FH Mini 9 - Return to New Moon

[0:00] hey guys what are we talking about was that the big do we know uh well we got we brought uh we

[0:13] brought an expert in to talk about the movie twilight the twilight saga colon noon the

[0:18] flophouse's wacky neighbor chris whites is back with his crazy movie now wait i just want to i

[0:25] just want to double check so we've officially started the episode despite not announcing the

[0:29] show or who we are or any of that stuff hey everyone this is the flop house uh it's a podcast

[0:35] about bad movies normally but on off weeks we do uh many episodes that are a lot looser

[0:41] and sometimes we start without elliot knowing and i'm dan mccoy hey i'm stewart wellington i'm

[0:47] elliot calen loving yeah this new wtf with mark maron style of starting and just kind of rolling

[0:51] on into it and joining us joining us is star of the show hallie hagland

[0:57] uh so how many how many times has hallie been on the show when when does one reach the hagland

[1:04] line oh boy you gotta you're gonna need a lot more when do you get a when do you get a hallie jacket

[1:08] i mean it's got to be over 10 really but is it under 20 do you think yes yes okay uh so in there

[1:19] So it's not Hallie Hagelin.

[1:20] It's our wacky neighbor, Chris Weitz, joining us again.

[1:23] Yeah.

[1:24] Have I mentioned on the show that, you know, now that I've heard all of the episodes, I fall asleep to your guys' voices every night.

[1:34] And have I creeped you out with that ever before?

[1:37] And somehow no other podcast will do anymore for a while.

[1:40] I listen to that strange Australian paranormal podcast, Strange Universe.

[1:47] It has to be the Flophouse.

[1:49] I have a soothing voice.

[1:50] Everyone said it.

[1:52] Yep.

[1:52] It's like the sound of silk being dragged through butter

[1:57] is the way that my voice has been described.

[1:58] My brother described it as exactly like the voice actor

[2:04] who portrayed Howard the Duck in 1984's Howard the Duck.

[2:08] That quote is on my headshot, by the way, now.

[2:10] Or is it?

[2:11] It's 86, right?

[2:12] 86, yeah.

[2:13] That was when we...

[2:14] Oh, sorry.

[2:15] Because I was like, Elliot was like four years old

[2:17] when that movie came out uh i didn't see it my brother is undeterred oh yeah that because i oh

[2:23] no no my future self went back and recorded it at the same time that i was being my own father

[2:29] and mother i also recorded the voice track for howard the duck i mean i i also listen to podcasts

[2:36] uh to go to sleep i find the i i find the voices of humans comforting no more than uh now as the

[2:44] world is falling apart i like to know that people somewhere are talking about something

[2:48] that i can kind of pay attention to and kind of then just zone out and drift off and i'm pretty

[2:53] sure i've seen dan tell those podcasters that you do that so chris you shouldn't feel weird at all

[3:00] that's i i feel like dan's done that i mean in my presence if i could find the sound engineer who

[3:06] put together 100 spooky halloween sound effects and tell him how much help it's or her how much

[3:11] help it's given me falling asleep, those chain rattles,

[3:13] creaky doors, witch cackles.

[3:15] I would. Well, it has the opposite effect.

[3:17] Instead of scaring you silly and keeping

[3:19] you up. Oh, no. It just lulls

[3:21] me to sleep. Because I love, there's nothing more comforting

[3:23] to me than knowing that I'm watched over by an

[3:25] evil ghost, a witch,

[3:26] perhaps a murderer of some kind. You know, that I'm

[3:29] not alone. You know, that's crazy.

[3:31] Elliot's a Beetlejuice.

[3:31] As far as I'm concerned, there's nothing

[3:35] more scary than a

[3:37] creaky door or a bubbling cauldron.

[3:39] Because if I hear those, I'm like, I've got to get up and oil that door and turn off that cauldron.

[3:44] Yeah, yeah.

[3:44] No, I like it.

[3:45] It just makes me feel like I'm in a place that's well-lived and well-loved.

[3:48] Stuart, you referred to me as a Beetlejuice.

[3:50] I'm actually a Beetlejuice, which is a Jewish person who, if you say their name three times, they show up.

[3:57] Okay.

[3:57] I'm not sure you should refer to Jews as beetles.

[4:00] Oh, yeah.

[4:01] But two of the beetles were Jewish.

[4:04] John Lenowitz and...

[4:07] Ringelstein Starr.

[4:09] Engelstein star.

[4:10] Yeah.

[4:15] Sorry, I said something as if I had an idea of where we're going,

[4:19] but I think Elliot probably actually does,

[4:21] and he was also making a noise.

[4:22] I was wondering, so Stuart said,

[4:27] hey, for this episode,

[4:28] why don't we get our good friend and wacky neighbor Chris,

[4:31] who falls asleep to our voices every night,

[4:33] much like Kramer probably does on Seinfeld,

[4:35] listening to Jerry,

[4:37] I assume having sex with his parade of anonymous girlfriends who will never be seen again on the show.

[4:42] They cannot live up to his standard, his exacting standard.

[4:47] And Stuart was like, let's talk to Chris about these Twilight movies and, like, what it's like to make a Twilight movie.

[4:54] Oh, is that the plan?

[4:56] Great, I'm in.

[4:57] Let's do it.

[4:58] Okay, I mean, like, I was like, is Chris actually going to want to, like, talk about his, like, Hollywood experiences?

[5:06] Or is that verboten?

[5:07] I mean, we could ask about producing Columbus.

[5:10] I'd be equally as interested to hear about that.

[5:12] I'm all about that.

[5:13] I know the fans want to hear about it.

[5:15] The Columbites?

[5:19] No, not Columbines.

[5:20] Ooh, no.

[5:21] Not a good name for them.

[5:23] Listen, I don't have anything but Hollywood experiences.

[5:26] My life is Hollywood all the time.

[5:29] Hollywood whites, they call them.

[5:32] Holly whites.

[5:35] It's nothing but lunch at the Ivy and other things that people do in Hollywood, I think.

[5:43] My idea, even living in Los Angeles for a couple years now,

[5:46] my idea of Hollywood is still a guy in a convertible car wearing suspenders and a suit,

[5:51] and he's got a ponytail and a big, like, Zack Morris block cell phone in his hand and little sunglasses,

[5:57] and he's yacking about deals and who's ankling who and how are you going to package this?

[6:04] You're literally just describing what you're seeing on Chris's camera right now.

[6:08] Yeah, I'm actually doing this as I drive down Sunset Boulevard.

[6:13] I don't care.

[6:14] Chris is talking about a snorting cocaine.

[6:16] I'm talking about boffo B.O.

[6:19] Oh, yeah.

[6:20] Whether this picture has legs.

[6:24] And later tonight, when you fall asleep to the sound of our voices,

[6:28] your bed is going to transform into a giant Hollywood Walk of Fame star,

[6:33] and you're going to fly over the giant Hollywood sign.

[6:35] Oh, wow, that's going to be great.

[6:37] Well, I was about to say that my vision of Hollywood as well

[6:40] was informed by movies for so long,

[6:43] and so I was just like, oh, Hollywood is just the Chinese theater

[6:46] and the Walk of Fame.

[6:48] And then the first time I went out to L.A.,

[6:50] I was just astounded to see what a tiny place that is.

[6:54] Outside that theater, the big stars hang out.

[6:56] Batman, Elmo, all of them.

[6:58] SpongeBob.

[6:59] They're all there.

[7:02] John Travolta and the fan.

[7:03] Yeah, the famous character of English Bobby.

[7:06] Yeah, so what's your Hollywood experience like?

[7:11] My E! True Hollywood story?

[7:13] Because fame ain't in a bitch.

[7:16] I'm quoting A.J. Benza.

[7:18] I find that with more money, more problems.

[7:23] Oh, wow.

[7:24] I've never heard that before, but it makes sense.

[7:26] Yeah, I just thought of it.

[7:29] Well, as you guys may know, I don't actually, I mean, well, first of all, there's only one movie studio left in Hollywood, which is Paramount, which is the old, you know, one that was always there.

[7:42] So Hollywood actually isn't very Hollywood, and it's kind of ragging and beating up.

[7:47] I don't know.

[7:48] I mean, my experience was coming out with my brother in 1990, I think,

[7:54] and writing on a lot of movies that never, ever got made.

[8:00] And then our first credit was a production polish on a very Brady sequel.

[8:06] That's a movie that I watched just a few years back.

[8:11] I watched both of the Brady movies.

[8:16] because dan had seen every movie ever made and went to and decided to start back around again

[8:22] so let's circle back and watch those movies for a second time

[8:25] no our tale begins with a giant platter full of pot brownies

[8:30] i wish i uh no it was just like it was during that period when i was living alone

[8:38] and at my saddest and i was just like oh these movies are on hulu or whatever service

[8:45] that perhaps that will be exactly the flavor of undemanding fun that i am looking for at this

[8:52] moment and you know what they were they're funny i feel like that's a hole in the streaming service

[8:56] options there isn't one that is dedicated exclusively to sad men uh i don't know there's

[9:02] a number of online streaming sites that are devoted exclusively to what sad men want to see

[9:07] like sad lonely men i don't i don't think so no it seems like there's a short films very short

[9:13] films yeah most of them shot on tape on video not or dv not on not an actual film kind of dogma 95

[9:19] type yeah yeah a lot of uh nat sound very nat sound all in the same uh prefabricated uh mansion

[9:30] too it's weird i guess that's the studio but what if i was a sad guy that also had a fantasy that i

[9:36] some kind of i don't know pizza delivery fellow would there be an option for me like you got a

[9:44] fellowship to be in pizza yeah yeah he's a he's a he's a domino scholar uh so what was wait so can

[9:52] you explain for the audience chris uh you said a production rewrite what is that production rewrite

[9:57] is when they're they're just about to make a movie and they realize in a cold sweat that it's not

[10:03] That the script is just not going to cut it, which, as you can imagine, given the movies that are made, how bad things must be at that point where they actually decide to rewrite it.

[10:13] So, yeah, my brother and I were brought in.

[10:18] And how did you meet your brother?

[10:20] Well, that's actually amazingly someone asks us that once in a meeting in all seriousness.

[10:31] He also said during that meeting that a script which was about a boy who was raised by whales and ended up winning the Olympics was based on a true story, as he tried to pitch.

[10:46] Now, did he believe that, or he thought you were dumb enough to believe it?

[10:50] Well, I prefer to think the former, and based upon his other remarks, I think I'm right.

[10:58] now that movie got made speaking of about a boy that turned into the screenplay for

[11:02] about a boy that did it started it's one of these crazy stories where like a movie gets

[11:06] rewritten completely unrecognizably the original title was about a whale it was called about a

[11:12] whale boy yeah and then and then they have been having so much trouble with it and then you and

[11:17] your brother stepped in you said here's our pitch and you just crossed out the word whale and they

[11:21] went we're listening let's go back to basics guys yeah people don't want to see movies about whales

[11:30] they want to see movies about boys what about free willy had a boy in it that's what that's

[11:36] what chris does he comes in as like a screenwriter and he does the equivalent of that thing where you

[11:41] look in the mirror and take one thing off you know he's like let's remove the whale from this

[11:46] it's just too much you know it's too much uh unnecessary it was originally twilight new moon

[11:51] and then another moon and you said no no no no just the one moon um so yeah what i remember from

[12:00] that that first uh gig that my brother and i ever had was that at one point we because we were doing

[12:05] all the writing and the production offices of the movie and um at one point we were told that

[12:09] we couldn't order any more sushi on the movie's budget because we're eating too much

[12:14] so we were living it up if you can imagine getting as much um as much takeout sushi as you can eat

[12:22] that's got to be a lot of sushi yeah it was it was my brother and i always uh would eat would

[12:28] order i would not necessarily eat but order too much sushi i remember in new york there used to

[12:32] be these all-you-can-eat sushi places and in order to keep you from um from ordering too much sushi

[12:37] and and wasting it um they would say you have to pay for any sushi that is left over on your plate

[12:43] So what my brother and I would do is occasionally when we would order too much because we were very gluttonous, we would secret it about our persons and then walk to the bathroom and flush it down the toilet.

[12:54] So we would slip it down our shirt cuffs and into our crotches and then have to go and dispose of it.

[13:03] Would you ever pretend that you were freeing the fish that had been imprisoned?

[13:07] Back to the water with you.

[13:09] Swim free.

[13:11] Well, I feel like while in the bathroom on our own, yes.

[13:14] But we wouldn't do that in front of the sushi chef because that would lead to our immediate expulsion.

[13:18] Well, it seems like a weird restaurant where the toilet would be right in front of the sushi chef.

[13:23] How did they get a sanitary grade?

[13:25] That's what I wonder.

[13:26] They were grandfathered in.

[13:28] We should also clarify that Chris's brother, of course, is Jeremy Piven.

[13:34] And that's how he got the mercury poisoning that's so benevolent.

[13:38] Kept him off the Broadway stage, yeah.

[13:41] Is that true? My God.

[13:42] Well, he said he had mercury poisoning.

[13:45] He claimed he had mercury poisoning.

[13:46] Is that like a Michael Douglas' cancer thing?

[13:49] Where he claimed he got it from, you know...

[13:54] I don't think Michael Douglas claimed that.

[13:56] I'm not!

[13:56] I do know, Stuart, and I thought for a second,

[14:00] should I pimp you into having to actually say it,

[14:03] but I don't want you to.

[14:04] Yeah.

[14:06] So what happened after...

[14:10] So a very, very sequel came out.

[14:11] What happened after that?

[14:13] It was a massive hit, and everything is history after that.

[14:16] Let me, what happened after that?

[14:18] Okay, so then I remember,

[14:20] Ants was kind of our next accredited work.

[14:26] My brother and I were, this is actually kind of Hollywood-ish,

[14:30] we were eating breakfast at Hugo's on Santa Monica,

[14:35] which is a kind of a very, like, bit of an institution.

[14:38] And a guy I know was there, and he said that they wanted a writer to rewrite a movie about ants.

[14:47] And the idea had come about from this National Geographic documentary about a termite colony that was attacked by ants eventually in the end.

[14:58] And I remembered that particular episode really, really well.

[15:03] And I'd actually also just ordered a couple of books about ants

[15:06] because I did really care about ants at the time.

[15:09] Or care about it? I don't know. I was interested. They were cool.

[15:11] So there I was, you know.

[15:13] It's kind of like the Lana Turner at, what is it, Shraps?

[15:16] Yeah, I think it was at Shraps, yeah.

[15:19] Except for ants.

[15:21] Shraps or Shrabs?

[15:22] Shrabs?

[15:24] Scabs. She was at a place called Scabs.

[15:26] Scabs. God.

[15:30] She really stuck out because everyone else was covered in scabs and sores.

[15:33] It was that leper restaurant.

[15:37] Yeah, it was a longtime L.A. institution for a long time.

[15:41] L.A.pers, it was called.

[15:44] Also scabs.

[15:45] So that was next in this whirlwind through my glorious career.

[15:55] And what now?

[15:56] You came in.

[15:57] That was phase two of your career?

[15:59] Because it seems like phase four of your career should have been Ants.

[16:02] Again, call back to phase four.

[16:05] The only movie Saul Batts ever.

[16:08] Dan is calling back to a joke before we started recording.

[16:11] Is it? I can't remember.

[16:13] And you came on, were you, you were rewriting someone else on Ants

[16:18] or they wanted people to write a movie about Ants?

[16:20] They were mostly throwing away a script.

[16:24] And so I think in the space of six weeks, we were supposed to write a script that Woody Allen would sign on to.

[16:34] Because I assume the original script he had written, and it was about an elderly aunt that falls in love with a grub.

[16:41] And they said, we can't have this.

[16:43] It was.

[16:46] Had I known that it was going to be so problematic, I probably would have done it anyway because I sort of wanted to have a career.

[16:54] But at the time, he was just strange and not deeply strange and upsetting.

[17:00] And, yeah, so then we did a lot of that.

[17:05] And then actually that process, you know, animated films take forever.

[17:10] So it took about two and a half years.

[17:12] And the strangest thing about that, okay, was that for the first time in our lives, we flew on a private jet.

[17:22] Oh, wow.

[17:22] Woody Allen's private jet?

[17:24] And no, it was DreamWorks private jet because DreamWorks was a hugely going concern at the time.

[17:30] And and but the the irony of that or I don't know, the the careful what you wish for that was that the jet would leave at six in the morning from Burbank and return at noon.

[17:44] So you'd have to wake up at 5 o'clock or 4.45 to drive to this jet to fly up for an hour to Palo Alto to work for three hours and then fly down again within the same morning, which was completely bananas and not as fun as it really should be to fly in a private jet.

[18:03] I think the coolest part of Chris's private jet story is hearing the waves crashing in the background.

[18:09] Yeah, I was about to say.

[18:14] um that's my that's my sound machine which i um okay uh well well listen i blame the blue

[18:23] yeti microphone which just picks up the pacific ocean so well uh and so describe that private

[18:31] jet to us like how many people would fit on it uh i guess about 10 people would fit on it um

[18:37] and um you know sometimes it was like oh there's hans zimmer he's coming with us

[18:41] this time, and he'd be like, hey, Hans Zimmer.

[18:43] He was actually really nice.

[18:45] Oh, your boys are flying

[18:47] on the jet today?

[18:48] We're going to talk about the Hans movie.

[18:51] I have to assume that's what he sounds like. I don't know.

[18:53] I've never heard his voice.

[18:54] He sounds a bit like that, actually.

[18:56] But he was

[18:59] very nice. And let me see, you get

[19:01] some nice sandwiches.

[19:03] You get free sandwiches.

[19:04] And Jeffrey

[19:07] Katzenberg is on the plane, too.

[19:09] And so

[19:11] you never really feel as though you can totally kick back.

[19:13] He's so incredibly on the ball about everything

[19:17] that you don't feel as though you can actually enjoy yourself.

[19:21] He's really watching the plane sushi budget

[19:23] to make sure that you don't go over.

[19:25] He's like, I know the trick where you flush it down, Chris,

[19:30] and this plane does not have a system

[19:33] that will handle that kind of roughish in the toilet.

[19:37] You cannot have all you can eat.

[19:38] This is amazing.

[19:40] this is like uh this is your life i i i i was kind of joking when i when i posted the new moon

[19:46] poster um on twitter in answer to your call for subjects but here we are yeah well uh that that

[19:54] joke quickly became stewart's lifeline to something to talk about

[19:58] yeah i'm actually loving looking at what appears to be a kitchen storage um uh shelf you're are

[20:08] you in a back no you're you're in a closet are you in a closet record in a closet yeah okay uh

[20:16] it's is that the basement of henchman's i've never actually asked no no this is this is a uh this is

[20:21] the office slash storage room in charlene in my apartment uh that's why you can see uh boxes of

[20:28] board games in the background and uh and restaurant quality uh shell shelving basically tortilla

[20:36] chips yep restaurant chips oh man you would bite into them and you'd be like i can't buy this at

[20:42] the store i can only get these at restaurants i have to get this wholesale it's not delivery

[20:47] it's the restaurant style

[20:50] so uh so christopher you christopher

[20:57] please refer to me uh this got very serious all of a sudden what are your intentions towards my

[21:07] daughter so you are hot off of ants yeah what's next for uh the what's next what's next for the

[21:17] brothers chris white uh well let me see then we kind of uh oh not that well then then american

[21:24] pie happened because um uh for some reason we went in for a meeting to to to direct i mean you

[21:31] guys probably wanted the job never yes we we've never done it before we wanted to direct pretty

[21:37] much anything and and so uh we we for some reason i think because we thought we wouldn't get the job

[21:43] because we never directed a thing um uh went in and and uh and kind of pitched them on on how we

[21:50] would change the script um uh along with adam hurst the writer and and uh you know the idea

[21:56] was to kind of make it a bit more female friendly although in retrospect there are problematic

[22:00] elements about american pie as well i'm actually now noticing a trail of uh very questionable

[22:06] things in my career woody allen um cyber uh cyber crime yeah i mean it also means that with ants

[22:15] that you wrote something that you wrote for sylvester stallone too right that's true um and

[22:21] i didn't get to meet sylvester stallone but for a while i would read opposite all of the um the

[22:27] character because they didn't of course read you know together so i read opposite j-lo jean hackman

[22:33] woody allen i'm trying to remember who else oh sharon stone um yeah so that was kind of

[22:39] that's amazing you know what i today actually i tweeted about how like i am nearly 42 two years

[22:46] old congratulations you did it thank you and in spite of uh you know it's uh it's coming up soon

[22:53] june 19th everyone uh just so you just throwing it out there that's also that's what they're

[22:58] celebrating his birthday that's also the four years having me on the same day that's the four

[23:03] year anniversary of my bar hinterlands which birthday is more momentous i don't know four

[23:09] years is a big deal for a business but uh it's the fourth anniversary of dan's 38th birthday

[23:15] i tweeted out today about how uh i'm 42 years old and uh despite media telling me that this is a

[23:24] thing that men do i have never masturbated by fucking any sort of food and then i thought to

[23:31] myself oh uh is my friend chris gonna see this and be distressed in some way that i am then i

[23:37] assume you're not jacking it that i want some this siren song of food has called as i assume

[23:44] the next thought you had was why haven't i done that uh-huh so uh maybe pie does feel like sex

[23:52] yeah i mean the movie the movie asked that question you need to answer it tan that's

[23:57] Actually, if you check the IMDb goofs – sorry to bring this up, Chris, for American Pie.

[24:01] In the goofs, it says, in actuality, human vaginas and pies do not feel particularly similar.

[24:06] No, they're quite unlike.

[24:10] I never found the right pie.

[24:14] On the record.

[24:14] You heard it here.

[24:19] Yeah.

[24:19] We just brought you here to trap you.

[24:24] Actually, the only thing I'm thinking about as you recount that anecdote is how young you guys are, like 50 years old.

[24:30] It's bizarre.

[24:31] I always used to be the youngest person in the room.

[24:33] Around the time that I'm describing, I was super young, you know?

[24:37] Yeah, because you must have been, what, like 30 at the time?

[24:40] I was 29 when I started directing and turned 30, I think, on the set, which is so young.

[24:48] It's ridiculous.

[24:48] That's 30 under 30 material right there.

[24:51] Yep.

[24:52] Just made it.

[24:54] Did you did it feel did it did you feel like the older person on the set because the actors were so much younger?

[24:59] Like, was it I did feel I did feel old relative to them because these guys were like often in their first movie.

[25:07] I mean, the great thing about making that was was that the studio was also making Babe, Pig in the City and Meet Joe Black, which were costing them a lot of money.

[25:19] And we cost nothing. And as a result, we were just kind of they just kept.

[25:24] their eyes were on other balls as it were so uh so we just got away with a lot and we got

[25:29] relatively little critique as we went through through the uh process which was amazing

[25:35] amazing and the other experience i had oh sorry well i was just gonna say i mean and despite

[25:40] uh babe pig in the city being a tremendous movie like both of those films did much much worse uh

[25:47] yeah it was very strange i like i i certainly don't take any pride in that i don't think it

[25:52] has anything to do with anything

[25:55] other than the kind of strange tastes of the public.

[25:58] I mean, I bet Meat Joe Black had its own problems.

[26:02] Problems.

[26:03] Yeah, its own thing.

[26:04] In fact, that was three hours long.

[26:07] I think that's part of it.

[26:08] They took an hour and a half movie

[26:10] and remade it as a movie twice that length.

[26:12] Wasn't one of the big selling points of Meat Joe Black

[26:15] that when it premiered,

[26:17] it had the trailer for The Phantom Menace before it?

[26:20] Yeah, it was, I think, yeah.

[26:21] oh really and pete and like famously people went watched like paid for a full ticket watched the

[26:26] trailer and then bounced yeah and then left wow um so so american pie was a big hit like that was

[26:33] huge though it was crazy um it was certainly unexpected i'll say how i know that the studio

[26:39] didn't expect that at all is that uh somebody strolled in from the studio about halfway through

[26:44] shooting and said great news we just sold the foreign rights for four million dollars so like

[26:50] our downside is covered which i didn't mean anything to me but but uh you know it ended

[26:55] up making a hundred and something uh million foreign because they like a laugh too you know

[27:01] although the fact that robbie lives for laughter i've heard so that's like how old soundbite is

[27:10] that is that is for that i don't know i just i remember that from our days together at the daily

[27:15] so it's a long time ago he lives for laughter yeah i my experiences with american pie i remember

[27:22] seeing it in the theater probably in what high school or maybe right my freshman you guys probably

[27:28] had to sneak i was definitely in high school because everyone in my high school was talking

[27:32] about it and through some twist of fate my mom saw it before i did and she was like you got to

[27:36] see this movie she thought it was really funny i remember that she's like you see shannon elizabeth's

[27:43] boobs you've got to see it and i was like mom you're horny and my uh you're a horny team i guess

[27:48] my my second thing was i remember bartending one afternoon and uh eddie k thomas came in with a date

[27:55] and was not very nice to me but that's okay really i'm an asshole

[28:00] i'm sorry no that's okay it's fine this is

[28:05] but this is uh this is the part of the podcast where we air out some dirty laundry

[28:11] Sedan to be Played, Dirty Laundry

[28:13] by Don Henley for me

[28:15] Yeah, that's the signboard cue

[28:17] You know, I've never had any

[28:20] bad experiences

[28:21] with any of the cast members

[28:23] I've never met any of them

[28:25] so I haven't had the opportunity

[28:26] I've had the good experience of watching Chris Klein in

[28:29] Street Fire, The Legend of Chun-Li

[28:31] Yeah, that was a great experience

[28:33] Yes, that was another painful

[28:34] episode for me

[28:36] I mean, he's great

[28:37] He's great

[28:40] It is a tremendously sounding performance.

[28:45] I don't know quite what's happening in it, but I love it.

[28:48] There's a lot happening.

[28:50] There's a lot going on.

[28:51] It reminds me of, you know, we just did our live show this past weekend about Howard the Duck, Tim Robbins' performance in that, where it's like, you kind of get the feeling he was like, nobody cares about what I'm doing.

[29:01] I'm just going to go crazy.

[29:03] Plum Loco.

[29:06] So, but you did a movie with a bunch of younger actors.

[29:11] Do you keep in touch with anyone?

[29:14] I mean, obviously some of them have had very huge careers.

[29:19] Yes.

[29:21] We actually, you know, we are co-producing a movie with Natasha Leone has a new production company.

[29:30] Oh, wow.

[29:31] And we were doing something with her.

[29:32] So I see her around once in a while.

[29:35] She's great.

[29:36] I mean, I still think of them as, like, kids.

[29:38] I saw Sean Scott a little while ago.

[29:40] That was awesome.

[29:42] Yeah, you know, I met them all at a really, like, amazing time in their lives

[29:49] when everything was about to happen.

[29:51] Which, actually, this is maybe the segue to leap past a lot of just dross

[29:57] and get to Twilight Saga, New Moon.

[30:01] Because let's talk about our paths.

[30:04] Let's talk about K-Stew.

[30:06] oh boy okay

[30:08] this is when the real Dirty Laundry comes out

[30:11] Tay Lau

[30:12] so Dan play Dirty Laundry again

[30:14] I don't know

[30:17] how you think we're going to afford the

[30:19] music cue for that

[30:20] but okay

[30:21] I was actually thinking about the other day

[30:23] about making that movie

[30:25] and the utter shock I had

[30:28] when I think we were

[30:29] yeah I think we were all flying to

[30:32] to shoot around the same time

[30:35] There's something where we all had to fly out of LAX at the same time.

[30:38] K-Stew, R-Pats, Teh Lau, myself, bodyguards for K-Stew and R-Pats.

[30:45] And the paparazzi were chasing them and us because I was in the same, you know, whatever, SUV.

[30:52] But chasing them down the street, like, you know, vans, cars, everything.

[30:58] Like, I've never seen anything like it.

[30:59] It was astounding and it was genuinely frightening to see, like, what it.

[31:03] Was it like the beginning of A Hard Day's Night and you guys were laughing and just like pulling pranks, you know, fake beards and things like that?

[31:09] Totally just like that.

[31:13] Girls screaming, running after me.

[31:17] No, it was creeps.

[31:19] It was paparazzi, just the worst form of life.

[31:23] And I thought, like, this is not good.

[31:28] This cannot be good for a person one way or the other.

[31:31] bizarre exposure to to a strange kind of and they knew on some level you know uh that you know like

[31:39] rob and kristen like have done really great stuff since but they knew on some level that what was

[31:46] happening to them was more no relation to who they actually were or what they were doing or frankly

[31:51] you know the the sort of import the real import of what they were doing so it was equally grotesque

[31:56] and bizarre and then if they said that they didn't want it or that you know they wish things

[32:02] were otherwise they would get sort of excoriated but i but it did seem like a really unpleasant

[32:06] way to live i remember when uh christian Stewart was on the daily show when i worked there as a

[32:12] guest and just like leaving one night and the the guest entrance i don't know how i guess they would

[32:20] announce the schedule ahead of time sometimes but it was just like the guest entrance was swarmed

[32:24] with this huge crowd of people who were only there to get her to like sign things that they

[32:28] could sell them and i remember and i remember leaving late that night and as i was leaving

[32:34] like turning back because there was a huge suv parked outside the front door which was very

[32:39] nondescript the door the staff used like you would not even know the daily show was located there

[32:43] i guess if there wasn't a huge sign above it that said that had john that said uh like for if you're

[32:48] looking for larry flint's hustler club go around the corner but uh which which was for many years

[32:53] the billboard that was right up was was john pointing in that direction but uh the and seeing

[32:59] like that like her very like sadly like leaving the front door and getting into that car that

[33:05] like she had to wait for a long time and then use the other entrance just to like just so that she

[33:10] wouldn't be you know mobbed and destroyed and she just seemed so incredibly like sad and lonely it

[33:15] was terrible anyway yeah that's when i reached out my hand to her and we had kind of like a roman

[33:19] holiday style you know just like wild night on the town wow was that when you guys had your

[33:24] your thing if by thing you mean lawsuit yes but no it's just like i mean it was one of those

[33:29] moments where i was like you know because i like i like the spotlight to a certain extent

[33:33] one of those moments where it's like oh i'm so glad that i'm like a nobody in this moment you

[33:37] know well that's like i uh this is gonna sound this is gonna seem so absurd coming on the heels

[33:43] of uh superstar kristen stewart off of superstar uh series uh twilight but you know like obviously

[33:52] podcast uh fame is the smallest fucking slice of fame one could ever have but it is very strange

[34:02] like like like you get like a taste of having people know who you are when you do like a live

[34:08] show or something right and like you go and do these things and don't get me wrong listeners

[34:13] i really appreciate that people care about what we do and i love talking to people but it is very

[34:20] strange to have people excited to see you because you're like wait a minute i know i'm me like so

[34:28] why do you care i'm not even excited to see me i know how i am this is not worth it like and to

[34:34] imagine that like times a billion like it must be the loneliest life to to lead to go through that

[34:40] sort of thing yeah i i think it must be very strange actually the way you're saying reminded

[34:45] me of when i uh when i write a character and anyone has any genuine emotional response to

[34:50] that character and i just think with this no this is some bullshit that i know it's wrong i think

[34:56] that's i think that i remember i was i was sitting in in my underwear and i typed this i don't think

[35:01] that's the secret behind like george lucas and jk rowling and stuff like that is that people are

[35:06] like uh but what about this tiny detail and they're like i don't know i just made it up someday and

[35:11] then i don't care i don't think about that stuff like and of course jk rowling is dedicated to

[35:16] bit by bit destroying everything that she's built but uh whereas george lucas tried to as as much as

[35:22] he could and just could not accomplish it but i think it was i think it was when jk rowling started

[35:27] talking about, was it a real thing

[35:29] when she talked about how her wizards would poop in their pants

[35:31] and then magic away the poop?

[35:32] I think that was an assistant.

[35:34] I think it was an assistant, but it, you know, I think it

[35:37] tracks. Like, if you look at the novels, there's

[35:39] nothing in there that says they don't shit their

[35:41] pants and then magic it away. Are there any

[35:43] scenes of Harry going to the bathroom? I don't think so.

[35:45] I'll allow us to say.

[35:47] Well, it goes to Moaning Myrtle,

[35:49] like, right? Oh, yeah, that's right.

[35:51] There's a ghost in the bathroom.

[35:52] Why did she live in the toilet?

[35:55] Anyway.

[35:55] That's where she died, Dan.

[35:56] She died there, dude.

[35:57] Yeah, come on.

[35:58] Add some respect for a ghost.

[36:00] Here's the, did she say whether the wizards would poop in their pants?

[36:06] Well, where's the pooping, Dan?

[36:07] At a window?

[36:08] Well, I thought it was just like wherever they were.

[36:11] Yeah, in their pants.

[36:13] I don't remember the controversy, but was this all to prevent people having the image of wizards sitting on a toilet?

[36:22] was it that was too undignified so they had to magic away their poop it was let's not talk about

[36:27] i think she was talking about a day uh in it was just about days of old when nights were bold and

[36:31] toilets hadn't been invented you know when people just dropped their loads by roads and they were

[36:36] quite contented but wizards of course would magic it away yeah she said some tremendously terrible

[36:41] things so let's not even bother making fun of her okay so twilight new moon you've shot it what in

[36:46] portland uh no vancouver oddly though after a visit to portland to see the original um

[36:54] location so that we could copy them um kind of brick by brick basically so we rebuilt a facade

[37:02] of bella's house because uh everything is watched very closely by the twiharts um and and you will

[37:08] know if you've made a mistake you you will be called out um before before actually the movie

[37:14] comes out because they'll see pictures from from on set so there's a huge controversy um when uh

[37:21] edward's uh suv was uh brown and not whatever color it was supposed to be before that but that

[37:26] was the deal that we got from volvo man now i've seen i think the first three of these movies maybe

[37:37] maybe just the first two um is that's twilight twilight new moon and twilight the search for

[37:44] spock i apologize chris for not remembering witches and which is the baseball scene no

[37:50] there are no witches at all is there a true blood season two dan which one has the baseball in it

[37:57] is that was that yours would be the no that would be the first one i could not for the life of me

[38:02] think of how to shoot that well that's what i was about to wonder like i was about to ask like when

[38:07] you get a source material that has let's say difficult difficult yes to visualize elements

[38:16] like sparkly vampires what do you do in those situations i think the only way that you can

[38:23] actually survive is to is to um take it all quite seriously so i do remember saying something like

[38:30] so we're gonna really we're gonna revamp no i didn't say it that way actually

[38:34] Because then he winked.

[38:35] And then you winked at people with a gleam in your eye.

[38:39] We're going to try and do it for the sparkle on the vampires.

[38:43] Yeah, like it was to take it all quite seriously.

[38:50] I think I told you guys the story about how I didn't want Taylor Swift to be in the movie

[38:56] because it would throw people too much from the reality of the movie.

[39:00] They would say, two Taylors in one movie?

[39:04] yeah impossible what is this fiddler on the roof there's only one taylor

[39:09] what is this tinker taylor taylor take it very seriously like yeah

[39:14] taylor taylor's five we're out of soldiers can i throw in an extra taylor it's not really the

[39:22] same thing please my boss is gonna fire me if i don't close this account what if i give you

[39:27] three taylors look everyone knows that it's colin firth who did it anyway so just take this extra

[39:32] taylor uh so sorry but you're saying uh so what was i don't know you know very seriously going

[39:38] into the designing of the volturi um you know uh palace uh thing uh you know but like you got to

[39:44] take it uh everything with with dead seriousness which actually is also like it would have been

[39:50] lame to be sort of ironic about the way that i was making it actually at the time i remember

[39:54] thinking like this is going to be you know like the first one was kind of poppy and cool and fun

[40:00] And this is going to be sort of widescreen, sort of lush presentation.

[40:04] It's going to be Empire Strikes Back to the first one, Star Wars.

[40:08] Where you can like deepen it and make it a little more sophisticated.

[40:12] And Michael Sheen was in this one, right?

[40:15] Michael Sheen was, and he was so much fun.

[40:18] I feel like he's like the perfect guy for that kind of thing.

[40:21] Because he, man, he's, oh, I love that guy.

[40:24] He will go for it.

[40:26] Doolittle, he came out unscathed.

[40:30] He really just enjoyed himself, but without kind of being like one of the sort of British guys that you hire who are just kind of chewing the scenery and winking at the audience at the same time.

[40:42] He was deeply into it.

[40:44] And, yeah, he said he was basing his character on the blue meanies from Yellow Submarine.

[40:50] That is amazing.

[40:54] And then Dakota Fanning, lovely Dakota Fanning, was a huge Twihard.

[41:01] And so we were able to get her to be in this movie.

[41:05] It's like a relatively small part, but she has like five lines, but it's amazing and kind of creepy.

[41:13] Actually, there's a lot I don't remember from the movie, but I remember her very well from it, even though it was not a huge part.

[41:19] Why is that?

[41:20] Just because it's been a while, and I've seen the –

[41:23] It's been a while.

[41:24] I've seen the other movies in the series so many times, but I've only seen that one the one time.

[41:28] So, you know, I'm like, oh, is it like the scene in Twilight 4 when they're fighting over that lava pit?

[41:34] No, no, no.

[41:34] What about the scene where he's climbing the Empire State Building and he's got Bella in his hand?

[41:39] No, no, wait.

[41:40] Hold on.

[41:40] That's King Kong.

[41:42] What about – is it –

[41:44] I think I heard you say –

[41:46] The best thing to say was that you didn't want to see it again after your first experience in the cinema because nothing would be as great.

[41:52] Oh, I know home viewing, it was just not going to match up to that same experience of being there.

[41:57] And get the energy of the crowd, you know, the energy of the crowd in the theater.

[42:00] Oh, yeah.

[42:02] It was just such a beautiful experience.

[42:04] I was like, I don't think my system can handle it a second time.

[42:07] So you're saying you forgot all about it, and what can I remind you of?

[42:11] Well, I remember, so was it in the novel that the werewolves don't like to wear shirts when they're people?

[42:16] That's a good question.

[42:18] Yes, I think that's right.

[42:20] I think so.

[42:22] It wasn't just because I like seeing cute boys with no shirts on.

[42:27] I mean, that's fair.

[42:27] No, it's because they run super hot.

[42:31] They're feverish, right, all the time.

[42:33] They run like 106 feet at all times.

[42:36] That makes sense.

[42:37] Obviously.

[42:38] Yeah, it makes sense.

[42:39] They're hot-blooded.

[42:40] Check it and see.

[42:41] Like you were saying, you were taking it really seriously,

[42:44] and it feels like that sounds like the best way to have fun with a project like that,

[42:47] probably, is to take it seriously and to really get into the details of it

[42:51] and want it to be as cool as you can make it?

[42:54] I think I wanted it to be as good for the fans

[43:00] as I could make it,

[43:01] as much of a fan-pleasing experience.

[43:04] But actually, I also remember being deeply depressed

[43:06] the whole time I was making it.

[43:08] I'm sorry to bring you back there.

[43:10] But for a while, it used to be that way.

[43:12] So American Pie, I was super happy while I was making it.

[43:15] It was just the best thing.

[43:16] And I was like, oh, this is for me.

[43:17] This is like a filmmaker's life for me.

[43:21] And then every movie afterwards, I just kind of realized how much I could screw up or how things could go wrong and how often you were foiled doing it and trying to do what you want to do.

[43:34] And so it became this incredibly stressful experience, and I usually fall into a depression at some point during the process.

[43:41] Well, that's what I wanted to ask.

[43:43] Oh, sorry.

[43:44] No, you go ahead.

[43:45] I'll save my question.

[43:46] I want to ask, you know, like, not to, I don't want to make you feel any worse.

[43:53] Is this really, if anything, that he has this many mea culpas ahead of time?

[43:57] I don't know.

[43:57] No, no, no.

[43:58] This doesn't sound good.

[43:59] Like, anyone I know who's been in show business.

[44:01] But how do you sleep at night?

[44:03] How dare you?

[44:05] Basically, anyone I know who's been in show business for a long time seems very, very weary all the time.

[44:14] i was just wondering uh what you thought was the most sort of pleasant and uh like personally

[44:21] rewarding experience whether or not it was uh i you know regardless of of product um well i think

[44:29] as as a as a part of filmmaking i think editing is is is my joy i love it um it's like it's like

[44:38] video games and puzzles and, um, watching movies and, uh, you know, finding little Easter eggs,

[44:46] uh, all the time. And that, that's really great. Um, you know, specifically, I guess making American

[44:53] pie is, is hard to beat, uh, in terms of just how much fun it was from beginning to end, because

[44:58] not knowing, um, all the things that could go wrong or, uh, you know, not knowing, not having

[45:04] any expectations whatsoever um and then uh you know about a boy i think uh the final result was

[45:11] really sort of uh uh delightful and the way that people received it that was the super gratifying

[45:17] i was gonna i was gonna ask before you've made kind of like big budget kind of big scope movies

[45:24] and you've made smaller kind of human-sized movies and i wondered if you felt more comfortable with

[45:30] with the one or the other with the with the human sized ones or with the ones where you get to do

[45:35] whatever you want or not whatever you want because yeah i think i think i've i think i've figured it

[45:39] out now which is um my ideal movie to direct now would be two people sitting at a table talking

[45:45] like i don't want i realized that the reason that i'm not particularly good at directing action is

[45:50] that i don't really like it i mean i get it it's fine but um you know like the last movie i made

[45:56] operation finale had a couple of car chases in it and i was like i okay well how are they going to

[46:00] catch them or they won't and so why don't we get to the part where they do or they don't catch them

[46:04] rather than having to do all the stuff where you know cars are doing uh unlikely things um and so

[46:11] yeah i like that i like now i think i really like the small ones and the problem with directing the

[46:15] really huge ones is you think you've got all of these amazing you do have incredible resources

[46:19] at your disposal but the stress level is so high because having spent so much money on these things

[46:25] uh the studio is freaking out constantly um and uh you know quite reasonably expecting you to

[46:32] make a movie that will pay back at least part of their investment um so that that's super stressful

[46:37] so i think i think little movies are are the way to go these days and i was gonna ask with having

[46:44] worked on twilight new moon even though it was a kind of a different role you then went on to work

[46:49] on uh star wars rogue one did any of your experiences working in an existing like universe

[46:56] or an existing like novel inform how you approached uh working on a star wars movie

[47:02] i mean that was a bit different just because i you know i i from age seven i was completely all

[47:09] about star wars all the time although it was only really the original trilogy um not you know so i

[47:15] I feel like ultra-Orthodox.

[47:17] You weren't pitching on that Sebulba spinoff?

[47:20] The Bulb.

[47:23] That's about when he was a detective.

[47:27] Like what, a Grand Admiral Thrawn origin picture or something?

[47:31] Nope.

[47:34] Wanted no part of it.

[47:36] You know, I knew what I liked.

[47:38] So actually, really, there I kind of knew I was the choir that I was preaching to.

[47:43] So that was kind of great.

[47:45] You know, I think, like, that's as close as I've ever been to making a fan film, right?

[47:54] It was, like, it was fanfic, although not slash fic, but, you know.

[47:57] Well, I don't know.

[47:59] I can imagine that being fun because, like, I remember there was a time that I wrote a Simpsons spec script.

[48:06] And it was, like, you know, at that point, the Simpsons had already been on the air for, like, 16, 17 years or whatever.

[48:13] And I was like, this is the worst thing to write a spec script for because no one's going to care.

[48:18] No one's going to look at this and be like, yeah, that's the hip new show that you're writing a spec script for.

[48:22] But like it was also just so much more enjoyable because I'm like, OK, this is a thing that I grew up with and I feel like I know who these people are.

[48:30] Absolutely. I mean, yeah, that was I actually I should say in terms of sort of peak experiences, just getting to work on that was was up there because it was what I felt like.

[48:42] sort of been heading toward my whole life uh really and i just like that and and one of the

[48:48] most uh intense experiences uh in hollywood for me was to go to that first uh meeting where i knew

[48:55] that that there was a possibility i could write a star wars movie not knowing what it was going to

[48:59] be because everything is like super top secret or whatever um and then finding out it was going to

[49:05] be for you know the story of the the opening crawl it was like this is sort of uh full full circle

[49:10] like weird parallel universe experience that was cool cool all right okay well that's the way

[49:21] stewart ends his energy cool yeah cool and then takes a drink

[49:26] so chris uh you want to ask us anything

[49:32] now you get your questions well that way this is now we have to do the thing where it goes

[49:38] We go, what's next for Chris Weitz?

[49:40] Gosh, putting children to bed, which involves a lot of shouting somehow.

[49:49] I get it.

[49:50] Telling people the same thing over and over again.

[49:52] It's just fucking...

[49:53] Oh, half my day is me going, Sammy, brush your teeth, brush your teeth, brush your teeth, brush your teeth, brush your teeth.

[50:01] And he's like, Daddy, let me tell you about...

[50:03] Brush your teeth.

[50:03] Let me tell you about this thing.

[50:05] Do you think a snake could beat an owl in a fight?

[50:08] Like that's the – and we did do research on that.

[50:10] But that sounds like fun.

[50:10] Yeah, it turns –

[50:11] At least he's saying something.

[50:12] It turns out that the snake and the owl – it depends on the snake.

[50:14] It depends on the owl, really.

[50:16] Well, definitely if you go by the Mexican flag, right, there's an eagle kicking the shit out of a snake.

[50:24] Yeah, yeah.

[50:24] So I'd imagine that another raptor would be able to handle it.

[50:28] But the colonial flag before Mexico gained independence shows the eagle paying off the snake.

[50:32] Oh, wow.

[50:33] To throw the flag.

[50:34] Oh, it's all cave-in flag.

[50:37] Yeah, it's all – yeah, the snake is the – actually, the thing is the snake is the baby face and the eagle is the heel.

[50:42] And it's all being set up so that you're like, snake, come on, snake, win it back.

[50:46] But they never made the next flag.

[50:48] So I guess we never –

[50:49] I mean, he doesn't even have arms and legs and wings and shit.

[50:52] Like, that's unfair.

[50:53] You've got to root for him.

[50:55] Yeah, it's true.

[50:56] He's the underdog.

[50:56] Well, here's the thing.

[50:57] It's like – do I have questions for you?

[50:59] It's like this weird experience of the fact that you have – I have heard you speak more than you will probably ever hear me speak, right?

[51:07] And because we've had our conversations together, but I've heard hundreds of hundreds of hours of you guys talking to each other.

[51:14] Like, I know everything I need to know.

[51:16] You know, I've been meaning to talk to you about that, Chris.

[51:18] If you could just tape yourself and email it to me, that would be just talking and just to work out the payback.

[51:26] Yeah.

[51:26] So, OK, so let's say the Flophouse movie is getting made.

[51:33] You're going to meet with us.

[51:34] What's your what's your take?

[51:36] What's your angle on it?

[51:37] Oh, wow.

[51:38] Yeah, okay.

[51:40] I'd say – I'd probably say we know about the podcast.

[51:48] What about the podcasters?

[51:50] What do they do in their lives outside of the podcast?

[51:56] It would be kind of a Shakespeare in love maybe kind of thing.

[51:59] Cool.

[51:59] And like maybe it would be about an episode, but how your kind of action-packed lives outside of it influence the way that that episode goes.

[52:09] I like it.

[52:10] Maybe we do a little sort of like a weird sort of narrative jumping back and forth.

[52:15] like i was just watching this movie assassin by uh what is it the japanese film uh by shinoda

[52:23] uh or like yes some kind of like japanese samurai film where they're like talking about the first

[52:30] time they met somebody and then you flash back to that yeah i think i'd like that or maybe an

[52:34] origin story actually maybe how you three guys met be like a rise of one of those rise ofs yeah

[52:40] yeah i was hoping he was going to that you're going to say chris that

[52:45] dan inherits an old movie theater and we all have to get a little bit

[52:49] i think that's the sitcom oh right right well i mean the real great one is like it has always been

[52:58] uh where i um sort of play this kind of this long con and like you know befriend you guys

[53:07] and eventually take my terrible revenge.

[53:09] I've joked about this before,

[53:14] but even that is part of the long con.

[53:16] It's just to really sort of get you guys to trust me.

[53:20] I know what you did eight years ago, nine years ago.

[53:25] I know what you did on that podcast

[53:30] and so does everybody else.

[53:31] I know the thing that you did that did not harm my...

[53:37] my career at all because who gives a shit about these three assholes it's a long title that you

[53:42] know okay my my my filthy take on i know youtube was always i blew who you did last summer i don't

[53:50] know why and that was like a joke that i told myself yeah the problem is with twitter the jokes

[54:00] that i tell myself are now the jokes i tell everyone unfortunately yeah that is yeah that

[54:05] is a problem although dan actually which reminds me that that i i saw a picture of the um of the

[54:13] yoda statue outside of lucasfilm presidio with the uh with the words um matter black lives do

[54:21] written in green uh you know spray painted in green underneath it and my first thought was

[54:25] where were you when i needed you you green fuck because when i was when i was uh you know calling

[54:32] out the empire for white supremacy um uh i was uh getting all kinds of hate hate tweets and emails

[54:39] and stuff where was you yeah i like that i like that graffiti because it's they use uh that yoda

[54:45] use green so you know for sure it's yoda that's the only indicator right it's reassuring it's the

[54:51] only color you can see oh wow that's kind of sad actually that's why it's on dagobah it's like very

[54:57] No wonder he was hitting

[55:00] R2-D2 with his stick so much

[55:01] He couldn't see him

[55:02] He was just trying to figure out where that guy was

[55:04] Well guys

[55:06] I think we're winding down

[55:08] And I'm getting really hot

[55:09] Dan's tired

[55:11] We went through a chunk of Chris' career

[55:15] We started a new celebrity feud

[55:17] Chris vs Yoda

[55:18] I will have

[55:19] Chris Weitz back on the show

[55:22] Anytime he wants to come back

[55:23] Gentlemen

[55:25] gentlemen it's been an honor uh thank you so much for being with us and let us letting us

[55:32] needle you about your career while learning great things about your career uh before it was great i

[55:38] think i may have missed bath time which would be the best that's kind of that's kind of why i

[55:43] scheduled the podcast when i did is because i was trying to skip half time yeah but it's your

[55:48] bat stewart i know but i don't like bats sorry i missed bath time i guess stinky stew in bed again

[55:56] tonight uh before we wrap up we should mention again that we just posted our uh our live show

[56:05] on youtube uh and that's a live show that is for charity where we talk about how are the duck and

[56:11] i think as of the day that this releases we're still accepting uh receipts of donations of 20

[56:19] dollars or more you can go to flophousepodcast.com to find out information about that um we've

[56:24] already received an overwhelming amount of uh donations which is amazing i'm kind of blown away

[56:30] uh anything else you guys want to add uh yeah we've had over 900 emails sent to us with uh

[56:39] proof of donation and each of those is a uh minimum twenty dollar donation because they're

[56:46] raffle entries so uh you can do the math but that's the minimum of what we've made and um i

[56:51] mean eventually we will not that not what we've made we're going to it's in donations none of

[56:56] that money made for made for charity i want everyone to be clear the money did not go to us

[57:02] it is for charity well i don't know how it could have ellie because we were sending people directly

[57:06] to charities but sure let's make it clear the charity we were sending them to was the flop house

[57:11] institute for special charity studies all for charity uh and uh uh we uh donated uh 10k

[57:20] ourselves to charity we're so uh proud of all of the listeners who donated we're so glad that they

[57:26] were uh able to do so yes we uh for the raffle we will be accepting um uh proof of donation

[57:36] uh the day that this drops still that will be the last day that we'll be accepting it for the raffle

[57:41] but you know for your own karma for your own beliefs uh to help people uh you can donate

[57:48] whenever you like there are other reasons to donate besides to just win flop house merchandise

[57:52] as strange as that sounds so please keep doing it uh but thank you yes stewart if you go to the

[57:58] flophouse uh youtube page which is youtube.com slash c slash the flophouse podcast or you can

[58:04] just google it dan are you leaving the door are you leaving the door open for people to

[58:08] send you uh receipts of donations and in exchange you'll send them nudes because i think there's an

[58:15] audience for it it's not just me i think there's other people that'd be into that not just you

[58:21] thank you uh we can talk off air by the way dan i'm not in the market for that so please don't

[58:26] please don't accept any receipts you have increased the i'm not gonna say that i was

[58:32] gonna say i was gonna increase the you're increasing the likelihood of me sending you

[58:36] but i don't even want to please do not do that neutral nude sending so um yeah no thank you all

[58:42] yes thank you all for your amazing generosity uh and that show is up to watch whenever you

[58:49] might want to it is much longer than we intended so it's better to watch it now when you can stop

[58:55] it and go do other stuff in the middle maybe uh skip the third or fourth time we talk about

[59:02] whether ducks can have boobs or not uh yeah and so chris do you have anything that you'd like to

[59:08] either plug or increase awareness of before we go uh no i mean i certainly don't have anything to

[59:16] plug and i think that people are aware of what they should be aware of exactly right now so i

[59:20] don't think anything i could add would actually i mean i i'm gonna you know i keep on thinking my

[59:25] my next tweet is really gonna push uh uh civil rights over the top in this country so many times

[59:32] especially during the quarantine i've had to be like hey pay attention to your children there's

[59:36] no way that the tweet you are working on right now is going to get trump removed from office

[59:40] or end racism so you might as well do something else i'm like you're right brain you're right

[59:45] yeah you can try that uh okay well thank you everyone thank you listeners for listening

[59:54] uh we love you all uh be safe uh do good in the world uh for the flop house i've been dan mccoy

[1:00:02] i've been stewart wellington i'm elliot calen thanking our very special guest who is

[1:00:08] chris weitz thank you guys thank you all out there in uh flop house land all the flops at sea

[1:00:17] good night everyone if you're like chris and are listening to us as you go to sleep

[1:00:24] we are the host of my brother my brother me and now nearly 10 years into our podcast the secret

[1:00:37] can be revealed, all the clues are in place, and the world's greatest treasure hunt can now begin.

[1:00:42] Embedded in each episode of My Brother, My Brother and Me is a micro clue that will lead you to 14

[1:00:48] precious gemstones all around this big, beautiful, blue world of ours. So start combing through the

[1:00:53] episodes. Let's say starting at episode 101 on. Yeah, the early episodes are pretty problematic,

[1:00:59] so there's no clues in those episodes. No, no, not at all. The better ones, the good ones,

[1:01:05] clues ahoy listen to every episode repeatedly in sequence laugh if you must but mainly get all the

[1:01:12] great clues my brother my brother me it's an advice show kind of but a treasure hunt mainly

[1:01:17] anywhere you find podcasts or treasure maps my brother my brother me the hunt is on

[1:01:22] maximumfun.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported

FH Mini 9 - Return to New Moon

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