FH Mini 62- The Long-Awaited Wedding Episode

[0:00] Hello, everyone. Welcome to another Flophouse Mini.

Elliott Kalan

[0:08] Now, Flophouse fans know that normally we on the Flophouse watch a bad movie and then we talk about it.

[0:13] True.

[0:14] We do that on alternate weeks.

[0:15] On the other weeks, we do Flophouse Minis.

[0:19] And these are just us doing whatever we want, which has mostly fallen to us taking turns running the other two through games that we've invented.

[0:27] That alternately annoy and terrify them.

[0:31] So, to introduce myself, Flophouse listeners, I will be your captain for this evening.

[0:36] Or should I say the master of ceremonies, as we'll find out soon enough.

[0:41] My name is Elliot Kalin.

[0:43] We're playing Apocalypse World?

[0:44] Yep, when we're playing Apocalypse World, which we're living in right now.

[0:48] We're all playing that.

[0:49] So, my name is Elliot Kalin and joining me are...

Dan McCoy

[0:52] I will be your host, your ghost host.

[0:56] But you're not the host.

[0:57] I'm the host tonight.

[0:58] But what's your name, Dan?

[0:59] I just wanted to say the Haunted Mansion thing.

[1:02] I'm Dan McCoy.

[1:04] And Stuart Ghost Host.

Stuart Wellington

[1:06] And I'm the bit master.

[1:09] Master of bits.

[1:10] Doing bits all the time, dudes.

[1:13] Stuart Wellington.

[1:14] I was worried you were going to...

Elliott Kalan

[1:15] The bit was that you were never going to get around to your name.

[1:18] Yeah.

[1:19] That's a good bit.

[1:20] The first time listeners are like, yeah, I liked it.

[1:22] There are these three hosts, Elliot Kalin, Dan McCoy, and Bit Master.

[1:27] His first name is Bit.

[1:28] His last name is Master.

[1:30] Anyway, yeah, he runs the Hyperzone.

[1:32] So, everybody, Dan, Stu, it's great to see you guys.

[1:36] I haven't seen you in a little bit.

[1:37] Thank you.

[1:38] Since we recorded our last episode.

[1:40] You're welcome.

[1:40] Fans, it's great to see you again.

[1:42] I can see you while you're listening to this.

[1:44] So, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

[1:46] Today, we're going to play a very special game.

[1:49] That's right, everybody.

[1:50] It's a game episode, as I hinted at before.

[1:52] Now, we're recording this episode one day after my own wedding anniversary.

[1:57] The 12th anniversary of the day got married yesterday.

[2:00] Ask me where we went out for dinner.

[2:03] Where did you go out for dinner, Elliot?

Stuart Wellington

[2:05] What state are you in?

[2:07] I need, before I can make a guess, I need to know what state you're in.

[2:10] I'm in California, as far as I'm going, because I don't want to be doxxed.

Elliott Kalan

[2:14] He just asked to be set up to answer.

Dan McCoy

[2:17] He didn't ask for a guess.

Elliott Kalan

[2:18] Nope, nope.

[2:19] French Laundry would have been the other end of the state.

Dan McCoy

[2:22] I mean, I can guess, but he didn't ask for guesses.

Elliott Kalan

[2:23] Dan, give me one guess.

[2:24] I didn't ask for guesses, but give me one.

[2:25] Anyway, get in on the guessing game.

Dan McCoy

[2:29] California Pizza Kitchen.

[2:31] We just call it Pizza Kitchen out here.

[2:33] Out here, we just call it Pizza Kitchen.

Elliott Kalan

[2:34] An eponymous pizza kitchen.

[2:36] But no, I didn't get to go to any restaurants because my younger child had a cold.

[2:41] And so we had to cancel our plans to go to a fancy steakhouse.

[2:44] Instead, we took in some food at home.

[2:47] So anyway.

Stuart Wellington

[2:47] You got an advice.

[2:48] But there's something good comes out of this because now for the rest of your younger child's life,

[2:54] anytime he's about to celebrate any kind of thing, you can remind him of the time he ruined your anniversary.

[2:59] Exactly.

Elliott Kalan

[3:00] Exactly.

[3:00] It'll be much like the time that he got sick on Valentine's Day and we had to cancel those plans.

[3:05] I guess what I'm saying is I'm worried about my son's health.

[3:07] And that's what we're going to talk about today.

[3:08] Okay.

[3:09] Child health, pediatrics.

[3:10] Now, Dan, you went to school to be a pediatrician, but you dropped out like two years in.

[3:15] What did you learn?

Dan McCoy

[3:16] Well, I thought it was podiatry is the thing.

[3:19] I thought it was about feet.

[3:21] And it took you two years.

[3:23] I guess I learned that, yeah, that pediatricians are not foot doctors.

[3:28] Okay.

[3:29] Contrary to popular belief by me.

Elliott Kalan

[3:31] You briefly became a spin doctor, which you thought was a person who repaired record players.

Dan McCoy

[3:35] Yeah, but instead I mostly was counting princes.

[3:40] There's one, two princes here before you.

[3:45] Oh, okay.

[3:46] That's what I said now.

Elliott Kalan

[3:46] How do princes feel about me?

[3:47] Do they like me or do they not like me?

[3:49] Oh, those are princes who adore you.

Dan McCoy

[3:51] That's what I said now.

[3:53] Did one of them bring me flowers?

Elliott Kalan

[3:55] Oh, boy.

[3:56] Did they?

[3:57] And what do I have a pocket full of, Dan?

[3:59] Kryptonite.

[4:00] Now, Little Miss.

[4:01] Which is very good.

[4:02] Now, is Little Miss always right?

Dan McCoy

[4:04] No.

[4:05] Well, I mean, I wouldn't say she's always right, but I will say she can't be wrong.

Elliott Kalan

[4:10] Okay, that's fair.

[4:11] And we've now reached the extent of the spin doctor songs that I'm aware of.

[4:15] So, in honor of my wedding anniversary, which was yesterday, again,

[4:18] we're going to be talking a little bit tonight about marriage and the movies in a three-round game that I'm calling

[4:25] Oh.

[4:25] The Flophouse in the Aisle, which would normally mean a movie theater aisle, but in this case,

[4:30] means the aisle between the pews at a traditional wedding.

[4:32] Or for short, this game is known as T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[4:41] For short.

[4:41] Perfect.

[4:41] If you want to call it by something a little snappier than the full name.

[4:43] Yeah, of course.

[4:44] Yeah.

[4:44] Which is, again, the Flophouse in the Aisle, which would normally mean a movie theater aisle,

[4:48] but in this case means the aisle between the pews at a traditional wedding.

[4:50] That's the full title.

[4:51] Couldn't be clearer.

[4:52] Let's now start this episode of T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[5:02] Alex, if you would put a little wedding organ music here to just transition to the game proper,

[5:05] that would be wonderful.

Stuart Wellington

[5:18] Should I start my recording?

Elliott Kalan

[5:22] Oh, dear.

[5:26] This is a good time to start that.

[5:29] Okay, and now that the wedding organ music

[5:32] has hopefully finished transitioning us into the game,

[5:34] after Stuart's puckish little prank,

[5:36] we'll start the game.

[5:39] Okay, everyone.

[5:40] Hello, and welcome to this episode

[5:41] of America's favorite wedding-based game,

[5:43] T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[5:50] And please welcome our contestant.

[5:53] That's right.

[5:53] Joining us from Brooklyn, New York, is Dan McCoy.

[5:56] Say hi, Dan.

[5:57] Hi, Dan.

[5:58] And what's a fun fact about you that listeners might want to know?

[6:01] I have two cats.

[6:05] Okay, that's a fun fact.

[6:06] And our other contestant is Stuart Wellington,

[6:12] also of Brooklyn, New York.

[6:14] Stuart, what's a fun fact about you?

[6:16] I ate a piece of steak tonight.

Stuart Wellington

[6:18] Okay.

[6:20] And you have two cats.

Elliott Kalan

[6:23] That's true.

Stuart Wellington

[6:24] If I have two cats, is that a fun fact?

Elliott Kalan

[6:26] I think, you know what, it's now a fun fact that both contestants have two cats.

[6:30] That's right, it's a four-cat game here on T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[6:38] We've never had a four-cat game before, and we're very excited about it.

[6:41] A first in T-F-H-I-T-A-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W history.

[6:49] So guys, now it's time for the first round of our game.

[6:51] I'm glad we got to meet our content.

Stuart Wellington

[6:52] Before we get into the game, earlier I had introduced myself as the Bitmaster.

[6:57] Can I please give that title to you now?

[7:00] Are you allowed?

[7:01] Because your commitment to this bit is legendary.

[7:04] Thank you.

Elliott Kalan

[7:05] Maybe later in the game.

[7:06] Maybe later in the game.

[7:06] We'll see if the bit continues or if I get tired of it too.

[7:09] I'll keep the cap upon my head, my worried brow.

[7:12] Oh, so heavy is the head that wears the Bitmaster cap.

[7:18] It's hard to sleep with it on.

[7:20] Okay, so that's part of the bit.

[7:21] So we're going to start with round one.

[7:24] And this round is entitled, With This Movie, I The Wed.

[7:28] Now, I'm going to name two actors, and you're going to tell me what movie they have a wedding or get married in.

[7:34] Okay?

[7:34] Okay.

[7:35] You're going to take turns doing that.

[7:36] I'm going to give you the names of the actors, not of the characters.

[7:39] And you're going to tell me what movie they get married in.

[7:42] I want to apologize beforehand at the lack of, let's say, diversity of types of relationship or types of people in this.

[7:49] Blame Hollywood.

[7:50] That is Hollywood's fault, not mine.

[7:52] We can only work with what we've been given by the movies here at TFH-IT-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[8:01] There's a faster way of saying this.

[8:03] There isn't.

[8:04] So this section is going to have 16 questions.

[8:06] You're each going to take turns.

[8:07] And are you going to ask me if you can steal?

[8:10] Can we steal?

[8:11] Yes, you can steal.

[8:12] Of course you can steal because marriage is all about stealing someone's heart and then holding it in a box and never giving it back.

[8:19] A heart-shaped box.

[8:20] A heart-shaped box.

[8:21] Well, I think that's just the heart.

[8:22] For just a week.

Dan McCoy

[8:23] You're only allowed to hold it in a heart-shaped box for a week.

[8:26] And then you've got to transfer it to…

Elliott Kalan

[8:28] Then you've got to take it up to a plateau.

[8:30] Yeah.

[8:30] And what's some other Nirvana songs?

Dan McCoy

[8:34] Well, yeah.

[8:35] What does that heart smell like?

[8:36] There's something in the way that you have to get past to take your box to the place.

[8:42] Smells like Teen Spirit.

[8:43] Sure.

[8:44] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[8:45] Okay.

[8:46] So…

[8:46] Yeah, go on.

Elliott Kalan

[8:47] So we're going to…

[8:48] Unplugged.

Dan McCoy

[8:49] You should come as you are to…

[8:51] Unplugged.

[8:52] Unplugged.

Elliott Kalan

[8:53] Okay, no, this is not actually part of the round.

[8:55] I shouldn't have brought it up in the first place.

[8:58] So, 16 questions.

[8:59] Again, this round is called,

[9:00] With this movie, I be wed.

[9:01] I give you the actors.

[9:02] You tell me what movie they get married in.

[9:05] Stuart, we're going to start with you

[9:06] because you have technically been married longer than Dan at this point in current relationships.

[9:12] Wow, technically.

[9:13] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[9:14] We're only counting one.

[9:15] One each.

Dan McCoy

[9:16] You're technically correct, which is the best kind of correct, as we promise.

Elliott Kalan

[9:21] So, Stu, here's your first one.

[9:23] And again, Dan, if he can't figure it out or if he gets it wrong, you can attempt to steal it.

[9:28] First question.

[9:29] Maya Rudolph and Tim Heidecker.

[9:32] Oh, Bridesmaids.

[9:34] Bridesmaids, the movie in which…

[9:35] I don't know if the cast knew that Tim Heidecker was playing the groom.

[9:38] He has no lines in the movie, and he just kind of shows up in the corner of the frame.

Stuart Wellington

[9:42] I just assumed it was his complicated alt-comedy routine he was doing.

[9:46] Exactly.

Elliott Kalan

[9:47] Okay, Dan, this next one is for you.

[9:49] Julia Roberts and Richard Gere.

[9:51] And what movie do they get married in?

[9:52] Is that Runaway Bride?

[9:54] I'll accept it.

[9:55] Technically, it's called The Runaway Bride, but let's not be pedantic here.

[9:58] Let's not.

[9:59] Okay.

[9:59] Stuart, number three is for you.

[10:01] Okay.

[10:02] Classic film.

[10:03] Everyone remembers it.

[10:04] Salma Hayek and Matthew Perry.

[10:05] And what movie do they tie the knot?

[10:08] Fools Rush In.

[10:09] You know it.

[10:11] Fools Rush In to the theater to see that movie.

[10:13] The confidence with which Stuart pointed at the screen.

[10:16] I knew that shit.

[10:18] Okay.

[10:19] This next one, Dan, let's see if you can be as confident as Stuart.

[10:22] Okay.

[10:22] Catherine Zeta-Jones and George Clooney.

[10:25] And what movie do they get married?

[10:27] Intolerable Cruelty.

[10:28] You're right.

[10:29] Also known as Intolerable Movie.

[10:31] Mm.

Dan McCoy

[10:32] Yeah.

[10:32] It's fine.

[10:33] It's just not.

[10:33] It's fine.

[10:34] It's just not one of the Coen Brothers' top films.

[10:37] No.

Stuart Wellington

[10:37] I like how quickly you abandoned your commitment to that burn.

Elliott Kalan

[10:40] Well, it's tough for that movie because if the Coen Brothers hadn't made it, it still

[10:44] wouldn't have been great.

[10:45] But I think people might have given it a little more credit.

[10:47] Yeah, yeah.

[10:47] But the Coen Brothers are masters.

[10:49] You know, they're not just bit masters, although they are masters of bits as well.

[10:52] Okay, Stuart.

[10:53] They're bass masters.

[10:54] They are bass masters.

[10:56] They're pretty good at catching fish and marrying them to each other.

[11:00] Mm-hmm.

[11:00] And okay, Stuart, here's your next one.

Stuart Wellington

[11:02] That's what that fucking video game is?

[11:04] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[11:05] Yeah, you have to marry the fish together.

[11:07] Yeah.

[11:08] It was originally called Bass Marrier, but it was confused because they thought people were

[11:11] saying, you marry the bass, like you marry a bass and live with it forever.

[11:14] No, that's not right.

[11:15] But no, no, you just perform marriage ceremonies between two fish.

[11:17] Okay.

[11:18] Okay, so speaking of two fish, here's a marriage between two people who are not fish, but they

[11:22] might be eating fish at the wedding.

[11:24] It's Talia Shire and Gianni Russo.

[11:27] Wait, is this for me?

[11:29] This is for you, Stuart.

[11:30] Fuck.

[11:31] I have no idea.

[11:33] Okay.

[11:33] Dan, any idea?

[11:34] Dan can steal this shit.

[11:35] Is that the godfather?

[11:38] It is the godfather.

[11:39] I didn't expect either of you to know that Gianni Russo was the husband, but Talia Shire

[11:43] was the giveaway.

[11:44] Yeah.

[11:44] I was ready with a clue, but you didn't need it.

[11:46] Okay.

[11:46] So Dan, now it's your turn.

[11:48] Wallace Shawn and Twink Kaplan.

Dan McCoy

[11:51] Sorry, Twink Kaplan?

[11:53] Yes.

[11:54] Okay.

[11:56] You know what?

[11:57] You got to trade it back.

[11:58] Don't know this one.

[12:01] Okay.

[12:02] Okay.

[12:03] Stuart.

Elliott Kalan

[12:03] My Dinner with Andre.

[12:05] No, there's no marriage in My Dinner with Andre.

[12:08] It's just the only characters in it are Wallace Shawn and Andre Gregory and the waiter.

[12:12] That was Clueless.

[12:13] That was the movie Clueless.

[12:14] Which ends with Wallace Shawn and Twink Kaplan getting married.

[12:17] I should have known that.

[12:19] But you're going to get this one because it's, whose turn is it?

[12:22] Stuart's turn now?

[12:22] Mine.

[12:23] Yeah.

[12:23] Okay.

[12:23] Chris Pang and Sonoya Mizuno.

Stuart Wellington

[12:30] God damn it.

[12:31] Big hit movie.

[12:33] I don't know.

[12:34] Dan, can you, you want to steal this one?

[12:37] Uh, nope.

[12:39] I don't.

Elliott Kalan

[12:40] Okay.

[12:41] It's Crazy Rich Asians.

[12:42] Crazy Rich Asians.

[12:43] Hit movie.

[12:44] I know you both were probably thinking it, but you didn't want to guess it because you

[12:47] thought you would seem racist.

[12:48] You wouldn't have.

[12:49] You would have seemed knowledgeable.

[12:51] Okay.

[12:51] Well, maybe this will take some of the sting out of it.

[12:54] I believe this is Dan's turn again.

[12:55] Dan, it's your turn.

[12:56] Yeah.

[12:56] Okay.

[12:56] How about this?

[12:57] John Lithgow and Alfred Molina.

Dan McCoy

[13:00] Uh, oh, what is that movie called?

[13:04] Uh.

[13:04] You have to tell me.

[13:06] Uh.

[13:07] What is it?

[13:08] Is it called?

[13:09] No.

[13:10] Uh.

[13:12] Uh.

[13:14] I can, I, I know it exists.

[13:16] I know the movie, but okay.

[13:19] Sure.

Elliott Kalan

[13:21] Say it again.

[13:22] Who is it again?

[13:23] John Lithgow.

[13:24] You may know him best from Raising Cane.

[13:25] And Alfred Molina, Dr. Octopus himself.

[13:28] Okay.

[13:28] So it's probably not Raising Cane.

[13:32] No.

[13:33] I mean, here's another hint.

[13:34] It's not Buckaroo Monsai either, in which he played Dr. Lizardo.

[13:39] Uh.

Stuart Wellington

[13:40] Oh, fuck.

[13:41] It's probably not Third Rock from the Sun.

[13:44] No, that was a TV show.

Dan McCoy

[13:47] Maybe it's the world of Courtney Garp, Stuart.

Stuart Wellington

[13:50] Who knows?

[13:51] Yeah, I know.

[13:52] You never know.

[13:53] Oh, fuck.

[13:54] Oh, man.

Dan McCoy

[13:55] Could be the stage version of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.

[13:58] I'm gonna, I'm gonna pass.

[14:00] Okay.

[14:01] The answer is Love is Strange.

Elliott Kalan

[14:02] That was a movie called Love is Strange.

[14:04] Oh.

[14:05] Okay.

[14:06] And guys, it's time for a mini category.

[14:09] It's this round.

[14:10] This game, again, is called With This Movie, I The Wed.

[14:12] Here's a mini category.

[14:13] It's called I Now Pronounce You Almost Man and Wife.

[14:16] These are movies in which a wedding is taken place, but is interrupted and does not get

[14:20] finished.

[14:21] The first question goes to Stuart, Michael Keaton, and Winona Ryder.

[14:26] In what movie do they almost get married?

Stuart Wellington

[14:33] Wait.

[14:34] Reality Bites.

[14:36] No.

[14:37] Dan, do you want to steal?

[14:38] That would be Beetlejuice.

Elliott Kalan

[14:41] Beetlejuice.

[14:43] There's even like a little ghost priest.

[14:45] He's a little tight guy.

[14:47] Don't worry, Stu.

[14:48] Don't worry, Stu.

[14:48] Maybe you'll steal this one from Dan if he doesn't get it.

[14:51] Probably not.

[14:55] Actually, hold on.

[14:57] Are you trying to find something tougher?

[14:59] No, no, no.

[15:00] I'm not going to.

[15:01] I briefly was going to, but I decided not to.

[15:04] Dan, how about this?

[15:06] In what movie do Chris Sarandon and Robin Wright almost get married?

[15:10] That would be The Princess Bride.

[15:13] The Princess Bride.

[15:14] Okay.

[15:14] That's the end of that mini round.

[15:16] Now it's back to the main game, which again is still called With This Movie, I Be Wed.

[15:21] Indistinguishable from the other game.

[15:23] It's a little indistinguishable.

[15:26] Okay.

[15:26] This one's for Stuart.

[15:27] So Stuart, this is Timothy Walker and Sarah Crowe, then David Haig and Sophie Thompson, then Andy McDowell and Corin Redgrave, and then Andy McDowell and Hugh Grant, I think.

[15:37] I've actually never seen the movie.

[15:40] What?

[15:41] Four Weddings and a Funeral?

[15:43] Four Weddings and a Funeral.

[15:44] Yes.

Dan McCoy

[15:44] Although at the end of four, you haven't seen it.

[15:47] They agree not to get married, Andy McDowell and Hugh Grant.

Elliott Kalan

[15:51] Well, I'm still going to give Stuart credit, and I'm going to dock myself a point.

[15:55] I've never seen the movie.

[15:56] Too many weddings, not enough funerals.

[15:58] That's what I said.

[15:58] You want equity.

[16:01] Exactly.

[16:01] We have an act.

Dan McCoy

[16:02] Let's have Funeral Wedding Parody, please, you said.

[16:05] Yes.

[16:05] Thank you.

[16:06] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[16:06] Death at a Funeral.

[16:07] Perfect.

Elliott Kalan

[16:09] Excellent.

[16:09] I mean, just throw a wedding in there, and then it'll be all fine.

[16:12] So, again, haven't seen it.

[16:13] Maybe there's a wedding in that also.

[16:15] Okay.

[16:15] Dan, this one's for you then.

[16:17] Gerard Depardieu and Andy McDowell.

[16:20] Is that green card?

[16:22] That's green card.

[16:24] Okay.

[16:24] Stuart, this one's for you.

[16:26] Samara Weaving and Mark O'Brien.

Stuart Wellington

[16:30] Wait.

Elliott Kalan

[16:33] Ready or not?

[16:34] You got it.

[16:35] Ready or not?

[16:36] And wait.

[16:36] Was that three Andy McDowell movies in a row?

[16:39] It was a surprise.

[16:39] Oh, man.

[16:41] Andy McDowell hat trick.

[16:42] A mini segment we call Mac and Towel, Mac and Towel Go Together Like a Horse and Towel.

[16:48] That segment is over now, though, and back to the main game.

Dan McCoy

[16:51] I guess if you ride a horse hard and put it away wet, a towel needs to be involved.

[16:56] Need to wipe away that wet.

Elliott Kalan

[16:57] Use a towel.

[16:58] Yeah.

[16:59] Makes sense.

[17:00] Go together.

[17:01] So, Dan, this one's for you.

[17:03] Adam Sandler and Kevin James.

[17:05] And what movie did they get married?

[17:06] That is, damn it.

[17:07] I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry.

[17:09] You got that right.

[17:10] I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry.

[17:12] I now pronounce you correct.

[17:15] That's what I should have said.

[17:16] I was too busy thinking about how that movie is a crime against the human race.

[17:19] But moving on, here is the final round of this round.

[17:24] There are two more rounds after this main game.

[17:26] This final segment of the round is called –

[17:27] We're in a sub-around.

[17:29] This is a side quest inside the main quest.

[17:32] This round is called Dearly Be Puppeted, and you'll understand why when you hear the questions.

[17:38] Stuart, this first one is for you.

[17:40] In what movie do Jim Henson and Frank Oz get married?

[17:49] Fuck.

[17:51] The Muppet movie?

[17:53] No, you're on the right track, but not quite.

[17:56] I'm going to give you another guess.

[17:59] Muppets take Manhattan?

[18:00] Yes, you got it.

[18:01] The Muppets take Manhattan.

[18:02] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[18:02] There you go.

[18:02] Yeah, somebody's getting married.

[18:05] Yeah, that one I wanted to give you another one because I knew Dan was waiting like a vulture to just swoop down and pull it out of your mouth.

[18:11] Yeah.

[18:11] And Dan, this one's for you.

[18:13] In what movie does Robert Picardo and the voice of Mark Dodson get married?

Dan McCoy

[18:18] I'm sorry, the voice of Mark – I'm assuming that's Gremlins 2, the new batch?

[18:24] It's Gremlins 2, the new batch.

Elliott Kalan

[18:25] I don't know the name of the puppeteer, but Mark Dodson is credited on the internet at least as the voice of Greta the Gremlin.

[18:33] And guys, that's the end of our first round, the first round of T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[18:51] Goodness, right after this word from our sponsor.

[18:54] Dan, who is T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W?

[19:01] Sponsored by this week.

Dan McCoy

[19:03] It's Loomilabs.

[19:04] If you have listened to Elliot rattle off a string of letters three times in a row, you've probably heard about microdosing because that's the easiest way to enjoy such shenanigans.

[19:18] Oh, to survive it, yeah.

[19:19] If not, if you haven't heard of such things, just know that all sorts of people are microdosing daily to feel healthier and perform better.

[19:29] You'll never know.

[19:30] They could be around you right now.

[19:31] They could be looking at you at this very moment.

[19:35] Our show today is sponsored by microdose gummies.

[19:39] Microdose gummies deliver perfect entry-level doses of THC that help you find just the right amount of good or feel just the right amount of good, but also find it.

[19:49] You've got to find it to feel it.

[19:52] That's the old saying.

[19:55] Look, I've tried these things.

[19:56] It is very enjoyable.

[20:00] It gives you a dose that makes you feel a little better, a little more relaxed, a little calmer, a little more creative, but doesn't take you into a world where, as a stronger dose might, you don't understand what's going on.

[20:21] That's the sweet spot.

[20:22] That's what we call the sweet spot in science.

[20:25] So what I would like to tell you, the listener, is that microdose is available nationwide.

[20:32] And if you'd like to learn more about microdosing THC, go to microdose.com and use code FLOP.

[20:39] That spells FLOP to get free shipping and 30% off your first order.

[20:46] Links can be found in the show description.

[20:48] But again, that is microdose.com, code FLOP.

Stuart Wellington

[20:54] Yeah, you've got to find your sweet spot so you can feel your sweet spot.

Elliott Kalan

[20:57] But then don't just spend your whole time feeling your sweet spot.

[21:01] I know the temptation is there, but you've got to go do other things.

Dan McCoy

[21:04] That's the thing about being an adult.

[21:07] You have the freedom to just sit around feeling your sweet spot all day, but you know that there's other stuff you've got to get done.

Elliott Kalan

[21:14] Even when I'm at work?

[21:17] That's up to you, Stuart.

[21:17] I mean, you could.

Elliott Kalan

[21:18] I mean, you shouldn't.

[21:19] I mean, you're your boss, so I don't know who you're going to fire you.

[21:22] Thanks.

S4

[21:22] This week, Greatest Discovery becomes Greatest Trek.

[21:33] That's because Greatest Trek is for way more than just Discovery.

[21:36] We renamed our hit show that's on Maximum Fun covering all the new Star Trek shows.

[21:42] Lower Decks, Strange New Worlds, Picard, Prodigy, Discovery, and any other new Star Trek show Paramount throws at us.

S5

[21:49] Come find out why we're the most important Star Trek podcast on the internet with our funny, informative recaps of all the new Star Trek shows that Paramount keeps churning out.

S4

[22:00] Subscribe to Greatest Trek.

[22:02] It's a new Star Trek podcast from the makers of the greatest generation.

S6

[22:07] Hey there.

[22:08] It's Annabelle Gurwidge.

[22:09] And I'm Laura House.

[22:10] We host Tiny Victories, the 15-minute podcast that's about the little things.

[22:15] Getting into the Tiny Victory frame of mine is about recognizing minor accomplishments and fleeting joys.

[22:22] Isn't it a wonderful day when the first password you try actually works?

S4

[22:28] When it's freezing cold outside and toasty as all get out in my shower.

[22:33] My tiny victory is that I turn off the water and get on with my day.

S6

[22:38] We can't change this big, dumb world, but we can celebrate the tiny wins.

[22:42] So join us on Maximum Fun or wherever you listen to podcasts.

[22:46] Let's get tiny!

Elliott Kalan

[22:51] Well, after that talk of sweet spots, it's time to come back to TFHITAWWNMAMTABITCMTABTPAAATW.

[23:01] And just a reminder, Dan and Stuart are our TFHITAWWNMAMTABITCMTABTPAAATWers today.

[23:10] And they're doing great.

[23:11] Let's look at right now.

[23:13] After round one, Dan is in a slight lead.

[23:15] He has eight points to Stu's five points.

[23:17] So, Stu, still within striking distance.

[23:20] This is still anyone's game of TFHITAWWNMAMTABITCMTABTPAAATW.

[23:28] I don't know why I said it that way.

[23:30] I said it weird.

[23:32] All right.

[23:32] Guys, it's time for round two.

[23:34] This round is called Best Man or Forever Hold Your Peace.

[23:37] This is a little different than the last round.

[23:39] The last round was just pure trivia knowledge.

[23:41] This round, you're going to have to use a little bit of your creative skills.

[23:44] Okay, we're going to look at two different relationships.

[23:48] Let's say these characters from the movies are getting married.

[23:51] One of you is going to take a turn for each one as the best man giving a speech about how great the couple is.

[23:56] The other will play the part of the person objecting at the wedding and saying that, you know, these two couples, this couple should not get married.

[24:06] Oh, wow.

[24:06] So, Dan, since Stuart went first in the last round and you're in the lead, you get to choose whether you'd rather be the best man first or the person objecting first to our first couple.

Dan McCoy

[24:16] I would like to be the hater first.

[24:18] Okay, you'll be the hater.

[24:19] Shit.

[24:20] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[24:20] So, Stuart, you'll be the best man.

[24:22] So, this first couple is Buzz Lightyear and Jesse the Cowgirl from Toy Story 3.

[24:27] Stuart, you're there giving a speech about who would like to go first, Dan or Stu, the hater or the best man?

Stuart Wellington

[24:34] I mean, I feel like the best man should give the speech first before the hater or the first man.

[24:38] That's what I feel like too.

Elliott Kalan

[24:38] Okay, so, Stuart, you're the best man.

[24:41] It's the reception or maybe it's one of those weddings where the best man is doing the actual ceremony and it feels more like a long inside joke speech than an actual sacred ceremony that bonds two souls for eternity.

[24:52] You're there because you're either your best bud, Buzz, or your best gal, Jesse.

[24:56] I don't know who you're supporting, but you're talking about what a great couple they are, why they should always be together.

[25:01] Give us your best man's speech for Buzz Lightyear and Jesse the Cowgirl.

Stuart Wellington

[25:05] So, I got up here to – I'm sorry.

[25:11] Buzz asked me to give a little bit of a – wait.

[25:16] Okay, so Buzz asked me to give a little speech on his big night and, yeah, I mean, what can I say about this?

[25:27] Like, he's a crazy man.

[25:29] Like, remember that time we – remember that time when we went out to Queens and had drinks?

[25:37] You know, he knows what I mean.

[25:38] You know what I mean.

[25:40] So, yeah, like, he's always there for me and, like, Jesse, you're – I mean, you know, you got to kiss a lot of frogs, you know?

[25:52] And Buzz, man, he's always got my – you always got my back.

[25:57] I always got your back, bro, anytime.

[26:00] Yeah.

[26:01] So, let's give it up.

[26:04] Let's – come on, dude.

[26:06] Let's do a toast to Buzz and Jesse forever.

Elliott Kalan

[26:11] Okay.

[26:12] That was great.

[26:13] It was short on specifics, but it was long on realism.

[26:19] So, Dan, now you are the hater.

[26:22] You are objecting to this wedding between Buzz Lightyear and Jesse the Cowgirl.

[26:25] Stand up and tell everyone what your problem is.

Dan McCoy

[26:27] So, there are twin pillars of my argument against this relationship.

[26:30] Number one, the age difference, depending on how you're looking at it, the age difference cuts both ways.

[26:39] Number one, Jesse seems to be indefined as her age, but she seems maybe late teens.

[26:46] And Buzz Lightyear reads as sort of late 30s, early 40s character.

[26:54] Whereas, also, Flip It, Jesse seems to be based on some sort of black and white TV show from the 50s.

[27:04] Whereas, Buzz Lightyear seems to be a modern toy of some stripes.

[27:09] So, the other way doesn't work either.

[27:13] And, also, I don't think they have anything in common.

[27:16] One is a cowboy.

[27:18] One is a spaceman.

[27:20] This is the second pillar of your argument?

[27:22] This is the second pillar.

[27:23] If the movie Cowboys and Aliens has taught us nothing else, it's that mixing cowboys and space stuff doesn't work.

[27:31] So, boo to this union.

[27:34] Boo, I say.

Elliott Kalan

[27:36] Wow.

[27:37] Okay, both strong arguments.

[27:38] Strong, really aggressive argument.

[27:40] It seems both of you had a little bit of the nip of the tail before you came to this wedding.

[27:47] Each of you had a taste of the toy, what bit you?

[27:50] So, okay.

[27:52] Strong showing.

[27:53] Now, there's one more of these in this round.

[27:55] Now, in this one, we're flipping spaces.

[27:57] Dan, you're the best man.

[27:59] Okay.

[27:59] You're going to talk about this couple and how great they are.

[28:01] Stuart, you're objecting.

[28:02] You don't think they should get married.

[28:03] This is Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura from Predator.

[28:06] They're obviously lovers in the movie.

[28:08] It's not stated outright, but it seems pretty clear to me watching the film recently as I did re-watching it after watching Prey.

[28:14] I said, let me re-watch the original Predator.

[28:16] And I said, this movie is exactly the movie I remembered it, except for the obvious affection between Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura.

[28:21] So, okay.

[28:22] Dan, you're the best man.

[28:23] Tell us why these two—

Stuart Wellington

[28:24] Playing the character is Mac and what's Jesse Ventura's name?

Elliott Kalan

[28:27] Jesse Ventura's character name is—hold on.

[28:30] Let me look it up because I forgot it.

Stuart Wellington

[28:31] Yeah, I mean, Bill Duke's Mac is one of the best action movie performances of all time.

[28:37] Oh, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[28:37] So, in Predator, he plays Blaine.

[28:41] Blaine, right.

[28:42] Blaine, yeah.

[28:42] So, this is between—and now, it's your choice, Dan, whether this is between the characters, Blaine and Mac, or this is between the actors, Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura.

[28:49] Sure.

[28:49] You're the best man.

[28:52] Look, I—

[28:53] You're the best man.

[28:54] It's your choice who's getting married.

[28:55] Go for it.

Dan McCoy

[28:55] Here's what I'm going to say.

[28:56] I'll be frank.

[28:58] I don't—I know that everyone's going to hate me for this.

[29:02] Don't particularly go for the movie Predator.

[29:07] To me, a little too much bang, bang, bang for an action movie.

[29:12] Like, just people shooting at each other doesn't excite me.

[29:16] A humanoid alien doesn't really excite me.

[29:20] Be a little more creative.

[29:21] This is the best man speech.

[29:22] This is what I'm saying.

[29:24] I'm saying that, like, it may not be for me, and maybe that means that I don't actually know really who these characters are.

[29:34] Because all I remember is the second half of the movie, once all these characters have been killed, and Arnie and the Predator are facing off against each other.

[29:43] But I'll tell you something.

[29:45] To have the guts to be an outcouple in an action movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger shooting at an alien in the 80s, that means that the love must be true.

[29:59] So raise a glass to Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura.

[30:04] Okay.

[30:05] So that's the extent of it.

[30:05] And their union.

Stuart Wellington

[30:06] Yeah.

[30:07] Can't believe Dan topped my best man speech.

[30:09] He's there.

[30:13] He's fucking no-scoped it on me.

[30:15] I like, ugh.

Elliott Kalan

[30:16] One of those best man speeches where the families of both sides are, like, looking at each other really embarrassed, like, ugh, what's going to happen here?

[30:24] But then he pulled it out at the end.

[30:26] Yeah, yeah.

[30:26] He got a lot of guts, Dan.

[30:27] It takes a lot of guts to go to Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura's wedding and talk about how you don't like Predator.

Dan McCoy

[30:32] I'm sorry.

[30:33] I mean, it's not that I don't like it.

[30:35] I just, you know, it's never been one of my favorites of the 80s creature features.

Elliott Kalan

[30:39] Well, I certainly have always felt it was that Predator was punching above its league by getting tied to Alien.

[30:45] Yes.

[30:45] Because Alien and Aliens are such beautifully made movies.

[30:48] Alien is a nearly perfect movie of that form.

[30:51] And Predator, re-watching it, I was like, there's a lot I don't remember about Predator.

[30:54] And I watched it and I was like, oh, no, I remember all of it.

[30:57] It's an incredibly thin movie.

[30:58] Like, there's not a lot going on in this movie.

Stuart Wellington

[31:00] But that's part of the appeal.

[31:02] It's a nice movie about an alien that shows up and then they do some battles.

[31:06] Exactly.

[31:06] They do some battles.

Elliott Kalan

[31:07] That's great.

[31:08] Now, but Dan, it takes guts.

[31:10] It takes guts.

[31:11] I got my work cut out for me.

[31:12] Speaking of guts, Stuart, you're about to go to Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura's wedding and tell them why they shouldn't get married.

[31:17] You are going to leave beat up.

[31:19] So what's your speech?

[31:21] Go for it.

[31:21] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[31:22] I burst into the chapel.

[31:24] My clothes, ragged and dusty.

[31:26] My hair, wild.

[31:28] My eyes, crazy.

[31:29] I have been crying.

[31:32] And I say, stop.

[31:34] Stop.

[31:35] Mac and Blaine can't get married because I'm already married to Mac.

[31:40] The crowd goes insane.

[31:42] People are losing their minds.

[31:44] He's locked me up in the attic.

[31:47] Of course he did.

[31:49] And now he's found a new piece in this Blaine?

[31:53] I'm Mr. Mac.

[31:54] This is bullshit.

[31:57] Okay.

[31:58] Wow.

[31:59] And then shortly after, I burn down the house.

[32:02] I die in the fire.

[32:04] Mac is horribly burned, which is not as bad as what happens to him in the movie, strangely.

Elliott Kalan

[32:09] Yeah, the movie is torn apart by an alien missile, right?

[32:12] Yeah.

[32:13] Oh, no, it gets shot through his head.

[32:14] Shot through his head.

[32:15] It's awesome.

[32:16] Very gothic romance.

[32:16] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[32:16] And so you're saying Jesse Ventura then shows up to find Bill Duke blind but ready to love again.

[32:24] Love him anyway.

[32:26] Okay.

Stuart Wellington

[32:26] Loves him anyway despite every description of him as being like a shitbag and ugly.

Elliott Kalan

[32:32] So I did not expect it to go in that direction.

[32:35] I didn't realize that other than just bringing on Shane Black for uncredited rewrites, they also brought in the Brontes as well.

[32:43] Yeah.

[32:47] But I'm all for it.

[32:48] That sounds great.

[32:49] So guys, I'll tell you what.

[32:51] After that round, the scores are now tied.

[32:53] You each have 15 points.

[32:55] So going into round three of T-F-H-A-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W, the scores are tied.

[33:08] There's only one round left.

[33:08] I got you corrected that before Twitter got a hold of it.

[33:10] Oh, it would have been a nightmare.

[33:13] So guys, we're on to round three of T-F-H-I-T-A-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[33:23] And we're going to go back and limber up that knowledge part of your brain again.

[33:27] We're done with creativity.

[33:28] You both did a fantastic job.

[33:30] That was the essay section of the college application, and you both got accepted to movie university.

[33:35] So here it is, round three.

[33:38] We're going to take things in a little bit of a darker direction.

[33:41] This category is called Till Death Do Us Part because people have said half of all marriages end in divorce, which means the other half end in death, which is true.

[33:51] All things end in death because we are mortal.

[33:53] Nobody lives forever.

[33:54] And so funerals, like weddings, are an important part of life, and they also involve a lot of crying and formal wear and varying degrees of catering, varying degrees of quality.

[34:04] And there's flowers in there too.

[34:05] So a funeral is kind of like the flip side of a wedding.

[34:07] The funeral is like, oh, we're not so different, you and I.

[34:10] Two sides of the same.

[34:12] You're going to end up skellingtons.

[34:14] Yeah, and the wedding is like, I'm nothing like you.

[34:16] I don't kill.

[34:17] And the funeral is like, don't you?

[34:19] And the wedding is like, no, I don't.

[34:20] I don't understand.

[34:21] Why am I?

[34:22] Anyway, that's what they say.

[34:24] So that's enough of a connection, I think, for this game.

[34:26] So in this game.

[34:27] Yeah, yeah, it works.

[34:27] Remember how in the first round I named the people getting married, and you told me the movie.

[34:32] In this one, I'm going to name the actor whose funeral it is in the movie.

[34:35] And you're going to tell me what the movie is.

[34:39] Okay.

[34:40] Okay.

[34:40] So are you ready?

[34:41] This is round three of T-A-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[34:49] Till death do us part.

[34:50] And Stuart, you're going to go first on this one.

[34:52] Mm-hmm.

[34:53] Mm-hmm.

[34:54] Mm-hmm.

[34:54] So you went first in the first round.

[34:57] So this first one, Gene Hackman.

[34:59] In what movie do we see Gene Hackman's funeral?

Stuart Wellington

[35:02] Okay.

[35:03] Gene Hackman.

[35:05] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[35:05] Let's see.

[35:06] Not to be confused with Gene Pac-Man, who, of course, eats up power pellets and is chased by ghosts all the time.

[35:13] Gene Hackman does not eat power pellets, though he is chased by ghosts.

Stuart Wellington

[35:16] So it's not Unforgiven.

[35:20] It's because he does die in that.

[35:24] We don't see his funeral, yeah.

[35:25] Yeah.

[35:28] Man, I don't know.

[35:30] It's not Welcome to Mooseport.

[35:33] It's a final film.

[35:35] Royal Tenenbaums, maybe?

Elliott Kalan

[35:36] You're exactly right.

[35:37] It's Royal Tenenbaums.

[35:38] It is.

[35:39] The Royal Tenenbaums.

Dan McCoy

[35:41] And I would like to give a personal, just like a PSA.

[35:46] It's not called the Royal Tenenbaums.

[35:49] That would be the Royal Christmas Trees, a thing I've heard many times.

[35:54] It's an E, Tenenbaums.

[35:57] That's just a personal, the more you know from me to you.

Elliott Kalan

[36:00] This is an issue I didn't even know existed, but I'm so glad that you've brought my attention to it so that I can go back to forgetting about it.

Dan McCoy

[36:06] This is my petty charity that I run.

[36:10] Say the Royal Tenenbaums right.

[36:15] I haven't been able to get a non-profit status for it.

[36:20] I talked to the government.

[36:22] They're like, this seems like a really asshole correction to make, and we don't want to be part of it.

[36:27] Yeah, so.

Elliott Kalan

[36:30] Yeah, I agree with them.

[36:31] So, Dan, let's just say there was a movie called The Royal Tenenbaums.

[36:36] What would that movie be about?

Dan McCoy

[36:38] It would be about a bunch of Christmas trees that are royal blue.

Elliott Kalan

[36:43] Blue Christmas trees, okay.

Dan McCoy

[36:45] Yeah, well, that's the gimmick of it.

[36:50] It's an ad man of the 60s being like, blue Christmas trees?

[36:55] How do we sell this?

[36:56] Like a Hudsucker proxy type thing?

[36:58] Yeah, exactly.

Elliott Kalan

[36:59] Okay, and now the leaves are blue, or the trunks are blue, or just the whole thing's blue?

Dan McCoy

[37:04] They're needles, right?

[37:05] It's a conifer, Elliot.

[37:06] I don't know what leaves you're talking about.

Elliott Kalan

[37:08] Well, the needles are essentially the leaves of a conifer.

[37:11] It's just a different way of evolving a thing that you use for photosynthesis and for respiration.

[37:15] Sure.

Dan McCoy

[37:16] Well, now we've gone too far down a track where I'm being annoying.

[37:21] So, let's go back to the questions.

Elliott Kalan

[37:24] We were safer when you were just correcting the way people pronounced a movie that not that many people talk about too much anymore.

[37:31] So, okay.

[37:32] Then, Dan, this one's for you.

[37:33] Stuart, you aced that.

[37:35] You pulled it out.

[37:35] Yes, thank you.

[37:36] Let's see if Dan's going to feel the same way about this one.

[37:39] Macaulay Culkin.

Dan McCoy

[37:41] That would be, spoiler alert, the film My Girl.

Elliott Kalan

[37:48] You're right, My Girl.

[37:49] Thanks for the spoiler alert for a movie that is, I think, 30 years old now?

[37:53] Well, you know.

Stuart Wellington

[37:54] I feel like a lot of audiences should have gotten that spoiler ahead of time.

[37:58] Yeah, the trailer for that did not indicate how sad that was going to get.

Elliott Kalan

[38:02] No, the trailer really makes it look like a laugh a minute wacky comedy about two kids.

Dan McCoy

[38:07] If you loved Home Alone, you're going to watch the shit out of this.

[38:10] It should have been, if you want to see that kid from Home Alone die from bees.

Elliott Kalan

[38:15] Hey, don't you wish.

Stuart Wellington

[38:17] Finish the job the Wet Bandits started.

Elliott Kalan

[38:19] Yeah, don't you wish the Wet Bandits finally got it up on little Kevin?

[38:24] Finally, you can.

[38:25] Now, that was this movie that I didn't see in the theaters, but my mom and my sister went.

[38:29] And they talked about how it was.

[38:30] They were very shocked by his dying in it and were not expecting it.

[38:33] And then during the funeral scene, an old person in the theater let rip with an enormous fart.

[38:37] And it really cut the tension.

Dan McCoy

[38:38] Oh, my God.

[38:40] Yeah.

[38:40] Perfect.

[38:42] That's what you needed that moment.

Elliott Kalan

[38:43] Yeah.

[38:44] Speaking of what you needed that moment, it's time that we need another question.

[38:46] And so, Stuart, this one's for you.

[38:48] In what movie do we see Steve Buscemi's or Steve Buscemi's or Buscemi's, however you want to pronounce it.

[38:53] I'm not a Royal Tannenbaum Tannenbaum type guy.

[38:55] I pronounce it however you want.

[38:56] Thank you.

[38:57] What movie do we see Steve Buscemi's funeral?

Stuart Wellington

[38:59] Okay.

[39:00] So, we're talking about Steve Buscemi, an actor who I saw eating a meal outside of a restaurant like two weeks ago, right?

[39:10] Yeah, the same one.

[39:11] That's the same guy.

Elliott Kalan

[39:11] The same one I used to see walking around in the same neighborhood.

[39:14] And he would notice that I noticed him and then turn away.

Dan McCoy

[39:17] The same guy that you want to brag about just running into by happenstance.

[39:25] That's the one.

[39:27] What was he eating?

[39:28] What was he eating?

[39:29] Hey, I'm just trying to clarify.

Stuart Wellington

[39:30] I'm just trying – it's for the game.

Elliott Kalan

[39:32] There's nothing in the rulebook that says I can't ask these questions.

[39:36] But you've introduced a tangent which is called Elliot's Neighborhood Stories.

[39:40] And I just want to talk about the two famous people I used to pass by all the time when I lived in Parks, Love, Brooklyn.

[39:44] Steve Buscemi, who did not want to be bothered during his errands.

[39:47] And John Turturro, who would just walk into traffic and yell at cars, whistle loudly.

[39:52] It just seems like if he was not famous, he would just be a neighborhood character.

[39:55] I used to love just seeing him.

[39:58] So, Steve Buscemi, what movie do we see his funeral?

[40:00] The same Steve Buscemi, yes, that you saw eating outside a restaurant.

[40:02] Now, he was eating – it wasn't like he was eating out of a can.

[40:05] I still want to know what he was having.

[40:06] Just standing outside a restaurant.

[40:06] No, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[40:07] He wasn't like some kind of raccoon character.

[40:10] It was like researching a role.

[40:11] What sort of food?

[40:12] Yeah.

[40:13] Researching a raccoon role.

Elliott Kalan

[40:15] I believe you're talking about the Big Lebowski.

[40:18] That is the Big Lebowski.

[40:19] Correct.

[40:20] It is a funeral for him in the Big Lebowski that ends with the other characters covered in his ashes.

[40:26] Hilarious and poignant scene.

[40:27] Dan, number four.

[40:29] Here's – some people I guess would call him the Steve Buscemi of his day maybe.

[40:32] William Hickey.

[40:33] And what movie do we see William Hickey's funeral?

Dan McCoy

[40:38] I'm going to take a stab here.

[40:41] Is that Preachy's Honor?

Elliott Kalan

[40:44] Not the one I'm thinking of.

[40:45] I could not remember if he actually has a funeral on camera.

[40:48] He might, in which case I apologize if you lose base on this, but it's been so long since I've seen Preachy's Honor.

[40:55] But there's another movie I'm thinking of where he has a funeral at the beginning of the movie.

[40:58] The funeral doesn't go well.

[41:00] Do you want another crack at it?

Dan McCoy

[41:02] The funeral doesn't – well, he's not dead in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation unless he's playing a zombie.

[41:12] Possible.

[41:15] I'm not going to come up with it.

[41:18] I'll let Stu try and steal if he has the wearable.

Stuart Wellington

[41:22] Yeah, I'm going to steal it.

[41:23] Was it Preachy's Honor?

Elliott Kalan

[41:26] No, well, you've both made a valiant effort.

[41:28] It's possible, in which case you've canceled each other out.

[41:30] I couldn't remember if he was actually dead – if he had a funeral on that and Wikipedia was no help in its summary.

[41:36] So the movie I'm looking for is Mouse Hunt.

[41:38] That's right, Mouse Hunt with Nathan Lane.

[41:40] Oh, yeah, man.

[41:41] Hunt.

[41:42] Which opens with his funeral, which ends with his body getting hurled out of the coffin into a manhole.

[41:50] Sounds hilarious.

[41:52] Yeah, it's great.

[41:53] So if you both got a point, it cancels each other out, or you didn't get a point.

[41:56] It doesn't matter.

[41:57] So right in care of Elliot Kalin at the Flophouse, do we see William Hickey's funeral in Princey's Honor?

[42:03] I don't remember.

[42:04] Okay, so here's the next question.

[42:07] This is for Stuart, and that is Orson Welles twice in the same movie.

[42:13] In what movie do we see Orson Welles have two funerals?

Stuart Wellington

[42:19] Transformers the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[42:21] No, he had a funeral in real life shortly after recording his role for Transformers the movie.

[42:27] Dan, would you like to steal?

Dan McCoy

[42:29] This is one of my standard answers for like – it's always in one of my top five movies.

[42:37] The Third Man.

Elliott Kalan

[42:38] Yep, that's The Third Man.

[42:40] Yeah.

[42:40] Beautiful movie.

[42:41] Fantastic movie.

[42:42] Opens with a funeral, and then there's a funeral at the end.

[42:45] And then you get to see a lady walk down a path for a really long time.

[42:48] But in the context of the movie –

Dan McCoy

[42:50] In the context of the movie, you're like, what's going on?

[42:52] What's she thinking?

[42:53] What's going to happen?

[42:54] Exactly, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[42:54] And I don't know if you guys know this.

[42:56] It has a really fascinating Zither score.

[42:59] Yeah.

[42:59] Thanks, Stuart.

[43:00] Thanks.

[43:00] One of the top Zither scores ever.

Elliott Kalan

[43:03] I think if you were going to put together –

[43:05] In the top three, at least.

[43:07] Just like top Zither scored movies.

[43:09] And if you're going to put Zither composers, Anton Karras just has to be up there.

[43:13] Just real high.

[43:14] Yeah, he's one of the best.

Dan McCoy

[43:14] For me, guys, Anton Karras.

[43:18] This might be controversial, but top Zither – Zitherman.

Elliott Kalan

[43:22] It's weird.

[43:23] Some people say to me all the time, they go, Elliot, who do you think is the greatest film composer of all time?

[43:28] And I'm like, well, maybe John Williams, maybe Ennio Morricone.

[43:31] And they go, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh, on the Zither.

[43:34] Yeah, Zither category.

[43:34] And I say, well, then there's no competition.

[43:36] Anton Karras blows them all away.

[43:37] Yeah.

[43:38] Top film composer, Zither Division.

[43:40] Yeah.

[43:41] Which was the original name of Joy Division.

[43:43] They had to change it to Zither Division because there's already a band called Zither Division because Anton Karras was so popular at the time.

[43:49] Yeah.

[43:49] Okay.

[43:50] So, Dan, now this next one's really excellent steel, nice steel.

[43:53] A real criminal, just like Harry Lyme in The Third Man.

[43:58] Though he's more of a black marketeer than a thief necessarily.

[44:01] But he's stealing the life out of children with his watered-down medicine.

[44:04] So, Dan, you're just like that.

[44:06] And here, the next one goes right back to you.

[44:08] This is Gregory Peck and Lee Remick.

[44:11] It's a double funeral.

[44:13] Gregory Peck and Lee.

[44:16] Is this The Omen?

[44:18] Yes, you're right.

[44:19] It's The Omen.

[44:20] Wasn't sure you would get it or not.

[44:22] Because the only part really worth remembering in that movie is when David Warner's head gets slashed off.

[44:27] That's not.

[44:27] Rest in peace with that huge plate glass window.

Dan McCoy

[44:30] There's also the part where she says, the Danny says, it's all for you, Damien.

Elliott Kalan

[44:35] Yeah, that's true.

[44:36] That's a pretty good part.

[44:36] That part's pretty good, too.

[44:37] Yeah.

[44:37] That's a good point.

[44:38] Okay, Stuart.

[44:39] Let's see if you can make up some points.

[44:41] You're only behind Dan by one at this point.

[44:44] Can you make it up with this one?

[44:45] Leonard Nimoy.

[44:46] In what movie do we see a funeral for Leonard Nimoy?

[44:49] Or Nimoy, as some people say, Dan.

[44:51] Don't correct me.

[44:53] I wouldn't dream of it.

[44:55] I know he's just big on pronunciations.

[44:57] I got this one.

Stuart Wellington

[44:59] Transformers, the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[45:01] No.

[45:02] No, no.

[45:03] I mean, the genre is somewhat correct.

[45:05] Is that your final answer?

Stuart Wellington

[45:08] Yeah, I get multiple answers.

[45:10] Okay, let's do it.

Elliott Kalan

[45:12] Dan, you going to steal?

[45:12] You going to swoop in and steal this heel?

[45:14] Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan?

[45:18] Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan.

[45:20] It's also known in Germany, Star Trek II, The Wrath von Khan.

[45:24] Oh, cool.

[45:26] Yeah.

[45:26] They don't have a word for wrath, strangely enough.

[45:30] Okay, guys.

[45:30] Yeah, weird.

[45:31] Wait.

[45:32] Do you hear that swift sound?

[45:36] That swift sound means it's time for a mini segment inside this segment.

[45:39] It's one of our patent T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[45:46] Patented segments.

[45:47] People love it.

[45:48] This is MCU, Marvel Cemetery Universe, Funerals in Superhero Movies.

[45:53] So this is just a clue for you for each of these.

[45:55] It's a movie.

[45:56] It's a superhero movie that this is in.

[45:57] Okay.

[45:58] So I think maybe let's make these up.

[46:00] Okay.

[46:00] Dan, you get this first one.

[46:01] Robert Downey Jr.

Dan McCoy

[46:03] Wait.

[46:04] The movie that his funeral was in?

[46:06] Yeah.

[46:08] Avengers Endgame.

[46:09] You got it.

[46:10] Okay.

[46:11] Stuart, Willem Dafoe.

Elliott Kalan

[46:14] It would be Spider-Man.

[46:16] You got it.

[46:17] Dan, Michael Rooker.

Dan McCoy

[46:20] Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2.

[46:24] And Stuart, Chris Pine, but only his voice.

Stuart Wellington

[46:28] Oh, Spider-Man multiverse movie.

Elliott Kalan

[46:32] Should I?

[46:33] A Spider-Verse.

Stuart Wellington

[46:35] Spider-Verse movie.

Elliott Kalan

[46:36] I'll allow it.

[46:37] Judges, I'll allow it.

[46:38] Spider-Man into the Spider-Verse.

[46:40] I know you knew which movie it was.

[46:41] And now we go back to the main game.

[46:43] That was a fast lightning round for MCU.

[46:45] Great work, guys.

[46:46] Okay.

[46:47] There's only a few questions left in the game.

[46:48] Okay.

[46:49] This next one is for Dan.

[46:51] Henry Cavill.

Dan McCoy

[46:56] Oh, fuck.

[47:00] Which one was he?

[47:03] Is it Batman versus Superman?

[47:06] Give me the full title.

[47:07] Dawn of Justice?

Elliott Kalan

[47:09] Yes.

[47:09] I was going to be pedantic about that one.

[47:11] Batman versus Superman.

[47:11] It couldn't have been, of course, in the MCU category because it's not in Marvel.

[47:14] Yeah, yeah.

[47:14] No, you're right.

[47:15] It's instead in the Snyderverse since Zack Snyder now, I guess, owns those characters.

[47:20] The Snyder's pretzelverse.

[47:24] I feel like someone at DC.

S5

[47:27] I prefer a dog pretzelverse.

[47:28] Mr. Salty.

Elliott Kalan

[47:30] We've got to work on this Uts cinematic universe.

[47:34] Or Uts-iverse.

[47:35] It's the only way to compete.

[47:36] I feel like someone at DC or Warner Brothers wished on a monkey's paw for a superhero universe.

[47:41] And it's only led to problem after problem for them.

[47:44] Okay.

[47:45] Stuart, this one's for you.

[47:46] Samuel L. Jackson.

[47:47] Which movie do you see a funeral for Samuel L. Jackson?

Stuart Wellington

[47:53] Oh, man.

[47:54] Wait a minute.

Elliott Kalan

[47:57] I can give you a hint if you'd like it.

[47:59] Give me a hint.

[48:01] He's not really dead.

[48:03] Yeah.

[48:03] He attends his own funeral.

Stuart Wellington

[48:07] Is it?

[48:13] It's Captain America Winter Soldier.

[48:17] No.

Elliott Kalan

[48:17] Does he have a funeral in that one?

[48:19] I know.

[48:19] I think he's dead.

[48:19] Maybe not.

[48:20] Does he have a funeral?

Stuart Wellington

[48:21] I don't fucking know.

[48:22] I don't remember.

Dan McCoy

[48:24] I couldn't remember.

[48:25] Dan, do you know it?

[48:25] Oh, that's what I thought was the one that we were going for.

Elliott Kalan

[48:29] Stuart, I'm going to.

[48:29] Okay, so Dan, you don't want to.

[48:30] You're trying to steal and you're going for that one?

[48:31] Wait, is it.

Dan McCoy

[48:32] So it's not a Marvel thing.

Elliott Kalan

[48:34] Is it Jackie Brown?

Dan McCoy

[48:35] Are we talking about.

Elliott Kalan

[48:36] We're out of Marvel Cemetery Universe.

[48:38] I know.

[48:38] We're not going for that anymore.

Dan McCoy

[48:39] Are we talking about the return of Xander Cage?

Elliott Kalan

[48:44] Doesn't he die in that one, but he's not actually dead?

[48:47] We are talking about Triple X, the return of Xander Cage.

[48:51] That's the one in which he is killed by a satellite falling to earth and exploding right next to him.

[48:56] And then it's revealed at the end that it was a fake.

[48:57] No, you're right.

[48:58] And he somehow survived it.

[49:00] I'm an idiot.

[49:02] No, no, he does fake his death in Winter Soldier, but I don't know if there's a funeral or not.

[49:05] Again, that's the thing with these characters, these actors who are in a lot of movies.

[49:09] Sometimes they have multiple funerals.

[49:11] And finally, okay, this will be the final question of this round except for a bonus question.

[49:16] Dan, this one's for you.

[49:17] Simon Callow.

[49:19] In what movie does Simon Callow have a funeral?

Dan McCoy

[49:21] Simon Callow, four weddings and a funeral.

[49:24] He is the titular funeral in that film.

Elliott Kalan

[49:27] He is the funeral in that one.

[49:30] Now, here's a bonus question.

[49:31] Here's a bonus question.

[49:33] Stuart, if you get this one, so let's do a quick tally of the scores.

[49:37] Dan is currently up by five points.

[49:40] If you get this one, I will give you six points to win the game.

[49:45] It's not fair, but okay.

[49:47] It's not very fair, but we're not always fair here.

[49:49] T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[49:55] We're not always fair.

[49:56] Sometimes we're just in it for the lulz.

[49:57] Okay.

[49:57] Does anyone say that anymore?

[49:58] I don't think so.

[49:59] So, Stuart.

[50:01] Yeah.

[50:02] Harris Howe Strew.

[50:05] As far as I can tell, he has appeared in one movie, and there's a funeral for him,

[50:09] but only in the extended version of the movie that he's in.

[50:13] Fuck.

[50:14] Okay.

S7

[50:18] That's going to be...

Elliott Kalan

[50:25] And Dan, if you're able to steal this, I'll give you 100 points.

[50:29] What's the actor's name again?

[50:31] Harris Howe Strew.

[50:33] Oh, fuck.

[50:36] Oh, no.

[50:37] Oh, no.

[50:38] But only in the extended version of the movie.

[50:40] It's not in the theatrical release.

Stuart Wellington

[50:41] No, I know.

[50:42] I know.

[50:43] I know.

[50:43] It's fine.

[50:45] Ah, fuck.

[50:46] Ah.

[50:47] Yeah.

[50:48] No, yeah.

[50:49] I can do this.

[50:50] Yeah, I can do it.

[50:51] You can do it, Stu.

[50:52] You can do this.

[50:53] I've done hard things before.

[50:56] I can do this.

[50:57] This is not...

[50:57] You can do this.

[50:58] I've seen you do hard things.

Elliott Kalan

[50:59] The prizes are glittering.

[51:01] It's victory in this bullshit game that means nothing.

[51:05] It means being known forever as the T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W champion.

[51:16] Uh, I don't know.

Stuart Wellington

[51:18] Like, the Hobbit Battle of the Five Armies.

[51:21] Oh, so close.

Dan McCoy

[51:22] So close.

[51:23] Dan, do you want to steal?

[51:24] I mean, as long as it doesn't take any points away from me, I don't want to risk my insured victory.

[51:31] But if it's...

[51:33] Sounds like a coward's answer.

[51:36] My guess...

[51:37] This is a pure guess.

[51:40] The Zack Snyder cut of Justice League.

Elliott Kalan

[51:43] Oh, no.

[51:44] You were way off.

[51:45] Stuart, you were in much better territory.

[51:47] It was in Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers.

[51:50] Wow.

[51:50] So close.

[51:52] He plays the character of Theodred, Prince of Rohan, son of King Sioden.

[51:57] In the theatrical cut, the king only finds out his son has died, but in the extended edition, he gets a funeral.

Dan McCoy

[52:05] Parents should have to bury their child.

[52:08] I think that is worth a tie.

[52:10] I think that Stuart came so close that that is a tie on this game.

Elliott Kalan

[52:14] You did come really close.

[52:15] You did come really close.

Stuart Wellington

[52:16] I'm going to give you five good job bucks, which ties things up.

[52:20] I'm so excited.

[52:21] You can see the years lift off my body, much like the years lifted off Theoden's body when Saruman's fell magics were pulled from him by Gandalf.

Elliott Kalan

[52:32] Well, you both played a great game.

[52:34] This has been a fantastic episode of T-F-H-A-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W.

[52:42] One of the best ever.

[52:44] I think maybe it's up there.

[52:46] And certainly when we put out our annual best of T-F-H-I-T-A-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W, we are going to – yeah, when we update it every year with the new clips.

[52:59] There's definitely going to be some in this.

[53:00] So thank you so much for playing, Dan and Stuart.

[53:03] Thank you.

[53:03] Thank you to everyone out there for listening.

[53:06] Thank you to whoever invented marriage because you know what?

[53:08] It may have started as a way of treating women as property and cementing the bonds between royal houses, but it's turned into a really beautiful way for two or more people to share their lives together.

[53:18] And that's really something.

[53:20] So let's thank everybody out there who's ever felt love, those who are searching for love, and those who need love because we all need each of those people.

[53:29] Maybe one or two of them are a little extraneous, but I'm not the one to judge.

[53:32] Who can tell?

[53:33] That's for God to know.

[53:35] Yeah, a couple of them can go away.

[53:37] I mean, there's a lot of people.

[53:39] I'm sure not all of them are necessary for the functioning of the world.

[53:42] But I can't choose which, so let's let everybody stay.

[53:45] Just write some names in your death note, Elliot.

[53:47] Who cares?

[53:48] I forgot I have this death note, and I never use it.

[53:50] I should really use it more often.

[53:52] I got you that for your birthday.

[53:54] I want to thank Alex for producing and editing this.

[53:58] I want to thank everyone at MaxFun.

[54:00] There's lots of other great MaxFun shows out there, so please take a listen and enjoy them.

[54:07] And from all of us here at T-F-H-I-T-A-W-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-B-A-A-T-W, thank you.

[54:16] Good night.

[54:17] Stay tuned next week to this channel, this space.

Elliott Kalan

[54:21] For another episode of La Flophouse, where we'll be watching a movie and talking about it.

[54:25] But until then, this is me with the classic T-F-H-I-T-A-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-B-A-A-T-W.

[54:34] Sign off.

[54:35] Hey, America.

[54:36] Keep on.

[54:36] T-F-H-I-T-A-W-N-M-A-M-T-A-B-I-T-C-M-T-A-B-T-P-A-A-T-W-ing.

[54:49] MaximumFun.org.

Dan McCoy

[54:50] Comedy and culture.

[54:52] Artist owned.

[54:53] Audience supported.

FH Mini 62- The Long-Awaited Wedding Episode

Transcript

In this episode

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