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FH Mini 54 - Happy Belated Mother's Day

mini May 14, 2022 00:56:00
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Transcript

[0:00] Hello, and welcome to the Flop House. My name is Elliot Kalin, and I'm joined tonight, it's
[0:10] nighttime when we're doing this, and it's daytime where you are possibly, look out the
[0:14] window, night has fallen, just through the power of my voice, deal with it. But I'm joined
[0:18] tonight by...
[0:19] Dan McCoy, who's, you know, you could have just not made any prediction about the time
[0:25] of day, and Stuart Wellington, and it's nighttime where I'm at, too.
[0:29] Yeah, that's true. It's nighttime where all three of us are at, currently.
[0:34] And it's now nighttime where you, the listener, are. Close your eyes, unless you're driving,
[0:39] and imagine that it is a deep, dark night, the witching hour, when spooks and spirits
[0:44] and ghouls and ghosts come out of the graveyard, because it's time to celebrate a belated Mother's
[0:51] Day!
[0:52] Oh, no!
[0:53] That's right, everybody. It was Mother's Day a week ago, and we're going to be doing
[0:57] some mom talk about moms at the movies. But first, Dan, why don't we have a mom fun drive,
[1:03] I'm sorry, MaxFunDrive update. How did things go a week ago when MaxFunDrive ended, and
[1:08] where are we at in terms of rewards for our listeners?
[1:12] You know what? It went really well. It went really well. We smashed the first goal, the
[1:21] one that we...
[1:23] The phantom smashin' evil.
[1:24] Yeah, that we were really hoping to get.
[1:25] He slammed evil.
[1:26] I'm sorry. Dan, can you go back and say we slammed the first reward level?
[1:30] Elliot, can you pen a letter to Billy Zane to apologize?
[1:34] I'll do that. Dear Mr. Zane, I take pen in hand to apologize for misremembering the slogan
[1:40] to your hit film, The Phantom.
[1:41] But, you know, so we're going to be sending out... It'll be to a total of 30 listeners
[1:48] who were new, upgrading, boosting this time around. We'll get those names from people
[1:56] and, you know, people at the MaxFun...
[2:00] As opposed to going to a cave and asking a bear for the names.
[2:03] We're going to ask the heavens for it.
[2:06] Here, let me go look into my scrying pool, Dan, and hopefully the spirits of the waters
[2:11] will give us the names.
[2:13] We're going to find those names and we're going to use a randomizer to pick 30 people,
[2:17] 10 of whom will get signed copies of Elliot's Maniac of New York comic, 10 from Stew.
[2:25] I believe there was Swag of some kind.
[2:28] Swag was promised. Swag will be delivered.
[2:32] And then from me, I will...
[2:33] The S in Swag stands for Stewart and the W stands for Wellington.
[2:36] I will get in contact...
[2:37] Stewart Wellington audience gifts. Swag.
[2:40] Yeah, I will get in contact with those members and be like,
[2:44] hey, what favorite movies do you want me to draw something from?
[2:49] They're probably going to want to get drawings of the pregnancy scene
[2:51] in Sonic the Hedgehog the movie.
[2:54] They all picked Cheeky for some reason.
[2:57] I mean, I could do it.
[3:00] But anyway, so we also...
[3:04] You know what?
[3:05] We fell just a tiny bit short of the country bears, but it was within...
[3:12] It was 61 short.
[3:15] We're going to...
[3:16] We're just going to do it, guys.
[3:18] We're not going to be dicks about it.
[3:20] We came so close.
[3:21] We're going to do the country bears commentary.
[3:25] If I learned anything from being a parent, it's that you set limits and then you allow
[3:28] your children to blast through those limits and you reward them anyway.
[3:32] So let's do it.
[3:33] The thing is, you know, whatever.
[3:35] It's been a very tough several years.
[3:39] The fact that we did as well in this drive.
[3:42] Thank you so much during a difficult time.
[3:45] Like I just, you know, yeah.
[3:48] Thank you for thank you for being a friend.
[3:51] Travel down the road and back again.
[3:53] And thank you for also the pledges.
[3:56] And to return to say you're welcome.
[3:59] And thank you.
[4:02] We will to our listeners.
[4:07] We're going to do this country bears commentary.
[4:09] It may not be right off.
[4:13] We haven't figured out when we're going to schedule it.
[4:14] But it's not going to be for a little while before the end of this calendar year.
[4:19] After this pledge drive, we will do the country bears.
[4:23] Hey, I just want to jump in and apologize if you guys are for all you that are watching
[4:28] at home.
[4:28] And if I look if I look a little confused, it's because my cat Meatball has the zoomies
[4:34] right now and is adorable because he chirps while he's doing it like a little bird.
[4:39] But he's not accomplishing much.
[4:41] Like, where is he going to go?
[4:43] Well, put your mind at ease.
[4:46] There's no one watching.
[4:48] But I dressed up.
[4:49] Why did I dress up?
[4:50] Well, you are wearing a what appears to be maybe a velvet sort of smoking jacket with
[4:57] a robe.
[4:58] What's underneath it?
[4:59] No, it's a robe.
[5:00] OK, it's a robe in the smoking jacket style.
[5:03] Let us be clear to I am not doing a bit right now.
[5:08] Stewart is showing its big Hugh Hefner vibes.
[5:11] Yeah, it's sort of like a maroon robe with a black.
[5:14] Yeah, respectfully, Hugh Hefner.
[5:15] Yeah.
[5:16] Yeah, I will say before we get off the Max Fund Drive entirely, I also want to say thank
[5:21] you, everybody.
[5:22] And I will say one of the best things about this year's Max Fund Drive was I heard a lot
[5:26] from listeners who in the past didn't feel like they had the means to support us.
[5:31] And now we're like, I got a job where I can pledge.
[5:33] That was the best part of it, was hearing about all these listeners who are feeling
[5:38] more financially secure and have employment that they're happy about.
[5:41] And that was a wonderful, not predicted side benefit of Max Fund Drive.
[5:46] That is a very nice message that we sort of get like inadvertently as part of the way
[5:51] things are set up.
[5:52] It's like, oh, yeah, great.
[5:53] Like, I'm glad that so many people seem to like, I don't know, things are looking up.
[5:57] I hope for folks.
[5:59] Hopefully.
[6:00] I mean, what it also tells me is we have to cultivate more of a billionaire audience.
[6:04] So so, Elon, if you're listening, well, I still don't like you.
[6:09] Yeah, I'm down.
[6:10] You should stop it.
[6:12] They can start listening to something else.
[6:13] And then I could I could trick them into walking into this guillotine I have set up.
[6:18] Oh, God, what?
[6:19] I mean, now you're threatening a public figure.
[6:21] Billionaires.
[6:24] I don't know that legally it's I'm not threatening anything.
[6:27] I've just set up a guillotine.
[6:30] He's right.
[6:31] Legally, you can chop the head off a billionaire.
[6:33] It's in the law.
[6:34] It's in the legal code.
[6:35] Yeah, Thomas Jefferson put it in there.
[6:38] As long as you don't do it yourself, you just set up a guillotine and they stumble into it
[6:41] like some kind of French farce.
[6:43] That's a revolution farce.
[6:45] Inspector Clouseau sort of figure.
[6:47] What if what if they did a door, a bedroom door slamming French farce?
[6:51] But it's set during the French Revolution.
[6:52] So instead of door slams, it's a guillotine chopping.
[6:56] People are just kind of jumping into the wrong guillotine and people just leave a room and go
[7:00] into a guillotine, I guess.
[7:01] Yeah, I guess you lose the cast.
[7:05] You need a very large cast for something like that.
[7:07] Kind of sounds like the house from 13 ghosts.
[7:10] Oh, yeah.
[7:12] Hey, Elliot, remember 13 ghosts?
[7:15] Yeah, I do remember.
[7:16] That old house, F.
[7:18] Murray Abraham's house is made out of glass.
[7:21] Yeah.
[7:22] And like writing on all the glass.
[7:24] Now, is that what the glass house the movie is about?
[7:27] Is it about F.
[7:28] Murray Abraham's house?
[7:29] And Lili Sobieski has to go live there.
[7:31] And then Stella Skarsgård.
[7:34] With F.
[7:34] Murray Abraham.
[7:36] Yeah.
[7:38] Guys, have you ever have you ever played the game?
[7:40] Fuck, Mary Abraham.
[7:41] Now, that's when you get three names.
[7:43] And you just say, who are you going to F?
[7:45] Who are you going to marry?
[7:46] And who are you going to Abraham?
[7:48] Which in this case is kill as well as pretend that you're going to kill.
[7:52] But then God says at the end, no, it's fine.
[7:55] God says, psych, you don't have to do it.
[7:57] Your son's fine.
[7:59] It's fine.
[7:59] You can do a country bears of your life.
[8:02] Your relationship with your child has been ruined.
[8:05] Yeah.
[8:06] Any sense of trust is gone.
[8:08] I mean, you have back in biblical times.
[8:11] Dads and sons didn't have good relationships.
[8:13] OK.
[8:15] So we've had a lot of fun tonight.
[8:17] We've talked about a lot of great things.
[8:19] And it's time to get to the serious part of the episode.
[8:22] OK, guys, I'm behind.
[8:25] I'm at the wheel this time.
[8:28] And it's not a car wheel.
[8:29] We're on a ship.
[8:30] So things might get a little rocky and you might get a little seasick because we're going
[8:34] to play a little game tonight that I don't think you're going to enjoy very much.
[8:38] But maybe you will.
[8:39] I don't know.
[8:40] A lot of times we've done games where we have to identify things or we have to guess titles
[8:44] for things or whether Eric Roberts is in a movie or not.
[8:48] I wanted to I wanted to indulge a different part of your brain than just wrote trivia
[8:52] memory.
[8:53] And I'm going to bring us to a debating game.
[8:57] That's right.
[8:58] You two are about to engage in a series of debates on the subject of moms.
[9:02] That's right.
[9:03] It's everyone's favorite debating game.
[9:05] Mansplain, the debating game for white cishet upper class nerds.
[9:09] It's a special Mother's Day mom versus mom edition.
[9:12] So here's how it goes.
[9:13] You two will be debating each other in a series of rounds choosing between two moms from the
[9:19] movies.
[9:19] You're going to debate which mom is the better mom, which which why should I choose that
[9:23] mom as my mom?
[9:25] And so there's going to be a number there's a number of categories you're going to take
[9:30] turns being the one who chooses first, which mom you're going to you're going to argue
[9:33] the case of.
[9:34] You're going to do this classic debating style.
[9:36] The person who chooses will get one minute for your opening statement.
[9:39] Your opponent will get one minute for his rebuttal, and then the person who chose will
[9:43] get 30 seconds for their counter rebuttal.
[9:45] I may also let the clock run longer if I feel like it or if I forget how much time has gone
[9:50] and points are going to be awarded by me on a painstakingly arbitrary manner.
[9:57] So don't worry.
[10:00] This is a high level of forensics and just random choice.
[10:04] So, let's begin with the first round
[10:07] of this Mom vs. Mom edition of Mansplain,
[10:09] the debating game for white, cis-head, upper-class nerds.
[10:11] So, okay, this is the first round.
[10:15] Dan, you get to choose which side you're taking first
[10:18] because I imagine you are more nervous than Stuart.
[10:22] This first round is supportive,
[10:25] single, suburban moms in the movies.
[10:27] Who would you like to argue the case
[10:28] of there being a better mom?
[10:29] Patricia Arquette in Boyhood, that's right,
[10:31] the woman who spent over a decade of her life
[10:34] having to hang out with Richard Linklater
[10:35] for weekends at a time to be in a movie about a kid
[10:38] who, to be honest, is not that special a kid,
[10:41] or would you rather argue the case of Dee Wallace
[10:44] who has to put up with a wrinkly alien
[10:46] hiding in her child's bedroom closet?
[10:48] Would you like to argue in favor of the mom in Boyhood
[10:51] or the mom in E.T.?
[10:52] I'm gonna go with Dee Wallace, Elliot.
[10:55] Okay, could have seen that coming.
[10:56] So, Stuart, you'll be arguing the case
[10:58] of Patricia Arquette in Boyhood,
[10:59] Academy Award-winning performance.
[11:00] The movie, of course, lost Best Picture to Birdman,
[11:04] perhaps the second most forgotten Best Picture winner
[11:06] of the last 20 years.
[11:07] What a fucking turn.
[11:08] The first most forgotten Best Picture winner
[11:10] of the last 20 years, of course, The Artist,
[11:12] a movie I routinely forget existed.
[11:14] It won Best Picture.
[11:15] All right, so, Dan, that's neither here nor there.
[11:18] Let's go, your minute starts now.
[11:20] Tell me, why is Dee Wallace the better mom in E.T.?
[11:23] And go.
[11:25] You know, there's an extraterrestrial in her home,
[11:29] and she doesn't react with sort of the panic
[11:33] of a woman who wonders,
[11:35] maybe this has brought interdimensional,
[11:38] otherworldly viruses, like diseases, into my house.
[11:45] Instead, she's worried only for the safety of her children
[11:49] and for that lovable scamp, E.T.,
[11:52] and, you know, this may be extra-textural,
[11:55] but, of course, Dee Wallace-
[11:57] That's okay, also, it's E.T., yeah, extraterrestrial.
[12:00] He's the extra-textual extraterrestrial, yeah.
[12:02] Also, did a bang-up job protecting her son
[12:06] from that rabid Saint Bernard.
[12:08] Not so much in the book.
[12:10] In the book, she didn't do so well,
[12:12] but you know what?
[12:13] That book character was not Dee Wallace.
[12:15] In the book of E.T., you're saying?
[12:17] Yeah, only in the movie, yeah.
[12:19] Yeah, neither in the book of E.T. or in Cujo did they say-
[12:24] Oh, sorry, Dan, you said the word Cujo
[12:26] just as the minute ran out,
[12:27] so I can't give you points for that part.
[12:29] As far as I know, you think that the book of E.T.
[12:31] had an angry dog in it, so you'll get your points for that.
[12:37] Stu, it's your turn.
[12:38] You have one minute to tell me
[12:40] why Patricia Arquette in Boyhood is the better mom, and go.
[12:45] What is time?
[12:48] Time is a thing that is ever-marching onward.
[12:51] Patricia Arquette knows this all too well
[12:54] in the movie Boyhood.
[12:55] Let me explain it to you.
[12:57] She has this child.
[12:58] The child is with her quite a bit.
[13:01] She has multiple partners, some of whom are drunks,
[13:06] and Ethan Hawke is always hanging around.
[13:08] And I was wondering, in The Northman,
[13:11] do you think Ethan Hawke had a muscle suit on?
[13:14] Because he looked kind of bulky,
[13:16] but I don't think he looks that bulky in real life.
[13:18] That's a good question I just asked.
[13:20] So, the other thing is, Patricia Arquette is great.
[13:24] She, didn't she speak to ghosts on a TV show,
[13:28] and she was in Lost Highway?
[13:30] What a picture.
[13:31] So, what I'm trying to explain is,
[13:36] Cujo.
[13:42] And I think that's it.
[13:43] That's a minute, right?
[13:45] Yep, that's a minute.
[13:47] Strong start.
[13:48] You kind of lost your way a little bit in the middle there.
[13:50] Dan, now it's, okay, this is the final round
[13:53] of the first round.
[13:54] Dan, you have 30 seconds to have your counter-rebuttal
[13:58] to whatever it is you just said.
[14:01] Okay, and go.
[14:03] I'm glad that Stu brought up both Cujo and Lost Highway,
[14:07] because while Dee Wallace was protecting her child
[14:12] from within a car,
[14:14] do you want a mother who's gonna get you lost
[14:16] on the highway?
[14:17] Possibly you're on your way to Disney World.
[14:20] It's delaying, by the time you get there,
[14:23] there's no time for any of the good rides.
[14:26] You're just gonna have to get on, I don't know,
[14:28] the teacup one.
[14:29] And if you stand in line long enough,
[14:32] you'll probably get on It's a Small World.
[14:34] And that's enough to say.
[14:36] That's the end of your counter-rebuttal.
[14:38] I mean, it was strong, but I like the teacup ride.
[14:41] So unfortunately, that drags it a little bit.
[14:43] Sorry.
[14:44] Know your audience.
[14:46] Looking at the first round, our final scores,
[14:49] I'm gonna say that Dan is slightly in the lead.
[14:52] Dan has three points.
[14:54] Stuart has one point.
[14:57] Dan, I wish you would have had a higher score
[15:00] if you could have gotten Cujo in
[15:01] during that first statement.
[15:02] But unfortunately, it was just a little too late,
[15:04] so I'm not sure you've seen ET.
[15:06] But some of the other things you said really rang true.
[15:09] And I like the way you turned Lost Highway around.
[15:11] Stu, I love that you're opening on that argument.
[15:14] And then it kind of forgot what you were talking about.
[15:18] That's why you only got the one point.
[15:19] Okay, so now it's round two.
[15:23] Okay, round two.
[15:25] So this time, Stuart gets to choose his side.
[15:28] And this is a different kind of round.
[15:29] This is, again, still about moms.
[15:31] These are supportive moms.
[15:32] This is the candid Mars badass protector moms.
[15:37] These are the moms who are willing to hurt somebody
[15:40] to help their child.
[15:42] And in this case, you get to choose
[15:44] between Sarah Connor and the Queen Alien.
[15:48] Who are you gonna argue the case of as the best mom?
[15:52] Two James Cameron joints.
[15:57] I mean, I'm gonna do Sarah Connor.
[15:59] Okay, that's great.
[16:00] So Dan, you'll be arguing the case of the Queen Alien
[16:02] as a better mom than Sarah Connor.
[16:05] And Stuart, your first statement.
[16:08] You have one minute, starts now.
[16:10] Okay, so Sarah Connor started off as a waitress.
[16:13] So already she's got these great multitasking skills.
[16:17] She works real hard.
[16:18] She loves her kid.
[16:19] And then she doesn't have a kid yet
[16:21] because all of a sudden this dude from the future
[16:23] named Michael Bean shows up and he puts a baby in her.
[16:26] It's like, what?
[16:28] That baby's gonna be the king of the future?
[16:31] And his name's gonna be John Connor,
[16:32] which I don't know if you know that.
[16:33] There was another guy named with a JC initial
[16:36] and he had some pretty wild ideas.
[16:42] Sarah Connor then lost her baby, made a bunch of friends,
[16:46] but then she got super fucking ripped for part two.
[16:50] I mean, what?
[16:52] Check out those shoulders and arms.
[16:53] It's nuts.
[16:54] And then she broke free.
[16:56] And you know, things were a little bit rocky at first,
[16:58] but they got along great.
[16:59] And you know what?
[17:00] They beat a T-1000.
[17:01] So thumbs up to Sarah Connor.
[17:05] Some additional elements about Sarah Connor is that she-
[17:09] I'm sorry, that's all the time you have.
[17:11] I apologize.
[17:12] You've run out of time.
[17:13] I do wanna hear those,
[17:14] so save them for your counter bubble maybe.
[17:16] I'm really disappointed you didn't start with,
[17:18] what is time since it's a time travel movie,
[17:21] but you're doing great.
[17:23] You're doing great.
[17:24] A lot of plot summary in there, but that's good.
[17:26] That's fine.
[17:27] Dan, okay, now it's your turn.
[17:29] You have one minute to tell me,
[17:30] why is the queen alien a better mom than Sarah Connor?
[17:34] And go.
[17:35] First off, is there a measure of a mother
[17:40] better than, of course, quantity of offspring?
[17:44] Size of brood.
[17:50] And boy, does the queen alien have it
[17:54] when it comes to number of children
[17:57] compared to Sarah Connor,
[17:58] only managed the one before Kyle Reese was killed.
[18:02] Number two, it's an alien.
[18:08] People say the xenomorphs are loveless creatures,
[18:13] but this alien was willing, as an act of revenge,
[18:17] to hitch a ride on a spaceship up into space
[18:21] and attack Ripley and murder a bystanding android,
[18:26] a synthetic, as they prefer to be called, if I recall.
[18:31] Very tolerant, I appreciate that.
[18:34] And that's your minute.
[18:36] That's your minute.
[18:36] Oh, thank you.
[18:37] You made a compelling argument,
[18:40] a compelling, somewhat insulting to most mothers
[18:43] who aren't the queen alien argument.
[18:45] Stuart, you now have 30 seconds to rebut Dan's rebuttal.
[18:49] This is a re-rebut,
[18:51] and give me the Sarah Connor argument, go.
[18:55] You say size of brood.
[18:57] Well, what if we were talking about
[19:00] the mother of all of humanity?
[19:02] Because that's what she gives the future
[19:04] by birthing John Connor.
[19:06] A boy who she raised, troubled teen,
[19:09] but she gave him the life skills he needs
[19:12] to teach a robot how to say cool-ass shit
[19:14] and give a thumbs up.
[19:17] Does the queen alien teach anybody anything?
[19:20] No, all she does is scream,
[19:22] shoot out her little tongue mouth,
[19:24] and then get killed.
[19:26] Sarah Connor, not killed.
[19:29] Okay, good, I'm glad you finished that thought.
[19:31] I'll let you finish that thought.
[19:33] Guys, another great round, I gotta say.
[19:36] So tallying up the scores now at the end of that round,
[19:39] Stuart actually has a, oh no, I'm sorry.
[19:43] It's tied up.
[19:44] It's tied up is what I meant to say.
[19:46] Stuart doesn't have a lead.
[19:47] It's tied up though.
[19:49] Sorry, I was doing the scores as I was talking.
[19:51] But that's, hey, it's a tie game.
[19:54] It's literally anyone's game.
[19:55] And we've got another round
[19:56] before we take a commercial break.
[19:57] This next round, Dan gets to.
[20:00] choose who he's going to argue first, which, oh, good thing, because this is right up Dan's
[20:05] alley. It's the sexy moms category. Sexy moms of the movies. Dan, will you argue the case
[20:10] of Morticia Adams from the Adams family films, or Leah Thompson in Back to the Future? Morticia
[20:16] Adams can't keep her hands off her husband. Leah Thompson can't keep her hands off her
[20:19] son. Which, who are you going to argue as the better mom?
[20:26] I'm going to argue for Leah Thompson. I'm not surprised at all. Stuart, you'll be arguing
[20:32] in favor of Morticia Adams. Dan, your opening statement, you have one minute again, starts
[20:36] now. Look, you all know me. I'm pervazoid number
[20:41] one. I'm an innocent pervazoid. I'm not going to cause you any trouble, but I'm your friend
[20:48] on the other side of these headphones, who is not afraid to say kind of gross things.
[20:57] I'm going to tell you, a lot of people seem to enjoy your taboo porn. Back to the Future
[21:07] was way out of the curve when it came to slamming that into the mainstream. You want to cover
[21:16] all elements of this great... What am I doing, guys? I don't even...
[21:26] You haven't said much about her as a mother. She's pretty good once the past gets fixed.
[21:36] Early on, she seems kind of beaten down by life. I don't think that's her fault. Her
[21:41] husband is a layabout. Dan, that's your minute. What a mess of an argument. Stuart, you're
[21:48] going to have to try hard not to win this one. God, on me. I have to admit, Dan, you
[21:56] did kind of walk into the guillotine I set up for you there. Thank you for being true
[22:01] to form. Stuart, let's... You have one minute. It sounds like you're already revving up.
[22:09] Tell me about Morticia Adams. Why is she the better of the two sexy moms? Well, she's always
[22:14] like lounging around and stuff, and yet at the same time, she gives her kids plenty of
[22:19] space to learn and be children and do their own fucking thing, right? She and Gomez are
[22:27] always dancing, catching roses and teeth. There's always close-ups on her eyes that
[22:32] are lit very well. Yeah, she's really great. And, you know, I don't know, like, you know,
[22:44] right? You know what I mean, right? Come on. You might need more specifics in this argument.
[22:54] No, no, wait a minute. But, you know, it's like, you know, right? You still have ten more seconds. Okay. I'm trying to run out the clock. In conclusion, you know, right? Okay, that is your rebuttal. I said you're going to have to work hard, and you did, so... I think I'm going to win this one on redirect, because here's what I've got to say.
[23:23] Okay, and go. Well, you know, my learned colleague's argument, the last half of it was just basically kind of a retread of his wait-what-come-on bit, which is a classic bit, but it has little salience on the matter. And also, are we to believe, like, half of his arguments are just describing the films that these characters appear in. Like, is the mark of a great mother that she has in her eyes lit really well? I don't know, not in real life.
[23:53] I mean, obviously also not in real life. One shouldn't go back and pass.
[23:57] Abort. Abort.
[23:58] No, no, wait. Hold on.
[23:59] Okay, and that's your time. So you really went after his argument. You didn't really back up your thoughts about the future, but that's okay. It's debate.
[24:10] Sometimes debate is about tearing down your opponent.
[24:13] So that round did not go the way I thought it would in a lot of ways. But tallying up the points, Dan takes a slight lead. We are now at 6-5, Dan, in terms of points.
[24:27] That's a surprise.
[24:28] Stuart lost a lot of points, but he just kind of stopped arguing to do a bit.
[24:34] You know what? Worth it.
[24:38] Yeah, I can see that your debate engines are overheating and there's steam coming out.
[24:43] So why don't we take a break for a short sponsor moment. Dan, who's our sponsor on this special episode of The Flop House?
[24:50] I don't know whether they want to be associated with this particular episode, but our sponsor is Kitty Poo Club.
[24:58] Now, look, I'm a cat person. Many folks may have seen that I have two cats or the household has two cats, Audrey and I, Archie and Panda.
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[25:58] I said it before. I'll say it again. You know, like I don't have kids around.
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[26:41] That's kittypooclub.com. That's in the copy, but it makes it sound like we're threatening Kitty Poo Club.
[26:48] The Flophouse sent ya! Bam! Pow! Bam!
[26:53] Hey, it's me, Colin Farrell, the penguin. Tell them the Flophouse sent ya's.
[27:01] That's my The Penguin as played by Colin Farrell impression.
[27:05] That's a good impression. That's a great impression.
[27:07] Hey, news guys, it's me, the penguin.
[27:12] Chicago!
[27:15] I gotta say, I just love the way that Colin Farrell made up his mind that he was like,
[27:23] I don't care how short the scene is in, if I'm gonna have to put on all this fucking shit, I'm gonna make the most out of any line.
[27:32] He was having fun in that movie.
[27:34] You gotta have fun. When you're in a Batman movie, why not have fun?
[27:37] You're in a movie about a guy who dresses like a bat and beats the crap out of people.
[27:40] So, have some fun.
[27:42] Yeah, have some fun.
[27:45] Thank you so much to everyone who participated in this year's MaxFunDrive.
[27:51] If you're a member who wants to purchase additional patches, our annual shop is now live.
[27:56] The proceeds for this year's sale will be going to Trans Lifeline.
[27:59] Anytime is a good time to donate to Trans Lifeline, but this year it feels particularly important.
[28:05] Trans Lifeline is a non-profit for the trans community by the trans community.
[28:10] We're grateful that with your support, we'll be able to help Trans Lifeline connect trans folks to the support and resources they need to survive and thrive.
[28:18] The sale will run until Friday, May 20th.
[28:21] Folks at the $10 monthly level and above will have access to all of the patches from the drive.
[28:27] We also have a special network patch starring Nutsy that all members can purchase.
[28:32] For more information on Trans Lifeline, visit translifeline.org.
[28:37] And for more information on the patches, head to maximumfun.org slash patch sale.
[28:44] Hey, this is Alden Ford.
[28:46] And Mujan Zolfagari.
[28:47] And we are here with all the other creators of Mission to Zix.
[28:50] Hello.
[28:51] You're not going to say our names, too?
[28:53] No, no, it's a short promo.
[28:54] Yeah.
[28:55] Now, with the end of our fifth and final season just a few weeks away, we want to say thank you to Maximum Fun and to every single one of you who's listened to and supported Mission to Zix.
[29:05] Thank you.
[29:06] And if you haven't checked it out, well, Mission to Zix is an improvised space opera with blockbuster-quality sound design, a score performed by an actual 60-piece orchestra, and hilarious guest comedians on every episode.
[29:18] And as our final episodes air, now is the perfect time to jump on board.
[29:23] That's Mission to Zix.
[29:25] Z-Y-X-X on Maximum Fun.
[29:29] Hey, speaking of fun, it's time to get back to our game.
[29:32] That's right, it's time.
[29:33] The second half of Mansplain, Mom vs. Mom, Mother's Day, belated edition.
[29:37] Perfect.
[29:38] And first, before we get to the next round of the debate, I wanted to have a little bonus round and ask each of you a question you can get extra points for.
[29:47] That's right, three P's because those stand for points, points, points.
[29:52] So here's my question.
[29:54] Stu, you can go first, although you are also going to get to choose during the next category.
[29:58] Stu?
[30:00] What is the plot of the movie about your mom and Dan think about it because the same questions gonna be coming right to you
[30:06] When Stu is finished, what is the plot of the movie about your mom your mom? What if you were making a movie about your mom?
[30:12] What's the plot? Okay
[30:15] It would be
[30:19] I mean
[30:21] it would probably be some kind of a like a like a like a heist movie where
[30:28] She and a bunch of
[30:30] you know like a team of
[30:32] experts in their own fields have to come together and
[30:37] Steal a big old bag full of money. That's in a bank vault
[30:42] And what's what's her expertise in this movie
[30:46] Well, she was an English teacher
[30:49] so she likes word all so
[30:54] Maybe that can be maybe she's like a like a like a
[30:58] like a
[31:00] cryptomancer or something you can like figure out a
[31:03] puzzle
[31:04] Maybe the lock is a word-based lock rather than a number-based lock. Yeah, that's what I meant. That's what I said
[31:11] Sure, and what's the title of the movie?
[31:13] Um
[31:20] Shelly's big day
[31:29] Brings a certain tone to it. That's not like a cracker Jack
[31:32] You know
[31:38] It is a big day for the 1960s like swinging London, yeah, I can see that be called
[31:46] And so so Dan you've had some time to think what's the plot of the movie about your mom I think it would be sort
[31:52] of a
[31:53] my you know, my mother was
[31:56] Will is
[31:58] Still living but she was when she was still
[32:01] Working a librarian she's retired now
[32:04] she was a public librarian and then a librarian for the college in my hometown and
[32:11] You know, I think it would be kind of I mean like this kind of exists right the librarian
[32:16] series of
[32:19] Franchise but it's basically just an Indiana Jones type thing. Well, that's what I was gonna be like
[32:23] National treasure, but it's with like library stuff. But then I'm like, well, that's the librarian movies, which
[32:30] But like, you know, she's kind of a small
[32:36] Unassuming lady who like maybe it's more like at the end of a phantom at the end of
[32:44] Describe Yoda as
[32:47] He's assuming until he starts whipping around and doing flips and
[32:52] Good miss Marple style hero like kind of a cross
[32:57] Pollination of like an Indiana Jones style thing, but with like a miss Marple style
[33:02] Mystery solver at the center at the core. Okay, and what's the title?
[33:12] The the the books a tryst
[33:18] I love it. That's great
[33:20] Yeah, that sounds good
[33:22] Now, of course my and just to answer the question for me
[33:24] My mom is also a librarian, but in my movie she can change to take the form of a rabbit
[33:29] And it's called lady rabbit super spy. So she's a spy in the form of rabbit
[33:33] The thing is being a rabbit is a lot makes it more difficult to be a spy
[33:37] So it's actually she has to overcome just kind of spying disguise. You would say it's like how
[33:42] vernacular despite being a
[33:45] Vampire, it doesn't have that good of a time because it's also a bunny. Yeah, exactly very much
[33:50] So so I'm gonna give each of you two bonus points for that. You guys did great. That was fantastic
[33:54] Now it's time to the next. How many did you give yourself as the host? I gave myself 10,000 points
[34:01] Way in the lead, but right now so the scores are now Dan eight stew seven. We're very close and we've got neck and neck
[34:07] Yeah, we've got at least two more rounds of debate. I'll let you. Okay wonder how many there are
[34:13] So still you're gonna choose on this one this next category. This is a little it's a sensitive topic
[34:18] This is the category moms who died during the movie and
[34:22] Stu you're going to choose who's the better mom? Shami Skywalker or
[34:27] Bambi's mom and you get to choose which one you're gonna argue in favor of
[34:35] I'm good. Of course. Yeah, I I gotta I gotta argue for Shami
[34:40] Okay, Shami Skywalker mother of Darth Vader and Dan so you'll be arguing the case of Bambi's mom mom of Bambi the deer
[34:47] One
[34:49] One of course the the maybe the most evil man in the galaxy or second most evil man in the galaxy and the other
[34:55] Deer, so, okay Stewart. You have one minute to argue the case of Shami Skywalker is a better mom than Bambi and you begin now
[35:02] balance
[35:05] Balance is what the galaxy needs and Shami provides by squirting out Anakin Skywalker
[35:13] losing points for that
[35:17] Anakin Shami a single mother raised Anakin
[35:24] Despite points. Yeah having to deal with wado always bust in their chops
[35:30] she helped she gave him enough space and
[35:35] Emotional support that he became
[35:38] the best podracer in the Boonta Eve classic
[35:44] and
[35:45] He then was able to blow up a droid spaceship command ship using those same skills
[35:52] She let him go and train. She gave him the space to do that
[35:56] She got remarried and then killed by some Tusken Raiders
[35:59] but you know what even that helped her son along his path to do what he needed to do, which is
[36:06] cause balance in the force
[36:09] Okay, that's that's a great opening statement. You went a little over in a couple seconds, but that's fine
[36:13] Dan you have your minute now. I might let you go a little over to just for equal time
[36:17] Can you explain why Bambi's mom is actually the better mom of the two moms? So wait and begin
[36:24] What is one good mark of parenthood? It's being there for your child now
[36:31] Bambi's mom you may remember her as dying very early
[36:35] But I want to tell you as someone who watched Bambi recently
[36:38] She does not die until the second half of the film you are misremembering Bambi
[36:44] She is around a surprise. I don't like the attack on the on the on the moderator. I didn't make
[36:50] Whereas Smee
[36:52] Smee Smee was she was she around enough?
[36:56] Do you if I were to ask?
[36:59] 100 people to name 100 Star Wars characters. None of them would come up with her name
[37:07] Whereas everyone feels the void left by Bambi's mom who was around a
[37:13] surprisingly long time before she got shot by a hunter and that's like
[37:18] All right. No, that's you got extra time. Oh, no. I'm sorry. I was reading your face wrong
[37:24] I thought you were your face said
[37:26] Wrap it up. No, no, I received I received a text about work
[37:36] Saying don't let him in this
[37:40] Hey
[37:42] That was a
[37:43] Dan that was a strong rebuttal coming on you getting a good second wind, but Stuart this is your rebut rebuttal
[37:49] Tell me why is Dan wrong? Why is she me Skywalker better?
[37:54] So in the public memory, I don't disagree that the
[37:58] Average person might not know the name of Smee Skywalker, though
[38:03] I'm sure they would recount that Anakin did have a mother
[38:08] Now more people will know that yes Bambi's mom existed and died but
[38:15] Tell me one person who knows Bambi's mom's name
[38:20] I'd if that person exists and wants to write in just send it to Dan McCoy care of the flop
[38:28] And that's your rebuttal that was very well said very well spoken
[38:33] And I think we're gonna be surprised by the results of this one. I'm gonna I'm actually gonna let's see
[38:41] It's a it's still a close. It's still a close game. But right now
[38:46] Let's see, hold on one second. Hmm. It's so good looking up Bambi's mom to see if she did had a name
[38:54] If you if you get look it up if she had if you can produce someone who knows that produce them now but guys
[39:00] Stu you've tied it up. It's not ten to ten. That's what it is. It is the level playing field once again
[39:06] Unfortunately, Dan has a big
[39:08] Advantage in this next round because he gets to choose who he's going to argue the case of that's right this next category
[39:15] It's scared horror movie mom moms in horror movies or otherwise scary movies that are scared and are scared of things in the movie
[39:23] Dan will you be arguing the case of Shelly Duvall in The Shining?
[39:27] Or Tilda Swinton and we need to talk about Kevin
[39:30] Who would you say is a better mom choose wisely because you'll have to make the case. I'm going to choose
[39:36] Shelly Duvall
[39:38] Okay
[39:40] Spaces I can't tell if he was dreading that outcome or or okay with it
[39:45] So Stuart you'll be arguing the case of Tilda Swinton. Okay, talk about Kevin sure battle
[39:49] Very much an uphill battle, but being a mom is stressful
[39:53] so Dan your opening statement about the
[39:56] betterness of Shelly Duvall in The Shining begins now and you
[40:00] minute. I will quickly state that everything I have said in this show is
[40:05] facetious to some degree or another before saying Shelley Duvall was able to
[40:12] protect her child from a danger whereas Tilda Swinton's child was the danger. Now
[40:18] is that Tilda Swinton's fault? One could argue one way or another. That is not
[40:24] this debate's purview. The purview is which is the better mom and considering
[40:33] that Shelley Duvall saves her child from her axe-wielding husband whereas
[40:40] everyone seems to die otherwise in the other situation, I'm going to go with
[40:47] Ms. Duvall and her marvelous winter sweaters. Okay and you have a couple extra
[40:55] seconds that's but you're done? I've got so much confidence in the efficacy of
[41:00] this argument that I can afford to burn seconds. Wow that's that confidence I
[41:06] might be insulted by it but I also might admire it so you know that's a that's a
[41:10] dangerous gambit but Stuart now it's your turn you have one minute to turn
[41:13] the tables on Dan and explain why Tilda Swinton and we need to talk about Kevin
[41:18] is the better mom and your minute starts now. Perseverance, enduring love, these are
[41:28] the qualities of the of the best mom. Tilda Swinton and we need to talk about
[41:33] Kevin despite all of her their their history whether it's crossbow related or
[41:40] other things still loves her child and still makes an effort to find some kind
[41:48] of connection with him even while he's in prison and to me that is a moment of
[41:57] pure perfect motherly love that even when times are tough she still finds
[42:10] room in her heart for her son who is probably somewhere in Hawaii beating
[42:14] people up right now. Very topical Stuart that was a great argument Dan now it's
[42:22] time for your third part this is 30 seconds tell me why Stuart's wrong and
[42:27] why you are still right that Shelley Duvall is the best of these two horror
[42:31] movie moms. Shelley Duvall in addition to being windy of course in the Shining
[42:39] had fairy tale theater now are they the same person people can argue this
[42:47] scientists have not been able to come to consensus but what could be better as a
[42:53] mom than to have your own fairy tale theater where all of the great folktales
[43:00] come to life before your eyes for your amusement and edification as a child
[43:07] strong argument strong argument tallying up the points though I've got
[43:11] to say Stuart really knocked it out of the park the the true test of a mother
[43:16] is to maintain love for their child regardless what happens with the child
[43:20] that was an excellent argument excellent gambit by all outward signs Shelley
[43:25] Duvall is a much better mother in that she saves a child rather than creating a
[43:30] monster but you know the true measure of a mom is whether she still loves her
[43:34] monster so Stuart takes the lead is now 14 to 13 Stuart in the lead but only by
[43:41] one point and hold on a second did you just hear that didgeridoo sound effect
[43:46] Alex put in a didgeridoo sound effect there
[43:53] Wow did you just hear that didgeridoo sound effect I just did yeah yeah that
[43:58] means it's time for scared horror movie mom Australian edition that's right so
[44:04] Stuart you get to choose and this is actually gonna be our final debate okay
[44:08] fine final main debate we will have a bonus round right afterwards our final
[44:11] main debate Stuart will you choose to are you the case of Tony Collette in
[44:15] hereditary or SC Davis in the Babadook who is the better mom Tony Collette in
[44:21] the hereditary SC Davis in the Babadook again this is scared horror movie mom
[44:25] Australian edition who will you take the side of oh man I gotta go with Tony
[44:32] Collette in hereditary okay so Dan you'll be arguing the case that SC Davis
[44:37] in the Babadook is the better mom but not till Stuart has made his opening
[44:41] statement Stuart tell me why Tony Collette in hereditary is the better mom
[44:45] starting now you have one minute I mean look where she comes from her mother was
[44:51] a Paimon worshipping cultist who set all the dominoes up that eventually fall
[44:58] and then we are left with this kid being you know with a demon inside him and his
[45:03] little sister's heads been knocked off and it's gross now what I will say is a
[45:11] true test of a mother is the ability to fly around and climb on walls and cling
[45:14] on things and set Gabriel burn on fire and you can't tell me otherwise she can
[45:18] fly she can do it all she can cut off her own head and you know what that
[45:21] doesn't stop her she's still a mom baby
[45:25] is that the full are you you have like 20 seconds oh man I'm only gonna mess it
[45:30] up if I keep talking okay well then that's I guess we'll prematurely end
[45:35] that I'll see maybe I can tack that on to your rebuttal to dance I admire you
[45:40] the confidence of you guys just burning time at the end so Dan it's your turn
[45:43] you heard his argument you don't leave anything on the table there's a final
[45:48] there's a bonus round after this but you don't have to worry about it too
[45:50] much so tell me why is se Davis in the Babadook a better mom than Tony Clett in
[45:54] hereditary you know motherhood is both a real and vital thing and it is a greater
[46:01] metaphor that we that we love in society and so let's look at these movies on the
[46:07] metaphorical level hereditary the message is telling us is that evil is
[46:14] somehow endemic to a certain family that it gets passed on along through the
[46:20] generations this is a message that we want whereas the Babadook tells us that
[46:25] even though love is difficult and stressful and that we may encounter dark
[46:31] emotional times the only way we can live is to make friends with our dark
[46:37] emotions which is a far better emotional lesson to be drawn than some sort of
[46:44] some sort of bloodline curse and in conclusion the Babadook of course is an
[46:54] icon to us all okay I mean it's a strong argument in favor of the movie you
[47:00] didn't really you failed to tell me much about the mom but uh you know what
[47:04] no but I'll give you a point for for some of that stuff so Stuart now you can
[47:08] rebut that rebuttal tell me why is why is Dan wrong why is Tony Collette the
[47:14] better mom you've you've already enumerated her
[47:17] superpowers which is pretty impressive but what else what else is there about
[47:21] it you have 30 seconds okay we're just gonna talk about sheer difficulty here
[47:27] because S.E. Davis has one super annoying kid that she has to try and keep control
[47:33] over Tony Collette has two she's got one kid that won't stop eating nuts like
[47:38] quit it what are you doing that you're allergic and then you have another kid
[47:42] who keeps smashing his head on desks freaking out because he's got a demon in
[47:46] him that's two kids that's double the number of difficult kids the math works
[47:54] out the math checks out on that one oh yeah and okay so we've got I think I
[47:59] know my scores on that one but before we go to the final scores before I
[48:03] reveal them it's time for another final bonus round that's right everybody
[48:08] we've talked a lot about moms now it's talked about talk about what is the
[48:12] definition of a mom so this I want you to debate real quick this is a lightning
[48:16] round debate where I just want you guys to spit out your arguments real fast to
[48:19] each other and you can go multiple rounds you don't have to worry about the
[48:22] time but cheese keep it short to like a couple sentences each just pass it back
[48:26] and forth here is the final bonus round mr. mom honorary mom now I flipped a
[48:33] coin Dan taking the pro position yes he is a mom and Stuart taking the con
[48:38] position no mr. mom so resolved mr. mom is a mom Dan taking pro and Stu taking
[48:44] con and Dan I'll you'll go first because your box is above Stu's on my screen
[48:52] since ginger is a construct and mom is a word for a nurturer who is the the
[49:01] better nurturer than Michael Keaton America's Wildman you know figuring out
[49:09] how to change a diaper doing some sort of shenanigans probably it's been a long
[49:15] time since I've seen mr. mom it may seem like it's a you know outdated you know
[49:21] gender stereotypes is what's playing on and it is but it's flipping them it's
[49:25] flipping them in the name of moving forward and showing that we all can be
[49:30] nurturers including mr. mom okay Stu take what tell him why he's wrong why
[49:34] is mr. mom not a mom he's not a mom because he is so much more he is the
[49:42] alpha he is the Omega he's the beginning of the story he's the end of the story
[49:47] he is everything all at once he is the child he is the parent he is the
[49:52] grandparent he is the son creating life he is more than a mom
[50:00] Dan, tell him, you each get one more round, Dan, bro, I mean, you both kind of said that
[50:05] he is a mom, but Dan, so tell me, are you against Stu?
[50:10] I guess if he's just a mom, is what you're arguing, and not the all things.
[50:13] Checkmate, if something is all things, then it is also a mom, and Stuart has already admitted
[50:20] that Michael Keaton in Mr. Mom is everything, and thus, I mean, he's a multiplicity, if
[50:27] you will.
[50:28] A good mom, a bad mom, a mom that doesn't know what the name of the other moms are,
[50:36] you know, read the paper this morning, you know, see the stories about the Birdman and
[50:43] the Batman.
[50:44] Keep tying in, give me more Michael Keaton titles, I love it, I heard Spotlight, that
[50:51] was good, throw some more in.
[50:53] Make a little Beetlejuice, and Dunghoe, you know, because Batman returns, guys, he leaves,
[51:03] but he comes back, just like a mom.
[51:07] Okay, Stu, do you have any more Michael Keaton titles that Dan didn't mention that you want
[51:12] to get out there?
[51:13] In addition to being a creator, Michael Keaton is also a destroyer, and I ask you this, can
[51:18] a mom truly be a destroyer?
[51:20] I don't think so.
[51:21] He has created a home, he destroys the home, when the washing machine goes crazy, it becomes
[51:30] a money pit.
[51:31] Wait, was he in Money Pit?
[51:33] No, that's Tom Hanks, it's a Tom Hanks movie, alright, so that's the end of that bonus round,
[51:39] well Dan got that point, which means, guys, you're gonna get mad at me, it's a tie, 16
[51:46] points to 16 points, you both, you have totally tied, you are equally amazing debaters, master
[51:52] debaters, if you will, and I just, I hope everyone listening can salute these two master
[51:57] debaters who have showed us such a wonderful, wonderful example of master debating tonight.
[52:04] The saddest thing is that I didn't think of it until just now, because I would have tied
[52:09] it in earlier.
[52:10] Yeah, you know, I am, this is the best of all possible outcomes, I share the victory
[52:17] and the defeat with my friend Stuart.
[52:19] The best outcome would be Dan, my greatest hater, defeating me, so I then grind harder
[52:25] and better, so I become the best debater in all the land.
[52:28] Oh yeah.
[52:29] Well, keep working at it, because I've got a feeling that Mansplain, the game of Mansplaining
[52:34] debate between two men, you guys, will return at some later date, should I think of a theme
[52:40] for it.
[52:42] Thank you so much for joining us, so Dan and Stuart, you've shared the joy, the pride,
[52:46] the shame, and the glory of being debaters tonight, and I want to thank you, listening
[52:52] to this at home or wherever you are, open your eyes now, it's no longer night, the bright
[52:56] sun, the bright light of a sunshiny day is shining through the windows, and now you've
[53:02] been reinvigorated by this burst of intellectual combat, this analytical post and reposting,
[53:12] this war of cerebellums that we've heard tonight, but it's not night where you are, now it's
[53:17] day, heard today, and with that behind us, motivating us, how can we not make it through
[53:25] the fog of the modern into the promise of tomorrow?
[53:29] Drive into the garage, just pull the car up and park it.
[53:35] And so I want to thank you for listening, I want to thank the Maximum Fun Network, to
[53:38] which we are a member of, please listen to other Maximum Fun shows, they have a lot of
[53:41] very good ones, I'd like to thank our producer and editor, Alex, Dan, what's his, how do
[53:47] you spell his handle, HowlDotty?
[53:50] HowlDotty, it's H-O, and the word well, and dotty is D-A-W-D-Y, I believe, oh wait, there
[54:01] might be another W in there.
[54:02] It's good enough, it's good enough, they'll figure it out, thank you Alex, I hope you
[54:07] put that didgeridoo sound in earlier when I asked you to, I want to thank Dan and Stuart
[54:10] for being my contestants, you can find us online at the Flophouse Pod on Twitter, and
[54:18] I guess there's a Facebook group and stuff, and there's, Dan, what's our website?
[54:22] It's FlophousePodcast.com.
[54:24] Please join us next week as we will be talking about a movie, and then the week after that
[54:28] as we have another mini, and the week after that as we have another movie, ad infinitum,
[54:32] until the end of the universe, and the big crunch, when the big bang reverses, and everything
[54:36] goes back into being a tiny particle, thank you very much, I've been Elliot Kalin, I've
[54:40] been Dan McCoy, and I'm still Stuart Wellington, saying good debating to you, that's what he
[54:49] said, I don't know about that, that's the irony of it, yeah, don't you think, oh Alanis,
[55:00] call her up, talking about Canadians, she's the new Guinness Book of Records, she's the
[55:06] Guinness Book of Ironic Records, Guinness Book of Ironic, Alanis's Guinness Book of
[55:10] Ironic Records, Alanis Alanis, that's the Latin name for it, is Alanis Alanis, it's
[55:16] an ancient tome about what is and what is not ironic, let me crack open my copy of the
[55:23] Alanis Alanis, and I open it up, and ghosts float out saying spoons, thousand forks, rain
[55:28] on wedding day, blow this ironic dust off of here, the Alana Mamakon, the Alana Mamakon
[55:38] tells you what things to put in your hand when the other one is in your pocket, so that
[55:42] you can summon demons, Klaatu Alanis Niktu, this ironic thing is that you shouldn't ought
[55:50] to know, these dark secrets, MaximumFun.org, comedy and culture, artist owned, audience
[55:59] supported.

Description

Elliott surprises Dan and Stu with a series of impromptu debate prompts, forcing his co-hosts to argue for the cinema mothers they'd most like to have as moms.

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