

[25:09] next day.

[25:09] That's possible.

Elliott Kalan

[25:10] But she goes – she sits on the edge of her bed.

[25:12] She's woken up by her daughter.

[25:13] She sits on the edge of her bed and she remembers everything that happened in the movie.

[25:17] And then we hear the –

Dan McCoy

[25:19] Which, by the way, she remembers stuff that happened – again, this has happened before

[25:23] in the flop house.

[25:24] Things that happened like ten minutes earlier in the film.

[25:27] And I don't understand what modern filmmakers think our attention span is.

[25:33] They're just like, remember this?

[25:34] Remember when Sandra Bullock and her husband kissed?

[25:38] They were really in love.

[25:39] It was actually pretty helpful for me because I had to get a beer.

[25:43] Well, she didn't realize that Sandra Bullock and her husband were in love.

[25:45] So seeing them kiss –

[25:46] No, I thought they were enemies.

Stuart Wellington

[25:47] I thought she was trying to call them on the phone and distract them so that car would

[25:51] chop us out.

Elliott Kalan

[25:52] Which was – for a long time in the movie, nothing really happens and it does seem like

[25:55] it's –

[25:55] Too successful.

[25:55] It's designed for someone who keeps getting up and leaving and coming back.

Dan McCoy

[25:59] It's a whole lot of nothing followed by a whole lot of something.

[26:02] And then –

Stuart Wellington

[26:03] What I was wondering was like, because this movie is kind of told in a wake, it's kind

[26:06] of told out of order.

[26:07] Like, do they film it like in order?

[26:10] And then they're just like, let's just chop it all up.

[26:11] It's cool.

[26:12] I don't think so.

[26:12] And like, second of all, like, on the air and see how it comes down.

[26:15] Well, and we're talking about fucking Groundhog Day.

[26:18] Like, they don't ever address her point of view so that you're like – there's no

[26:22] moment where you see that realization on her face like, oh my god, when I go to sleep,

[26:27] it's a different day.

[26:28] That's true.

[26:29] Like, there's no moment where she's like, maybe, maybe if – like, little cause and

[26:34] effect here.

[26:34] Maybe if I don't fall asleep, nothing crazy will happen.

[26:38] There's a dead-on Sandra Bullock impression.

[26:40] I know.

[26:40] I watched Demolition Man this weekend.

[26:43] So there's no moment of her being like –

[26:45] Let me test this or something.

[26:46] There's no testing or like trying to figure out the like –

[26:49] The rules.

[26:50] The rules.

[26:50] Instead, she's like, I don't get something.

[26:53] Time to go to my local church and talk to my favorite priest.

[26:56] Oh, God's doing it.

[26:57] Okay.

[26:57] You would prefer if she –

Dan McCoy

[26:58] I guess I'll try –

[26:58] It was more of like a scientific method behind her.

[27:00] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[27:01] She does – I will say it's the – she does go to godless science first, Peter Stormare.

[27:05] He fails her, and then she goes back to faith.

[27:08] I don't know if he fails her.

Dan McCoy

[27:08] He gives her lithium.

[27:09] I mean, that's pretty good.

Elliott Kalan

[27:10] And then she takes – it says take two, and she pours out every single pill in her

[27:14] hand and then throws them in the sink.

[27:16] And it's like, what?

[27:17] I don't – anyway.

[27:18] But okay.

[27:18] So she's sitting on the edge of the bed.

[27:20] She's remembering everything we just saw in the movie.

[27:22] She was a psych major, by the way.

[27:23] Weird.

[27:24] So she knows lithium's not that good for you.

[27:26] And she remembers the priest's words that this is a miracle and something about hope.

[27:30] I forget which.

[27:31] She closes her eyes in slow motion, gets up, and she's pregnant.

[27:35] That night of last love with her husband has borne fruit, as God meant it to.

Dan McCoy

[27:40] Cut to black credits.

Elliott Kalan

[27:42] And that's the end of the movie.

[27:43] No closure.

[27:44] And thanks to God's benevolence, she's now a single mother raising three young children.

Stuart Wellington

[27:49] Single housewife?

Elliott Kalan

[27:51] Although it's implied that –

[27:52] Yeah, yeah.

[27:52] She doesn't have a job.

[27:53] It's implied that her husband has a major life insurance policy.

Dan McCoy

[27:57] Oh, yeah.

[27:58] If I know anything about insurance companies, they found it very suspicious that he took out this insurance policy right before he died and did not pay off on it.

Elliott Kalan

[28:05] That's covered when she goes to the insurance company guy in the middle and he says, this is very suspicious.

Stuart Wellington

[28:11] But whatever.

[28:12] Shit happens, man.

[28:13] You were there calling him on the phone.

[28:15] So what you're saying –

[28:16] I got to go acting him while a car was smashing the dead.

Elliott Kalan

[28:18] That's double indemnity.

[28:19] If he gets distracted by a phone call and is blown up by a truck, you get $3 million.

Dan McCoy

[28:24] The only thing is that God was angry at Julian McMahon for thinking about having an adulterous affair, so he smote him and gave the insurance money to Sandra Bullock.

[28:33] I guess so.

Elliott Kalan

[28:34] What a smoting.

[28:35] Sandra Bullock was collateral damage in this God plan, so God decides to throw her a bone so it's not totally bad for her.

[28:41] What a smoting.

Stuart Wellington

[28:42] And the bone in the form of a new baby to squirt out of her box.

[28:47] You know what?

Dan McCoy

[28:49] You're so sensitive, Stuart.

[28:50] This movie should be taught in Sunday school.

Elliott Kalan

[28:53] Right up there with It's a Wonderful Life and other religious films.

Dan McCoy

[28:56] And all those evangelicals who took Passion of the Christ to your heart.

[29:00] Go out and rent Premonition.

Elliott Kalan

[29:02] And then What Dreams May Come and build your Sunday school syllabus around that.

[29:06] And maybe Constantine.

[29:09] And Dragonslayer.

[29:12] And Fern Gully, The Last Rainforest.

[29:14] And Dragonheart.

[29:15] And The Last Dragon.

[29:18] And Enter the Dragon.

[29:20] And Dragonwick.

[29:21] And there's got to be more movies with dragons.

[29:24] And Pete's Dragon.

[29:25] There you go.

[29:26] That's my Sunday school syllabus right there.

[29:28] Pete's Dragon, Dragonheart, Dragon Slayer, Dragonwick.

[29:31] Enter the Dragon and The Last Dragon.

Dan McCoy

[29:32] Because all those dinosaurs, those dinosaur bones are dragons.

[29:35] That's what you've got to understand.

Elliott Kalan

[29:36] Well, they're dragons that died in the flood, yeah.

[29:38] Except for the bones that were buried by Satan to confuse us.

Dan McCoy

[29:41] Well, fair enough.

[29:43] So, this movie, man, it was really good.

Elliott Kalan

[29:45] It was great.

[29:46] This is a movie that was a lot of nothing for about, what, an hour and 20 minutes?

[29:50] And then the craziest ending in history.

Stuart Wellington

[29:53] Yeah.

[29:53] I thought the ending was a joke for a minute.

[29:55] And then I realized this wasn't a comedy.

[29:58] It felt like the ending of Planet Terror.

Dan McCoy

[30:01] It was really over the top.

[30:03] It felt like a really weird joke on the audience.

[30:06] Like Andy Kaufman directed a movie.

[30:08] He was like, I'm just going to do a really serious melodrama.

Stuart Wellington

[30:11] We watch this annoying movie for an hour and a half.

[30:13] And then it gets crazy.

[30:15] And then an awesome explosion.

Stuart Wellington

[30:15] And then a pregnant lady.

Dan McCoy

[30:17] So, let's get down to final judgments.

[30:19] Because there's no reason to talk about this more.

[30:21] By the way, I just want to point out for everyone listening.

Stuart Wellington

[30:22] Final judgments.

[30:23] This is just for posterity's sake.

[30:25] If I ever die in a car accident, I really want there to be an awesome explosion to punctuate it for me.

[30:30] Okay.

[30:31] If I do die in a car accident, somebody blow up the car.

Dan McCoy

[30:34] Okay.

[30:35] I will follow you around every time you're in a car.

[30:37] I will have a couple of gas cans and just follow you around.

[30:40] So, if you crash, I'll just run up and pour a bunch of gas all over her.

Elliott Kalan

[30:43] Also, for posterity, Dan, if you can make sure when I die that if my head is removed during the death,

[30:49] that they fucking sew that shit back on.

[30:51] Because I do not want the casket to fall on my head to pop off.

Stuart Wellington

[30:55] This is a lot of responsibility.

[30:56] Right?

[30:56] It's not my grieving widow.

[30:57] Dan, you can handle this.

[30:58] You can handle this.

[30:59] Is that because you have a low opinion of the people who are going to be your pallbearers?

[31:02] I saw a premonition.

[31:03] You can't trust anyone in the funeral industry.

Dan McCoy

[31:05] Well, I might die when a helicopter blade cuts off my head.

[31:10] And I don't want that to fall out.

[31:12] Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[31:13] John Landis isn't directing your life.

[31:16] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[31:16] Come on.

[31:17] Wow, I wasn't even thinking about that.

[31:19] All right.

[31:20] You had to bring it down.

[31:21] Seriously, though, make sure they sew that shit on.

Stuart Wellington

[31:23] Seriously, though, don't let John Landis anywhere near me.

Elliott Kalan

[31:25] Don't let...

[31:25] I never want to be anywhere near John Landis.

Stuart Wellington

[31:27] So, I was just planning on using some chewing gum and some tape.

Elliott Kalan

[31:32] Whatever it takes, just stick it on there.

[31:34] Because I'm on...

[31:35] I'm dead.

[31:35] I don't care.

Dan McCoy

[31:36] I'm going to be a mortician, by the way.

[31:36] I know...

[31:36] Did you go to mortuary school?

[31:37] Just put like a stick.

[31:39] Just like ram a stick in her neck and then ram a nose.

[31:41] Whatever it takes.

[31:41] That's what you wanted, I mean...

Elliott Kalan

[31:43] Pretty me up.

[31:43] Just make me look better.

[31:44] Okay, I'll take care of that.

[31:45] If you can like mold a six-pack out of my surprisingly blubbery stomach, then...

Stuart Wellington

[31:50] You can do that with dead bodies nowadays.

Elliott Kalan

[31:52] Yeah.

[31:52] Well, when you die, your body basically turns into putty.

Stuart Wellington

[31:55] Yeah, like clay, right?

[31:56] Yeah, like clay face, exactly.

[31:58] Yeah, like clay face, sure.

[31:59] So, you can become any bad guy or character from the Batman universe.

[32:03] Yeah, or like Darkman.

[32:04] So, though...

[32:04] Oh, the Dark...

Dan McCoy

[32:05] No kidding.

[32:06] Ultimately, though, was this movie a bad movie that you would not recommend at all?

[32:09] A movie that was bad, but was good as a funny bad movie?

[32:13] Or a movie that you liked in some way?

[32:16] Elliot?

Elliott Kalan

[32:17] I would say this was a bad movie that was unenjoyable until the last five minutes or so.

[32:21] But those last five minutes, here's the rub, wouldn't mean as much without the preceding

[32:26] hour and 25 of boring garbage.

[32:28] So, what are you going to do?

[32:29] It's like The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, which I finished watching today.

[32:32] Powerful end scene, but you have to slog through everything that comes before it.

[32:36] Yeah, I agree.

Stuart Wellington

[32:36] It's a lot like Dead Alive by Takeshi Miike, where you're like...

[32:41] Dead or Alive?

[32:42] Dead or Alive.

[32:42] Not Dead Alive, yeah, that'd be another movie.

[32:45] Peter Jackson?

[32:46] Yeah.

[32:46] Where you're like, hey, this is kind of weird crime drama, kind of extreme, I guess, and

[32:51] then the end happens.

[32:52] You're like, oh my god, they blew up the planet?

[32:54] That's awesome.

Dan McCoy

[32:55] Yeah, no, I agree entirely.

[32:57] The last ten minutes of this movie are just zaniness.

Elliott Kalan

[33:00] The constant, like, what more can we throw in his path to keep him from maybe...

[33:04] To maybe make him die in that car and then make him okay and then he dies anyway.

[33:08] But I can't...

Dan McCoy

[33:08] Oops, dropped my phone again!

[33:09] I can't in good conscience recommend this to anyone, though.

[33:12] I think that, like, if you've listened to this podcast, you've gotten all the enjoyment

[33:16] you're going to get out of this film.

Stuart Wellington

[33:17] Learn from us.

[33:18] Yeah.

[33:18] Just to, like, kind of paint a picture for you guys, I generally like movies that are,

[33:23] like, violent in some way, like, have, like, gore or, like, horror elements or feature

[33:29] a lot of, like, nudity.

[33:30] Like a TNA...

[33:31] You're a man of simple...

[33:32] Yeah, like a TNA comedy or something.

[33:33] Yeah.

[33:34] And, uh, yeah, this movie had really nothing that I would be interested in except for the

[33:39] last five minutes.

Elliott Kalan

[33:39] You're looking for gore or TNA.

[33:41] This is not the movie to go to.

[33:42] Yeah.

[33:42] Yeah, terrible.

[33:43] But for the audience, just so they understand exactly what we're talking about, it's like

[33:46] if you went to see Raiders of the Lost Ark and Indiana Jones is falling off of things

[33:50] and guys are punching him in the face and there's explosions and he gets through all of them.

[33:53] And then just at the last minute when he's about to save the day, like, someone stabs

[33:57] him in the neck and he dies.

[33:58] And it's like, wait a minute.

[34:00] Wait, hold on.

[34:01] Like, why did you...

[34:02] Wait, but you...

[34:02] It was implicitly promised that when he went through all of the trials he would survive

[34:06] at the end and win.

[34:07] Like, why would...

[34:08] Okay.

[34:09] And then he's...

[34:09] And then Karen Allen's pregnant.

[34:11] That's pretty good.

Dan McCoy

[34:12] And the child's name would be Mutt.

[34:14] We should go back in time and tell Lawrence Kasdan how to, uh...

Elliott Kalan

[34:18] The only thing that would have been a better ending for the movie is if when she got

[34:21] up pregnant, dissolved, like...

[34:23] Wait, she dissolved?

[34:24] No, no, no.

[34:25] So you could see inside her pregnant belly and the fetus was there and winked at the audience.

[34:29] I thought you were going to be like, the fetus was like Julian McMahon.

Dan McCoy

[34:32] It was like the Star Child in 2001.

Elliott Kalan

[34:33] Well, it's Julian McMahon's head on a fetus's body and he winks at the audience and then the

[34:37] movie blacks out.

[34:39] That'd be pretty awesome.

[34:40] He's back.

Dan McCoy

[34:41] Yep.

[34:42] And then there's a sequel, which is the evil baby Julian McMahon going around killing people.

[34:47] Premonomen.

Stuart Wellington

[34:48] See, I was going to say, I would like it more if she got up and, like, there's a close-up

[34:53] belly and then, like, a hand burst through the belly.

[34:55] Like, and it's alive.

[34:56] Holding, like, a rose or something.

[34:57] Or holding a cell phone.

[34:58] And you're like, oh my god!

[35:00] He's still alive!

Elliott Kalan

[35:01] You did this to me!

[35:03] Holding a cell phone.

[35:05] The baby's like...

[35:06] Holding a cell phone.

[35:07] And then you just hear Julian McMahon's voice saying, it's for you.

Dan McCoy

[35:10] If any of these things happened, I would have immediately recommended this movie at the end

[35:15] of the podcast.

[35:15] It would have been a great movie.

[35:17] As bad as the rest of the film was, like, that alone would be enough to redeem the whole

[35:21] thing.

[35:22] A real, like, shaggy dog story of the movie.

Stuart Wellington

[35:24] So, what was the, uh...

[35:25] What was, like, the catchphrase for this movie?

[35:27] Like, what was unlike...

[35:28] What's the box cover look like?

[35:30] Is it just, like, Sandra Bullock looking, like, kind of confused?

[35:34] Or, like...

[35:34] Is it, like, her and Julian McMahon making out?

Elliott Kalan

[35:37] I'm sure it's, like, her phase, and it's, like, what if nothing was as it seemed?

[35:40] Or something.

Stuart Wellington

[35:40] Yeah, or, like, this premonition is murder.

Elliott Kalan

[35:44] I wish it was, this is one premonition you don't want to premonote.

Dan McCoy

[35:47] Sometimes you premonice.

Elliott Kalan

[35:50] Premonotion.

[35:51] That would be my review of this.

[35:52] Yeah.

[35:53] Okay.

[35:54] Uh, wait.

[35:54] Your daily variety review.

[35:56] My daily...

[35:57] Wait.

Stuart Wellington

[35:57] Did I ever summarize the...

Dan McCoy

[35:59] Picks, nicks, premonics, picks.

Stuart Wellington

[36:01] I didn't, uh...

[36:02] I don't think I actually rated this one.

[36:04] I'm gonna say it's a bad movie that I wouldn't recommend.

[36:07] All right.

Elliott Kalan

[36:08] Fair enough.

[36:08] I mean, I figured that was implied.

[36:09] How do you sell...

[36:10] Like, I remember when this movie was in theaters briefly, but, like, how do you sell this movie?

[36:14] Like, the only hook to the plot is so vague, and nothing of interest visually or dramatically

[36:19] ever happens, like...

Stuart Wellington

[36:20] What do you think about the script got, you know, a heavyweight, like, Sandra Bullock involved?

[36:25] Is it...

[36:25] Is she just really into, like, time travel bullshit?

[36:28] Like, Lake House?

[36:28] She must be.

Elliott Kalan

[36:28] Lake House came out.

[36:29] Premonition came out.

[36:30] Time Cap?

Stuart Wellington

[36:31] Uh, time...

[36:32] She was in Time Cop?

[36:34] Uh, she was in Demolition.

Dan McCoy

[36:35] No, you're just saying that...

[36:36] Oh, I'm sorry.

Elliott Kalan

[36:37] I got my time-traveling action stars mixed up.

Dan McCoy

[36:39] She's just saying that Time Cop came out.

[36:41] It's another movie that came out.

Elliott Kalan

[36:42] Yeah, the movie...

[36:43] Time Cop, Time and Again, From Time to Time, The Time Machine, both versions.

[36:49] Sure.

[36:49] Timex Watches.

[36:51] Back to the Future, one through three.

Stuart Wellington

[36:53] The Cartoon Series.

[36:56] Karate Kid.

Elliott Kalan

[36:57] Karate Kid Ate Karate Through Time.

Stuart Wellington

[36:59] Oh, my God.

[36:59] That's the one where he goes back in time to Feudal Japan.

[37:01] Of all the episodes.

[37:03] TMNT 3.

Dan McCoy

[37:03] This is the one where we spent most time...

[37:05] Turtles in Space.

[37:06] Just listing?

[37:06] Just listing movies.

Elliott Kalan

[37:08] Sure.

[37:08] Turtles in Space.

[37:09] That would have been awesome.

Dan McCoy

[37:10] Now, you gotta imagine that if they kept making Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movies,

[37:14] there would be Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in Space, and there would be Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

[37:19] in the hood.

[37:19] That would have been another one.

[37:20] TMNT in Vegas.

Stuart Wellington

[37:21] Aren't they pretty much already in the hood?

[37:23] Or I guess sewers aren't the hood.

[37:24] Wow.

[37:25] That's...

[37:26] Yeah.

[37:26] You know, the hood is still above ground.

[37:28] Come on, man.

[37:29] It depends on the hood, you know?

Elliott Kalan

[37:31] Not too many of them are underground.

[37:33] Maybe a mole person's hood.

Stuart Wellington

[37:34] Well, I mean, yeah.

[37:35] Like, the Chuds hood is in the sewers.

Elliott Kalan

[37:38] I don't even call it a hood.

[37:39] There's no businesses.

[37:40] There's no real apartments.

[37:41] It's still a neighborhood, though.

Stuart Wellington

[37:42] Like, they lived there with somebody.

[37:44] Why don't they interact more with the Chuds?

Dan McCoy

[37:46] Like, I figure, if they're the only two groups down there, the Mutant Ninja Turtles and

[37:50] the Chuds, they would, like...

[37:51] They're probably, like, neighbors who don't get along very well.

[37:54] Yeah.

[37:54] Yeah, that's sad.

Stuart Wellington

[37:55] Well, yeah, because they have different, like, they have different M.O.s.

[37:58] The Chuds, they eat human beings.

[38:00] Yeah.

[38:00] Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

[38:02] Eat pizza.

[38:02] Yeah, they eat pizza.

[38:04] Possibly the Chuds might eat the pizza delivery boys.

Elliott Kalan

[38:06] But also, like, the Chuds are not...

[38:08] are kind of avoid the spotlight, and the Turtles are friends with a very famous reporter.

[38:12] I'll tell you one thing.

[38:12] You gotta know she'd take that story.

Dan McCoy

[38:14] And a hockey player, right?

[38:15] A movie I liked to surprise him out.

[38:16] He's not really a hockey player.

[38:17] A movie I liked to surprise him out.

[38:18] Chud 2, Bud the Chud.

[38:21] Okay.

[38:22] It ends up with a zombie prom.

Stuart Wellington

[38:25] Promsy?

[38:26] You want to be Buds with the Chuds.

Dan McCoy

[38:28] Bud the Chud was actually going to be a...

[38:31] It was a rejected Return of the Living Dead sequel script.

[38:34] Oh, that's right.

[38:35] And went another direction.

[38:36] They're like, well, we can't waste this great script.

[38:38] We'll just make it a Chud movie.

Elliott Kalan

[38:40] That's like the He-Man Masters of the Universe movie.

[38:42] That script started as a movie adaptation, a spec movie adaptation of Jack Kirby's Fourth

[38:47] World New Gods storylines.

[38:49] And it's like, well, we can get the Masters of the Universe license, so we'll turn Darkseid

[38:52] into Skeletor.

[38:53] That is really strange.

[38:54] And Orion will be He-Man.

[38:55] That's why Masters of the Universe...

Dan McCoy

[38:56] Was there so much objective to this philosophy in there?

[38:59] Is that what...

Elliott Kalan

[39:00] No, that's Steve Ditko you're talking about.

[39:01] Oh, okay.

Dan McCoy

[39:02] Sorry.

[39:03] What are we thinking of Ditko?

Elliott Kalan

[39:05] Mr. A, the question?

[39:07] Spider-Man?

[39:07] Oh, never mind.

[39:08] I mean, he didn't have any big science fiction universes, as far as I know.

[39:13] All right.

[39:14] But anyway...

[39:14] Dan's lame.

[39:16] We're going to edit out Dan being...

[39:17] Or maybe Elliot's lame.

Dan McCoy

[39:18] Yeah, that's the real question.

Elliott Kalan

[39:20] If it's lame to know the different...

[39:21] To know that the Masters of the Universe script was originally a New Gods script, then call

[39:26] me lame.

[39:27] I'll take that charge.

[39:29] Guilty as judge.

[39:31] So, weird.

[39:31] We're talking so similar now.

[39:33] Oh, my God.

Dan McCoy

[39:33] This has become such a niche podcast, I think we should move on to that.

[39:37] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[39:37] As I've said before, this bad movie podcast, where we watch bad movies and then discuss them,

[39:42] is really becoming a niche podcast.

[39:45] Look, I...

[39:46] We're alienating.

[39:47] We're alienating.

Dan McCoy

[39:48] I'm trying to extend the brand.

[39:50] I'm going to get Courtney Cox on as a guest host.

Elliott Kalan

[39:53] Are there...

[39:53] What mainstream podcasts are there?

[39:55] Are there any that are not niche podcasts?

Dan McCoy

[39:57] Oh, God.

[39:59] Dan Cook.

[39:59] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[40:00] It's still like a niche, though.

[40:01] Well, like podcasts that are just podcasts.

[40:03] I guess This American Life, yeah.

[40:04] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[40:05] But those are like radio things.

[40:06] Like things that are just podcasts.

[40:07] Yeah.

[40:07] What is there that's not a niche?

[40:09] Never Not Funny, I guess, is a big podcast.

[40:11] I don't know what that is.

[40:13] Sound of Young America is on...

[40:15] It's a radio.

[40:16] ...radio, but it was mainly came as podcasts.

[40:17] I don't want to talk about podcasts.

Stuart Wellington

[40:19] I want to talk about movies, guys.

[40:21] All right.

[40:21] So, that was a crappy movie.

[40:23] Let's talk about movies that we've seen recently that weren't quite as crappy.

[40:26] Sure.

[40:26] Because I've seen a lot of crappy ones lately.

Dan McCoy

[40:28] Oh, wait.

[40:29] Do I get started?

[40:30] No.

[40:30] You can designate a person to go first if you don't have one.

[40:33] Dan, go for...

[40:34] Oh, I have plenty, but I want you to go first.

[40:36] I just watched a movie...

[40:38] Two, I will only briefly talk about the second one, though.

[40:40] The first one is This is England, and I...

[40:42] Yeah, it's not bad.

[40:43] I've been...

[40:43] Oh, I remember when that came out.

[40:45] I've been recommending a lot of movies recently that...

[40:48] Suck.

[40:48] Not suck, but because I like to recommend movies that are a little obscure, sometimes I may

[40:53] talk up movies a little more than they deserve just because I want to say, like, oh, this

[40:57] is overlooked.

[40:58] Yeah, you church it up.

[41:00] Church it up.

[41:01] Exactly.

[41:02] It's my permission.

[41:02] Church is where they really oversell things.

[41:05] But This is England.

[41:06] I think it's a genuinely really good movie.

[41:08] It's about a kid.

[41:09] It's set in 1983 in England during the time of the Falklands War.

[41:14] His father actually just died in the Falklands War, and he falls in with a group of skinheads,

[41:20] and at first, like, these are like skinheads who are into it, like, culturally, and it's

[41:24] sort of a class-based, like I said, cultural thing.

[41:27] But then one of the members comes back from being in jail and sort of gets into the racist

[41:33] skinhead politics.

[41:34] And it shows how this kid sort of falls into it and then falls out of it.

[41:38] But it's a, you know, it's a really good sort of time capsule of the time and place.

[41:42] It has a really good sense of place, really good music.

[41:44] It's a good sort of slice of life.

[41:46] I liked it a little better at the beginning when it was more of a slice of life and less,

[41:50] like, plot mechanics.

[41:51] But it's a really strong movie.

[41:52] And briefly, I want to recommend the film Abominable, which is a movie that has Lance Henriksen,

[42:00] who we mentioned before, in a small role, and Jeffrey Combs in a small role.

[42:05] Paul Gleeson, I think his name?

[42:08] Jackie Gleeson.

[42:09] Who, the guy who was the principal in The Breakfast Club has a small role?

Stuart Wellington

[42:13] Sure.

[42:14] Isn't the guy from, isn't the guy from, who's like Mahoney's replacement on Police Academy

[42:20] in that movie, isn't he the guy with the big ears?

Dan McCoy

[42:22] Could be, I'm not sure.

[42:24] But it's basically a movie like, someone saw...

Stuart Wellington

[42:26] Tiffany Shepes' ass is in that movie.

[42:28] Yeah.

[42:29] Which is amazing, by the way, Tiffany Shepes.

[42:31] Stuart and I are a big fan.

Elliott Kalan

[42:32] How were you describing it before?

Stuart Wellington

[42:34] It's like a pumpkin that I want to bite.

[42:35] A juicy pumpkin.

Elliott Kalan

[42:36] Stuart says, it's like a pumpkin, you just want to bite it.

[42:39] Yeah, like a normal...

[42:40] I've never seen a pumpkin and wanted to take a bite out of it.

Stuart Wellington

[42:43] Dude, you should take another look at her ass, dude.

[42:46] Yeah, but that's not the metaphor that you...

[42:48] Don't worry about it, guys.

[42:50] Okay.

[42:51] I got this one.

[42:52] But it's just a really good like...

Elliott Kalan

[42:54] As if you're holding something up to make sure it doesn't fall,

[42:56] and we're running away.

[42:57] I got this one, dude.

Dan McCoy

[42:59] It's a good creature feature, like sort of...

[43:01] Just a monster movie that's taken seriously.

[43:03] It's as if someone watched Rear Window and was like,

[43:07] Hmm, Rear Window's pretty good.

[43:09] But what if the killer, instead of being Raymond Burr,

[43:12] was Bigfoot?

[43:14] So, if that sounds interesting to you,

[43:16] you should see the movie Abominable.

[43:19] It's not Abominable.

[43:20] Thanks, Gene Shallot.

[43:23] Hey, that's my Gene Shallot.

Elliott Kalan

[43:25] Where's your room of teddy bears that you do your reviews from?

Stuart Wellington

[43:29] We're in it right now, Elliot.

Elliott Kalan

[43:31] That's really creepy.

[43:32] You press a button and a wall swings around and it's just teddy bears?

[43:36] Yep.

[43:37] Teddy grams.

[43:38] It's all teddy grams.

Stuart Wellington

[43:39] If I push a different button,

[43:40] a hall of mirrors erupts around us.

[43:43] This is an expensive room.

[43:44] Yeah.

[43:44] In New York, no less.

[43:46] Where should you pay for this apartment?

[43:48] So, Elliot, we just heard from Daniel.

[43:49] Let's hear from you.

[43:50] Have you seen any good movies lately?

Elliott Kalan

[43:52] Sure.

[43:52] I saw...

Stuart Wellington

[43:54] I'll recommend two movies, too.

[43:55] Let's keep it brief.

[43:56] Okay.

[43:57] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[43:58] Wow.

[43:59] Timekeeper Wellington over there.

[44:01] There are two movies I saw.

[44:02] One in the theaters, one not.

[44:03] The one in the theaters is a recent Norwegian movie called Reprise

[44:06] that I enjoyed about two young writers in Norway

[44:10] who have this dream about what it means to be a tortured writer

[44:13] and they're going to live these very cliched,

[44:16] like, I'm a writer and then I have mental issues

[44:18] and then I come back from it, write something even better,

[44:20] and then I fall in love and then it's tragic.

[44:22] These kind of fantasies,

[44:23] but they find out after their first works get published

[44:25] that living that life is not really that enjoyable.

[44:29] It's actually more difficult than it looks.

[44:30] And it was apparently Norway's entry to the 2006

[44:33] Best Foreign Film Academy Awards

[44:35] and it's playing at the Brooklyn Academy of Music right now.

[44:37] The other movie that I saw recently,

[44:39] which both of the other people at this podcast have seen

[44:41] and maybe many in the audience have seen,

[44:43] was Ginger Snaps 2 Unleashed,

[44:45] which is the sequel to the hit Canadian horror film Ginger Snaps

[44:50] about teen werewolves starring Mimi Rogers

[44:52] as the mother of the stars of the movie.

[44:55] You mentioned her because she's the only name that you would recognize.

[45:00] Star of Full Body Massage, Mimi Rogers.

[45:02] The first Ginger Snaps is really good,

[45:03] but it kind of loses its way after a certain point.

[45:05] Ginger Snaps 2 I actually enjoyed overall a little bit more maybe.

[45:08] It's a stranger movie.

[45:09] The first one is about a girl in high school becoming a werewolf.

[45:12] And the second one takes it in this direction of this kind of like

[45:15] girls' juvie hall slash mental facility.

[45:18] And there's a werewolf chasing after the only character

[45:21] who survived from the first movie.

[45:23] And it just goes in this very interesting direction

[45:26] and it ends with a completely different status quo than it started with.

[45:29] There are a lot of good thriller scenes and some funny lines in it.

[45:32] And it's Canadian through and through,

[45:34] which adds to the fun.

Dan McCoy

[45:35] Hot Canadian werewolf girls.

Elliott Kalan

[45:37] I recommend, so I recommend, if you haven't seen the first Ginger Snaps,

[45:40] you should see both of them together.

[45:42] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[45:42] Maybe it's a double feature.

[45:44] A double creature feature.

[45:45] Yeah, that works.

[45:47] Stuart, you're the only person who hasn't said anything yet in this segment of the podcast.

[45:50] Sure.

Stuart Wellington

[45:50] Well, I totally recommend Ginger Snaps as well,

[45:53] if only because I'm totally in love with Catherine Isabel.

[45:56] She is pretty hot.

[45:57] The titular character, Ginger.

Elliott Kalan

[46:00] It's about cops, Ginger and Snaps.

[46:03] Yeah, they're buddies.

[46:04] I'm Ginger.

[46:04] He's Snaps.

[46:05] Watch out for all them werewolves out there.

[46:08] Let's be careful about bears.

[46:09] What was that movie where it was a unit,

[46:11] it was called like Full Moon or something,

[46:13] where it was a unit,

[46:14] it was a special unit of the NYPD that was secretly werewolves.

[46:17] I want to say that like Mario Van Peebles or somebody like that was in it.

Stuart Wellington

[46:21] Yeah, he's in good movies, like Posse.

Dan McCoy

[46:24] All I can think of is that Joe Piscopo movie where there are zombies.

[46:27] That's Dead Heat.

[46:28] Yeah.

[46:29] And that movie's awesome.

Stuart Wellington

[46:30] That's a movie where everybody has an Uzi.

[46:34] Just like life.

[46:35] Literally every character has an Uzi.

[46:36] Just like life.

[46:37] So I watched some movies lately.

[46:38] Last night I watched Just One of the Guys again, which is awesome.

[46:42] It has a really great boob shot.

Elliott Kalan

[46:44] I think our listeners, if they know Just One of the Guys,

[46:47] then they know it has.

[46:48] And if they know you, they know why you enjoy Just One of the Guys.

Stuart Wellington

[46:51] I just want to remind everybody that it's got a great boob shot.

[46:53] And a couple nights ago I watched this really great movie called Twin Sitters,

[46:58] starring the Barbarian Brothers.

[46:59] We did a whole movie minute on this.

[47:01] So I'm not going to go over that too much.

[47:03] It was so good.

[47:04] So earlier today I watched a movie called Outpost,

[47:07] starring Ray Stevenson, the Titus Bowie character.

[47:10] Oh, The Flash.

[47:11] Oh, that's Ray Stevens.

[47:12] Yeah.

[47:12] Never mind.

[47:13] Oh, The Streak, rather.

[47:14] He played the Titus Palo character from the HBO series Rome.

[47:20] And it's basically about a group of mercenaries

[47:22] who are hired to go into Eastern Europe,

[47:25] to go to this strange bunker,

[47:28] which turns out to be an old Nazi bunker

[47:31] where they were doing some kind of strange experiments,

[47:33] and there's a bunch of unstoppable Nazi zombies that they have to battle.

[47:37] What's it called?

[47:37] Are they bloodsucking Nazi zombies?

[47:39] Outpost.

[47:40] They're not bloodsucking.

[47:42] It's really bleak, and that's kind of what I like about it.

[47:45] It's really grim.

Elliott Kalan

[47:47] All right.

[47:47] Oh, and also I want to say I re-watched Ed Wood recently

[47:50] with my girlfriend who had not seen it.

[47:52] Did it get you laid?

[47:54] I mean, I don't really need Ed Wood to get me.

[47:57] I mean, I'm in love with him.

[47:58] Oh, oh, Elliot doesn't need Ed Wood to get him laid.

[48:01] Well, he's better than the rest of us, I guess.

Dan McCoy

[48:05] Just because I need to hand out copies of Ed Wood every time I want to get laid.

Elliott Kalan

[48:10] I just got this window into Dan's home life where he is wooing his wife with Ed Wood.

[48:15] We can watch Ed Wood again tonight.

Dan McCoy

[48:17] No, I pay her in copies of Ed Wood.

[48:19] You don't understand.

[48:20] Consider this.

[48:21] And then she sells the copies.

[48:22] It's a weird system.

[48:24] It's a very strange system.

[48:24] A bombarder slash, you know, payment.

Elliott Kalan

[48:27] But considering this is a bad movie web podcast,

[48:29] I thought it would be fitting to remind people that it's a good movie

[48:33] and girlfriends like it too.

Stuart Wellington

[48:34] Well, everyone has, unlike Tango and Cash.

Dan McCoy

[48:37] Everyone's recommended like eight movies,

[48:39] so I'm going to cut this segment short.

[48:40] Sure.

[48:41] But we like movies, Dan.

[48:43] Yeah, come on.

Elliott Kalan

[48:43] Sure.

[48:44] It's a niche podcast.

[48:45] Sure.

Dan McCoy

[48:45] Well, I'm just going to say,

[48:47] please, if you have anything that you want us to address,

[48:50] send your concerns or questions to theflophousepodcast at gmail.com

[48:56] and you can check out the website at theflophousepodcast.blogspot.com.

Elliott Kalan

[49:02] Say it like you're excited about it.

[49:05] Halfway through.

Dan McCoy

[49:05] I just lost any interest.

[49:07] It's a very long idea.

[49:09] Yeah, that's...

Elliott Kalan

[49:10] Are we going to have that contest you were talking about, Dan?

Dan McCoy

[49:12] Yeah, which contest was that?

Elliott Kalan

[49:13] The watch a movie with the Flophouse contest?

Dan McCoy

[49:15] I think that's a great contest.

[49:16] Well, what...

[49:17] Okay.

[49:18] We just know what the prize is.

[49:20] We don't know what the actual contest is.

Elliott Kalan

[49:21] Flophouse listeners, prove you love the Flophouse

[49:24] by doing something great for us

[49:25] and getting other people to listen to the Flophouse.

[49:28] And whoever proves they love the Flophouse the most

[49:30] will get to watch a movie with us, the Flophouse guys,

[49:33] and maybe take part in a podcast.

[49:35] Sure, that sounds good.

Stuart Wellington

[49:36] And that proof will have to either be in written format via email

[49:41] or picture format, which is preferred.

[49:43] Yes.

[49:44] That'll either be a drawing of some kind,

[49:46] because we like drawings here,

[49:48] or, you know, pictures.

[49:49] Yeah.

[49:49] I have to say, though, this contest...

Dan McCoy

[49:51] Boobs are prepared.

[49:52] I have to say, this contest is probably only open

[49:55] to people who live in the greater New York City area.

Elliott Kalan

[49:58] No, if they want to fly in,

[50:00] all expenses are paid by them.

[50:01] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[50:02] No, exactly.

[50:03] If you want to get here somehow,

[50:05] you are responsible for all lodging and transportation costs.

[50:09] The only prize is literally...

[50:11] Okay.

[50:12] ...watching a movie with us.

Elliott Kalan

[50:13] There is no monetary value to this,

[50:16] and you must pay...

[50:17] Winner pays expenses.

Stuart Wellington

[50:18] Yeah.

[50:20] Except for beer and snacks, which we will cover.

[50:22] Which will be provided.

[50:23] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[50:25] That's like a $4 value.

[50:27] If you want to eat...

Elliott Kalan

[50:28] Right there.

[50:28] ...pop-ice fried chicken while we watch the movie,

[50:31] Dan lives right near one,

[50:32] and I go to it every time I come here,

[50:33] and I'll gladly pick up...

[50:33] We're not doing this in my apartment.

[50:34] I'll gladly pick up...

Dan McCoy

[50:35] I'm not having Riff Raff.

[50:36] We agreed.

[50:37] We're doing it at the Stewart's Place.

[50:38] I approve of Riff Raff in my apartment.

[50:40] Okay.

[50:40] That's totally okay.

Stuart Wellington

[50:41] Riff Raff in the Junkyard Gang?

[50:43] Yeah.

[50:44] Wait, wasn't that like the weird Garfield spinoff character?

[50:47] It was the Heathcliff spinoff.

[50:48] Heathcliff.

[50:49] Well, Stewart and Elliot...

[50:50] U.S. Acres.

[50:51] ...argue this issue.

Dan McCoy

[50:53] I would like to sign off saying,

[50:55] I'm Dan McCoy.

[50:56] I'm Stewart Wellington.

[50:58] I'm Elliot Kalin.

[50:59] Good night, everyone.

Stuart Wellington

[51:01] Yay.

[51:01] So, yeah, Riff Raff, he wore the Kangol...

[51:04] Riff Raff had a...

Elliott Kalan

[51:04] No, it was just a backwards hat, I think.

[51:06] He had a scarf and a staff, yeah.

[51:07] And he had the friend with the roller skates and the headphones.

[51:09] And he had the hot cat girlfriend.

Stuart Wellington

[51:10] Hot girlfriend.

Elliott Kalan

[51:11] And they lived in a junkyard.

[51:17] Are you ready for that shit?

Stuart Wellington

[51:20] Daniel, I'm going to talk like this the entire podcast.

Dan McCoy

[51:24] And I'm going to talk like this.

Stuart Wellington

[51:26] That'll be awesome.

[51:28] Premonition.

[51:29] Are you experiencing one right now?

[51:32] Are you guys ready for an adventure?

[51:35] Okay.

[51:35] That's my Lily Sobieski impression.

[51:37] Thank you very much.

[51:39] Lily Sobieski from the movie Joy.

[51:42] Are you guys ready for an invention?

[51:44] All right.

[51:48] Um...

[51:48] I'm going to talk like this.

Stuart Wellington

The Flop House: Episode 20 - Premonition

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