FH Mini 88 - Motion Picture Puzzle Palace

[0:00] Hey! Yep, that's right. This is a Flophouse mini. Welcome back.

Stuart Wellington

[0:09] This is a mini episode of the Flophouse podcast, a podcast that's normally about reviewing movies and talking about it.

[0:15] But instead, we're going to be doing something a little bit different.

[0:17] We are joined by our three hosts. That's right. I'm Stuart Wellington. My other hosts are...

Dan McCoy

[0:22] Dan McCoy. You're joining yourself. Sorry, go on.

Elliott Kalan

[0:26] And I'm Elliot Kalin, and I can't wait to tell you later in the episode about our next episode of Flop TV,

[0:31] which will be one week from the day this airs, and our also live show in Los Angeles, October 19th.

[0:37] I'll tell you all about that later in the episode.

[0:39] But Dan, you had a question about whether Stuart was joining himself, and I think we need to really tease this out.

Dan McCoy

[0:43] So are there two sides of your personality? One is the host and one is Stuart Wellington?

[0:50] Or were you astral?

Stuart Wellington

[0:52] That's a great question, Dan. So you are joining us.

[0:56] This is the Flophouse. This is not just a regular Flophouse.

Elliott Kalan

[0:59] So the listener is also joining us. So there's a lot of joining going on today.

Dan McCoy

[1:02] Everyone's joining.

[1:04] So welcome to...

[1:05] I wouldn't join any club that would have me as a member.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08] And they would not have you either, Dan.

[1:10] Ironically, the club that would have you as a member still would reject you.

Stuart Wellington

[1:13] Welcome to another episode of the Flophouse Motion Picture Puzzle Palace.

[1:20] Everybody's favorite game show.

[1:22] Another episode.

[1:23] It's another episode.

[1:24] It's the very first one.

Elliott Kalan

[1:25] Yeah, everybody loves MPPP.

[1:26] Yeah, the Flophouse MPPP.

[1:28] Yeah, you know me.

Stuart Wellington

[1:29] So this is a game where our two contestants, Dan McCoy and Elliot Kalin, are going to be competing for big money prizes.

[1:37] I'll tell you how much later after the show.

[1:40] After the show.

[1:41] Now, the rules of the game are as simple as they are devious.

[1:48] First rule is you guys can't use Google or IMDb at all during this game.

Elliott Kalan

[1:52] But as simple as it is devious, it might be low for both.

[1:56] It might be complicated and not devious.

Dan McCoy

[1:58] All we know is that they're at equal levels.

[2:00] Yeah.

[2:00] There's a clear ratio between the two.

Stuart Wellington

[2:03] Now, the rules of the game, I'm going to – it's broken down into categories.

[2:10] In each category, we have a number of movies.

[2:12] I'm going to name the title of a movie, give a short synopsis, and maybe a couple of the actors that play main roles.

[2:18] And you can either draw on your past experience or basically on any kind of context clues.

[2:24] And what you are each going to do is try and guess what the average user rating on IMDb for that movie is.

[2:31] Whoever gets closest gets the point.

[2:34] Okay?

[2:34] And then whoever has the most points at the end, that's right.

[2:37] They win the game.

Dan McCoy

[2:40] Okay, thank God.

[2:41] It's not like golf.

[2:42] It's very simple and devious.

Stuart Wellington

[2:44] Who knows?

[2:45] Maybe we'll do a special switcheroo.

[2:47] We'll find out.

[2:48] So, we are going to – are you guys ready to play the game?

[2:51] I'm so ready.

[2:52] Okay.

[2:52] So, before –

[2:53] Yeah, let's do it.

[2:53] Actually, before we get in here, no, let's do the first question.

[2:56] Then we'll find out a little bit about you guys.

[2:58] Okay.

[2:58] Let's do it.

[2:59] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[3:00] I didn't know there's a get-to-know-you section.

Elliott Kalan

[3:03] So, the first movie –

[3:04] Dan, this is a professional televised game show.

[3:06] There's always a get-to-know-you section for me to skip when I'm watching it later.

Stuart Wellington

[3:10] So, the first category is plain movies.

[3:14] That's right.

[3:15] Stuart Wellington –

Elliott Kalan

[3:15] Movies that are not complicated, no flavor.

[3:18] Just – no cheese on them.

[3:19] Just plain.

Stuart Wellington

[3:20] Mm.

[3:21] I mean, I don't know if you're describing the categories.

[3:23] I'm the host.

[3:24] You're just one of the contestants.

[3:25] I'm just guessing.

[3:26] Just one of the contestants.

[3:27] When you said a plane –

Elliott Kalan

[3:28] Wow.

[3:28] Or do you mean a movie that is a flat topography, that kind of plane?

Stuart Wellington

[3:32] So, the first movie is –

[3:33] So, the first movie is –

[3:34] Plane.

[3:36] Uh-huh.

[3:38] A pilot finds himself caught in a war zone after he's forced to land his commercial aircraft during a terrible storm.

[3:45] This movie stars Gerard Butler.

[3:47] Mm-hmm.

[3:48] And Michael Coulter.

[3:51] And Tony Goldwyn.

[3:54] Dan, you get the first crack at this bad boy.

[3:57] Have you seen this movie?

[3:58] Do you know anything about Plane?

Dan McCoy

[4:00] Okay.

[4:01] I – you know, I would –

[4:03] Would you describe it as anything but?

[4:06] I would describe it as it – you know, it passes the low bar of being probably the best Gerard Butler movie in a while.

[4:14] I would call it what our friends over at Blank Check would say, a gentleman's six.

[4:19] And so, in that spirit, I'm going to guess that the IMDb rating is six.

[4:24] I don't know whether I was supposed to do that yet, but I did it.

[4:27] That's fine.

[4:27] Elliot.

Elliott Kalan

[4:28] I was also going to guess a six, but I feel like now I've got to stake out different territories.

[4:32] So, I'm going to say like a 5.8.

Stuart Wellington

[4:34] Just still pretty close.

[4:35] Guys, Dan gets the point.

[4:36] 6.5.

[4:38] Wow.

[4:39] You were a little harsh.

Dan McCoy

[4:40] Well, I mean, I – honestly, I could have gone even higher.

[4:45] I do think that this is the kind of sort of like just meat and potatoes movie that the average IMDb user is not going to get so mad at that it'll drive it down, but they're not going to go gaga over it.

Stuart Wellington

[4:59] Okay, guys.

[5:00] Next movie is Snakes on a Plane.

[5:03] Ooh.

[5:04] Okay.

[5:04] Should I describe the synopsis or are you both intimately familiar with the movie?

Dan McCoy

[5:08] I saw this with Elliot maybe, but –

Elliott Kalan

[5:11] Yeah, I believe so.

[5:12] In the theaters.

[5:12] A very empty theater.

[5:14] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[5:14] I think it was us and – was it Eric?

Elliott Kalan

[5:16] Yeah, it probably was us and Eric Marsizak, friend of the show.

Stuart Wellington

[5:19] For listeners at home who aren't familiar and don't want to Google it, a FBI agent takes a plane full of deadly venomous snakes deliberately released to kill a witness being flown from Honolulu to Los Angeles to testify against –

[5:33] too much information.

[5:34] Oh, a mob boss.

[5:36] Sorry, the description – I thought the description was super long.

[5:40] Oh, okay.

[5:40] I was incorrect.

[5:41] No, but it was only two – it was only three words longer.

[5:43] Do you guys need to know the stars?

Dan McCoy

[5:46] I think I could list a lot of the stars.

[5:49] Yeah.

[5:49] You got, of course, Sam Jackson, Julianna Margulies.

[5:52] Yep.

[5:53] Kenan Thompson is in that.

[5:55] A lot of CGI snakes.

[5:56] Uh-huh.

[5:58] There's that anonymous actor who –

Stuart Wellington

[6:00] Lynn Shay is in that.

Elliott Kalan

[6:02] There's the actor whose name I don't remember who has the immortal line, get off my dick.

[6:06] Uh-huh.

[6:07] Do a snake that's bitten him in the penis.

Stuart Wellington

[6:09] I feel like you're doing the line a disservice by not putting any effort into the delivery.

[6:13] Well, I'm not an actor.

[6:14] He put a lot of delivery.

Dan McCoy

[6:15] Is J. Ma Mays in that or is it just an actress who looks kind of like J. Ma Mays?

Stuart Wellington

[6:18] I think you – it might be someone who just is like a look.

[6:24] Okay.

[6:24] So –

[6:24] Is Jake the snake in it?

[6:26] Bobby Cannavale.

[6:26] Oh, he plays a snake?

Dan McCoy

[6:29] The man who saved Richard Cain's life.

Stuart Wellington

[6:31] Oh, and David Teckner.

[6:32] Yeah.

[6:33] Okay.

[6:33] So, Elliot, since Dan got the last one, why don't you give a shot on this one?

[6:38] What do you think?

[6:39] I'm going to say 7.5.

Dan McCoy

[6:43] I'm going to say that the IMDb general public does not have the love of camp that you and I did when we enjoyed Snakes on the Plane and had a good time.

Stuart Wellington

[6:54] 5.5.

[6:56] Dan is fucking good at this shit.

[6:57] Dan, you're so good.

[6:59] Speaking of, Dan, you're so good at this.

[7:00] Why don't we learn a little bit about you, Dan?

[7:02] It says you're from Illinois.

[7:04] What's that all about?

Dan McCoy

[7:05] See, this is why.

[7:06] I'm from the heartland.

[7:08] I'm the man of the people.

[7:09] It's hard for me to judge these scores.

Elliott Kalan

[7:13] But, Dan, you're from the real America, Illinois.

Dan McCoy

[7:17] I went to college at Earlham College.

[7:19] Oh, Earlham College.

[7:19] Interesting.

[7:20] Where I met Stuart Wellington of the Flophouse.

[7:23] Very interesting.

[7:25] Yeah, I'm just glad to be here.

Stuart Wellington

[7:27] We're glad to have you.

[7:28] Now, let's move on.

[7:32] Our next movie is…

[7:34] Elliot.

[7:34] Not as interesting.

[7:36] No one needs to know about him.

Dan McCoy

[7:37] I'm assuming that you'll get your own spotlight later in the show.

[7:40] Thank goodness.

[7:40] If only.

[7:41] If only.

[7:41] My chance at stardom.

Stuart Wellington

[7:43] 2004's Soul Plane.

[7:45] Ugh.

Elliott Kalan

[7:46] It's a comedy?

[7:47] So, this is that there's only one plane?

[7:48] A soul plane?

[7:50] Mm-hmm.

[7:50] S-O-L-E?

Stuart Wellington

[7:51] Nope.

[7:51] It's a S-O-U-L plane.

[7:54] Oh.

[7:54] Things get raucously funny.

[7:56] Mm-hmm.

[7:57] Aboard the maiden flight of a black-owned airline,

[8:00] thanks to some last-minute passenger additions.

[8:05] Snakes?

[8:06] I don't believe so.

[8:08] Do we need to know…

[8:09] Do you need to know any of the stars?

[8:11] Because one of them is Snoop Dogg.

[8:14] Oh.

[8:14] Tom Arnold.

[8:16] So, there's a dog on the plane.

[8:17] Right.

[8:17] Even though there's a dog on the plane.

[8:17] Right.

Dan McCoy

[8:17] I do remember that Tom Arnold was in Soul Plane.

Stuart Wellington

[8:21] Method Man.

[8:23] Godfrey.

[8:24] Wow.

[8:26] Yeah.

[8:27] Pretty big cast.

[8:29] All the stars.

Dan McCoy

[8:31] Wait.

[8:31] Who goes first?

[8:32] It's your turn, Dan.

[8:33] Okay.

[8:34] I'm going to guess that this is a movie that, you know,

[8:39] critics scoffed at but has, at this point, a cult following.

[8:43] Mm-hmm.

[8:43] And I'm going to go with a 5.8.

Elliott Kalan

[8:46] 5.8.

[8:47] Okay.

[8:47] Elliot.

[8:48] I'm going to go lower than that.

[8:51] I'm going to say it's a 4.

Stuart Wellington

[8:53] Elliot gets it.

[8:54] 4.5.

[8:56] Damn.

[8:56] I feel you were being a little charitable.

[8:58] Now, Elliot, you were the harsher one.

[8:59] Is that because you come from New Jersey, America?

Elliott Kalan

[9:03] I'm from New Jersey where we're very highly critical of everything.

[9:07] We don't even want to remember stuff.

[9:09] Forget about it, we say.

[9:10] It's not worth sticking in your memory and keeping in your brain.

Dan McCoy

[9:14] Yeah.

[9:14] Throw it in your metal trash can.

[9:17] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[9:18] Now, guys, we're about to do the last movie of the round.

[9:21] This is a Flophouse fave.

[9:23] Money Plane from 2020.

[9:26] Oh, starring Kelsey Grammer as The Rumble.

[9:28] Yep.

[9:30] Starring a professional thief with $40 million in debt and his family's life on the line to

[9:36] must commit one final heist.

[9:39] Rob a futuristic airborne casino filled with the world's most dangerous criminals.

Elliott Kalan

[9:48] By futuristic, they mean it has one bed on it.

[9:50] Yeah.

[9:52] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[9:53] Ooh, yeah.

[9:55] So, Elliot, you just got the last one.

[9:57] Why don't we hear from you in this?

Elliott Kalan

[9:59] Ugh.

[10:00] Money Plane.

[10:00] I'm going to say that that is...

[10:04] I don't want to sound...

[10:05] I'm also going to give this one a 4.8.

[10:09] I know I'm still sticking in the same territory, but it is a movie that is...

Stuart Wellington

[10:12] Is that more?

[10:12] Did you just give it a higher rating than the last movie?

Elliott Kalan

[10:15] Than Soul Plane?

[10:16] Yeah.

[10:16] Only because Soul Plane was up at 4.5.

[10:19] This one, I'll tell you that it's not very good.

[10:22] It is hilarious.

[10:24] But I think it's got probably more action in it than Soul Plane.

[10:27] And I think IMDb users, they like to reward action, I feel like.

[10:32] Yeah.

[10:32] Maybe I'm wrong.

[10:33] Dan knows them better than me, again.

[10:34] Dan is like...

[10:35] I know he's more of a letterboxed guy, and he is very religious about reviewing every movie

[10:41] he sees on letterboxed, giving it straight-through reviews.

[10:42] It's true.

Stuart Wellington

[10:43] Wow, the way Elliot says that sounds like a burn.

[10:46] Sometimes it's...

[10:47] It's not a burn.

Stuart Wellington

[10:47] It's really...

Elliott Kalan

[10:48] I admire that Dan has the stick-to-ness.

[10:50] I joined letterboxed and found I did not care enough to tell people what I thought about

[10:53] movies in that format.

[10:55] You know...

[10:55] I admire that Dan does.

Stuart Wellington

[10:56] I feel like you should consider it an opportunity to not have to answer your children's demands.

Elliott Kalan

[11:04] That's not how children work.

[11:05] I can't say to them, hey, hold on a second, I'm writing a review of this movie.

[11:09] I'm blogging what I saw.

[11:11] Yeah, I'm writing a review of The Murder of Mr. Devil, a Czech film from the 60s on letterboxed.

[11:16] Hold on.

[11:17] And they'll go, oh, of course, daddy.

[11:18] This is more important than me demanding a snack.

Dan McCoy

[11:20] You don't have...

[11:20] You could just...

[11:21] You could just star rate them.

[11:23] You don't have to write anything.

[11:24] I would love to see what you're watching by being able to subscribe to your...

[11:28] Yeah, you don't have to write like a witty review if you don't need to.

Elliott Kalan

[11:31] You know what?

[11:32] Maybe I'll spend some time in the next couple days updating it with the things I've watched

[11:35] since the last time I started rating things.

Stuart Wellington

[11:37] Man, personal growth here.

[11:38] Yeah, I wanted to say...

[11:39] So, Dan, what are we dropping on this?

[11:40] Well, no.

Dan McCoy

[11:41] With regard to me writing letterboxed reviews...

Elliott Kalan

[11:44] And you write them very well.

[11:45] They're very good reviews.

Dan McCoy

[11:46] Thank you.

[11:48] But I also, if I have something to say, I made this rule for myself.

[11:52] I will write something about all of them.

[11:54] If I have something to say, that will turn into an actual review.

[11:58] Occasionally, if I don't feel like I'm going to add anything to the discourse or I'm tired,

[12:05] it'll just be a one-line joke.

[12:06] So, it was very freeing when I thought to myself, like, well, I will write something for

[12:10] everything, but it won't necessarily be insightful all the time.

[12:15] But thank you for...

[12:17] If there are any listeners, follow me.

[12:20] On Letterboxd, not in your name.

[12:22] Don't follow me around.

Stuart Wellington

[12:24] You will be bored.

[12:25] Your username is VampireLover69, right?

Dan McCoy

[12:30] Yeah.

[12:30] I mean, if you try and follow me, yeah.

[12:32] What would you get?

[12:34] A lot of standing outside the house, which I rarely leave.

[12:38] Yeah.

[12:38] And either me going to yoga, a movie, or a picket line.

Stuart Wellington

[12:43] Those are the things.

[12:44] And if you're a stranger, Dan will be very concerned that you're approaching him.

[12:49] Until you tell him you like the show, then he'll love you.

Dan McCoy

[12:52] No, it's true.

[12:53] I don't think I told this on the show, but someone approached me in Union Square, and

[12:59] they had a city bike, and like, because, you know...

Stuart Wellington

[13:01] This was when you were riding, because he didn't get a PS5?

[13:05] That's a topical reference.

[13:06] I don't know what that joke is.

[13:07] Yeah, that's a story I missed.

Dan McCoy

[13:09] I'm on the other side of the country.

[13:09] No, it was after a picket, and I was going to the subway, and they had a city bike and

[13:16] a bag of pretzels, and they, like, drifted towards me, and I'm like, why is this cyclist,

[13:21] you know, like, crowding me?

[13:23] And then they said, Dan McCoy, I think you're great.

[13:26] And I'm like, oh, okay, like, my affects, you know, as long as you're there to just say

[13:29] one nice thing, and then right on.

[13:32] Yep, enjoy your pretzels somewhere else.

Stuart Wellington

[13:34] Dan closes the box cutter he keeps in his pocket.

Elliott Kalan

[13:38] Well, yeah, he'd already put his keys between his knuckles, just in case.

Dan McCoy

[13:42] I want to make it clear.

[13:43] It's nothing that you're doing as the public.

[13:45] It is me as a human who doesn't know how to relate to people I haven't logged a lot of

[13:51] time with already.

Stuart Wellington

[13:52] The coolest thing is when he puts those keys between his knuckles, he says, snick it.

Dan McCoy

[14:00] Okay, well, sorry, money plane.

[14:03] Yeah, money plane.

[14:03] What do you think the radio is?

[14:04] What I'm thinking on this is, I'm glad Elliot brought up my letterbacks, letter, letterbacks,

[14:09] letterbox.

Elliott Kalan

[14:10] I want my letterbacks, letterbacks, letterbacks.

[14:12] I want my letterbacks.

Dan McCoy

[14:14] Dan mispronounces words.

[14:16] I don't know that the rest of the world is what I am, which is an ironist who will rate

[14:23] things according to my own personal enjoyment of them, eschewing the idea of objective ratings

[14:32] of art and just talking about how I felt.

Stuart Wellington

[14:35] Yeah, some people are Virgos.

Dan McCoy

[14:36] Yeah.

[14:38] So I think although money plane gives great pleasure to the viewer, I'm going to say that

[14:46] the average viewer would rate it a four.

Stuart Wellington

[14:50] The rating is 3.2.

[14:54] Dan gets the point.

[14:55] Uh-oh.

[14:56] Dan, you are blowing me out of the water with this game.

[14:58] It is Dan, three, Elliot, one.

[15:02] Are you guys ready for the next startling category?

[15:06] How startling is it?

[15:08] I might not be ready.

Elliott Kalan

[15:08] I don't know if I could ever be ready for that.

[15:09] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[15:10] Yeah.

[15:10] The next category is extra cheese.

[15:16] Oh, you idiots.

[15:19] I can't believe you fell for it.

[15:21] What?

[15:21] You thought we were playing the Flophouse motion picture puzzle palace, but in fact, we

[15:26] are playing the Flophouse motion picture pizza parlor, where all the categories are pizza

[15:32] related.

[15:33] So, but we weren't playing it before.

[15:35] I did fall for it.

Elliott Kalan

[15:36] Oh, God.

[15:36] You just told me a thing, but I took you at your word.

[15:40] I do feel like a real fool.

[15:42] Yeah.

[15:42] Okay.

[15:43] Why did I believe you?

Stuart Wellington

[15:44] Okay.

[15:45] Well, now here the scores are da-da-da-doubled.

[15:49] Uh-oh.

[15:50] Okay.

[15:51] So it's extra cheese.

[15:53] That's why the scores are doubled.

[15:54] Mm-hmm.

[15:54] Scores are doubled.

[15:56] So, the first movie in this category.

Elliott Kalan

[15:58] That was startling.

[15:59] I don't know if I'm ever going to get over the shame and the shock of misunderstanding what

[16:02] game we were playing.

Stuart Wellington

[16:04] The first movie in this category in the extra cheese category is E.T. the Extra Terrestrial.

[16:12] Because they eat pizza in one part?

[16:15] No.

[16:15] Extra.

[16:17] Extra cheese.

[16:18] Extra Terrestrial.

Dan McCoy

[16:20] Keep up.

[16:20] I thought it was going to be pizza themed.

[16:22] I thought so, too.

Elliott Kalan

[16:23] I mean, maybe I'm misremembering it.

[16:25] I thought it was explicitly said that was the case.

Dan McCoy

[16:27] That's confusing.

[16:29] Okay.

[16:30] So, okay.

[16:31] Wait.

[16:31] Whose turn is it?

Stuart Wellington

[16:33] Well, let me explain E.T. the Extra Terrestrial.

[16:36] Yeah, we got to figure out what kind of movie this is.

[16:38] In case we haven't heard of it.

[16:39] Yep.

[16:39] A troubled child summons the courage to help a friendly alien escape from Earth and return

[16:45] to his home planet.

[16:47] Okay.

[16:48] Do you guys need to know the director?

Dan McCoy

[16:52] I think that that's Mr. Steven Spielberg.

Stuart Wellington

[16:54] Yep.

[16:54] Okay.

[16:55] You don't get extra credit, but good pull, Dan.

[16:58] You guys have seen this one, right?

[17:00] Deep cut, Dan.

[17:01] Deep cut.

Dan McCoy

[17:01] No, I'm familiar with this movie.

[17:03] Cool.

[17:04] It traumatized me as a child, and I've enjoyed it as an adult.

Elliott Kalan

[17:08] I always like it when ads will mention, they'll reset, they'll advertise an old movie by

[17:14] mentioning the newest movie a director made.

[17:16] Do you think there's ever an ad for E.T. on DVD that said, from the director of Terminal?

Dan McCoy

[17:21] I hope so.

[17:24] You know, Audrey has never seen E.T., but she saw a clip of it at a pre-show at a movie

[17:30] that we watched.

[17:31] Sure.

[17:32] And I was like, oh, you know, I've given up on trying to be like, oh, you should see this

[17:37] movie because, number one, she ignores it, and number two, I don't want to be too much

[17:42] of a guy.

[17:43] Yeah, there's no winners.

[17:43] Like a guy.

[17:44] In that one, yeah.

[17:45] But, I mean, all I will say is, I think you will like that one, and then pass along.

[17:50] But other people were like really trying to push E.T. on her when they couldn't find

[17:53] it.

[17:53] And she's like, it's too sad.

[17:55] It looks too sad.

[17:56] And like, she had seen the scene like after E.T. recovers, but is still sick.

[18:03] And I'm like, oh, you didn't even see the saddest part.

[18:06] But we were all trying to convince her.

[18:07] Like, it is happily.

[18:08] You know, just because a sad thing happens in a movie, you can still, anyway.

[18:13] Sorry.

[18:13] Spoilers for E.T., a movie.

[18:14] It's part of the human experience.

[18:16] Being sad, being happy.

[18:17] Yeah, exactly.

[18:17] Or the alien experience.

Stuart Wellington

[18:18] There's no happy without sad.

[18:19] It's the great wheel.

[18:20] Yeah.

[18:20] Yeah, yeah.

[18:21] Two sides of the same coin.

[18:23] Sad goes, we're not so different, you and I.

[18:26] Two sides of the same coin.

[18:28] Join me.

[18:29] You're right.

[18:30] We are alike.

[18:31] Because Dan is in the lead, he is going to have to shoot his shot first.

Dan McCoy

[18:37] Well, this was, for a very long time, the highest grossing movie ever.

[18:43] So, it must have connected with people.

[18:45] I'm going to say.

Elliott Kalan

[18:46] Until the Zack Snyder, JLA Justice League cut came out, right?

[18:50] Mm-hmm.

Dan McCoy

[18:51] I'm going to say, just because there are a few spoil sports out there who, you know, are grumps, 8.7.

Elliott Kalan

[18:57] Elliot?

[18:57] I'm going to give it a perfect nine.

Stuart Wellington

[19:00] Guys, 7.9.

[19:03] Wow.

[19:04] That's objectively stupid.

[19:05] That's an objectively stupid score for E.T.

[19:09] But that's a damn point.

[19:11] That's a dumb score.

[19:12] It is a bad score, yeah.

[19:14] I think we can all agree.

[19:15] So, in the extra cheese category, the next movie is...

[19:19] Swiss Army Man.

[19:22] Okay.

[19:23] Okay.

[19:23] Yeah, this is Swiss.

[19:24] Getting closer to cheese.

[19:26] Army Man.

[19:28] A hopeless man stranded on a deserted island befriends a dead body.

[19:32] And together, they go on a surreal journey to get home.

[19:37] From Oscar winners, the Daniels.

[19:39] Mm-hmm.

[19:40] Do you need any more information?

[19:42] Are you guys familiar with this movie?

Elliott Kalan

[19:44] I can tell.

[19:44] It's, what, Paul Dano and Daniel Radcliffe, right?

[19:48] Mm-hmm.

[19:48] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[19:48] I never saw it at the time because the idea of a farting corpse movie didn't appeal to me.

[19:55] There's not that much farting in it.

[19:57] There's less than you would think.

[19:58] Okay.

[19:58] I mean, now that I liked Everything Everywhere All at Once, I'm curious to go back.

[20:02] Have you seen it?

Elliott Kalan

[20:03] Yes.

[20:04] Swiss Army Man I had seen before Everything Everywhere All at Once.

[20:06] And it feels like Swiss Army Man is, they have all the ingenuity and inventiveness of Everything Everywhere All at Once without a real story or a thing to say.

[20:16] So it feels like young artists experimenting with technique before they hit on meaning.

[20:22] And they come to a fruition, a culmination with Everything Everywhere All at Once.

[20:25] But there's good stuff in it.

[20:26] It's a fun movie.

Stuart Wellington

[20:28] And that's the kind of thing where, like, because there's, like, a youthful exuberance to it or inventiveness, a viewer might attach meaning to it and like it quite a bit.

Elliott Kalan

[20:39] Yeah, yeah.

[20:39] I think so.

[20:40] I mean, at times it gets a little chewy, you know, in that kind of – the only way I can really describe it is in that kind of, like, indie luminaires type quality feeling, you know, where something is reaching for emotion but is failing.

[20:59] But it's –

Stuart Wellington

[20:59] So, like, the sort of thing where you're like, why would we wear belts when we can just wear rope instead?

[21:06] I guess.

[21:07] Something like that.

Dan McCoy

[21:09] Technology never got better than the good old-fashioned rope.

[21:12] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[21:12] It's the kind of movie where there's scenes of, like, people on deserted island using the stuff around them to, like, recreate modern life experiences in low-tech ways.

[21:20] But there's good stuff in it.

[21:21] It's a good movie.

[21:22] It's just, like, it's not what Everything Everywhere All at Once is.

[21:24] But that's Swiss Army, man.

[21:26] I give it.

[21:27] Yeah.

[21:27] Do you want to shoot your shot, Elliot?

[21:29] Oh, it's so hard because for IMDb, it could – IMDb swings wildly between Dan, middle-of-the-road, all-American, you know, mainstream corn.

[21:40] Uh-huh.

[21:41] And also, it swings wildly between that and people who think they are real, like, cine-ass elites and want to show off what they've watched and things like that.

[21:50] Not as much as Letterboxd.

[21:52] But – shots fired.

[21:55] Bang, bang.

[21:56] But I feel like you never can be quite sure.

[21:59] But I'm going to say 4.9 from IMDb.

[22:05] I think it's a better movie than that.

[22:07] But I'm going to say that IMDb gives it a 4.9.

[22:09] Dan.

[22:10] Dan.

Dan McCoy

[22:11] I'm going to give it a 5.3.

Stuart Wellington

[22:16] 6.9.

[22:17] Wow.

[22:18] Oh, wow.

[22:18] Higher than I would have expected.

[22:19] That is only a full point away from E.T., the extraterrestrial.

Elliott Kalan

[22:23] Which is, again – Swiss Army Man is not a bad movie, but it's not one point less than E.T.

[22:29] E.T. should be far higher than that.

[22:30] But here's the thing.

[22:31] We're also – I keep forgetting.

[22:33] It's a self-selecting audience who's going to see and then rate Swiss Army Man.

[22:38] You know.

Dan McCoy

[22:39] Although you always do get, like, a surprisingly large contingent of people who have just seemed to have stumbled over a thing and watched it and been entirely disgusted by it.

[22:51] Which is, like, I understand that this is, like, a normal way to interact with art.

[22:57] But it is so foreign to me to, like, the idea of, like, well, I know absolutely nothing about this movie.

[23:04] And I'm going to stick with it all the way through if I don't like it.

Elliott Kalan

[23:07] And I'm going to watch the whole – Dan, a lot of people have a lot of time to kill in their lives.

[23:11] Yeah.

[23:12] Okay.

[23:12] And for a lot of people, it's hard to stop watching a movie.

[23:15] It's hard – once they start – once they pop, they can't stop.

[23:17] Mm-hmm.

[23:19] That's great.

Stuart Wellington

[23:20] Yeah.

[23:21] That's the great thing about movies.

[23:22] Speechless.

[23:23] Once they pop culture, they can't stop culture.

[23:25] Yeah.

[23:25] Oh, yeah.

[23:26] So, our next movie in the category of Cheese, Extra Cheese, is a movie from South Korea.

[23:35] Yeah.

[23:36] Titled Cheese in the Trap.

[23:38] Now, this is based on, I believe, a webtoon or a webcomic.

[23:42] There's also been a TV show of the same name and, I believe, plot.

[23:47] I'm assuming you're unfamiliar, so let me give a quick synopsis.

[23:49] I'm going to need to know the plot and cast, please.

[23:52] Hong Seoul is an ordinary university student.

[23:55] She is busy working part-time jobs to pay for her tuition fee and living expenses.

[24:01] Yu Joon is her senior at the same university.

[24:05] He seems perfect.

[24:06] He comes from a wealthy family.

[24:07] He has a kind attitude to others, and he is handsome.

[24:10] But Hong Seoul does not feel comfortable around Yu Joong.

[24:14] And suddenly, Yu Joong comes and talks to her.

[24:17] He wants to go out on a date.

Dan McCoy

[24:22] Oh, that's it.

[24:23] That's it.

[24:24] Okay.

[24:26] It's a real slice-of-life, slice-of-cheese movie.

[24:29] Am I up?

Stuart Wellington

[24:30] Yeah, Dan, you got to switch your shot first, buddy.

Dan McCoy

[24:32] I think that for the reasons that Elliot actually just mentioned about it being a self-selecting group that rates a lot of these things, this seems like it's part of kind of a family of stuff, like a franchise.

[24:51] So I'm going to say that the fans came and gave this a 7.4.

[24:58] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[24:59] Okay.

[24:59] I'm going to need to know some of the cast before I can make my accurate rating.

Stuart Wellington

[25:06] Min Soo Go.

[25:07] Okay.

[25:08] Park Hae Jin.

[25:09] Okay.

[25:10] Yu In Young.

[25:10] I'm crushing it.

[25:14] Dock Young Joe.

[25:16] Man, I'm crushing it.

Elliott Kalan

[25:18] Yeah, this information is less helpful than I thought it might be.

[25:22] Let's say, I think, so Dan, what do you say, a 7 point something?

[25:25] 4.

[25:26] 7.4.

[25:26] I'm going to go the opposite way.

[25:27] I'm going to say the fans came and they were so mad about how it wrecked with the source material that they gave it a 2.

[25:32] 2.2.

Stuart Wellington

[25:33] Oh, man.

[25:34] Now I have to do some fucking math.

Dan McCoy

[25:35] They're so mad.

[25:36] They're so furious about it.

[25:37] Okay.

[25:38] Well, it's somewhere in the middle.

Stuart Wellington

[25:40] It is in the middle.

[25:41] It is 5.7, which is closer to Dan.

[25:45] Oh.

[25:45] Okay.

[25:46] I'm guessing the fans were balanced out by the fans who hated this adaptation.

[25:50] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[25:51] Okay.

[25:52] So, man, Dan.

[25:53] What's interesting about this game is that you don't get penalized for going over.

[25:56] As you're doing some other games.

[25:58] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[25:58] Well, that's to prevent that, you know, the gamesmanship.

Dan McCoy

[26:03] I don't like it.

[26:04] I don't like it.

[26:04] I never liked that rule.

[26:06] I think it should just be whoever's closest.

[26:08] Whoever's closest.

Stuart Wellington

[26:09] Wise words from the guy winning the game.

Dan McCoy

[26:14] It's a long-standing conviction that just happens to come into play.

[26:18] This happens to be helping you quite a bit.

Stuart Wellington

[26:20] This is the last movie.

[26:21] Dan's always loved the electoral college.

Elliott Kalan

[26:23] Just because he's lost the popular vote in every election and yet somehow remains president of the Flop House.

[26:29] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[26:30] Look, our founding fathers made it that way for a reason, Elliot.

[26:34] I want to make it clear.

[26:36] I don't like the electoral college, actually.

[26:37] I don't know.

Stuart Wellington

[26:38] He's winking at me when he says he doesn't like the electoral college.

[26:40] Do the strict popular vote in this country.

[26:43] And he's staring at his poster of Donald Trump.

[26:46] You know?

[26:47] And kissing him.

[26:48] Not existing.

[26:49] Uh-huh.

[26:49] He has, what, it's an original Ben Garrison cartoon?

Dan McCoy

[26:53] Did you have friends?

[26:54] That guy is a nut.

[26:59] I understand.

[27:01] Yeah, I know.

[27:01] It's hilarious.

[27:02] I mean, I don't understand.

[27:02] I get how they're like, they have people with different political views than me, you know,

[27:07] writing these like highly conservative, but his cartoons.

Stuart Wellington

[27:12] Elliot's quickly Googling.

[27:13] With a buff Donald Trump.

[27:16] Oh, yeah.

[27:16] I know those ones.

Elliott Kalan

[27:18] Ugh.

[27:19] Okay.

[27:19] The last movie.

[27:20] I love anyone who does cartoons where the cartoons don't have a joke, but it's just like,

[27:26] it's just a metaphor for how cool he thinks something is.

[27:29] Yeah.

[27:30] Yeah.

[27:30] He's up there with, I forget the name of the artist who does those paintings of all

[27:34] the founding fathers crying as Barack Obama stops on a flag.

[27:38] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[27:41] Okay.

[27:42] So the final movie in the category of extra cheese is titled Mozzarella Stories from 2011.

Elliott Kalan

[27:50] So this is a, wait, oh, this is a movie.

[27:52] Okay.

[27:52] I thought this was another category in extra cheese for a moment.

[27:55] No.

Stuart Wellington

[27:56] Yeah.

[27:56] It's a subcategory.

[27:58] Oh, man.

[27:59] I should have had subcategories.

[28:01] Chiccio D.O.P., the king of mozzarella in the south of Italy, is provoking a number

[28:07] of events as he sees his empire threatened by the Chinese producers.

[28:13] That's just good summarizing.

[28:14] Oh, he's provoking a number of events.

[28:15] A number of events.

[28:18] I can see it now.

Elliott Kalan

[28:20] Painted a real picture in my brain.

[28:23] Well, in Robert McKee's story, he says the protagonists should be active and always be provoking events.

[28:28] A number of them, if possible.

Stuart Wellington

[28:32] Our biggest name in this one is Ada Turturro.

[28:37] Okay.

[28:38] She plays Autilia.

Dan McCoy

[28:41] Yeah.

[28:41] This sounds to me like something that, you know, did well at Sundance and then disappeared.

Stuart Wellington

[28:44] Which, by the way, guys, I got to say, at some point, we're going to be, you know, the AMPTP is going to offer a fair deal and stop being fucking assholes.

[28:55] Eventually, they're just going to have to realize it.

[28:57] We're going to start watching current movies again.

[29:01] And, oh, the jealousy I had when flying back from Greece and watching multiple people watching Mafia Mama on their fucking, on their little screens.

[29:10] And I'm like, shielding my eyes.

Dan McCoy

[29:12] I promise you, as a celebration for reaching that agreement, we can do that the very first.

Elliott Kalan

[29:17] What a fitting way to celebrate the return to work of an industry.

Dan McCoy

[29:21] I do want to say, though, that people have really been enjoying the flashback episodes.

[29:28] And I've been enjoying doing them because we get to choose things that are interesting rather than just being stuck with whatever comes up.

[29:36] So I do think that we should figure out some way of folding that in going forward.

[29:40] Yeah, I think so.

Elliott Kalan

[29:40] We can mix it up.

[29:41] We don't have to stick one or the other.

[29:43] Yeah.

[29:43] I mean, we'll always, we'll still see Mafia Mama.

[29:45] I've been hearing a lot.

Stuart Wellington

[29:46] Ten weeks of Mafia Mama is what Elliot declares.

Elliott Kalan

[29:50] I've got a lot of people, I've had a lot of people tell me that they want to hear our take on the flash at some point also.

[29:55] And I say, Ricky and the Flash, Meryl Streep's greatest film.

[29:58] And they go, no, no, no, the other one, the Flash.

[30:00] It's on Max right now.

[30:01] And I'm telling you.

[30:02] Ricky and the Flash is on Max?

Dan McCoy

[30:04] Well, it might be.

[30:05] I don't know.

[30:05] But the Flash is on Max.

[30:07] And I'm like, with what Zasloff has done to this, like the one thing I actually kind of want to watch on here out of like morbid curiosity is the Flash.

[30:16] But I know that we're going to have to watch it for the show eventually.

[30:19] So I'm not going to.

Stuart Wellington

[30:20] Okay.

[30:21] Mozzarella stories, guys.

[30:22] Give me a rating.

[30:23] Dan, shoot your shot.

[30:24] You're still in the lead.

[30:25] And then it's a chance to snipe you.

Dan McCoy

[30:26] 3.4 for mozzarella stories.

Stuart Wellington

[30:28] 3.4.

[30:28] Okay.

Elliott Kalan

[30:29] Not a fan, says Dan.

[30:31] I'm going to say only the people in, only family members of the filmmakers have reviewed it.

[30:38] So I'm going to say 8.5.

[30:39] Better than ET.

Dan McCoy

[30:43] What was your?

[30:45] I think I said 3.4.

Stuart Wellington

[30:48] Okay.

[30:49] And you said 8.5.

[30:51] 8.5.

[30:52] I believe it goes to Dan with 5.7 unless I fucked up my math.

[30:58] Oh, man.

[30:58] Another big category for Dan McCoy.

Elliott Kalan

[31:00] Wow.

[31:00] No, I think that is narrowly Dan's.

[31:02] Yeah.

[31:02] It's what?

[31:02] 2.8 away from me and 2 point.

[31:05] What was yours, Dan?

[31:05] 3.4?

Stuart Wellington

[31:07] Yeah.

[31:08] Now, I think this has been a really fun game so far, guys.

[31:12] But why don't we get to, why don't we hear a word from our sponsors?

[31:15] And then we'll get back to the game.

Elliott Kalan

[31:18] What could be fairer than me throwing out random numbers and losing almost every time?

[31:22] What could be more fun than that?

[31:23] Yeah, let's do some ads.

Stuart Wellington

[31:25] I mean, L.A. could be relying on his background as a cultured cineast.

Dan McCoy

[31:31] In the knowledge that you, yeah, that this is largely a luck game.

[31:38] Maybe the next category is more for you.

Elliott Kalan

[31:40] I don't have my finger on the pulse of the cinema world as I once believed I did.

[31:45] Hey, you know what?

Dan McCoy

[31:48] You know what, guys?

[31:49] Hold on.

[31:49] I'm trying to.

[31:53] Mon podcast, vous plaît?

[31:57] That's do you like my podcast?

Elliott Kalan

[31:59] Dan, how did you gain such fluency in obviously a foreign language to you?

Dan McCoy

[32:03] Well, you know what?

[32:04] I took five years of French in school.

Stuart Wellington

[32:07] I think it's five years.

[32:10] That is less impressive.

Dan McCoy

[32:12] Mon podcast, vous plaît?

[32:15] Audrey will ask me what a French song is saying.

[32:17] I'm like, I can tell you what every fifth word is.

[32:20] That might help.

[32:22] So, obviously, I could use Babbel.

[32:25] This summer, you can start speaking a new language with Babbel.

[32:30] Babbel's quick 10-minute lessons are designed by over 150 language experts to help you start speaking a new language in as little as three weeks.

[32:41] Developed by over 150 expert linguists, Babbel gives you unlimited access to hundreds of award-winning lessons designed for all learners based on level and time commitment.

[32:52] If you don't want to be like me, Dan McCoy, a man who, again, took five years of French, spent a few weeks in France in high school, but has lost most of his language acuity, you can keep it up.

[33:07] You can keep it up.

[33:08] You can learn it anew.

[33:10] You can learn it for the first time with Babbel.

[33:13] Here's a special limited-time deal for our listeners to get you started right now.

[33:16] Get 55% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners at Babbel.com slash flop.

[33:23] Get 55% off at Babbel.com slash flop.

[33:27] Spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash flop.

[33:31] Rules and restrictions may apply.

Elliott Kalan

[33:34] Hey, we've got another sponsor today, and I'll just start with a little bit of personal revelation.

[33:39] Regular Flophouse listeners will know where I stand on the subject of cooking.

[33:43] I hate it.

[33:43] It sucks.

[33:44] Cooking is difficult.

[33:46] It doesn't turn out right half the time.

[33:48] Worst of all, it takes too much time.

[33:49] Time!

[33:50] The one thing I have the least of in this world.

[33:52] The only resource that I can only lose, I can never regain.

[33:55] If you're like me, you're looking for wholesome, convenient meals for jam-packed days,

[34:00] why not save time and eat well and stay on track with your healthy lifestyle that you're trying to create.

[34:05] I'm definitely trying to be more healthy, but it's not happening.

[34:07] But maybe it will as I rely more on Factor, America's number one ready-to-eat meal kit.

[34:12] With Factor, you can skip the trips to the grocery store.

[34:14] Just don't even go.

[34:15] Skip the chopping, the prepping.

[34:17] Skip most of the cleaning up too while you still get the flavor and nutritional quality you need.

[34:22] The meals are fresh.

[34:23] They are never frozen.

[34:24] They're ready to go in just two minutes.

[34:25] You just pop them in the microwave.

[34:27] Heat them up.

[34:28] Just enjoy them.

[34:29] And then you get back to, as they say in the talking points, crushing your goals.

[34:33] That's not the way I would put it.

[34:34] In my way, you go back to the endless treadmill that is life where you can never really catch up or get ahead.

[34:39] Refresh your healthy habits without missing a beat.

[34:41] You can choose from 34 plus, more than 34 weekly flavor-packed, dietician-approved meals.

[34:47] Again, they're already eaten two minutes.

[34:48] There's also the Gourmet Plus option, prepared to perfection by chefs and ready-to-eat in record time.

[34:53] Treat yourself to upscale meals with premium ingredients like broccolini, leeks, truffle butter, and asparagus.

[35:00] Those are all premium ingredients, and I'm a big fan of those.

[35:03] Leeks, I love asparagus.

[35:04] I love truffle butter.

[35:05] It tastes great.

Stuart Wellington

[35:07] Look.

[35:07] I really like the way it makes his pee smell.

Elliott Kalan

[35:09] That is part.

[35:10] I mean, I like to know that I'm peeing.

[35:11] Like truffles.

[35:11] I like to be able to smell it.

[35:12] Yeah, sure.

[35:14] I'm never on the World War I front lines where I need to worry about my peace, giving away my location to the enemy.

[35:19] I like to pee in a toilet and have people know, hey, someone's been here.

[35:24] Yeah, yeah, I get it.

[35:25] Speaking of the food and not the pee, so Factor sent us a selection of their meals.

[35:29] Everything arrived super well-packed, cold.

[35:31] It felt fresh.

[35:32] It was not frozen.

[35:33] It was still cold and fresh and ready to cook.

[35:35] The first one I had to go with, of course, was the chipotle pork chop.

[35:38] It was really good.

[35:39] It was spicy.

[35:40] And everything tasted really fresh and like it had been prepared by me just then for a moment.

[35:47] But it was actually prepared by someone much better than me, a professional who knows how to cook because I don't know how to and I don't like to.

[35:54] So the idea of getting fresh cooked food that I can eat whenever I want at any time, it's a dream.

[36:00] So that's Factor.

[36:01] Head to factormeals.com slash flop50 and use the code flop50 to get 50% off.

[36:07] That's code flop50 at factormeals.com slash flop50 to get 50% off of your meals.

[36:16] Stop cooking.

[36:17] Start eating.

[36:18] Factor.

[36:19] How do you like that slogan?

[36:20] I made it up.

[36:21] That's good.

Stuart Wellington

[36:21] So we also have a jumbotron and it goes like this.

[36:29] This message is for Andrew and it's from Alan.

[36:33] Happy birthday to Sloan and Parker's dad, my favorite brother and the most dedicated Flophouse listener I know.

[36:41] I will forever treasure the memory of that time we spent an evening listening to Stuart getting increasingly upset about cars.

[36:49] You're the freaking best.

[36:51] Oh, remember the time.

[36:53] I do.

Elliott Kalan

[36:55] Yeah, I remember the time when we fell in love, girl.

[36:57] That was very sweet.

[36:59] Hey, guys, before we get back to the increasingly nonsensical and hard for me to understand game that we're playing.

[37:06] Sounds like a loser.

[37:07] I mean, if I was winning, I'd understand it.

[37:09] I have two things I want to tell you about.

[37:11] The first is you don't have to just listen to the Flophouse.

[37:14] You can watch the Flophouse with FlopTV, our monthly six-part series where we are going to be talking about

[37:21] some of the biggest and most requested Flop movies that there are.

[37:26] Finally, movies we have never talked about on the podcast before.

[37:29] FlopTV is a streamlined kind of one-hour version of the show.

[37:32] It's like watching a TV version of the Flophouse.

[37:34] Each episode has a presentation from one of us.

[37:36] We talk about a movie.

[37:37] We take questions from the viewers through the chat function.

[37:41] It's really great.

[37:42] Our first episode last month, Beastmaster 2 through the portal of time, was super fun.

[37:46] And you know what?

[37:47] You can still watch it because even if you miss an episode of FlopTV, we're going to leave the video recordings up on the website for the entirety of the run of the show.

[37:56] So if you miss an episode, you don't have to worry.

[37:59] You can still go back and watch it.

[38:00] All six episodes will be available by the end of the run.

[38:03] So we've got individual tickets but also season passes.

[38:06] That season pass is still worth getting because you can still watch the old episodes if you miss them.

[38:10] But our next episode is one week from the release of this Flophouse that you're listening to today.

[38:15] Our next episode.

[38:16] Dan, what movie are we watching?

[38:18] What sexy animated movie are we watching?

Dan McCoy

[38:20] We're watching Cool World, the movie that saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit.

[38:26] They're like, okay, let's take the Jessica Rabbit part.

[38:29] Let's put it in the middle.

[38:30] Let's make it creepy.

[38:31] And then let's have a bunch of weird things happening all over the screen to distract and annoy.

Elliott Kalan

[38:36] Yep, that's right.

[38:37] It's like they predicted the Star Wars Special Edition where they're like, what if a movie had a lot of crazy crap running around all over the margins of the frame,

[38:46] making it hard to pay attention to the movie?

[38:48] Let's just do that.

[38:49] So go to theflophouse.simpleticks.com to get tickets.

[38:53] It'll be super fun.

[38:54] I'm really looking forward to it.

[38:55] Dan is going to do the summary for Cool World, and he's a record perv.

[38:58] So you're going to – who knows where it's going to go.

Dan McCoy

[39:01] And I'm – you said it already.

[39:03] I'm just – I'm glad that we made the decision.

[39:06] There are reasons in the past where we're like, oh, we should have a viewing window on this thing.

[39:11] We have to cut it off at some point.

[39:13] Like in this case, we realize why are we punishing people who might want to see all of the shows?

[39:19] Like they can still like get a season pass and go back and watch from the beginning.

[39:24] And I've been gratified to see that when we announced that on social media – this is the first time we've announced it on the show.

[39:29] We announced it on social media.

[39:30] People were really excited about it.

Elliott Kalan

[39:32] So go to theflophouse.com and watch our Beastmaster 2 episode.

[39:37] It'll be up for a while.

[39:38] You can keep watching it.

[39:39] Cool World will be a week from today.

[39:40] That's September 9th at 6 p.m. Pacific, 9 p.m. Eastern.

[39:45] That Cool World, the episode, will be broadcasting live.

[39:48] If you can't make us for the live broadcast, then you can always watch the recording at any time that you want.

[39:53] We've got a lot of other great movies coming up once a month.

[39:55] It's going to be super fun through January.

[39:57] And hey, if you want to watch us and you also want to smell the air that's coming off of us and maybe kind of feel the electricity crackling off our skins from a distance.

Dan McCoy

[40:07] I didn't agree to anyone smelling my air.

Elliott Kalan

[40:09] We can't stop them if they're in the same room.

[40:11] We are going to be doing two live shows in one night on Thursday, October 19th at Vidiot's.

[40:17] So we're going to be really smelly.

[40:19] We're going to be very smelly by the end of that second show.

[40:20] By the late show.

[40:21] That's at Vidiot's in Los Angeles.

[40:23] This is our first Los Angeles show in a while.

[40:25] We're going to be doing, again, two shows in one night, two entirely different shows.

[40:29] In one night, the first show is going to be Speed 2 Cruise Control.

[40:33] The second show will be Three Men and a Baby.

[40:35] As Dan dubbed it, it is a night of numbers between one and four.

[40:40] Just go to vidiotsfoundation.org, and it will be on the calendar, October 19th, vidiotsfoundation.org.

[40:47] Vidiot's is a great new location in L.A.

[40:49] It's the new spot for a classic kind of legendary L.A. video store.

[40:55] But now it has a theater space.

[40:56] It's a really comfortable movie theater.

[40:58] It's really fun to be in.

[40:59] I'm really excited about it.

[41:00] So that's two shows in one night.

[41:01] If you're in the Los Angeles area, come join us.

[41:04] Vidiotsfoundation.org.

[41:05] And if you're not in the Los Angeles area, hey, watch us on TV.

[41:08] On your computer?

[41:10] Next week, September 9th, with Flop TV.

[41:12] That's theflophouse.com.

Dan McCoy

[41:13] I love you pretending like that's a weird thing.

Elliott Kalan

[41:19] This is the same thing that I use to make spreadsheets for work.

[41:22] I can watch TV on that.

[41:23] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[41:24] Wait, you're watching it on a computer?

[41:26] The thing that has disrupted our entire industry?

Stuart Wellington

[41:30] Yeah.

[41:31] Yeah, thanks for doing my computers.

[41:32] The thing that I go to fear.com for?

[41:36] Dee Snider's Strangeland?

Elliott Kalan

[41:38] It's the only place to get either of those things.

[41:40] Yeah.

S4

[41:45] The Greatest Generation.

[41:47] Maximum Fun's irreverent, filthy-mouthed Star Trek podcast is a big deal.

S5

[41:52] How big?

[41:53] It's the only Star Trek podcast big enough to have a live show tour.

[41:57] And we are inviting all Star Trek fans and Max Funsters everywhere.

S4

[42:02] We're calling it the Share Your Embarrassment Tour.

[42:05] We're going to celebrate and roast Star Trek V.

S5

[42:09] That's the one where they kill God.

[42:11] We're going to be in a bunch of cities, and GreatestGenTour.com has all the info.

[42:15] And ticket links.

S4

[42:17] That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing info for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour.

S5

[42:23] Come share your embarrassment with us.

S4

[42:25] And grow stronger from the sharing.

[42:29] Hi, I'm Travis McElroy.

S6

[42:31] And I'm Teresa McElroy.

Elliott Kalan

[42:32] And we're the hosts of Schmanners.

S6

[42:34] We don't believe that etiquette should be used to judge other people.

Elliott Kalan

[42:38] No, on Schmanners, we see etiquette as a way to navigate social situations with confidence.

S6

[42:44] So if that sounds like something you're into...

Dan McCoy

[42:46] Join us every Friday on Maximum Fun, wherever you get your podcasts.

Stuart Wellington

[42:53] Okay, welcome back.

[42:56] Of course, we are playing everyone's favorite game here at the Flophouse.

[42:59] It is the Flophouse Motion Picture Pizza Parlor.

[43:04] So it's still the pizza parlor.

[43:05] It's still the pizza parlor.

[43:06] Every category is about pizza stuff.

[43:10] Except the categories are just named about pizza stuff.

Elliott Kalan

[43:13] Like they're not necessarily pizza movies.

[43:15] Although the mozzarella one might have been.

Stuart Wellington

[43:16] Oh, wow.

[43:17] Elliot, you're being extra hater-y today.

[43:20] I'm just trying to keep track for myself of what this game is.

[43:22] Let's see if you can turn that shit around.

Elliott Kalan

[43:25] Okay.

[43:25] Sorry, it's all sour grapes.

[43:27] I'm just mad I'm losing.

Stuart Wellington

[43:28] Okay.

[43:29] So the next category is Meat Lovers.

[43:35] Meat Lovers.

[43:36] And the first movie in this category is Dan's favorite movie, The Midnight Meat Train.

[43:44] This is a horror movie from 2008.

[43:47] A photographer's obsessive pursuit of dark subject matter leads him into the path of a serial killer who stalks the late-night commuters, ultimately butchering them in the most gruesome ways.

Dan McCoy

[44:01] I have a very distinct memory of seeing the trailer to this also with Elliot and Eric, I think.

[44:07] I think we saw it maybe before Rambo, I'm guessing.

[44:10] Possibly.

[44:11] But Elliot saw the title of the Midnight Meat Train and leaned over to me and whispered, that's what I call my penis.

Stuart Wellington

[44:20] I forgot about that.

Dan McCoy

[44:22] Yeah.

[44:24] Midnight Meat Train.

Stuart Wellington

[44:26] We got stars here.

[44:27] Vinny Jones, Bradley Cooper, Leslie Bibb.

[44:30] Uh-oh, everybody buckle your BART belts because Roger BART is in it.

[44:37] Get on the BART train.

Dan McCoy

[44:41] Let's see.

[44:43] Wait, is it on me or?

[44:44] Mm-hmm.

[44:45] Oh, I'm going to say 6.1.

Elliott Kalan

[44:49] I'm going to give it a solid 7.

Stuart Wellington

[44:53] 6.0.

[44:55] Dan.

[44:55] Oh, Dan's so good.

Elliott Kalan

[44:57] He's so fucking good.

[44:59] He's so good at rating.

[45:00] I'm starting to think that Dan is the guy.

Stuart Wellington

[45:02] You want to be mad at him, but you got to give him credit.

[45:04] No, I got to recognize game.

Elliott Kalan

[45:05] Unless I'm starting to think that Dan is the guy rating all these movies on IMDb.

Dan McCoy

[45:08] I read a lot of reviews and stuff.

[45:10] I think I do have a pretty good idea of what the conventional wisdom is on a movie.

Elliott Kalan

[45:15] This is my mistake because I've been reading books all this time.

[45:18] Yeah.

[45:18] I should have been reading the IMDb reviews.

Stuart Wellington

[45:22] Okay.

[45:23] Waste of time.

[45:26] Okay.

[45:26] Hey, sorry, Charles Dickens.

Dan McCoy

[45:28] What did you think about Midnight Meat Train?

[45:29] Nothing?

[45:30] Then fuck you.

[45:31] My strategy finally paid off.

Stuart Wellington

[45:36] One out of a million times.

[45:39] This is coming handy.

[45:40] Okay, gang.

[45:41] Our next movie is a horror comedy from 2012 titled Fresh Meat.

[45:47] A dysfunctional gang of criminals takes a middle-class Maori family hostage

[45:52] and discovers too late that they are cannibals.

[45:56] Oh, I've seen this movie.

[45:58] The big star, of course.

[46:01] Jango fed himself to Muramorrison.

[46:03] That's what I was guessing.

Elliott Kalan

[46:06] Does he play – I've never watched the Boba Fett show.

[46:09] Does he play Boba Fett on the show?

[46:10] He does, yeah.

[46:11] Okay, that makes sense.

Stuart Wellington

[46:12] And he's complained about how often they make him say lines and not wear his mask,

[46:17] which is correct.

[46:18] That's the correct take.

[46:20] Boba Fett shouldn't talk.

[46:21] He should wear a mask.

[46:22] He should wear his mask, yeah.

[46:24] All his lines should have been said by Ming-Na because she's great.

[46:28] Wait, is Ming-Na winning that show?

[46:29] Yeah, yeah.

[46:30] She's his major dome.

[46:33] She's his left partner.

Elliott Kalan

[46:33] I didn't know that.

[46:34] I would watch that show if I knew that.

[46:36] She's great.

[46:36] Ellie, you're up first, right?

[46:39] I think.

Stuart Wellington

[46:39] Am I?

[46:40] Yeah, you can go first.

Elliott Kalan

[46:41] Oh, for what was it called?

[46:42] Fresh Meat?

[46:43] Fresh Meat.

Stuart Wellington

[46:43] Fresh Meat.

[46:44] A movie Dan has seen.

[46:46] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[46:49] Well, how about horror comedy?

[46:52] Horror comedy.

[46:53] People might like it.

Dan McCoy

[46:57] I'll go higher on that.

Stuart Wellington

[47:01] 5.4.

[47:02] Elliot, good one, dude.

[47:04] Oh, finally.

[47:04] Oh, the man.

[47:05] Finally.

[47:06] Looks like the tide is turning.

[47:07] I'm excited.

Dan McCoy

[47:08] The desire for horror comedy.

Elliott Kalan

[47:09] Okay, so the next movie in.

Dan McCoy

[47:11] With the general public versus me.

[47:12] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[47:12] The general public do not like to laugh and scream at the same time, even though they do.

Dan McCoy

[47:16] Although, yeah.

[47:16] I mean, like, lately it's been big again.

Elliott Kalan

[47:19] Well, I guess the thing is, horror comedies really rely on the individual horror comedy.

[47:24] No one's going to, I think people are not going to go out of their way.

[47:27] They're going to be like, a horror comedy?

[47:28] That's my favorite genre.

[47:29] But they do enjoy it when they like it.

[47:31] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[47:31] Yeah, so the next movie in the meat lovers category is another horror comedy.

[47:37] Let's keep it up.

[47:38] Uh-oh.

[47:38] From 2016, it is the French movie Raw.

[47:42] Is that a comedy?

[47:43] It depends on what you think's funny.

Dan McCoy

[47:47] I still haven't seen Raw.

[47:49] Oh, it's great.

Stuart Wellington

[47:50] I know.

[47:50] I should see it.

Elliott Kalan

[47:51] In the vein of such other French horror comedies as Inside and Martyrs.

Stuart Wellington

[47:56] A young woman studying to be a vet develops a craving for human flesh.

[48:02] Now, that means like a veterinarian, not a veteran.

[48:04] Because who would study to be a veteran?

[48:05] Studying to be a veteran.

[48:06] I mean, I guess.

[48:07] I mean, if you're going to, yeah.

[48:08] The Army War College, I guess.

[48:10] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[48:13] Army War College?

[48:15] Yeah, that's a real place.

[48:16] Is it?

[48:16] Yeah.

[48:17] It's such a weird title.

[48:18] Oh, like.

[48:19] That sounds right.

[48:20] Let's get Army and war in there.

[48:22] But there's also.

[48:23] Well, the Army runs it.

[48:24] Yeah.

[48:25] College on war.

[48:27] Yeah.

[48:27] No, I mean, it all makes sense.

[48:28] It just sounds stupid.

[48:30] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[48:30] Army Hammer runs it, keeping the cannibal theme alive.

[48:33] Oh, man.

Stuart Wellington

[48:36] Elliot, that was delicious.

Elliott Kalan

[48:38] Okay.

[48:39] That joke was delicious.

Stuart Wellington

[48:41] Stan, why don't you.

[48:42] Elliot, have you seen Raw?

Elliott Kalan

[48:45] Actually, you know what?

[48:45] I have not seen Raw.

[48:46] I remember when it came out.

[48:47] I considered seeing it, and I didn't get around to it.

Stuart Wellington

[48:49] So, yeah.

[48:50] We know that the director, Julie DeCornio, her movies can be a little divisive, but people

[48:54] seem to like them.

[48:56] And by people, I mean me.

[48:58] Stuart Wellington.

[48:59] What else did she do?

Elliott Kalan

[49:01] Titan.

[49:01] She did do Titan.

[49:02] Okay, yeah, that was, you and I are on opposite sides of the divide on Titan, I think.

[49:07] Okay, well.

[49:09] But you know what?

[49:09] Oh, you mean?

[49:10] If I watched movies, if I ever got to watch a movie all the way through, I think I would

[49:14] have liked Titan more.

[49:15] There was something about having to stretch it out over a few days that made it harder.

Stuart Wellington

[49:19] Well, especially because of the wildly changing styles of movie that it is.

[49:24] Yes.

[49:25] Is more fun in one sitting.

[49:27] Yes, I think that's true.

Dan McCoy

[49:29] And, well, what carries you over that, though, is like tone, which is hard to like break and

[49:35] then rebuild.

Elliott Kalan

[49:36] Well, there's also, there's some movies where I'm like, it's the same reason there are TV

[49:39] shows that I don't watch, that I would rather watch as a movie if they exist that way, because

[49:42] it's like, I don't want to live in this feeling for this long a period of time.

[49:46] Like Friends?

Stuart Wellington

[49:48] Yeah, exactly.

[49:49] I wish Friends was just a movie.

[49:50] I mean, Friends is a movie.

[49:51] It's called The Big Chill, right?

Dan McCoy

[49:54] Friends.

Stuart Wellington

[49:55] Delicious.

[49:56] What?

Dan McCoy

[49:57] Okay, I'm going to say that Raw got a 7.0.

Elliott Kalan

[50:02] I'm going to say it got a 7.4.

Stuart Wellington

[50:05] Dan sniped it, 7.0.

[50:07] Oh, exactly.

[50:08] Wow.

[50:09] Headshot.

[50:10] Critical role.

Dan McCoy

[50:12] Okay.

[50:13] This is, you know, honestly, I didn't know that this was a skill.

[50:16] I gotta figure out what to do with this.

Elliott Kalan

[50:19] Dan, if only there was a way to make money doing this.

[50:20] There is not.

Stuart Wellington

[50:22] Okay.

[50:22] The next movie in the meat lovers category.

Elliott Kalan

[50:25] Dan is now traveling.

[50:26] He's now with a carnival.

[50:27] And he's like, yeah, see if you can guess an IMDb score as well as I can.

Dan McCoy

[50:35] Oh, man.

[50:36] If you win, you get one of these spider rings.

Elliott Kalan

[50:40] And if I lose, I have to bite the head off a chicken.

[50:45] Spider rings.

[50:46] Then there's a huge stuffed animal.

[50:49] And the way you ring it so they never win that is you start naming movies that don't exist.

[50:52] There's no way they can accurately get the score.

[50:54] Yeah.

Stuart Wellington

[50:55] The next movie in the meat lovers category is a comedy from 2016, an animated comedy titled Sausage Party.

[51:03] Oh, yeah.

[51:04] Sure.

[51:05] A sausage strives to discover the truth about his existence.

Elliott Kalan

[51:11] Sausage Party famous for pushing animators to the edges of sanity with the terrible working conditions and schedule.

Stuart Wellington

[51:19] Stars Seth Rogen.

[51:22] Kristen Wiig.

[51:23] Jonah Hill.

[51:25] Yeah.

[51:26] Some apatous.

[51:27] Michael Cera.

Dan McCoy

[51:29] I usually like Rogen.

[51:31] I think this is probably the worst thing he's done.

Elliott Kalan

[51:34] That Ninja Turtles movie was enjoyable.

Dan McCoy

[51:36] It was supposed to be good.

[51:37] Yeah.

[51:37] Did you see it?

Elliott Kalan

[51:38] I took Sammy to go see it.

[51:39] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[51:39] I want to see that.

[51:41] That looks fun.

[51:42] I like turtles.

[51:44] Stuart loves turts.

[51:45] Yeah.

[51:45] You did a whole presentation on them.

[51:48] Top turts.

Elliott Kalan

[51:49] My second favorite Stuart presentation.

[51:51] Top turts.

Dan McCoy

[51:53] Stuart, you got to call on one of us because he'll be forgetting on you.

Stuart Wellington

[51:56] Elliot, why don't you tell me?

[51:58] What do you think?

[51:58] For Sausage Party?

[51:59] Yep.

[52:00] I'm going to say.

[52:01] Remember, people who watched the movie rated this.

Elliott Kalan

[52:06] It's not all crits.

[52:08] It's not all crits.

[52:09] But it's hard for me to go above a 4.8.

[52:11] Okay.

Dan McCoy

[52:12] Dan.

[52:12] I know there are a lot of numbnuts out there.

[52:15] So I'm going to go up to a 5.4.

[52:20] Dan got it with a 6.1.

Stuart Wellington

[52:23] Wow.

[52:24] Not quite ET, but getting closer to ET rating.

[52:27] Okay.

[52:28] Now we're into the final category of the night.

Elliott Kalan

[52:30] I have to remember that this is the IMDb was the place where for decades, I think, the number

[52:36] one best movie ever made was The Shawshank Redemption.

[52:39] Yeah.

[52:39] Which is a very good movie.

[52:40] It's a very good movie.

[52:42] But the idea that that was the height of artistic achievement in the realm of film was,

[52:46] you know.

Stuart Wellington

[52:47] Well, because it's based on the likelihood of if your dad is walking by a TV in the middle

[52:52] of a Saturday afternoon and it's on the TV, will he stop and watch it?

Elliott Kalan

[52:55] I mean, I'll stop and watch it.

[52:57] It's a great movie.

[52:57] It is a great movie.

[52:58] But it's, you know, there's, it's not, it's not a, it's the ambition in it is, is relatively

[53:02] low.

[53:02] You know.

Stuart Wellington

[53:03] What's your, guys, real quick before we, there's a side question.

[53:07] What is the movie that your dad, what's your dad's favorite movie?

[53:11] Like, what movie is your dad going to stop and watch on a Saturday afternoon the most?

Dan McCoy

[53:20] Look, my dad, my dad is a man of an older generation.

[53:24] I think that.

Elliott Kalan

[53:24] That makes sense.

[53:25] The math checks out.

[53:26] If he was a younger generation, it would be weird.

[53:28] Time travel would have to be involved.

[53:30] Uh-huh.

[53:30] Yeah, yeah.

[53:30] He's a thing at the doorstep.

Dan McCoy

[53:32] There's content in it that he wouldn't be.

Elliott Kalan

[53:34] My dad's a Benjamin Button, so he's a baby right now.

Dan McCoy

[53:37] There's content in it he wouldn't be as keen on today.

[53:40] I'm just trying to protect my dad from the judgment of our listenership.

[53:45] It's going to be like Animal House or some shit.

[53:47] He loves Birth of a Nation.

[53:49] I think the one I can remember him really loving is M.A.S.H., which is a great movie in many

[53:54] ways, but also has a lot of unpleasant 70s, like, being mean to women and minorities.

Elliott Kalan

[54:00] It's that kind of, like, National Lampoon-ish style of humor.

[54:03] It's like, it's time for white guys to be able to rebel by being mean to everybody else.

[54:08] Exactly.

[54:09] We've got to take down the system while still maintaining our level of entitlement at all

[54:13] times.

Stuart Wellington

[54:14] Yeah, like, I mean, like, my dads are like Lawrence of Arabia or like Zulu or Zulu Dawn.

[54:20] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[54:21] I mean, if you can look past the racism, Zulu's a solid action-adventure movie.

[54:25] Yeah.

[54:26] And with my dad, similarly, I think probably The Patriot with Mel Gibson.

[54:32] Like, because he loves, his highest compliment for a movie is if he can watch it and be like,

[54:37] that's how they really fought battles back then.

[54:39] That's how they really did it.

Stuart Wellington

[54:40] Yeah, my dad's like that too.

[54:42] I know.

[54:42] At one point he was like, he's like, it doesn't make sense that they wouldn't have better defensive

[54:46] equipment against the siege and Helm's Deep.

[54:49] And I'm like, you need to shut your fucking mouth.

Elliott Kalan

[54:52] But at the same time, the movie that my dad –

Stuart Wellington

[54:53] Don't make me Oedipus, you dad.

Elliott Kalan

[54:55] The movie that my dad for years tried to get me to watch and I refused to watch it because

[54:59] he wanted me to watch it so badly was Breaking Away, the biking movie, the bicycle bike riding

[55:03] movie.

[55:04] And that's a great movie.

[55:04] Yeah, shot in Indiana.

[55:05] Yeah.

[55:05] And that's a genuinely great movie.

[55:07] I'm glad I finally watched it.

Dan McCoy

[55:09] It wasn't asked, but I think that my mom's favorite, the ones that I remember are – she

[55:14] really likes The African Queen and she liked movies with her dreamboat Paul Newman in them.

Elliott Kalan

[55:20] Yeah, well, that's what – my mom, her favorite movie is The Sting because of Robert Redford.

[55:24] She loves Robert Redford.

[55:25] Man, two hunks.

[55:27] Yeah.

[55:27] They're both in The Sting.

[55:29] Yeah.

[55:30] Two for one.

[55:31] I feel like –

[55:31] Two for one.

[55:31] You get both of them.

[55:32] Your mom and my mom could just hang out and watch The Sting and masturbate together,

[55:35] I guess.

[55:35] Oh, God.

[55:36] Don't.

[55:36] Why'd you take it there?

Dan McCoy

[55:37] I'm like – I'm trying to remember what my mom –

Elliott Kalan

[55:39] They can do it.

[55:40] I just don't know.

[55:41] You don't want to think about it.

[55:43] And my grandmother's favorite movie is One, Two, Three starring James Cagney, the Billy

[55:46] Wilder movie.

Stuart Wellington

[55:47] Another hunk.

[55:48] Man, all these hunks.

[55:49] All these boys.

[55:50] Classic Hollywood hunks.

[55:51] Yeah.

[55:52] Yeah.

[55:53] Okay.

[55:54] So, we are into the final category and it is called The Works, also known as Supreme,

[56:01] depending on what part of the country you're from.

Elliott Kalan

[56:02] Okay.

[56:03] I wonder if we should do a mini sometime where it's just our family members' favorite movies

[56:06] where we just ask around and get a sense of it.

[56:09] That would be good.

Dan McCoy

[56:10] We can get it more definitively.

[56:12] Yeah, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[56:13] We can actually ask them.

[56:14] See if my sister's favorite movies are still Teen Wolf and Ferris Bueller's Day Off as they

[56:18] were when we were kids.

Stuart Wellington

[56:20] Okay.

[56:21] So, the first movie in the works category is, I believe, a comedy from 2020 titled Work It.

[56:29] It looks like it's a Netflix movie.

[56:30] Boo.

[56:31] I hope it is shitty.

[56:33] Don't watch it.

[56:34] When Quinn Ackerman's admission to the college of her dreams depends on her performance at

[56:38] a dance competition, she forms a ragtag group of dancers.

[56:42] It's always ragtag.

[56:43] It might be a dance school.

[56:44] Why don't they tag those rags?

Elliott Kalan

[56:44] Maybe it's a dance school she's trying to get into.

[56:46] Otherwise, I don't know why it would matter.

[56:47] But they always ragtag.

[56:48] They're never, the tags are never not ragged.

Stuart Wellington

[56:51] Yeah.

[56:52] Group of dancers to take on the best squad in school.

[56:56] Now, she just needs to learn how to dance.

[56:58] Whoa.

[56:59] Okay.

[57:00] Can I tell you something?

Dan McCoy

[57:02] I've seen this movie.

[57:03] I saw it in, we were going to the wedding of a co-worker of ours, Elliot, Zach Delanzo.

Elliott Kalan

[57:14] Oh, Zach, my former writer's assistant.

[57:15] Now he's a TV writer all grown up.

[57:17] I'm so proud of that boy.

Dan McCoy

[57:18] We went upstate.

[57:19] We were staying in Albany.

[57:21] The wedding was just outside.

[57:25] Capital of New York State.

[57:26] Yeah, and after the pre-dinner, or not dinner, like cocktails the night before, it got a little rainy.

[57:35] So we went back to the hotel and we're looking for something to watch.

[57:39] And I saw on Netflix that this had Audrey's two favorite things.

[57:46] A ragtag group of underdogs and a dance movie put together.

[57:51] Oh, wow.

[57:51] Finally.

[57:51] I think this is what we got to watch.

[57:53] And, you know, for what it is, which is a Netflix streaming movie that probably was just sort of shat-ass content.

[58:03] It's a pretty fun one.

[58:04] It's like a fun little movie.

[58:07] I'll say it gets a 5.6.

Stuart Wellington

[58:11] 5.6 from Dan.

[58:15] Wow.

[58:15] Well, Dan's relying on his experience again because it's a 6.1.

[58:20] Good job, Danny boy.

Elliott Kalan

[58:22] Almost as good as Swiss Army Man.

Stuart Wellington

[58:25] Make a double feature of it.

[58:27] Okay, the next movie in the works category from 1998, a comedy titled Dirty Work.

[58:34] A loser.

[58:34] We're all familiar with this one, yeah.

[58:36] A loser finds success in the revenge for hire business.

[58:41] Starring the late, great Norm MacDonald and a bunch of other people.

[58:45] Director Bob Saget.

[58:46] I didn't realize that.

[58:47] Yeah, Bob Saget directed that.

Dan McCoy

[58:51] Dan, this is a tough one because there's two things going on here.

[58:58] Dirty and work.

[59:00] Dirty work has some huge, huge laughs in it.

[59:04] It has some very funny stuff in it.

[59:07] But on the other side, it's not very good.

Elliott Kalan

[59:11] Well, but it's the kind of movie where a regular person watching it will probably be like, I don't like this.

[59:15] But it's also got a fervent cult following.

Dan McCoy

[59:18] Yeah, no, it succeeds wildly as a comedy just on the level of making you laugh.

[59:23] As a technical piece of movie making, it's junk.

[59:28] Dan really throwing shade at the late Bob Saget.

Stuart Wellington

[59:30] Wow.

[59:31] One hour and 22 minutes.

[59:33] I mean, that's pretty great right there.

[59:36] No, I know it's got a cult following.

Elliott Kalan

[59:37] I'm giving a good review to the runtime.

Dan McCoy

[59:40] It's got a cult following.

Elliott Kalan

[59:45] Elliot, 6.8 is the score to beat.

[59:48] The dirty workers are coming out in droves.

[59:49] I'm going to say an 8.3.

[59:51] Better than ET.

Stuart Wellington

[59:53] Wow.

[59:53] Dan, you are very close.

[59:54] 6.4.

[59:56] Wow.

[59:56] Good job, Dan.

[59:57] Wow.

[59:58] Can we go back to the scores again?

[1:00:00] Who's winning?

[1:00:01] Dan's winning by a ton.

[1:00:04] But I feel like you should just keep playing for the love of the game.

[1:00:07] Yeah, I know.

Elliott Kalan

[1:00:07] I just love the experience so much.

[1:00:09] Okay, the next movie.

[1:00:10] Right now, while I'm on strike and I have a little bit of a cough that I'm getting over

[1:00:14] and I'm super stressed out, is exactly the time for me to play a game where I'm losing

[1:00:17] handily constantly.

[1:00:19] The constant stream of rejection is good for me right now.

[1:00:21] Oh, Ellie, come on.

[1:00:22] I'm just kidding.

[1:00:22] I'm just joshing with you.

[1:00:23] You have to find me.

[1:00:25] I'm just joshing.

[1:00:27] Come on.

[1:00:28] Come on.

Stuart Wellington

[1:00:29] Come on.

[1:00:30] Okay, the next movie is an action crime drama mystery thriller from 2002.

[1:00:36] Quite a grab bag of genres there.

[1:00:38] Which I feel like 2002 was really like a fucking bumper year for action crime drama mystery

[1:00:44] thrillers.

[1:00:45] Yeah.

[1:00:45] It's what got us away from the doldrums of 9-11.

[1:00:49] This is part of the works category.

[1:00:52] That's right.

[1:00:53] It's blood work.

[1:00:55] Oh, with Clint Eastwood?

[1:00:55] Mm-hmm.

[1:00:56] Still recovering from a heart transplant, retired FBI profiler Terry McCaleb, played by Clint

[1:01:03] Eastwood.

[1:01:03] I'm glad they include that in the description.

[1:01:07] Returns to service when his own blood analysis offers clues to the identity of a serial killer.

[1:01:16] Yeah.

[1:01:17] You guys see this one?

[1:01:18] You see this bad boy?

[1:01:19] I've seen this movie.

Dan McCoy

[1:01:20] I don't.

[1:01:20] It's not great, but I think it's in that genre of movies that in a simpler time when they're,

[1:01:29] you know, if you had an afternoon and everyone else was out of the house and blood work came on TNT,

[1:01:34] you'd have a good time.

[1:01:34] Yeah, you just masturbate to that.

Stuart Wellington

[1:01:36] Sure.

[1:01:36] Everybody else is out of the house.

[1:01:38] Well, last week it was to kiss the girl.

[1:01:40] Fucking towering yourself.

[1:01:41] Before that, it was copycat.

[1:01:43] Yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:01:44] And this is around the same time that Clint Eastwood did that movie called True Crime,

[1:01:48] right?

[1:01:49] Where I get the two mixed up.

[1:01:50] He's a reporter, I think.

[1:01:51] Yeah.

[1:01:52] He's got to get someone off death row.

Dan McCoy

[1:01:53] Yeah.

[1:01:54] He had a real run of kind of airport thriller.

[1:01:58] Yeah.

[1:01:58] Absolute power.

[1:02:00] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[1:02:00] This movie also stars Angelica Houston, who rules.

[1:02:05] She does rule.

[1:02:05] Yeah.

[1:02:06] She's my favorite Houston.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:07] Take that, Sam.

[1:02:09] Take that, Danny.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:11] But he wears so many hats.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:12] Okay, Dan.

[1:02:13] What do you think?

[1:02:14] What do you think?

[1:02:14] No, but if it's a hat competition, Danny is handily taking it.

[1:02:17] Angelica doesn't wear hats that much.

[1:02:19] But why should she?

[1:02:19] Her hair is a national treasure.

[1:02:21] That's true.

[1:02:23] That's what Nicolas Cage should have been going after in those movies.

[1:02:25] Angelica Houston's hair.

Stuart Wellington

[1:02:26] Yeah.

[1:02:27] And then he'd snatch it off like a wig, just like in The Witches.

[1:02:30] Ah!

Dan McCoy

[1:02:32] I'm going to say this gets a 5.8.

[1:02:35] Okay, 5.8 from Dan.

[1:02:37] Okay, I'm giving it a 6.5.

Stuart Wellington

[1:02:39] Remember, L.A., you nailed it.

[1:02:40] America Loves Clint, 6.4.

[1:02:42] Wow.

[1:02:43] Oh, yeah.

Elliott Kalan

[1:02:44] Dan, never underestimate Clint Eastwood in a watchable, nothing special movie.

[1:02:49] Yeah.

[1:02:50] I saw it.

Dan McCoy

[1:02:52] Have you seen Tightrope?

[1:02:54] I saw a rep screening.

[1:02:55] Not in a long time, but yeah.

[1:02:56] Of it recently.

[1:02:57] Like, I had seen it when I was younger, and I must have seen like an edited for TV version.

Stuart Wellington

[1:03:04] Well, they used to show it on like TNT a lot.

Dan McCoy

[1:03:06] Yeah.

[1:03:06] Seeing the unedited Tightrope, I'm like, this movie is way like kinkier and sleazier than I expected out of Clint Eastwood.

[1:03:15] Like, in a good way.

[1:03:16] I was like, oh, this is great.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:18] Clint Eastwood, I think because he, people think of him as a conservative, because he is politically very conservative.

[1:03:24] I think, and he makes a lot of movies like Bloodwork, or has made a lot.

[1:03:27] I mean, he's an old man now.

[1:03:28] He doesn't make that many movies anymore.

[1:03:29] Is, I think people forget what a, what an adventurous filmmaker he can be.

[1:03:34] Yeah.

[1:03:35] He, his filmography, both starring and directing, is filled with very interesting choices, and like, not willing, not being afraid to push what he's capable of on screen, or what his image is, or what kind of story he can tell.

[1:03:46] I really admire him as an artist in a lot of ways.

Stuart Wellington

[1:03:48] Well, also, like, for a guy who, again.

[1:03:50] Also a guy who famously is like, one take and done.

[1:03:54] Yeah.

[1:03:54] Yes.

Elliott Kalan

[1:03:54] Also, yeah, he is also not that interested in doing hard work a lot of the time.

Dan McCoy

[1:04:01] Again, a notable conservative, but there's a scene in Tightrope, I remember, where he's like, interviewing, like, a homosexual prostitute has been sent to him by the, like, the person who's taunting him.

[1:04:13] And he doesn't treat, like, this person badly.

[1:04:16] He just treats them like a person who, like, he's trying to figure out what's going on.

[1:04:20] At the end, the prostitute's like, you don't want to have sex?

[1:04:23] He's like, nah.

[1:04:24] He's like, well, don't knock until you try it.

[1:04:26] And Clint goes, who says I haven't tried it?

[1:04:28] And I'm like, Clint, look at you.

[1:04:30] Ooh.

[1:04:31] Wow.

Elliott Kalan

[1:04:32] He's a real old-school economic conservative for the most part.

[1:04:36] You know, like, I think he's a guy who, he's literally a guy who just does not want you to tell him what to do.

[1:04:41] And that's basically it.

[1:04:42] So, I read an article about him recently where he was like, he's like, the only superhero I ever would have wanted to play was Namor the Submariner.

[1:04:49] And I'm like, what?

[1:04:53] I mean, he said this a long time ago.

[1:04:55] I was like, what a weird choice.

[1:04:58] But I can kind of see it working when he was young.

[1:05:00] Like, maybe, if only, you know.

Stuart Wellington

[1:05:03] Yeah, yeah.

[1:05:03] Like a The Bug-Isled era.

[1:05:06] Yeah, yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:05:07] I hope he said it with like that dreamy tone in his voice that you gave him.

[1:05:11] Like, a regret.

Stuart Wellington

[1:05:12] Well, because Namor has a, in the comics, has a pretty clear mission objective.

[1:05:18] Which is half-sex with Sue Storm.

[1:05:20] Yeah, very much so.

[1:05:21] Possibly with Reed Richards watching.

Elliott Kalan

[1:05:23] Okay.

[1:05:23] But, Stuart, you mentioned, yeah, because he wants to cuck Reed Richards.

[1:05:26] Yeah, that's what he's more into.

[1:05:27] Yeah.

[1:05:28] Well, you mentioned The Beguiled.

[1:05:29] Like, Clint Eastwood has done a lot of stuff that you wouldn't think of as Clint Eastwood stuff, you know?

[1:05:34] Movie rules.

[1:05:34] He didn't direct that.

[1:05:35] He starred in it, but still.

[1:05:36] But he's great.

Stuart Wellington

[1:05:37] Yeah.

[1:05:37] Okay.

[1:05:38] So, we've talked about a lot of great movies today.

[1:05:40] But I think there's only one movie that can really finish out this game, okay?

[1:05:43] And if L.A. can get it, he will tie this game.

[1:05:47] That seems impossible.

[1:05:49] Well, let's find out.

[1:05:50] This is a action comedy crime movie from 1990, Men at Work.

[1:05:58] Last movie in the works category.

[1:06:01] The dirty work of its day, Men at Work.

[1:06:03] Two garbage men uncover a conspiracy involving illegal toxic waste dumping and decide to bring the whole operation down.

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:12] Is that the only movie that the two Estevez brothers have made together?

[1:06:15] Did they make any other movies together?

Stuart Wellington

[1:06:16] Weren't they in like, were they in Young Guns?

[1:06:20] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[1:06:20] They did the Young Guns movies together, right?

Dan McCoy

[1:06:22] Charlie Sheen and the Estevez.

[1:06:24] I don't know.

[1:06:25] I never actually saw the Young Guns movies.

[1:06:27] Oh.

[1:06:27] Although I strangely saw Men at Work multiple times as a child.

Elliott Kalan

[1:06:34] I think they were in Young Guns.

[1:06:35] I'm surprised they have not tried to reboot that as Old Guns.

Stuart Wellington

[1:06:39] Man, that would be great, right?

[1:06:40] Or Old Young Guns.

[1:06:41] Mm-hmm.

[1:06:42] Yep.

[1:06:43] So do you guys need me to tell you the stars or the director?

[1:06:47] Who is the director of Men at Work?

[1:06:49] Emilio Estevez.

[1:06:51] Oh, I forgot.

Dan McCoy

[1:06:52] Oh, yeah.

[1:06:53] Is Dean Cameron in Men at Work as well?

[1:06:56] I think he might be.

[1:06:57] Pain saw.

[1:06:59] Anyway.

[1:07:01] Men at Work.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:02] Men at, yep, hell yeah, he is.

[1:07:03] He plays the pizza man.

[1:07:05] And Keith David's in it.

[1:07:08] Oh.

[1:07:09] Does that bump up your score, Elliot?

[1:07:10] I mean, to me, I will.

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:12] I'm on.

[1:07:13] I will.

[1:07:13] If I haven't been on record before, I will go on record as saying anything with Keith David

[1:07:16] in it is better than anything that doesn't have.

[1:07:18] Well, that's not true.

[1:07:19] There's lots of great movies that.

[1:07:20] There's a lot of bad Keith David movies and there are a lot of great movies without him

[1:07:23] in it.

[1:07:23] But you're saying he would improve most films.

[1:07:25] He improves any movie he's in.

[1:07:27] Real quick.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:27] If it's going to affect your score, the tagline for this movie is, two garbage men who know

[1:07:33] when something smells funny.

[1:07:37] They don't if you've seen the movie.

Elliott Kalan

[1:07:40] Elliot, do you want to guess or should I guess?

[1:07:42] I was just recently watching.

[1:07:43] I did take some time out of my day recently to watch some vintage interview footage of

[1:07:46] Keith David talking about being in Platoon.

[1:07:49] And yeah, it just sounds great.

[1:07:51] But so Men at Work.

Stuart Wellington

[1:07:55] If you can get this right on the dot, you win the game.

[1:07:59] Well, I'm not going to.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:00] But I'm going to say 5.5.

Dan McCoy

[1:08:03] Wow.

[1:08:05] This is going to be very close because I was going to say 5.3.

[1:08:10] 5.9.

Stuart Wellington

[1:08:12] Elliot ties the game.

[1:08:13] Yes.

Dan McCoy

[1:08:13] Closer.

[1:08:14] Yes.

[1:08:15] He doesn't win though because he had to get it completely on the dot.

Stuart Wellington

[1:08:18] Guys, this was so much fun.

[1:08:19] Thanks for playing my game.

[1:08:21] Next time, maybe we'll just play a regular The Flophouse Motion Picture.

[1:08:25] Puzzle Parlor or Puzzle Palace or whatever I said.

[1:08:29] Yeah.

Dan McCoy

[1:08:29] But instead, you guys vanquished the pizza parlor.

Stuart Wellington

[1:08:33] Okay.

[1:08:33] So this was a Flophouse Mini.

[1:08:36] The Flophouse Mini is part of the Flophouse Podcast.

Elliott Kalan

[1:08:37] It's like a Five Nights at Freddy type situation.

Stuart Wellington

[1:08:40] Flophouse Podcast is part of the Maximum Fun Podcast Network where you can get a ton of

[1:08:44] great comedy and culture podcasts.

[1:08:46] The show is produced lovingly by Alexander Smith.

[1:08:50] Thanks so much for playing with me.

Dan McCoy

[1:08:51] I've been Stuart Wellington.

[1:08:52] I've been Dan McCoy.

[1:08:53] I want to clarify something from before.

[1:08:56] I like hearing nice things from people on the street.

[1:09:00] Like, don't let my awkwardness dissuade you.

[1:09:03] I like that part.

[1:09:04] I'm just trying to say that depending on my own mental health that day, my warmth may vary.

[1:09:10] But I appreciate it and thank you for anyone who likes the show.

[1:09:15] Mm-hmm.

Elliott Kalan

[1:09:16] Okay.

[1:09:16] And I'm Elliot Kalin.

[1:09:17] I just want to remind you to go to theflophouse.simpleticks.com for tickets to the Flop TV show coming up next week.

[1:09:25] And go to vidiotsfoundation.org if you want to get tickets for our LA live shows October 19th.

[1:09:30] And don't come up and talk to me.

[1:09:32] I'm not a Dan McCoy.

[1:09:34] Just kidding.

[1:09:34] I do want you to come up and talk to me.

[1:09:35] He's a big old teddy bear.

[1:09:37] No, it's always a pleasure when someone comes up and says, hey, I like your podcast.

[1:09:40] That's great.

[1:09:41] Feel free to come up to me.

[1:09:42] Yeah.

[1:09:43] And go to Stuart's Bar and spend some money and tell him you like the podcast also.

[1:09:47] Mm-hmm.

Stuart Wellington

[1:09:48] So that's all, folks.

[1:09:50] Bye.

[1:09:58] Maximum Fun.

Elliott Kalan

[1:10:00] A worker-owned network.

[1:10:01] Of artist-owned shows.

[1:10:03] Supported.

[1:10:04] Directly.

[1:10:05] By you.

FH Mini 88 - Motion Picture Puzzle Palace

Transcript

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