Ep #383 - The Munsters, with Kevin Maher

Stuart Wellington

[0:00] On this episode, we discuss The Monsters.

[0:03] A silly movie perfect for nonstop nut November.

[0:08] What?

Elliott Kalan

[0:10] Hold on.

[0:12] Is that a thing?

Stuart Wellington

[0:13] Yeah, you watch a bunch of nutty movies.

[0:15] Oh, okay.

Elliott Kalan

[0:16] Look, you promised a hot one and you delivered.

[0:30] Hey, everyone, and welcome to The Flophouse.

Dan McCoy

[0:43] I'm Dan McCoy.

Elliott Kalan

[0:44] Hey, I'm Stuart Wellington.

[0:46] Hey, I'm Elliot Kalin.

[0:47] We've got a very special guest today for No Nonsense November.

[0:51] That's right.

[0:52] No nonsense, everybody.

[0:53] We're just doing what we're supposed to do.

[0:55] Minimum of nonsense.

[0:56] And joining us to help us with that is, uh-oh,

[0:59] Mr. Nonsense himself.

[1:01] No, just kidding.

[1:01] It's Kevin Marr, one of the friends of the show

[1:04] and one of the great, great, great pop culture presenters

[1:07] of New York City.

[1:10] There's not exactly a succinct way of describing what Kevin does,

[1:13] but he's the absolute best at doing it.

Dan McCoy

[1:14] There's a show called Kevin Geeks Out that he has done for a long time

[1:18] that if you like the presentations we do at our live shows,

[1:23] the PowerPoints about silly things,

[1:26] you would like this show,

[1:28] and you would actually probably learn something unlike at our show.

[1:32] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:32] Yeah.

[1:33] I was, when I lived in New York,

[1:35] I was a long time attendee of these shows

[1:37] and I was always inspired by them.

[1:39] I always thought they were fantastic.

[1:41] And you can get a taste of them actually online.

[1:44] There's some of them up.

[1:45] I'm a big fan of Kevin's dealing with the trauma of Vietnam

[1:48] through 80s detective show presentation.

[1:52] But he's here to promote his new book,

[1:54] Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

[1:57] Oh, he's holding up a copy.

[1:58] He's holding it there for the viewers at home who don't exist.

[2:02] Oh, and the maiden out of New York.

[2:04] It's funny.

[2:05] He's doing all these physical things and not talking at all,

Dan McCoy

[2:10] which is a weird choice.

[2:11] I'm waiting for it to be done.

[2:14] No, please, interrupt him.

[2:15] You can't.

[2:15] It was a lot, no.

[2:16] I wait for this kind of positive feedback.

[2:17] You're showing Elliot the sort of respect.

[2:18] I'm finally going to get it.

[2:18] I'm not going to interrupt it.

[2:20] He will not afford you.

[2:22] I'm saying I'm sharing the shelf with the maniac of New York,

Elliott Kalan

[2:27] with the maniac of North Pole.

[2:30] I just want to say this, bookstores,

[2:31] you should stock both of these books.

[2:33] Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

[2:34] And Mania of New York, don't put them on the same shelf.

[2:35] They really shouldn't go on the same shelf.

[2:38] One is kind of a seasonal humor, all ages book.

[2:43] Yeah, all ages.

[2:44] And the other is a non-seasonal horror satire

[2:47] that is not for all ages,

[2:49] unless your kids are totally twisted.

[2:50] What are you, Cormac McCarthy or something?

[2:52] Oh, shit.

Stuart Wellington

[2:53] Yeah, baby Cormac?

[2:54] Yeah, he's a messed up little dude.

Elliott Kalan

[2:56] Maybe if you're buying presents for Cormac McCarthy,

[2:59] age seven, he'll like maniac of New York.

[3:00] What, Maridio?

[3:02] But Kevin, thank you so much for joining us today.

[3:05] My pleasure.

S4

[3:05] I'm glad I could have an excuse

[3:08] to watch The Munsters the second time.

[3:10] Oh, God.

[3:11] Wow.

Dan McCoy

[3:12] Ooh, lucky boy.

[3:14] Before we get into it, I do want to ask,

[3:16] like, what...

Elliott Kalan

[3:17] Why did you watch The Munsters the first time?

[3:19] That was the question you were going to ask?

[3:20] Well, we'll get asked that question.

Dan McCoy

[3:21] Because it's got monsters in it.

[3:22] But I wanted to ask all of you

[3:23] what your history with The Munsters is, if anything.

[3:27] Cool.

[3:27] That's a good question.

[3:28] I was going to ask the same question.

Elliott Kalan

[3:30] That's a good question.

[3:31] I mean, I'm happy to go first.

[3:32] Yeah, sure.

[3:32] Because I'm always happy to go first.

[3:34] As a kid, I never really liked The Munsters.

[3:36] I was...

[3:37] In my mind, for some reason,

[3:38] there had to be a rivalry

[3:39] between The Addams Family Show

[3:40] and The Munsters Show.

[3:42] I would watch both of them

[3:43] and Nick at Night

[3:43] because I was not old enough

[3:44] to watch them when they originally aired.

[3:46] But I'd watch them on Nick at Night

[3:47] and I found The Addams Family Show

[3:48] so much funnier.

[3:49] And I was also a little insulted

[3:50] at the idea that the Munsters monsters,

[3:52] the Universal monsters,

[3:54] were being treated so cavalierly.

[3:55] Now I'm not quite as much

[3:57] of an extremist about that.

[3:58] But as a kid, I was like,

[3:59] they're supposed to be scary.

[4:00] They're not silly.

[4:02] They should be scary.

Stuart Wellington

[4:03] Yeah.

[4:03] Stuart?

[4:04] Yeah.

[4:05] I mean, as a kid,

[4:06] I feel like I caught reruns

[4:09] on Nick at Night

[4:09] and I loved it.

[4:10] Like, I loved The Munsters.

[4:12] Not for any particular,

[4:13] like, anything about the characters.

[4:15] I think I just loved

[4:16] seeing monsters doing stuff.

[4:18] I feel like,

[4:19] I probably talked about this

[4:20] on air before,

[4:21] but I remember as a kid,

[4:22] I read this series of books

[4:23] what, I cannot remember the name,

[4:25] but it was a series of books

[4:26] of, like, little kid monsters

[4:28] that are, like,

[4:29] going to school and shit.

[4:30] And I loved it.

[4:31] Like, give me that stuff.

[4:32] And The Munsters,

[4:33] unlike The Addams Family,

[4:34] actually look like

[4:35] Universal Monsters.

[4:36] That's true.

Elliott Kalan

[4:37] I think one of the reasons

[4:38] I liked The Addams Family

[4:38] was they seemed a little

[4:39] creepier to me

[4:40] because they were not a thing

[4:41] that I could easily pigeonhole.

[4:43] It was like,

[4:43] I couldn't quite put a finger

[4:44] on why Gomez and Mortician Wednesday

[4:46] seemed weird or creepy.

[4:48] But with The Munsters,

[4:49] it was like,

[4:49] yeah, it's a Frankenstein.

[4:50] But wait a minute,

[4:51] Frankenstein plus a Dracula

[4:52] equals a Wolfman?

[4:53] What kind of genetics is this?

[4:55] Calling Dr. Mendel,

[4:57] what's going on here?

Dan McCoy

[4:58] I'll afford Kevin the honor

[5:00] of going last,

[5:01] but I just,

[5:01] I never really watched,

[5:02] the honor of getting

[5:04] to speak last.

[5:06] Yeah.

[5:07] What he said.

[5:08] Yeah.

[5:09] No, I mean,

[5:09] I like,

[5:11] yeah,

[5:11] when I was growing up,

[5:12] The Munsters was

[5:13] in syndication a lot.

[5:15] I would happen upon it.

[5:17] I would always think like,

[5:18] oh, I'm going to like this

[5:19] because it's got monsters in it.

[5:20] And I did like

[5:21] Fred Gwynn.

[5:24] you know,

[5:25] he's great.

[5:26] Yes.

[5:26] But yeah,

[5:27] my cousin Vinny's Fred Gwynn.

[5:28] Yeah.

[5:28] But I,

[5:29] in general,

[5:30] even as a child,

[5:31] I was like,

[5:32] hmm,

[5:32] a bunch of monsters

[5:33] in suburbia.

[5:35] This seems like a pretty

[5:36] thin premise.

[5:37] Like,

[5:38] how are you going to extend this?

[5:41] Because it was all just like,

[5:42] oh,

[5:42] a clash,

[5:43] like a clash between

[5:44] these two things,

[5:45] fish out of water.

[5:46] And it wasn't really for me.

[5:49] I wanted it to be funnier.

[5:50] But Kevin,

[5:51] what do you have to say?

[5:52] I love the idea of

Elliott Kalan

[5:52] little kid Dan watching

[5:53] and going,

[5:54] hmm,

[5:54] I don't think it has legs.

[5:56] Yeah.

[5:56] Kevin,

[5:56] what about you?

S4

[5:57] Same thing.

[5:58] Latchkey kid

[5:59] grew up watching a ton of TV,

[6:01] could not watch,

[6:02] watch The Munsters,

[6:04] no doubt,

[6:05] could not tell you

[6:07] a plot

[6:08] or a detail

[6:09] from The Munsters

Stuart Wellington

[6:10] for the life of me.

S4

[6:11] Yeah.

[6:11] Like,

[6:11] even though I watched

[6:12] a ton of it,

[6:12] it just didn't make

[6:13] an impression

[6:14] beyond its premise.

[6:16] So,

[6:17] I,

[6:18] I don't have

[6:19] any particular fondness

[6:20] for it.

[6:21] And I,

[6:21] today,

[6:22] I,

[6:22] I lump it in

[6:23] with stuff like

[6:24] Speed Racer

[6:25] where I get

[6:27] that there are

[6:28] boomers and people

[6:29] who have a affinity

[6:30] and a nostalgia for it

[6:32] and it just,

[6:32] it means nothing to me.

[6:34] But I'm aware of it.

[6:36] It means nothing.

Elliott Kalan

[6:38] Yeah,

[6:38] it,

[6:38] it's what,

[6:38] there's this,

[6:39] I feel like there's a

[6:39] memory sink,

[6:40] there's certain things

[6:41] I remember so well

[6:42] from when I was a kid

[6:43] that I watched

[6:43] and there's other things

[6:45] that have just disappeared.

[6:46] It's like,

[6:46] I know I watched a ton of

[6:47] He-Man when I was a kid

[6:48] and I remember none

[6:49] of the plots,

[6:50] I barely remember the characters.

Stuart Wellington

[6:51] I remember my,

[6:52] watching my parents

[6:53] get in this huge fight

[6:53] this one time.

Elliott Kalan

[6:55] Yeah,

[6:55] that kind of,

[6:56] I mean,

[6:56] that kind of stuff

[6:56] I remember very well.

[6:57] It just burned into my brain

Stuart Wellington

[6:58] more than The Munsters

[6:58] for some reason.

Elliott Kalan

[6:59] Do I remember,

[7:00] do I remember exactly

[7:00] what I was looking at

[7:02] when I was 10 years old

[7:03] and on a vacation

[7:04] in California with my family

[7:05] and I realized my parents

[7:06] would get divorced someday

[7:07] based on their behavior?

[7:08] Yes,

[7:08] I remember that very clearly.

Stuart Wellington

[7:09] And that had a bigger impact

[7:11] than The Munsters,

[7:12] a movie about monsters

[7:13] living in suburbia.

Elliott Kalan

[7:14] Somehow that had a bigger impact

[7:15] than the TV show,

[7:16] The Munsters.

[7:16] Yeah,

[7:17] yeah,

[7:17] I don't know.

[7:17] But The Munsters.

[7:18] Because I assumed,

[7:19] The Mustards.

[7:20] Sorry,

[7:21] The Mustards?

[7:22] I said it right.

[7:24] It sounded like you said,

[7:25] I just know you love mustard

[7:26] and so I thought you were

[7:27] talking about The Mustards,

[7:28] the show about a family

[7:29] of condiments

[7:29] that live in suburbia

[7:30] and I think it's weird

[7:31] that the regular people

[7:32] are not on hot dogs.

[7:34] The Dead.

[7:35] The Dead.

Dan McCoy

[7:36] Now this has legs.

[7:37] Yeah,

[7:37] yeah,

Elliott Kalan

[7:38] the Dead is golden mustard.

[7:39] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[7:40] Yeah,

[7:40] yeah.

[7:40] And then they've got

[7:41] Crazy Cousin Spicy Mustard.

Stuart Wellington

[7:43] The Mustard Mustard.

[7:44] That's what they call

[7:45] their cast list.

[7:46] Yeah,

[7:46] yeah.

Dan McCoy

[7:47] Fridge Cousin,

[7:48] Dijon Mustard.

[7:49] Anyway,

[7:49] no,

[7:52] like Rob Zombie.

[7:53] More mustard jokes,

[7:54] Dan.

[7:55] Tell us more mustards,

[7:56] you know.

[7:56] Unlike us,

[7:57] Rob Zombie clearly

[7:58] loved The Munsters.

[8:01] was nutty about

[8:03] The Munsters,

[8:03] which is odd though

[8:04] because this movie

[8:05] that he made

[8:06] about The Munsters

[8:07] only introduces

[8:08] the premise of The Munsters

[8:09] about half an hour

[8:10] before it's over.

Elliott Kalan

[8:13] It's a movie,

[8:14] it's,

[8:15] so Rob Zombie,

[8:15] this was a real

[8:16] passion project.

[8:17] He's been trying to do this

[8:18] for years.

[8:18] Yeah.

[8:19] He's been trying to make

[8:19] a Munsters movie,

[8:20] which,

[8:21] the closest thing

[8:23] I compare it to

[8:23] is Terry Gilliam's

[8:24] desire to make

[8:25] a Don Quixote movie

[8:26] and being thwarted

[8:27] at every step of the way.

Dan McCoy

[8:28] With a similar success

[8:30] at the end of the road.

[8:31] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[8:31] I never,

[8:32] it's so,

[8:33] I still have not seen

[8:34] that Don Quixote movie

[8:35] and never,

[8:36] it's so crazy to me

[8:36] that for years

[8:37] I was hoping for its release

[8:39] and I watched a documentary

[8:40] about how it would

[8:41] never get made.

[8:42] And then when the movie

[8:42] finally got made

[8:43] and was available for free

[8:44] on Tubi,

[8:45] I think I was like,

[8:46] I'll get around to it.

[8:46] Yeah.

[8:47] I'll get around to it.

[8:47] Who cares?

[8:48] By that time,

[8:49] our fondness for Terry Gilliam

[8:51] had tanked,

[8:52] I think.

[8:52] Yeah.

[8:53] It dissipated somewhat.

[8:54] But it was like,

[8:54] this was more fun

[8:55] as a movie

[8:55] that would never get made.

[8:56] Yeah.

[8:57] But he wanted to do this

[8:58] for years

[8:59] and it is strange

[8:59] that it's essentially

[9:00] a prequel

[9:01] for the monsters

Stuart Wellington

[9:02] which is a weird...

[9:04] Like a franchise setup.

[9:06] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[9:07] To spin off,

[9:08] I guess,

[9:08] a new show

[9:08] or a new series

[9:09] of movies.

[9:10] But it's like,

[9:11] it feels like a premise

[9:12] that doesn't really need

[9:13] much of an explainer.

[9:14] I will say that,

[9:15] like,

Dan McCoy

[9:16] while this whole movie

[9:18] is fairly leaden

[9:20] in its pacing,

[9:22] I find the last part

[9:25] where their actual

[9:25] fish out of water

[9:26] the least interesting

[9:27] of it.

[9:28] So maybe Rob Zombie

[9:29] was right about his own,

[9:31] like the version

[9:31] of the monsters

[9:32] that he was going to make.

Elliott Kalan

[9:34] I mean,

[9:34] there's a real,

[9:35] there's a real kind of

[9:36] cartoony,

[9:36] kind of Pee-wee's Playhouse

[9:37] visual flair

[9:38] to it.

[9:39] I mean,

[9:40] the bad side of that

[9:41] is it's a movie

[9:42] that is shot

[9:42] as if it was

[9:43] a Fox live action

[9:44] Saturday morning show

[9:44] from the 90s.

[9:45] Like,

[9:45] it looks,

[9:46] you know,

[9:46] it's a lot of bright

[9:48] neon colors

[9:48] and it's overlit

[9:49] and things like that.

[9:50] But it has a look to it

[9:51] and then they get

[9:52] to the suburbs

[9:52] and suddenly,

[9:53] yeah,

[9:53] it's kind of dull

[9:54] and it doesn't look

[9:55] that great

[9:55] and for some reason

[9:57] they decide to take

[9:58] Cassandra Peterson

[9:59] and slather her

[10:00] with witch makeup

[10:01] for almost all

[10:01] of her scenes

[10:02] which is bonkers.

Dan McCoy

[10:04] Why would you do that?

[10:05] But let's,

[10:07] I mean,

[10:07] we've laid enough groundwork,

[10:09] let's get into this movie

[10:10] which is,

Elliott Kalan

[10:11] Do you feel like

[10:12] we need to explain

[10:13] the premise of the monsters

[10:13] for any Gen Z kids

[10:15] that are listening?

Dan McCoy

[10:16] It's a bunch of monsters.

[10:18] They live in

[10:18] like a normal

[10:20] like suburb.

[10:22] That's the TV show.

[10:24] They begin in Transylvania.

[10:26] Well,

Dan McCoy

[10:26] no,

[10:27] the premise of the monsters,

[10:29] I thought that was

[10:29] what Elliot was talking about.

[10:30] Yeah,

[10:31] yeah,

[10:31] yeah.

[10:31] Let's just get to this.

[10:32] I mean,

[10:33] there was a normal cousin

[10:35] or something

[10:36] that's not in this film.

[10:37] She's beautiful.

[10:38] I don't like the use

Elliott Kalan

[10:39] of the word normal

[10:39] but yeah,

[10:40] there was a non-monster cousin.

S4

[10:42] Sure.

[10:42] Okay.

[10:43] Anyway.

[10:43] I believe they called her,

[10:44] on the original series,

[10:46] I believe they called her

[10:46] the white sheep

[10:47] of the family.

[10:49] Because that was

[10:50] the kind of jokes

[10:50] the original sitcom

[10:51] would use all the time.

[10:53] Like this familiar cliche,

[10:54] we've flipped it

[10:55] because we're monsters.

[10:57] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[10:57] I'll be like,

[10:58] that's the way

[10:58] the corpse crumbles.

[11:00] You know,

[11:00] it's like,

[11:01] it was,

[11:01] I think maybe that was

[11:03] part of the difference

[11:03] with Adam's Family.

[11:04] There was a little bit of that

[11:05] but there was also like,

[11:06] just this,

[11:07] they were,

[11:07] they're super enthusiasm

[11:09] for everything about the world

[11:10] that Gomez and Morticia had

[11:12] and like,

[11:13] Wednesday had her own bit

[11:14] and they,

[11:14] and you know,

[11:15] Fester is a horrible nightmare

[11:17] of a man.

[11:17] Just like a cackling,

[11:19] you know,

[11:20] bizarre creature.

[11:21] And the monsters,

[11:21] it would be like,

[11:22] hmm,

[11:23] like,

[11:24] are you doing okay

[11:25] in spelling class?

[11:27] Aw,

[11:27] geez,

[11:28] we don't cast any spells in it.

[11:30] Well,

[11:30] I'll talk to the teacher about it.

[11:32] Like,

[11:32] that's the kind of joke

[11:32] they would do.

[11:33] Anyway.

Dan McCoy

[11:34] Anyway,

[11:34] so,

[11:34] um,

[11:35] the movie begins

[11:36] at,

[11:37] during an indeterminate time period.

[11:39] We're in Transylvania.

[11:40] At the beginning of the movie,

[11:41] I thought,

[11:42] okay,

[11:42] we're in the past,

[11:43] uh,

[11:44] but because of,

[11:45] like,

[11:45] the lanterns they were using,

[11:47] but,

[11:47] and then later on,

[11:48] it seems like we're in maybe

[11:50] the 50s when the Munster,

[11:51] or 60s when the Munsters were set

[11:54] due to the,

[11:54] like,

[11:55] the TV sets they're using.

[11:56] But then,

[11:56] at one point,

[11:57] uh,

[11:58] uh,

[11:58] Herman Munster does a,

[12:00] a Clint Eastwood and Dirty Harry impression

[12:02] that really spun me out

[12:05] in terms of,

[12:05] like,

[12:05] when are we supposed to be?

[12:06] It doesn't hold together.

Elliott Kalan

[12:08] I think this,

[12:09] so let's,

[12:09] so we're gonna put together

[12:10] what I call a fatal flaw list.

[12:11] And the first fatal flaw,

[12:13] Munster's movie,

[12:14] where in history do you take place?

[12:16] This is a major issue

[12:17] that has to be dealt with.

[12:19] Dan,

[12:19] I think they just live in,

[12:20] kind of like,

[12:20] cartoon time.

[12:21] Yeah,

[12:21] they live in a cartoon Transylvania.

[12:23] Uh,

[12:24] but it is disorienting that,

[12:25] like,

[12:25] yeah,

[12:26] that he is,

[12:27] he,

[12:27] that the,

[12:27] the scientist is,

[12:28] like,

[12:29] using lanterns on a,

[12:30] on a horse and carriage.

[12:31] Yes.

[12:31] And then suddenly there,

[12:32] and then suddenly,

[12:32] uh,

[12:33] Herman Munster is a rock and roll star.

[12:34] It's like,

[12:34] what is this,

[12:35] Liz Damania?

[12:36] What's going on around here?

[12:37] What is this,

[12:38] Greaser's Palace?

[12:39] Come on,

[12:39] I need,

[12:40] I need to know what time this is.

Dan McCoy

[12:42] But,

[12:42] uh,

[12:42] we see a couple of grave robbers.

[12:44] Uh,

[12:45] it's a real,

[12:45] um,

[12:46] a real,

[12:47] uh,

[12:47] Dr.

[12:48] Frankenstein and his assistant,

[12:50] uh,

[12:51] situation.

[12:53] Um,

[12:53] and later on,

[12:54] I,

[12:54] I took me a surprising amount of time

[12:56] to recognize that the assistant is played by,

[12:58] uh,

[13:00] Jorge Garcia from Lost.

[13:02] Yeah,

[13:02] from Lost.

[13:02] Hurley.

[13:03] Yeah.

[13:03] Uh,

[13:04] Who's pretty funny in this?

Elliott Kalan

[13:06] I gotta,

[13:07] hey,

[13:07] he,

[13:07] he's got one of the better performances.

[13:09] Right off the bat,

Dan McCoy

[13:10] I'm going to say that I think that the performances are not the problem with this movie.

[13:13] I think.

[13:14] No,

[13:14] no,

[13:14] everyone's,

Elliott Kalan

[13:15] everyone's doing fine and they're,

[13:16] they're delivering them at the tone that they need to for the material and things like that.

[13:20] You know,

[13:20] like this is,

[13:21] everyone's kind of doing kind of,

[13:23] kind of Borscht Belty type delivery and stuff,

[13:25] which is,

[13:26] I guess the way you got to go.

S4

[13:27] I would describe it as elevated.

[13:29] Yeah.

[13:29] But,

[13:30] but I think even,

[13:31] even,

[13:31] even with that in mind.

[13:32] So you'd call this elevated horror?

[13:34] The Munsters.

[13:35] A24s,

[13:36] the Munsters.

[13:39] I think even with the elevated performances,

[13:41] there's a lot of freedom being granted to people who are not being measured against a 1960s sitcom cast.

[13:47] But like,

[13:48] you know what grandpa talks like and sounds like.

[13:51] You have an expectation for Lily,

[13:53] for Herman.

[13:53] When you introduce new characters,

[13:55] they're free to interpret the character however they want.

[13:59] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[13:59] Yeah.

[13:59] And yeah,

[14:00] with,

[14:00] with varying degrees of success.

Elliott Kalan

[14:03] since we have.

[14:04] I mean,

[14:04] I like,

[14:05] I like,

[14:05] I like the,

[14:05] I like the guy who's performing as,

[14:07] as the mad scientist doctor too.

[14:09] But I.

Stuart Wellington

[14:10] Recently seen in Barbarian as a guy with some kind of crazy ideas.

[14:14] Oh,

[14:14] that's right.

[14:14] I forgot he's also from Barbarian.

[14:15] Wow.

[14:16] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[14:16] Yeah.

[14:16] But I'm,

[14:17] I'm a big fan of any villain character who's like that kind of Captain Hook type.

[14:21] Well,

[14:22] oh,

[14:22] over here.

[14:23] I'm a big fan of,

[14:24] of melodramatic,

[14:26] slightly effeminate villains.

[14:27] I like,

[14:27] I find them to be the most fun.

Stuart Wellington

[14:29] There's a scene where Jorge Garcia is trying to commiserate with Herman Munster.

[14:34] And he's,

[14:35] he's like trying to,

[14:37] he's bad talking Lily Munster or,

[14:39] you know,

[14:40] Lily.

[14:40] And he gets some new information.

[14:43] He's like,

[14:43] blah,

[14:44] blah,

[14:44] blah.

[14:45] What?

[14:45] And it was such a perfect take.

[14:47] I was like,

[14:47] I haven't seen this in real life ever before.

[14:51] This is the most cartoony thing I've ever seen.

[14:54] Yeah.

[14:54] No,

Dan McCoy

[14:54] I think I remember the moment you're talking about.

[14:56] It is very fun.

[14:57] Anyway,

[14:58] so these grave robbers are trying to break into a cough,

[15:01] coffin and a,

[15:04] what I've described in my notes is a fancy zombie.

[15:07] Here's the noise.

Elliott Kalan

[15:08] This was a confusing way to open the movie.

[15:11] They make a big deal out of this zombie character.

[15:14] Who's not really a character in the movie.

[15:16] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[15:16] He turns to the camera.

[15:17] We get the title,

[15:18] the Munsters,

[15:19] in case you're confused.

[15:20] You thought you clicked on,

[15:22] I don't know,

[15:22] some other squid game.

[15:23] Kill them wild on Netflix or whatever.

Elliott Kalan

[15:26] You thought this was love at first,

[15:28] love is blind?

[15:29] Yeah.

[15:29] And you saw the zombie,

[15:31] you went,

[15:31] oh,

[15:31] I hope love is blind.

[15:32] Oh.

Dan McCoy

[15:33] And the zombie comes into the crypt,

[15:35] starts talking to them.

[15:36] They seem really unconcerned by the fact that the zombie is chatting with them.

[15:41] They just kill him right off

[15:42] and take a picture with the corpse

[15:44] and then cart the body off.

[15:46] Because he's a famous zombie.

[15:47] Yeah.

[15:47] He's a famous zombie.

[15:48] He's the piano playing zombie,

[15:50] right?

[15:51] They want his piano hands.

[15:52] Yeah,

[15:52] he's a famous

[15:52] piano hands.

Stuart Wellington

[15:53] So they take his hands.

[15:56] Because they're making like a serpentor or something.

[15:58] Yeah,

[15:58] yeah,

[15:58] something like that.

Elliott Kalan

[15:59] Cut to a castle.

[16:01] The idea that the talent exists in the body part and not in the brain,

[16:05] much as in the Peter Lorre film Mad Love,

[16:07] in which the hands of a murderous knife thrower give you murderous knife throwing abilities.

Stuart Wellington

[16:12] Or like in the Jeff Fahey movie Body Parts,

[16:15] where he gets a serial killer's arm.

[16:17] That's really talented.

[16:17] And that makes him a serial killer.

[16:18] Yes,

Elliott Kalan

[16:19] exactly.

[16:19] And I have to assume in the movie Edward Penis Hands,

[16:21] I've never actually seen it,

[16:22] but I have to assume something along the same lines.

Dan McCoy

[16:26] Anyway,

[16:26] we cut to the castle.

[16:27] We meet our first main cast member of the Munsters, Grandpa Munster,

[16:32] who rises up from his coffin,

[16:34] does a dramatic-

[16:35] Whose last name is not Munster.

S4

[16:37] Right.

[16:38] No.

[16:38] It's Herman Munster,

[16:39] but when his daughter marries Herman,

[16:43] I guess for simplicity's sake,

[16:44] he takes that husband's name as well.

[16:47] Transylvania custom.

[16:47] Yeah,

[16:47] old vampire custom.

[16:48] Transylvania custom.

[16:49] Yeah,

[16:49] yeah.

Dan McCoy

[16:50] He does one of those spooky,

[16:52] like,

[16:53] rising up out of the coffin Dracula things,

[16:58] does a little pose,

[16:58] and throws us back out.

[17:00] So we're introduced then to his assistant,

[17:02] Igor,

[17:03] played by Sylvester McCoy,

[17:05] one of the many doctors from Doctor Who.

[17:07] Stuart knows him as Radagast from-

[17:10] I do know him as Radagast.

[17:12] Thank you, Dan.

[17:14] And Dan,

[17:14] is he related to you?

[17:15] No,

[17:16] not that I know of.

[17:16] I mean,

[17:17] I haven't done the legwork to find that out.

[17:20] 23andMe,

[17:21] yeah.

[17:21] But he cracks us back,

[17:23] and Grandpa is very interested in his daughter Lily's love life.

[17:27] She's lonely,

[17:28] so she sets him up with Orlok,

[17:30] who looks like Orlok from Nosferatu,

[17:34] a good-

[17:34] I mean,

[17:35] all of the-

[17:36] As Elliot says,

[17:37] it's a little over-lit,

[17:39] maybe for what it is,

[17:40] a little flat,

[17:40] but the production design is really pretty.

[17:43] That's the reason to watch this movie.

[17:45] Everything looks like an old horror movie

[17:50] where part of the charm is,

[17:52] it looks a little cardboardy,

[17:54] and there's a bunch of beautiful colored lights thrown up on everything.

[17:59] It's good.

[17:59] I also-

[18:00] I remind myself-

[18:00] It's all physical.

[18:01] It's all physical sets.

Elliott Kalan

[18:02] And while watching this,

[18:03] I remind myself,

[18:04] this is essentially probably for children.

[18:06] It's not really because the content is not for children,

[18:09] but a Munsters movie should be a thing you can watch with children,

[18:12] so it shouldn't be too dark and too scary.

[18:14] So it's okay for it to be lit.

[18:15] It's wrong for me to come to a Munsters movie and be like,

[18:18] it's not genuinely scary.

[18:20] It's not nightmare fuel.

S4

[18:23] Yeah.

[18:23] It feels like an old 1930s monster movie put through the filter of a 1990s made-for-cable Canadian kids show.

[18:31] Yeah.

[18:32] Yeah.

[18:32] Exactly.

[18:33] Perfect.

[18:33] At production value.

Elliott Kalan

[18:34] I think that was the original pitch.

[18:36] Yeah.

[18:38] Bullseye.

Stuart Wellington

[18:40] And Lily is played by Sherry Moon Zombie, Rob Zombie's wife.

[18:44] And again, Rob Zombie proves to the world he is a number one wife guy,

[18:48] and that she is fucking great in this.

[18:51] Like, she is good in most of the things he has put her in,

[18:54] but she is-

[18:55] I think she is genuinely, like, very charming and cute,

[18:58] and she pitches it at the exact, like,

[19:00] you might not agree with the choice to pitch her at that level,

[19:03] but she nails it.

[19:05] She does what she's supposed to do perfectly.

Elliott Kalan

[19:07] I mean, I think if she was given funny jokes to say-

[19:10] Yes.

[19:10] It would be, she'd knock them out of the park.

[19:11] Yeah, I think the issue-

[19:12] It's not her delivery.

[19:14] Her delivery's great.

[19:14] The issue with me, the movie, is just that it's like,

[19:16] as you'll find out as you listen to more of Dan's summary,

[19:19] is that it's kind of less a movie,

[19:21] and it's almost like we did that biopic,

[19:23] that non-Celine Dion biopic,

[19:25] where it was just, like, not a story so much as just

[19:27] dramatizing every moment in Celine Dion's life,

[19:30] and this is kind of like that, but for the Munsters.

[19:33] So it's like a weird thing where you're like,

[19:35] we gotta be true to the story.

[19:37] We can't just make up a fictional tale.

[19:39] But these are not real people.

[19:40] Like, they're not, you might as well come with the plot.

[19:42] There is no thrust.

Dan McCoy

[19:43] There's no narrative thrust.

[19:44] Afterwards, Audrey asked me,

[19:45] what was the conflict in that film?

[19:46] I'm like, I don't know.

Elliott Kalan

[19:48] None.

[19:48] There was none.

[19:49] I mean, they deal with everything super easy.

[19:50] Just a bunch of Munsters hanging out.

[19:52] I mean, Dan, you texted us,

[19:54] while you were watching, I guess,

[19:55] you texted a comment that somebody,

[19:56] maybe you were gonna save this to later,

[19:58] a comment you had read online,

[19:59] where someone described it as, like,

[20:01] a porn Munsters parody without the sex scenes,

[20:03] and that is what it feels like.

[20:04] Like, it feels like you're watching

[20:06] the USA Up All Night version of the XXX,

[20:08] not the Munsters, porn parody.

Dan McCoy

[20:12] Yeah, exactly.

[20:14] But anyway, they have a date,

[20:16] Orlok and Lily,

[20:18] at the Boneyard Cafe,

[20:20] an Egyptian-themed cafe,

[20:23] and Orlok is not a great date.

[20:26] He, you know, he makes bad jokes.

[20:28] He's a good dancer.

Elliott Kalan

[20:29] He's really, yeah, he's a great dancer,

[20:31] and he's got, I mean,

[20:31] he's on the cutting edge of Euro.

[20:33] Well, that comes in a second.

[20:34] Don't get ahead of it.

Dan McCoy

[20:35] He's eating gross.

[20:38] He's showing pictures of rats,

[20:39] which for some reason she's put off by,

[20:41] even though she just said that she likes rats.

[20:44] Well, I think she was just saying that to be polite.

S4

[20:46] I think he's a bore is the point.

[20:49] The disconnect is not the rats.

[20:51] It's the guy going on and on

[20:52] and not asking a lot of questions.

Elliott Kalan

[20:54] And the subtext, of course,

[20:56] is that, as we all know,

[20:59] vampires are built on anti-Semitic tropes.

[21:02] Lily's family is obviously much more

[21:04] of a kind of assimilated

[21:05] German-Jewish vampire family,

[21:07] whereas Orlok is more of a,

[21:08] right off the boat,

[21:09] Eastern European Jewish vampire family.

[21:12] So there's a lot of subtext here

[21:13] in terms of the way

[21:14] different waves of Jewish immigration,

[21:16] again, as seen through anti-Semitic tropes

[21:18] of Jews being vampires,

[21:19] interacted with each other

[21:20] in the United States

[21:22] in the early parts of the 20th century.

[21:23] So there's a lot going on here.

[21:24] I really have to tip my hat

[21:25] to Rob Zombie for doing his research

[21:26] about the ways that happened.

Stuart Wellington

[21:29] And later on,

[21:30] when they run into Cassandra Peterson,

[21:32] who's dressed up like

[21:33] a traditional comic witch,

[21:34] that was also an anti-Semitic trope.

[21:37] Yes, yes, pretty much so.

[21:38] But she kind of welcomes them

[21:39] to the new world, America.

[21:40] So I think it continues along that theme.

Elliott Kalan

[21:42] Exactly.

[21:43] So I guess what we're saying

[21:44] is that Rob Zombie

[21:45] has created a real exploration

[21:46] of the anti-Semitic tropes of humor,

[21:49] of horror, sorry.

[21:50] Anti-Semitic tropes of horror.

[21:51] There are no anti-Semitic tropes

[21:51] in humor.

[21:52] Jews invent humor.

[21:53] There's the anti-Semitic tropes

[21:54] of horror through this sitcom.

[21:57] It's very subversive.

[21:59] And so Rob Zombie,

[21:59] I have to take the top

[22:00] of my head off to you

[22:01] because that's the kind of thing

[22:02] you would do in a horror movie.

Dan McCoy

[22:03] Speaking of racist tropes,

[22:05] we're now introduced to Lester,

[22:07] Cousin Lester,

[22:08] the werewolf character

[22:10] who is the one...

[22:12] Oh boy, this is a big misstep.

[22:14] The one black character

[22:15] of the movie who is like...

[22:19] I would not say...

[22:20] A dissolute gambler,

[22:21] I would say,

[22:21] is part of it.

[22:22] It's not wildly over the top,

[22:23] but it does play into

[22:25] a bunch of negative stereotypes.

Stuart Wellington

[22:26] It's fairly over the top.

[22:27] Yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[22:28] Yeah, he's the black sheep

[22:30] of the family.

[22:32] He's the gambler.

[22:33] He's like...

[22:34] Yeah, it's not great.

[22:36] And he's doing like

[22:38] a Frankenstein zombie walk

[22:41] toward a Romani fortune teller

[22:43] named Zoya

[22:43] who has drawn him in

[22:45] because he owes her money

[22:47] for some...

[22:49] She's loaned him.

[22:50] She's like a loan shark

[22:51] in this world, I guess.

[22:52] Yeah, she's a loan shark.

[22:54] She threatens to chop off his head

[22:55] and he calls...

[23:00] I guess his dad...

[23:01] I guess he's actually

[23:02] Grandpa's monster's son.

[23:03] It's...

[23:04] Whatever.

Stuart Wellington

[23:05] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[23:05] He's Grandpa Monster's son.

[23:07] He's Lily's brother.

Dan McCoy

[23:07] Yeah, he calls Grandpa

[23:08] and Grandpa's, you know,

[23:10] sitting around watching

[23:10] Abbott and Castello

[23:11] meet one of the

[23:13] Universal Monsters

[23:14] on TV.

[23:15] I think it's

[23:16] Dr. Jekyll and Mr.

[23:17] God.

[23:18] Thank you.

[23:19] See, this is why we have you one.

[23:20] This is the thing

[23:21] you can speak to.

[23:23] But he wants to sell Grandpa

[23:26] on the idea of selling

[23:28] the castle to Zoya

[23:29] and make it into a casino.

[23:32] Grandpa, you know,

[23:33] hangs up almost immediately.

[23:34] Meanwhile, back at the date,

[23:36] Orlok...

[23:37] Now, here's where the dancing

[23:38] comes in, Stu,

[23:38] that we were talking about.

[23:40] He takes around the corner

[23:41] and he's like,

[23:41] close your eyes.

[23:43] He's like, don't look.

[23:44] And he's like,

[23:44] okay, what's going to go on?

[23:46] And he stands under

[23:48] some neon,

[23:50] which is apparently

[23:51] a bias above the door

[23:52] to his house

[23:53] that says,

[23:54] if this tomb's a-rockin',

[23:55] don't come a-knockin'.

[23:56] And he does a little

[23:58] dance to some techno music.

Elliott Kalan

[24:00] And you've got to imagine

[24:01] that's an expensive

[24:02] neon sign to get.

[24:03] That's a lot of letters.

[24:04] A lot of letters, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[24:05] Maybe he took a class

[24:06] at, like, the Learning Annex

[24:07] to do neon.

Elliott Kalan

[24:09] Oh, really?

[24:09] Glass-blowing and neon

[24:10] ignition?

[24:12] Hey, you can do it.

[24:13] One of my business partners

Dan McCoy

[24:14] is doing it right now.

[24:16] But this is not,

[24:17] this erotic dance

[24:19] does not have the effect

[24:21] that he wants.

[24:21] She leaves.

[24:23] Date over.

[24:25] Back at the castle.

[24:26] Date over.

[24:27] Don't worry,

[24:27] we'll see him later.

Elliott Kalan

[24:29] Yeah, in case you were worried

[24:30] that was the end of

[24:30] Count Orlok's appearance

[24:32] in this.

[24:33] Don't worry,

[24:34] he gets to show up

[24:34] a bunch more times

[24:35] for no reason.

Dan McCoy

[24:37] Back at the castle,

[24:38] they're watching TV.

[24:39] There's a news flash

[24:40] that breaks in

[24:40] saying that comedian

[24:41] Shecky Von Rathbone

[24:44] was killed

[24:44] by an angry audience,

[24:46] which comes right

[24:47] on the heels

[24:47] that his brother,

[24:49] Shelly Van Rathbone,

[24:50] also died.

[24:52] Shelly was a super genius,

[24:54] unlike Shecky.

[24:55] They were both

[24:56] interred at the same place,

[24:58] but only,

[24:59] the newscaster says,

[25:00] only an idiot

[25:01] would confuse them.

[25:02] So, of course,

[25:03] we cut to an idiot,

[25:04] we cut to

[25:05] the grave robbers,

[25:07] and the assistant

[25:09] goes in

[25:09] to get

[25:10] the smart one,

[25:12] but of course,

[25:12] comes out

[25:12] with a dumb one.

[25:14] Classic

[25:15] Frankenstein bit.

Elliott Kalan

[25:17] Classic Frankenstein

[25:19] brain switch,

[25:19] you gotta do it,

[25:20] because otherwise,

[25:22] where's the plot?

[25:23] You don't have one.

[25:24] And this is what

[25:25] sets the entire plot

[25:26] in motion,

[25:26] this clockwork mechanism

S4

[25:28] that we call

[25:28] The Munsters 2022.

[25:30] While also answering

[25:31] the question for anybody

[25:33] who's ever watched

[25:34] The Munsters sitcom,

[25:35] how did Herman

[25:35] get to be that way?

[25:36] Yeah, we gotta know.

[25:37] Finally.

[25:38] Finally.

[25:39] Finally, we get it.

Elliott Kalan

[25:41] There's a number,

[25:41] I mean, I think,

[25:42] it didn't really dawn on me

[25:44] how over the top

[25:45] some of the explainers were

[25:46] until it explained

[25:47] how they got their pet

[25:48] later on in the movie.

[25:49] We'll get to that,

[25:50] where I was like,

[25:50] still didn't need it.

Stuart Wellington

[25:52] Still kind of like

[25:53] the origin for this.

Elliott Kalan

[25:55] I mean,

[25:56] it wasn't at the level of

[25:57] last name,

[25:58] I don't have one,

[25:58] I'm traveling alone.

[26:00] Solo.

[26:01] That's your last name now.

[26:03] Which again,

[26:03] is just again,

[26:04] it's the movie Solo

[26:05] looking at the Jewish experience.

[26:07] So many immigrants

[26:08] who came to the United States,

[26:09] last names changed

[26:10] to Ellis Island,

[26:11] not always by the people

[26:12] working at Ellis Island,

[26:13] but by the immigrants

[26:14] themselves in order to

[26:15] have names that the people

[26:17] at Ellis Island

[26:17] would understand.

[26:18] So, you know,

[26:19] I guess what I'm saying is,

[26:20] guys, subtext.

[26:22] Oh, wow, yeah.

[26:23] Well, Lily sits in a room.

[26:24] Give me a movie,

[26:25] give me a movie,

[26:26] I'll tell you the subtext

[26:27] and how it talks about

[26:27] the Jewish experience in America.

Dan McCoy

[26:29] I don't know,

[26:30] I'm looking at gremlins

[26:30] across the room,

[26:31] so.

Elliott Kalan

[26:32] That's racist,

[26:33] that you would even bring that up

[26:34] as a possibility.

[26:35] Okay,

Dan McCoy

[26:35] I just literally,

[26:36] what's in front of me,

Elliott Kalan

[26:37] Just give me another one then,

[26:38] give me another one,

[26:38] give me another one.

[26:38] Gremlins 2.

[26:40] Damn it,

[26:40] that's all we can think about.

[26:41] No, even worse,

[26:43] even worse,

[26:43] that's about control of the media,

[26:45] even worse.

[26:46] All right, Dan,

[26:46] give me another one.

[26:47] I'm just looking at things

[26:48] in my room.

[26:49] Again,

[26:50] incredibly racist.

[26:51] What about munchies?

[26:52] I don't understand.

[26:53] Munchies,

[26:53] that's a great one.

[26:54] Thank you, Stuart.

[26:54] Anyway,

[26:55] again,

[26:56] outsiders,

[26:57] misunderstood,

[26:58] all that kind of stuff.

[26:59] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[26:59] Like this game was rigged.

Elliott Kalan

[27:01] Lily is sitting in a room.

[27:03] Munch,

[27:03] I mean,

[27:04] I know this is munchies too,

[27:05] but if you get enough

[27:06] of my fellow Jewish people together,

[27:07] we will turn into a ball

[27:08] that can roll over somebody

[27:09] and leave just a skeleton behind.

[27:11] Yeah, yeah.

[27:12] That's the way I want to die.

[27:13] Critters 2.

[27:14] Yeah, it's Critters 2.

[27:14] Critters 2 of all.

[27:16] Yeah.

S4

[27:17] Do you mean that is also Critters?

[27:19] Or do you mean it is

[27:20] Critters 2,

[27:21] the new batch?

[27:21] Literally,

Elliott Kalan

[27:21] it's both,

[27:22] it's Critters 2,

[27:23] number 2,

[27:24] the movie,

[27:24] but also,

[27:25] it is also Critters 2.

[27:25] It is Critters 2-2.

S4

[27:27] Yeah.

[27:27] That's the ballet.

[27:28] It's Critters 2-2-7

[27:30] where Jack A. Harry

[27:31] lives in a brownstone

[27:32] with a bunch of critters,

[27:34] with a bunch of krites.

Elliott Kalan

[27:35] Thank you.

Dan McCoy

[27:36] Critters 2-2

[27:37] meets the hooded fang.

Elliott Kalan

[27:39] Anyway,

[27:40] well,

[27:40] Critters 2-2

[27:41] was Joseph Heller's

[27:42] groundbreaking novel

[27:43] about military bureaucracy

[27:45] and how,

[27:46] and remember the character

[27:47] of Critter,

[27:47] Critter,

[27:48] Critter,

[27:48] who was given the rank

[27:49] of Critter

[27:50] because his name

[27:50] was Critter,

[27:51] Critter,

[27:51] Critter.

[27:51] Guys,

[27:52] I'm trying to tell you

Dan McCoy

[27:52] about the monsters.

Elliott Kalan

[27:54] Oh, sorry,

[27:55] sorry.

[27:55] Bring us back

[27:56] to Munster Town.

Dan McCoy

[27:56] We got a lot of plot

[27:57] to tell you.

[27:57] Yeah,

[27:58] there is.

S4

[27:58] Lily is in it.

[27:59] I love that I watched

[28:01] the movie twice

[28:02] and now I get it recounted.

[28:05] I'm experiencing the monsters

[28:06] the third time.

Dan McCoy

[28:09] Lily's lonely.

[28:10] She's sitting in her room

[28:11] combing her hair,

[28:12] thinking about how much

[28:14] she wants love.

[28:15] Will it come to her?

[28:16] Well,

[28:17] meanwhile,

[28:18] the grave robbers,

[28:19] the scientists

[28:20] have put together

[28:22] the creature.

[28:23] They're ready

[28:23] to bring Herman

[28:25] to life

[28:26] and the assistant

[28:29] is like,

[28:30] when he's asked

[28:31] what we should call him,

[28:32] he's like,

[28:33] oh,

[28:33] I know a guy

[28:34] who's named Herman

[28:35] who was a great guy.

[28:36] We should name him Herman

[28:36] and then for the last name

[28:38] because he's eating a sandwich

[28:39] he says Munster.

[28:40] Done.

[28:41] Got it.

[28:42] Uh-huh.

Stuart Wellington

[28:43] Which was funny

[28:44] because make fun

[28:45] of this joke

[28:46] all you want.

[28:47] Dan basically

[28:48] made the same joke

[28:49] in our group chat

[28:50] about how we should

[28:52] do the Munsters.

Dan McCoy

[28:53] I didn't put it in a movie.

[28:53] I didn't think

[28:54] people should.

Elliott Kalan

[28:56] Well,

[28:56] you put it in a group chat

[28:57] which is like

[28:57] the movies of the future.

Dan McCoy

[28:58] Exactly.

[28:59] I mean,

[28:59] our group chat,

[29:00] I am spending

[29:02] part of the time

[29:03] deliberately

[29:03] trying to irritate you.

[29:06] And succeeding.

Stuart Wellington

[29:07] And succeeding.

[29:08] You're a master at it.

S4

[29:08] Yeah.

[29:09] Well,

[29:10] we don't know

[29:10] the artist's intent

[29:11] in Rob Zombie.

[29:13] I think he could be

[29:13] creating jokes

[29:15] along the Dan McCoy

[29:17] method of trying

[29:18] to irritate

[29:18] and provoke

[29:19] the audience.

[29:19] Like an Andy Kaufman

[29:20] kind of.

[29:21] Yeah,

[29:22] yeah,

[29:22] exactly.

[29:22] I love it.

Dan McCoy

[29:24] Well,

[29:24] they zap Herman

[29:26] with electricity

[29:27] for a very long time.

[29:29] It takes a while.

Elliott Kalan

[29:31] I mean,

[29:32] they are bringing

[29:32] someone back

[29:33] from the dead.

[29:33] It's not easy.

[29:34] But for a movie,

Dan McCoy

[29:35] I don't need

[29:36] a bunch of cuts

[29:36] of electricity going.

Elliott Kalan

[29:38] You're saying

[29:38] you should have

[29:39] had a clock wipe

[29:40] and it should have

[29:40] said three hours later

[29:42] and they would have said

[29:42] and just one more jolt

[29:43] and there.

[29:44] I mean,

Elliott Kalan

[29:44] they would use

Stuart Wellington

[29:45] a clock wipe

[29:45] in this movie.

[29:46] Yeah,

[29:46] that's true.

[29:47] He's not moving

Dan McCoy

[29:50] but his heart

[29:52] is making a clanking noise

[29:53] which I thought

[29:54] was a weird choice

[29:54] because they're like,

[29:55] oh,

[29:55] it didn't work.

[29:56] I'm like,

[29:56] well,

[29:57] but there is a heartbeat

[29:58] so why even

[30:00] do that anyway?

[30:02] But he finally wakes up.

[30:03] There's pink lightning

[30:04] cartoon lightning bolts

[30:06] in the back.

[30:07] There's a lot

[30:07] of these transitions

[30:09] like Stuart said.

[30:10] There's hearts

[30:10] behind Lily

[30:12] and Herman

[30:13] when they see each other.

[30:14] Stuff like that.

[30:15] I like those a lot.

[30:16] Those are nice.

[30:17] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[30:18] They're really calling attention

[30:19] to the artifice

[30:20] of the film.

[30:21] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[30:21] Back at Grandpa's

[30:23] watching Good Morning Transylvania

[30:25] with Ezra Mosier.

[30:30] We should point out

[30:32] that the broadcasters

[30:33] we see on TV

S4

[30:34] are played

[30:34] by the principal cast.

[30:35] Yes.

[30:36] that Sherry Moon Zombie

[30:38] is the newscaster

[30:39] who first reports

[30:41] on the death

[30:41] of the genius

[30:42] and then also

[30:43] Daniel Roebuck

[30:45] who plays Grandpa

[30:46] is doing

[30:47] his second

[30:49] of three roles

[30:50] in the film

[30:50] as the host

[30:51] of Good Morning Transylvania.

Dan McCoy

[30:52] And Daniel Roebuck

[30:53] has like 250

[30:55] credits on IMDb

[30:57] but I

[30:58] mostly remember him

[30:59] for playing

[30:59] Jay Leno

[31:00] in The Late Shift,

[31:02] the made-for-TV

[31:04] film about

[31:05] Leno and Letterman's

[31:07] He's great in that.

[31:08] Yeah.

[31:09] Anyway,

[31:09] so Dr. Henry Wolfgang

[31:12] which is the name

[31:13] of the scientist

[31:14] I've missed it up

[31:16] until this point

[31:16] but now I have it

[31:17] in my notes.

Stuart Wellington

[31:18] Okay,

[31:19] so Alex just

[31:20] cut that clip

[31:20] and put that

[31:21] like insert that

[31:22] every time Dan's

[31:23] in the science.

Dan McCoy

[31:24] It's less,

[31:24] I'm less claiming

[31:26] that's a fault of mine

[31:27] and more that this is

[31:28] I think the first time

[31:29] the movie makes a point

[31:30] of identifying him

[31:31] in a

[31:31] I'm not so sure

Elliott Kalan

[31:32] about that

[31:33] but it's possible.

[31:35] There's only one way

[31:36] to find out.

[31:36] Kevin,

[31:37] we're going to need you

[31:37] to watch this movie

[31:38] for a third time.

S4

[31:40] Guys,

[31:40] look,

[31:41] I swear,

[31:41] it's the last time.

[31:42] Anything else

[31:42] you need me to look up,

[31:43] you tell me now.

[31:44] I'm not going to watch

[31:45] you this time.

[31:46] No,

Elliott Kalan

[31:46] I think that's it.

[31:46] I think that's it

[31:47] three hours later.

[31:48] There's a thing

[31:49] that we need you

[31:49] to look up.

Dan McCoy

[31:51] Well,

[31:51] he's on

[31:52] Good Morning Transylvania

[31:53] I guess to promote

[31:54] his Frankenstein's monster.

[31:57] Just to promote

Elliott Kalan

[31:58] being a genius.

[31:58] It's not a product.

[32:00] And we all miss

[32:01] those days

[32:02] when someone would

[32:02] go on The Tonight Show

[32:03] just to talk to Johnny

[32:04] just about something

[32:05] fun they were doing.

[32:06] They didn't have to be

[32:06] promoting a movie

[32:07] or something.

Stuart Wellington

[32:08] Yeah,

[32:08] like they were just

[32:09] trying to bring

[32:10] an animal on stage.

[32:11] Yeah,

[32:11] yeah.

[32:11] Like a live animal

[32:12] that is terrified

[32:14] of being on stage

[32:15] under the lights

[32:15] but they bring him

[32:16] out anyway

[32:16] and wrap him

[32:17] around Johnny.

[32:19] Cool.

Dan McCoy

[32:21] Lily sees Herman

[32:22] on TV

[32:23] and it's love

[32:23] at first sight

[32:24] and I thought

[32:25] there was a pretty

[32:25] funny bit

[32:26] where they have

[32:27] Herman sit down

[32:28] to the piano

[32:29] because he expects

[32:30] that he can play

[32:30] the piano

[32:30] and Herman just

[32:31] smashes it.

[32:32] I laughed at that.

Elliott Kalan

[32:32] Yeah,

[32:33] that was good.

[32:33] That was a good joke.

[32:34] That was great.

[32:35] And after the show

[32:36] the scientists

[32:37] They really paid off

[32:38] the entire scene

[32:39] with a fancy zombie

[32:40] earlier in the movie

[32:41] with that joke.

Dan McCoy

[32:42] It's worth it.

[32:43] The scientist is

[32:44] disappointed obviously

[32:45] about what happened

[32:46] because

[32:48] you know

[32:49] this zombie

[32:49] I forgot

[32:50] Herman also tells

[32:51] a bunch of

[32:51] corny jokes

[32:52] because he was

[32:52] a stand up.

[32:53] Horse belt jokes

[32:54] yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[32:55] I should mention

[32:55] this is one of those

[32:56] times when

[32:57] this should be a movie

[32:57] you can watch with kids.

[32:59] I don't know

[32:59] Kevin maybe you

[33:00] watched it with your kids.

[33:01] They refused.

[33:02] I invited them

[33:03] and they're like

[33:03] no thanks.

[33:05] But when the scientist

[33:06] comes out

[33:07] to brag about his monster

[33:08] they have to bleep

[33:09] his swearing

[33:10] but you still know

[33:11] what he's saying

[33:11] and he's like

[33:12] talking about

[33:12] how they can kiss his ass

[33:13] and they can eat shit

[33:14] and it was like

[33:14] this seems like

Dan McCoy

[33:15] a weird moment

[33:16] for this monsters movie.

Elliott Kalan

[33:18] It seems like

[33:19] the tone is off.

[33:22] It's not like

[33:23] a bunch of minions

Stuart Wellington

[33:24] come out

[33:24] and bear their ass

[33:25] and shit all over people

[33:27] and pull out their fucking dicks

[33:28] and squirt cum

[33:29] all over everything.

[33:30] Usually in the minions movies

[33:31] they don't pull out their dicks

[33:33] and squirt cum

[33:34] It's just like piles

[33:34] of fucking minion jizz

[33:37] I'm not sure if it's pee or not.

Dan McCoy

[33:38] I could find you

[33:39] some clips of minions

[33:39] doing that

[33:40] if I looked around.

[33:41] Not in the official.

[33:42] I don't think that's canon.

[33:43] That's unauthorized.

Stuart Wellington

[33:45] Yeah.

[33:45] Dan belongs to a number

[33:46] of right wing Facebook groups

[33:48] that have repurposed them

[33:50] for memes.

Elliott Kalan

[33:52] I like the idea

[33:52] Dan is also swimming

[33:54] in the kind of

[33:55] Tumblr meme verse

[33:57] where everything he looks at

[33:58] is like Dr. Phil

[33:59] as an Eminem

[34:00] getting married to Shrek

[34:01] and a minion

[34:01] jizzing on stuff.

[34:03] At this point

[34:04] he thinks of that

[34:06] as mainstream culture.

[34:07] So seeing the monsters

[34:07] he's like

[34:08] what is this thing?

[34:09] This is weird.

[34:11] Where's Pregnasonic?

[34:12] This isn't complex enough.

S4

[34:14] Kevin,

[34:14] what were you going to say?

[34:16] Oh, I don't know.

[34:18] I was going to say something

[34:18] about after minion stuff

[34:21] you won't eat a banana

[34:22] after seeing some of those.

[34:25] No, just that

[34:25] it's a little out of character

[34:27] for Elliot pointed out

[34:29] that the Doctor

[34:29] is one of those

[34:30] well, somewhat effeminate

[34:32] Vincent Price

[34:33] evil villain professors

[34:35] who then

[34:36] during his broadcasting moment

[34:39] is using coarse vulgar language

[34:41] seemed a little bit

[34:43] out of character

[34:43] for a character

[34:44] we barely know.

Elliott Kalan

[34:45] Yes, they've established

[34:46] very little about him

[34:47] but what they have established

[34:48] clashes with this.

Stuart Wellington

[34:50] Well, maybe the whole thing

[34:52] is he's all about

[34:52] public perception

[34:53] and maybe the whole

[34:54] like a feat

[34:55] like evil scientist thing

[34:58] is all an act

[34:59] like that

[34:59] he's actually not the high

[35:01] like the cultured

[35:02] man of science

[35:03] that he wants people

[35:04] to think he is

[35:04] he's actually like

[35:05] a piece of gutter-borne trash

[35:07] you know?

Elliott Kalan

[35:08] much like how a lot of

[35:10] Hollywood's first generation

[35:11] had to

[35:12] you know

[35:13] had to come from

[35:14] came from very humble backgrounds

[35:15] very incredibly working class

[35:17] or poverty stricken stock

[35:18] and had to remake themselves

[35:19] as kind of moguls

[35:21] of this new dream factory

[35:22] you're right

[35:22] once again Stuart

[35:23] you put your finger on

[35:25] how the Munsters

[35:26] courtesy of Rob Zombie

[35:27] is such an exploration

[35:28] of the way that

[35:29] the way that Jewish Americans

[35:30] have had to navigate

[35:31] the cross currents

[35:33] of American history and culture

[35:34] so yeah

[35:35] I have to give it

[35:36] I guess

[35:36] two dreidels up

[35:38] I guess that's my

[35:38] I guess that's my rating

[35:40] for the movie

S4

[35:40] and I feel like Stuart

[35:41] you might know

[35:42] what is Rob Zombie's

[35:43] actual last name?

[35:45] although I appreciate

[35:47] that you think

Stuart Wellington

[35:47] I'm a cool dude

[35:49] who knows a lot

[35:49] about Rob Zombie

[35:50] who is?

[35:51] I'm looking it up right now

[35:52] his name is

[35:53] a filmmaker

Elliott Kalan

[35:53] I'm not mad at right now

[35:54] his name is

[35:56] Robert Cummings

[35:58] so

Stuart Wellington

[35:58] it all goes back

[36:00] to minion jizz

[36:01] okay

Dan McCoy

[36:01] oh I don't like that at all

[36:04] returning to the Munsters

[36:05] I don't know whether

[36:06] there's a time jump here

[36:08] or what

[36:09] because it seems

[36:10] all of a sudden

[36:10] that Herman

[36:11] has become a rock star

[36:13] like an established star

[36:15] because Lily goes down

[36:17] out on the town

[36:18] to Zombiagogo

Elliott Kalan

[36:20] where Herman

[36:21] it's a pretty small club

[36:23] I don't know if he's that

[36:24] if he's as huge a star

[36:24] as he thinks

[36:25] it's like you know

Dan McCoy

[36:26] there's no indication

[36:27] of any time having lapsed

[36:29] and now he's

[36:30] headlining this club

[36:31] but he's playing

Stuart Wellington

[36:33] yeah it all goes back

[36:34] to like

[36:34] like

[36:35] like learning

[36:36] the space

[36:37] between the panels

[36:38] you know

[36:38] like how much time

[36:39] passes between that stuff

[36:40] like Scott McCloud

[36:41] would really be able

[36:42] to explain this time jump

[36:43] yeah Dan

[36:43] sounds like someone's

[36:44] got to go back

[36:44] to his understanding

[36:45] comments

Dan McCoy

[36:45] I think that

[36:47] the filmmaker

[36:47] Rob Zombie

[36:48] has not really

[36:49] made it clear

[36:50] that there's a time

[36:51] it's a poor

[36:52] it's a poor craftsman

Elliott Kalan

[36:53] who blames his tools

[36:54] Dan

[36:54] he's the craftsman

[36:56] I'm the viewer

S4

[36:56] I think

Elliott Kalan

[36:58] this is not his podcast

S4

[37:00] the

[37:01] you know

[37:02] those transitional

[37:03] wipes

[37:03] could be signifying

[37:05] the passage of time

[37:07] or it could just be

[37:08] ooh look

[37:09] it's an axe

[37:09] ooh look

[37:10] it's a bat

[37:11] to get you

[37:11] from one scene

[37:12] to the next

Stuart Wellington

[37:12] it's kind of like

[37:13] how on that show

[37:14] Bad Sisters

[37:15] they use a different

[37:16] transition

[37:16] to represent

[37:17] when they shift

[37:18] before JP dies

[37:19] or after JP dies

[37:20] but that's a very

[37:21] clear transition

Dan McCoy

[37:22] unlike these

Elliott Kalan

[37:23] so this is more

[37:25] like the scene

[37:26] transitions on

[37:26] Home Improvement

[37:27] when they got

[37:27] increasingly Baroque

[37:28] and Strange

[37:29] and they'd have

[37:30] animated elements

[37:31] in them

[37:31] where you were like

[37:32] is that part of

[37:33] is that something

[37:33] that just happened

[37:34] or like

[37:35] is there really

[37:35] a snake on the set

[37:36] or is that just

[37:37] an animated transition

[37:38] oh okay

[37:38] it's just an animated

[37:39] transition

[37:39] is Tim Taylor

[37:40] the one

S4

[37:41] is Tim Taylor

[37:41] the one going

[37:42] oh

[37:42] in real time

[37:44] or is that

[37:45] an accompaniment

[37:46] of the

[37:47] videographic

Elliott Kalan

[37:48] or do they have

[37:49] a caveman

[37:49] off camera

[37:50] just doing that

[37:51] into a microphone

[37:51] but Dan you're right

[37:53] it's disorienting

[37:54] it's a disorienting

[37:55] movie

[37:55] and the movie

[37:56] kind of

[37:56] since there's

[37:57] no real plot

[37:57] it kind of

[37:58] picks up things

[37:59] and puts them

[37:59] down again

[38:00] and it's shot

Stuart Wellington

[38:00] at off kilter angles

[38:02] so it leaves you

[38:02] feeling almost

[38:03] like you're

[38:04] awash in a sea

[38:05] of strangeness

[38:07] regardless of

S4

[38:08] the passage of time

[38:09] this is my favorite

[38:10] sequence in the movie

[38:11] when it's Herman Munster

[38:12] and the punk rods

[38:14] doing comedy music

[38:15] performance

[38:16] to a very small

[38:17] audience

[38:18] but we know

[38:18] they have pressed

[38:19] a vinyl

[38:20] and we are

[38:21] under the impression

[38:22] that this has

[38:23] reached some

[38:24] kind of an audience

[38:25] to the point

[38:26] that Lily

[38:26] shows up

[38:27] as a potential

[38:28] groupie

[38:29] for Herman Munster

[38:30] and you know

Elliott Kalan

[38:31] it's a small audience

[38:32] but you know

[38:32] every one of those

[38:33] monsters went out

[38:34] and started

[38:34] a novelty group

[38:35] yeah

[38:35] I've been trying

[38:37] to get to

Dan McCoy

[38:37] for quite some time

[38:39] a small

[38:40] a small detail

[38:41] that delighted me

[38:42] which is when

[38:43] Lily

[38:43] enters zombie

[38:44] go go go

[38:45] the bouncer

[38:46] is an old

[38:47] clunky

[38:47] 50s style

[38:48] robot

[38:48] who pulls

[38:50] back

[38:50] who later

Stuart Wellington

[38:51] goes on

[38:51] to officiate

S4

[38:52] their wedding

[38:52] I wanted to ask

[38:54] if we're supposed

[38:54] to believe

[38:55] that is the same

[38:56] clunky

[38:56] 1950s robot

[38:57] it's certainly

[38:58] the same costume

[38:59] yeah

Dan McCoy

[39:00] it's definitely

[39:00] oh yeah

[39:01] yeah I mean

[39:02] maybe they're

[39:03] a mass produced

[39:03] robot

[39:04] so it could be

[39:04] different robots

[39:05] but it's the same

[39:06] design

[39:06] very possible

[39:07] also downtown

[39:08] Transylvania

[39:09] has a lot of

[39:10] neon signs

[39:10] and Audrey

[39:11] pointed out

[39:12] that this would

[39:12] be in a normal

[39:14] type of this movie

[39:15] like a good

[39:15] opportunity for

[39:16] like puns

[39:17] or jokes

[39:17] on the signs

[39:18] but they just

[39:18] say like

[39:18] massage parlor

[39:20] or whatever

[39:20] they don't

[39:21] do anything

[39:22] with it

[39:22] yeah

[39:23] but anyway

[39:24] yeah

Stuart Wellington

[39:25] that's what

[39:26] this movie

[39:26] needs more

[39:27] of

[39:27] is puns

Dan McCoy

[39:28] Zoya

[39:29] owns this club

[39:31] for some reason

[39:32] we didn't

[39:32] not really important

[39:34] it's just a way

[39:34] to have her

[39:35] also in the scene

[39:36] and plot more

[39:38] with Lester

[39:38] the wolfman

[39:39] who tells him

[39:40] he has two weeks

[39:41] to get the castle

[39:42] backstage

[39:44] Herman

[39:45] and

[39:46] I'm just gonna

[39:47] call him Hurley

[39:47] from Lost

[39:49] are in shiny

[39:51] like rock star

[39:52] clothes

[39:53] which is part

[39:54] of why

[39:54] I was like

[39:54] okay I guess

[39:55] this is later

[39:55] because they've

[39:56] already hit the

[39:57] point in success

[39:58] where they're

[39:59] they're really

[40:00] peacocking

[40:00] they've gotten

[40:01] their shiny

[40:02] clothes license

[40:02] although

Stuart Wellington

[40:02] one of the

[40:03] things I

[40:04] kind of like

[40:04] about this

[40:05] is it

[40:05] does feel

[40:06] like a

[40:06] commitment

[40:07] to the

[40:07] bit

[40:07] that an

[40:08] old sitcom

[40:09] might make

[40:10] where

[40:11] they're like

[40:11] we're gonna

[40:12] be rock stars

[40:13] next scene

[40:14] already have

[40:14] all their

[40:15] rock star

[40:15] clothes

[40:15] yeah

Dan McCoy

[40:16] and

[40:17] Hurley's

[40:19] already like

[40:19] pushing

[40:20] Herman's

[40:20] career

[40:21] and

Elliott Kalan

[40:21] yes

[40:22] for all

[40:22] I know

[40:23] and again

[40:23] we established

[40:24] earlier in the podcast

[40:25] that we don't

[40:26] remember any

[40:26] storylines

[40:27] from the Munsters

[40:27] show

[40:27] this could

[40:28] very well

[40:28] be playing

[40:29] off of an

[40:29] episode of

[40:30] the Munsters

[40:30] where he

[40:30] becomes a

[40:31] rock star

[40:31] the show

[40:32] came out

[40:32] in the early

[40:33] 60s

[40:34] the costume

S4

[40:34] is absolutely

[40:35] from Munster

[40:37] go home

[40:37] where he

[40:38] races

[40:38] race car

[40:40] and wears

[40:40] some of that

[40:41] get up

[40:41] with the

[40:41] goggles

[40:42] on top

[40:42] of the

[40:43] leather

[40:43] jacket

[40:44] and to

[40:45] research for

[40:45] the show

[40:46] I watched

[40:46] two episodes

[40:46] of the Munsters

[40:47] last night

[40:47] and I was like

[40:48] if I'm gonna

[40:48] watch it

[40:49] I'm finally

[40:49] gonna watch

[40:50] the episode

[40:50] with the

[40:50] Standells

[40:51] 60s

[40:52] garage band

[40:54] who rather

[40:55] than stay

[40:55] at a hotel

[40:56] the Standells

[40:56] decide

[40:57] we need to

[40:58] stay at a

[40:58] mansion

[40:58] like that

[40:59] spooky mansion

[41:00] in town

[41:00] but there

[41:02] is a

[41:02] rock and roll

[41:03] band episode

[41:05] that does not

[41:06] involve Herman

[41:06] being in the band

[41:07] but after the band

[41:08] performs

[41:08] they invite Herman

[41:09] up to recite

[41:11] some beat poetry

[41:12] which is the

[41:14] closest we get

[41:15] I think in the

[41:15] original series

[41:16] or at least

[41:17] in the first season

[41:17] of Herman

[41:18] becoming a

[41:19] front man

[41:20] for a rock

[41:21] group

Elliott Kalan

[41:21] I love that

[41:22] the show exists

[41:23] during that time

[41:24] period when

[41:24] there was not

[41:25] really much

[41:25] of an

[41:26] understanding

[41:26] of beatniks

[41:27] and rockers

[41:28] being different

[41:28] and it was just

[41:29] like

Stuart Wellington

[41:30] it was all

[41:30] under one

[41:30] umbrella

Elliott Kalan

[41:31] weird youth

[41:32] culture

[41:32] I guess

[41:32] they do

[41:33] spoken word

[41:34] poetry

[41:34] and also

[41:35] they play

[41:35] those electric

[41:35] guitars

[41:36] Peter Bagg

Stuart Wellington

[41:37] is going to

[41:37] be able to

[41:37] draw both

[41:38] of them

[41:38] as caricatures

Elliott Kalan

[41:39] there's something

[41:41] very Bob Hope

[41:42] pretending to be

[41:42] a Beatle

[41:43] about that

S4

[41:43] well curiously

[41:46] the Standells

[41:46] play a cover

[41:47] of I Want to

[41:47] Hold Your Hand

[41:48] so it even

[41:50] extends even

[41:51] further

[41:51] but Dan

[41:52] would you please

[41:53] get us back

[41:54] to the story

[41:55] recap

Dan McCoy

[41:55] well what happens

[41:57] now is that

[41:58] Lester points

[42:00] Lily back

[42:01] to Herman

[42:01] and he

[42:03] also

[42:04] reacts to her

[42:05] with a bunch

[42:05] of cartoon

[42:06] hearts

[42:06] love at first

[42:07] sight

Stuart Wellington

[42:07] she invites

[42:09] it's a very

[42:10] cute scene

[42:10] of them

[42:11] each trying

[42:12] to

[42:12] flirting with

[42:13] each other

[42:13] and he's

[42:14] trying to

[42:14] play it cool

[42:15] and he'll

[42:15] close the

[42:16] door

[42:16] and then

[42:17] you'll hear

[42:17] him off

[42:18] behind the

[42:18] door

[42:19] like saying

[42:19] oh goody

[42:20] oh geez

[42:20] oh gosh

[42:21] and I gotta

[42:22] say we

[42:22] haven't

[42:23] mentioned

[42:23] this

[42:23] so the

[42:23] actor who

[42:24] plays

[42:25] Herman

[42:25] Munster

[42:25] is

[42:26] it's

[42:26] like

[42:27] Jeff

[42:28] Daniel

[42:28] Phillips

[42:29] or something

[42:29] I don't

[42:30] have it in

[42:31] front of me

[42:31] but like

[42:32] again

[42:32] Jeff

[42:33] Daniel

[42:33] Phillips

[42:33] you got

[42:33] it right

[42:34] you get

[42:35] 100 casting

[42:35] points for this episode

[42:36] yeah I'm amazing

[42:37] so he

[42:38] not only does he

[42:40] look a lot

[42:41] like Fred

[42:41] Gwynn

[42:42] but

[42:42] his

[42:43] like he pitches

[42:44] his performance

[42:45] at the right

[42:46] level

[42:46] like he does

[42:47] he has a big

[42:48] performance

[42:49] his face is

[42:50] super

[42:50] emotive

[42:52] I think he does

[42:52] a great job

[42:53] I think he

[42:53] captures

[42:54] with his

Dan McCoy

[42:54] giant suit

[42:55] on

[42:55] he captures

[42:56] some of

[42:56] like the

[42:57] Fred Gwynn

[42:57] vibe without

[42:58] doing a

[42:59] direct impression

[42:59] and yeah

[43:01] I think he

[43:02] does a terrific

[43:02] job

[43:03] I think that

[43:04] our three

[43:05] primaries are

[43:06] all very good

[43:07] in the movie

[43:08] yeah

[43:09] but yeah

[43:10] and the little

[43:11] scene where he

[43:12] keeps ducking

[43:13] back out of

[43:13] sight to

[43:14] freak out

[43:15] while the

[43:15] camera stays

[43:16] out with

[43:16] Sherry Moon

[43:17] Zombie who

[43:18] can hear

[43:18] everything

[43:19] is one of

[43:20] the parts

[43:21] where it

[43:22] comes closest

[43:23] to working

[43:23] there's

[43:24] some stuff

[43:25] in here

[43:25] super cute

[43:26] that's sweet

[43:27] and fun

[43:27] but so

[43:29] she invites him

[43:31] over for dinner

[43:32] we get a little

[43:34] bit where they're

[43:34] each worried

[43:35] about like

[43:36] he's worried

[43:36] he has to be

[43:37] like a cool

[43:37] entertainment

[43:38] rock star guy

[43:39] and she's worried

[43:41] that she's not

[43:41] going to be cool

[43:42] enough for him

[43:42] like that's the

[43:43] sort of thing

[43:44] that in another

[43:44] movie would like

[43:45] set up

[43:46] something

[43:46] it doesn't

[43:47] here

[43:48] no

[43:48] it doesn't

[43:49] which I have to admit

[43:50] I'm relieved

[43:51] I hate that

[43:51] kind of thing

[43:52] but

Elliott Kalan

[43:52] well and also

[43:53] Lily's dad

[43:54] clearly doesn't

[43:55] like him

[43:55] and that sets up

[43:56] I think

[43:57] two other scenes

[43:57] and then that's

[43:58] it

[43:58] like at a certain

[43:59] point

[43:59] any sort of

[44:00] rivalry between

[44:01] the two of them

[44:02] is dropped

[44:02] also

S4

[44:02] there's also

[44:03] during

[44:05] when Herman

[44:05] goes over

[44:06] for dinner

[44:06] he's outside

[44:07] after having

[44:08] butted heads

[44:09] with

[44:10] we keep calling

[44:10] him grandpa

[44:11] he's not a

[44:11] grandpa yet

[44:12] he's the count

[44:13] but for simplicity's

[44:14] sake we're going to

[44:14] keep calling him grandpa

[44:15] Herman butts heads

Elliott Kalan

[44:16] he's just a dad

[44:18] thanks for giving us

[44:20] honest

[44:20] you just forestalled

[44:22] us getting a bunch

[44:23] of Pinocchios

[44:24] in the

[44:24] in Washington Post

[44:25] so I really

[44:25] appreciate that

S4

[44:26] but Herman

[44:28] says to her

[44:29] I swear

[44:31] I'm going to

[44:32] devote my life

[44:33] to winning

[44:33] over grandpa

[44:35] and that

[44:36] you know

[44:37] that a lot

[44:38] of attention

[44:38] is given

[44:39] to this moment

[44:39] and it's

[44:40] in the next scene

[44:40] it's completely

[44:41] abandoned

[44:41] we give up

[44:43] on that quest

Elliott Kalan

[44:43] yeah like you say

[44:44] it doesn't

[44:45] there's no payoff

[44:46] to that

[44:46] and also

[44:47] he's not called

[44:48] he shouldn't be called

[44:48] grandpa yet

[44:50] like and

[44:51] they I know

[44:52] and the character

[44:52] he's known as grandpa

[44:53] in the show

[44:54] Al Lewis who played him

[44:55] legally

[44:56] had tried to have

[44:57] his name on the

[44:58] ballot for the

[44:59] mayor of New York

[45:00] as grandpa Al Lewis

[45:01] because that's what

[45:01] he would call himself

[45:02] but you're right

[45:04] it's funny when

[45:04] everyone knows

[45:05] the character's grandpa

[45:06] but he's not that yet

[45:07] I mean I don't

Stuart Wellington

[45:07] I

[45:08] I hate to

[45:10] potentially dogpile

[45:11] on a bad character

[45:13] but there's a chance

[45:14] that his son

[45:14] Lester might have

[45:15] an illegitimate child

[45:16] and that's why

[45:17] they call him grandpa

Elliott Kalan

[45:18] I mean or a legitimate

[45:19] child

[45:19] we don't know

Stuart Wellington

[45:20] anything about Lester

[45:20] I don't think

[45:21] anyone in the movie

[45:22] calls him grandpa

[45:22] I think we've

[45:23] called him grandpa

S4

[45:25] they call him the count

Elliott Kalan

[45:26] oh I thought you said

[45:27] that Herman called him

[45:27] grandpa

S4

[45:28] no I was misspeaking

[45:30] I was paraphrasing

[45:31] you know what guys

[45:32] I think

[45:32] I think I need to

[45:34] watch the movie again

[45:35] okay

Stuart Wellington

[45:35] yeah I think you need

[45:36] to check

[45:36] just fire it up

[45:39] on your phone

[45:40] throw the subtitles

S4

[45:41] on

[45:41] if everyone can pause

[45:42] I will come back

[45:43] in an hour

[45:44] and 49 minutes

[45:45] and we'll drop it

[45:47] and we're back

[45:48] yeah

[45:49] yeah they never

[45:50] call him

[45:50] they never call

[45:51] grandpa

[45:51] then I

Elliott Kalan

[45:52] then I owe an

[45:52] apology to everyone

[45:53] behind the making

[45:55] 2022

[45:55] I was misled

[45:57] I'm sorry

[45:58] and I hope we can

[45:59] put this behind us

[46:00] and we can continue

[46:01] to have our original

[46:01] relationship

[46:02] you as a subject

[46:04] of mockery for me

[46:05] on a podcast

[46:05] after I tolerated

[46:07] watching you

[46:08] when I could have

[46:09] been diving into

[46:10] this trove of

[46:11] Czech films

[46:11] that I just found

[46:12] online that I'm

[46:12] very excited about

[46:13] watching

Stuart Wellington

[46:13] I guess since

[46:14] Elliot's apologizing

[46:15] I should pull up

[46:16] that article about

[46:17] what to do

[46:18] when your podcast

[46:19] co-host gets cancelled

[46:20] of all the things

Elliott Kalan

[46:22] I was going to get

[46:23] cancelled for

[46:23] it wasn't any of the

Stuart Wellington

[46:25] subparagraph D

Elliott Kalan

[46:29] Jewish jokes earlier

[46:29] but it was me

[46:30] getting mad at the

[46:31] monkey about something

[46:31] it hadn't done

Dan McCoy

[46:32] all evidence to the

[46:33] contrary

[46:33] we were only halfway

[46:34] through the Munsters

[46:35] oh god

[46:36] oh wow

[46:36] let's say a little

[46:39] more focus

Elliott Kalan

[46:39] but here's where

[46:40] the plot really

[46:41] kicks in

Dan McCoy

[46:42] yeah

[46:42] as mentioned

[46:43] grandpa's

[46:44] unimpressed by

[46:45] Herman

[46:45] there's a lot of

[46:47] cartoon

[46:47] oompa

[46:48] background music

[46:49] underlining

[46:50] everything

[46:50] and

[46:52] there's a romantic

[46:53] stroll between

[46:54] Herman and Lily

[46:55] which leads

[46:56] directly into them

[46:57] singing

[46:57] I got you babe

[46:59] a montage of

[47:00] falling in love

[47:02] with stuff like

Elliott Kalan

[47:03] and then they're

[47:03] dressed as

[47:04] Sonny and Cher

[47:05] eventually

Dan McCoy

[47:05] yeah

[47:05] Lily gets a tattoo

[47:07] of Herman's face

[47:08] they have a

[47:08] drink with two straws

[47:10] rats and bats

[47:11] soda shark

[47:11] and he gets a tattoo

Stuart Wellington

[47:12] and cries

[47:13] which was very funny

[47:14] he got her name

[47:15] tattooed

[47:15] and then she got

[47:16] like a super

[47:17] like hyper realistic

[47:18] portrait of him

[47:19] and she's fine

Elliott Kalan

[47:20] were you guys

[47:22] also like me

[47:23] waiting for the

[47:24] moment when their

[47:25] version of I got you babe

[47:26] would turn into like

[47:26] a monster parody

[47:27] of I got you babe

[47:28] and not just be the song

Stuart Wellington

[47:30] or like a punk rock

[47:31] beatnik

[47:32] yes

Elliott Kalan

[47:32] but it's just the song

[47:34] it's just a

[47:34] straightforward song

[47:35] right there's no

[47:36] I kept waiting for them

[47:36] to be like

[47:37] they say our bats

[47:39] can't pay the rent

[47:40] before you know it

[47:41] the blood has all

[47:42] been sucked

[47:43] but they don't do that

[47:43] at that point

Dan McCoy

[47:44] I had given up

[47:45] on the monsters

[47:47] jokes

[47:47] trying to be funny

[47:48] like fulfilling

[47:50] their premise

[47:51] of doing monster

[47:51] versions of things

[47:52] yeah

[47:52] but speaking of

[47:54] how grandpa's

[47:56] dislike of Herman

[47:56] goes nowhere

[47:57] he's like

[47:58] the future grandpa

[47:59] yeah

[48:00] again we're just

[48:01] gonna call him

[48:02] grandpa

[48:02] we don't need to

[48:04] why this became

[48:05] an issue

[48:05] everyone knows

Elliott Kalan

[48:06] as Kevin McClary

[48:08] he should be called

[48:09] the count

[48:09] last name unknown

[48:10] because we don't

[48:11] know what he's

[48:12] the count is

Elliott Kalan

[48:12] we do know

[48:12] his last name

S4

[48:13] because they say

[48:13] his last name

[48:14] at the wedding ceremony

[48:15] oh they do

[48:16] that's right

[48:16] what was it

[48:17] can you watch

[48:17] the movie again

[48:18] if everybody

[48:19] could just pause

[48:20] for an hour

[48:24] I will be back

[48:25] with this information

[48:28] so

[48:30] guys I'm back

[48:33] why I didn't

[48:34] skip ahead

[48:35] through Netflix

[48:36] Netflix

[48:37] and just go

[48:37] right ahead

[48:38] I watched

[48:38] the entire

[48:39] movie again

[48:39] and unfortunately

[48:40] I went to the

[48:41] bathroom during

[48:42] the wedding scene

[48:43] so I don't

[48:43] I didn't find out

[48:44] but I'm pretty sure

[48:46] I'm pretty sure

[48:46] they do say

[48:47] her maiden name

Elliott Kalan

[48:48] okay

[48:50] so

[48:50] because on Wikipedia

[48:51] the original character

[48:52] is just called

[48:52] Count Sam Dracula

[48:54] which I think

[48:54] is funny

[48:55] that his first name

[48:55] Sam

Dan McCoy

[48:55] there's a lot

[48:56] of back and forth

[48:57] I'm not gonna do it

[48:58] in direct actual

[48:59] movie order

[49:00] because it's

[49:01] easier to just

[49:02] thematically lump

[49:03] some things

[49:04] because as we

[49:05] pointed out

[49:05] grandpa's

[49:06] dislike of

[49:08] Herman doesn't

[49:08] really go much

[49:09] of anywhere

[49:10] because he's

[49:11] like oh we

[49:12] gotta get rid

[49:12] of him

[49:13] I'm gonna

[49:13] come up with

[49:14] this husband

[49:15] spell

[49:15] I'm gonna

[49:15] conjure a

[49:17] perfect husband

[49:17] for Lily

[49:18] instead

[49:18] and he does

[49:19] the spell

[49:20] wrong

[49:20] and he gets

[49:21] this dancing

[49:22] cowboy

[49:22] chimp man

[49:23] and then that's

[49:24] just dropped

[49:25] like that

[49:26] it's really

[49:27] one scene

[49:29] of that

Elliott Kalan

[49:29] it's a throw

[49:31] it's a throwaway

[49:32] scene

[49:32] because the movie

[49:33] is so

[49:34] all over the place

[49:36] you don't know

[49:36] if this

[49:37] is like okay

[49:37] is this a character

[49:38] that's coming back

[49:38] is this setting up

[49:39] something

[49:39] oh no it's not

[49:40] it's just a throwaway

[49:41] joke

S4

[49:41] when I was looking

[49:42] at Monsters episodes

[49:43] last night

[49:44] I didn't end up

[49:45] watching this one

[49:46] but there's an

[49:47] episode where

[49:48] Grandpa

[49:49] in the sitcom

[49:49] his name is Grandpa

[49:50] takes a frog

[49:52] to create

[49:53] a suitor

[49:54] for cousin

[49:56] Marilyn

[49:56] because they feel

[49:58] like she's so

[49:59] she's hideous

[49:59] plain and hideous

[50:00] she's never gonna

[50:01] find a man

[50:02] so they create

[50:02] Grandpa

[50:03] casts a spell

[50:05] to create a suitor

[50:05] for her

[50:06] so I wonder

[50:07] if that is

[50:08] if that sequence

[50:09] that goes nowhere

[50:10] is a little

[50:11] is a little something

[50:12] for the fans

[50:13] a little fan service

[50:14] yeah

[50:15] yeah a little easter egg

Stuart Wellington

[50:16] yeah

[50:16] or they would

[50:17] they would call

[50:17] they called a

[50:19] beast-er egg

[50:23] creepy monsters

[50:23] yeah yeah

Elliott Kalan

[50:24] the

[50:24] and the

[50:25] the misapprehension

[50:27] in that scene

[50:27] the reason he ends up

[50:28] with a monkey man

[50:28] is because he thinks

[50:29] he has Tarzan's hair

[50:30] but he actually

[50:30] has Cheetah's hair

[50:31] Cheetah of course

[50:32] being the chimp

[50:33] from Tarzan

[50:33] and I guarantee you

[50:34] if I'd watch that

[50:34] with my kids

[50:35] they would have

[50:35] no idea

[50:36] what that joke

[50:36] means

[50:37] they wouldn't

[50:37] understand the

[50:38] reference

[50:38] they would think

[50:39] you're talking

[50:39] about a cheetah

[50:39] the animal

Stuart Wellington

[50:40] I'm gonna stop

[50:41] you right there

[50:41] most times

[50:42] when there's jokes

[50:43] and references

[50:43] in a movie

[50:44] kids don't care

[50:45] yeah

[50:45] if it's

[50:46] if the line

[50:47] is delivered

[50:47] like a joke

[50:48] they will think

[50:48] it's funny

[50:49] that's very true

[50:49] they just like

[50:50] the rhythm of it

Dan McCoy

[50:51] I did understand

[50:52] the reference

[50:53] hmm

[50:53] okay

Stuart Wellington

[50:54] yeah

Dan McCoy

[50:56] that was my reaction

[50:57] so

Stuart Wellington

[50:57] you didn't have to

[50:59] go to the emergency room

[51:00] because your sides

[51:01] have split

Dan McCoy

[51:01] they had to put

[51:03] my stuffing back in

[51:04] and sew me up

Elliott Kalan

[51:04] you're not in

[51:05] you're not in

[51:06] behavioral therapy

[51:06] to get yourself

[51:07] from stopping

[51:08] to slapping

[51:08] your knees

[51:09] all the time

[51:09] because the joke

[51:10] is so funny

[51:11] yeah

Dan McCoy

[51:11] so meanwhile

[51:12] the doctor

[51:13] has returned

[51:13] from Leper Island

[51:15] where he was

[51:16] on vacation

[51:16] apparently

[51:18] did I miss

[51:18] the setup

[51:19] for this

[51:20] but he's got

[51:21] leprosy now

[51:22] that doesn't

[51:22] really figure

[51:23] into anything

[51:24] meanwhile

[51:27] Herman and Lily

[51:28] have gotten engaged

[51:29] on a beach

[51:30] which causes

[51:32] grandpa to faint

[51:33] we cut directly

[51:34] to a coffin

[51:35] but of course

[51:36] you know

[51:37] a vampire

[51:37] he didn't die

[51:38] out of

[51:39] out of shock

[51:40] he's just going

[51:41] to the wedding

[51:41] it's a wedding

[51:42] coffin

[51:42] Lester

[51:44] shows up

[51:45] to the wedding

[51:45] introduces himself

[51:46] to Herman

[51:47] makes sense

[51:48] he's the brother

[51:49] of the bride

[51:49] why not invite him

[51:50] he's like

[51:51] hey I pointed

[51:51] Lily your way

[51:53] which is really

[51:54] like he really

[51:54] literally just said

[51:55] oh he's down

[51:57] he's down the hall

[51:57] so he didn't really

[51:58] do much in their

[51:59] love connection

[51:59] but this is enough

[52:00] for Herman

[52:00] to sign

[52:01] a contract

[52:03] that he's given

[52:04] and he uses

Stuart Wellington

[52:05] some other

[52:05] manipulative

Elliott Kalan

[52:06] techniques

[52:07] I mean Herman

[52:08] is also not

[52:08] the brightest

[52:09] bulb

[52:09] well meaning

[52:11] very sweet

[52:12] not the smartest

[52:13] here's

[52:13] I'm not

[52:14] what a fucking

[52:14] body on this guy

[52:16] right

[52:16] oh yeah

[52:17] it's shaped

[52:17] like an exclamation

[52:18] point

[52:18] yeah sure

[52:19] I'm not a

[52:20] I'm not a

[52:20] property rights

[52:21] lawyer

[52:22] but it seems

[52:23] like if

[52:24] an old man

[52:25] for the purposes

[52:26] of ease

[52:26] let's call him

[52:27] grandpa

[52:27] owns a castle

[52:29] and his daughter

[52:30] marries a man

[52:31] and they're not

[52:32] even really married

[52:33] yet because they

[52:33] haven't had the

[52:34] ceremony

[52:34] yet right

[52:35] that if he

[52:36] signs the contract

[52:37] it does not

[52:39] transfer ownership

[52:40] of the castle

[52:41] like that the

[52:41] the castle is not

[52:42] just general family

[52:43] property

[52:44] that any member

[52:45] of the family

[52:45] can sign

Dan McCoy

[52:46] the monsters

[52:46] does not reflect

[52:47] real estate law

[52:50] as it exists

[52:50] in real life

[52:51] certainly

[52:52] American real estate

[52:53] law

Elliott Kalan

[52:55] this is happening

[52:55] in Transylvania

[52:56] between monsters

[52:57] it's possible

[52:57] the laws are different

[52:58] and that you can

[52:59] marry into a family

[53:00] that's giving you

[53:01] I guess

[53:01] equal say

[53:02] over what happens

[53:03] to the property

[53:04] of the parents

[53:05] of that family

[53:06] but

[53:06] yeah I'm just

[53:07] saying the monsters

[53:08] get burnt

Stuart Wellington

[53:09] put it in the goofs

[53:10] it's interesting

[53:11] that Herman's

[53:12] signature

[53:12] holds more weight

[53:14] than Lester

[53:14] who's actually

[53:15] blood relative

[53:16] that's a good point

Elliott Kalan

[53:17] why Lester

[53:18] maybe there's a scene

[53:20] that was cut

[53:20] where the count

[53:21] gives Herman

[53:21] power of attorney

Stuart Wellington

[53:24] yeah

[53:26] just

[53:26] yeah let's

[53:27] okay let's go on

[53:28] I don't want to

[53:29] hold you up

Elliott Kalan

[53:29] yeah sorry Dan

[53:30] I know we're not

[53:30] here to have fun

[53:31] we're here to get

[53:31] through the plot

[53:32] of the monsters

[53:32] as efficiently

[53:33] as possible

[53:33] look I was the one

Stuart Wellington

[53:37] who in the past

Dan McCoy

[53:38] said that people

[53:40] listen for the

[53:41] people listen for the

[53:42] bits but again

[53:44] we're

Elliott Kalan

[53:45] but again there's an

[53:46] unserved audience

[53:48] out there that just

[53:48] wants that has a

[53:49] test on the monsters

[53:50] movie tomorrow

[53:51] and does not have

[53:52] time to watch it

Dan McCoy

[53:52] 50 some minutes

[53:53] into this podcast

[53:54] and we're still

[53:56] got a lot of ways

[53:57] to go that's all

[53:58] we can skip

Stuart Wellington

[54:00] huge chunks

[54:00] and it won't hurt

[54:01] this podcast

[54:02] I bet Dan

Elliott Kalan

[54:03] you could skip

[54:03] their entire

[54:04] honeymoon in Paris

[54:05] and I don't think

[54:06] anyone would be like

[54:06] wait but what

[54:07] happened

[54:07] but that's where

[54:07] they find the

[54:08] monster pet

[54:09] that is where

[54:09] they find spot

[54:10] their pet

S4

[54:10] yeah sure

[54:11] you know

[54:11] we gotta point out

[54:12] the third

[54:13] Daniel Roebuck

[54:14] character

[54:14] I'm just asking

[54:16] for a

[54:16] Frenchman at

[54:17] cafe

Dan McCoy

[54:17] just a little

[54:19] bit of air

[54:19] to get through

[54:20] it I'm not

[54:20] saying don't

[54:21] have fun guys

[54:22] I'm saying

[54:23] let's be

Elliott Kalan

[54:25] judicious with

[54:25] it

[54:27] it's the

[54:27] monsters

[54:28] not the

[54:28] funsters

[54:28] let's take

[54:29] this seriously

[54:29] let's file this

Stuart Wellington

[54:30] podcast under

[54:30] educational

S4

[54:31] all right

[54:33] I just want to

[54:33] place a special

[54:36] request to the

[54:36] editor that when

[54:37] Dan says we

[54:38] need a little

[54:38] bit of air

[54:39] that you play

[54:40] a loud fart

[54:41] sound effect

[54:41] thank you

Dan McCoy

[54:42] yeah yeah

[54:42] perfect

[54:43] I thought you

[54:43] were gonna

[54:44] play a little

Elliott Kalan

[54:46] bit of moon

[54:47] safari

[54:47] sexy boy

[54:50] and then Alex

[54:52] could you look

[54:52] through the

[54:53] entire archives

[54:54] for anytime

[54:55] Dan says

[54:55] ah I needed

[54:56] to do that

[54:57] and put that

[54:58] in after the

[54:59] fart sound effect

[54:59] that'd be great

[55:00] okay

Dan McCoy

[55:01] so anyway

[55:03] the two of them

[55:05] get married

[55:05] with the

[55:06] I have in my

[55:07] notes with the

[55:07] robot question

[55:08] mark bouncer

[55:09] as the

[55:09] officiant

[55:10] the doctor's

[55:12] happy that

[55:13] he's married

[55:14] off his

[55:15] his

[55:15] built son

[55:17] saying he's

[55:17] grandpa's

[55:18] problem now

[55:18] which I don't

[55:19] Herman seems

[55:20] like a sweetheart

[55:21] why everyone's

[55:21] I thought that

Elliott Kalan

[55:21] was kind of

[55:22] funny

[55:23] and the

[55:23] ceremony

[55:24] goes off

[55:24] with the

[55:25] only hitch

[55:25] being that

[55:26] the robot

[55:26] briefly burst

[55:27] into flames

[55:27] right

Dan McCoy

[55:28] and they see

[55:29] Lester while

[55:30] they're driving

[55:30] away and Lily's

[55:31] like I hope you

[55:32] didn't get in a

[55:32] business scheme

[55:33] with him

[55:33] I'd hate to

[55:34] think I'd

[55:34] married a

[55:34] blockhead

[55:35] and Herman's

[55:36] like

[55:36] and so we cut

[55:39] to Zoya and

[55:41] Lester

[55:41] Zoya celebrates

[55:42] her you know

[55:43] grift working

[55:44] out and there's

[55:45] a montage

Stuart Wellington

[55:46] and we find

[55:46] out

[55:46] we find out

Stuart Wellington

[55:46] the reason

[55:48] is because

[55:48] she is

[55:50] grandpa's

[55:51] or the man

[55:52] who will

[55:52] someday be

[55:53] known as

[55:53] grandpa

[55:54] the man

[55:54] who would

[55:54] be grandpa

[55:55] yes

[55:57] that she

[55:58] is his

[55:58] ex-wife

[55:59] and that she

[56:00] is vindictive

[56:02] and this was

[56:03] all a scheme

Dan McCoy

[56:03] to get back

[56:04] also if she's

[56:04] just actually

[56:05] it seems like

[56:05] again she has

[56:07] more of a legal

[56:07] claim to part

[56:08] of the castle

[56:08] than Herman

[56:10] than Herman

Elliott Kalan

[56:10] yeah his

[56:11] daughter's

[56:12] fiance

[56:12] yeah

Dan McCoy

[56:13] anyway

[56:14] they have

[56:15] their honeymoon

[56:17] in Paris

[56:17] there's a

[56:18] montage

[56:18] they walk

[56:19] into a cafe

[56:19] where everyone's

[56:20] terrified of them

[56:21] and when the

[56:21] mime has a

[56:22] heart attack

[56:22] and dies

[56:23] he mimes

[56:24] having his

[56:25] heart pulled

[56:26] out right

[56:26] before he

[56:27] falls dead

[56:28] and I thought

[56:28] that was pretty

[56:29] funny

[56:29] they explore

[56:30] the catacombs

[56:31] where Herman

[56:32] wrestles a rubber

[56:33] sort of gargle

[56:34] dragon

[56:34] and that's

[56:35] their pet

[56:35] now

[56:36] and in the

[56:38] show you

[56:38] would just

[56:38] in the old

[56:39] show you

[56:39] just see his

[56:39] tail

[56:39] yeah

[56:40] I was like

[56:42] still good

[56:43] liked it all

[56:44] yeah I mean

[56:45] having not

[56:46] really watched

[56:46] the show

[56:47] I'm like

[56:47] why is this

[56:48] what is this

[56:49] why is this

[56:49] here

[56:50] yeah

[56:50] but anyway

Elliott Kalan

[56:52] I guess you

[56:53] could say

[56:54] movie doesn't

[56:54] really stand

[56:55] alone on its

[56:56] own as a

[56:57] piece of

[56:57] storytelling

[56:57] you kind of

[56:58] need a little

[56:59] bit of a

[56:59] grounding in the

[57:00] television show

Stuart Wellington

[57:01] and the

[57:01] important thing

[57:02] this Paris

[57:02] scene is it

[57:03] establishes

[57:04] that normal

[57:04] people find

[57:06] hideous

[57:06] possibly terrifying

[57:08] to the point

[57:08] of dying

[57:09] yes

[57:09] and the Munsters

[57:11] find regular

[57:12] non-Transylvanians

[57:14] to be horrifying

[57:16] to look at as

[57:16] well

Elliott Kalan

[57:16] yes

[57:17] apparently they've

[57:18] never

[57:18] this is the first

[57:19] time the movie

[57:19] leaves Transylvania

[57:20] and yeah

[57:21] we learn that

[57:23] it's a real

[57:23] clash of cultures

[57:25] between Munsters

[57:26] and let's just

[57:27] call them

[57:27] nonsters

[57:29] yeah

[57:29] they're not

[57:30] monsters

[57:30] they're nonsters

[57:30] from now on

Stuart Wellington

[57:31] we'll refer to

[57:31] non Munsters

[57:33] as nonsters

[57:34] yeah

Elliott Kalan

[57:35] also in our

[57:36] daily life

Stuart Wellington

[57:37] yes ideally

[57:37] yeah

[57:38] that's the only

[57:38] way it'll

[57:39] stick

[57:39] yeah

Dan McCoy

[57:40] grandpa learns

[57:42] that he's losing

[57:43] the castle

[57:44] he goes to

[57:45] Paris to

[57:45] tell them

[57:47] the news

[57:47] to get mad

[57:48] at Herman

[57:48] they decide to

[57:49] lawyer up

Elliott Kalan

[57:49] their hotel room

[57:50] is huge

[57:51] they've got an

[57:51] amazing hotel room

[57:52] yeah

[57:52] yeah it's great

Dan McCoy

[57:53] uh the lawyer

[57:54] who is in jail

[57:56] in German

[57:57] says that they're

[57:58] screwed

[57:58] meanwhile Herman

[58:00] is watching a TV

[58:02] show

[58:02] uh called

[58:03] Zombo

[58:04] uh-huh

[58:05] and uh

[58:06] it's just like a

[58:08] monster running

[58:08] around

[58:09] it's like

[58:09] Zombo

[58:10] Zombo

[58:11] I'm not really

[58:11] sure what the

[58:11] show is

[58:12] but

[58:12] he's like

[58:13] watching Adult

[58:14] Swim

Elliott Kalan

[58:14] at first

[58:16] I assumed

[58:17] it was kind

[58:17] of like a

[58:17] Zachary

[58:18] kind of like

[58:19] Goularty

[58:19] type takeoff

[58:20] but then I'm

[58:20] not sure

[58:21] because he's

[58:21] not

[58:21] I'm pretty

S4

[58:22] sure that's

[58:23] something

[58:23] it's a nod

[58:24] to a

[58:24] single episode

[58:26] of the original

[58:27] series

[58:27] probably

Elliott Kalan

[58:28] it's so funny

[58:29] I love that

S4

[58:30] even that stuff

[58:31] diehard monster

[58:32] fans are like

[58:33] what the hell

[58:33] is up with that

[58:34] like that was

Elliott Kalan

[58:35] for you

[58:36] that was for you

[58:38] monsters fans

[58:39] my god

[58:40] I was in one

[58:41] episode

[58:42] get out of the

[58:42] house every now

[58:43] and then

[58:43] it just shows

[58:44] how important

[58:45] frame of reference

[58:46] is and like

[58:46] I should own

[58:47] up to

[58:47] it's like

[58:48] if this was

[58:49] a Simpsons

[58:49] movie

[58:50] or a news

[58:51] radio movie

[58:51] and they

[58:52] did a

[58:52] joke about

[58:54] one single

[58:54] episode

[58:55] I'd be like

[58:55] ha ha

[58:56] that's brilliant

[58:57] I remember it

[58:58] it's just that

[58:59] the monsters

[58:59] did not penetrate

[59:00] in my consciousness

[59:01] the same way

[59:02] so Rob Zombie

Stuart Wellington

[59:03] do what you're gonna do

[59:03] when my wife

[59:04] is watching

[59:04] the gilded age

[59:05] with me

[59:05] and they make

[59:06] a reference

[59:06] to up and

[59:07] coming

[59:07] architect

[59:08] Stanford White

[59:09] and she's like

[59:09] oh my god

[59:10] that's so funny

[59:11] up and coming

[59:12] and I'm like

[59:13] uh what

Elliott Kalan

[59:14] who shot who

[59:17] now

[59:17] what

[59:17] but uh

Dan McCoy

[59:18] Herman C.

[59:20] Zombo

[59:20] who

[59:21] now if the

[59:22] monsters movie

[59:22] had a joke

[59:23] about up

[59:23] coming

[59:23] architect

[59:24] Stanford White

[59:24] Dan would

[59:25] be like

Elliott Kalan

[59:25] what time

[59:25] is this

[59:26] taking place

[59:26] now

[59:27] they have

[59:27] TVs

[59:28] but Stanford White

[59:29] is still a young man

Dan McCoy

[59:30] uh

[59:31] Zombo has a line

[59:32] about where he claims

[59:33] to be the most

[59:34] handsome man

[59:34] in Hollywood

[59:35] which is like

[59:36] clearly a joke

[59:37] in the context

[59:37] of the show

[59:38] but Herman's like

[59:39] hey guys

[59:40] a 7

[59:40] at best

[59:41] I'm a 10

[59:42] we should go

[59:42] to Hollywood

[59:43] it's pretty funny

[59:44] we should move to

[59:44] California

[59:45] and finally

[59:45] we have the

[59:46] premise of the

[59:46] monsters

[59:47] and this is

[59:48] like the movie

[59:49] and how far

[59:50] is this into the movie

[59:51] like an hour

[59:52] an hour and 50

[59:53] minutes long

[59:54] I would say

[59:55] that this happens

[59:55] about 30 minutes

[59:56] from the end

[59:56] and a normal film

[59:57] I think would have

[59:58] flipped the

[1:00:00] proportions of things

[1:00:01] like all of the stuff

[1:00:02] up until now

[1:00:03] would have taken

[1:00:04] 30 minutes

[1:00:04] and then the rest

[1:00:05] of the movie

[1:00:05] again

[1:00:07] Rob Zombie's

[1:00:08] interests

[1:00:09] I do find

[1:00:10] the stuff

[1:00:11] before they

[1:00:12] actually

[1:00:13] are fish out

[1:00:14] of water

[1:00:14] funnier

[1:00:15] and more interesting

[1:00:15] and more colorful

[1:00:16] than the rest

[1:00:17] of the movie

[1:00:18] but it's a weird

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:19] and I'm sure

[1:00:19] he was

[1:00:20] I think you're

[1:00:20] probably right

[1:00:21] that he was

[1:00:21] probably more

[1:00:22] interested in that

[1:00:22] stuff too

[1:00:22] like oh we can

[1:00:23] live in this weird

[1:00:24] Transylvania

[1:00:24] where there's all

[1:00:25] sorts of crazy

[1:00:25] characters

[1:00:26] and gross masks

[1:00:27] and creepy

[1:00:28] buildings

[1:00:29] with neon lights

[1:00:30] and he's putting

[1:00:31] off as long

[1:00:31] as possible

[1:00:31] when they have

[1:00:32] to actually

[1:00:32] get to

[1:00:32] Mockingbird Lane

[1:00:33] and it's just

[1:00:34] houses

S4

[1:00:34] but and I

[1:00:36] think also

[1:00:36] a typical movie

[1:00:37] of the monsters

[1:00:38] would have started

[1:00:39] with Herman's

[1:00:40] voiceover saying

[1:00:41] forget everything

[1:00:42] you thought

[1:00:43] you knew

[1:00:43] about Herman

[1:00:45] monster

[1:00:45] done

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:46] they'd show up

[1:00:48] at the house

[1:00:49] they'd show up

[1:00:49] at the house

[1:00:49] and you'd go

[1:00:49] seems like a place

[1:00:51] we wouldn't really

[1:00:52] live

[1:00:52] you're probably

[1:00:53] wondering how

[1:00:53] we got there

[1:00:54] well let's go

[1:00:54] back a little bit

[1:00:55] but I mean

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:57] I can't stress

[1:00:57] enough

[1:00:58] I can't stress

[1:00:59] enough how happy

[1:01:00] I am that this

[1:01:01] movie is not

[1:01:02] like a dark

[1:01:03] serious take

[1:01:04] on the fucking

[1:01:05] monsters

[1:01:05] which I think

[1:01:06] is what people

[1:01:06] expected

S4

[1:01:06] I forgot

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:16] they did do

[1:01:16] a dark take

[1:01:17] on the monsters

[1:01:18] which I mean

[1:01:18] as much as

[1:01:19] it's one of those

[1:01:20] things where

[1:01:20] this is me

[1:01:20] being a hypocrite

[1:01:21] again

[1:01:21] when I was a kid

[1:01:22] I was like

[1:01:23] I don't want

[1:01:23] my monsters

[1:01:24] silly

[1:01:24] I want them

[1:01:24] scary

[1:01:25] when they

[1:01:25] announced that

[1:01:25] I was like

[1:01:26] well if you're

[1:01:26] going to do

[1:01:26] the monsters

[1:01:27] why make

[1:01:27] them scary

[1:01:28] then they're

[1:01:29] just the

[1:01:29] original characters

[1:01:30] if you're

[1:01:32] going to be

[1:01:33] do them

[1:01:33] silly at least

[1:01:34] so I feel

[1:01:35] like you do

[1:01:35] have to give

[1:01:35] Rob Zombie

[1:01:36] credit for being

[1:01:36] like what

[1:01:37] are the

[1:01:37] monsters

[1:01:38] are goofy

[1:01:39] so that's

[1:01:40] what I'm

[1:01:40] going to do

[1:01:40] I'm going

[1:01:40] to make

[1:01:41] a silly

[1:01:41] thing

[1:01:41] as opposed

[1:01:42] to time

[1:01:43] to take

[1:01:43] time to

[1:01:43] take this

[1:01:44] thing for

[1:01:44] kids and

[1:01:45] make it

[1:01:45] totally

[1:01:45] scarifying

[1:01:46] and gross

[1:01:47] you know

Stuart Wellington

[1:01:47] yeah

[1:01:48] where they

[1:01:49] I don't know

[1:01:50] say fuck

[1:01:51] upon

[1:01:51] yeah

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:52] but it's

[1:01:54] the same

[1:01:54] what he did

[1:01:55] was they

[1:01:55] took old

[1:01:56] episodes of

[1:01:56] and all

[1:01:57] they did

[1:01:57] was they

[1:01:57] dubbed

[1:01:58] it

[1:01:58] swear words

[1:01:59] okay

Dan McCoy

[1:02:02] let's get

[1:02:02] back to

[1:02:02] the

[1:02:03] they call

[1:02:04] a real

[1:02:04] estate

[1:02:04] woman

[1:02:05] played by

[1:02:05] Elvira

[1:02:06] herself

[1:02:06] Cassandra

[1:02:07] Peterson

[1:02:07] to facilitate

[1:02:08] their move

[1:02:08] she says

[1:02:10] pardon me

[1:02:12] she's got a

[1:02:12] house for

[1:02:12] them

[1:02:13] they get

[1:02:14] on the

[1:02:14] plane

[1:02:14] this late

[1:02:15] in the movie

[1:02:16] we do not

[1:02:16] need to see

[1:02:17] them on the

[1:02:18] plane to

[1:02:18] America

[1:02:18] we can just

[1:02:19] go to

[1:02:20] America

[1:02:20] but we have a

[1:02:21] whole bit

[1:02:22] where they're

[1:02:22] bumped up to

[1:02:23] first class

[1:02:23] because the

[1:02:24] flight attendant

[1:02:26] was so scared

[1:02:26] of them

[1:02:27] and then like

[1:02:28] jumps off the

[1:02:28] plane and parachutes

[1:02:29] out because of

[1:02:30] it

[1:02:31] and Herman

[1:02:32] gets wasted

[1:02:33] on Shirley

[1:02:33] temples

[1:02:34] yeah

S4

[1:02:34] Air

[1:02:35] Transylvania

[1:02:36] presumably

[1:02:37] caters to

[1:02:39] Transylvanians

[1:02:40] and this is a

[1:02:41] village that is

[1:02:42] filled with

[1:02:43] goblins and

[1:02:45] witches and

[1:02:46] monsters so you

[1:02:46] would think

[1:02:47] Air Transylvania

[1:02:48] would not be

[1:02:50] surprised when

[1:02:52] somebody who

[1:02:53] looked like

[1:02:53] Herman his

[1:02:54] wife and his

[1:02:55] father-in-law get

[1:02:56] on the plane

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:56] yes

[1:02:57] that even

[1:02:58] the flight

[1:02:59] attendants might

[1:02:59] be monsters

[1:03:00] themselves

[1:03:01] you would think

[1:03:02] but no

[1:03:02] apparently Air

[1:03:04] Transylvania only

[1:03:05] deals with I

[1:03:06] guess tech

[1:03:07] workers who

[1:03:08] have moved to

[1:03:09] Transylvania because

[1:03:09] they can work from

[1:03:10] anywhere and the

[1:03:11] rents are low and

[1:03:12] so it shuttles them

[1:03:12] back and forth

[1:03:13] between Transylvania

[1:03:14] and San Francisco

[1:03:15] and they're not

[1:03:15] used to the

[1:03:16] locals

[1:03:16] yeah mainly cargo

Stuart Wellington

[1:03:17] and freight but

[1:03:18] they just recently

[1:03:19] started doing

[1:03:20] passenger service

[1:03:21] you know that's

[1:03:21] the best

[1:03:21] exclamation

[1:03:21] this is their

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:23] first passenger

[1:03:23] flight ever

Dan McCoy

[1:03:24] and I didn't

[1:03:26] mention the

[1:03:26] plot point

[1:03:26] that Cassandra

[1:03:28] Peterson is like

[1:03:29] hey apologies

[1:03:30] you know you're

[1:03:31] arriving on

[1:03:31] Halloween I'm

[1:03:33] gonna look a

[1:03:33] little weird

[1:03:33] when you show

[1:03:34] up and you

[1:03:36] know this is

[1:03:36] all to just

[1:03:37] delay the

[1:03:37] moment at

[1:03:38] which the

[1:03:38] monsters see

[1:03:39] that normal

[1:03:40] humans are

[1:03:41] surrounding them

[1:03:42] and not

[1:03:42] Transylvanian

[1:03:43] style monsters

[1:03:44] but you know

[1:03:46] they go to the

[1:03:46] real estate office

[1:03:47] she's dressed

[1:03:48] as a witch

[1:03:48] there's an

[1:03:49] animated montage

[1:03:50] of them driving

[1:03:51] to Mockingbird

[1:03:51] Heights where

[1:03:53] kids are out

[1:03:54] trick-or-treating

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:55] and this

[1:03:56] was this

[1:03:57] seems it was

[1:03:57] like wait

[1:03:58] is was this

[1:03:59] meant to be

[1:03:59] like the

[1:03:59] opening credit

[1:04:00] sequence at

[1:04:01] one point

[1:04:01] like Dan's

[1:04:02] version of the

[1:04:03] movie where

[1:04:04] there's not that

[1:04:04] much time in

[1:04:05] Transylvania and

[1:04:05] the rest of it

[1:04:06] is them getting

[1:04:06] to know their

[1:04:07] neighborhood like

[1:04:08] there's otherwise

[1:04:09] it's very strange

[1:04:10] for the movie just

[1:04:10] to turn to

[1:04:11] animation for

[1:04:12] them driving

[1:04:12] around Hollywood

[1:04:13] and I wonder if

[1:04:14] it was like a

[1:04:14] solution to the

[1:04:15] budget not

[1:04:16] allowing them to

[1:04:17] drive around

[1:04:17] actual Hollywood

[1:04:19] in costume or

[1:04:20] if it was like

[1:04:20] because it feels

[1:04:21] like suddenly the

[1:04:22] credit sequence is

[1:04:23] about to start and

[1:04:24] we're 20 minutes

[1:04:25] from the end of

[1:04:25] the movie.

Stuart Wellington

[1:04:25] But I think it's

[1:04:25] also the I mean

[1:04:27] I think it's like

[1:04:28] super stylized.

[1:04:30] Yes.

[1:04:30] Or like I think

[1:04:31] that's the point.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:32] It does fit in with

[1:04:33] that kind of like

[1:04:33] googie type of

[1:04:35] type of

Stuart Wellington

[1:04:35] throw in some

[1:04:35] fucking like surf

[1:04:36] rock in the

[1:04:36] background.

[1:04:37] that's exactly what

[1:04:38] they want to do.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:38] This is around the

[1:04:39] time too where I

[1:04:39] started wondering

[1:04:40] again what is it

[1:04:41] about kind of like

[1:04:42] goth and rockabilly

[1:04:43] stuff that seems to

[1:04:45] dovetail so much in

[1:04:47] people's minds like

[1:04:48] that if it's like I

[1:04:50] love I love gross old

[1:04:52] things and I love

[1:04:53] monsters and I love

[1:04:54] Satan but you know

[1:04:55] what I also love is

[1:04:56] early rock and roll

[1:04:57] very early rock and

[1:04:58] roll.

[1:04:58] Yeah.

[1:04:58] Like it's.

[1:04:59] I think it's the

S4

[1:05:00] center of that Venn

[1:05:01] diagram sideburns.

[1:05:03] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:05] What did they have

[1:05:06] in the 19th century

[1:05:07] and in the 1950s.

[1:05:08] You're right.

[1:05:08] Yeah.

[1:05:09] Oh that makes a lot

[1:05:09] of sense.

[1:05:10] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:10] I mean I mean I

[1:05:11] get what you're

[1:05:12] saying that you know

[1:05:13] like 20 minutes

[1:05:14] before the end to

[1:05:15] like introduce a new

[1:05:16] element is a little

[1:05:17] weird but Rob

[1:05:18] Zombie like in the

[1:05:19] trivia for this like

[1:05:20] said like oh I saw

[1:05:22] the characters I

[1:05:23] thought you know I

[1:05:24] wanted to place them

[1:05:24] in this cartoon world

[1:05:25] like that's why

[1:05:26] everything looks so

[1:05:27] stylized in a

[1:05:27] particular way.

[1:05:28] That makes sense.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:29] I mean it could

[1:05:30] also be like when

[1:05:30] they asked Orson

[1:05:31] Wells for Ciz

[1:05:32] and Cain why

[1:05:32] that.

[1:05:33] Parrot screeches

[1:05:34] right before the

[1:05:35] last scenes and

[1:05:35] he's like it's a

[1:05:36] long movie wake up

[1:05:37] the audience.

[1:05:37] They're starting to

[1:05:38] fall asleep.

[1:05:38] Like this could be

[1:05:39] a little bit of

[1:05:39] that like give the

[1:05:40] audience a little

[1:05:40] shot in the arm

[1:05:41] because you've been

[1:05:42] watching monsters

[1:05:43] bumbling around

[1:05:44] without a plot for

[1:05:45] over an hour now.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:47] But so they go

S4

[1:05:48] there.

[1:05:48] Even if even if

[1:05:49] you're on your

[1:05:49] second or third

[1:05:50] viewing you're

[1:05:53] falling asleep.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:54] And it still takes

[1:05:55] you by surprise.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:57] Yeah.

[1:05:58] They you know

[1:05:59] the Cassandra

[1:06:00] Peterson wants to

[1:06:01] sell them you know

[1:06:02] a normal house.

[1:06:02] but there's a

[1:06:03] broken down

[1:06:04] house like the

[1:06:04] Munster's home from

[1:06:05] like it looks like

[1:06:06] this home from the

[1:06:07] series.

[1:06:07] Like literally

[1:06:08] yeah it's literally

[1:06:09] they're like we

[1:06:10] want that one.

[1:06:12] and they're like don't

[1:06:14] try and you know

[1:06:15] finagle us into

[1:06:16] buying this shitty

[1:06:17] house over here.

[1:06:18] And she's like sold.

[1:06:19] No take the house.

[1:06:21] And then cut to

[1:06:22] them inside the

[1:06:23] house a little

[1:06:24] despondent because

[1:06:24] they're now broke

[1:06:25] presumably from

[1:06:26] buying this broken

[1:06:27] down house even

[1:06:29] though they're happy.

[1:06:29] A broke down

[1:06:30] palace if you will.

[1:06:31] Right before.

[1:06:32] but Herman's like I

S4

[1:06:34] but it feels like a

[1:06:35] loaded moment when

[1:06:35] they're sitting on

[1:06:36] the couch and

[1:06:37] grandpa says

[1:06:37] the count says

[1:06:39] now what?

[1:06:41] Yeah.

[1:06:41] And I feel like

[1:06:42] that's where they're

[1:06:43] at in the screenplay

[1:06:43] like what do we do

[1:06:45] now?

[1:06:46] This is the voice of

[1:06:48] the screenwriter

[1:06:49] speaking through his

[1:06:50] characters.

[1:06:50] Well luckily it's a

Dan McCoy

[1:06:51] race to the end

[1:06:52] from this point.

[1:06:53] It's a block party.

[1:06:54] A series of solutions

[1:06:55] present themselves

[1:06:56] because they hear

[1:06:59] screaming from

[1:06:59] outside.

[1:07:00] They discover there's

[1:07:01] a Halloween rave

[1:07:02] taking place.

[1:07:03] What looks like in

[1:07:04] their front yard.

[1:07:06] They party with their

[1:07:07] neighbors for a while

[1:07:08] and they're in like a

[1:07:09] cul-de-sac.

[1:07:10] Yeah.

[1:07:10] The monsters win the

[1:07:12] costume contest.

[1:07:13] But not the movie

[1:07:13] cul-de-sac.

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:14] Is that a movie?

[1:07:15] It is.

[1:07:16] It's a Roman Polanski

[1:07:17] movie but that's not

[1:07:17] this one.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:18] Weird.

[1:07:18] Why do you bring that

[1:07:19] up on this podcast?

Dan McCoy

[1:07:21] Also right now

[1:07:22] why would one bring

[1:07:23] that up close to the

[1:07:25] ending?

[1:07:26] Yeah that's a good

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:27] point.

[1:07:27] Win the costume.

[1:07:28] I think it has

[1:07:29] something to do with

[1:07:30] the schizophrenic

[1:07:30] free association that

[1:07:31] my brain just goes

[1:07:33] into and I can't

[1:07:34] really control it.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:35] Oh that's too bad.

[1:07:35] Have you?

[1:07:36] I mean you could

[1:07:37] talk to a professional

[1:07:37] about that maybe.

[1:07:38] I probably should.

[1:07:39] But that might hurt

[1:07:39] the podcast.

[1:07:40] Why would I talk to

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:41] Leon the professional

[1:07:42] about that sort of thing?

[1:07:44] Again free association.

[1:07:45] I don't know why.

[1:07:45] I don't know why I'm

[1:07:48] free associating particularly

[1:07:49] to movies directed by

[1:07:50] pedophiles but still.

[1:07:51] Yes.

[1:07:52] Why?

Dan McCoy

[1:07:53] The monsters win the

[1:07:55] costume contest.

[1:07:56] They get a giant

[1:07:57] novelty check for

[1:07:58] $1,500 which would be

[1:07:59] big money whenever this

[1:08:00] movie is taking place.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:03] And is that before or

[1:08:06] after the singing

[1:08:07] morticians offer

[1:08:08] Herman a job?

[1:08:08] Well grandpa

[1:08:08] while they're on stage

Dan McCoy

[1:08:09] grandpa's like my

[1:08:10] idiot son-in-law

[1:08:12] needs a job and then

[1:08:13] the singing morticians

[1:08:14] from the local funeral

[1:08:15] parlor offer him work

[1:08:17] right away.

[1:08:18] So I guess that

[1:08:19] problem's fixed.

[1:08:20] Next morning breakfast

[1:08:21] Herman's going to go

[1:08:22] to work.

[1:08:23] He goes out the door.

[1:08:24] He's horrified by how

[1:08:26] pretty and normal

[1:08:26] everything looks and

[1:08:28] how friendly all the

[1:08:29] neighbors are.

[1:08:31] There's like they're

[1:08:32] all they're all

[1:08:32] hideous monsters in

[1:08:33] this cul-de-sac and

[1:08:35] grandpa and Lily are

[1:08:37] also shocked but Lily

[1:08:38] scolds them for judging

[1:08:39] these horrific monsters

[1:08:41] for their clean cut

[1:08:43] appearance.

[1:08:44] And then Wolfman

[1:08:47] ex machina Lester shows

[1:08:50] up at their door.

[1:08:52] Everyone's mad at him

[1:08:53] but he says look I made

[1:08:54] a killing in Vegas for

[1:08:55] the money I got from

[1:08:56] the castle.

[1:08:57] I'm here to give you

[1:08:57] your cut.

[1:08:58] Give us Herman a

[1:08:59] check to cut it in.

[1:09:00] We don't know how

[1:09:00] much money it is but

[1:09:01] like they're all we're

[1:09:02] rich.

[1:09:02] It must be a lot because

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:04] suddenly they say they're

[1:09:06] rich.

[1:09:06] They laugh for a really

Dan McCoy

[1:09:08] long time as a shaky

[1:09:10] slow-mo cam circles them.

S4

[1:09:12] I kind of wish they'd

[1:09:14] say why is this check so

[1:09:15] small?

[1:09:16] The Americans had

[1:09:17] given us a check last

[1:09:18] night that was enormous.

[1:09:20] We assumed that is the

[1:09:21] standard issue of

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:23] American currency bank

[1:09:25] news.

[1:09:25] Proportionally and

[1:09:26] this the amount of

[1:09:27] money here is much more

[1:09:27] on that one so

[1:09:28] proportionally it should

[1:09:29] be an enormous check.

Dan McCoy

[1:09:31] And with all their

[1:09:32] problems solved we cut to

[1:09:33] black and white we

[1:09:34] finally get the monsters

[1:09:35] theme as the three main

[1:09:37] characters you know take a

[1:09:39] curtain call exiting the

[1:09:40] house and we get some

[1:09:42] animated credits and that's

[1:09:44] it.

[1:09:44] That's the monsters.

[1:09:45] That's Rob Zombie's the

[1:09:46] monsters.

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:48] I love the idea that Rob

[1:09:49] Zombie's like the movie has

[1:09:50] to take them right up to the

[1:09:51] very moment that the pilot for

[1:09:53] the monsters starts.

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:54] Yeah yeah it's the Rogue One

[1:09:56] of movies.

[1:09:58] The Rogue One of movies.

[1:10:00] Movies.

[1:10:01] Wait but Rogue One is a

[1:10:03] movie.

[1:10:03] Hold on a second.

[1:10:03] So wait did I did I say

[1:10:05] something wrong?

[1:10:06] Could be.

[1:10:07] No I'm probably right.

[1:10:09] No it's the children who are

[1:10:10] wrong.

[1:10:10] That doesn't check out.

Elliott Kalan

[1:10:13] Dan great job summarizing

[1:10:14] that was a tough one because

[1:10:15] there's no because it's a

[1:10:17] little plot.

[1:10:17] Oh yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:10:20] We should probably go right

[1:10:21] into those final judgments.

[1:10:22] Let's do final judgments

[1:10:23] whether this is a good bad

[1:10:24] movie a bad bad movie or

[1:10:25] movie kind of like I'm

[1:10:27] gonna kick it off by saying

[1:10:28] I think this is a bad bad

[1:10:30] movie like the the major

[1:10:33] problem with it is that Rob

[1:10:34] Zombie while a talented

[1:10:37] filmmaker in some ways

[1:10:38] appears to have no feeling

[1:10:39] for comedy like the pacing

[1:10:42] is laden the jokes in the

[1:10:44] screenplay that he co-wrote

[1:10:45] are bad even by like monster

[1:10:48] movie standards.

[1:10:49] But it's a bad bad movie

[1:10:51] that I'd almost kind of

[1:10:53] recommend if you have like

[1:10:55] an interest in this kind of

[1:10:56] thing checking a certain

[1:10:59] amount of it out maybe like

[1:11:00] 45 minutes get a taste of

[1:11:03] it.

[1:11:03] I just want to Dan I don't

S4

[1:11:05] want to interrupt I just I

[1:11:06] just want to flag one thing

[1:11:08] the the four other co-writers

[1:11:11] that are listed on the film are

[1:11:13] the people who developed and

[1:11:15] created the characters I think.

Stuart Wellington

[1:11:17] So Rob Zombie was the

S4

[1:11:19] soul right hand in this

[1:11:21] screenplay.

[1:11:21] Okay.

[1:11:21] So let's not let's not let

[1:11:23] Rob Zombie off easy as though

[1:11:25] a co-writer was ruining his

[1:11:27] script.

Elliott Kalan

[1:11:27] As if Rob had all these great

[1:11:29] ideas but then somebody else

[1:11:30] was just like I'll just sneak in

[1:11:32] and change these jokes later.

S4

[1:11:33] Bruce Valanche just smothered

[1:11:36] smothered his genius.

Dan McCoy

[1:11:37] That was not that was not what I

[1:11:38] was imagining.

[1:11:39] I was imagining that Rob Zombie

[1:11:41] maybe brought in someone who

[1:11:42] knew how to write a screenplay

[1:11:44] to help him along.

S4

[1:11:45] I mean there's probably an

[1:11:46] uncredited comedy writer who has a

[1:11:48] lot to account for here.

Elliott Kalan

[1:11:50] I don't know I like I wish that

[1:11:52] all I can think of now is that

[1:11:54] they probably had a punch-up

[1:11:55] room for this script at some

[1:11:56] point.

[1:11:56] I would have loved to have been

[1:11:57] in that Munster's punch-up room.

[1:11:59] Hollywood if you're doing punch-up

[1:12:00] on some dumb thing why not invite

[1:12:02] me and Dan and Stu.

[1:12:04] Kevin you can come too.

[1:12:04] Why not?

[1:12:05] Let's invite us in.

[1:12:06] We can we can come up with some

[1:12:07] some silly jokes for your reboot

[1:12:10] of I don't know like what's it

[1:12:12] what's it old TV at Thunderbird?

[1:12:13] I like you're kept a caveman

[1:12:17] 2022.

S4

[1:12:18] I imagine being in this

[1:12:19] writer's room and I'm saying

[1:12:20] Kevin for the last time we

[1:12:22] cannot say monster baiting.

[1:12:24] This is a kid's movie.

[1:12:27] Yeah, but I mean to just

[1:12:29] how about monster baiting?

[1:12:31] Is that any better?

Dan McCoy

[1:12:32] Muster baiting.

[1:12:33] Not an active verb to close it

[1:12:36] off and pass the ball.

[1:12:37] I would just say yeah, it's it's

[1:12:40] an endurance test of a movie.

[1:12:41] I wouldn't recommend actually

[1:12:43] watching it, but it has a certain

[1:12:45] charm.

[1:12:46] I will say that.

Elliott Kalan

[1:12:48] Yeah, I agree that it's not a

[1:12:50] movie I liked.

[1:12:52] I feel like I tolerated it more

[1:12:54] than I enjoyed it and I would

[1:12:55] also call it a bad movie, but at

[1:12:57] the same time it's feels fairly

[1:12:58] harmless.

[1:12:59] I feel like we had a lot of fun

[1:13:00] with the month monsters today.

[1:13:01] Yeah, but it's if you're going to

[1:13:03] watch if someone's going to make a

[1:13:05] put their heart and soul into

[1:13:06] making a monsters prequel

[1:13:09] reboot, then they're already

[1:13:11] operating under a pretty heavy

[1:13:12] burden right from the beginning

[1:13:14] and I can't you know, it's not I

[1:13:16] don't find it particularly funny,

[1:13:18] but everyone's trying their

[1:13:20] hardest and their parts that look

[1:13:21] really nice and I just imagine

[1:13:24] what could have happened.

[1:13:25] It could have been a much worse

[1:13:27] or more misbegotten movie as

[1:13:29] opposed to a movie that's just

[1:13:30] kind of like is looking for a

[1:13:31] reason to be and can't quite

[1:13:33] find it.

Stuart Wellington

[1:13:35] Guys, this is officially a movie

[1:13:38] I kind of like.

[1:13:39] What?

[1:13:39] I think all the performances are

[1:13:43] pitched at the right level.

[1:13:44] Sure, the jokes aren't very

[1:13:46] good, but again, the jokes on the

[1:13:47] fucking Munsters show aren't

[1:13:49] good.

[1:13:50] So you're saying he's being more

[1:13:51] accurate and faithful to the

[1:13:53] style of the original.

[1:13:54] And it looks interesting.

[1:13:56] It's clearly made with love.

[1:13:59] I mean, granted, yeah, there's

[1:14:00] no plot really.

[1:14:02] There's no arc.

[1:14:03] There's no real conflict.

[1:14:06] It's like a weird hang of a

[1:14:08] movie.

[1:14:10] And yeah, of course, it doesn't

[1:14:11] all work.

[1:14:12] Am I saying it's the best movie

[1:14:13] ever?

[1:14:13] No, but this is a movie I kind

[1:14:15] of liked.

[1:14:16] I wasn't mad at it.

[1:14:18] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:14:18] I like that the quote on the

[1:14:20] DVD box now is going to be

[1:14:21] dot, dot, dot.

[1:14:21] The best movie ever.

[1:14:22] Dot, dot, dot.

[1:14:23] It's for Wellington, the

[1:14:24] Flophouse.

Stuart Wellington

[1:14:24] And you know what?

[1:14:25] Hey, as long as I'm on the

[1:14:27] box, I don't care.

S4

[1:14:29] Kevin, what about you?

[1:14:30] How do you?

[1:14:32] I, you asked at the top of the

[1:14:34] show, we're finally going to pay

[1:14:35] off the question.

[1:14:36] Why did Kevin watch the Munsters

[1:14:38] in the first place?

[1:14:40] Much like with the final chapter

[1:14:42] in the Halloween series, I saw so

[1:14:45] much split debate about whether the

[1:14:47] Munsters was the worst movie ever

[1:14:49] made or actually really fun.

[1:14:51] I had to know for myself.

[1:14:53] I had to find out for myself.

[1:14:54] I watched the Munsters.

[1:14:55] I wanted to meet this movie on its

[1:14:57] own terms.

[1:14:58] I didn't want the nation to be

[1:14:59] divided because we're so divided as

[1:15:01] a nation in so many ways.

[1:15:02] I want to try to bring us together

[1:15:04] by understanding the Munsters.

[1:15:05] I feel like I want to meet the movie

[1:15:07] on its own terms and I don't know

[1:15:08] what those terms are.

[1:15:09] I don't feel like Rob Zombie has

[1:15:11] given us instruction about how to

[1:15:14] engage with this or what this is.

[1:15:15] I like, Stuart, there are parts of it

[1:15:17] that I actually laughed out loud at

[1:15:19] and I enjoyed the piano joke we

[1:15:21] mentioned.

[1:15:22] We ruined because we really didn't

[1:15:23] give it a proper setup.

[1:15:25] But it has its moments.

[1:15:26] It's kind of fun and harmless.

[1:15:28] No, no, no, no, no.

[1:15:30] I'm not pointing fingers.

[1:15:33] But I do admire Rob Zombie as a

[1:15:36] wife guy who keeps coming up with

[1:15:39] these films.

[1:15:40] A few years ago, if you ever have

[1:15:42] the opportunity to go to Blobfest

[1:15:44] in Phoenixville, Pennsylvania, it's

[1:15:46] the movie theater that the Blob

[1:15:48] attacks in the 1958 film, The Blob.

[1:15:50] They show The Blob, I think the

[1:15:52] first or second weekend every July.

[1:15:55] And they have a big three-day

[1:15:56] festival with lots of rockabilly

[1:15:58] music, Elliot, because they know

[1:16:01] that that speaks to all generations.

[1:16:03] Yep.

[1:16:04] Bring your poodle skirt.

[1:16:06] When I was there one summer, they

[1:16:09] had just announced that Rob Zombie

[1:16:10] was going to remake The Blob and

[1:16:12] everyone at Blobfest was pissed.

[1:16:14] Everyone at Blobfest was worried that

[1:16:17] Rob Zombie was going to ruin The Blob.

[1:16:19] And then that movie never happened,

[1:16:21] for better or worse.

[1:16:22] But the citizens of Phoenixville,

[1:16:24] Pennsylvania, are much relieved it never

[1:16:27] happened.

[1:16:29] Instead, he made The Munsters.

[1:16:32] And I think this might have been a

[1:16:34] better, you know, better landing

[1:16:37] ground for what he could have done

[1:16:38] next after remaking those Halloween

[1:16:40] movies.

[1:16:41] So I kind of almost liked it.

[1:16:45] I can see why people do like it.

[1:16:47] I can also see why people can't

[1:16:48] stand it and turned it off after a few

[1:16:50] minutes.

[1:16:51] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:52] I mean, I'm a little bit.

[1:16:53] If I didn't have to watch it for the

[1:16:54] podcast, I probably never would have

[1:16:56] watched it.

[1:16:57] Or if I had started watching it, I

[1:16:58] probably would have not finished it.

[1:17:00] But Rob Zombie, he's like such a

[1:17:02] curious character as a film director.

[1:17:05] Because I feel like there's a, like I

[1:17:08] want him to develop in the way that he

[1:17:10] could develop.

[1:17:11] And he's like not doing it.

[1:17:13] But I know that, I don't know if he's

[1:17:14] still doing it.

[1:17:15] He was going to do that movie based on

[1:17:17] the book Raised Eyebrows about the

[1:17:19] end of the last, you know, years or so

[1:17:21] of Groucho Marx's life.

[1:17:22] And after watching this movie, I'm like,

[1:17:24] I'm not sure if Rob Zombie is, I never

[1:17:27] knew if he was going to be a right, good

[1:17:28] fit for that.

[1:17:29] But I'm like, I'm not sure if this movie

[1:17:30] makes me less or more interested in what

[1:17:32] he would turn that into.

S4

[1:17:33] Well, you would, you would said Elliot on

[1:17:35] the Being the Ricardos episode that

[1:17:37] Aaron Sorkin is a guy who's fascinated

[1:17:39] with the machinations of comedy with no

[1:17:42] understanding of comedy.

[1:17:44] And I think there's a similar thing that

[1:17:46] Rob Zombie, when it comes to like capital

[1:17:48] C comedy, we're making a comedy, it's

[1:17:50] off the mark.

[1:17:51] But I think the funniest thing Rob Zombie

[1:17:53] ever did is in, is it in The Devil's

[1:17:57] Rejects where they bring in the movie

[1:17:59] expert to talk to the sheriff and he's

[1:18:02] played by a character actor?

[1:18:03] I think that's the one I remember.

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:05] I've got so much I can tell you about

[1:18:07] the films of Groucho.

S4

[1:18:08] And it's this hilarious scene of the

[1:18:11] police being pissed off at this movie

[1:18:13] nerd in the 1970s.

[1:18:15] It's so funny.

[1:18:17] It's great.

[1:18:19] Basically, I wish Rob Zombie had made an

[1:18:21] entire film of Marty Walker, the film

[1:18:24] critic from The Devil's Rejects.

[1:18:27] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:18:28] You never know.

[1:18:29] Maybe for the Captain Spaulding verse,

[1:18:32] maybe that'll be.

[1:18:33] Clearly, he's a guy who likes, is

[1:18:34] interested in comedy and likes comedy.

[1:18:36] But yeah, I think, I don't know if he's,

[1:18:38] if he's got the funny comes naturally to him.

[1:18:41] Probably needs a partner or a co-writer.

[1:18:44] Yeah.

[1:18:44] Again, Rob, I know you're listening to this.

[1:18:47] You're probably a huge flop fan.

[1:18:48] Just at least bring me into the punch up room.

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:50] Bring your fucking Dragula around and

[1:18:51] Elliot will hop in and you guys can go

[1:18:53] fucking make a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[1:18:54] I mean, I know I said all that stuff about

[1:18:55] rockabilly music, you know, like I like it

[1:18:57] fine.

[1:18:58] Like it's just not, I just, I always find it

[1:19:00] curious that that's the music that, that

[1:19:01] people who want to be transgressive are

[1:19:03] drawn to because it's kind of like a

[1:19:05] grandpa's version of rock and roll, but

[1:19:07] that's fine.

[1:19:07] You know, that's okay.

S4

[1:19:13] I'm sure you've noticed how giant

[1:19:15] corporations are controlling more and

[1:19:18] more about what we consume, whether it's

[1:19:20] our food, our news, or even the shows we

[1:19:23] enjoy.

Elliott Kalan

[1:19:23] The Greatest Generation is a show that

[1:19:25] stands up to big Star Trek and says, no, we

[1:19:29] can laugh about costumes that fit too

[1:19:31] tightly in the groin area.

S4

[1:19:32] We can make a Star Trek podcast that's

[1:19:34] basically only about that.

[1:19:37] The Greatest Generation, the show for free

[1:19:39] and independent thinkers about Star Trek.

[1:19:42] And the groins of different costumes.

[1:19:44] Reviewing every episode in order.

[1:19:46] So subscribe to The Greatest Generation on

[1:19:49] MaximumFun.org.

[1:19:51] You'll be doing your part in telling the

[1:19:53] Star Trek industrial complex that they can't

[1:19:55] control your mind.

Stuart Wellington

[1:19:56] Hi, it's Kevin from MaxFun HQ.

Dan McCoy

[1:20:00] This year for Giving Tuesday, we're inviting you to a super fun

[1:20:04] tarot event.

[1:20:05] It's got some of your favorite MaxFun hosts and it's for a great

[1:20:08] cause.

[1:20:09] Join Depress Modes' John Moe, Carrie Poppy of Ono, Ross, and Carrie,

[1:20:13] Stuart Wellington from the Flophouse, Tom Lum from Let's Learn Everything,

[1:20:17] and Ellen Weatherford of Just the Zoo of Us.

[1:20:20] Your suggested $10 donation supports National CASA, GAL, and their work

[1:20:24] advocating for kids in foster care.

[1:20:27] That's this Giving Tuesday, November 29th at 5 p.m. Pacific, 8 p.m. Eastern.

[1:20:32] Check out MaximumFun.org slash events for more information and tickets to the

[1:20:37] Tarot Show with John Moe.

[1:20:41] Hey, you know what?

[1:20:42] This podcast has sponsors.

[1:20:44] Don't try and claim that we don't.

[1:20:47] In addition to the support of fine listeners who have joined the Maximum Fun

[1:20:51] Network, this episode is—

[1:20:54] Who we are thankful for every day.

[1:20:55] We're very thankful for.

[1:20:56] And thank you very much for your support.

[1:20:57] Particularly because all three of us, our day jobs are, let's say, you know,

[1:21:05] constantly under threat because we chose unstable careers.

[1:21:10] I mean, Stuart seemed like the most stable until the pandemic happened, so.

[1:21:15] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:16] Let's say our careers are erratic.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:18] Yeah.

[1:21:19] Very erratic.

[1:21:20] Mm-hmm.

[1:21:21] But we're also sponsored in part by Lumi Labs.

[1:21:25] Erotic?

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:26] I mean, that's kind of the joke I was going for, but erratic.

[1:21:29] But if you are erratically erotic, then please see a sex therapist and a real one,

[1:21:34] not one of the ones that gets you involved in a web of deceit and betrayal.

Stuart Wellington

[1:21:37] Yeah.

[1:21:38] If it looks like James Spader or smells like James Spader, probably a James Spader.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:42] Yeah.

[1:21:42] We've entered the ad proper now.

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Elliott Kalan

[1:22:32] I mean, if you order them online, right?

[1:22:34] So you could be naked while you order them, while you use them.

[1:22:37] You know, use responsibly and be naked responsibly.

S4

[1:22:38] You could be naked.

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[1:22:42] Naked-wide.

Dan McCoy

[1:22:42] Yeah, there's all sorts of things you could do naked.

[1:22:44] Just do it in the comfort of your own home.

[1:22:46] Like, once you leave the house, that's when you get into some thorny legal areas.

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Elliott Kalan

[1:22:52] Yeah, Dan, what was it you were saying to me and Stuart implying that you needed us

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Dan McCoy

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[1:23:07] But again, that's microdose.com, code FLOP.

[1:23:12] Guys, is there anything you want to plug while we're in this zone?

[1:23:16] Kevin, we'll plug your book again at the end.

[1:23:19] But if you want to say anything about it now, feel free.

S4

[1:23:23] I was going to try to compare it or link it to the Monsters in some way as something that's

[1:23:29] for kids of all ages.

[1:23:31] But no, I'm not going to, I don't want it associated with Rob Zombie's Monsters in any

[1:23:35] way.

[1:23:36] It is, I'm going to give a little spoiler for the Flophouse fans right here.

[1:23:41] I'm going to hold it.

[1:23:41] Okay, wow.

[1:23:42] You heard it here first, folks.

[1:23:43] But still buy the book.

[1:23:45] Still buy the book.

[1:23:46] You definitely, definitely want to get the book.

[1:23:47] You know what?

[1:23:48] I'll take a screenshot of the Zoom.

Dan McCoy

[1:23:50] Well, actually, this visual stuff is not wasted.

S4

[1:23:54] You can see how messy my room is.

[1:23:55] To the best of my knowledge, this is the first children's picture book with an appearance

[1:24:01] by...

Stuart Wellington

[1:24:02] Oh, gay icon, the Babadook.

[1:24:04] The Babadook shows up.

[1:24:06] Yeah, the pride monster himself.

S4

[1:24:07] When we submitted the book to the publishers, Joe Dater and I, the illustrator, just assumed

[1:24:13] at some point we're going to get an email about how you can't put the Babadook into a children's

[1:24:19] picture book.

[1:24:20] And that email never came.

[1:24:22] And Joe had a substitute drawing ready to go of Santa Claus with Scooby-Doo instead.

[1:24:27] Oh, wow.

[1:24:27] And we never got notified.

[1:24:29] So let's hear it from parody law.

[1:24:30] Oh, well, they do the same.

[1:24:31] Yay.

Stuart Wellington

[1:24:32] Hopefully, Flop House superfan Jennifer Kent isn't listening to this episode.

[1:24:37] Uh-oh.

[1:24:38] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:24:39] I hope not.

[1:24:40] But I hope everyone else is listening to it.

[1:24:42] Suddenly, the fear dawned into Kevin's eyes.

[1:24:46] Don't worry.

[1:24:46] Jennifer Kent doesn't know who we are.

Stuart Wellington

[1:24:47] That was one of those moments where Stuart is trying to actualize his fantasies.

[1:24:52] That's what my therapist is having me work on, is saying what I want out loud.

[1:24:55] You've got to tell the universe.

[1:24:56] The universe doesn't know how to give it to you.

[1:24:58] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:24:59] Well, so that book, how can our audience find it?

[1:25:01] How can they get it?

S4

[1:25:03] Wherever books are sold, which is probably online where you buy your books.

[1:25:07] Right?

[1:25:08] The book, thank you, is Santa Doesn't Need Your Help by Kevin Maher, illustrated by Joe

[1:25:13] Dater.

[1:25:14] It's Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

[1:25:16] And it was originally conceived as a short film shown at a Kevin Geeks Out show last

[1:25:19] December framed in the style of a reading rainbow video with this rudimentary animation that

[1:25:26] was our justification for low rent animation.

[1:25:29] And then Joe, the illustrator, is like, I'm going to show this to my agent and he's going

[1:25:34] to see if we can sell this book.

[1:25:35] We thought it was going to be an adult humor book, which it is.

[1:25:38] It absolutely is.

[1:25:39] Or grown-up book.

[1:25:40] Not adult in a Fritz the Cat kind of way.

[1:25:42] It is a funny, funny satirical take on the holidays for grown-ups, but kids will like

[1:25:48] it too.

[1:25:49] So if you need a gift for a child, a niece, a nephew, a son, a daughter, whoever, pick up

[1:25:56] Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

Elliott Kalan

[1:25:58] It hits all four quadrants, just like the Munsters 2022, directed by Rob Zombie.

S4

[1:26:03] You know, I probably should have watched the Munsters' Scary Little Christmas because that's

[1:26:09] the Munsters' Christmas movie from the 90s.

Stuart Wellington

[1:26:11] Yeah, why don't we pause the podcast?

[1:26:13] Kevin, why don't you go watch that and come on back.

S4

[1:26:16] All right, I'm back.

[1:26:17] Anne Magnusson was great as Lily Munster.

[1:26:20] I don't know about the rest of the cast.

[1:26:22] Curiously, this film does say that the Munsters, Eddie, lived in Transylvania before moving to

[1:26:29] Los Angeles.

[1:26:30] So apparently Rob Zombie's playing a little fast and loose with the continuity as established

[1:26:34] in the 1990s reboot, the Munsters' Scary Little Christmas.

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:37] I have to assume that there's a big divide in the Munsters fandom over what's canon and

[1:26:43] what's not canon, you know?

Dan McCoy

[1:26:45] Definitely.

[1:26:46] Do you guys have anything or shall I move on to letters?

Elliott Kalan

[1:26:49] I'd love to promote two things that I love to promote always.

[1:26:53] Do you have kids?

[1:26:54] Well, after you're done buying them, Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

[1:26:56] Why don't you subscribe to the Who Was podcast?

[1:26:59] Presented by iHeart Radio, but it's available on all podcast apps.

[1:27:03] It's a podcast I co-host and it is a quiz show for kids about historical figures.

[1:27:07] It's very silly.

[1:27:09] And I think your kids will probably like it.

[1:27:11] And hey, maybe they'll even learn something.

[1:27:13] Not for kids.

[1:27:14] Don't show them this.

[1:27:15] Maniac of New York is coming back.

[1:27:16] That's right.

[1:27:17] December 7th, the first issue of Maniac of New York, Volume 3.

[1:27:20] Don't call it a comeback.

[1:27:21] The title is, yep, Kevin's holding up Maniac of New York, Volume 1.

[1:27:24] Thank you.

[1:27:25] For the listeners.

[1:27:27] To hear the sound of a book being held up to a microphone.

[1:27:32] Maniac of New York, don't call it a comeback.

[1:27:34] Number one, coming out the first.

[1:27:37] He's flipping it.

[1:27:38] He's flipping those pages.

[1:27:39] He's doing some ASMR here.

[1:27:40] Yeah.

[1:27:41] Anyway, it's coming out December 7th.

[1:27:43] Please pick up a copy for the latest installment in the Maniac of New York saga.

Stuart Wellington

[1:27:49] Yeah, I got a quick plug.

[1:27:50] Hey, you like podcasts.

[1:27:52] Why don't you check out a podcast, the Flophouse Podcast, a podcast where we talk about bad movies

[1:27:57] and make jokes.

[1:27:58] Wait a minute.

[1:28:00] I think I got this confused.

[1:28:01] I thought we were doing a Peach Pit after dark.

[1:28:03] No, this is just, yeah.

[1:28:04] Okay.

[1:28:05] Or a Peach Pit after dark.

[1:28:06] Okay, my mistake.

[1:28:07] Don't listen to the Flophouse.

Dan McCoy

[1:28:08] Wait.

[1:28:09] I mean, dude.

[1:28:10] Don't do that.

[1:28:11] Let's move on to letters.

[1:28:13] Don't do what Johnny Don't does.

[1:28:16] We've got a special mailbag.

[1:28:18] It's all about Aline, the last movie we watched.

[1:28:22] Some Francophone listeners wrote in about our questions.

[1:28:27] Oh.

[1:28:27] This one's from.

[1:28:30] So Francophone allows you to call anyone named Frank, right?

[1:28:33] This one's from Kristen, last name withheld, who lives in Montreal.

[1:28:39] Beautiful city.

[1:28:40] Kristen writes, hello, floppers.

[1:28:42] I was delighted to see you covering that complete mess of a film.

[1:28:45] Aline, and I'm happy to provide at least some of the missing context as a resident of Quebec.

[1:28:50] In terms of relevance, it's difficult to overstate how beloved Celine Dion is in Quebec.

[1:28:57] Princess Diana, before she died, is actually not a bad comparison.

[1:29:01] She is less beloved than the rest of Canada, but certainly considered an important and respected figure.

[1:29:06] Like, you could make her an ambassador somewhere, and it would be a bit funny, but not very.

[1:29:14] As this movie.

[1:29:15] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[1:29:17] Unless she was the ambassador to the Vatican, which apparently is hilarious when French-Canadian people say it.

[1:29:23] We didn't pick up the joke.

Dan McCoy

[1:29:24] As this movie was actually made in France and not Quebec, it thus trades on a lot of stereotypes about French-Canadians.

[1:29:30] They speak with a silly accent.

[1:29:32] They have too many babies.

[1:29:34] They are controlled by the church.

[1:29:36] They are tacky.

[1:29:37] Remember the bit where Aline and her sister are cooing over an Ann Geddes calendar?

[1:29:42] That's in there to say, look at these ignorant hicks.

[1:29:45] Nevertheless, this movie was a big hit here and did well in theaters.

[1:29:49] As a woman in her 40s living in Montreal, Google is convinced that I am a Celine Dion superfan

[1:29:55] and will not stop recommending stories to me about how mad the Dion's are about this film.

[1:30:01] One article quoted a Dion as saying it made them look like a bunch of bougeons, grunters, or hicks, which is not wrong.

[1:30:10] I think Valérie LeMercier stoked up the controversy to get more publicity for her movie

[1:30:15] since I also saw a bunch of stories where she was speculating about Celine's health

[1:30:20] and whether her family is controlling her and stuff like that.

[1:30:24] I have a friend who were –

Elliott Kalan

[1:30:25] And how did Celine Dion's brother, Dion Sanders, feel about it?

[1:30:29] Yeah, that's a good question.

Dan McCoy

[1:30:31] Well, it's outside the scope of this email.

[1:30:35] Again, you can't ask an email a question and have it answer your back.

[1:30:38] Email, email. I have a follow-up question. Email.

[1:30:42] It doesn't work like that.

[1:30:43] It's not going to work.

[1:30:44] I have a friend who refers to Celine Dion's marriage as a hashtag MeToo story with a happy ending.

[1:30:48] I'm not sure what it's like in France, but romances between men in their 50s and women in their late teens, early 20s

[1:30:54] are generally considered creepy and inappropriate here as well.

[1:30:58] Can't chalk this one up to cultural differences.

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:01] What if the women in their late teens, early 20s are being played by a woman in their 50s?

[1:31:05] So the age difference is almost unidentifiable.

Dan McCoy

[1:31:08] Yeah, that's a good point.

[1:31:09] Seems like it goes almost the other way at points.

[1:31:13] If you have any more questions about Celine Dion and her place in Quebecois culture, please ask.

[1:31:18] I will be happy to act as your official Celine Dion correspondent.

[1:31:23] Corge le mot.

[1:31:24] Okay, you got the job.

[1:31:25] Kristen.

[1:31:27] Well, Kristen may have the job, but we also have something from Roxanne last name withheld.

[1:31:31] Oh, I spoke too soon.

[1:31:33] You mean we have a letter from Roxanne?

[1:31:36] I knew you were going to do that.

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:38] That's a reference to a song.

[1:31:39] Yeah, you don't have to wear that dress.

S4

[1:31:40] That's a reference to a Steve Martin movie.

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:44] That's a reference to Zeus and Roxanne, the story of a dolphin and a dog who has sex.

[1:31:48] Steve Martin was in that?

[1:31:50] Yeah, he played Zeus, I think.

[1:31:52] Wow.

Stuart Wellington

[1:31:53] That's the dog.

Elliott Kalan

[1:31:54] I think so.

S4

[1:31:56] Dan?

[1:31:57] I know that Andre is a seal.

[1:31:59] Not Tom Tiny Lester as Zeus.

[1:32:03] Thanks for clarifying.

Stuart Wellington

[1:32:06] Because he was the enemy of Rip, played by Hulk Hogan.

Elliott Kalan

[1:32:09] Yeah, yeah.

[1:32:10] I remember in the Mad Magazine parody of that movie, he was called Zeus because they said

[1:32:15] he smelled like an animal.

[1:32:16] I don't remember anything about any plot of any episode of The Monsters.

Dan McCoy

[1:32:20] I briefly was like, oh, I need to reset that this is from Roxanne last name withheld.

[1:32:25] Then I remembered that the whole digression was about Roxanne.

[1:32:28] Yeah, it was about how she's named Roxanne.

[1:32:30] Hi.

[1:32:31] As a longtime Lester from Quebec and a diehard Celine fan, we all have to be at birth.

[1:32:36] I was so excited to see you were doing Aline.

[1:32:39] I think the funniest thing for us about the movie is that it's obviously a French person's

[1:32:42] from France perspective on Quebec culture.

[1:32:46] The Vatican bit is probably in there because they tend to make fun of how we speak and they

[1:32:49] thought it was funny.

[1:32:50] Hence why the movie was successful in France, but not so much in Quebec.

[1:32:54] I perceived it as an obvious dig at our accent like that was the joke.

[1:32:58] Composite names are popular here like Jean-Philippe, Marc Olivier, etc.

[1:33:03] But the sibling's name really made me cackle out loud while watching this on the plane.

[1:33:08] I've never heard of anyone named Jean Bobin or Guy Claude.

[1:33:12] Also, the town where the family is from seems to look more like a colonial Nouvelle France

[1:33:18] instead of Quebec in the 20th century.

[1:33:20] And finally, Aline is clearly played by someone from France.

[1:33:24] Her QC accent goes downhill real fast.

[1:33:28] Anyway, all this is to say this is not representative of French-Canadian culture.

[1:33:32] If they had shown the sex scene, I'm assuming they would have had Aline and Guy Claude playing

[1:33:37] wooden spoons on each other's bodies.

[1:33:40] Roxanne, last name withheld.

[1:33:41] I assume that's a reference that I also don't get.

Stuart Wellington

[1:33:45] To what, like Manon of the Spring or something?

Elliott Kalan

[1:33:47] I mean, my guess, yeah, if they had, I'm surprised now that there wasn't a scene where they were

[1:33:51] kind of like flirtatiously eating poutine together.

Dan McCoy

[1:33:55] No, it is interesting to see how much of this movie is apparently just France being like,

[1:34:01] look at these, look at these colonial picks.

[1:34:04] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:34:04] I love also that that went completely over our heads.

[1:34:08] Yeah.

[1:34:08] And it's something, as Americans, I feel like we always need to be reminded that other countries

[1:34:12] can have relationships with each other that America is not a part of.

[1:34:15] And whenever there, it's like, it's like Sweden and Swaziland are having a diplomatic row

[1:34:20] and I'm like, why would they even know each other?

[1:34:22] I don't understand.

[1:34:23] Like, it's easy to forget the rest of the world.

[1:34:26] Yeah, exactly.

[1:34:28] So, but I'm loving having my eyes opened to all these nuances.

[1:34:33] Yeah.

[1:34:34] Yeah.

[1:34:34] What else you got for us, Dan?

[1:34:35] A new world.

[1:34:35] That's it.

[1:34:37] Oh, wow.

[1:34:38] We're done with that part.

[1:34:38] All right.

[1:34:38] So the journey of exploration is over.

[1:34:41] Yeah, our cultural exchange has ended.

[1:34:43] So unlike a normal Campbell quest where it would be kind of like the first gatekeeper

[1:34:49] and the second gatekeeper and the meeting with the goddess and then eventually return home,

[1:34:52] this was just kind of step outside and check the weather and then go back inside again.

[1:34:55] Yeah, great.

[1:34:56] Yeah, that's the hero's journey we were on.

[1:34:57] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:34:57] Well, that's all I have the energy for.

[1:34:59] That's the hero's, you know, sort of stroll around the clock.

[1:35:03] The hero's ample.

[1:35:05] Okay, well, let's move on to the final Flophouse segment.

[1:35:10] You've all grown to know and love.

[1:35:12] Recommendations.

[1:35:12] Movies that might be a better use of your time than The Munsters.

[1:35:19] I'm going to recommend, I saw Ega.

[1:35:24] It's an Indian movie by the director of RRR.

[1:35:28] Ega is the-

[1:35:29] So not Ega, the 60s movie about a caveman starring Richard Keough.

[1:35:33] This is E-E-G-A.

[1:35:35] There's no H at the end of this.

[1:35:37] It is the Telugu word for fly because this is a comedy action romance movie about a man who is killed by his romantic rival

[1:35:50] and then comes back as a fly to take revenge and to continue wooing his former lost love as a fly.

[1:36:02] And oh boy, what a fun movie.

[1:36:06] Like, I did not get to see RRR in theaters.

[1:36:10] I still haven't seen it in general because I keep hoping that, like, I can make it to one of the screenings that still pops up here in New York from time to time.

[1:36:19] But if you ever want a movie about a love story with a fly, a fly that-

[1:36:26] By the way, also, like, I saw someone online make a very smart point that if this was an American movie,

[1:36:33] they're like, okay, the guy comes back as a fly, we have to hear the fly's thoughts.

[1:36:37] No, we don't hear the fly's thoughts.

[1:36:39] The fly's a fly.

[1:36:40] The fly, like, it lives between, like, realistic CGI fly and cartoon fly.

[1:36:47] But it does what a fly does, except for a fly who is also a human who understands human things.

[1:36:55] And, like, there's a fly training montage.

[1:36:56] That's how I sold it to Audrey when I came home.

[1:36:58] I said three words, fly training montage.

[1:37:01] It's a lot of fun.

[1:37:03] Yeah, you're just going to enjoy it.

[1:37:06] Go ahead and see it.

[1:37:07] See you guys.

[1:37:09] That's my recommendation.

[1:37:10] That sounds great.

Stuart Wellington

[1:37:11] I'm going to recommend a movie I watched on the plane out to L.A.

[1:37:15] I'm recording on the road, folks.

[1:37:18] Sitting next to my pal, Elliot Kalin, here in sunny Los Angeles.

[1:37:23] Yesterday, I went to Universal Studios, went on the studio tour, and there was a really great little section on Nope.

[1:37:29] It was awesome.

[1:37:30] But that's not what I'm here to recommend.

[1:37:32] I'm here to recommend other stuff, specifically a movie.

[1:37:34] A movie called The Square, directed by Ruben Ostland, who's currently got a movie in theaters right now called Triangle of Sadness.

[1:37:41] The Square is kind of a, well, it's long, and it's kind of a skewering of, like, the fine art world and also kind of, like, well-intentioned charity

[1:37:55] on the behalf of shallow rich people.

[1:38:00] It follows a museum curator played by Clay Spang, or Clay Spong, who was in The Northmen and also recently.

[1:38:11] Bad Sisters.

[1:38:11] Bad Sisters playing one of the biggest pieces of shit I've ever seen on television.

[1:38:17] He's so terrible.

[1:38:17] He's, like, so terrible.

[1:38:19] Like, within the, like, there's no spoiler that this character dies, but within, like, two minutes of the first episode, you're like, this motherfucker needs to go.

[1:38:27] And as you said to me when you were talking about it, that's before he starts doing some really wild shit.

[1:38:33] Yes.

[1:38:35] He calls his wife Mammy once, and I'm like, I would chop his fucking head off.

[1:38:42] But so he plays the lead in this, and he is also, like, a piece of shit in this.

[1:38:48] But there's a little more depth, I guess.

[1:38:50] He's less of a comic villain.

[1:38:53] And it's great.

[1:38:54] And even though it's kind of a bludgeon at times, I feel like it gives you enough stuff to think about, but without exactly giving you a clear answer.

[1:39:05] And it also has a very crazy scene where a character is a fine arts performer is doing, like, a performance art piece where he is imitating a chimpanzee, and it goes disastrously wrong.

[1:39:21] It's intense.

[1:39:22] Quite a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[1:39:23] So, The Square.

[1:39:24] Check it out.

[1:39:25] I'm going to recommend a movie, too.

[1:39:27] How about that?

[1:39:27] I'm also recommending movies.

[1:39:29] I'll jump on this bandwagon.

[1:39:30] I'm going to recommend a movie from 1951.

[1:39:32] This was directed by Anthony Mann, and it's a movie called The Tall Target.

[1:39:35] Now, you know me.

[1:39:36] I love history.

[1:39:37] I love Abraham Lincoln.

[1:39:38] I also love 50s crime thrillers.

[1:39:40] What if they could all be put together into one movie?

[1:39:43] This is finally it.

[1:39:44] This is the suspense thriller in which Dick Powell is a New York policeman who knows that there is a plot to assassinate President-elect Abraham Lincoln on the train to Washington.

[1:39:54] And he's got to find out who's behind it and stop them before they can change the course of history, although he doesn't know how history is supposed to happen.

[1:40:03] It's 1861.

[1:40:04] He doesn't know.

[1:40:06] It's a real fun movie.

[1:40:08] It moves real fast, and it's got fight scenes on trains, and I love those.

[1:40:14] And it's a movie that manages to be about history without feeling kind of stuffy and without feeling, like, too respectful of the time.

[1:40:25] Throughout On the Train, ordinary people are constantly disagreeing about Lincoln and whether there's going to be war and if there is, whether it's good or not.

[1:40:32] And it felt very relevant right now, you know, watching it in the months leading up to this most recent election.

[1:40:39] It was like people – it felt like being in a place where you can't quite say your political opinion out loud because someone's going to argue with you and you don't know whose side everybody is on because that's what it was like.

[1:40:49] And that's kind of what it feels like nowadays.

Stuart Wellington

[1:40:50] And kind of how it felt like when I came into this podcast where you were talking about the monsters.

[1:40:55] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[1:40:55] I hope this is – I hope you still felt this was a safe space to talk about your liking of the monsters.

Stuart Wellington

[1:41:00] Yeah, because you guys are pretty understanding when I have an opinion you don't agree with.

Elliott Kalan

[1:41:04] I mean, not usually.

[1:41:06] But I really enjoyed The Tall Target, and there is one moment in it that I would really like someone to sample where they stop in Baltimore, and this lady, she – there's a kid selling newspapers.

[1:41:17] And this lady goes, is it war?

[1:41:19] And the kid goes, no, ma'am, it's Baltimore.

[1:41:21] And the way that he says it, because it is so funny, and I want some Baltimore-based hip-hop group to sample that at the beginning of something.

[1:41:28] I think it's just a great back and forth.

[1:41:31] But Tall Target is just a fun movie in a way that historical movies sometimes aren't, and yet feels kind of relevant at the same time.

[1:41:39] And there's fight scenes on trains.

[1:41:41] I don't know why you're not watching it right now.

[1:41:43] Wait, yes, I know.

[1:41:44] Because Kevin's going to recommend a movie.

S4

[1:41:46] You know, October, you're watching a lot of scary movies, right?

[1:41:49] I didn't.

[1:41:50] I fell behind.

[1:41:51] Constantly.

[1:41:51] So I made up for it by watching one incredible movie, which had just somehow escaped my radar from 1981 from the director of the later Planet of the Apes films, J. Lee Thompson, 1981's Happy Birthday to Me.

[1:42:09] You know, the one with the shish kebab on the cover.

[1:42:12] It's great.

[1:42:13] It's well-made.

[1:42:14] It's like an American giallo.

[1:42:16] But not too much.

[1:42:18] It's not trying too hard to be that.

[1:42:19] And it was just like a very well-made, suspenseful, mystery, horror, slasher film with not one but two cast members of the movie Meatballs showing up.

[1:42:31] I always love seeing the campers from Camp North Star show up in other Canadian movies.

[1:42:37] This one had not one but two.

[1:42:39] So highly recommended.

[1:42:41] A lot of fun.

[1:42:41] If, like me, you kind of dismissed it, it's worth your time.

[1:42:46] Based on the box cover.

Dan McCoy

[1:42:47] Based on the box cover.

[1:42:48] I also –

[1:42:49] I watched that recently as well, and I just – I had a great time.

[1:42:54] And it – like with that kind of jello or jello like influenced movie.

[1:43:00] Jello.

[1:43:00] There's always room for it.

[1:43:02] The wilder the explanation for everything, the happier I am, and it is nutty.

S4

[1:43:07] Oh, it gets totally bonkers at the end.

[1:43:10] And, you know, this is a bad movie podcast.

[1:43:12] I belong to a bad movie group.

[1:43:13] We watch a movie on Monday nights occasionally.

[1:43:16] I don't know if you guys have ever seen it, but last week we watched a film called Georgia Rule, which I'm going to walk you guys through.

[1:43:23] I'm kidding.

[1:43:23] This is just a joke.

[1:43:25] Just a joke.

[1:43:26] Okay.

[1:43:27] Yikes.

[1:43:27] But I watched the movie, and then I – I watched the movie, and then I went back and heard the episode.

[1:43:32] Stuart puts on parachute.

[1:43:33] I heard the episode.

[1:43:35] Oh, my God, guys.

[1:43:36] That was –

[1:43:37] Yeah.

[1:43:38] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[1:43:39] It's a movie – I feel like there's a – I feel like there's an oral history done by – what's her name?

[1:43:44] That Russian author who won the Nobel Prize for literature.

[1:43:46] She does oral history.

[1:43:47] It's an oral history of people who went to see Georgia Rule thinking it was going to be a light-hearted comedy and not being prepared for what it was actually about.

Dan McCoy

[1:43:54] Yeah.

[1:43:55] Oh, man.

[1:43:55] Hey, before we do our normal sign-off stuff and plug Kevin's book one more time, there's an announcement I would like to make of a Flophouse contest, contest, contest, contest, contest.

[1:44:08] Our producer –

[1:44:10] Dan, don't fall down that – oh, no.

Elliott Kalan

[1:44:11] Don't fall that tunnel or that pit.

Dan McCoy

[1:44:13] Luckily, my microphone fell down with me, so I can continue talking to you.

[1:44:18] Oh, good.

[1:44:19] Our producer, Alex Smith, a wonderful producer, does music under the name Howl Dottie and has his own podcast called Howl Dottie's Fast Track, where the premise is that he and his guests will write lyrics to a song in half an hour.

[1:44:33] Then Alex writes music for that song and kicks it back to the guests to do the vocal tracks.

[1:44:38] And the three of us were on the show recently.

[1:44:41] We did a song called Sexy Xenomorph, which was about Stuart having an illicit encounter with the titular Sexy Xenomorph.

[1:44:50] And I got to say, we're pretty proud of how it turned out.

[1:44:53] It's actually a really good song.

[1:44:55] So we're going to do another Flophouse contest for listeners to make a music video for Sexy Xenomorph.

[1:45:02] Alex is going to drop the song in somewhere at the end of this episode, and there will also be a link in the show notes so people can just download the track on its own.

[1:45:12] So if you want to enter the contest, what you do is you make a music video for the song.

[1:45:18] You can do whatever you want, live action, animation, puppets, use old footage and re-edit it, whatever suits you.

Elliott Kalan

[1:45:26] Go into the studio archives, get the Xenomorph costume, put it on, dance around in it.

[1:45:32] We can't stop you.

Dan McCoy

[1:45:33] We wouldn't want to.

[1:45:35] Once you've done your video, upload it as a public video on YouTube with the words Sexy Xenomorph somewhere in the title and somewhere in the video or just –

[1:45:46] Dan, your search is going to bring up a lot of interesting results.

[1:45:48] No, no, no.

[1:45:49] It's not for the search.

[1:45:50] It's just identification.

[1:45:51] But have Sexy Xenomorph somewhere in the title and somewhere in the video or video description, whichever.

[1:45:59] Just credit the music to Howl Dottie's Fast Track and the Flophouse podcast.

[1:46:03] Then once it's uploaded, email a link to us at flophousepodcast at gmail.com with a subject line, Sexy Xenomorph Podcast.

[1:46:17] It occurred to me how funny that is.

[1:46:22] Sexy Xenomorph Contest.

[1:46:23] So yes, Flophouse Podcast.

Stuart Wellington

[1:46:25] So Sexy Xenomorph Contest in the subject line.

Dan McCoy

[1:46:27] Sexy Xenomorph Contest.

[1:46:28] At gmail.com with a subject line, Sexy Xenomorph Contest.

[1:46:31] Contest, sorry.

[1:46:33] Context.

[1:46:33] What's the context?

[1:46:34] Context is the contest.

Stuart Wellington

[1:46:36] So the context is that, yeah, there's a contest about a song where I have an illicit relationship with a –

Dan McCoy

[1:46:42] That explains a lot.

[1:46:43] Because this is a little more complex, you know, you have to make an actual video.

[1:46:46] We're going to be accepting entries up to the stroke of midnight on New Year's Eve.

[1:46:52] So as long as you get it in, in 2020, we will take a look once we have –

[1:46:57] I mean 2022.

[1:46:58] 2022, sorry.

[1:46:59] Oh, God.

Elliott Kalan

[1:47:01] Once we have all the entries –

[1:47:03] Everyone, don't worry.

[1:47:03] You did not miss the deadline by two years.

Dan McCoy

[1:47:06] Once we have all the entries, we'll pick our favorite ones somewhere between five and ten depending on how many entries we get.

[1:47:12] And then we'll set up a page of like those semifinalists on our website where you, the listener, can vote on the ultimate winner.

[1:47:21] And, you know, like that we'll figure out a little later, but we'll probably keep that voting open through January.

[1:47:26] The winner will get a Flophouse prize pack and get to pick a movie for us to cover.

[1:47:33] So don't worry if you've missed some of the rules.

[1:47:36] I'll put this in the show notes and on the website.

[1:47:38] And you can also rewind the – this is a podcast.

[1:47:42] It's on your phone or whatever.

[1:47:44] You can go back and listen to it again.

[1:47:46] That's the other option.

Elliott Kalan

[1:47:47] Yeah, don't worry.

[1:47:48] These memories aren't going to disappear like tears in the rain.

[1:47:50] You can go back and relive them again.

Dan McCoy

[1:47:53] So that's the sexy Xenomorph contest.

[1:47:54] But attack ships will be on fire.

Elliott Kalan

[1:47:56] Yeah, attack ships will be on fire.

[1:47:57] Yeah, sea beams off the shoulder of whatever.

[1:48:00] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:48:01] But that's it.

[1:48:03] We want to thank Kevin Marr for being our guest.

[1:48:06] We want to plug Santa Doesn't Need Your Help.

[1:48:08] This is such a treat.

[1:48:09] Thanks so much, Kevin.

Elliott Kalan

[1:48:10] Yeah, thank you, Kevin.

[1:48:11] This was great.

[1:48:11] Thank you, guys.

[1:48:12] Thank you for watching the Munsters movie 10 or 11 times for us.

[1:48:16] We really appreciate that.

Stuart Wellington

[1:48:17] And Dan.

[1:48:18] Dan, what a great job summarizing.

[1:48:20] Let's do a round of applause.

[1:48:21] Alex, throw a round of applause.

[1:48:22] Yeah, let's hear it for the boy.

[1:48:23] You can give me a thank you, buddy.

[1:48:24] Oh, I think the boys heard it enough, okay?

Dan McCoy

[1:48:27] I just want to ask, I don't want to spoil too much of your book, but I don't know whether

[1:48:32] we even set up the premise of like...

S4

[1:48:34] Spoiled.

[1:48:35] Yeah, I'm happy to walk people through it.

[1:48:37] The idea is it's the night before Christmas Eve, a K-pop band comes to the North Pole to say

[1:48:45] this year they will take over for Santa and save Christmas.

[1:48:49] And Santa Claus is realizing year after year, someone from pop culture shows up to save Christmas

[1:48:56] and he has not gone out in over 20 years.

[1:48:58] So he decides he is tired of being talked down to like people think he can't do his job.

[1:49:04] He's going to go out and do it himself.

[1:49:05] As it turns out, Santa has gotten a little old and a little out of practice and has a very

[1:49:10] difficult Christmas Eve night.

[1:49:12] Yeah.

[1:49:12] So it is a struggle.

[1:49:14] It is hilarious.

[1:49:17] And it's got a lot of good pop culture stuff.

[1:49:19] If you enjoy Rankin Bass Christmas specials or just any of the old Christmas specials, I

[1:49:24] think you'll enjoy some of the humor in here.

[1:49:27] Beautifully illustrated by Joe Dater, who's a New Yorker cartoonist.

[1:49:30] He has a great sense of composition, how to like tell a story in a single frame.

[1:49:34] So every page has some great stuff going on.

[1:49:38] And it's all written in rhyme.

[1:49:40] So you'll enjoy getting to read it out loud if that's your thing.

Dan McCoy

[1:49:45] Great.

[1:49:46] Yeah.

[1:49:47] Yes.

[1:49:48] I have a copy.

[1:49:48] It's great.

[1:49:49] It's great.

[1:49:50] Well, that's it.

[1:49:51] I'd like to thank our network, Maximum Fun.

[1:49:53] Go to MaximumFun.org.

[1:49:55] Check out the other great podcasts on the network.

[1:49:57] If you like our show, please give us a rating on iTunes.

[1:50:02] Write a review.

[1:50:02] It does help the way that they have everything set up.

[1:50:05] If you don't like it, maybe just give in to your national impulse to be lazy and not

[1:50:10] do anything about that.

[1:50:12] Yeah, do that.

[1:50:13] And thank you.

Elliott Kalan

[1:50:14] Yeah.

[1:50:14] Why does everyone always need an opinion on everything?

[1:50:16] Yeah.

[1:50:16] You know, if you don't like the podcast, just kind of just remove it from your mind.

[1:50:19] But if you do like it, maybe hire someone to sky write about over a major metropolitan city.

[1:50:25] Yeah.

[1:50:26] Maybe do that.

[1:50:27] Yeah.

[1:50:28] If you could pay for the bubble system, that would be great.

Dan McCoy

[1:50:31] If you're an eccentric millionaire with money to burn, why not help us out?

[1:50:34] But anyway.

[1:50:35] Or a rational millionaire with money to burn.

Elliott Kalan

[1:50:38] We'll accept it from any kind of millionaire.

[1:50:40] Thank you again.

[1:50:41] Not billionaires, though.

[1:50:42] No, no.

[1:50:42] Billionaires, you can go stuff yourself.

Dan McCoy

[1:50:44] To Alex Smith, our producer of the Howl Doughty Fast Track.

[1:50:49] Thank you for making it sound good.

[1:50:51] And for the Flophouse, I've been Dan McCoy.

Elliott Kalan

[1:50:55] Hey, I've been Stuart Wellington.

[1:50:58] This is Elliot Kalin, the real monster.

[1:51:00] And joining us has been...

[1:51:02] Kevin Marr.

Dan McCoy

[1:51:04] Bye.

[1:51:05] Bye.

[1:51:06] Bye.

Elliott Kalan

[1:51:36] Bye.

Stuart Wellington

[1:52:06] Bye.

S5

[1:52:36] I'm shaking like a leaf, but I gotta stay cool.

Stuart Wellington

[1:52:52] And I don't want to get burnt by her acidic drool.

[1:52:57] I touch her skeletal knee and say, hello.

[1:53:02] Gesture to the door and say, let's go.

Elliott Kalan

[1:53:07] They slipped up the back.

[1:53:08] He was the luckiest of men.

[1:53:09] Little did he know he'd never see him again.

[1:53:11] She stole his heart and ripped him in two.

[1:53:14] Played an egg in his tummy.

[1:53:15] Don't let this happen to you.

[1:53:16] Don't let this happen to you.

S5

[1:53:17] She was a xenomorph.

[1:53:20] Xenomorph.

[1:53:21] Super sexy xenomorph.

[1:53:23] Sexy xenomorph.

[1:53:24] So dangerous.

[1:53:33] So dangerous.

S5

[1:53:50] Oh.

[1:53:51] Oh yeah.

[1:53:52] No.

[1:53:53] No.

Stuart Wellington

[1:53:54] No.

[1:53:55] No.

[1:53:56] No.

Stuart Wellington

[1:53:56] No.

[1:53:57] No.

Stuart Wellington

[1:53:57] No.

[1:53:58] It's.

Stuart Wellington

[1:53:58] It's cool.

[1:53:59] No.

Stuart Wellington

[1:53:59] No one else is around.

[1:54:00] It's just me and you.

[1:54:01] No.

[1:54:02] No.

[1:54:03] The lights are.

[1:54:04] I want to see you.

[1:54:05] Oh ho.

[1:54:06] Oh.

[1:54:07] There is a second face.

[1:54:09] Oh.

[1:54:10] For me?

[1:54:11] What's that'd be?

S5

[1:54:41] Xenomorph, Xenomorph, super sexy Xenomorph, so dangerous

[1:54:47] Super sexy Xenomorph, Xenomorph, super sexy Xenomorph, sexy Xenomorph

[1:54:55] It was worth it

Ep #383 - The Munsters, with Kevin Maher

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