FH Mini 154 - Dan Explains Jem

[0:00] Hey, everyone, and welcome to the Flophouse.

Dan McCoy

[0:06] I'm Dan McCoy.

[0:08] I'm Stuart Wellington.

Elliott Kalan

[0:10] And over here on the other side of the country,

[0:12] it's your old pal, Elliot Kalin.

Stuart Wellington

[0:14] East versus West forever.

[0:17] What?

[0:18] You're East plus West?

[0:20] Okay.

[0:20] I didn't know this was an adversarial.

Elliott Kalan

[0:22] There's an East-West Flophouse rivalry,

[0:24] but it's between the hosts of the show.

[0:26] It's not between us and another podcast.

Dan McCoy

[0:28] Okay.

[0:29] Okay, well, I'll have to adjust my whole attitude about things.

[0:33] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[0:35] Change your whole latitude.

[0:37] Drink whatever beer goes with that.

[0:39] Corona.

[0:40] Corona, thank you.

[0:41] It would be longitude.

Stuart Wellington

[0:42] Well, and also latitude.

Elliott Kalan

[0:43] Or is that find your beach?

[0:46] I loved how Dan so quickly undercut his correction of that.

Dan McCoy

[0:52] Yeah, I'm like, well, you know, you live southerly of us as well as...

[0:56] It is a different latitude.

[0:57] Westerly.

Elliott Kalan

[0:58] And only one of them rhymes with attitude.

[1:00] Mm-hmm.

[1:01] Angitude.

[1:04] This guy's got a bad angitude.

Dan McCoy

[1:06] This is the Flophouse, the show with a lot of baditude.

[1:10] And I'm going to level with you beautiful listeners out there and all listeners,

[1:16] not just the beautiful ones.

[1:17] Wow.

Stuart Wellington

[1:19] Oh, man.

[1:20] You're all beautiful.

[1:22] Dan is not really...

[1:23] You're all beautiful.

Stuart Wellington

[1:23] You're all warmed up is how I would describe Dan.

Elliott Kalan

[1:26] I would say Dan is insecure in his statements today.

[1:30] He feels the need to qualify them.

[1:32] Unlike regular Dan.

Stuart Wellington

[1:35] Well, perhaps...

[1:36] Who always stands his ground.

[1:38] Perhaps the revelation...

[1:39] Yeah, that's why I don't run into his house unannounced.

[1:42] Don't do it.

[1:43] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:43] Perhaps the revelation I was about to spring will explain a lot of the attitude, not the

[1:48] bad attitude, but the attitude of this episode, which is that...

Elliott Kalan

[1:51] Oh, that's how you've been huffing glue right before the recording?

Dan McCoy

[1:54] Number one, thanks to, you know, various adjustments we've made for summer trips.

[2:00] Mm-hmm.

[2:01] We haven't taped a show in a while.

[2:05] And we are only doing the one tonight.

[2:08] And it is late at night.

[2:10] It's been a while since we've done a late night record.

[2:12] So things are a little silly right off the bat.

[2:15] And rusty.

[2:16] Silly and rusty.

[2:18] The Flophouse.

[2:20] The old Flophouse gang, silly and rusty.

Elliott Kalan

[2:22] The old vaudeville team of silly and rusty.

[2:27] I'm liable to slip on anything.

[2:29] And I'm a rusty nail.

[2:30] You know how this act goes.

Dan McCoy

[2:33] Dangerous stuff.

[2:33] Yeah.

[2:34] I mean, it's educational, too.

[2:35] It tells you a lot about Lockjaw.

[2:38] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[2:38] They were called the Tetanus, too.

[2:40] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[2:41] So this is the Flophouse.

[2:43] And, of course, on the Flophouse...

Elliott Kalan

[2:45] So we've established that.

[2:47] We've established this is the Flophouse.

Dan McCoy

[2:48] I think we can move on.

[2:50] On the Flophouse, we talk about bad movies.

[2:53] We watch one.

[2:54] We talk about it.

[2:55] But what's this?

[2:57] Another twist.

[2:57] We talk the shit out of it, usually.

[2:58] Another twist.

[2:59] This is a Flophouse mini.

[3:01] Our off-week episodes where things get a little more free form.

[3:04] And I'm in charge.

[3:05] So that first part you can ignore.

[3:08] Yeah.

[3:09] Throw it in the trash.

[3:10] No, that was just for new listeners who might be like,

[3:12] Oh, maybe this episode isn't the one.

[3:14] We'll need to.

Elliott Kalan

[3:16] Yeah.

[3:16] Let's give them a trial by fire right off the bat.

[3:18] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[3:19] But for the real sickos, here we go.

[3:23] I'm going to share my screen.

Elliott Kalan

[3:25] Oh, you Cormac McCarthy's out there.

[3:27] This is going to be twisted.

Dan McCoy

[3:29] I made a little, what do you call it, a visual aid for this one.

Elliott Kalan

[3:34] That'll be great for the listeners at home.

Dan McCoy

[3:37] Wait, I'm the final person to do a PowerPoint for one of these.

[3:43] A lower dump.

[3:44] That's true.

Elliott Kalan

[3:45] I think I once made a memorial video to show to you guys during one of these.

[3:51] And the audience just got to hear it, right?

[3:53] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[3:53] My favorite is when we're like, yeah, so I made this thing that is only for us,

[3:59] but we'll probably share it in some way for the listeners.

[4:02] We never do.

[4:02] And we never do.

[4:03] No.

Elliott Kalan

[4:05] Never happens.

[4:06] We're just not that good.

[4:07] We've only been doing this for 18, 19 years.

[4:11] Almost 19, yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[4:12] Our listeners are like hunting the dark web for this light power that we made.

[4:18] Yeah, we made it.

[4:19] Like, oh, ho-hum, another red room.

[4:21] Get out of here.

[4:22] I'm looking for the Flophouse jokes.

Elliott Kalan

[4:24] Yeah, I was looking for this thing Dan made,

[4:26] and I ended up on Dee Snider's Strangeland.

[4:28] So I got back at that.

[4:29] I appreciate you guys.

Stuart Wellington

[4:30] Nope.

[4:31] Fear.com.com.

[4:32] Okay.

[4:33] Let me just click through all the fucking ads.

Elliott Kalan

[4:35] The more I think about it, that is the funniest thing about Fear.com,

[4:38] is that the name of the website is Fear.com spelled out.

[4:42] Okay.

[4:42] That's so funny.

Dan McCoy

[4:43] Play in window.

[4:44] I finally figured out how to do this part of things, so that's good.

Elliott Kalan

[4:48] Wow.

[4:49] Dan has merged with the internet.

[4:50] He's like a regular virtuosity owner.

Dan McCoy

[4:52] And now I got to share it with you.

[4:55] Sharing is not turned on.

[4:57] I'm going to send a request to you, Elliot.

[4:59] Okay.

[4:59] I'm going to allow this request.

Elliott Kalan

[5:00] This is the kind of stuff we could have dealt with before the recording,

[5:02] but I'm glad we didn't.

Dan McCoy

[5:04] It adds a certain je ne sais quoi to the show.

[5:08] A certain Shaggy quality.

[5:09] Yeah.

[5:10] Did he approve the request?

[5:11] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[5:11] Shaggy's like...

[5:13] Okay.

[5:14] He's like, wasn't me.

[5:15] Yeah.

[5:15] I get it.

[5:15] Exactly.

[5:16] Yeah.

[5:16] Who let these dogs out?

[5:17] Joint keys.

[5:17] That's what the other Shaggy is like.

[5:19] Yeah.

[5:19] That's the Baja men, Dan.

[5:21] Oh, yeah.

[5:22] Come on.

[5:22] Sorry.

[5:23] Oh, you're right.

Elliott Kalan

[5:24] Maybe we're going to turn off the podcast.

[5:25] No, you're right.

[5:25] Dan.

[5:26] Dan.

[5:26] I thought you were in charge today.

[5:28] He says, shorty, you're my angel.

Dan McCoy

[5:30] He says it wasn't me.

[5:31] Yeah, he does say, shorty, you're my angel.

[5:32] My darling angel.

Elliott Kalan

[5:33] But his main thing is saying it wasn't me.

[5:35] That's his thing.

[5:35] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[5:36] Yeah.

[5:37] Closer than my peeps.

[5:39] You ready?

[5:40] Can I share it now?

[5:41] Yeah.

[5:42] Am I allowed to share?

[5:43] Yeah, I allowed it.

[5:44] For God's sake, let me share.

Elliott Kalan

[5:46] Let the man share already.

Dan McCoy

[5:48] Okay.

[5:49] There it is.

Elliott Kalan

[5:50] What if you said, let me share, and then I said yes, and you started singing,

[5:53] if I could turn back time.

[5:56] And I said, Dan, I'm not going to share.

Stuart Wellington

[5:58] You have the fucking Uatu's asking.

Elliott Kalan

[6:00] Let's get the watcher to see what alternate world that happens in.

[6:02] Elliot, are you seeing this?

[6:04] Because I know we're seeing it here.

[6:05] Okay.

[6:05] I am seeing it.

[6:06] It's a PowerPoint presentation on a subject that you've talked about before on this podcast.

[6:11] Well, I've talked about it on a live show.

[6:12] Someone say you have an unsafe, maybe an unholy obsession with it.

[6:16] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[6:16] Yeah.

[6:16] Somebody, he snaps a one-wish willow, and it's Jim and the Holograms all day long.

[6:20] Well, as you can see here, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[6:21] The title of it is Jim and the Holograms, a deep dive into one of Dan's odd obsessions.

[6:28] Well, aka Revenge for Elden Ring and Warhammer is a dish best served Jim.

Stuart Wellington

[6:33] Yeah, yeah.

[6:34] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[6:34] So, here we go.

[6:36] We're going to talk about-

Stuart Wellington

[6:37] Jim's on you.

[6:37] I'm excited.

Elliott Kalan

[6:40] Dan, let me, before we start, I just want to ask one question.

[6:42] If the U of, say, 20 years ago, 25 years ago, could see yourself now, do you think he

[6:48] would guess that you were strangely obsessed with Jim and the Holograms?

Dan McCoy

[6:53] Well, that's a good question, Elliot.

[6:55] I did watch it when I was a kid.

[6:57] I, you know, confirming my status as an odd lad, I preferred it to such things as G.I.

[7:05] Joe and the Transformers.

[7:09] I don't know if odd's the word.

Elliott Kalan

[7:10] You had your own things.

[7:12] You were less interested in violence, more interested in the high stakes world of popular music.

Dan McCoy

[7:16] The soap opera stylings in the record industry of Jim.

[7:22] Of course, unfortunately-

Stuart Wellington

[7:23] I was more into the record industry stylings of the band Jabberjaw, was it?

[7:28] It was called The Neptunes.

[7:30] Thank you.

[7:31] I believe-

[7:32] Oh, I get it, because they play music in their tunes.

Elliott Kalan

[7:35] Yeah, that's it.

[7:37] No part of it.

[7:38] Because they're all Nepo babies who play tunes.

[7:40] Oh, that makes a lot of sense.

[7:41] So, Dan, the only problem is that because you didn't watch G.I. Joe, you don't know that knowing is half the battle.

Dan McCoy

[7:46] Oh, I do.

[7:47] I am familiar with that part of it.

[7:49] Oh, okay, okay.

[7:49] I'm well familiar with that.

[7:51] And the funny thing about Jim is every once in a while, they would throw in one of those at the end of Jim as well.

[7:58] They would, like, have a little PSA announcement, but very rarely.

[8:02] It was like, Jim doesn't really care about these issues.

[8:06] Jim just needs to fill a little time.

Elliott Kalan

[8:08] The script came in like-

[8:10] Because the G.I. Joe guys were really passionate about these issues.

Stuart Wellington

[8:13] Yeah, yeah, they're like, I'm not going to fight Cobra unless I can do my little thing at the end about graffiti.

Elliott Kalan

[8:17] We have a pitch for a TV show where a bunch of American Special Forces borderline mercenaries tell kids about fire safety and not talking to strangers.

[8:26] We don't want to put that on TV unless they're shooting lasers at ninjas.

[8:30] Do you remember that one where like-

Stuart Wellington

[8:31] If we must.

[8:32] Where like Shipwreck was going through like a weird, like, psycho, psychedelic journey thing.

[8:39] Do you remember that episode?

[8:40] No, I don't remember that one.

[8:41] It was pretty cool.

Stuart Wellington

[8:41] I'm enjoying all this side talk.

Dan McCoy

[8:42] Pretty Dr. Mindbender was fun.

[8:44] But I got to tell you that I had a hard time cutting down this Jim minis.

[8:48] So we should probably dive into it.

[8:49] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[8:49] Yeah, then let's get started.

[8:50] Again, you're in charge.

[8:51] Here we go.

Dan McCoy

[8:52] So Jim and the Holograms, I mean, actually the actual title of the show is just Jim.

[8:58] But Jim and the Holograms is, of course, the band.

Elliott Kalan

[9:00] I mean, that's a revelation to me.

[9:02] I didn't realize that.

[9:03] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[9:04] Sorry.

[9:05] And Jim, I'm probably saying it too much of an I sound.

Elliott Kalan

[9:09] It does sound like you're saying Jim and the Holograms.

Dan McCoy

[9:12] Jim and the Holograms.

Stuart Wellington

[9:15] Named after the precious stone of the same name, right?

[9:19] Yeah.

[9:19] Holograms.

[9:20] Anyway.

Elliott Kalan

[9:22] So the star of the show.

[9:25] That pitch was right over the plate and Dan knocked it out of the park.

[9:27] Thank you.

[9:28] That's just solid fundamentals.

[9:30] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[9:30] The protagonist, of course, Jerrica Benton.

[9:34] Now Jerrica.

[9:35] Now I was going to say Jam and the Holograms, of course, a 1980s syndicated cartoon starring

[9:44] Jerrica Benton.

[9:46] As the series begins, Jerrica's father's just died.

[9:50] Oh, no.

[9:50] Leaving her half of Starlight Records and also Starlight House, which is where she grew up.

[9:58] It houses homeless orphaned girls from across the country.

Elliott Kalan

[10:02] So she grew up there even though her dad owned a record label.

Dan McCoy

[10:06] Well, I think it was just there.

[10:08] I mean, it was less an orphanage and more just they just kept adopting kids.

[10:14] Creepy.

Elliott Kalan

[10:14] All right.

[10:15] Yeah.

[10:15] I mean, it could be great.

[10:16] It could be out of the kindness of his heart.

[10:18] But, you know.

Dan McCoy

[10:18] You know what?

[10:20] For a while, I thought it was creepy.

[10:21] I just watched an episode, actually, where we get a lot of backstory.

[10:28] They find Jam's dad's diaries.

[10:32] And we learn a lot about the past.

[10:33] And part of it is that Jerrica's dead mother was an orphan herself who grew up in the system.

[10:41] And thus, she wants to adopt a lot of these kids.

Elliott Kalan

[10:44] The end of Hamilton is ripping off Jim and the holograms.

[10:48] Yes.

Dan McCoy

[10:49] 100%.

[10:49] Now, Jerrica, you might be surprised to learn.

[10:54] You might be shocked to find also the titular Jim.

[10:58] She's leading a Hannah Montana.

[10:59] Wait a minute.

[11:01] All questions will be answered, Stuart.

[11:03] She's leading a Hannah Montana-style double life as a mild-mannered record executive and a rock star.

[11:11] And only her bandmates know her true identity.

Elliott Kalan

[11:15] That feels like a conflict of interest.

[11:16] A huge company.

[11:17] It's not enough that she is already inheriting this record company just through her parentage.

[11:22] She also has to make herself the star act on the record label.

Stuart Wellington

[11:26] It was like when that producer of Jeopardy is like,

[11:29] Hey, guys, we finally found somebody to replace Alex Trebek.

[11:32] Me!

[11:33] That was bonkers.

Elliott Kalan

[11:35] The fact that he appeared in any episodes of that show were bonkers.

[11:38] That's bonkers.

[11:39] But on the other hand, sometimes it works.

[11:42] That's what happened with Andy Cohen and Bravo.

[11:43] He's like, I'm in charge of the network.

[11:45] Now I get my own talk show.

[11:46] And you know what?

[11:46] It works great.

[11:47] People love it.

Dan McCoy

[11:49] Wasn't that also true of, what's his face?

[11:52] George W. Bush's.

[11:54] George Jessel.

[11:55] You're thinking of George Jessel.

[11:56] BP.

[11:57] Whatever his face.

[11:58] Shooty.

[11:58] Shooty Gavin.

[12:00] The guy.

[12:00] Dick Cheney?

[12:01] Dick Cheney.

[12:01] That's true.

Elliott Kalan

[12:02] Dick Cheney was put on a, he was heading a committee to find a vice presidential candidate.

[12:05] And they chose himself.

Stuart Wellington

[12:06] Oh, yeah.

[12:08] I thought he was a record executive.

Elliott Kalan

[12:11] Yeah, Dick Cheney inherited half of Casablanca Records.

[12:14] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[12:15] Now we will learn that her being a rock star is an act of charity in and of itself.

[12:19] But that's coming up.

Elliott Kalan

[12:20] Because she's gifting the world with her beautiful music.

Dan McCoy

[12:23] Now, you might wonder why this double life, Hannah Montana, for instance, just wants to be a regular teen.

[12:31] Why does Jem need to do this?

[12:32] I don't know.

[12:35] Not really explained.

[12:37] But we do know why she started a band.

[12:40] And that is because that has to do with the villain of the show, Eric Raymond.

Elliott Kalan

[12:45] What an evil sounding name, Eric.

Dan McCoy

[12:50] Eric's dad left him 50% of Starlight Records as the show begins.

[12:54] And he's determined to run it only in evil ways.

[12:58] And he refuses to give.

Stuart Wellington

[12:59] He's got a little bit of Steve Guttenberg energy there.

Dan McCoy

[13:02] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[13:02] He is an evil Guttenberg.

[13:04] Now, what is an evil way of running a record company?

[13:06] I mean, other than the way record companies are usually run, which is fairly evil.

[13:10] Yeah.

[13:10] Well, Jim doesn't like the attitude.

[13:13] He wants to hire black musicians and then force them to put his name on as a co-songwriter.

[13:17] Yeah.

[13:18] I hate to break it to you, Jim and the Holograms.

[13:20] Eric didn't get there first.

Dan McCoy

[13:21] Yeah.

[13:22] Jim doesn't like the attitude of the Misfits, the band that Eric brings in.

Stuart Wellington

[13:27] And they're kind of a punk band in a way.

[13:31] I mean, they're definitely a punk band.

[13:32] You got Lil' Glenn Danzig singing his Elvis songs.

[13:34] Well, not that.

[13:35] Sure.

Elliott Kalan

[13:36] I mean, their style is –

[13:38] I mean, the Elvis songs are not the most punk thing that the Misfits continue.

[13:40] Yeah, yeah.

[13:41] And then you got –

[13:42] You got Jerry Only.

[13:43] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[13:43] Those guys who all became like weirdo MAGA guys later in life.

[13:48] And they're terrible.

Elliott Kalan

[13:48] They're all tri-state area guys.

[13:51] It was – that was not a surprise.

[13:52] The surprising thing about the Misfits is that those guys were interested in punk music and horror movies.

[13:57] Not that they were interested in bodybuilding, the Seattle Seahawks or the Jets, or MAGA stuff.

[14:03] Like, it's not really surprising.

Dan McCoy

[14:04] Now, the cartoon Misfits are sort of punk-coded, although their music does not sound that different from the holograms.

Elliott Kalan

[14:12] But did the band The Misfits ever try to sue the Gem Show?

Dan McCoy

[14:16] Good question.

[14:17] Don't know.

Elliott Kalan

[14:18] Don't know.

[14:18] Cool.

[14:19] But to complete your –

[14:20] Your obsession.

Dan McCoy

[14:22] Your other question.

[14:23] Your other question I will answer.

[14:25] The evilness of Eric, part of it is he refuses to give the money that she needs to keep up Starlight House, where all those poor orphan girls live.

[14:36] Oh, I see.

[14:37] He wants total control of the company, so he makes a bet on the upcoming Battle of the Bands.

[14:42] One of his bands versus one of Jerrica's.

[14:45] And the winner gets total control of the company and a mansion, which will, of course, later be handy when Starlight House is burned down by one of his goons.

[14:53] Oh, no.

[14:54] Wow.

[14:55] What is his band?

[14:57] Well, it's, of course, the villainous Misfits.

[14:59] Wait.

[15:00] Oh.

Stuart Wellington

[15:01] It looks so much cooler.

[15:02] Guys, you know, an animal print is in, especially when you have, like, a weird tasseled belt on top of it.

[15:09] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[15:11] Now, the Misfits got a great look.

[15:15] They've got a winning punk attitude, even though they do try and, as I will get into later, commit a lot of crimes.

[15:23] But, so, yeah, they're unrelated to the band, fronted by Glenn Danzig that you mentioned previously.

[15:29] Mm-hmm.

[15:30] But they do repeatedly try to murder Jim and the holograms over the course of the show.

[15:38] Frequently, you know, their schemes have plausible deniability that it could have been an accident, but they do stuff like throw them overboard on a cruise or –

[15:47] Oh, okay.

[15:48] I mean, that's –

[15:48] That's okay.

Elliott Kalan

[15:48] That's above and beyond being just a rival band.

[15:51] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[15:51] They smash a building they're in with a wrecking ball at one point.

[15:54] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[15:55] That seems, again, too much.

Dan McCoy

[15:57] Pretty dramatic.

Stuart Wellington

[15:59] I will introduce you to the Misfits.

[16:01] This isn't like – this isn't a Rube Goldberg thing.

[16:04] Like, they're just literally just A to B.

Elliott Kalan

[16:06] No, I don't think Rube Goldberg ever tried to kill anyone by smashing a wrecking ball into a building.

[16:10] Not that we know.

Stuart Wellington

[16:11] He smashed a wrecking ball into a building and that building fell over and then like 100 years later, something bad happened.

Elliott Kalan

[16:17] But it was all to tie his shoes.

[16:21] That's the thing.

[16:22] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[16:22] It was for a good cause.

[16:24] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[16:24] So, I have some information according to a news source called Reddit about the Misfits v. Misfits thing.

[16:32] Apparently, the creator of Gem and the Holograms didn't know about the band, the Misfits, until after the show had been running for a while.

[16:38] Oh, wow.

[16:38] And the members of the Misfits did not hear about the show until it was pretty much almost over.

[16:44] And at the time, apparently, according to this, the Misfits had broken up and nobody was using that name for their band.

[16:51] So, they didn't see any point in legal action.

[16:54] It's kind of a magical story in its way.

Dan McCoy

[16:56] Yeah.

[16:57] Yeah.

[16:57] Everyone ended up happy.

[16:59] No one had to get sued.

[17:02] But let me introduce you to the Misfits person by person.

[17:06] We've got Pizazz.

[17:08] Okay.

[17:08] She's the lead singer.

[17:09] She's brash and scheming.

[17:10] She comes from a wealthy family.

Elliott Kalan

[17:12] I think it's a sign of how much better the Misfits are that you did not introduce us to the individual holograms.

Dan McCoy

[17:16] Well, we're going to get to the holograms.

[17:18] Okay.

[17:18] So, I'm backing into it.

[17:20] We've got Roxy, the guitarist.

[17:21] Okay.

[17:22] She's cool.

[17:23] There's not a lot to her.

[17:24] I mean, that kind of hair is super in.

[17:25] No, no, no.

[17:26] She's got an attitude.

Elliott Kalan

[17:27] No.

[17:27] What I just want to say is with her combination of hair and face paint, she looks the most like the main character from Liquid Sky to me right now.

[17:34] That's true.

[17:35] Huge influence on Gem and the holograms.

Stuart Wellington

[17:37] And they all have like definitely like an Adam-ant energy.

Elliott Kalan

[17:41] Sure.

[17:41] Yeah.

[17:42] Yeah.

[17:42] Because they're tiny.

[17:45] Like an ant.

[17:45] And there's like a thousand of them.

[17:47] And they all live in a hill together.

[17:48] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[17:50] We've got Stormer.

[17:53] She plays Keyboard.

Elliott Kalan

[17:55] She's the Nazi of the group.

Dan McCoy

[17:56] Yeah.

[17:56] No, no.

[17:57] Quite the opposite.

[17:59] She is the closest thing the Misfits have to a nice one.

[18:01] To a Jew?

Elliott Kalan

[18:02] Oh.

[18:03] Because I would say the opposite of a Nazi.

[18:05] We know what that is.

[18:05] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[18:06] She is the nice Misfit.

[18:08] In one episode, she and Jerika's sister Kimber leave their respective bands and join together, put out an album together.

[18:16] And apparently in a later.

[18:18] Like a real Milo and Otis.

[18:19] In a later Jim comic series, Stormer and Kimber are a couple.

[18:23] Oh.

[18:23] There you go.

[18:24] Oh.

[18:25] Shippers.

Elliott Kalan

[18:26] Now, Dan, is this the way that they spell the word pizzazz or is this the way that you spelled it?

[18:30] This is the way the show sells pizzazz.

[18:31] Because it looks like pizza ass.

[18:32] It does look like pizza ass.

[18:35] That's exactly what I was getting at.

[18:37] Yeah.

[18:37] I mean, two great things.

Stuart Wellington

[18:38] Like the way one of the members of the New Jersey-based Misfits might describe somebody as being a nice pizza ass.

Elliott Kalan

[18:47] And lastly, in the Misfits.

[18:50] Now I just want to see The Sopranos, but it's cast with the Misfits.

Dan McCoy

[18:55] In the Misfits.

[18:57] Finally.

[18:57] Glenn.

Elliott Kalan

[18:57] Glenn.

[18:58] Can you believe this guy?

[18:59] Hey.

[19:00] What are you going to do about it, Glenn?

[19:01] They're moving on on territory.

Dan McCoy

[19:03] There's one more member.

[19:05] We've got Jedha.

[19:06] She joined in season two.

[19:08] She plays saxophone.

[19:09] She's the British one.

[19:11] She has a terrible British accent.

[19:13] At one point, she and her cockney parents try to grift pizzazz from her family money.

[19:18] Now, of course, they are the rivals to Jim's band, the Holograms.

Elliott Kalan

[19:25] Okay.

[19:25] Who do look almost exactly the same.

Dan McCoy

[19:28] Very similar.

[19:29] Big 80s hair.

[19:30] Everyone looks like their combination, like Nagel painting and like Trapper Keeper.

[19:37] Yeah.

[19:38] Very.

Elliott Kalan

[19:38] It's like if Lisa Frank had a band.

[19:41] Yeah.

[19:43] But if Lisa Frank's band was also Duran Duran.

[19:46] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[19:46] Oh, man.

[19:47] They are assembled from several Starlight Girls.

[19:51] We've got Kimber.

[19:54] That's Jim's sister.

[19:56] She's the keyboardist and songwriter.

Stuart Wellington

[19:59] Is she winking or did she lose an eye like Odin?

Elliott Kalan

[20:01] She's winking in this picture.

[20:02] She lost an eye when that wrecking ball hit the building.

[20:06] Did Kimber inherit any of the record company or just Jim?

Dan McCoy

[20:10] Just Jerica?

[20:13] Jerica, I think.

Elliott Kalan

[20:14] Because if I'd be Kimber, I'd be pretty pissed if I didn't get a piece of that.

Dan McCoy

[20:16] Yeah.

[20:17] So, you know, it is a definitely showing preference to the biological daughter over the adopted daughter.

[20:24] Yeah, I don't like that.

[20:25] I don't like that at all.

[20:27] But Kimber does not seem to bear ill will.

[20:30] She is very sweet, kind of naive, kind of prone to, you know, feeling overlooked like a younger daughter.

[20:39] Now, the other holograms aren't given a lot of personalities other than being multicultural.

[20:45] So, I'm going to point out that they are multicultural and that is most of their characteristics.

Stuart Wellington

[20:52] This isn't a fault of Dan.

[20:54] This is a fault of the show.

Dan McCoy

[20:56] Yeah, although, I mean, it is – I'm glad that the show at least made a token effort.

[21:01] Yes, of course.

[21:02] But it is very token.

[21:03] We've got –

Elliott Kalan

[21:04] It would be so funny if you were like, they're ethnically diverse.

[21:08] The show, it's – you know, the show is trying hard.

[21:11] Anyway, first there's Lepra O'Conn.

[21:13] She's the Irish one.

[21:15] Then, of course, you have Zulu Princess.

[21:17] We'd be like, Dan, these are terrible.

Dan McCoy

[21:19] Paddy O'Shaughnessy.

[21:20] Well, the first one comes close to that.

[21:23] We've got Aja, who is Asian, on guitar.

[21:26] Oh, hell yeah.

[21:27] I love that album.

[21:28] I love – yeah, Steely Dan's Aja.

[21:31] Steely B's, baby.

Elliott Kalan

[21:33] I think I'm almost at the age when I start listening to Steely Dan.

[21:36] I think I'm almost there.

Dan McCoy

[21:37] It happened to me, man.

[21:38] I was like, ooh, those smooth sounds are now very appealing to me.

Elliott Kalan

[21:43] I'm going through a big heart phase right now and I'm enjoying it a lot.

[21:46] So, I don't know if I'm ready for Steely Dan yet.

Stuart Wellington

[21:48] You might walk down a dangerous road called Pink Floyd territory.

[21:53] Oh, boy.

[21:54] Oh, wow.

[21:54] I've walked that road myself.

Elliott Kalan

[21:56] I feel like that's a door I have –

[21:57] It's almost like a yellow brick road.

[22:00] That's a door I have approached and then turned away from, but I know it's there.

[22:04] Hey, we wish you were here, you know?

Dan McCoy

[22:07] Have a cigar.

[22:11] So, I will say Aja –

[22:13] The wall.

[22:15] No.

Stuart Wellington

[22:16] Oh, man.

[22:17] Yeah, you're keeping it up in the air.

[22:19] We're actually stacking this thing.

[22:21] Yeah, let's volleyball this bit.

Dan McCoy

[22:25] I'm comfortably numb to Elliot's charms at this point.

[22:29] Wait, that's not – hold on a second.

[22:31] Now, Aja actually, I will say, has some technical abilities and I love the voice acting on Aja.

[22:39] She always sounds kind of sleepy, which of course appeals to me.

Elliott Kalan

[22:43] Would you consider that a stereotype that the Asian character has the technical abilities?

Dan McCoy

[22:46] A little bit, yeah.

[22:48] Okay.

[22:48] But we'll move on to Shana, who is black.

[22:53] She started on the drums but moved to bass after she briefly left the band to be replaced on the drums by Raya, the Latina member.

[23:02] Mmm.

[23:04] And there's also a band called The Stingers who are introduced in season three.

[23:10] They antagonize both the holograms of the misfits.

[23:12] I like that guy's energy right now.

Elliott Kalan

[23:14] I mean, it looks a little bit like Sebastian Bach and like two of the Simply Resistible dancers but with different hair.

[23:21] No, they look like –

[23:21] No, they look like the women from the Monee Monee video, the Billy Idol Monee video.

Dan McCoy

[23:26] They look like a thruple who are trying to come on to you.

[23:30] Certainly in that pose, yeah.

[23:31] Yeah.

[23:31] I mean, interesting stuff but this is getting long.

Elliott Kalan

[23:35] I'm amazed to see the guys holding a martini glass.

[23:38] Like that's not the kind of stuff you can usually do in kids' cartoons, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[23:41] Like in the 80s, man.

[23:43] It's all latchkey kids watching cartoons where people shoot each other or bands try and kill each other, you know.

[23:51] Yeah.

[23:52] So I'm going to put the stingers behind us.

[23:56] I don't really –

[23:57] That's where they go.

[23:58] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[23:59] And –

[23:59] Nobody has – no bees have stingers on their face.

[24:02] Come on.

Dan McCoy

[24:02] I'm going to get into a few – there's some NBCs or non-band characters.

[24:05] But I guess mosquitoes kind of do.

[24:07] Mm-hmm.

[24:08] We're going to highlight a few of these.

Elliott Kalan

[24:09] Yeah, what I like is – just to highlight for the listener, Dan called them NBCs, non-band characters, and he has the NBC peacock on the slide.

[24:17] That's just a little visual gag for the three of us, yeah.

[24:19] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[24:20] I try to make it special for you guys, you know.

[24:22] Yeah, you do.

[24:23] You do make it special.

[24:24] We got Rio.

[24:25] That's Jerika's boyfriend.

[24:27] Dance on the sand, yeah.

[24:28] Yep.

[24:29] He's also attracted to Jim and flirts with her.

[24:32] But Jerika won't tell him that Jim is her alter ego because as established, she's a messy bitch who likes drama.

[24:39] We've got Vivian Montgomery, better known as Video.

[24:43] Cool.

[24:44] Cool.

[24:44] Who does the holograms music videos.

[24:48] One starlight girl that always sticks out to me is Ashley Larson.

[24:54] And she mostly – she's like featured in a lot of episodes.

[24:58] She mostly sticks out to me because she reminds me of Tina Yothers from Family Ties.

[25:02] Okay.

[25:03] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[25:04] She's got a – whichever of the new mutants is a girl, Rusty or Skids, she reminds me of.

[25:10] Yes.

Stuart Wellington

[25:11] It's definitely – wait, I could be wrong.

[25:13] Yeah.

[25:14] I cannot.

Elliott Kalan

[25:14] Two characters who need better names.

[25:17] Yeah.

[25:17] Marvel, get on that.

Dan McCoy

[25:18] Here's one that I think you guys are going to like.

[25:21] Tech Rat.

[25:22] Yeah.

[25:23] Eric's evil tech advisor who sounds exactly like Starscream from Transformers because he was voiced by Charlie Abler who played Starscream.

[25:32] Oh, what a great voice.

Elliott Kalan

[25:33] And his haircut has gone all the way around and is evil again.

[25:38] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[25:38] Yeah, yeah.

[25:39] No, it's true.

[25:40] He definitely has the modern young Nazi intel.

Elliott Kalan

[25:46] It's very alt-right, kind of longish on top and close cut on the sides.

Stuart Wellington

[25:50] For Warhammer 40,000 enthusiasts, that would be the haircut of a Raven Guard Space Marine.

[25:57] Ooh.

[25:58] And, of course, the most important –

Elliott Kalan

[26:01] Stuart, someday I hope you have the confidence to change your name legally to Raven Guard Space Marine.

[26:08] I want to see that driver's license.

Stuart Wellington

[26:11] I'm clearly a son of Korax, the Primark of the Raven Guard.

Dan McCoy

[26:18] Now, we got to get to the most important non-band character of all, of course, Synergy.

[26:25] Oh, man.

[26:27] Archie jumped on –

Stuart Wellington

[26:28] That's just Archie.

[26:28] Archie hit the keyboard and fucked it up.

[26:31] Oh, wow.

[26:31] Right, right.

[26:32] Did the big reveal.

[26:33] Oh, man.

[26:33] Right, the big reveal.

Elliott Kalan

[26:34] Archie was so, so shocked that he jumped right on there.

[26:39] Okay.

[26:39] Good cat.

Dan McCoy

[26:40] Good cat.

[26:41] That's good podcasting.

[26:42] Bad cat, Dan.

Elliott Kalan

[26:42] Objectively a bad cat.

Dan McCoy

[26:44] No, it's good podcasting, though.

[26:45] Yeah.

[26:46] Oh, that's right.

[26:46] Yeah.

[26:47] Audience is going to be into it.

[26:48] We've got Synergy.

[26:49] What's that?

[26:50] That is – Synergy is the holographic computer that Jerica's father invented before he died.

[26:57] Oh, man.

[26:57] Because on top of being a half owner – well, an owner, full owner of a record company, he was a tech super genius.

[27:04] Of course, yeah.

[27:05] Oh, like Peter Parker.

[27:07] Yeah, and a serial orphan adopter.

Elliott Kalan

[27:09] In that Peter Parker also had a record company.

[27:12] Yay.

Dan McCoy

[27:15] And I've kind of glossed over it until now.

[27:17] But in addition to being a music industry soap opera, of course, Jim is a science fiction adventure show.

[27:25] And the key to it is that Synergy here gives Jerica the power to become Jim through Jim's starburst earrings, which she activates by touching and saying,

[27:37] Showtime Synergy.

[27:40] And in addition to using Synergy for her music career, Jerica often uses her holograms to distract and save her from the misfits or other threats.

[27:51] Now, yes, Elliot?

[27:53] You have a question?

Elliott Kalan

[27:54] I just want to say visually – no, visually Synergy has given me big kind of aerobics meets Xanadu energy.

[27:59] Yeah.

[28:00] And I love it.

[28:00] I love it.

[28:01] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[28:01] This is exactly what I was going to say.

[28:02] Yes, yes.

[28:04] Synergy looks like a sci-fi aerobics instructor.

[28:08] Yes.

[28:08] Mostly she lives inside the computer, but she can project herself fully out.

[28:13] And it's a great design.

[28:15] And also Synergy is in large part based on Jerica's deceased mother who died in a plane crash when Jerica was young.

[28:27] Wow.

[28:27] Perpetrated by the misfits, I'd imagine.

Elliott Kalan

[28:29] Probably.

[28:30] The computer designs – the characters, the character designs.

[28:32] I'm sorry, not the computer designs.

[28:33] Oh, this computer looks cool.

[28:34] It's kind of like a Wurlitzer, Oregon, HR Geiger-esque kind of electronic device.

[28:41] I will say the character designs and the fashions.

Stuart Wellington

[28:43] It looks like the pinball machine Centaur where you have a man-motorcycle hybrid that's being ridden by a lady.

Elliott Kalan

[28:51] I would say the designs, top-notch.

[28:54] I think they do a great job doing designs.

[28:55] And if you were to do a show about kind of – about 80 stereotypes and you tried to outdo these designs, I do not think you could do that.

[29:04] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[29:04] No, I'm going to say like, Elliot, you put your finger on something.

[29:09] You know, I'm one of the hosts of the Flophouse.

[29:11] And so –

[29:12] Oh, sure.

[29:12] Yeah, yeah.

[29:12] Welcome.

[29:14] Sometimes my enjoyment of something is – it's hard to distinguish what percentage of it is ironic or not.

[29:23] Hard to say even for myself.

[29:26] Like, my enjoyment of this show, like some of it is like – it is silly.

[29:32] Wacky stuff happens.

[29:34] There are nutty line readings from these over-the-top 80s cartoon voice actors.

[29:40] But there's stuff in it that I genuinely know that I actually love and part of it is the way that the show looks.

[29:48] It is –

Stuart Wellington

[29:48] Yeah, I think it reminds me a lot, both the way you appreciate it and some of the style elements of another deep lore dive that I made you guys go through that Dan has not mentioned yet.

[30:01] And that, of course, is JoJo's Bizarre Adventure.

[30:03] Yeah.

[30:04] Which is like if – like Nagel designed WWF wrestlers.

Dan McCoy

[30:10] Well, yeah.

[30:10] This is – I mean, of course this is done by animation studios in Asia that are drawing on – in addition to like, you know, sort of American like 80s styles.

Elliott Kalan

[30:24] Well, but they wouldn't – I don't think they would have been doing these designs, right?

[30:27] What was the impression coming by?

Dan McCoy

[30:28] No, they might not have been doing the designs.

[30:31] But this – the show definitely draws on certain anime stylings before like sort of pure anime came to these shores.

[30:43] But anyway, before we get on to the second part of the mini, before we take a little break and then do part two, I just need to address, of course, the – one of the most important elements of the show and that is the songs.

[30:55] Every episode of Jem has at least two original songs in it lasting from about 30 seconds to a minute accompanied by a music video that has clearly been animated by a better studio with a slightly bigger budget than the rest of the episode.

[31:14] And I will say that despite the Misfits interrupting the theme song to insist that their songs are better, their songs are about the same in quality and sound.

[31:24] The biggest difference is that Jem's songs tend to be about uplifting topics and Misfits songs tend to be about being mean.

[31:33] And to show this, we've got some hologram song titles including Believe in Yourself, Getting Down to Business.

[31:42] Aztec Enchantment.

[31:43] I was also joined to Aztec Enchantment, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[31:46] I'm Taking a Train.

[31:47] We're Making It Happen.

[31:49] Yeah, Come On In.

[31:49] The Water's Fine.

[31:50] Open a book.

[31:51] And also Come On In.

[31:52] There's two different songs, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[31:53] Yeah.

[31:53] Can't Get My Love Together sounds like a fucking ZZ Top song.

[31:56] Everybody Wears a Mask is one of the wistful haunting songs.

Elliott Kalan

[32:00] That's basically a Billy Joel song.

[32:02] I mean, that's The Stranger, yeah.

[32:03] Mm-hmm.

[32:04] Getting Down to Business, Glitter and Gold, yeah.

[32:06] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[32:07] Getting Down to Business also is easy to have someone.

[32:09] But Misfits song titles are more along the lines of Making Misfits, Making Mischief, Bad Influence, Out of My Way, Gimme, Gimme, Gimme, We're Up, You're Down, and I'm Gonna Hunt You Down.

Stuart Wellington

[32:26] And Not Does It Feel, also a ZZ Top song.

Dan McCoy

[32:30] And Designing Women.

[32:32] Oh, wow.

[32:33] Yeah, they didn't do their research when they were looking up the titles for some of these things.

Elliott Kalan

[32:38] I mean, didn't do their research.

[32:39] I think they probably just heard other songs and were like, yeah, we could use that.

Dan McCoy

[32:43] One last song-related thing before we go into…

[32:46] Share a little bit of yourself.

[32:48] Going to the break.

Elliott Kalan

[32:50] I love the idea of a song called Out of My Way.

[32:53] There's already a song called My Way.

[32:55] I want one called Out of My Way.

[32:58] Of course, the theme song…

Stuart Wellington

[33:00] It's like the response to the…

Dan McCoy

[33:01] Like a response diss track.

[33:04] The theme song to Jim, the famous one we all remember.

Elliott Kalan

[33:08] Jim, I'm gonna live forever.

[33:10] Close.

[33:11] I'll be a hologram.

[33:13] Jim.

[33:14] That one.

Dan McCoy

[33:14] Jim is truly outrageous.

[33:17] Truly, truly, truly outrageous.

[33:19] Now, that song, that theme, of course, is a banger.

[33:21] However…

Elliott Kalan

[33:22] Jim and the holograms, no one should terrorize the neighborhood.

[33:26] That's what I'm gonna miss.

Dan McCoy

[33:27] The problem is, for half of the episodes starting in season two, the theme that we all recall

[33:32] is actually switched for a different one.

[33:35] All of us.

[33:36] Well, you remember that Jim is truly outrageous.

[33:39] Truly, truly, truly outrageous.

[33:39] I mean, kind of.

Elliott Kalan

[33:40] I kind of remember it more as a reference than anything else, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[33:43] That song is, I would say, a genuinely great theme song.

[33:47] It is switched for a different one in season two for about half the episodes.

[33:52] I hear the Jim is calling, toss silent and holograms.

[33:57] This one, the refrain of this other song is…

Elliott Kalan

[34:01] Jim me that smile again.

Dan McCoy

[34:03] Jim me that smile.

[34:04] Is, me and my friends are Jim girls.

[34:08] Jim.

[34:09] Jim is my name.

[34:11] Exciting adventure, fashion, and fame.

[34:13] Once you're a Jim girl, you're never the same.

[34:15] Come on, come on.

[34:17] And be a Jim girl.

[34:18] Jim.

[34:19] Jim is my name.

[34:20] And now, this song is way worse, but it is in our household, our theory is,

[34:26] this was done to make Jim sort of more aspirational for young girls,

[34:32] so they could sell more toys to make them, quote, jam girls.

[34:36] But we don't have any evidence to back this up.

[34:38] This is just our theory.

Elliott Kalan

[34:39] I mean, it sounds like you're going to have to go all the way to the president

[34:41] on this one to find out what happened.

Dan McCoy

[34:44] Well, speaking of the president…

Stuart Wellington

[34:46] Maybe wait, wait, president.

[34:47] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[34:49] Speaking of the office of the president, we may be hearing a little bit about that

[34:53] in the second half of this episode.

[34:56] Second half?

[34:57] Yeah.

[34:59] I kept saying we're about to get to the break, Elliot.

[35:03] And speaking of the break.

[35:04] I thought it was one of those breaks where it's like,

Elliott Kalan

[35:06] like sometimes they do on like Everybody Loves Raymond,

[35:08] where you'd come back for like a minute of television afterwards, you know.

S4

[35:15] All right, we're over 70 episodes into our show.

[35:18] Let's learn everything.

[35:19] So let's do a quick progress tech.

[35:21] Have we learned about quantum physics?

[35:23] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[35:24] Episode 59.

S4

[35:25] We haven't learned about the history of gossip yet, have we?

[35:28] Yes, we have.

[35:28] Same episode, actually.

[35:30] Have we talked to Tom Scott about his love of roller coasters?

[35:33] Episode 64.

Elliott Kalan

[35:34] So how close are we to learning everything?

S4

[35:36] Bad news.

[35:37] We still haven't learned everything yet.

Elliott Kalan

[35:40] We're ruined!

S4

[35:42] No, no, no.

[35:43] It's good news as well.

[35:44] There is still a lot to learn.

[35:46] Woo!

[35:47] I'm Dr. Ella Hubber.

Elliott Kalan

[35:48] I'm regular Tom Lum.

S4

[35:50] I'm Caroline Roper.

[35:51] And on Let's Learn Everything, we learn about science and a bit of everything else too.

[35:54] And although we haven't learned everything yet,

[35:56] I've got a pretty good feeling about this next episode.

[35:59] Join us every other Thursday on Maximum Fun.

Elliott Kalan

[36:02] If you want to know what's going on in the world of movies,

[36:05] you should be listening to Maximum Film so we can tell you all about it.

Dan McCoy

[36:08] Okay, but what if you already know what's going on in the world of movies?

[36:11] What if you're kind of obsessed with movies?

[36:12] Like maybe you have a problem?

[36:14] Well, then you should definitely be listening to Maximum Film

[36:17] because we too have that problem and it's important you know you're not alone.

S4

[36:22] We're talking indies you'll want to seek out.

Stuart Wellington

[36:24] Blockbusters and blockbusting wannabes.

[36:26] Classics we can't get enough of.

[36:28] I'm comedian and writer Kevin Avery.

[36:30] I'm film critic Alonzo Duraldi.

[36:32] I'm festival programmer and producer Drea Clark.

[36:34] Together, we're Maximum Film.

[36:36] Smart about movies and Hollywood, so you don't have to be.

Dan McCoy

[36:39] But if you already are, that's also great.

[36:42] And hey, we see you.

Elliott Kalan

[36:43] New episodes every week on MaximumFun.org.

Dan McCoy

[36:46] We're sponsored in part this podcast, The Flophouse by Factor.

[36:52] Factor.

[36:54] Sometimes, you know, you're tired.

[36:57] You don't know what to eat.

[36:59] You just grab the nearest thing to you.

[37:02] No matter how bad it is for you.

[37:04] Maybe it's one of your own children.

Elliott Kalan

[37:06] You shouldn't eat that.

[37:07] No, don't eat that.

[37:09] What are you?

[37:10] What are you?

[37:10] The God of Saturn?

[37:12] What are you doing?

Dan McCoy

[37:13] That's a bad choice.

[37:15] Sometimes eating well, though, isn't about willpower or making choices.

[37:20] It's a setup problem.

[37:22] You got to set yourself up for success.

[37:24] And that's where Factor comes in.

[37:26] It can help you hit your goals without planning grocery runs or cooking.

[37:32] It just gives you good food right there.

[37:35] Factor has meals built around your nutrition goals, including high fiber, high protein, and carb-conscious options.

[37:43] And if you need some strength and workout recovery, Stuart, check out Factor's Muscle Pro collection.

[37:50] Give me that muscle.

[37:52] Mm-hmm.

[37:53] You pro.

[37:54] Factor is fresh, never frozen.

[37:56] Over 100 rotating weekly meals, including globally inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian.

[38:03] So there's always something new to look forward to.

[38:05] And it's delivered straight to your door.

[38:07] And it is ready to eat in two minutes.

[38:10] So you don't have to worry about cooking.

[38:12] You got more time to do the other stuff that you want to do.

[38:16] I have enjoyed these Factor meals.

[38:19] I've said it before.

[38:21] Unlike Elliot, I like cooking.

[38:24] I even like the prep part that he hates.

[38:27] I like chopping up stuff.

[38:28] Don't like it.

[38:29] I like measuring stuff.

[38:30] Hate that.

[38:31] But sometimes I get tired.

[38:34] It's nice to be able to reach for something that you know is going to be relatively good for you and fast.

[38:41] And it will taste good without a lot of work that you got to put into it or a lot of mental energy.

[38:48] So head to factormeals.com slash flop50off and use code flop50off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies laughed and laughed.

[39:02] While supplies laughed.

[39:06] While supplies laughed.

[39:08] While supplies laugh and laugh and laugh at you.

[39:15] While supplies last, of course.

[39:18] That's what supplies do.

[39:19] Live last, love.

[39:24] Hey, you can get those free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27, 2026.

[39:33] See website for more details.

[39:35] Also, the Flophouse is sponsored in part by ZocDoc.

[39:43] ZocDoc.

[39:44] What is it?

[39:46] Well.

[39:47] Webster's Dictionary defines...

[39:50] No, no, no.

[39:50] ZocDoc is a service that helps you connect with a doctor.

[39:57] This episode is supported by them.

[39:58] In fact, it's designed to make it easier to find a new doctor when things in your life change.

[40:04] It helps you search and compare local in-network doctors.

[40:08] And their free-to-use website has tons of reviews from real patients.

[40:13] So, you can check out these doctors, what other people thought of them.

[40:17] Dedicated doctor profiles to help you choose the right one for you.

[40:21] And you can see actual appointment openings and click to instantly book a visit, usually with 24 to 72 hours.

[40:29] When I have, in the past, needed an entirely new type of doctor where I'm like, I don't know.

[40:36] I think this thing might be wrong with me.

[40:37] I don't know where to go.

[40:39] I don't have a contact for this.

[40:41] I have found ZocDoc to be very useful in that situation.

[40:46] Your health matters and taking care of yourself shouldn't be complicated.

[40:50] So, find and book the right doctor with ZocDoc.

[40:52] Head to ZocDoc.com slash flop to get started and check that appointment off your to-do list.

[40:59] That is Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash flop.

Stuart Wellington

[41:08] We've also got a Jumbotron.

[41:13] And this week's message is from Behind the Camera Travel Agency.

[41:18] Travel planning has become so overwhelming that planning a fun trip can feel like another chore.

[41:26] Specializing in both family vacations and company meetings,

[41:29] Behind the Camera Travel is a modern travel agency that will help you plan your perfect vacation

[41:36] or your corporate conference at no cost to you.

[41:41] We plan so you can enjoy your picture-perfect memories.

[41:47] So, book your travel now at BehindTheCameraTravel.com.

Elliott Kalan

[41:54] The Flophouse will be performing live.

[41:57] Yes, you heard me live.

[41:59] What?

[41:59] In person.

[42:00] In person for you.

[42:03] One stipulation.

[42:04] If you're in Louisville, Kentucky on September 18th of this year at 8 p.m.

[42:08] Luckily, I will be there.

[42:10] You will be there, Dan.

[42:11] You'll be one of the performers.

[42:14] I sure hope you're going to be there.

[42:15] Otherwise, I'm going to have to use Stand In, Dan, which is just my hand with a beard drawn on it.

Dan McCoy

[42:20] Man decoy right there.

[42:22] Oh, man.

[42:22] I would give money.

[42:24] Like, can I, like, go there?

[42:26] And then I was going to say wear a fake mustache, but I have one as part of that beard that you were mentioning.

[42:31] So, I guess I would have to shave it off and sit in the audience in disguise to watch you do me.

[42:36] No, no, no, no, no.

[42:37] You should put an additional mustache on top of your current mustache.

[42:41] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[42:42] Yeah.

[42:42] So, that's exactly what you should do.

[42:44] But don't do that.

[42:45] Don't tell us about it.

[42:47] Instead, save it as a prank.

[42:48] Okay.

[42:49] Listeners, maybe it'll happen.

[42:50] We are going to be at the Whirling Tiger in Louisville, Kentucky on Friday, September 18th at, let's see, what time does the show start?

[42:58] The show starts at 8 p.m., doors at 7 p.m.

[43:01] If you're interested, and I think you should be, go to flophousepodcast.com slash events, and you will find the link to tickets.

[43:08] Again, that is Friday, September 18th in Louisville, Kentucky.

[43:12] And it's interesting that we're talking about music and singers and the music business in this episode.

Stuart Wellington

[43:16] Because Howell Dottie is going to be our special guest.

Elliott Kalan

[43:18] Yeah, because Howell Dottie, a.k.a. Alex Smith, will be our special guest.

[43:21] And we're going to be talking about the movie Glitter, starring Mariah Carey.

[43:25] So, come see us with special guest Howell Dottie, Friday, September 18th at the Whirling Tiger in Louisville, Kentucky.

Stuart Wellington

[43:32] Does he use a computer to morph?

[43:34] Do you think Alex has a computer?

[43:35] No, does Alex use a computer to morph from Alex to Howell Dottie?

[43:39] Oh, probably.

[43:40] There's no way to find out.

Dan McCoy

[43:41] A computer to morph.

[43:43] Yeah, if he does any morph.

Elliott Kalan

[43:44] I mean, he uses a computer for most of his work, is my guess.

[43:47] Everybody's morphing these days.

[43:48] So, go to flophousepodcast.com slash events for tickets to see us live in Louisville, Kentucky.

[43:53] We haven't done a live show in a while.

[43:55] I'm really excited about it.

[43:56] We're hoping to do more in the future.

[43:58] But for now, this is your only chance that we've got on the books.

[44:01] So, again, that's September 18th in Louisville.

[44:04] Other than that, I've got my regular old stuff to plug.

[44:07] Joke Farming is on store shelves and also available as an audiobook.

[44:10] That's my book about joke writing.

[44:12] Barbarian Behind Bars has just finished its run as a comic book, and it's going to be a collected edition at some point.

[44:18] And Harley Quinn continues to come out monthly, written by me from DC Comics.

[44:23] That's all my stuff.

Stuart Wellington

[44:23] How long have you been on Harley Quinn now?

[44:25] For a while.

[44:25] It'll be about two years pretty soon.

[44:28] Wow.

[44:29] That's quite a run.

Elliott Kalan

[44:30] This is my longest run on a book.

[44:31] We've got a real Chris Claremont over here.

[44:33] To be honest, I'm like, two years.

[44:35] Wow.

[44:35] That's amazing.

[44:36] And then look at him, I'm like, he's like, he wrote X-Men for 17 years?

[44:39] Wow.

[44:41] No wonder every other story was just about mind control and bondage domination.

[44:46] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[44:47] Hey, write what you know.

[44:49] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[44:51] So, returning to Jim.

Elliott Kalan

[44:55] Now, uh...

[44:55] Wait, before we turn to Jim, do you think if the Crypt Keeper had a comic book video podcast,

[44:59] he'd call him Chris Claremont?

Stuart Wellington

[45:01] Yes, of course he would.

[45:02] Okay.

[45:02] Dan, continue.

[45:03] Then he would probably do maybe like a little laugh after he did it.

[45:07] Just a little chuckle.

[45:09] Just like a tiny one.

Dan McCoy

[45:10] Nothing too outrageous.

[45:12] Yeah.

[45:12] No, no, no.

[45:13] He's a restrained gentleman.

[45:16] Yeah.

[45:18] So, and I'm going to be honest here, guys.

[45:21] I, uh, this...

[45:22] The back half is the fat half of the mini.

[45:25] This mini was way longer.

[45:28] And I was like, what am I doing?

Elliott Kalan

[45:31] Yeah, I mean, it is Jim and the holograms.

Dan McCoy

[45:33] I can't put all of this in here.

[45:34] So, I cut one of these.

[45:36] So, you're welcome.

[45:36] Anyway, the point is...

[45:37] Oh, thanks.

[45:38] To save for another mini in the future.

[45:40] I'm going to summarize the first couple of acts of a pair of episodes of Jim.

[45:46] Okay.

[45:47] And then at the second commercial break, where the cliffhanger is,

[45:52] I'm going to pause my summary.

[45:54] I'd like you both to postulate how this episode might end,

[45:59] how it might resolve,

[46:00] before I give you the actual ending to the episode.

[46:05] And so, the first of the two episodes I'm going to give you a synopsis of.

[46:12] This is from season two.

[46:14] This is episode 23.

[46:16] It is titled Journey Through Time.

[46:19] Hmm.

[46:20] Now, in this episode, Jim and the holograms are set to headline the World History of Music concert.

[46:28] Wow.

[46:29] And the misfits are mad because they want the gig.

[46:32] Now, Eric says that Tech Rat is working on something that just might make that possible.

[46:39] Jim rehearses the first of our songs for the episode.

[46:43] Rock and roll is forever.

[46:45] And the music video...

Elliott Kalan

[46:46] But it's caveman themed, right?

[46:47] Because it's the history of music from the beginning.

Dan McCoy

[46:50] Yeah.

[46:50] Um, don't skip ahead, Elliot.

[46:52] Rock and roll is forever.

[46:54] And the music video for that is them getting zapped into stereotypical outfits from various cultures across the world.

[47:00] Ah, I see.

[47:01] At Misfits HQ, Tech Rat has, of course, invented a time machine.

[47:06] Of course.

Elliott Kalan

[47:08] It's so funny that this is what...

[47:10] This kind of thing happens all the time in cartoons.

[47:11] It's like, we invented a time machine.

[47:13] Let's use it to become the headliners at a concert.

[47:16] It's like, even if you weren't going to use it for good things,

[47:18] there's so many more profitable bad things you can use this for.

[47:22] They don't have the scheming intelligence of a BIF from Back to the Future.

[47:27] Right, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[47:28] Well, that's always the question about Synergy, too.

[47:30] It's like, oh, okay, Starlight House, you could fund it with patenting Synergy.

[47:35] I mean, in this flashback episode, the dad's like,

[47:38] this technology is too dangerous.

[47:40] It has to remain a secret.

[47:41] He was right.

[47:42] He was right about AI.

[47:43] Yeah.

[47:44] Should have remained a not thing.

[47:46] Yeah.

[47:47] But Tech Rat sends Jim and the holograms back in time.

[47:52] And they're conveniently standing right next to Synergy at this point.

[47:58] So Jim still has her hologram powers in the past.

[48:02] Oh, thank Christ.

[48:04] Who they meet.

[48:05] Now, in the present, Constanza Mozart.

Elliott Kalan

[48:08] He's so funny.

[48:09] They go back in time and they're at the crucifixion.

Stuart Wellington

[48:12] And he's like, help me.

[48:13] And they're like, nah.

Dan McCoy

[48:14] We can't.

[48:15] We can't change the past.

[48:16] We'll sing the song, Rockin' Into Heaven.

[48:20] They know not what they do.

[48:25] No.

[48:26] In the present, Constanza Mozart appears by the misfits in Tech Rat.

[48:31] Uh-huh.

[48:32] Because he explains that his time machine has one flaw.

[48:35] It requires an exchange in body mass.

[48:37] So sending Jim and the holograms back in time means they need to receive someone from the past.

[48:42] Now, I don't know why the exchange is like five people or whatever it is.

[48:47] Or one people.

[48:48] Yeah, that's not a mass.

[48:49] Is he a giant?

[48:50] Yeah.

[48:51] But in the past, Synergy confirms they've been sent to Vienna, 1781.

[48:56] Uh-huh.

[48:57] She gives them appropriate holographic clothes to disguise themselves.

[49:01] They meet Wolfgang Mozart.

[49:03] Do they meet a Salieri?

[49:06] Don't get ahead of it.

[49:09] Because this Wolfgang Mozart in this episode is a wholesale riff-off of the Tom Hulse Amadeus Mozart.

[49:16] Of course.

Elliott Kalan

[49:16] You think they're going to invent a new personification for Mozart for an episode of Jim and the holograms?

[49:20] It's amazing.

Dan McCoy

[49:21] Like he is doing the high-pitched like laugh all the time.

[49:25] Oh, yeah.

[49:26] It is crazy how much this is like kids love Amadeus.

[49:30] I mean, I did actually.

[49:31] Kids do love Amadeus.

[49:34] Anyway, all the holograms are horny for Mozart.

[49:38] Sure, of course.

[49:38] But he is depressed because of his rival, Solieri.

[49:43] That's how they pronounce it here.

[49:45] Solieri.

[49:46] Because he's like a funk musician?

[49:48] He'd be so pissed.

[49:49] He would be.

[49:50] He'd be so fucking mad.

[49:52] So now Solieri is trying to keep Mozart from playing for the emperor that night.

Elliott Kalan

[49:58] I love the idea that they're like, this Mozart is too close to Tom Hulse's performance.

[50:02] We've got to make it seem like we've never seen Amadeus.

[50:06] Let's call this character Solieri.

[50:07] He's a totally different character.

Dan McCoy

[50:09] TM, TM.

[50:11] They're trying to keep Mozart.

[50:14] He's trying to keep Mozart from playing for the emperor that night with armed guards.

[50:18] The band distracts those guards by allowing themselves to get kidnapped with a holographic decoy Mozart.

[50:25] While the real one goes to entertain the emperor.

[50:28] Meanwhile, the band escapes and they go to the concert themselves.

[50:32] But a lightning storm creates interference for synergy.

[50:36] Okay.

[50:36] Causing the holograms' period costumes to flicker.

[50:39] And they're chased from the theater as witches.

[50:43] That makes sense, actually.

[50:45] Now, of course, back in the present.

Elliott Kalan

[50:47] Wait, I was going to say, witches is just such a classic go-to thing for the past.

[50:52] There's a Superman comic where he and Batman go back in time to the revolutionary era and meet Ben Franklin.

[50:58] And they're about to be burned as witches.

[51:00] And it's like, what are you doing?

[51:01] Nobody was burning witches in the 1770s.

[51:04] Like, what are you doing?

Stuart Wellington

[51:04] Come on.

[51:05] And I feel like Superman would be fine, right?

Elliott Kalan

[51:08] He would be fine.

[51:09] Actually, he was probably laughing and laughing as Batman tried to blow out the flames.

[51:14] There's a part in it where they say, oh, no.

[51:16] They go, why are you dressed like that?

[51:17] And he goes, we're traveling players.

[51:18] I have an S on my chest for Shakespeare.

Stuart Wellington

[51:23] Oh, man.

[51:24] Comics are pretty awesome.

[51:25] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[51:26] Yeah.

[51:27] This episode, by the way, highlights one of the things I really enjoy about the show,

[51:30] which is it presents like it is going to be a show about a...

[51:35] A concert.

[51:36] A girl rock band and a soap opera about the entertainment industry.

[51:42] And then there's time machines and such.

Elliott Kalan

[51:46] I mean, because it's educational.

[51:47] It's just like the original Doctor Who.

[51:48] It's meant to be educational.

[51:49] Exactly.

[51:49] So you learn about Mozart and Solieri.

Dan McCoy

[51:52] In the present, Eric and the misfits are getting annoyed by Constanza

[51:56] and they insist that Tech Rat send her back,

[51:59] which unwittingly, that rescues the GM crew by sending them to London during the Blitz.

[52:06] Oh, that's not a place you want to be.

[52:08] Yeah.

[52:09] A ballroom Blitz, I hope.

[52:11] Well, speaking of ballrooms, they see a poster for the Ben Tiller Orchestra

[52:16] because I guess Glenn Miller's name wasn't in the public domain like Mozart's.

[52:22] No.

Elliott Kalan

[52:22] And neither was Ben Stiller's, yeah.

[52:25] But they befriend the horns.

[52:28] I mean, Glenn Miller probably was not in the public domain by that point.

Dan McCoy

[52:31] Well, there's an interesting twist on that later on.

Elliott Kalan

[52:34] Oh, in that he meets Glenn Miller later?

[52:36] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[52:37] They befriend the horn section to the band.

Elliott Kalan

[52:40] In that they then meet Steve Miller.

Dan McCoy

[52:43] Yeah.

[52:44] Some people call me a space cowboy?

[52:47] Yeah, yeah.

[52:48] But I have an AKA, an alias, if you will, and that's Gangster of Love.

[52:53] Uh-huh, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[52:54] But on the other hand, on the other hand, some know me by another.

[52:57] Some would say equally adventurous nom de plume, Maurice.

[53:01] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[53:02] Ooh.

Elliott Kalan

[53:04] They all go.

[53:05] Abracadabra.

[53:06] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[53:08] Then he reaches out and grabs them.

[53:11] It's very rude.

[53:12] They just met.

Elliott Kalan

[53:13] But they let you do that when you're rich.

[53:15] That's something that our horrible president said a long time ago.

[53:17] Uh-huh.

Dan McCoy

[53:19] They, the holograms befriend the horn section to Ben Tiller's band.

[53:26] In the Ben Tiller Orchestra, yeah.

[53:27] Yeah.

[53:27] And they convince Tiller to let them sit in with the band that evening.

[53:32] And they sing a patriotic swing-inflected number, another song, another music video called

[53:38] We're Making It Happen, but that concert is interrupted by Falling Bombs, Cliphanger, Commercial.

[53:46] Guys, what do you think?

[53:47] How do you think this is going to resolve?

[53:49] What are you going to happen?

[53:49] They're all going to die.

Stuart Wellington

[53:50] They're all going to die.

[53:51] Wow.

[53:51] I think they single-handedly throw back the Hun.

Elliott Kalan

[53:56] Do you think, I mean, Hitler is bombing from a Zeppelin or something?

[54:00] Yes.

[54:00] And they're able to, with the power of music, they just pop the Zeppelin and it crashes.

[54:04] Yeah.

[54:04] Uh-huh.

[54:04] Yeah.

[54:05] And he goes, wish I weren't here.

Dan McCoy

[54:08] That's the sequel to Spank the Monkey song, Pop the Zeppelin.

[54:14] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[54:16] Okay.

[54:16] Do they go to another time period, Dan?

[54:18] Does that save them at the last minute?

Dan McCoy

[54:20] Yeah.

[54:20] Well, that's, you're showing your, of course, TV writing.

Elliott Kalan

[54:24] Yeah, you're a professional writer.

[54:26] I'm a professional television writer, yeah.

[54:27] Yeah, you know.

[54:28] Leaving Ben Tiller to die in the fiery holocaust of the bombing.

Dan McCoy

[54:34] Okay, well, clearly you guys are on tinterhooks, so I'll just let you know how this revolves.

[54:40] Thank you.

Dan McCoy

[54:40] You sure are.

[54:41] Back from commercial, rubble falls all around them, but the holograms are saved by, yes,

[54:46] yet another time jump.

[54:47] Tech Rat tries to figure out the time machine in the present.

[54:50] And more and more people are being pulled from the past, and the misfits are disgusted by the appearance of a group of hippies.

Elliott Kalan

[54:58] Awesome.

[54:59] I mean, to be honest, they would be.

[55:01] If these were the, I mean, if these were punks, then they would be disgusted by a group of hippies.

Dan McCoy

[55:05] No, they're so annoyed that, like, hippies are here now.

[55:08] Zaz insults Tech Rat for not being able to fix his own time machine, which is fair.

[55:13] And in retaliation, he sends the misfits back in time and pulls more hippies into the future.

[55:20] Oh, no.

Elliott Kalan

[55:20] Oh, no.

[55:21] Just what they didn't need.

[55:23] The holograms are at Woodstock, where they meet.

[55:25] Tell me, are these hippies, is this, like, a fun, like, cool version of a hippie?

[55:30] Or is it, like, the kind of hippie you'd see in a cartoon in the 70s where it's, like, filthy, no shoes, their clothes are ragged?

Dan McCoy

[55:37] It's the Manson family.

[55:39] I think it's closer to the latter.

[55:41] They, like, they seem affable enough, but also, like, you don't want to hang out with these guys.

[55:46] Sure, sure, yeah.

[55:48] In the past.

Elliott Kalan

[55:49] It's so funny.

[55:50] They turn out to be the Manson family.

[55:51] They're so much more intense than the misfits.

Dan McCoy

[55:54] The holograms are at Woodstock now.

[55:58] Oh, yeah.

[55:58] And they meet Johnny Beldrix, which is this world's Jimmy Hendrix.

Stuart Wellington

[56:03] And he's a right-handed guitar player.

[56:05] And he douses a fire on his guitar.

[56:09] Yep.

Elliott Kalan

[56:10] And he is mad because his manager.

[56:12] When he plays O Canada on it.

[56:14] Yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[56:18] Yeah, like, all beneath the watchtower.

Elliott Kalan

[56:23] Technically a cover of a Bob Dylan song, but you know that.

[56:26] He's mad.

[56:27] He says, excuse me while I kiss the ground.

Dan McCoy

[56:33] Bizarro Hendrix.

Elliott Kalan

[56:35] He says, are you inexperienced?

Dan McCoy

[56:41] Acoustic Ladyland.

[56:42] Anyway.

[56:42] Purple clarity.

[56:47] Domesticated doggy lady.

Elliott Kalan

[56:51] By the way.

[56:52] Isn't a faunty lady.

Dan McCoy

[56:53] Should I send back this purple Claritin I got?

[56:55] It might be tampered with.

[56:59] The Misfits.

[57:01] He's mad because his manager wants him to play with these crazy chicks called the Misfits.

[57:07] And that raises a lot of questions about when these two bands arrived relative to one another.

[57:12] But I guess there's a time machine.

[57:14] So I'm not going to think about it.

Elliott Kalan

[57:14] It's time travel, Dan.

[57:15] It's not linear.

Dan McCoy

[57:17] I've watched Primer and Looper and all that shit.

[57:21] Yeah.

[57:22] All of theirs.

[57:23] Meanwhile, Synergy is trapped in a semi-truck that's trying to play.

[57:27] Wait, what?

[57:27] Say that again?

[57:28] How did Synergy get in this truck?

[57:30] I don't know whether she, like, zapped into the semi-truck or someone stole her.

[57:34] She's driving away, apparently.

[57:36] She's running out of power.

[57:37] The holograms of the Misfits confront one another on stage.

[57:41] Jim creates a hologram of Eric to forbid the Misfits from playing with Beldrix because they're exclusively assigned to him.

[57:50] Interesting.

[57:50] Okay.

[57:51] Beldrix goes on stage.

[57:52] You think she could just do that more often to get their way?

[57:56] Beldrix plays the Star Spangled Banner as Synergy descends from the ceiling.

Elliott Kalan

[58:00] Can't copyright that.

[58:02] Public domain, assholes.

Dan McCoy

[58:04] Synergy descends from the ceiling, shooting laser lights.

[58:09] Pizazz messes with the...

Elliott Kalan

[58:10] Wait, but I thought Synergy was in a truck, Dan.

Dan McCoy

[58:12] Yeah, well, I guess the idea is some roadies found Synergy and they're like, this is exactly the sort of zazz that Woodstock needs.

Elliott Kalan

[58:21] This is what Johnny Beldrix needs for his act, man.

[58:25] So Synergy also traveled through time with them?

Dan McCoy

[58:27] Yes.

[58:28] This whole time.

[58:29] I don't know why.

[58:30] Like, the first time was like they were standing next to each other.

[58:32] I don't know why later on.

[58:33] I guess because she was unstuck in time, so the time machine's like, this has got to go, too.

[58:39] Synergy was selling a bunch of what?

Stuart Wellington

[58:41] Brown acid?

[58:42] What was the bad one?

[58:43] Yeah, I think it was the brown acid.

[58:45] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[58:45] I mean, all of it's pretty bad for you.

[58:49] Oh, no.

[58:50] I've done some experimentation.

[58:52] Unless you want to open the doors of perception.

[58:54] Thank you.

[58:55] But I feel like if I open the doors for perception, I'm just going to walk through and start listening to Pink Floyd's Steely Dan, and I don't know if I'm ready for that.

Dan McCoy

[59:02] Yeah, yeah.

[59:02] That third time could be closed for a little bit longer.

[59:05] You don't want to invite perception into your house because then...

Elliott Kalan

[59:09] No, no.

[59:10] Of course.

[59:10] Then it can come and go whenever it pleases.

[59:12] Yeah.

[59:13] You mean perception, the vampire stripper?

[59:17] Sounds sexy.

[59:19] What are we doing?

[59:20] Dan?

[59:20] There's nothing sexier.

[59:23] Yeah.

[59:25] Sounds sexy, says Dan of Obvious Monthly Magazine.

Dan McCoy

[59:30] So, Pizazz.

[59:32] Pizazz messes with the ropes that are hoisting Synergy down to the stage.

[59:37] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[59:37] It seems like a strange way to bring Synergy onto the stage.

[59:41] You think you just wheel her on.

[59:43] Yes.

Dan McCoy

[59:44] Well, no.

[59:44] It's dramatic.

[59:45] You know, from the heavens, these lights come down.

[59:47] Yeah, that's true.

[59:48] Before she crashes, Tech Rat has finally figured it out, sending everyone back to the past.

[59:55] Both bands come home.

[59:57] The misfits, having returned home, attack Eric, thinking that he blew their chances at playing Woodstock and being part of the history.

[1:00:05] And they said...

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:06] They would have hated being part of Woodstock, right?

Dan McCoy

[1:00:08] Yeah.

[1:00:08] I mean, I guess it's...

[1:00:09] You're famous or whatever.

[1:00:10] I mean, it's a legend, you know.

[1:00:12] They, in retaliation, send him back in time where he's threatened by a dinosaur, which also brings...

[1:00:18] Threatened?

[1:00:19] Which also brings...

[1:00:20] Yeah, the dinosaur pulls a gun on him.

[1:00:21] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:22] Yeah.

[1:00:23] Cut you, man.

Dan McCoy

[1:00:24] Somebody call an ambulance for you.

[1:00:26] And that brings a dino to the present.

[1:00:29] Cool.

[1:00:30] Where it smashes the time machine, which I guess zaps Eric back.

[1:00:33] Okay.

[1:00:34] And then...

[1:00:35] As opposed to leaving it there forever, which is what really happened.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:37] But that was like Tech Rat's life's work, right?

Dan McCoy

[1:00:39] Yeah.

[1:00:39] Well, I mean, he whipped it up in like a week.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:41] Yeah, he didn't write anything down so it could never be made again.

Dan McCoy

[1:00:44] No, never again.

[1:00:45] I know you guys are all worried about the World History of Music concert.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:50] I feel like I'm more worried about it than the makers of the show are.

Dan McCoy

[1:00:54] Jam and the holograms.

[1:00:55] Go there.

[1:00:56] They play their new song, Rockin' Down Through Time, which has been inspired by all of the

[1:01:03] musical figures they met on their adventure.

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:06] And it was Mozart.

[1:01:07] Then it was a kind of off-brand Glenn Miller.

[1:01:10] Well, that's the weird thing.

Dan McCoy

[1:01:10] I was about to say, this song name checks Glenn Miller.

[1:01:15] Just says Glenn Miller.

[1:01:16] So I guess they could use his name in like the real context, but not for their faux character.

Stuart Wellington

[1:01:23] My guess is...

[1:01:24] Well, they sent over the character sketch.

[1:01:27] Yeah.

[1:01:27] And Glenn Miller didn't approve, I guess.

[1:01:29] The ghost of Glenn Miller was like...

[1:01:31] It makes me look bad.

[1:01:32] I don't like it.

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:32] My guess is that they wrote the song and recorded it and then found out, oh, you're not allowed

[1:01:38] to use his name.

[1:01:38] Oh, well, we'll just call him Stem Giller or whatever his name is.

[1:01:41] You know.

[1:01:42] Anyway, that's the end of the episode.

Dan McCoy

[1:01:45] I got one more of these.

[1:01:47] Okay.

[1:01:47] One more episode?

[1:01:48] Oh, boy.

[1:01:50] No, we can get through this.

[1:01:52] But this one's fun.

[1:01:52] No, no, no, no, no.

[1:01:53] We can get through it.

[1:01:54] This one you're going to enjoy.

[1:01:56] This one's called The Presidential Dilemma.

[1:01:59] It's from Season 2, Episode 17.

[1:02:04] And it starts with secret agents showing up at Starlight Mansion.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:08] This should have been our BOCO this year.

[1:02:10] Just Tim and the Holy Grains episodes, yeah.

[1:02:12] So secret agents show up at Starlight House?

[1:02:14] Yeah.

[1:02:15] To do what?

[1:02:16] They've got a personal invitation from the president.

[1:02:19] To someone else's house?

[1:02:21] No, he wants jamming the holograms.

[1:02:23] Oh, I see.

[1:02:24] They're delivering it.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:25] Yeah, they're delivering an invitation.

[1:02:26] He wants jamming the holograms to play for them at the Kennedy Center next week.

[1:02:31] The Trump and Kennedy Center.

[1:02:32] Not anymore.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:33] They took it off.

[1:02:35] They say they took it off.

[1:02:36] They put a curtain in front of it.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:37] I'll celebrate whatever small victories we have.

[1:02:41] Jam goes to the theater early to check it out.

[1:02:45] But the new security system there, which seems to be just a bunch of little satellite dishes,

[1:02:52] messes with Synergy's signal.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:54] Uh-oh.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:55] So Jerica has to make a hasty excuse for Jim's sudden disappearance.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:00] Now, I'm hearing a lot about Synergy's signal getting messed with in these episodes.

[1:03:04] But you have to admit, this is Wi-Fi technology in the 80s.

[1:03:08] Oh, it's pretty impressive.

[1:03:09] It's pretty impressive.

Dan McCoy

[1:03:10] Yeah.

[1:03:10] It also seems to span several miles at the point.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:14] And potentially eras where there is no electricity.

[1:03:18] I mean, this is fantastic technology.

[1:03:20] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:03:21] Yeah.

[1:03:22] So, to solve this issue of Synergy not operating at the Kennedy Center, Jim asked Kimber to take Synergy apart and ship her to Washington so the signal can get through.

[1:03:35] Meanwhile, the misfits—

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:37] I feel like we know that thing fits on a truck.

[1:03:39] I don't know why you have to take it apart to ship it.

[1:03:41] Just stick it on a truck.

[1:03:42] Yeah.

[1:03:42] True.

[1:03:43] Meanwhile, the misfits are watching—

[1:03:44] Because they're just going to put the parts on a truck also.

[1:03:46] No, you take it apart.

Stuart Wellington

[1:03:48] You put them in garbage bags.

[1:03:50] You toss them in the Miami bed like Dexter.

[1:03:53] No.

[1:03:54] The misfits—

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:55] It's the computer that kills other computers.

[1:03:58] The misfits are watching a music.

[1:03:59] That's basically IG-88.

[1:04:01] It's called .comster.

[1:04:03] It's the computer that kills other computers.

[1:04:05] IG-88, but IG takes flesh bounties also.

[1:04:08] Yeah, he doesn't give a shit.

[1:04:09] He doesn't just kill droids.

[1:04:10] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[1:04:12] I don't know about him.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:13] The misfits.

[1:04:14] Oh, let me tell you about him.

[1:04:15] Anyway, he's a bounty hunter droid.

Dan McCoy

[1:04:17] The misfits are watching a news report.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:19] What makes him different from Forlom?

[1:04:22] Well, he's a different person.

[1:04:24] Well, one, they're different names, and they look different.

[1:04:26] But IG-88 is rebelled, I believe, against his programmer and killed his programmer,

[1:04:30] whereas Forlom, I think, was a protocol droid reprogrammed by Zuckus.

[1:04:34] By Zuckus, yeah.

[1:04:35] And the two of them are best buds.

[1:04:36] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:04:36] Yeah, they're two dudes.

[1:04:38] And Zuckus is the one with, like, fly eyes.

[1:04:41] Yes, fly eyes.

[1:04:42] Yeah, yeah, like kind of tubes coming out of his face.

Stuart Wellington

[1:04:43] And he's the one who isn't Bosk.

[1:04:46] Bosk is a Trandoshan.

[1:04:47] He's a lizard man.

[1:04:48] And again, no, that's Dengar.

[1:04:50] That's Dengar.

[1:04:51] And remember, Bosk is not Bosch, who your dad loves.

[1:04:55] Yeah, that's true.

[1:04:56] I read the Bosch novels.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:58] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1:04:59] Well, you're at the Steely Dad age.

[1:05:01] Yeah, you're at the Steely Dad.

[1:05:02] Just because they don't have kids.

[1:05:04] And I've read some Bosk novels where he's solving crimes.

Stuart Wellington

[1:05:07] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1:05:07] That's Tales from Millsizely Canteen.

[1:05:10] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:11] We did used to have a lift the flat book about Bosk on a mission.

[1:05:15] So I have read a Bosk book.

[1:05:16] But not a Bosch book.

[1:05:18] Dan, should I read some Bosch novels?

Dan McCoy

[1:05:20] What are your feelings on sort of modern, hard-boiled detective fiction?

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:27] You know what?

[1:05:28] It's not what I gravitate towards.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:30] Yeah, well, you can skip it.

[1:05:32] Okay.

[1:05:32] Anyway.

[1:05:33] I'll just go back to reading Wallace Shawn Plays, which is what I'm currently in the middle of.

[1:05:37] Back in the world of jam.

[1:05:38] The Misfits are watching a news report about a DC thief dubbed the Washington Marauder.

[1:05:44] Sick.

[1:05:46] Marauder implies more than thievery, yeah.

[1:05:47] This is followed by an announcement about Jem playing the Kennedy Center, which inspires the Misfits to try and set up their own concert in Washington without Eric's help.

[1:05:59] In pursuit of this, of course, the Misfits burst onto the floor of Congress, demanding equal time with Jem and sing the strangely ominous song, Star-Spangled Fantasy.

[1:06:13] Oh, okay.

[1:06:14] They are thrown out of the Capitol building.

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:15] So you're saying January 6th was the second time that someone had stormed the Capitol building, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:06:21] Now, the band, the holograms, that is, check into their hotel with Synergy and the Misfits.

[1:06:27] The Watergate.

[1:06:28] Who are somehow nearby disguised as housekeeping staff.

[1:06:31] Oh, wait.

[1:06:32] So Synergy got there.

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:34] That was not a complication.

Dan McCoy

[1:06:35] Well, it will become a complication.

[1:06:37] Oh, okay.

[1:06:37] Okay.

[1:06:38] That's fair.

[1:06:38] They're checking into the hotel with Synergy.

[1:06:40] Watergate Hotel.

[1:06:41] The Misfits are nearby.

[1:06:41] Or the Willard.

[1:06:42] They are disguised as housekeeping staff.

[1:06:45] Of course.

[1:06:45] They already knew that they needed to do this.

[1:06:48] They're all in maid uniforms.

[1:06:50] They hear—

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:50] I just want to—

[1:06:51] Should I admit that that is a Venn diagram, a fetish Venn diagram that I find a little appealing at the moment?

[1:06:57] Yeah.

[1:06:58] Which is punk maid?

Dan McCoy

[1:07:00] Mm-hmm.

[1:07:00] No, I can see it.

[1:07:01] I can see it 100%.

[1:07:03] Okay.

[1:07:03] They overhear Kimber say that there is no show without this equipment.

[1:07:07] Oh.

[1:07:08] So, of course, they immediately plot to steal Synergy and they call Eric, who promises to take care of it.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:13] That should be like number one fucking action item for the Misfits every time, right?

[1:07:18] Destroy their supercomputer that gives them their powers?

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:20] Yeah.

[1:07:20] It makes them rock stars?

[1:07:22] Yeah, I think so.

[1:07:22] Yeah.

[1:07:23] It's number one.

[1:07:23] Now, I ask you the favor—

[1:07:24] I thought they were trying to do this without Eric, but they'd go run into daddy as soon as they have a question.

Dan McCoy

[1:07:28] I really don't know why earlier on they're like—the show makes a point of like Eric being like, I'm not going to help you with this.

[1:07:35] And then later on, he's like, sure, I'm on board.

[1:07:38] It's kind of weird.

[1:07:39] But now this next scene—

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:41] Because I imagine they wrote the scene where the Misfits go to Congress and they're like, Eric would never stand for that.

[1:07:45] It's not in his character.

Dan McCoy

[1:07:49] He's a lawful evil, not chaotic evil.

[1:07:52] Thank you.

[1:07:53] Exactly, yeah.

[1:07:54] Now, I ask you, don't interrupt this next paragraph until I give you the word.

[1:07:59] I'll try my best.

[1:08:00] Okay.

[1:08:00] Because this one is pretty great.

[1:08:02] Now, we cut to Kimber.

[1:08:04] She's watching a news report with the Washington Marauder.

[1:08:08] He is wearing a Hamburglar-style mask and a tri-corner hat, and he threatens to steal the country's greatest national treasure.

[1:08:16] And in reaction to this, Kimber says, this is too weird, and gets up from the couch and walks away.

[1:08:23] And I have never been more seen as a viewer of the episode.

[1:08:28] It's like she like sees outside her life.

[1:08:32] It's just like, what?

[1:08:35] Anyway, it's the greatest moment in the episode.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:37] I love it.

[1:08:38] That's pretty good.

[1:08:38] So, he's like a tea party guy?

Stuart Wellington

[1:08:40] Yeah.

[1:08:41] And he's wearing—you said a Hamburglar mask, like a Domino mask?

[1:08:44] Like a Domino mask.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:44] A Domino mask, but it's mostly—officially, they're known as Hamburglar masks.

[1:08:48] Yeah.

[1:08:49] Yeah.

[1:08:50] In today's parlance.

[1:08:51] A lot of people think it's named after the Hamburglar, but actually, it was called a Hamburglar mask long before the Hamburglar existed.

[1:08:57] Yeah, because it came from Hamburglar Germany.

[1:09:01] Exactly.

[1:09:02] Where the law stated you had to wear a mask around your eyes.

[1:09:04] Yeah, you didn't wear one of those masks.

Dan McCoy

[1:09:06] Now, just as they're finishing reassembling Synergy, Jim gets a call to have dinner with the president.

[1:09:13] And at the White House—

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:14] Classic.

[1:09:15] Which president is it?

Dan McCoy

[1:09:16] Well, this is—you know what?

[1:09:18] He doesn't appear to be a caricature of any particular president.

[1:09:24] Okay.

[1:09:25] Kiefer Sutherland from 24?

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:28] He's got a little bit of like—

[1:09:30] Wait, he wasn't the president in 24, was he?

Dan McCoy

[1:09:32] No, he wasn't.

[1:09:33] He was just a—he was a national security agent at some time.

[1:09:37] Something like that, yeah.

[1:09:39] Dennis Haysbert was the president, right?

[1:09:40] I believe Dennis Haysbert either was or became the president.

[1:09:43] Yeah.

[1:09:44] Yeah, Terry Jones was also a president later on.

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:46] Terry Jones was president, but he was born in England.

[1:09:48] He can't be president of the United States.

[1:09:52] What?

[1:09:53] He would be a hilarious president.

Dan McCoy

[1:09:56] Rest in peace.

[1:09:56] So, anyway, at the White House, they discover they've been pranked.

[1:10:00] The president did not invite them to dinner.

[1:10:02] Oh, no.

[1:10:02] He is currently busy in a meeting about the Washington Marauder.

[1:10:06] On their way home—

[1:10:07] Because the president does deal with local crime stories a lot.

[1:10:11] On their way home, Jim wonders, who would want to prank us?

[1:10:15] And Kimber says, I can think of four people.

[1:10:18] Their first initial is M, which I liked.

[1:10:21] Oh, yeah.

[1:10:22] No, that's good.

[1:10:23] At the hotel, someone pulls the plug on Synergy, and the holograms arrive to see men stealing her.

[1:10:29] They follow her.

[1:10:30] They follow the truck with Synergy.

[1:10:32] See, you just put her on a truck.

[1:10:34] Where is she being taken?

[1:10:36] The Pentagon.

[1:10:38] Oh.

[1:10:38] What does the Pentagon want with Synergy?

Elliott Kalan

[1:10:41] I mean, that's a question that you don't even have to bother asking.

[1:10:44] We know the answer to that.

[1:10:45] They want to be rock stars.

Dan McCoy

[1:10:47] Turns out the FBI got tipped off about some mysterious equipment, and they need to examine it.

[1:10:54] Synergy is being taken apart as Jim sings the song, Time is Running Out.

[1:10:59] And we see—

[1:11:00] Yeah, well, maybe don't sing.

[1:11:01] Go rescue your computer friend.

[1:11:02] Yeah.

[1:11:05] What?

Elliott Kalan

[1:11:07] Dan, you'll notice, is perplexed by his own notes.

Dan McCoy

[1:11:11] Oh, okay.

[1:11:12] Sorry.

[1:11:13] Yeah, the holograms are trying to, like, sort of, like, run past the Secret Service to save Synergy.

[1:11:18] Sure.

[1:11:19] Of course, they all get shot.

[1:11:20] Yeah.

[1:11:21] Seeing time is running out.

[1:11:23] And we see her using what remains of Synergy's holographic powers before she gets sucked down to try and scare the Secret Service with attacking bald eagles, buffalo, and British redcoats.

[1:11:37] Oh, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:11:39] Now, why didn't they just use the holograms to make them look like the president?

[1:11:41] They could just walk in and take that step.

[1:11:43] Good point.

Dan McCoy

[1:11:44] Wow.

[1:11:44] That would have been a smarter play.

[1:11:46] But no matter what, the hologram—

[1:11:49] No, I think buffaloes attacking works better.

[1:11:52] The distractions are too late.

[1:11:54] Synergy gets shut down, and agents surround the band.

[1:11:57] Oh, no.

[1:11:58] But they're rescued from jail and probable extradition to Guantanamo by the president, who happens to be nearby.

[1:12:07] He wants to know more about this Synergy, but Jim refuses to tell.

[1:12:12] He relents on the testing and takes the band to where Synergy is being examined, but the Washington marauder cuts the lights.

[1:12:20] And when they come back on—

[1:12:21] There is a lot going on in this episode.

[1:12:24] When they come back on, the president—

Elliott Kalan

[1:12:26] Now, I thought the one where they were going back in time meeting different people from musical history was a complicated one, but this is much more complicated.

[1:12:32] No, this is amazing.

[1:12:33] This is Robert Altman's gem in the holograms.

Dan McCoy

[1:12:36] When the lights come back on, the president is gone.

[1:12:40] The marauder has kidnapped him, and he's racing away with Jerica clinging to the back of his van.

[1:12:47] Cliffhanger.

[1:12:48] Guys, how on earth is this going to resolve?

Stuart Wellington

[1:12:50] Shit.

[1:12:51] Okay, so I think Eric Raymond steals—is the marauder.

[1:12:59] Hmm.

[1:13:01] And he dies of a broken heart.

[1:13:06] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[1:13:07] I mean, non-joke answer, I think Jim is going to save the president, and so they're all okay, and they get Synergy back.

[1:13:13] Joke answer, the Soviets nuke Washington knowing that the president is out of commission, and America has to live under the heavy boots of the communist Cossack plague.

Dan McCoy

[1:13:28] Yeah, let's find out.

[1:13:28] Yeah.

[1:13:30] Before we get back into it, I want to apologize to the listener.

[1:13:34] I'm doing a lot of—

[1:13:35] For how long this is going?

[1:13:36] Well, no, because I'm doing a lot of reading off of my notes in this one, and already not necessarily the top of my core competencies, but also I have recently started having Invisalign because I have bite problems.

[1:13:54] And so I find that I'm having a lot more talking issues than normal, so I apologize.

[1:14:01] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:14:01] That shouldn't be an issue.

[1:14:02] It's not like you're a professional podcaster.

[1:14:03] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[1:14:05] What?

[1:14:06] Uh-oh.

[1:14:08] Back from commercial.

Elliott Kalan

[1:14:09] They were like, now, this Invisalign will give you trouble.

[1:14:14] Will you just say something if you're a professional podcaster?

[1:14:16] But before I do that, let me just numb your mouth so I can put the Invisalign in.

Stuart Wellington

[1:14:19] Oh, oh, oh, oh.

[1:14:21] Yeah.

[1:14:22] Woo.

Dan McCoy

[1:14:23] Backroom commercial.

[1:14:25] The Marauder explains that he just wants to add the president to his collection, his collection of national treasures.

[1:14:32] It's a private museum that makes the Smithsonian look like a garage sale, he says.

[1:14:37] And sure enough, this is hidden underground in a James Bond villain-style base that made me wonder, like, who is funding this man?

[1:14:46] How does he—how can he do this?

[1:14:48] He's probably a tech billionaire or whatever.

[1:14:50] But anyway, the—

[1:14:52] The most altruistic thing, rationally, for me to do would be to steal all this stuff.

[1:14:55] He's got a very popular YouTube channel, yeah.

[1:14:56] Mm-hmm.

[1:14:56] Yeah, yeah.

[1:14:57] Exactly.

[1:14:59] The band simultaneously are racing to put Synergy back together.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:04] Now, you mean—

[1:15:05] So Jerika—

[1:15:05] The band, you mean, Jem and the holograms, not the band, the band.

Dan McCoy

[1:15:08] No, no, not the band.

[1:15:11] No, not the last waltz, the band.

[1:15:13] Okay.

[1:15:13] The holograms, while Jerika is off on this, they're trying to put Synergy back together so she will have her hologram powers.

[1:15:20] The Marauder's plan—

[1:15:22] Secret Service has really fallen down on the job.

[1:15:25] No, no.

[1:15:26] A rock band needs to take over the protection of the president.

[1:15:30] Now, the Marauder is—he wants to put the president in a cage made up to look like the Oval Office.

[1:15:37] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:38] I mean, in some ways, the Oval Office is a cage, you know?

[1:15:40] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:15:41] Oh, boy.

[1:15:41] Don't I know it.

[1:15:43] What does that mean?

[1:15:43] I don't know.

[1:15:44] I've never been the president.

[1:15:45] I don't know why I've said it that way.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:46] Not yet, Dan.

[1:15:47] Don't limit yourself.

Dan McCoy

[1:15:48] Yeah, I think there's a chance.

[1:15:50] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:15:51] This is—to waste more time, my younger son told me he'd like me to run for president in the next election.

[1:15:56] I'm like, yeah, okay, sure, I will.

[1:15:58] So I'm just going to tell people I'm going to run for president in, what, 2028?

[1:16:03] Sure.

[1:16:03] I'm on the—put me on the ballot.

[1:16:04] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:16:05] In England, they've got a robot man running for office right now.

[1:16:08] Yeah, Benhead.

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:09] I mean, he's not running for president.

[1:16:10] He's running for a seat in parliament.

[1:16:12] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:16:14] I mean, certainly a better choice than Farage, so sure.

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:17] For sure.

[1:16:18] For sure.

Stuart Wellington

[1:16:18] Yeah, I mean, he seems like he has that kind of personality that'll work well in a group setting.

Elliott Kalan

[1:16:23] I read that one of his big promises is to move the hand dryer in the men's room of this one pub to a more convenient location.

[1:16:31] Sounds good.

Dan McCoy

[1:16:33] Noticeably improve people's lives.

[1:16:34] Grassroots.

[1:16:34] That's my motto, yeah.

[1:16:37] Anyway, so, yeah, the marauder wants to put the president in an Oval Office cage.

[1:16:41] When Jerika tries to intervene, she is restrained by goons, and she grabs a heavy cup to attack them.

[1:16:48] And the marauder goes, stop, don't touch that.

[1:16:51] It's Paul Revere's chalice.

[1:16:53] It's priceless.

[1:16:54] Okay.

[1:16:55] And while he is distracted, the president grabs Lincoln's cane to use as a weapon.

[1:17:01] Now, Elliot.

Elliott Kalan

[1:17:02] All right, interesting.

[1:17:03] Did Lincoln famously have a cane?

[1:17:06] I would say that Lincoln did not famously have a cane, no.

[1:17:10] No?

[1:17:10] Okay.

[1:17:11] That is not something that I am familiar with.

Dan McCoy

[1:17:15] The idea of him having a famous cane.

[1:17:18] Misled.

[1:17:18] Yeah.

[1:17:19] That's the provenance of this cane.

Elliott Kalan

[1:17:20] It leads me to wonder if that really is Paul Revere's chalice.

[1:17:24] Yeah.

[1:17:25] Yeah.

[1:17:27] This is not the cup of a carpenter.

[1:17:30] Cup of a humble silverman.

Dan McCoy

[1:17:32] Yeah.

[1:17:33] Now, the Secret Service burst in to try and pull the holograms away from synergy.

[1:17:39] Yeah, of course.

[1:17:39] They reactivate her just in time so that Jim is able to use her hologram powers to manifest.

[1:17:46] She's able to manifest George Washington, Abe Lincoln, and Teddy Roosevelt to shame the marauder.

[1:17:53] Three quarters of Mount Rushmore right there.

[1:17:55] Thomas Jefferson was too busy to appear in the show.

[1:17:58] We know what he was doing.

[1:18:00] These three, this League of Hollow Presidents charge the burglar, and he locks himself inside the Oval Office cage for protection.

Elliott Kalan

[1:18:11] Now, I will say this.

[1:18:12] If you're going to get three presidents to help you in a fight like this, these are good guys to do it.

[1:18:16] I mean, George Washington, battle-hardened.

[1:18:18] I'm sure we'll cover young Washington at some point.

[1:18:21] It's supposed to be ridiculous.

[1:18:22] Abraham Lincoln, again.

[1:18:24] Got a lot of reach.

[1:18:25] Reach.

[1:18:25] Got a lot of reach, but also like, you know, when he was young, he was an amateur wrestler, as everybody was on the frontier back then.

[1:18:30] Got a lot of muscles.

[1:18:31] And Teddy Roosevelt, as we know, amateur boxer, you know, sportsman hunter.

[1:18:35] These are three guys who know the rough rider.

[1:18:36] And he can morph into a bear, right?

[1:18:38] He can morph into, well, they can all morph into, I mean, George Washington can morph into a bald eagle.

[1:18:42] Teddy Roosevelt can morph into a bear.

[1:18:44] And Abraham Lincoln, of course, can morph into kind of a sad horse.

[1:18:48] Then when they combine, of course.

[1:18:50] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[1:18:50] They become an eagle horse bear.

Stuart Wellington

[1:18:53] And all he can do is roll around going, kill me, kill me.

[1:18:57] I've seen the substance.

Dan McCoy

[1:18:59] Yeah.

[1:19:00] So, on their drive back from their adventure.

Elliott Kalan

[1:19:04] Because all presidents get the power to transform into an animal of their choice.

Dan McCoy

[1:19:09] On their drive back, the president asks how any of what he just saw was possible.

[1:19:14] That's a good question.

[1:19:15] And Jim reveals her secret to him.

[1:19:19] At the press conference about his rescue, it looks for a moment like he's going to spill the beans.

[1:19:25] But, of course, it's a fake out.

[1:19:26] Unlike our current commander-in-chief, this president is trustworthy.

[1:19:30] Four more years.

[1:19:31] Four more years.

[1:19:32] At the Kennedy Center at the concert.

[1:19:36] Jim and the Holograms singing freedom about all the great American freedoms we thought were enshrined forever back when this cartoon was made.

[1:19:46] Yeah.

[1:19:47] And finally, we're reaching the end.

[1:19:49] The Supreme Court got to it.

[1:19:50] Yeah.

[1:19:51] Backstage.

[1:19:52] The president offers Jerika the president.

[1:19:54] How is this show?

Elliott Kalan

[1:19:55] Is this episode 50 minutes long?

[1:19:58] What is going on?

Dan McCoy

[1:19:58] Honestly, this thing was so packed.

[1:20:01] When I was watching it, I'm like, oh, like 10 minutes from the end, I'm like, oh, this has got to be a two-parter.

[1:20:08] And then it just packed in the incident.

Elliott Kalan

[1:20:11] I spent, not to brag, I spent a lot of my time in edit rooms trying to get episodes down to size.

[1:20:16] They must have been squeezing whatever they could out of this thing to get it down to.

Dan McCoy

[1:20:21] It is amazing.

[1:20:22] Like, as someone who, you know, has been trying to write scripts and, like, struggling with, like, how do all these shows I love pack so much story into such a small, like, you know, gym?

[1:20:36] I got to give it its laurels.

[1:20:38] It's great at this stuff.

Elliott Kalan

[1:20:39] I will say this.

[1:20:39] I will say this, Dan.

[1:20:40] Here's part of the secret.

[1:20:41] When you're watching a TV show, what's the missing element you don't have when you're writing a script?

[1:20:45] Performance.

[1:20:46] Yeah.

[1:20:46] You can get a lot across with performance, and that means you can cut dialogue.

[1:20:50] It means you can save time.

[1:20:51] That's a little tip from one who knows.

[1:20:53] Wink.

[1:20:54] The more you know.

Dan McCoy

[1:20:56] That was a little.

[1:20:57] It's a different one, right?

[1:20:58] Oh.

[1:20:58] It's a different thing.

[1:20:59] Wait.

[1:21:00] And now you know.

[1:21:01] And knowing is half the battle.

[1:21:02] Knowing is half the battle.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:03] I mean, they're all things that exist.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:05] They're all things.

[1:21:06] That's the beauty of it.

[1:21:07] They're all things.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:08] Everything, everywhere, all at once.

[1:21:10] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:10] Well, final paragraph of this episode, synopsis backstage.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:16] This is the longest mini.

[1:21:18] It really is.

[1:21:20] The president.

[1:21:21] Good God.

[1:21:21] And it's about Jem and the holograms.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:24] The president offers Jerica the president.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:26] We did an episode with Alonzo Duralde about queer representation in film, and it is not as long as our Jem and the hologram tour de force.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:36] But in some ways, isn't this also a pride episode?

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:40] Dan's pride and his knowledge about Jem and the holograms.

[1:21:42] Continue, please.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:44] Backstage.

[1:21:44] The president offers Jerica the presidential medal of honor.

[1:21:48] And Jerica says.

Elliott Kalan

[1:21:49] Highest civilian award, yeah.

[1:21:51] Jerica says.

[1:21:51] Presidential medal of freedom is the highest one, I guess, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:21:53] If anyone deserves a medal, it's Synergy.

[1:21:56] What?

[1:21:56] And the president, to his credit, does not go, she's a computer, you idiot.

[1:22:02] He just promises that the next time that she visits Washington, Synergy will be treated with the utmost respect, which causes Synergy to manifest as a projection outside the computer.

[1:22:13] And she says.

[1:22:14] That's the best news I've heard all week.

[1:22:16] And the three of them share a good laugh.

[1:22:20] And that's the end of the episode.

Elliott Kalan

[1:22:22] I can only imagine that they were so spent from having to come up with this story that they did not have any energy left for an actually funny last line.

Dan McCoy

[1:22:30] I don't know.

[1:22:30] It was pretty funny when I was watching it.

Elliott Kalan

[1:22:32] That's the best news I've heard all week.

[1:22:34] You would think the president would have a heart attack instantly when a woman jumped out of a computer at it.

[1:22:38] What?

Dan McCoy

[1:22:40] So I hope, guys, that number one, I hope that now you understand a little bit more about Jim and the Hologram.

[1:22:47] Oh, yeah.

[1:22:47] The thing that will help you in your day to day life.

[1:22:48] Anything I understand less, I feel like.

[1:22:50] Yeah.

[1:22:52] It's really news you can use for sure, yeah.

[1:22:54] You understand my strange affection for this show and why if I come home late at night, this is the thing that I'm like, I'm going to put an episode of Jim on.

Elliott Kalan

[1:23:06] You know what, Dan?

[1:23:07] I do understand that more.

[1:23:09] You've talked about Jim and the Holograms a number of times in our private life.

[1:23:13] And I've always been like, is it time to talk about putting Dan in a home?

Dan McCoy

[1:23:18] Yeah, I was going to say.

[1:23:19] But now I kind of get it.

Elliott Kalan

[1:23:20] Now I kind of get it, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:23:21] Well, at least I've gotten that far.

[1:23:24] Hey, this is a show that is part of a network.

[1:23:28] That network is called.

[1:23:30] If they don't kick us out for this one, yeah.

[1:23:31] That network is called Maximum Fun.

[1:23:33] If you go to MaximumFun.org, you can check out the other great shows on this network.

[1:23:37] And you know what?

[1:23:40] This show is only possible because we have the support of people who have gone to MaximumFun.org and become members and keep supporting us.

[1:23:53] So thank you to all of those.

[1:23:56] And I want to say thank you to our producer, Alex Smith.

[1:24:02] He goes by the name Howell Doughty.

[1:24:05] And he'll be joining us.

Elliott Kalan

[1:24:06] He'll be joining us.

[1:24:07] In September in Louisville, Kentucky.

[1:24:09] Go to plophousepodcast.com slash events.

Dan McCoy

[1:24:12] If I seemed a little slow on the talking there for a second, I was trying to pull up.

[1:24:20] In the past, I recently plugged the Discord because there's a great community of people over on the Discord.

[1:24:28] If you want to maybe abandon some of the social media sites that have gotten unpleasant of late, but you still like hanging out with Flophouse folks, the Discord might be a good option for you.

[1:24:43] And that is lastnamewithheld.com.

[1:24:47] If you want to check that out, you can be a Discord member.

[1:24:51] I want to mention, because I rarely do, that we have a newsletter called Flop Secrets.

[1:24:58] If you go to flophousepodcast.com, you can sign up for the newsletter.

[1:25:03] You can get stuff like the news of, say, a Louisville, Kentucky show, as well as, you know, a little extra writing from me, Dan McCoy of the Flophouse, every other week.

[1:25:17] Yeah.

[1:25:17] Um, but, you know, that's enough plugging, especially for a really long episode.

[1:25:22] I've been Dan McCoy.

[1:25:24] I'm still Stuart Wellington after all these years.

Elliott Kalan

[1:25:27] I'm Elliot Kalin, or perhaps you know me better as Jem.

[1:25:31] Wink!

[1:25:32] What?

[1:25:32] Wow.

[1:25:39] Maximum Fun.

Dan McCoy

[1:25:40] A worker-owned network.

[1:25:42] Of artists-owned shows.

[1:25:43] Supported.

[1:25:44] Directly.

[1:25:45] By you.

FH Mini 154 - Dan Explains Jem

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